Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Facebook KO

Episode Date: September 22, 2025

The listener in today’s Second Date Update says that if we can’t help him, it’ll be the first time EVER that he’s been rejected by a woman! The high stakes call is happening in the podcast!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey, everybody, this is Matt Rogers. And Bowen-Yang. And you're never going to guess who's our guest on Las Culturistas. It is Elle Woods, Tracy Flick, herself. Reese Witherspoon. Louise, it must go in a girl's trip. I have to have a tequila. We must.

Oh! Whoever said orange is the new pink. We seriously disturbs. Listen to Las Culturistas on the I-HeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. I just normally do straight stand-up, but this is a bit different. What do you get when a true crime producer walks into a comedy club? Answer, a new podcast called Wisecrack, where a comedian finds himself at the center of a chilling true crime story.

Does anyone know what show they've come to see? It's a story. It's about the scariest night of my life. This is Wisecrack, available now. Listen to Wisecrack on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Jorge Ramos. And I'm Paola Ramos. Together we're launching The Moment, a new podcast about what it means to live through a time as uncertain as this one.

We sit down with politicians, artists and activists to bring you death and analysis from a unique Latino perspective. The Moment is a space for the conversations we've been having us, father and daughter, for years. Listen to The Moment with Jorge Ramos and Paola Ramos on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On a cold January day in 1995, 18-year-old Krista Pike killed 19-year-old Colleen Slemmer in the woods of Knoxville, Tennessee. Since her conviction, Krista has been sitting on death row. How does someone prove that they deserve to live? We are starting the recording now. Please state your first and last name.

Krista Pike. Listen to Unrestorable Season 2, Proof of Life. on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Introducing IVF disrupted, the Kind Body story, a podcast about a company that promised to revolutionize fertility care. It grew like a tech startup. While Kind Body did help women start families, it also left behind a stream of disillusioned and angry patients. You think you're finally, like, in the right hands. You're just not.

Listen to Ivy F Disrupted, the Kind Body Story, on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning, and we've got a brand new second day podcast. It's start off your week. Thank you so much for being here. And the guy in today's second date has, is it a hobby? Is it a passion? Both? It's both. It's a passion hobby.

I didn't know it existed. No. Me either. And I'm not sure how I feel about it. Yeah. It reminds me of a guy I follow on Instagram. That's all I'll say. Okay, all right.

It's very niche, and you're going to hear it in just a second. I hope you enjoy today's second date. And we'd love to always go over the comments. We had so many people flood our comments that they just want longer episodes, which was so kind over the weekend. Because we want to know what you love about Saturday so much. Yeah, yeah, totally. That's it.

And yeah, gosh, Tosh said, if laughter is the best medicine, then Brooke and Jeffrey are basically my 24-hour pharmacy, which is great because politics give me hives. And honestly, the longer the episodes, the better my chances of surviving the day. There is. Now, as a doctor, I am a medical doctor, don't overdose on us either.

You don't want to laugh too much. We have side effects. For sure. Yeah, we definitely cause some stomach issues. Yeah, and brain cell losses. Yeah. Lossage is totally a word, too. See?

It's working. Yeah. Or it's not working? I don't know. We need to get to this new episode. It's starting right now. Second date update. I'm calling it right now.

We're going to put one up in the L column today. Hey, okay. L for love. Oh, I was like excited and then I realized it wasn't a W. No, L for love. I don't know anything about the listener who emailed us. The date he went on or the person they want us to call, but I just have this feeling deep down that by the end of this segment,

it's going to be love one, crippling loneliness, zero. That's right. Love needs a win. Jeff, let's go. Because our listener, Danny, definitely needs some. Some loving. Danny, welcome to the show. You ready for a big L today? Yeah, I'm ready for a big W.

Okay. No, he's a L. We need to give you some L. I like Danny. Thank you. I appreciate you. Okay. I'm not to even hear you. He knows for just kidding.

I will say Jeff came pretty aggressive with that L. Oh, I'm sorry that I'm confident about this call. But he's trying to change the L into love. This is all not messed up for you, Jeff. Sorry. That's all right. Let's get back on track here, Danny. So let's start at the beginning.

