Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: It's A Fall World After All
Episode Date: October 24, 2022The guy in today’s Second Date feels lucky to be alive after his date to the Carnival. But why were the carnival workers all making fun of him?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information....
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Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You.
This year, it's more you on Bumble.
More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes.
More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them.
More of you dating with intention because you know what you want.
And you know what? We love that for you.
Someone else will too.
Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.
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Where did you have the worst first date of your life?
Oh, that's a big question.
I know for Brooke, it was at a Chuck E. Cheese when she got ditched in the ball pit by her cousin's scooter.
He said he was coming back with pizza for both of them, but nope.
She got out and found him in the arcade playing whack-a-mole with himself.
Oh, wait.
Hey.
Wait, how old were you at Chuck E. Cheese on a day?
Don't judge Scooter.
I started young, okay?
One of our listeners, Henry, says he had his worst first date happen recently at a carnival.
Oh, same.
I mean, very similar to my experience.
We'll hear about that.
Henry, welcome to the show, man.
Hey, man.
Thanks for having me.
Yeah.
Hey.
Okay.
Is this ball pit related?
No, no.
It wasn't the ball pit.
Okay.
Well, we'll get into the details of what happened at the carnival,
but first tell us about the girl that you went out with.
Who's she?
Well, her name's Kylie, and she is freaking gorgeous.
Yeah, right when you said Kylie, I was like, nice.
You know, is there an ugly Kylie out there?
Nope, there's not.
Ugly Kylie's text in to 78592.
Reveal yourself.
We need to know that you're out there.
Seriously.
But what's up? She's gorgeous? She was gorgeous, man. At least text in to 78592. Reveal yourself. We need to know that you're out there. Seriously.
But what's up?
She's gorgeous?
She was gorgeous, man.
So we met on the dating app.
Okay.
And they show up, and you think they're not really going to be as gorgeous as they were in the photos, but she was 100%. So right off the bat, I'm like, all right, this is going to be good.
Oh, okay.
So that makes you excited, not nervous.
Oh, totally. I mean, the average nerves, but I'm like, all right, this is going to be good. Oh, okay. So that makes you excited, not nervous. Oh, totally.
I mean, the average nerves, but I'm excited.
So what did you guys do together at the carnival?
So I figured neither of us had been to a carnival since we were kids.
And let's go be kids.
Let's go play.
Yeah.
It's a cute date idea.
I mean, it's open to a lot of, like, funny moments and also romantic moments.
Yeah.
And that's exactly what both of us thought until we get there.
And I don't know if you remember clearly the carnivals from when you were a kid, but all
of the people that work there are kind of, they look sad.
Yeah.
They kind of look like they're in prison.
I actually noticed that as a child as well.
Yeah. You got to get on their level.
It's not an easy job.
It doesn't seem like a fun job.
I mean, carnies have a stereotype, right?
Why would that ruin your date, though?
Well, it's just a weird environment when you're trying to be on this first date
and you're throwing baseballs at a milk jug that's being run by some strung out neighborhood crackhead.
Oh, wow.
That was a lot of.
I used this milk jug as a pipe 20 minutes ago.
Can you at least smile over there while I'm winning this giant teddy bear, please?
Yeah, come on, man.
I mean, I'm paying you money, so put on this show.
Actually, don't smile because I'm going to see all the teeth that you're missing.
I mean, did you say stuff like that about these people while you were on the date to her?
No, of course not.
Okay, good.
That is rude.
We're kidding.
That would be like the number one reason she would be calling you back.
Honestly, the date was incredible.
Like, we got cotton candy.
We're doing all these rides.
And so this is where it goes bad.
Okay.
You know, you have to get tickets to go on the rides
most rides are five tickets per ride and some are 10 right and at the end of the night we're left
with three tickets okay we're like all right well what are you gonna do with three tickets
and there's this one rankety looking ride left that only costs three tickets
called the circle the seven seas upside Upside Down Pirate Ship.
Oh, the big pirate ships that go around in a circle,
like where it goes back and forth and back and forth. Oh, yeah.
Okay.
So you're strapped in, and you're both facing each other,
and it's flipping over itself.
And I'm a pretty skinny guy,
so maybe I didn't tighten it up enough, but I started to slide through.
Oh, no.
Oh, my God.
That's actually scary.
It was terrifying.
I fell out of my seat onto her.
Oh.
And it's still slipping.
And they don't see this.
They don't stop the ride.
Oh, my God.
Were you injured?
No, not really.
I mean, my spirit.
Your pride is
shaking up. Was she injured? I just imagine
you like slamming into her as
like it flips over. I mean, I'm sure
you wanted to slam into her at some point in the night,
but not like this.
