Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: It's a Costume Dummy

Episode Date: October 29, 2021

One of our listeners met his date at a Halloween party when he over-confidently used a pick-up line... That seriously backfired. He quickly realized his mistake and wants our help redeeming himself!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

John Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Second Date Update Apparently, there were a lot of Halloween parties this year. Alright. Because we've gotten more than a few requests for second date updates from people who met someone while being at one this over the past weekend. People are getting back to it, man. Yeah. And so I don't know if we're going to be able to get to all of them. That's why I'm just going to choose today's based on costume alone. Ooh, I like that.

Okay. Valid. And that's why I picked Scott, who went as a car crash test dummy. Oh, okay. That's a good costume. That's my favorite character to play with in Fortnite. So, Scott, welcome to the show. Hi, everybody.

Hey, what's up, dummy? Solid choice. Yeah, I mean, working with Brooke, we see so many weird, complicated costumes. It's basically like a riddle to try and figure out what she is. That's why I really appreciate your straightforward costume. Yeah, definitely kind of went old school a little bit. Okay. It's still unique, too.

I'd like to say last year I was a dumpster fire, and it totally made sense. Oh, you were. That was good. Yeah, thank you. Scott, go ahead. Tell us about the person that you met at this party. Who are they? Okay, her name is Lauren. Okay. She's very, go ahead. Tell us about the person that you met at this party. Who are they? Okay. Her name is Lauren.

Okay. She's very, very pretty. And she was dressed like Elle Woods from the movie Legally Blonde. Oh, yeah. You know, Reese Witherspoon. That's a great costume. I've been wanting to do that all pink. All pink lawyer.

So good. And it's not like you're sexifying something that shouldn't be sexy either. It doesn't even matter. What are we talking about? Reese Witherspoon is sexy. No something that shouldn't be sexy either. This doesn't even matter. What are we talking about? Reese Witherspoon is sexy. No, that's what I'm saying. You're not sexifying the dumpster fire or something. It's just an awesome costume because it's darling.

You look good. So you complimented her costume, Scott? Well, I tried. So I didn't really know the movie. What? Oh, yeah. So you didn't know who she was? Yeah, I never saw it why would i see

legally blind oh you should go watch it it is a treasure i don't remember it is ruining everything you're saying right now it's so good don't call it a treasure it is it's such a good movie all right so what did you do with lauren well i thought she was a sexy flight attendant. Oh, I can see that. I can see it. It's that, like, pink suit. Yeah. So it looks very kind of formal. All pink.

Yeah. So I kind of, it was a very stupid, cheesy line of, like, join, like, the Mile High Club. Oh. Oh. It didn't make sense. She's like, you know what? You needed to bend and snap.

Yeah. How did she react to that comment? Well, she was a and snap. Yeah. How did she react to that comment? Well, she was a little confused because she didn't understand where that comment was coming from. Uh-huh. Yeah. She explained the movie to me

and I was like, oh, okay, that makes way more sense. Yeah. He's like, wait, is it like the ex-wife of Tiger or something? It's hard to start off a sexy conversation like that with that big misunderstanding and most people spend so much time on getting a creative halloween costume if you don't get it right away it's almost like a low blow yeah were you able to get back on your

feet after that yeah we were able to talk and you know she asked me about my costume and was asking me all like certain questions about like the car accident i was in and i was like oh this is really great because like you she's really like obviously knew what my costume was and like was really going along with it yeah that's nice okay yeah we talked for pretty much the rest of the night and it felt I felt connected by the end I thought it was really cool okay so wait this was the party your date or did you guys actually go out after you met no no we just we met at the party okay okay all right was there any like romance that happened during the party because it sounds like you just spent an hour or two talking about each other's

costumes just figuring them out yeah well towards the actually probably the back half of the conversation stuff i went and grabbed us both a couple of red jello shot syringes oh yeah oh that's cool those are fun yeah Yeah, those are cool. Yeah, okay. And then we kind of intertwined our arms and squirted them into each other's mouths. Oh, that's cute. It's kind of hot.

I think I like that. It's hot. It's an interesting... It's a cute memory, but if you do them enough, you're not going to remember the next one. Yeah. So what about any intimacy? Did you get a hug?

Did you get a kiss, maybe? Why did you not get on him for saying things like that intimacy that's a make out session that was fine you're using words like old stuff that's fine what's wrong with that can you not focus on me can you focus on Scott we're trying to help out Scott Brooke

okay did you make out Scott we did not make out before things got to that point, she did have to leave, but before she left though, she gave me her phone number and said in a sexy voice, if I needed any legal counseling. Oh, okay.