Tell us about the person you want us to call. today. Yeah, guys, I met this nice young lady by the name of Jessica. I was at Whole Foods. I usually meet most of my, you know, higher class women at Whole Foods. Well, look at that. Oh. Well. So wait, when you said Jessica was a nice lady, you mean like looks-wise nice or she was actually a nice person when you talked to it? All the whole shabang. Nice. Oh. Hey. Okay, so all the quality ladies are at Whole Paycheck, huh? Whole paycheck. Do you not call it that? I thought everybody. heard that. That's really funny. I thought everybody called it back. Because you spend your whole paycheck

when you go. I totally get it. Yeah. All the one percenters at least. Oh, yeah. I don't even shop there really. A splurge once a month on a box there. Yeah. All right. So tell us how you met. Like, how did this interaction in the whole foods go down with Jessica? Yeah, so I was walking through and I normally, as I mentioned, meet a lot of nice women. I'm not scared to talk to strangers. So I saw her and complimented on her her style and her hair. It's kept it simple. Oh, that's nice. say that's some nice hair you got how do you how do you compliment can I have a piece of it

yeah yeah after I complimented her I asked her for IG because that's the thing new days yeah yeah and that feels safe like that feels like you are in tune with people's boundaries yeah all right so what did she say she said no oh did you actually go on a day with her or well I was surprised she actually ended up giving me her number Oh, you can't have my Instagram, but you can have my phone number because I never actually answer that. That's interesting. Or it gives her the option to block you quicker. Or to give a fake number.

Exactly. Power move by her, but I'm assuming that wasn't the case. You know, it's old school, and I like old school. So I ended up giving her a call. Oh, you actually called. You didn't even text. Yeah, so I invited her to a nice, fancy, high-end barb. And I figured she was enjoying herself because we were talking.

talking for a couple hours. That's a great sign. Like, what were you guys connecting over? We talked about everything. I remember us talking about travel and where we both wanted to go. We've never been to Iceland, so we talked about going to Iceland. Oh, in the pools or whatever they're called, what do they call, Brooks? Hot Springs.

Okay. So you guys are sharing. Things are going good. What type of vibe are you getting from her? I'm, you know, getting a good vibe. I'm picking up the receptive kind of vibe from her. She did at one point start to talk about. a trip to Mexico where she got balked off of the horse she was riding, and I laughed.

Oh. You laughed? Yeah, she got offended. Oh, no. She's telling a serious story about a horse injury. Well, maybe she was like, yeah, I broke my back. I thought that would be a funny story, too. Yeah, I don't know.

That's what I thought to. I must have read her wrong. You know, I apologized and I said I thought you were joking, and we were able to get past it. Okay. So that's the one moment that stood out to you. is like kind of being off. Yeah. There was one thing that I said about a weird hobby

that maybe might have rubbed her the wrong way. I collect vintage maps. Oh, that's kind of cool. How would a vintage map rub her the wrong way? She hates when countries aren't currently labeled what they're actually called. Oh, yeah. It's not labeled Iceland yet.

Czechoslovakia? That doesn't exist anymore. Maybe it sounded more like an old person hobby to her. I don't know. Oh, okay. Rubbed her the wrong way as and turned her off. is what you're saying. Yeah, it turned her off. People say that about stamp collecting and I still think it's cool. You know? Point proven there. I mean, it's not far off from old maps.

You're not kidding. So how long has it been since that date? Yeah, it's been two weeks since our date and I haven't been in contact with her at all. I'm not sure what transpired because I'm not a guy that normally just goes on one date and not another. You know what I mean? You usually get another date. Yeah, yeah. Well, you sound. I mean, it sounds like you listen and you take interest in the person. Like, that alone will usually get you another night. And you guys can't even see me. I consider myself a pretty good-looking dude.

Okay. So we got a catch here. I'm going to hear it through the phone, though. A little bit of attractive qualities going on up there. The good news is you had some setbacks, but you got back on that metaphorical horse when it bucked you off. Don't use that. What, okay. We'll save the horse metaphors and put them in.

