Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Happy Shamaversary

Episode Date: May 26, 2023

One of our listeners tried to go the “funny” route for a first date activity and it ended up stinking worse than Brooke’s microwaved lunches. You’ll hear what happened in a Second Date podcast!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025.

I'll be joined by David Roth of Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr. With guest appearances from Behind the Bastards Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis, and a few surprise guests throughout the show. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from. Second Date Update. What happens if you meet someone on a dating app and you find out that both of you have been in the dating pool for way too long? What does that mean? It's like, what's wrong with you? That's when you need to mix it up.

Like one of our listeners, Wayne, did recently. Did he suggest both of them dress up as their favorite Power Ranger and meet in front of the police station? That's actually a really fun idea. He went as a red Power Ranger, didn't he? He didn't do that. Oh, he didn't. But it would have been a fantastic idea. Instead, he went a different direction. And now he says he's living

with a medium amount of regret okay i feel like that most adults live that way yeah it's like not overwhelming but he can still sleep at night wayne only a 90 chance you're gonna regret asking us for help today so welcome to the show namaste yeah i i am having some regret you know it started as a good idea okay we't they all? We'll get to your questionable idea in just a second. But first, tell us about the girl that you went out with. Who's she? Her name's Isabella.

Okay. That's a pretty name. Yeah, and from Jeffrey's description, it sounds like, I don't know, maybe you're a little exhausted from online dating? Oh, definitely. Okay. Aren't we all, brother? I mean, do you still have hope going into a first date with someone when you're just tired of it all?

I have a sliver of hope, yeah. You don't just show up, but it's like, all right, just give me a reason to leave. What's your name? So tell us about what you wanted to do with Isabella. Oh, yeah. So Isabella, you know, a couple weeks weeks we were chatting and we had really awesome conversations. OK. And like talked about our favorite candy and like our top three. Deep. That is some deep stuff.

Jumping started because Brooke will stop. Yeah. What is your favorite candy? I'm kidding. Easy. Reese's Pieces. OK. Reese's Pieces. Not the cup. Does your first date have to do with like a candy shop or something? No, but kind of like a game well basically we had so many fun conversations and she was like it never translates into a good first date and i

was like well let's just skip the first date then and we can pretend like it's our second or third date oh okay can you do that i like that how do you yeah yeah you could do You can act like, yeah, remember last time when we talked, I said that. You're like, why are you telling me this story again? You told me on our first date. See, it's already funny, Brooke. We're getting along so well. And she was like, well, why don't we pretend it was our one-year anniversary? Oh.

Whoa. That escalated quickly, sir. You're like, let's jump right to the divorce and start breaking up items in our home. You're like, it's been one year and you still won't sleep with me. Wait, were you into that idea? Uh, you know, yeah. I was like, why not? What have we got to lose at this rate?

And you may get a free dessert out of it from the restaurant, you know, whenever they know it's an anniversary. Yeah. Okay, so what'd you end up doing? And you may get a free dessert out of it from the restaurant, you know, whenever they know it's an anniversary. Yeah. Okay. So what'd you end up doing? Oh, we made a reservation for a one-year anniversary. And I ordered actually a bottle of champagne. Oh, you're a good boyfriend after a whole year. We had to put out flowers with a card.

Oh. One year down, forever to go. I legit want to steal this. One year down, forever to go? I legit want to steal this. One year down, forever to go? That was the card? Yeah, yeah. Wow, romantic. Did she think that's funny or did it feel like too much to her?

Because you really took this to a serious level. Yeah, you owned it. When we met, we had happy one year anniversary jokes. And she was into it too she came with like a present for me which i was a little prepared for that's thoughtful what was it yeah her present was a fake coupon book that's really funny like free hug yeah it was kind of like that but she was kind of like sarcastic said free hug free hug. It was like, hug yourself or do the laundry yourself. Oh.

