Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Come Back Later

Episode Date: May 30, 2022

One of our listeners emailed us for help with a Second Date after he said something that rubbed his date the wrong way BEFORE their date ever even started!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025.

I'll be joined by David Roth of Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr. With guest appearances from Behind the Bastards Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis, and a few surprise guests throughout the show. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from. We have a guy named Arlo on the phone for a second date update. And Arlo, I saw your email and I read all about your date. And I think the most interesting part to me was that the girl got to your place early and you didn't let her in. That's true. I'm curious to hear about that. But first, tell me, what's the girl's name?

Dina. Dina. Okay. Arlo, before we get too far into this, do you know why she's not calling you back or are you totally mystified? I think there could be a few things. Okay. We got options.

Oh, you. I like to know that, Arlo. Okay, so let's... It goes too far in. We'll start at the beginning when she arrived early for the date. How early is early? Yeah. She was at least 15 minutes early.

Okay, so wait... 15? That's not too early, bro. I thought you were talking like an hour or two. Was the date hanging out at your house, or was she just meeting you there and you guys were going somewhere? Right, exactly. We were meeting there and then going out. Okay. But you would still plan for her to

come up to your apartment or whatever, right? I don't know. I always run late, so I hate people that are early. Yeah, me too. Me too. So what did you say? What did you tell her when she got there? I just said, like, hey, I'm sorry. I'm not ready. Do you mind coming back in a little bit? Coming back?

Why don't you just say, I'll be right down. Give me five. Honestly, I wasn't really thinking. It just came out of my mouth. Oh, got it, got it. Okay. So you shut the door on her? Like a solicitor. No, thanks. Do you have an appointment?

Wait, what did she say to this? To me, it sounded kind of like she didn't know what to say, but she'd say okay. This is an interesting strategy. Keep the girl waiting before the date even starts. That'll make her in a really good mood. It's not even

waiting. It's sending her home. Giving her a new task. So was it like 15 minutes later you guys then started your date or what yeah she came back actually probably like a half hour later which was you know honestly that was fine with me because i did need a little bit more time okay can i just what were you doing i just had like a bunch of things i had to do before i got don't ask a man what he was doing. Oh, sorry, Jeffrey. We don't know. We have no idea. Why are you asking all these questions? Just let us be. So what did you end up doing for the actual date, Arlo? So we had talked before about how much we like breakfast

food. And I knew a little cafe down the street that served breakfast. Okay, win. That's a great date idea. Yeah. Yeah. So we're walking and she's quiet. We're not talking. I wasn't sure if obviously she could have been upset for the wait or if she was just hangry, I guess is what you would say.

We're not starting things off very well. Did pancakes and bacon fix anything? Well, it was still like awkwardly quiet so i tried to break the ice by talking about bad dates like a history of that like i see he's trying to make her remember other worse dates than this one so that this one comes off looking good you know i actually don't think it's bad like self-deprecating humor can be really funny but it's all about delivery so he's like hey at least i didn't stab you like some other dates right yeah i made the last date wait two hours yeah it's all about delivery so yeah this sounds really fun did she laugh yeah she laughed at my story

what was your story this one time i went out with this girl, and when I met up with her, she was just like, I just want you to know that my dad's in the mafia, so you better treat me right. Whoa! Oh, wow. Oh, my God. Do you think she was telling the truth, or was she just trying to scare you into a good date? Well, the next day, there was a horse's head in my bed. Shut up.

No, no, no. He's lying. Oh, okay. You are funny. You got some humor all right what about and it's good too because like you're admitting like i understand that things are not going the way i want them to exactly like and that's a good thing to do yeah all a woman wants is to admit that you're wrong sometimes what was her story she said something about, a date that she had with this guy where they were going to go to a concert. And when she got there, the guy, he had a girlfriend that he invited. What?

And then I guess the guy, to make matters worse, he asked the two of them to kiss. Oh, yeah. Didn't see that coming. Look at the guys in the room. Yeah. I thought you guys were supposed to be talking about bad dates, not the best dates. It sounds like you're getting things back on track on this date, maybe. Yeah, you know, it was good to kind of relate, I think.

You know, I know obviously first dates are usually awkward anyways, and we got to talking, but then the food came out, and it was kind of bad timing because the food's so good that you just, you didn't want to talk. All you want to do is eat. Just scarf. Oh, man. Plus, she waited a really long time because of you. Yeah.

She was starving. Good point, Alexis. Okay. So how did this date end? So we finished eating, and after the check came out and all that, I asked her if she wanted to just come back to my place. Oh, like right then? Yeah, like even longer, just to keep the date going. Keep the awkward silence alive.