No, I was able to kind of
keep my hands, so I'm just
bouncing at her and she's
screaming and I'm screaming oh my god that's
terrible i guess it's the point of a ride though it's a really little intense the worst part of it
was when it finally stopped yeah the carnival dude opens the cage door and i can fall in and
rolling out of it and she just starts walking and. And I'm like, ah, f***.
The whole night was great
until now, so I'm
trying to apologize, and
I hear one of these dudes say,
well, that was funny.
Oh my god!
Oh, that's awful. That is terrible.
Like it happens a lot to them
or something. Pretty emasculating for that
to happen in front of your date.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And just the fact that I couldn't hold myself in my seat.
I felt like a little kid.
It's not your fault.
Yeah, I know.
It's Gravity's fault.
It's that, you know, Harness's fault.
It's not your fault.
A girl that just randomly be mad at you for something.
Well, it is kind of his fault for choosing the worst ride in the park.
You want to go out on the Ferris wheel so you can calmly kiss on the top, you know?
Duh.
You said that she walked away after that was done.
Like, how did that night end?
We drove home in silence.
I could tell that she didn't want to talk about it.
Yikes, dude.
So you don't think it's like a red flag that she wasn't
concerned? I mean, I would have liked for her to have said something, but honestly, I think she
might've been in shock just as much as I was. All right. Well, let's find out. Maybe she's
had a chance to calm down a little bit and process what happened. We're going to call her
and get your second date update. Find out why she's not calling you back right after this all right thanks hold on second date update
we're in the middle of a second date update with henry who went on a date to the carnival with a
cutie named kylie and they were having a really good time together minus all the sad looking
carnival workers who were totally bumming him out.
Bad vibes, bro. The worst part happened on the final ride of the night when Henry slipped out of the
restraints mid-ride and got rattled around the cage.
Luckily, he's okay, but the mood was definitely killed after that.
Even the guy working the ride laughed when he stepped out saying that was funny.
So, Henry, how bad are you going to feel, though, if you find out Kylie hooked up with that tweaker operating the ride?
Oh, no. We've heard weird things happen on the show. Hopefully that's not the case.
No one is thinking that, Jeff. I just thought it. I think it's an option.
No. Yeah. I mean, I hope that's not the case. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have gone home with that guy.
Okay.
Are you sure?
Because I know Brooke would have.
Yeah, a guy with a job.
Yeah, but my name's Brooke.
I'm not Kylie.
Yeah.
Kylie's probably a good guy.
She was into me.
She was into me for sure.
Okay.
And on the bright side, you cheered up a sad carnival worker for just a few minutes.
You made his day.
That's a good thing.
Slopstick comedy, still funny.
Yeah, well, good for him, but keep in mind,
I almost died in his age of death.
Almost?
But almost.
Yeah, almost.
It was worth it.
Age of death.
Sounds like another fun ride.
Have you texted with her at all,
or has this been no communication?
There has been zero communication.
I texted Juan hoping she would
respond and she has not well hopefully let's get the communication back on track here we're
gonna call her right now and see what she has to say here we go hello hi is this Kylie? It is.
Who's this?
Oh, you mean you can't tell?
Okay.
She does not find it funny.
No, she probably doesn't listen to our show, bro.
I thought maybe a second time might work.
But no, we're a morning show.
We're called Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.
Okay.
Hey, Kylie.
Hi.
Everybody's here.
My co-host, Brooke, Jose, Alexis. Hi. Everybody's here. My co-host, Brooke, Jose, Alexis.
Hi.
There's like, what, four people?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
Hot and good at math.
I like you, Kylie.
We hear you're quite the catch.
Who told you that?
One of our listeners, Henry, who you went out on a date with the other night.
Oh, God. Oh, God.
What exactly is this about?
This is about a segment that we do called a second date update.
And we're hoping to get some answers for why after you guys went to the carnival together,
there's been no communication between you two.
Did he tell you about the carnival?
Yeah. Yeah. Most of it sounded really fun fun yeah the first you had a great time first 95 of the night went really smooth would
you agree with that assessment yes maybe 94 okay sorry don't argue with the math whiz
but that's good i mean that's a pretty good percentage for a date.
The best part was the waffle cheese fries.
I'll tell you that right now.
Just when I think you couldn't get more attractive, Kylie.
Did you have a turkey leg?
Actually, don't answer that.
Let's not get into the food.
I'm going to ask all food questions.
I mean, we're on a mission right now to try and get some answers for why you're not calling Henry back.
Yeah.
And this is
what we know the part that went bad according to henry was when you did the last ride of the night
like the the pirate ship called circle the seven seas the children's ride well aren't they no there
was like uh he described it as like you were locked into a cage and you're both facing each
other and then you flip like the cage flips upside down.
Yeah.
It's a different ride than what you just said.
It sounded pretty intense.
No, that's it.