Okay. Oh, that's more like the 10-year anniversary. She sounds really funny. Did you guys laugh a lot on your date? Yeah. The first like 15, 20 minutes of the dinner were pretty fun. Okay. Then it got a little serious.

Oh. Oh, serious. Why? It was probably with me. I was too into it, took it too far, because I started kind of telling her who she can be friends with, you know. What? Like, I don't actually know any of her friends,

so I was kind of making it up. Oh. Wait, you turned into the boyfriend that she wants to dump, is what you turned into. Yeah, the ones the friends don't like. Yeah, what the hell? Well, hopefully you told her don't hang around Brooke, because she's a wet blanket about your date idea.

That's terrible. I mean, you know, Lane's a bad influence. She, you know, she's like, what do you mean? I don't know if she meant what do you mean who's Lane or what. Because there is no Lane. Yeah, that's the joke. That's exactly. Okay.

So you were a fake toxic boyfriend? Yeah. Cute. I was confused. I mean, what happened to the romantic guy that she was dating? You know, fake dating. Yeah. I mean, I had to fix in a little bit of real fake life.

Dude, that's exactly why she's not calling you back. No, you have to create some fake lows to enjoy those fake highs in your relationship. No, you don't put up with that type of crap in a relationship. Brooke, he's been single long enough. He has to do something. I'm not surprised anymore. Maybe there's a reason. Yeah. Was that been single long enough. He has to do something. I'm not surprised anymore. Maybe there's a reason. Was that it?

Was there more to the date? Yeah, it kind of got worse, perhaps, because then we kind of shifted in the topic of how to discipline our kids. Oh. You're only one year into a relationship.

You already have kids? No, we don't have kids now, but in the one anniversary world, it's normal to talk about, you know, how do you discipline kids? No, we don't have kids now, but in the one anniversary world, it's normal to talk about, you know, how you discipline kids. You didn't see eye to eye on how to parent your fake children? No, we were disagreeing a lot about that. She said something about my mom being overbearing. I mean, how much longer did you guys last after that?

Well, you know, it was hard coming out of like the overbearing mom thing. It got a little awkward. It just wasn't a good idea. All right, man. Well, it sounds like you had a couple hiccups on the date. Very tiny ones. No. Big hiccups.

Painful hiccups. They don't work. It was all pretend. I know. Every relationship goes through these moments before they find their like stride. Isn't that right, Brooke? Yeah, sure. Usually not on the first date.

But on the one-year anniversary, it makes sense. So we're going to play a song. We're going to come back. We're going to call your girlfriend of one year, Isabella. And we're going to see if we can get her to go out with you one more time, okay? It's so weird for the second time. Hold on. Second Date update.

Jose keeps telling me off the air that he's going to steal this date idea. I am. Even though the girl clearly isn't calling back after it. And it ended in total disaster. But it's so funny. Not to the woman in the room. They left mad at each other. If a girl isn't calling you back, Jose, usually that's a bad sign.

I know, but it's just like how much fun could you have imagining your one-year anniversary? Fake fights, fake arguments. He just wants to be in a relationship so badly. But we're talking about one of our listeners, Wayne, who just went out on a date with someone named Isabella. And on their first date, they pretended that it was their one-year anniversary. So they set it all up with champagne and flowers at a restaurant. But Wayne thinks he may have overcommitted to the character when he made some jokey comments about

who Isabella can and can't hang out with and how they are going to parent their future non-existent children someday down the road. It's fake, guys. I know. But, Wayne, why did you go with controlling boyfriend as your persona? Yeah. I don't know.

I wasn't really thinking I was doing controlling boyfriend. I was just thinking, you know, one year you have these little, like... No, telling someone who they can and can't hang out with is very controlling. I mean, I was just looking out for Lane's a bad influence in the office. I haven't met a good Lane in my life. Don't you get it, guys? It's funny. What about Lois Lane? Didn't your husband buy you a dish rack

on your one-year anniversary? Yeah, but he never tried to tell me who I couldn't hang out with. He just said, get in the kitchen and clean some dishes. Don't get the water all over the counter. He's like, I'm hanging out with Mr. Cleans. I'm out of here. So it can't turn out any worse than that.

Right, Wayne? Let's just call Isabella and see how this goes. Any worse than brunch? That's all I'm saying. Here we go. I'm going to dial Isabella. Let's do this. Hello?

Hey, is this Isabella? Yes, this is she. Hey, Isabella, my name's Jeff from a radio show called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. Okay. Like that sass. I don't know what you expected to say, Jeff. You're really funny, Isabella, already. Hi.

Hi. Hi. This is the whole morning show. Hi. That's Brooke. You probably know their social Isabella, already. Hi. Hi. Hi. This is the whole morning show. Hi. That's Brooke. You probably know their social media handle, Brooke Fox Fox.

Yeah, sure, Jeff. There's Jose at Hilarious Jose. Hilarious Jose on everything. Yeah, and then Alexis at Alexis Fuller. Underscore. Underscore Fuller.

No, no 16. Oh, okay. Forget it. You guys, don't argue. I don't follow you guys. How am I supposed to know? I don't think... We're not calling because it's social media. Just so you know. Yeah, follow us, though, okay. Forget it. You guys, don't argue. I don't follow you guys. I don't think... We're not calling because it's social media.

Just so you know. Yeah, follow us though anyway. We're doing a dating segment on this show asking about somebody that you went out with recently named Wayne. Oh. Oh? At Wayne Elaine.

Was that a good oh? What do you want to know? Well, we want to know what you thought about your date because we've heard a little bit about it from Wayne, but we'd like to get your perspective on it. Was it, was it, stop dancing. Producer's dancing in the corner. I mean, I think it was a really clever idea of mine. Oh, yeah.

To do the one-year anniversary thing? Yeah. Yeah, we love that. Can you tell Brooke what an amazing idea that date was? So fun. It sounds like it. She doesn't believe that people can have fun doing that. I'm not saying it didn't sound fun.

It just, you know. Didn't end fun? I don't know. It depends on what you think. Like, did you think it was fun? I mean, it started out pretty fun because like it was silly and just like yeah we already know each other we've known each other for a year or whatever but then like i don't know we're talking about our family and there was like

this weird moment where i made this joke about his mom being overbearing and stuff like that which is a pretty stereotypical mother-in-law joke. Absolutely. But his response to that was like, are you sure you want to eat that pasta? Like, I want you to live a long and healthy life. And I don't know if that could be something that's a part of your diet. No.

I'm going to take a line from Alexa. I mean, stop. He already told us about the friend thing, too. Like, why is he doing that? Or does he have kind of a point if he wants you to live long And healthy Get out of here I mean if he really cared about you

Oh my god But then he like Brought up this person I can't even remember her name but like he brought up this person Because it was made up or whatever but he was like I don't want you seeing her anymore Bad influence for you and blah blah blah And like because it was made up or whatever, but he was like, I don't want you seeing her anymore. Bad influence for you and blah, blah, blah. And like, yeah, it was made up, but like kind of a red flag for me.

I would have alarm bells going off left and right. Like beacons of like. Wait, I don't understand. You made a joke about his mom being overbearing. Yeah, but that's like a stereotypical joke. Oh, why is that okay? Because he's not talking about who he is overbearing. Yeah, but that's like a stereotypical joke. Oh, why is that okay? Because he's not talking about who he is as a person. He's not talking about who she is as a person.

Can I just say something? It wasn't a real person. Okay. Sorry, that's Wayne, Isabella. He just jumped in the conversation. It was a made-up person, Isabella. We were in it together for our one-year anniversary. I don't know. I was upset when you talked about my mom

and even though she is very overbearing, you don't know her. You hit a nail on the head, huh? You're not listening. You're saying about the mom and then you completely changed around onto me and something about me as a person.

