Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Fran Fiction

Episode Date: May 3, 2023

The woman in today’s Second Date might have divulged a little TOO MUCH when she was asked about her career… and while her answer was 100% true… he’s 100% not calling her back…See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now plus you'll get special content just for podcast listeners like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines listen on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts second date update we got an email from one of our listeners named Fran who said she dates a lot.

Okay. Probably more than the average person, according to her. Was that a brag? Well, I don't know if that's a brag if you're having to go out with lots and lots and lots of people. It's like the opposite problem with being alone. But she says after 35 dates over the last six months, she thinks she finally found a guy who doesn't totally repulse her.

Hey, that's good. So her bar's very high. Well, and now he's not calling her back. What? No. The repulsor becomes the repulsee. And she's on the phone right now. Fran, I love you. You disgust me.

Welcome to the show. Hey, how are you guys? I feel like you're proof that when people say, you just got to put yourself out there, that it doesn't actually always work. Yeah, you put yourself out there a lot. For years and years and years. Yeah, you poor thing.

Tell us about the guy that you recently met. Okay, so I met this guy through the way we always hate meeting people, online dating. Yeah, for sure. His name is Tommy. Okay. He was so handsome.

And, you know, but you see a ton of people online that are attractive and you kind of don't think anything of it. But I looked through his photos and he had this one photo of him with two cats that were his cats. It was really sweet because guys are always posting photos of like dogs or like when they're fishing and all this other stuff. And it was just really sweet to see something that wasn't that.

He posted a totally different animal. This guy is a keeper. I don't know. Yeah, cat guy. It just screams. He's sensitive. He's in tune. He's not like there's no toxic masculinity stuff happening there.

Oh, like if it was a tiger cat, that would be a red flag. A house cat. Red flag. That's a green one. So, you know, we had some really cute banter back and forth. And finally, he kind of dropped the tent like, oh, you know, I make these really amazing homemade enchiladas. I know, I know. And he was just like, you know,

how would you feel if I made dinner for you? And he came over. Did it feel too good to be true already? He's hot. He's got cats. He cooks for you. Honestly, kind of. But, you know, you also have that thing where you're like,

well, maybe 27 or 80 times the charm, whatever we're at now. And so you're like, we'll see. I like your eternal optimism on the date. You know, like to go out on that many dates and keep trying. You kind of have to be because I think if you get too jaded, that's not attractive to people either. Yeah, that's true too.

That's probably where I'm at. I'm guessing you RSVP'd yes to the enchilada date. I did. Nice. So, you know, I went over there. Really cute place. Clean. Another plus.

Oh, wow. So he makes these enchiladas, and I'm watching him cook. There's something so sexy about watching a man cook when he knows his way around the kitchen. I really like it when they throw a towel, like, over the side of their shoulder. That's, like, a thing for me. Oh, yeah, and the big chef hats. Sexy. No, but I will take an apron though.

Oh, an apron is good. A hat is not good, Joe. Okay, I'll get rid of mine. Hairnet either. You don't need a hairnet. Oh, what about the big fake mustache? Sweetest chef style. Yeah.

Okay. What was the vibe like, the conversation? So it was good. Like our banter online was pretty much the same in person, which is always nice. You know, it wasn't awkward and we're chatting back and forth. And of course, inevitably, it always comes to the same question, which is, you know, what do you do for a living? And the thing is, I work in insurance. That is not a sexy thing to talk about. It's boring. What are you talking about? Insurance is hot.

I can show you a 20-page document. You have to sign on the bottom. All in nine fonts. So you told him insurance? Yeah, well, if I'm feeling out and the vibe is good, I'll usually be pretty honest and be like, my day job is insurance, but I'm also an author and I'm working on a book right now. That is better. You're right. And that's true, right?

It is true. Yes. But the problem is they always say, well, what are you working on now? And I am really honest about it. And this is true. I'm working on a collection of all the worst dates that i've been on oh okay okay it's a slightly relatable i have a lot of comedian friends and it's hard to date because girls immediately go oh i don't want to end up in one of your jokes on stage yeah totally this would be like i don't want to end up in one of your books yeah then don't mess it up well that's a lot of pressure brooke it's easy mess up. Is that the vibe of what happened with Tommy? Yeah, it really kind of derailed.

We finished dinner. Dinner was great still, but this is the thing I usually will do too. I don't want to put too much pressure on somebody, especially if you're invited to their home or whatever. So I made plans already to go and meet up with my friends after we had dinner in a bar. And i told him that

i said you're more than welcome to come hoping that he would but you're more than welcome to come isn't always a full invite it feels like a pity invite i feel like oh but i think some people would like to be invited like that you know like for me it's like it doesn't i don't feel pressured where it's like shoot now if i say no i'm rejecting her it interesting. It's kind of like, oh, you know what? I don't think this time, but maybe next time. What did he say? Oh, he said no. Oh, yeah. Yeah, and it was really weird.

And, like, we had this really awkward hug goodbye. Oh. And I really liked him a lot. And I really just want some clarity because I feel like this is a thing that you can't be mad at somebody for working on something well before you ever met. Well, and it doesn't have anything to do with him i mean what what was his reaction because you seem to think that this was the main part of the night where things started to go

downhill like tell us more about how tommy reacted when you told him about the book i got a vibe from him that he just started to like internalize and be like oh well is that why she's on a date with me is she really interested in me or is this research you know well you should tell him you're past the research stage that was three months ago you're well into the second edit of this thing when he rejected you you should have just pulled out a notebook and been like well making a footnote of this. Thanks for chapter 24. We'll see once and for all if he does end up in your book. Can we be in the book? I don't want to be in that book.

Why do you want to be? It's the worst experiences. You know what? I'm probably already in her book. Twice, actually. We'll come back and we're going to call Tommy and see if we can get you another date with him when we do your second date update next. Second date update. Top three worst things you could say to a guy on a first date.

Okay. I'm not who I said I was. Yeah, that's not good. Oh, wow. Your dad was better. Oh, dang. Truth hurts. I'm a New York Jets fan.

Oh, boo. Yikes. I'm a New York Jets fan. Oh, boo. Yikes. You just love mediocrity. Do those exist, though? Like, they don't really exist. I'm not even a New York fan. They're like a giant. They're too embarrassed to admit it.

But also, not a great idea to tell a guy, I'm currently writing a book about the worst dudes I've ever gone out with. That's pretty dang bad, bro. Is it bad, though? I mean, it's pretty dang bad, bro. Is it bad, though? I mean, it's your first date with her. You think so, too? It plays off of a guy's insecurities, which are many. And that's exactly

what Fran said when she was out with Tommy the other night while he was making her enchiladas. That moment kind of derailed their entire night. But he was a guy that had cats in the photo of his dating profile. He shouldn't have had insecurities. What? You know?

She understands what I'm saying, right? Does that make sense to you, Fran? I mean, yeah. I thought he was more in touch with that stuff. See? Huh. So I don't just get a cat and I'm perfect. I love it. Just like the vibe of cat dudes give off like, I'm stable.

I know who I am. Huh. Really? Give you a mental checklist before you buy a cat. I'm just saying. That's the vibe. That's the vibe. Okay.

Okay. I'll accept that. Okay. Nothing toxic about what Brooke just said. I don't think Jeff is accepting it, though. Shouldn't have insecurities. All right. Let's see if he agrees with that sentiment when we call him right now.

You ready to do this, Fran? Let's do it. I hope one of the cats answer. Let's see if he agrees with that sentiment when we call him right now. You ready to do this, Fran? Let's do it. I hope one of the cats answer. Let's give it a try. Hello? Hey, is this Tommy? Yes. You an insecure boy, Tommy?

What? Why did you say that? i don't see what you thought no i thought he wasn't tommy sorry sorry we already were having a discussion before we called yeah it spilled over into this phone call uh we're a radio show called brooke and jeffrey in the morning yo uh why are you calling me good question we're doing this segment called a second date update and one of our listeners asked us to reach out to you because you two Why are you calling me? Good question. We're doing this segment called A Second Date Update. And one of our listeners asked us to reach out to you because you two hung out the other night. Remember Fran?

Yeah, yeah, I do. You cooked enchiladas for her, we heard, which is a pretty awesome move. How do you know all this? This is straight from Fran's mouth. Well, Fran's mouth to my ears to my mouth. Why are you know all this? This is straight from Fran's mouth. Well, Fran's mouth to my ears to my mouth. Why are you making everything so strange today? I don't know. Fran told us is what he's trying to say. Those are the words I was looking for.

All you have to say is told us. She likes you and she wants to see you again and is confused why it hasn't happened yet. Um, well, I mean, just being honest, it was a little weird. Oh, weird?

Yeah. Okay. Well, here's the deal, man. Look, we get emails all the time from people asking us to do these for them, and Fran admitted that she's dated a lot of people, and you stood out among all the guys. You were different. And she really, really liked you.

And she also wishes that she didn't bring up the book that she was writing. Well, okay. So that's the thing. I mean, it was going fine. You know, she seemed nice enough, you know, it was a fine date. And then she brings up this book and it's just like, I mean, it's so weird. Like, am I just content for you to put into your book? But she wouldn't tell you about the book if she thought you were going to be in it.

Like, she's just sharing what's going on in your life, her life. And she had already written about all the other bad dates. She was really thought she was on a good date with you. Yeah. Okay. But here's the thing. So then I'm like, okay, this is kind of weird, but maybe it's fine. You know, maybe this doesn't

include me. But then I was like, hey, what are some of the bad dates that you went on? Yeah, that's good. Just showing interest. That's a good question. Then you know what not to do. Well, and I'm sure she has, like, some big stories that she made bigger just to make the book entertaining, too, right? That's true, yeah. Did she tell you, or did she keep it a secret?

You have to buy the book to find out. She only read read the first 20 sentences and then you have to purchase the rest yeah she told me a few and they're all 100 real that she didn't embellish okay but one of them she was like oh man it was so terrible i like went had this date with this, and he just wanted to play board games all night. We went back to his place, and he had Monopoly, and he had Scrabble. It was just like an endless, like, that's all he wanted to do. Monopoly? What, he wanted this date to last three days? It's not really book-worthy.

Yeah, that's true. That was her horror story. So what's the problem with that? Well, the thing is that I kind of had a whole night planned, and after dinner, like, what's in my living room? A couple of board games for me to play. Oh, no. Oh, I see.

So it just derailed your, okay. I can't. And then I had to make excuses to, like, sneak over to the living room and, like, hide the games I had. Oh, buddy. Like, I guess we're not going to play connect for tonight. I bet that that's not what she meant. I bet it's not that she didn't want to play board games.

It's just that maybe this guy had literally hours of it playing or something or he wanted, or it was like really competitive in a dumb way, you know? Yeah. I mean, maybe, but then she was also like,

I've been on like so many dates where like guys have tried to cook for me. It's just like totally burnt the food. And I'm like in the middle of cooking while she says this. So then I'm like, oh, my God. Turning the oven down. If I don't get these enchiladas perfect, I'm going to get ripped about. And I'm like, it was just very stressful. Okay.

I mean, I could see how her stories, you could interpret them to be about you. I don't think that was, it wasn't her intention though. Yeah. And you don't have to just believe us telling you that. You can hear it straight from Fran's mouth. Why do I keep saying it like that? I don't know. That's the body parts, buddy.

Because she's on the other line right now and wants to talk to you man oh my god hey that's fran in her mouth yeah go ahead friends mouth say stuff um i hey tommy i'm first of all i'm sorry that's a good start everything that you said is true. And you had asked, and I just thought it would be, like, they were kind of funny and silly, and I just thought it would be fine to kind of talk about it. But I can see how that would send somebody kind of into their head. Tommy? Yeah.

Are you hearing her? No, he's in his head. Yeah. I don't know. It's just like a little, I mean, I don't know how you want me to feel about that, you know? It's just like, I feel like, all right, sweet. Put a ton of pressure on me, like, on this first date when I don't know how you want me to feel about that. You know, it's just like, I feel like it's like, all right, sweet. Put a ton of pressure on me, like on this first date when I don't know you, you know? Right.

Listen, first of all, I had no idea about the board games. And I'm sorry if you felt like you had to hide stuff. And to be clear, the board game guy tried to explain Settlers of Catan to me for an hour, and I just couldn't handle it. But it's not that you hate any board games as a date night. It was just with that particular guy, right? You're down to Scrabble with Tommy, maybe? Scrabble's one of the worst games.

Scrabble's so fun. You want Mousetrap? Yeah. Play some Operation? Hungry, hungry hippos can turn into hungry, hungry hippos. No, they can't, Jose.

Please for me. I've actually never played Hungry, Hungry Hippos. Oh, Brooke, you're missing out.

It is the worst game. It is so dumb. I'm sorry. Fun for the whole family. It is. I mean, honestly, as somebody who

talked about not liking board games, I really like that game. See? It's like 4v1, Brooke. Take that. Okay.

All right. Fine. I really, Tommy, I'm going to take Okay. All right. Fine. Yeah, Brooke. I really, Tommy, I'm going to take Fran's side here. I really don't think you need to feel insecure about her worst people I've ever dated book. Just don't read chapter 14. Maybe her second book can be about how her dating life turned into a relationship, and that could be starring you. Nobody wants to read that.

Okay. I'm writing a worst coworkers I've ever had book, and no one in this room is in it. and that could be starring you. Nobody wants to read that. Okay. I'm writing a worst coworkers I've ever had book and no one in this room is in it. See, you don't need to feel insecure about that at all. I don't. Keep talking. Just by comparison. But I really think you should give Fran another shot here, Tommy.

And if you're willing to go out with her, we'll pay for that date. Look, I was having a good time oh good if i can just maybe just get a promise that she's not gonna write about me that would be amazing this is gonna be a really juicy chapter that she'd have to leave out i'll tell i'll tell you what tomm. I will do you one better. I will write about this, except I will take full responsibility and be the bad date. Oh, you're going to be the bad date. Table sift turd. Wait, does that mean you're using us as content

to be in your book? Ooh, I think I have to call my agent first. No, put me in. I'm sure that there's a cut that we're supposed to get. Too late. I already have the chapter outlined. No. Okay, well, I'm starting a new book. Worst listeners I've ever talked to on the radio.

But congratulations, you guys. We're going to send you on a new book. Hey! Keep us updated, okay? And let us know how to win the books published as well. And who wins Hungry Hungry Hippos, too. Oh, that's going to be good. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

Text board is blowing up right now. Not surprised. 97% of people agree Brooke is a bad person for not liking Hungry Hungry Hippos. You guys, it's not a very good game. Like, there's no strategy at all. You just bang on that thing. That's all you do. You know, Brooke, we tend to not like things

when we see ourselves reflected in them. Is that maybe what's going on here? I mean, I'm not going to lie. Every time I eat my lunch every day,

I'm very hungry after. Yeah. If the hippos were eating kale and crawdad salad, you'd say, best game ever. All right. You got me.

You got me there. I need to eat little white balls. That's what the hungry hippos eat. That's right. I'm glad we were able to get them a second date. They really sounded like they had good chemistry. I'm curious to hear, too, if and when her book actually gets published. Yeah, totally.

I hope she stays updated. I feel like we should read it. Yeah, we should. I mean, I'll do an audio book. I want to read it. Yeah. Remember, you can always email the show. We'll call that person who isn't calling you back.

Check out all of our second day podcasts up online wherever you get your podcasts at Brooke and Jeffrey. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Ugh, we're so done with new year, new you. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's

because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it.

For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.