I love it. That's cool. Yeah. Have you reached out to her? I've texted her twice, and she has not responded to me. Oh. Nothing? Nothing. You're not saying anything weird, right?

You're just saying, hi, it's me. Like, does she know who's sexing her? Well, I mean, I tried to reply with some type of quote or something from one of the movies, but I think I accidentally like ran to the second one and it was not quite as quotable as the first one, I guess. I don't remember the second one at all. I don't know if most people watch that one. Yeah.

You could have made it up and just been like, and that's why I go to college. They're like, oh, sure, I believe it. I think... Besides her giving, obviously, her number to you, did you get any other indication? Like, did you guys talk about future dates or plans? Not necessarily.

Not really, like, not like the end of a first date conversation. It was kind of like, hey, this is fun. Like, can I get your number? Yeah, yeah. Okay. She offered me the numbers. Okay.

You wouldn't offer it if you didn't want it. And she said it in that sexy, you know, like Elle Woods legal counseling way. Did you deliver something sexy back to her? Like, oh, well, I hope to have a head-on collision with your face. With my face. That was bad. Now I'll make fun of Jeff. That was bad.

Yeah. That was bad. Well, at least it's something. I don't know. I'm just trying to tie it in. Anyway. I'll be your airbag. That was good.

Okay. Hey, don't you like that? Scott likes it? No. All right. That would have worked on him. Well, let's play a song. We'll come back.

We'll call Lauren for you, and we'll try and get you your second date update, you sexy, crushed-ass dummy. Thanks. Okay. Scott's first date at a Halloween party recently sounded a lot like our office Halloween parties. What? Confusing, disappointing, and at the end, absolutely zero action. It's just a lot of, wait, what are you supposed to be? No, wait, what are you supposed to be?

Brooke still gets action, though. Somehow. Boom closet's good for something, boys. That's how Scott ended up meeting Lauren, who went dressed as Elle Woods. He thought she was a sexy flight attendant. But anyway, that confusion got them talking, drinking together, hanging out. And it went so well that she even offered Scott her number before she left. But weirdly, she hasn't responded to any of his texts since.

So, Scott, sorry for pointing out that you didn't get any action. But, hey, you know what? That's what we have the second date updates for. We can't guarantee it, but we all hope for action. Does that sound good, Scott? All of us. That sounds great, yeah. Do you have any guesses as to what she's going to say when we call her and ask why she's not returning your texts?

I'm not sure. Maybe she doesn't like the costume. Maybe she thinks I would look different outside of it. I don't know, honestly. What were you again? I already forgot. Test crash dummy. I got to say, if you get a number wearing a nude onesie as a man to be a test crash test dummy, you must look great in that outfit because that is a hard one to pull off.

That's true, dude. Thanks. Yeah, you're welcome. Okay, well, for the record, I was the one that called you a sexy crash test dummy first, so I think you all know where we stand. I called you that three minutes ago, but if you want to thankoke you know for the late comment on it that's fine too anyway i'm gonna dial lauren's number and we'll uh we'll try and get your second date update you ready man i appreciate it all right you sexy man let's do this Hello?

Hi, is this Lauren? Yeah, speaking. Hey, Lauren, my name is Jeff from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. And I apologize for saying Jeff like in a weird way. Yeah, my name's Jeff. My name's Jeff. I didn't even notice until you pointed it out. Sorry, I caught myself on that one.

But no, this is a morning radio show, Lauren. Okay, why? It's morning radio show, Lauren. Okay. Why? It's a great question, Lauren. Well, we're doing a segment called the Second Date Update where we help our listeners reconnect with people that they've gone out on dates with recently. How'd you get this number? Well, someone that you met the other night gave it to us because they said that they had a great time hanging out with you. In fact, you were the one that gave them your number.

I haven't been on any dates in, like, longer than I'd like to admit, actually. Yeah, it wasn't a date. It was a Halloween party. His name's Scott. Oh. You remember Scott? He was a crash test dummy. yeah i remember him good and you remember giving him your phone number saying to call you um yeah if he needed legal counsel wait but you

were dressed as l wood so that was like the joke right yeah well i was but i'm actually a lawyer also oh i thought you were sticking with a joke. Wait, so, like, you gave him your number because, like, in case he wanted to be your client, like, for real? Yeah, I mean, he told me this terrible story about an accident he was in recently, and I thought he might need representation. Oh, no. I see. He got the world. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Wait, so you were interested in maybe dating him. You weren't thinking of it that way? I hadn't really thought about it. I thought we were just, you know, having a friendly conversation at a party. I thought he got you a drink. Maybe. What I mean is there was no like, hey, can I grab you a drink? I get drinks from people all the time and I don't date them.

