Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Down In The Dumps

Episode Date: October 4, 2024

It’s SHOCKING to learn where the listener on the phone met a new love interest today, and it’s even more shocking that he somehow swung that interaction into a date! Hear the where, why and how coming up in an all new Second Date Podcast! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Second date update. I feel like we hear this a lot from our male listeners. What's that? Telling us about how hard it is to be a dude on the dating apps.

Yeah. Because you can match with 40 women, send out 40 messages, and never hear a word back from any of them. I mean, how many times can you write sup girl and nobody responds? That is so disappointing, Jeff. That's a lot of letters to type, Brooke. Or do what I do and send a bunch of gifs and be super funny on the show. None of it works.

Obviously, it's easy to blame Brooke for this. Because we all know if she was still single and on the dating app, she'd be messaging back every dude who even glanced at her profile. Dude, Brooke, you would have been a problem. Honest to God, would not have had time for a full-time job if the dating apps had been around when I was single. Because she is a charity dater and a generous one. That is correct, Jeff.

I see the good in everybody. Apparently, there's another option out there for single men to consider that's even better than the apps. And that's where our listener, Caleb, is at right now. So, Caleb, welcome to the show. Hey, thank you, guys. Wait, like, is at as in it's a physical place? Not really sure. He just said he found another option, an alternative to the dating apps that he likes even better.

So, Caleb, I really am interested to find out what you're doing right now. Okay. Well, a little bit of backstory is I started off on dating apps. And, yeah, it is a real challenge for guys. I heard, like, 1% of guys match with anybody. What? Only 1% of men get matches. Wow.

It's higher than I would have thought so it's still That's pretty wild if it's true whether or not it is true. I have to tell you that's my experience So I realized okay. I just got to get out in the real world So a couple of weeks ago, I found this TV on Craigslist Looked like it was in really good shape. Okay. And I bought it. And you bought a TV. Yep. Needed to be cleaned up. Took it home. Turned out it was an Arby's digital menu.

Oh, I've seen this happen before. Wait, what? I don't get it. So you know when they print, like, when you go into an Arby's and the menu is on a flat screen. After, like, six years, they just sell them and they get rid of them because they're old TVs. Oh, they're not actually TV screens? They're like, they can only show the Arby's menu?

It's burnt into them now. Oh, they look like an Arby's menu? Yeah, it's burnt into the screen. So no matter what you're watching, you can still kind of see the outline of the Arby's menu over the top of it. Can you still smell the Arby's that seeped into the electronics? God, I just want a number two so bad right now. Arby's needs screensavers. No.

But most restaurants, like J-Box does this too. That makes sense. They just sell them after a while. So now you're watching Arby's. The heck I am. I tried contacting the guy again because I wanted to get my money back. He completely blocked me, of course. Yes.

You got hustled, bro. So I was so pissed, I decided to get my money back. He completely blocked me, of course. Yes. You got to hustle, bro. So I was so pissed, I decided to take this thing. I didn't even want to send it out of the curb. I actually took it to the dump where it belonged. Okay. Nice. Okay. While I was there, it turns out,

there's this lovely young woman right there who is... What? Well, hello. Shut up. Dumpster girl. Your big hack is to meet women at the dumpster. Landfill. Shut up. Your big hack is to meet women at the dump. Look it, you can't argue with results. Okay.

Yeah. That's a good dating hack, I guess. Meeting women. I'm assuming she's just visiting the dump and she doesn't live there. Yeah. Or she's a hoarder. Uh-oh. No, no.

She was quite lovely. Good. Okay. How do you strike up a conversation with her? Like, man, nice garbage. Actually, she asked me, why are you throwing away this brand new television? Oh. That is a combo starter.

You got a big flat screen. Dude, when my mom goes to the dump, she often brings stuff home. No. I'm not even lying. I didn't know this was like a free-for-all. I'm going to go. Oh, yeah. You can take anything you want back. People love it. People, like, literally go there and get free stuff. No. Oh, really? I didn't know this was like a free-for-all. I'm going to go. Oh, yeah. You can take anything

you want back. People love it. People like literally go there and get free stuff. Okay. So you like gave her your old TV? Oh, no.

I wasn't going to let anybody have that. But once she asked about it, that was my opening to tell her the story. Yes. Okay. She thought it was

just completely hilarious. Oh. It is, bro. Dude, you love a woman who will laugh at your pain, right? Yeah. Oh, he's still laughing. But then she also needed some help, so then I started helping her at the outer trucks.

And we ended up just really connecting. So I got her number. Wait, is the dump the only date? Because then you were being used. It was a dump date. Yeah. No, not at all. No, no.

I got her number and I called her after, so. Good. So you went out. Did you take her to Arby's? That would have been funny. That would have been funny. Well, if we went to Arby's, I would have known exactly what I wanted. Yeah.

That's so funny. Where'd you go? We went out just for a couple of drinks. Yeah. And oh my gosh, she is so cool. She's great, bro. Yeah, she's basically the first person I met in real life in like the last decade. Oh my gosh.

What? You mean that you can go out with, like you've come in contact with other humans. Sounds like you have a room full of dolls. He's like just staring at the Arby's TV. So you had a great time. Oh, we did. Oh my goodness. She cleaned up so nice.

She cleaned up so nice. I mean, I will say if you're attracted to a woman in her dump attire, you're going to find her hot. Like hot, hot. Yeah.

It sounds like it's the first woman that he's like spoken to in 10 years. He does sound like the hermit that crawled out of the basement. It's a pretty low bar. You can say all you want. All I'm going to say is I was at the dump getting rid of something and I managed to get a cute woman's phone number.

So that is something to brag. So you thought that there would be another hangout when you guys were done with drinks and everything? I really thought so. I mean, it's not like the Craigslist guy who just completely blocked me. You know, she's still responding. Okay. I just need you guys to help me out. And seeing as she's willing to go out with me again, it doesn't seem like it.

Okay. Well, we want to step in and help you out we'll come back we're going to call this garbage gal and see if we can get her to agree landfill queen whatever it is we'll hopefully get her to answer and get you a second date update right after this thank you second date update you know c Caleb was just on with us telling us how hard of a time he's been having matching online with women in his area. And if the call doesn't go well today, I do have an alternative option for him. Oh, you do? Because I saw a news article where South Korea is offering foreign men $36,000 cash to move there and marry a local woman.

Wait, do you only get the money after the marriage? Well, the money plus they'll give you all the used Arby TV screens that you can handle. And dude, South Korean Arby's are the best. Oh, I can imagine. I actually believe that. They would have the Korean barbecue Arby's. Oh my God, that sounds so good. But before Caleb considers

moving continents, he did meet a woman here in real life. And Brooke, you're probably the best person to say how it happened since your parents conceived you at the dump, so tell his story. Dude, we call that the Dufort Mall where I'm from. It's not even a lie.

No, they met at the dump. That's kind of the end of the story there. What did you want me to add to it? You romanticized it so well, Brooke. Thank you. Yeah, I mean, she was hauling stuff. He was hauling stuff. They were both throwing things into the big pile.

Bottom line is he was able to turn that meetup into a first date officially, but after that, she's been kind of avoidant. Yeah. And Caleb, did we miss anything there? Was that romantic enough for you? I felt like it was a little more romantic, but yeah.

Did you reach over and take the smudged dirt off of her face in the middle of the landfill? But added his own because he's also at the landfill? Wait a second. That's not dirt. Ew! Was that a diaper you were holding? Oh, no. Well, this is getting more romantic.

Yeah. It's getting hot in here, guys. Let's just call Rebecca for you. Before I keep going. Yeah, because we could go all day with this. I'm just going to dial her number right now. Oh, thank you very much. Okay. Now shut up and let me talk.

Here we go. Hello? Hey, is this Rebecca? Yes. Hi. My name is Jeff from a radio show called Broken Jeffrey in the morning. I got it down there. Oh, I don't know, but that sounds okay, I guess.

Wow. That's exactly the best description of it. Okay. Hi, Rebecca. The whole show is here. Good morning. We've all been wanting to talk to you. Well, I kind of don't like to be on public radio, but...

No, this isn't public radio. Brooke listens to that trash. Yeah. Definitely commercial radio. Yeah. We're doing a segment here, Rebecca. It's called a Second Date Update, and we're trying to help out one of our listeners

reconnect with you after you've gone out once before. His name is Caleb. Oh, Caleb. Yes. Yes. Oh, my God. I'm dying to hear your, like, meet cute story. Well, I'm pretty sure we know the story, Brooke, because.

I know we know the story, but I want to hear what she thought when she saw him at the dump. Like, that's so unexpected. I actually really liked him he seemed so interesting and okay when you're at the dump or when you guys were at drinks he was so interesting like both places like even at the dump like me he seemed interesting and then i was like i don't really go out with men that I meet at the dump. Well, that's refreshing. Thank God.

I don't know. I bet there's a lot of them, though. But let's just back things up for you, Rebecca, because here's what we know from Caleb. He told us the story and said, you two met at the dump. You had a connection there, talked about used TVs and whatnot. And then he ended up asking you out and you went out for drinks and had a connection there talked about used tvs and whatnot and then he ended up asking you out you went out for drinks and had a nice time together that we did okay he said he was so impressed with how cool you were like i thought that was a really nice compliment that is really

nice and like i was like that at first too i totally Okay, so clearly something has changed, at least on your end since your meetup. Could you maybe help us understand what that would be so we could pass the information to him? Because he's totally confused. So after my date with Caleb, the next day I went on

the dating app and guess who I see? I see Caleb. Oh, you didn't let us guess oh okay his profile came up what why is that weird i feel like you just match and then you're like hey yeah fancy seeing you here if anything it could be a sign that he popped up for you yeah even the algorithm wants you to be together that's true guys yeah i thought it was so great because then I would be able to find out more about him. Yeah. I just kept on reading about him and reading more and more.

Yeah. And the more I read about him, it's just like the more boring he seems like. He just doesn't come up. Wait, were his thoughts boring answers? I mean, you know, the branded answers like, I go to the gym, I love exercising. But why would that matter? I don't understand. You've already gone out with him.

You know what he's like in real life. And it also explains why he was having such a hard time on the dating apps. He has a terrible profile. Yeah, I don't match with anyone that does serious answers. I like the funny. Excuse me, my profile is not horrible. Oh. Oh. That's the insult that you've got. Okay.

Well, Caleb was supposed to wait, but I guess I need to tell you, Rebecca, that that's Caleb on the other line. He's been listening to this conversation. What a not boring thing to do. Well, yeah, he's assertive. Yeah, he is. Wow. You know, Caleb, I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry, but I don't understand how he worried about my profile when we went out on like one and a half weeks. That doesn't make any sense. I'm not sure I understand what's going on here. Your boring

profile, it just stuck with me. Oh, no. What was the most boring part of it? We probably shouldn't recap it. I don't know. I think we want to bring it back up. It was just so branded. It was like the same thing. Like, that guy's always

saying, oh, I go to the gym. You sing jam. Yeah, I mean, I think that's like a generic thing that people just want to be mass appeal. I'm in shape. You want jam? That's a good, that's attractive. Yeah, I mean, I think that's, like, a generic, like, thing that people just want to, like, be mass appeal. You want personality, not just hotness. Hey, guys, I'm still here. Everyone's talking about my crappy profile. I'm right here.

I don't think you should take offense to it. Like, my husband has, like, this one really cute guy friend, and his dating profile makes him look like a total loser. Honestly. But in real life, he's awesome. And maybe that's you. Yeah, I mean, I've heard of people, like, not wanting to go out before the date because of a boring profile. But not after. No, it doesn't make sense.

You should know him by this point, Rebecca. Like, you've hung out with him. Yeah, were you bored when you hung out? No. Okay. That's funny. You see how that's funny? Yeah, you see bored when you hung out? No. Okay. That's funny. You see how that's funny? Yeah, you see the disconnect, right?

Yeah. You know, it's just the last thing that stuck with me. It really was. It's like burned into your brain. It's burned in like the Arby's menu on that TV screen. You just can't get rid of it. You're perfect for each other if you don't even know it. Yeah.

I mean, we need to step back. I think we're jumping in too much let's re-establish the connection that you two had with each other caleb talk to rebecca and light that spark back up rebecca this is so backwards from the way this kind of thing always happens we met in person were together. We had a great time together. Both times that we saw each other. And then the last thing we did was see my profile and decide you don't want to see me. Come on, sweetie. Come on, Rebecca.

Sweetie? Oh, God. Did you say sweetie a lot inside of your profile? I'm looking for my sweetie. Now I'm on her side. It's kind of a boring response. We're running out of time here. At this point, I just have to

offer Rebecca, we'll send you out one more time with Caleb and we'll pay for the date. I'm having such a hard time with that. Don't look at his profile before you answer. Just go off of what's in your heart right now. I can't get over it. I just can't

get over it. Are you kidding me? Are you serious? That is so funny. The dating app screwed me. I didn't even meet you on the dating app. I think you need to go delete that profile. You just need to live at the dump from now on. But don't forget South Korea wants you.

$36,000. Start a family over there. Tag us in your pictures of Arby's in South Korea because I want to see what they have on the menu. You know, I know you guys are joking, but I am seriously considering it. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. How many people

do you think heard this and went right onto their dating profiles and started making alterations to sound less boring? I think they just paused it. Took it off. I don't know how you make it sound sexier. Like, I don't work out. I'm a professional calorie incinerator.

That'd actually be funny. I mean, honestly, that would be more attractive. I already say that on my bio. It's called foodies. I do think. I just say big foodie. I mean, who would have thought a meet cute at a city dump would not work out? I actually did.

I actually thought that this was going to be a home run. Really? Yes. I know. I've never been to a dump, but now I want to go. They're pretty fun, but the smell is overwhelming. It's wild. Yeah.

You're never going to know what that person smells like until you get them out of that area. That could work to your benefit, though. Maybe do a little speed dating event at a city dump, Alexis. Organize one. I'll just sit in the trunk of my car. But I get it. The dating world can feel like you're in a dump, so if you want some help getting pulled

out of it, email the show. We'll call the person who's not calling you back. And go check out all of our second dates wherever you get your podcasts at Brooke and Jeffrey. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning john stewart is back in the host chair at the daily show which means he's also back in our ears on the daily show ears edition podcast join late night legend john stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines exclusive extended interviews and more now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show, ears edition on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.