Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update Classic: Boat Fished

Episode Date: June 29, 2024

We’ve dealt with catfishing on this show, but today’s Second Date might be the first case of BOATfishing in recorded history!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else.

Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Dr. Laurie Santos, and to welcome the new year, my podcast, The Happiness Lab, is releasing a series of happiness how-to guides to help you in 2025. I'll distill the wisdom of world-class experts into easy-to-digest, actionable tips. Struggling with tough emotions?

We have a how-to guide. Worried that you're not enough? We got you. Self-obsessed and want to get over yourself? There's a guide for that too. The Happiness Lab's how-to season starts January 1st. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers.

So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. People, my people, what's up?

This is Questlove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season, but, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far I mean we talked to A. Marie

Johnny Marr, E. Jonathan Schechter Billy Porter and so many more look if you haven't heard these episodes yet hey now's your chance you gotta check them out listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Second Date Update. You guys feeling the warm breeze in your hair right now? I'm not, but I want to. I feel it in my head. The sand stuck in your bikini bottoms the wet splashes on your face of what i hope isn't contaminated lake water how are you making this dream a nightmare we're just gonna get right to the second date today with one of our listeners alan because he's one of the smart people. He took his date out to a place that was difficult to quickly escape from, out in the middle of the water.

Oh, my gosh. Isn't that right, Alan? I'm scared. Yes, that's absolutely correct. Yes. Don't own it like that, bro. Are you all trying to say you went boating? Is that what you're trying to say?

I think so, Brooke. Yes, I did take my date on the lake. Okay. Okay. And what's your date's say? I think so, Brooke. Yes, I did take my date on the lake. Okay. Okay. And what's your date's name? Her name is Erica. Okay. I met her on Bumble.

On Bumble. Yeah. I mean, how was your guys' conversation? It was great. Well, first of all, she's gorgeous. Of course. And she's fun. And she likes to have a good time.

She's outdoorsy, which is great, because so am I. Okay. All right. Makes sense. which is great, because so am I. Okay. All right. Makes sense. Everything is matching up between you and Erica. So we met up at a lake, and we went kayaking. Okay. All right.

That's fun. So she shows up looking like a supermodel in her water attire. I mean, so hot. It's such a fun date. I love that you planned and you put some activities together. You thought about what she liked. I love that you, like, planned and you, you know, put some activities together. You thought about what she liked. I mean, I bet she was stoked. Definitely.

And I brought a couple of beers just to, like, relax, you know, because it's our first date. Yeah. We had a great conversation. We went on the kayak. It's the kayak for two. Okay. Oh, even better. I was going to ask.

Yeah, it's very romantic. I don't know why in my head I was picturing a kayak for two like her sitting on top of his shoulders while they paddle like that sounds like a romantic type of activity

have you been kayaking before the fun type of kayaking yeah but do you feel like you were able to connect with her while you guys

were out there we had great conversations you know I made her laugh and you know we were out there for about like an hour and then her arms got tired you know so we went back in you I made her laugh. And, you know, we were out there for about like an hour. And then her arms got tired.

You know, so we went back in. You just made her paddle the entire time? Yeah, pretty much. Okay. So, like, I was actually kind of happy just because it was hot out and I was getting sunburned. So I didn't really mind. So then we paddled to the shore. I mean, I'm sorry.

We paddled to like, you know, we left the lake. And then. Okay. Don't know, we left the lake. And then... Okay. I don't know why you sound so weird. Wherever the ground is, it's not a beach. Okay. Okay. You found land.

Alan, I can tell just by your voice that you're sounding a little bit nervous right now. Going pretty quick, buddy. It's okay. I mean, you must have just really liked Erica a lot. Yeah, I did. I really did like her. And I was hoping for for a second date.

How did you end it? You said you paddled to the shore and then what? We paddled to shore and then I actually got stuck in my kayak. She had to drag the kayak and me out with her poor, sore

arms. I felt so bad. She paddled me out like I was a dead fish. I gotta say, that's not a sexy look to leave on. It was embarrassing at the start, but at the end, we both had a really good laugh about it. Okay. Okay. At least you were able to get on the same page. I mean, it's funny.

I just picture her trying to put canola oil all over your body, trying to slip you out of your kayak hole. No, it was actually olive oil. Oh, well I'm glad that you had some type of oil handy. I always bring some type of oil with me. Oh, good man. I can't tell if Alan's joking or not. You're joking, right, Alan? Maybe, I don't know.

He's serious. joking or not you're joking right maybe I don't know so since that date happened have you been keeping in touch with Erica like how's that been well I mean I texted her and no response and then I went back on bum ball and I was trying to get a hold of her but nothing it's like dead silence I don't think it was because she dragged me out like i was a person on baywatch um but that's what i was gonna ask she she had to pull you up physically was there any other physical contact a hug a high five a kiss anything it'd be hard to do a hug with you're so slippery with the oil slipped right now no kiss no kiss you know because i was a gentleman um but we did give a hug. I couldn't get that close to her because my life jacket was bulky. Oh, you kept the life jackets on for the hug. The date was actually pretty successful, even though it sounds like it might have been an epic fail.

I feel like, yeah, maybe next time like half hour kayaking and then maybe go get food and a drink or something as well. He brought two light beers with him. What do you want? I did. I did. I brought a couple of light beers and a box of Cheez beers with him. What do you want? I did. I brought a couple of light beers and a box of Cheez-Its that we were throwing at each other. Nothing wrong with a box of soggy Cheez-Its.

Yes, wrong. Who doesn't like a soggy Cheez-It? We all do. You can't argue with that. So I don't know what's wrong with this girl, Erica. We're going to call her and try and figure it out. We'll get to the bottom of it with your Second date update.

Next. Second date update. Oh, I just, I can't stop thinking about the awkward life vest hug. It's arms sticking straight out. Probably wet. The sound of wet cloth

plastic rubbing together. Just a lot of squeaking. Yeah. Like two dolphins trying to french kiss not the most romantic ending that we've ever heard on the show but that's how alan ended his date with erica poor alan after they spent about an hour together out on the lake and so ever since then she's been ghosting him and alan wants our help to turn that life vest hug into a lifelong relationship.

Oh. I see what you did there. I love vests. You will. No, let's stop. Alan, how you doing, man? Good. You know, I was actually just thinking,

maybe when she pulled me up on shore, I might have looked less manly, and I'm pretty manly. No, I agree. Pulling a guy in a life vest out of a kayak doesn't sound like it's literally hers like okay come on buddy let's get you out of the kayak nothing screams testosterone to me like being pulled out of a kayak he's like grab the oil no yeah but uh no maybe she saw it differently it just sucks that that was like your last impression too i mean i know that you guys got to laugh about it and that's cool, but like that's-

But I just checked my Bumble account and I can't find her. I think she blocked me or she just unfollowed me. You can unmatch people. So that's probably what she did. Okay, so she's gonna really look forward to this call from us. Yeah, let's not speculate anymore.

We're just gonna call Erica and see what she has to say. We'll ask her exactly how manly you were okay all right okay you shouldn't say okay i'm gonna dial her number right now we'll see what you have to say let's do this hello hey is this er? It is. Hey, Erica. My name is Jeff from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. How are you doing? I'm good.

I'm sorry, where are you from? We're from a radio show. It's called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning on Every Morning. Yep. You can also get us on podcast on Spotify if you want to look us up there. Oh, okay.

Sorry, what do you want? We want to ask you a little bit about a date that you went on recently with one of our listeners. I'm trying to help our friend. Yeah, something we do call a second date update. Do you remember going out recently with a guy named Alan? Oh, Alan? Yes.

Alan's a liar? That guy is the biggest liar. What? He's a liar? Whoa. You mean the manly man that you pulled out of the kayak we didn't need to do that she's like oh my god that is such a i i'm sorry i don't mean to interrupt erica but that is not what i think any of us expected like we talked to alan and he was

i didn't see liar written all over him by any means like He seems like very wholesome. I don't think he could get away with a lot. And humble. Wholesome, humble hunk is how we read it. Oh, so then he continues to lie to you guys too, and he's totally fooled you then. What, is he like some player or something? What are you saying?

No, I wouldn't go. Okay, what was your take? Okay, well, so on his profile, he talked, his boat, how he's on his boat all the time. Yeah. So like when we started talking, he invited me out on his boat. Okay. Not a dumb kayak.

Oh. He just said, I have a boat, which everyone perks. I mean, Alexis. I was going to boat, but I wouldn't go on a kayak. Wait, you thought he meant boat, boat, not man powered boat. Yeah, of course. Like a boat with a motor. Okay.

But why does that matter? Like, he's cute, right? It's a big difference. That's for sure. It is disappointing. Why does it matter? Like, for every reason possible. First of all, his picture, the way he like has them framed, it looks like he's on the water, but he kind of cuts out like, I don't know, the kayak part.

Oh, OK. So you were expecting to be out on some like yacht. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, one where I don't have to paddle. Yeah. Yeah. But but I mean, were you able to get past that initial shock? Like he said he brought some beers and you guys had a good time. I didn't want to be completely rude, and, like, we're out there anyway, so I was like, okay, I'll get on this, like, we'll do it. And we're out there for, like, an hour, and my arms are on fire. I didn't expect to be doing a workout this day.

And finally, we get back to the the shore and he gets stuck in his yeah yeah he told us that part of the story and i don't want to sound super judgmental here but doesn't it seem a little bit superficial no but that's the only thing that you're interested in no no i'm saying you okay i'm planning to have a fun summer like not on a kayak you can twerk on a kayak trust me it takes a little extra balance but you can pull it off you want to go kayak it with jeff yeah and you know it's like kayak was a no-go right from the beginning yeah of course why wouldn't you just tell him that i don't know he seemed very excited about the whole thing. I didn't want to, like, burst his whole bubble. And I was like, look, again, I mean, then I don't have to work out later.

So it just was fine. You don't have to work out later. Fortunately, you didn't burst his bubble then, but you burst it now because he's on the other line listening. Wait, what? Yeah. Alan's been there the whole time and wants to talk to you. Are you saying you're not going to go on a date with me because my kayak is not a boat? Technically, if you look up in the dictionary, a kayak is technically a boat.

Alan, have you been listening? She doesn't want the kayak. I know, but I'm just saying, technical terms, I wasn't lying. Kayak is considered a boat. Is this the first time we've ever done a second date where somebody got boat fished? Yeah. I did get boat fished. I don't know what we're talking about semantics.

I want a guy with a boat. I don't want a kid with a camp experience. Oh, well, newsflash. Newsflash, Erica. I just bought a boat, a 24-foot boat. A 24? A boat that can call R30. Did you just make up a bunch of words and then put boat at the beginning?

Wait. What did you say? You said it's a 24-foot. You said it's a 24-foot. It's a 24-foot Bennington Bolt R30 boat. What? Is it a yacht or not? What's the name number?

What's a half boat, half horse? So I don't know the name, but I do know it's 24 feet. I bought it online. It's used. I think it's called a Beddington called Bolt. No, you don't have to keep pronouncing it over and over. I don't know. Are you being serious, Alan, or were you just Google searching boats for sale while you were listening to Erica?

Oh, I got one. The listing is pending, and I think I'll be the highest bidder. What? Oh. The eBay one. Erica. So he is the soon-to-be boat owner. As long as the bidding goes through or whatever, the eBay sale.

Erica, picture yourself sitting on a Bennington Colt full 24-footer R30. Doesn't that sound hot? R30? That is a big difference. No, the model number is an R30, not the size. You guys don't know anything about boats. Excuse me. Oh, man.

I forgot we were talking to the boat expert. Yeah. But, Erica, I mean, you said that you only want to date a guy with a boat, and it sounds like he's about to own one. Look, first of all, I know a little bit about boats, and I actually, those are real. That's a real boat. Yeah, I just Googled it, and it says that boat gets all the hot chicks.

I didn't know they put that in the boat description. It's a good selling point. Erica, it sounds to me like this is kind of a match. You know, you're looking for any man who owns a boat, and he is a man who owns, I think, technically two boats. You can rig it, ride, string them together, and next thing you know, you've got a party in the back. I mean, I think if Erica doesn't say yes, I think Alexis is down. Oh, yeah, I'm ready.

Erica has two choices. Erica has two choices. She could date a hero like me or a zero like the Bumble, other people, because they don't have a boat, and I do. She found you on Bumble. What do you say, Erica? You want to go out with the hero because we'll pay for it? Look, I'm not just saying this because we were, like, out on the water,

but this whole thing sounds fishy. Oh, boat puns. Yeah. You don't believe him, huh? It sounds like while we were talking, he just jumped on eBay and put a bid on a boat. Yeah, he's like, Hey, it doesn't matter how I got a boat, I'm getting one.

Yeah, that's true. He's a man who sees what you want and he gets it for you. He's trying to deliver, dude. That's the type of person that you want to end up dating. A man that can get stuck in two boats. Dude, honestly, I can't wait to see him try to back that down. But Erica, we need an answer. What do you say?

Will you give Alan one more chance? I mean, if you throw in some SPF 50 for Alan, I'm interested. I'm not promising I'll go on it, but I'll see it. You'll look at it. I feel like we're used boat salesmen. She's going to come down and look at the boat.

Congratulations, Alan. We got a woman within viewing sight of your new boat. It took a lot of effort and time. I thank you guys, but I think we got a yes. That wasn't a yes. It was as yes as your eBay vote is right now. If I mind, it's a yes. Okay.

Good for you. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. We're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want.

And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will, too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more.

Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Dr. Laurie Santos, and to welcome the new year, my podcast, The Happiness Lab, is releasing a series of happiness how-to guides to help you in 2025. I'll distill the wisdom of world-class experts into easy-to-digest, actionable tips. Struggling with tough emotions? We have a how-to guide.

Worried that you're not enough? We got you. Self-obsessed and want to get over yourself? There's a guide for that, too. The Happiness Lab's how-To Season starts January 1st. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters.

You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. People, my people, what's up? This is Questlove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season, but you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, Eve, Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more. Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You gotta check them out. Listen to Questlove

Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.