Hey, do you want to come back to my house and just not talk? Yeah. What'd you say? That's really funny. He's charming. Well, she actually said she already had plans. Oh, who makes plans after a date? Well, to be fair, it was 30 minutes later than it was supposed to be starting.

So after two hours together. And sometimes you always make plans after a date. That way, one, you can cut it off when it's like leave them wanting more type situation. Or if it's bad, you have an excuse to get out. Totally. I always leave the night open because I always think I'm getting laid. I know. Do the women usually have plans?

Yeah. Actually, yeah. It's also think I'm getting married. I know. Do the women usually have plans? Yeah. Actually, yeah. It's also going to make sense now. All right. So she turned you down for that. Did you end it with a kiss, a hug, anything? Just like a normal friendly hug. Okay.

Okay. Well, that's good. That's okay. At least she didn't completely disgust her. I mean, normally that wouldn't be great at the end of the day, but you guys came a long way to get there. Yeah. All right. So let's play a song. We are a little bit early here, so you're going to have to wait 30 minutes.

But then we'll come back and we'll call Dina and try and get you a second date update, okay? Perfect. All right, hold on. Hey, Arlo? Yeah. Look, I know I said I'd come back after the song to do your second date update, but I'm not quite ready yet. Oh! All right, I need a little extra time.

Can you just hold, please? Okay, Jeffrey, we don't have time for this. Okay. I know it's funny. I will see what you're trying to do, but... I'm busy, okay? Just hold on. You're not doing anything. You're literally, like, looking at your computer screen right now.

I just got to prep. Just give me a second. You're prepping. All right, we're back for your second date update. Arlo, was I worth the wait? I could totally relate to not being ready, so. Of course you can, Arlo. You're the only man in the room that understands what Jeffrey just went through.

Just to recap, Arlo started his date on the wrong foot, we think, because the girl showed up to his place 15 minutes early and he told her, no, come back later. He was busy. So 30 minutes went by and then the girl came back. They ended up having some awkward silence on the walk to the restaurant, talked about bad dates from their past and then had a pretty quiet meal, too. So he's not getting a call back and we're going to try and help him figure out why. Yeah, that would be great. I'm trying to figure it out myself. Yeah. I mean, I just think this one boils down to a bad first impression. Maybe she got home, she started thinking about the date and like that stuff just kept popping in her mind. I also think if we can get you a second date, Arlo, the best advice I could give you would be to be 15 minutes late

to even out this whole conundrum of being early and late. You need to be early. No, because she was early, so if he's late, then they meet in the middle. Trust me. Don't. Please do not follow Jose's math. Just show up on time. Okay.

There we go. Let's move forward. Alright. Are you ready to do this, Arlo? Yeah. Okay. I'm going to call Dina right now and get your second date update. Actually, you know what? Just wait one more second. Hold, please.

Oh, my God. Jeffrey. Jeffrey. Sorry. I had to readjust there. Okay. Here we go. Readjust? Let's do your second date update.

Hello? Hi, I'm looking for Dina. This is Dina. Hey, Dina. My name's Jeffrey from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. How are you doing? I'm okay. Okay.

That's good. That's good. That's a good start, Dina. Hi. We're hoping you have a second to chat with us a little bit. Sorry, what is this for? It's for a segment that we do on our show called A Second Date Update. It's where if you go out with someone and afterwards if that person isn't calling you back,

you can email us and we'll reach out to them for you to try and help you figure out the reason why. Oh, great. That's so genuine. Yeah, I really liked your response. It's more fun than it sounds. I promise, Dina. I mean, and it does mean that someone really liked you. So that's always a positive.

Yeah. You know, they're going the extra mile to try to see you again. Yeah, that's fine. Are you busy over there? Fine. That's fine. Okay. Well, can I tell you a little bit about the guy who emailed us?

His name's Arlo. Oh. Okay. Uh-oh. This is just getting better for you. Not oh, Arlo. It's an A in there. Were you hoping for somebody else?

I was hoping not to have to talk about Arlo. Okay. Oh, that doesn't sound good. Well, Arlo emailed us and told us all about the day that you guys spent together, and he had a lot of nice things to say about you, and now he's a little bit confused about why you're not reaching out to him. I mean, I'm surprised he's confused. I think it's kind of obvious.

I mean, he told us that maybe he didn't make the best first impression and there was some awkward silence and stuff in the beginning of the date. Is that all he said? No. He told us that you showed up 15 minutes early and he asked you if you could come back a little bit later. Did he tell you why? He said he was busy. Yeah, he said he was doing stuff. I'm surprised that you came back because that is such a weird request.

Instead of just saying, hey, can you wait five minutes? I'll be down in a minute. Yeah. If he had said that, it probably would have been better. But he just made it so weird. How? So I got there early and I came back like a half hour later. And when we actually met up and started talking, was like yeah sorry about that I just had to do what guys do what does that mean I hope

it doesn't mean what I'm thinking it means please say it's like play video games my mind went to either pooping yeah or something else in the bathroom. Oh, a different type of preparation before a date. I see what you're saying. Yeah. And so I was like, well, I'm just gonna hope it was pooping. It's not a good sign when that's your best option. Yeah, exactly. Maybe he was nervous and like foot and mouth type of moment right i mean maybe but my immediate reaction i was like pooping and he was like no not that wow did he say it in that same tone like not that one yeah guess again that's the tone that made her understand oh Oh, God. That tone is so creepy.

It is. Yeah, it is. Is it, bro? It is. It is. I mean, where do you even go from there in a conversation? Yeah, you don't. Like, you literally have just met someone in the first five minutes. You're finding out a lot.

Yeah, you're like, okay, then. Yeah, that's why the conversation was so awkward, and there was so much silence. Like, I didn't know what to say after that. I imagine he's like skipping down the street. It's a hard jumping off point for the conversation. Yeah, that's awkward. I mean, what do you turn it to? So, you like bacon for dinner?

Yeah. Wow. So are you saying from that moment on, it just ruined it for you and the date never got better? At the end end it got a little better we started having fun talking about bad dates pass okay like yeah i went out with this guy named arlo once yeah awkward well i mean at least that's a good sign that maybe things were getting back on track um yeah but then it came time to pay the bill. And he asked if I wanted to go back to his place,

which I think personally is just kind of creepy on a first date period, but the way he did it, he said, so I think I'm recovered from earlier. You want to go back to my place? Oh, no. What did he say?

Anything but that. What a charmer. Oh, no wonder you said no. I mean, I didn't even say no. I just knew I was never going to see him again. Yeah. I mean, honestly, I don't even know why he called us. It sounds like he was just looking for a hookup that night.

I don't know. I mean, look, Dina, maybe you'll never never see him again but you will have to hear him again because i need to tell you he's been on the other line listening and he wants to talk to you he heard this yeah he needed to hear it dina this is a good lesson okay arlo you there i'm herelo, what are you doing? Don't ask me! Oh, my God! Do your hands on the phone, please. I just mean, like... Arlo, explain yourself, is what we're trying to say. Thank you, Jeffrey.

So no one in the studio... No, again, again, no. You really did this? You actually told her, or at least hinted at her, what you were doing? I mean, she asked. You know, I wasn't going to lie to her. Oh, my God. She's honest. You don't have to lie.

You just don't bring up that specific activity. You could have just said, I was busy. I was, though. I was really busy. Okay. No, we get it, man. Dina, are you even still there? Yeah, I'm here, and he's not making it better.

So, I mean, Arlo, I think you need to try saying something to Dina to get her to see you're not a horrible person. Or just a creepy. That's not being a horrible person. Well, you know what I mean. Like, you're not some weirdo that's telling girls what you're doing all the time. Yeah. Dina, listen. I'm a normal guy that does normal guy things, and I do normal guy things often. Okay. Stop saying normal guy things a and I do normal guy things often. Okay.

Stop saying normal guy things a million times, Arlo. I'm also a normal guy, bro, just so you know. Yeah, thank you. I appreciate that. You're welcome. I know too much. No, it's not just the beginning of the day. It's how you ended it, too, telling her you recovered.

Like, what is that? In my defense, she already knew what I did before. I already told her. Yeah. So she's probably wondering if I'm ready to go. And yeah, I was. I don't know. Dina, were you wondering that? Is that the thought you had? Is that what was going through your mind? No, it wasn't what was on my mind at all. Oh, what was on your mind, Dina? Not that. Yeah. Shocking. I mean, nobodyina? Not that. Yeah. Shocking.

I mean, nobody could have guessed that in the room. It really feels like you guys are all piling on me right now, and it doesn't feel fair at all. I mean, this is what guys do. It's normal. I was just answering her question and trying to just be cool. We're not saying the action wasn't normal, okay? It's timing. We're saying that the discussion was too much and now i have images of things piling on top of each other for some reason this is not good we need

to end this gotta go do some guy stuff yeah let me just ask dina would you like to go out on another date with arlo we'll pay for it let me. Arla, man, you just go hang up. Go do what guys do. Maybe you'll feel a little bit better. Think about us. No, please don't. No, no. Please don't.

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention

because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble. Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right.

I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How To Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Ed Zetron, host of the Better Offline podcast.

And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025. I'll be joined by David Roth at Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr. With guest appearances from Behind the Bastards' Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis, and a few surprise guests throughout the show. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from.