But it was a children's ride.
What do you mean?
Like a teenage child or like a small child?
Like when they have the small, small roller coasters that don't really do much kind of kid ride?
Like it was only two or three
feet off the ground like we only had like three tickets left to spend and you know it's not going
to be a good ride with three tickets left oh wait so it wasn't a scary ride yeah we're picturing
something enormous that was like 40 feet off the ground tossing you all over the place yeah i
thought it was like the zipper makes that meets ship thing. And it's like almost a
Ferris wheel size or something.
Yeah, no, it was like six to nine-year-olds
around this thing.
Wait, was there a cage in restraints?
Oh, there was restraints,
but I mean, he wasn't even, he was too
big for them. Like, they couldn't even attach
to him because it didn't fit.
Wait, that's not fair.
Like, you guys went on the ride together and the restraints didn't fit him.
I mean, it sounded like it was a scary experience.
From what you're describing, you're talking about an adult ride.
This was not an adult ride.
This was a child ride moving, like, two miles an hour,
barely two feet off the ground.
We were tilted at the most.
Tilted at the most tilted at the most wow
and then suddenly he slipped out and randomly falls on me now i get it that is a bad obviously
a miscommunication here either he's not telling us the whole truth yeah that's the one i'm leaning
towards jeff leaning heavily towards that one okay well let's take his restraints off from the phone line and bring him on.
Because I need to tell you, Kylie, Henry's been on the other line listening this entire time and wants to talk to you.
Henry?
Henry.
Uh, yeah.
What do you have to say for yourself?
Yeah, that's kind of embarrassing, man.
I mean, dude, you didn't tell us it was a children's ride that you got hurt on.
I felt bad for you.
And now I don't.
You didn't ask me if it was a kid's ride or not.
It was scary to me.
The way you described it made it sound like this enormous, crazy experience.
You need to apologize to her.
You guys go in this little bitty cage that you hardly fit in and get spawned in circles like that.
It sounds scary to me, bro.
Fun in circles?
We were tilted to the left, barely.
27 degree angle.
I have a bad equilibrium.
Oh.
Maybe a carnival isn't a great
idea for someone with a horrible equilibrium.
Hey, I have vertigo!
I like how you were calling
all the carnies creepy, and it turns out
that you were the creepy one. I know! I see why
they laughed now. Okay, you guys
are kind of getting mean over here,
because I thought that y'all were trying to
help me out. Well, you weren't
being honest. I mean, you have to admit you just used it as a way trying to help me out. Well, you weren't being honest.
I mean, you have to admit,
you just used it as a way to get close to her. Look, I can see how you all would have heard this
and thought that I was blowing it out of proportion,
but everyone experiences things differently,
and people get scared of different things.
True, yes.
So you're sticking to the you were scared.
I was.
You were.
I was.
If you were so scared, why did you say you wanted to do it again?
You wanted to go again?
Look at that.
Because I wasn't going to go out like that.
I wanted to prove that I'm tough and I'm a man.
Yeah, conquer those fears.
I'm going to get right back on that children's ride and show those five-year-olds who's boss.
You want to see me tilt to the left?
I'll tilt hard.
I'll tilt back to the right even.
Well, she didn't want to get back on the ride.
Yeah.
Kylie, why wouldn't you give him another chance to reclaim his manhood?
Oh, God.
I would have if he was crying more than the seven-year-old who got off the cart beside of us.
Oh, he really was crying.
He was actually scared.
This whole time I thought it was a ploy to get close to you.
Oh, my God.
That's what we're saying.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Sometimes when I land on top of people, I cry too.
And that's totally okay.
And that's why I would love to offer to send you two on another date to someplace with no rides.
Maybe just a restaurant.
Yeah.
And we'll pay for it.
Kylie, what do you say?
You guys would save a lot of money because you'd probably order off the kids menu.
I like how you think, Kylie.
Is that a yes?
Go get some chicken tenders.
I don't think so.
I think I need to.
Come on, Kylie. It'll be fun.
Your definition of fun
is not mine.
Okay, well, fine.
Then I don't...
I didn't want to either.
Yeah.
Kylie, he showed you.
You tell her.
I can't believe you're rejecting this man.
Yeah.
If he's tall enough to ride the ride.
Then what?
He may still cry.
I wasn't even crying that much.
Okay.
It was a manly level of crying.
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Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You.
This year, it's more you on Bumble.
More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes.
More of you finding Gemini is because you know
you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And
you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on
Bumble. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our
ears on The Daily Show, Ears Edition podcast.
Join late night legend Jon Stewart
and the best news team for today's biggest headlines,
exclusive extended interviews, and more.
Now this is a second term we can all get behind.
Listen to The Daily Show, Ears Edition
on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Listen to mini questions on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers.