Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Death Do Us Part

Episode Date: August 14, 2023

We have a listener on the phone today who's first kiss with his date sounded like one of the most AWKWARD experiences ever… not because of where it happened… but HOW it started…See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

John Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Second Date Update In previous second date calls, we've heard of people visiting a cemetery for a date. Oh, yeah. Remember the guy that wanted to introduce the girl to his grandparents? Oh, yeah. So he took her to meet them, sort of.

Would have been sweet, like maybe a couple years into your relationship. Yeah. They went to the gravestone. Yeah, a little intense for the first date. Right. Yeah, it's true. We've also heard about people stopping in on a funeral in the middle of their date because they forgot that they double booked it. And we're like, ooh, we can get back to the barn just a second, but I have to make a stop just real quick.

I at least have to be seen here. You can get a free bouquet of flowers, though, for your date. Oh, don't steal the flowers. They don't know, Jose. But, you know, I don't think we've ever heard about two people meeting at a funeral before. So this is definitely a Brooke and Jeffrey first. And one of our listeners, Julia, says it just happened to her. So, Julia, welcome to the show.

Hi, guys. Hey, with my background, I just have to ask, you weren't related, right? No, it wasn't a kissing cousin situation. I'm glad to say that at least. Okay. Okay. Who is this guy that you met? So I met Rick at a funeral.

Is it bad to ask that before we ask who died or do we not ask who died? Is that weird? Well, I don't know them. I'm sure it'll get weird. I'm sorry. Was it someone in your family? It was not someone in my family. It was not someone in my family. It was a good friend of mine.

It's her colleague that passed away. Oh, okay. She said she really didn't want to go by herself. And last place I thought I was going to meet someone, I'll be honest with you. Oh, really? I know it's in Alexis' top five. Yeah. I am pretty emotional and vulnerable.

She's looking for an old rich guy that's close to the same thing. She can wear her tiny black dress. With the crop top black dress? Yeah. It's cute. You can wear that to my funeral. It's okay. Sorry, sorry. I know this is more of a serious topic.

So how did you meet Rick? So it's a tiny event. There's like maybe 25, 30 people. And I'm kind of people watching. And I look up and here's this like super cute, sensitive guy. And something in me said, when are you going to find someone that's showing like this vulnerable side to them? He was looking vulnerable? Well, he said it was a funeral.

Can you imagine some stoic dude going and not crying? I haven't cried at a funeral in a while. You haven't? No. I got an appearance to uphold. I guess it is more rare than Alexis and I figure. How do you strike up a conversation with him? Because you don't know him.

It was a private event, so there was like a viewing room and then there was like a little reception area with some snacks. Totally. Did you walk up to him and go, come here often? Oh, God. Hopefully not. That's a joke. What did you do? A little bit like that.

I went in and I just thought thought let me go say hello so we started to chat and just like superficial like surface stuff what was his vibe getting chatted up in the middle of the funeral by a cute girl she was sniffling crying like yeah my name's rick hi i think it gave him like a moment of distraction because he was so upset. Yeah. It was a beautiful day and there was like a little park outside. So I don't know who brought it up, but we decided why not get some fresh air and just kind of do a lap around the park. And so, yeah.

So he was thinking what you were thinking. Like, don't you think you guys, I mean, like if a pretty girl you don't know comes up to you at a funeral, like. Yeah. Why would you leave with her? You wouldn't leave with her. Like, if your whole family's there and all your friends, like. Well, sometimes if you're wound up in that emotional situation, it just helps to get out of there for a second to have a chance to breathe and decompress. That's true.

Rather than being stuck in a room and feeling all those emotions. But not with someone you just met. Yeah. If you want to be picky about who you take your walks with to decompress rather than being stuck in a room and feeling all those emotions but not with someone you just met if you want to be picky about who you take your walks with to decompress how was the walk it was great we were like chatting you know we were kind of like just getting to know each other and so i brought up the person that passed and just kind of asked him like how he knew her. Yeah. That's a pretty normal question at a funeral. Yeah. And that's when he got really emotional. So, okay. I went in, you know, just to give him a hug, you know, for comfort. Yeah. And we did kiss. Whoa! Wow. I told you, you had a plan. Wet kiss from all the tears.

Dang. Oh my God. So wait, is this the date? Like, did you guys, you made out at the funeral? This is so weird. We just had one innocent kiss. Okay. Okay, it wasn't the whole thing.

Yeah, it didn't get heavy or anything like that. And once we got back into the room, I jokingly said to him, hey, maybe next time we'll meet outside of a funeral. Okay, yeah, because you're trying to set yourself up. No, this is where I like it. This is where I like it. This is working for me. This is my kink.

What did he say? So we exchanged numbers. Oh, okay, so he's into it. All right. Good. so he's into it. All right. Good. And? Everything seemed fine, and now I can't get a hold of him. Okay.

How long has it been? It's been about a week. A week, okay. This is the one time we can't say she got ghosted. Oh, yeah. That's a good thing. You saying it, it's different. Not the right turn today.

Okay. And there's no chance there were any other, like, cute girls at the funeral. He was just, oh, my God. How many walls did he take that day? No, there really wasn't a lot of other people there. Maybe he's just still trying to process it all, you know? That's a lot of emotion in one day. That's fair.

That's fair. I just kind of i'm curious if did i really cross the line am i in my head i i just i'm dying to know what the other don't use that word either all right oh boy i'm trying to figure out the right way to say this put your your anxieties to rest no i. No. I don't know. We'll get answers. Okay. There we go.

You're hopefully more uplifting. Second date update. Less morbid second date update. Exactly. We'll do it right after this, okay? Okay. Thanks, guys. Okay.

Hold on. Second date update. I'll be honest. The most shocking part of what we just heard after Julia met a guy at a funeral is the fact that all of my co-hosts seem to be totally cool with it. What do you mean? I was surprised. I thought

somebody here would take issue with an impromptu funeral hookup. If people get horny at my funeral I say go for it. You're getting dressed up anyway. Makeup, hair done. It's definitely unique. Jose is the only one who's kind of reserved about it. I know.

Brooke wishes they went farther. You know, the only thing in life that's guaranteed, Jeff, is death and taxes. Use my casket while it's open. That's not usually a turn on to people, though, Brooke. I don't know. I guess I underestimate this group how down you are for anything. While it's open. That's not usually a turn on to people though, Brooke. I don't know. I guess I underestimate this group how down you are for anything. And when I said hook up, that's kind of a strong word. It was an innocent kiss that proves love can blossom anywhere.

That's right. Even from death. Usually that's pretty fertile ground. Yeah. Julia, if we were. I'm trying not to laugh, Brooke. Come on. This is a serious thing.

You have to laugh as you just cry. I mean, what's your options, right? I apologize for Brooke, first of all, okay? I kind of get it. All right. Now, if we are able to get you a second date, are you excited to tell your future grandkids that you Frenched their father above a tombstone on your first date? Oh, Goded their father above a tombstone that one was at least tasteful have french in it julia yeah yeah you're excited

i am he's just super cute and sensitive and that's like what I was trying to attract so there he is sorry I met him at a funeral we'll be respectful when he's on the phone because he did get emotional when you brought up the person that passed like we don't want to we don't want to hurt his feelings or you know make him upset yeah like I don't want to be a jerk you know and be

insensitive but unless he's a jerk to us first then no promises we're still not going to no promises well if he starts it nope going low here we go we're calling right now i'm worried about this call hello hey we're looking for rick uh this is rick who's calling hey rick my name is jeff from a radio show called brooke and jeffrey in the morning hey rick hey good morning uh hey what's going on um we were past some security footage from a local cemetery We saw something interesting happen there

I don't like the angle we're taking here Oh, you don't? No We're a radio show and we do a silly segment called Second Date Update Okay Sorry, I know that was a lot

This is a segment where we try and help out our listeners who've met someone Uh, okay. Sorry, I know that was a lot. Yeah, we went all over the place. Yeah. This is a segment where we try and help out our listeners who've met someone or been on a date with someone they really liked. Try and get another date and figure out why it hasn't happened yet. So the cemetery I was talking about was where you met Julia, one of our listeners. Julia. It was about a week ago. Yeah, no, I remember Julia. What was that like for you meeting Julia? I mean, she's great, really. I didn't know her long, but we really vibed a lot of that is a funeral. We get the sense that you may have liked her a little bit because rumor has it you two kissed?

Oh, man. Yeah. Listen, guys, I'm in a... It's just kind of a weird situation. Yeah, it was. Definitely unique. I bet you didn't expect that to happen that day. Well, for sure not. Listen, I just feel

guilty, and that's why I haven't called. Uh-oh. Oh, no. Just because it was at a funeral? Are you in a relationship? That's it. No, no, I'm not at all. It's a job thing.

Job? You feel guilty of your job? I'm just going to be straight with you. I was hired by that person, the person who has passed away, her family, to be a professional mourner at the event. Wait, what? A what? A professional mourner. Say that slower. Say that slower.

I was hired by that person's family to be a professional mourner at the event. What? Okay, now say it even slower. Actually, speed it up a little. Let's get it right in the middle. You didn't know the person who died at the funeral? No, I've never met her before. Oh!

What? Why did they meet you? So why did you get emotional? She said you got emotional when you guys were on the walk and you brought her up. Professional mourner. He's paid to cry. Good at his job. That's essentially it. I am paid up. Professional mourner. He's paid to cry. Good at his job. That's essentially it.

I am paid to be a mourner there. What happens is I go to things like this, to a funeral, and I'm an actor. I become emotional. Why would people want that at a funeral, though? It's like, Grandma wasn't that well-loved. Can somebody cry for her? I don't get it.

She said it was a super tiny funeral. Maybe this makes sense. You might want one of these for your funeral. Let's just keep this guy's number. I'm forcing you to cry. I'll be a professional laugher at your funeral, Brooke. That is a good question, though. Why do people hire you? What's the point?

Sometimes it just makes the place look fuller. Sometimes people are less self-conscious about getting emotional if there's already someone there doing it. I'm kind of like an icebreaker okay i mean for like a you know emotionally closed off family that kind of makes sense yeah so back to why you called i i really don't want to tell her why i was there i mean i was paid to be there and it feels strange to tell her now you know yeah you know you don't have to beat yourself up trying to figure out how to tell her because you kind of already did yeah wait wait so you

actually get paid to cry at strangers funeral yeah hey that's julia yeah, I got that. Okay. Dude! Pretty quickly. We'll just let you guys talk. Oh, my gosh. Listen, I mean, you heard it. Essentially, yeah, I am paid to cry there, but it's not just crying sometimes. I'll, like, I've given a speech before. I've been a pallbearer.

I mean, I guess I just sort of lucked out. I didn't realize one of my job perks was meeting folks as we bury the dead, but there you go. Wow. Julia, I mean, how are you feeling hearing all that? I guess I just thought you were this really

sensitive person that was feeling your emotions and then just to find out that it's all just a big game. I don't know. I know it's super weird. a big game. It's I don't know. I'm kind of. I know. I know.

It's super weird. I know. I was weird when I first got hired. But my feelings for you are real. The second time I cried with you in the park. Remember that? That was real. When you guys kissed?

You brought the real emotion out of me. And that's why I kissed you. But you cried because I brought up the person that passed. So all you did was just, you were like primed to be triggered by that to cry. So how can I trust like anything when like, I know that you're preparing yourself for a reaction? I mean, do you trust a dentist to not scrub your teeth when he's not at work? You know what I mean?

Work is work, you know? Okay, that was a weird analogy, but you got somewhere. I see, okay, yeah. He's able to leave it at home. I mean, he sounds sincere. Were you gonna call her? I wanted to, yeah.

I just, I didn't know how to say it. I was trying to figure it out. He's in a tough position, didn't he? I want to believe you at this point, Rick. And I feel like at this point, I might cry if you guys don't go out together on another date.

What does that say about me as a radio host? It's not cute when you do it. I'll cry with you. Do you want me to cry with you? We would love to send you on a date. You crying is making me laugh. Are you sure you want me to cry with you? Do you want me to cry with you? We would love to send you on a date. Please. You crying is making me laugh. Stop. We're paying for the date.

Are you sure you want a sensitive guy? Are you sure you want a sensitive guy? I'm just being in the room with Jeffrey. I'm just saying. Seriously, Rick, are you up for seeing Julia? Because it sounded like you were genuinely into her. Yeah. Yeah, without a doubt.

Aw. Now the question is, Julia, are you still interested in going out with Rick again after what you heard? No, I think I have to pass. No, Julia. I'm sorry. What a terrible radio host. You are. No one feels bad for you.

I can't make this happen. I can't make this happen. I can't make anything happen. This is pathetic. I got a gig next Tuesday I can't go to if you want to fill in for me. Oh, God. I'll be there. Someone's going to be like, is that young Jeffrey? Is that young Jeffrey?

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. John Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else.

Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.