Oh, you got it now. In the stable. We'll put it back in the stable before we call Jessica for you and try to get you your second date update right after this, okay? Thank you, you guys for your help. All right, hold on. Second date update. We've been talking to Danny and learned Danny likes himself a classy gal.

Okay, Danny. Because he met Jessica in a Whole Foods. Hello, Bougie. Took her to an upstale cocktail bar. Okay, Swanky. and talked about traveling the world with her. Hello luxury. And he did suffer a small setback

after she shared a personal story about getting thrown off a horse in Mexico and Danny laughed at that. I thought it would have been appropriate laughter time too. Yeah. Anytime Brooke shares a personal story, we all burst into laughter.

Yeah. I mean, people's misery is funny. Right? Yeah, Brooke's story, it's like, I bucked a horse off of my back. It was hilarious. But aside from that, he felt very confident

that he would be seeing her again, which brings us to this moment two weeks later where he's hearing nothing. So, Danny, before we call her, how are you feeling about this? I'm still in shock because I'm never one and done. I'm always getting to return favors after the first date. Wait, weird way to word it.

But I like it. If she says no, will it be the first time you've been rejected? Very first. Whoa. Ever? Welcome to the club. I had a friend who was a model, and I was there for the first time he was ever rejected. Was it hard for him?

It really was. I know you're joking. But truly, you could see in his eyes. He's like, how is this even a possibility? So I hope that doesn't happen to you today, bro. But if it does and you want to hug afterwards or exchange favors, whatever you like to do after you days, like we're there for you. It's just sliding in right now. No, he's the one that brought up favors first.

Yeah, I'm trying to speak his language. So bottom line, we're there for you, Danny. I appreciate you. We appreciate you. We're going to show you after the call, but let's call Jessica first. Here we go. That's all fair. Hello? Hey, is this Jessica? Yes. Who's calling? Hey, Jessica. We are a radio show calling you. We're called Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

Yeah, sorry if you're busy right now. Why is there a radio station calling me? We're bored. Part of that, but mostly because we do this segment on the show that's called the second date update, where we help out our listeners who've gone out with someone and they're not getting a call back for a second meetup. What? Don't you want to know who wrote us about you? Yeah.

A guy named Danny. Ugh. What? I heard the G. I know. Why that reaction? Well, we just don't connect, so I don't know. This is weird to me.

Really? That is so strange. It sounds like he was a really nice guy who was really interested in you. Easy to talk to? Because we spoke to him before calling you. And he told us about the date from his description. It seems to have a lot of really nice moments between you two, where you vived, got to know each other. No, I feel like he is a kind of person that would have.

have a challenge to find any match with any woman. This is weird. Okay, okay. You have to explain why he was so off-putting because I don't know if he just like pulled one over on us, but he sounded fine. Nice. It sounded kind of like swaff almost. Yeah, the absolute opposite. I don't know.

He's crazy. I mean, I mean, I mean, what? Can you like walk us through the date in your eyes? We need something specific that gave you that impression. I mean, I thought things were going okay, but once I started to dig deeper, I found out some things that just kind of turned me off. Wait, like things in your conversation that he revealed or? Yeah, like what? Yeah.

Well, we were talking about hobbies, and then he said he was into boxing, and I was like, oh, that's really cool. You spar at the gym, and he was like, no, I spar in parking lot. Oh, parking lot Oh, like street boxing? Maybe like fight club style. Is that what he means? Did you ask more? Yeah, I did.

I was like with random people and he said no over Facebook arguments. What? Oh, nice. He gets in fights with people on Facebook and then meets him in parking lots. Red flags everywhere. I guess so. I mean, I got out of there as soon as I could because it was starting to freak me out. Yeah.

I guess he was very. proud of this hobby that he had and I was just like I really hate violence and also like what do you expect me to go out with somebody who hits people right and he's his Facebook that actively yeah exactly I mean that's so messed up and like boxing's a sport this isn't a sport I picture him meeting like 50 plus year old people in parking lots and yeah sure but maybe that's just our understanding of it maybe he has a totally different thing that he does and we're just interpreting it the wrong way How could you interpret that the wrong way? Well, let's ask him because I need to tell you, Jessica, he's on the other line right now listening to this conversation, wanting to talk to you.

He's not on the phone. Yeah, see, there he is. I didn't know you felt that way. You should have said something, you know? What? That's kind of threatening. Like, you get so upset at Facebook comments that you have to beat people up over them? Well, hold on.

That's how we're interpreting. What do you actually do? Explain it, Daney. Jessica, you're getting this all wrong. I'm actually doing the neighborhood a favor by dealing with these Facebook trolls one at a time in person in their driveway. What? You go to their home? Oh, it's a driveway.

Wait, what defines a Facebook troll? People that come on there and talk a bunch of crap. Aren't they usually like either teenagers or really, really old people? Or they get paid for engagement. I troll all day long. I make a lot of money. I'll be careful. Danny might try to engage you in a parking lot sometimes.

Hey, man, if it's mutual, that's one thing. Listen, I don't go looking for them. I engage them online. If they want to meet up, man and man, square up. I usually offer a place like a Costco parking lot, and then we meet up. Okay, neutral grounds. But also, like, Jessica, Facebook trolls do kind of suck. I mean...

Now that you've heard his side of the story, does it make you feel a little bit better about it? No. Okay. Which part of it don't you like? I mean, I couldn't picture my boyfriend saying, hey, I got to leave early tonight. I have to go beat someone up at the Home Depot parking lot. Listen, Jessica, what I'm doing is a lot cheaper than therapy.

That's true. Probably less effective, but yeah. Well, therapy for you or is it therapy for the trolls? Yeah, maybe both. Definitely for me, I'm so much more Zen, like, after I knock someone out. They're kind of at peace, too. For a few seconds until they regain consciousness. I had a really good friend that struggled with depression,

and he got into jiu-jitsu, is that kind of the same thing? Kids with anger management are supposed to go into boxing, too. Absolutely. It's a form of physical therapy. You guys are acting like this is a chaotic brawl. This is a gentleman sport. We stick hands after. Sometimes we might crack a beer if I have one in it.

Yeah, that's how it should be. How many Facebook trolls have you fought? That's a good question, actually. I have lost count at this point. Oh, God. Or he's got brain damage. You can only count to 10 right now. I got some names from my people.

page, I could send him. I'll take them on if they meet me. I'll do it. Hey. Sounds like a full-time job, not a hobby. Text in, 7-8-5-9-2. You want to find our friend? I'm just kidding. So if I'm reading the room right here, it sounds like Jessica is still feeling a little

bit cold on this idea of Facebook parking lot brawls. So, Janie, is there any last things that you want to say to her before we ask the question? I just want to let her know that I met her. with her ex-boyfriend last week at home deep. Wait, excuse me? That's a joke. It's a joke, but I would do it.

Oh, okay. He's got a sense of humor. In all seriousness, I'm a good dude. You want to hang out with me. You just don't know yet. Oh. And I'll protect you. That's for sure.

I did not like that middle sentence. That being said, we would like to offer to send you on another date with Danny, and we would pay for it, Jessica, but it's up to you. I'm sure he'll have no jealousy issues once you guys start dating. No, I'm not interested Okay

Oh man, we thought we had her, right? It was so close I felt it almost ready to say yes But not this time We got a solution though For the broken Jeffrey Facebook trolls So that's cool Oh yeah

Are you available for hire Danny? Yes, I am And Jessica Just so you know I'm not sorry that I laughed At you've fallen off of the horse Oh Unnecessary

But he will beat up that horse In a Walmart parking lot To get even for you That's not the whores I'm so stupid Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning Hey everybody, this is Matt Rogers And Bowen Yang

And you're never going to guess Who's our guest on Lost Cultureistas It is Bradley Jackson Elle Woods, Tracy Flick herself Reese Witherspoon It must go in a girls' trip I have to have a tequila We must

The Q rating When they run diagnoses. We can run it on you guys. I'd be scared. Run the Q rating. No, on the Q rating on us. My resiliency score is down to adequate because we were on a red eye. My resiliency score.

My grit. I got to get my grit score up. Now, don't think that you're going to come out Los Culture East. That's the podcast. And we're not going to at least bring up Big Little Lies season three. Whoever said orange is the new page. We seriously disturbs. Listen to Las Culturistas on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I'm Jorge Ramos. And I'm Paola Ramos. Together we're launching The Moment, a new podcast about what it means to live through a time, as uncertain as this one. We sit down with politicians. I would be the first immigrant mayor in generations, but 40% of New Yorkers were born outside of this country. Artists and activists, I mean, do you ever feel... demoralized. I might personally lose hope. This individual might lose the faith, but there's an institution that doesn't lose faith. And that's what I believe in. To bring you depth and analysis

from a unique Latino perspective. There's not a single day that Paola and I don't call or text each other sharing news and thoughts about what's happening in the country. This new podcast will be a way to make that ongoing intergenerational conversation public. Listen to the moment with Jorge Ramos and Paola Ramos as part of the MyCultura Podcast Network on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Look, I get it. On the surface, fighting randos off of Facebook seems barbaric. But they're agreeing to meet up with him.

Yeah, that's my point. He's not surprising them with a fight. Hunting him down. And according to Danny, they even shake hands and sometimes grab beers together afterwards. As a fight should end. I'm really, like, wavering on this one. back and forth. I don't know. It's like to describe it as a hobby is kind of the strange point. Well, yeah, sure. But maybe this face-to-face stuff and not hiding behind computers and saying terrible

things to each other all day long, maybe that's actually a healthy thing for the entire world. Usually once it gets to that point, what I notice on Facebook, people just block people. It's like, oh, where do you live? I'm going to, it's like, man, get out of here. So the fact the other guy's like, sure, show up. Okay, show up. All right. Or just get off Facebook or social media. But then we're not resolving our issues, a lot. Lexus. Like if it was, if it was me, I would personally do it a little different. I'd meet him outside

of Barnes and Noble and we'd do a thumb wrestle. I like that, Jeff. You know, but I's even older than the Facebook. What about a tickle fight? I'm open for that too. But I do understand what he's doing, what he's trying to accomplish. I'm a little bit disappointed that Jessica wasn't able to look deeper than just his

fist flying through a Costco rumble. But remember, you can always find all of our second dates wherever you get your podcast and be careful what you write in the comments because Danny's watching. So be extra nice to Brooke and there. Danny's watching. You'll find it at Brooke and Jeffrey.

Hey, everybody. This is Matt Rogers. And Bowen Yeang. And you're never going to guess who's our guest on Los Culturistas. It is Elle Woods' Tracy Flick herself. Reese Witherspoon. Louise, it must go in a girl's trip. I have to have a tequila.

We must. Oh. Whoever said orange is the new pink. We seriously disturbs. Listen to Lost Culture on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I just normally do straight stand-up, but this is a bit different. What do you get when a true crime producer walks into a comedy club?

Answer, a new podcast called Wisecrack, where a comedian finds himself at the center of a chilling true crime story. Does anyone know what show they've come to see? It's a story. It's about the scariest night of my life. This is Wisecrack, available now. Listen to Wisecrack on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Jorge Ramos. And I'm Paola Ramos.

Together we're launching The Moment, a new podcast about what it means to live through a time as uncertain as this one. We sit down with politicians, artists, and activists to bring you death and analysis from a unique Latino perspective. The moment is a space for the conversations we've been having us, father and daughter, for years. Listen to The Moment with Jorge Ramos and Paola Ramos on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On a cold January day in 1995, 18-year-old Krista Pike killed 19-year-old Colleen Slemmer in the woods of Knoxville, Tennessee. Since her conviction, Krista has been sitting on death row.

How does someone prove that they deserve to live? We are starting the recording now. Please state your first and last name. Krista Pike. Listen to Unrestorable Season 2, Proof of Life, on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Introducing IVF disrupted, the Kind Body story, a podcast about a company that promised to revolutionize fertility care. It grew like a tech startup. While Kind Body did help women start families,

It also left behind a stream of disillusioned and angry patience. You think you're finally, like, in the right hands. You're just not. Listen to IVF Disrupted, the Kind Body Story, on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.