That didn't really hit well you know we weren't we were joking about our family and then suddenly you started telling me that i shouldn't eat pasta like yeah family joking is okay but talking about food that crosses the line you don't tell people what they can or can't eat can or can't not hang out with if it's out of concern for your safety and health and well-being. No, no, no. No, she's not a child. You're not her dad.

Like, get out of here. And why do you think boyfriends act that way? Like, if you're just, even if you're just pretending. And, like, pasta isn't even bad for you. Yes. Like, what are you doing? You're basically just feeding into the stereotype that carbs make you fat and I'm fat like I didn't mean it like that. I was coming from the health perspective and

About you why you have a healthy long life together No, I mean it'd be one thing if you said don't smoke you know like sure what's wrong with smoking yeah you're telling me what i can and can't do you get her jeff i mean if it wasn't pasta there wouldn't be the freak out i mean it seems like a big freak out over one thing is that all that it was he made a a bad joke about what she can and can't eat in a fake scenario a lot of the it was a lot of the making up this stuff which you know like there was one where he was talking about like our kids and disciplining our kids and i was like okay if we're just dating on a one-year anniversary that's not something that you usually talk about is disciplining your children if you haven't even talked about wanting to have kids yet.

And I was like, all right. I don't get any of this. What are you talking about? We already talked about having kids at our six-month mark. Oh, my God. No. You forgot that conversation, Isabella? Oh, my God.

No, that conversation maybe happened with another girl. He's kidding, guys. I know. It's just a joke. He could have been a lot hotter situation than this. He's not very funny. Like, wait. Come on, guys. He's just trying to joke and balance it out. He could have been a lot hotter situation than this. He's not very funny. Like, Wayne, come on, man. It's like foreshadowing just a crappy relationship is what you were doing.

Brooke, she's just against me the whole time. Yeah, she's on you, bro. Wayne emailed us for help. Remember that, Brooke. Yeah. This date idea was all her idea to pretend to be like a couple a year into a relationship. A cute couple that's fun. But also realistic. And like flirty.

You talk about like your pretend European vacation you have this year. Yeah, that's fun. Now he has to pay for a big Euro trip. Otherwise, he's a bad boyfriend. She's obviously going to split the cost, Jeffrey. They've only been together for one year, okay? She's an independent working woman. Give her a break.

Is that true? Isabella? In the fake world, are you? I would absolutely pay my own way, but like I would appreciate if he offered. In the fake world? What is going on? But that's a much more fun conversation. Alright, fine. Would you like to go

to Europe with me? I'll pay for it. Yeah, now we're talking. Absolutely. Wait, what? The fake one just got way better. I'll pay for it. You and me on the off the coast. Oh, wow.

Hey, leave the kids behind. Okay. Well, come on, guys. Literally, I think he tried to take the bad angle as a joke, and it didn't work. I think she moved her gut. You guys are still laughing right now. You have chemistry.

Yeah, like we can all tell when a joke is a joke and when it's not a joke. Yes. Except him. And I'm not joking right now when I say I want to pay for a second date for both of you, and I will pay for it. Yes. Pre-Europe. Pre-Europe trip. Pre-Europe.

Yes, just a regular first date, and we can pretend that you guys haven't been dating for a long time anymore. A real second date. A real second date. I would be okay with a real second date. Really? And just see what he's really like in the present moment instead of thinking what a future should be.

Oh, my God. I can't believe you said that. Oh, my God. I can't believe you said yes. Wayne, are you still up for this? Yeah, of course. And she won't regret it at all. Yay!

Just no more hypotheticals on your guys' date. You guys should not joke at all. Look what happens. True love prevails, even when Brooke tries to actively kill him. Yeah, that's a cause. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Yeah, tabletop. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what?

We love that for you. Someone else will, too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble. Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money Podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general.

You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline's CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends,

but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025. I'll be joined by David Roth of Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr., with guest appearances from Behind the Bastards' Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis, and a few surprise guests throughout the show. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from.