But they did the shot thing. Remember he said they did the shot thing. He did jello shot syringes with him yeah fed each other yeah i guess i mean i probably with a dozen other people okay okay he was reading it wrong alcohol was a factor i mean he felt like there was a connection that you guys had that you guys were talking for a long time and hanging out and that's why you gave him the number i mean it was really loud in there to be honest i guess there was a misunderstanding clearly oh no okay but wait this isn't bad i mean you're not saying no you just weren't thinking of it as the time like are you single right now uh yeah okay do you remember how attractive and hot he was in the crash test suit

uh well i mean he was wearing a helmet so lauren hello i was dressed up as a crash test dummy she got that uh scott yeah yeah scott's been on the other line listening this entire time, Lauren. Yeah. Okay. It went with my costume because I was a crash test dummy. You made the story up about the crash you were in

that she was offering you legal advice for. I mean, so you just made everything up? Turns out I don't know anything about you. You were telling me all about being a lawyer but

i thought you just were doing the same thing i was and coming up with a backstory you thought that when she was telling you about l woods you didn't know that she was a real lawyer you thought she was just making a thing about being l woods the whole time yeah i thought she either like really researched it or really watched the movie a lot because she was like very knowledgeable about being a lawyer. Oh, my God. And she thought you were really a dummy. Yeah.

It was like method acting. You guys thought you were method acting, but it was really real life. You guys are really good acting. Yeah. So, Lauren, are you understanding he wasn't in a real crash? I mean, I get it now, but you had a lot of things to say about this accident. I assumed it was real. I just had fun making it up.

I like making up stuff. Wait, don't say that. Bro, are you, like, lying? Like, how detailed are we talking here? Yeah, like, how dark? I mean, describing the way the cars were coming and, like, what I would ask him about as a lawyer. Like, I got a key bone on the left side. I stopped at the light and then I went, oh my gosh.

And Lauren's actually taking notes like, ooh, you do actually, I think, have a case here. Absolutely, I would represent you. Why is this conversation happening at a party? Oh, it was a hit and run? Oh, really? Oh my God. What a funny misunderstanding.

Okay, well, now you guys know that that's not the case. Right, you guys do realize that, right? Lauren, he's not a real crash test dummy, and Scott, she is a real lawyer. Yeah. Yes. Okay. Okay. We've established that, and now I'm wondering, is there still a connection between you guys?

You guys should just get to know each other now. Well, I mean, I heard a lot about her being a lawyer, and apparently now I just thought it was all fake, but apparently it was all real. Impressive. I feel kind of like I know a little bit about what she does, and I would very much like to go on a real date to know more about her.

Okay. Oh, I mean, I feel like I don't know anything about you, Scott. He's a good liar. Oh, he's got a vivid imagination is what she should take from that. Yeah, that one. What do you actually do for a living, Scott? I'm an engineer. Oh, look at that.

What type of engineer? Are you like a train engineer? Oh, that's true. Like an airplane engineer? Yeah, technical engineer. Because, I mean, there's so much confusion. I just want this to be as clear as possible. Sure i'm an electrical engineer i like the design telephone poles and things of that nature you design poles he's like i got a new idea for this one straight and it's

all work you're a genius scott you'd surprised. A lot that goes into it. I guess so. I bet. Oh, that's cute. I think he's really cute, Lauren. Yeah. I mean, Lauren, what do you think? Like, would you be willing to go out on an actual date with Scott? Because we would pay for it.

Well, I feel kind of bad about ignoring you, considering how this all played out. Maybe coffee? Okay. Oh, absolutely. That'd be great, yeah. Maybe coffee? Okay. Oh, absolutely. That'd be great, yeah. All right. That's sweet. I like it.

Yeah. And we can afford that. We probably can't afford your legal fees, so that works for us. Well, maybe we shouldn't call it a date. I feel like I just need to meet you again for the first time so we can get to know each other a little bit.

Is it cool if I still bring my costume? Kidding. I'm kidding. He's kidding. Funny guy. Look at that. A fake lawyer who turns out to be a real lawyer meets a fake crash test dummy

who turns out to be a real dummy. Yay! It's beautiful. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics,

entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors and with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else ready to laugh and stay informed listen on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts