Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Models & Manchester

Episode Date: June 15, 2022

A professional model says she recently started listening to our show, but is she open to love with one of our listeners?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Second Date Update. This happens every once in a while, but sometimes before a call, I need to warn my co-hosts. Please do not get too excited. Okay.

Do not make any sensual sounds. Don't pre-text your husbands that you're not coming home today. Uh-oh. Because we have a guy on the phone for a second date with an accent. Put the phone down. Put the phone down.

I just need to tell him. No, phone away. I'm just going to be 15 minutes away. She sees a type of divorce. You're going to be home on time. Our listener's name is Charles. Okay. And Charles, now that my co-hosts are braced for it, let's hear your voice. Hello?

Oh, my God. Sweet mashers and bang. I'm more worried about Alexis. She loves British. Yeah, she does. I'm speechless over here. Oh, God. All he said was hello.

Yeah. That's all it takes. And I'm going to say. Oh, God. All he said was hello. That's all it takes. And I'm going to say goodbye. So welcome to the show, Charles, and I'm apologizing ahead of time here. You're literally being sexually harassed. It's totally okay. I mean, I get it all the time here, honestly. It must be a hard life that you live.

Yeah, no wonder you moved here. Before we get into your day, Charles, your email says that you travel around a bit. So apparently it doesn't make it easy for you to meet people. Is that right? Honestly, it's very difficult because, you know, six months of the year I'm over here. And then six months I'm back home in England. And it really makes it hard to make any kind of real connection. Yeah, that would be hard.

I mean, in either place. Because, like, what are you going to do? Like, hang out with somebody for a couple months and be like, oh're going to do long distance for six months that sounds terrible that sounds kind of nice oh distance would be good on and off but you know if it's hard to meet people charles how did you meet the person that you want us to call today so i actually met us through a friend and my my friend was like listen i have this friend who's recently single. And, you know, I was a bit skeptical. Wait, you met her here or you met her back in England? I'm sorry.

Because we can't make international calls. Our station doesn't have the budget for that. We just literally don't have the money. No, it's here. It's all right. Okay, good. And so you were kind of hesitant, you said. I mean, who wouldn't be?

You know, recently single, that normally sets off the alarm bells,'t it okay you're the rebound yeah so let's just say that once she started showing me pictures on a phone those apprehensions kind of went away okay so she was hot enough that you were willing to be her rebound if you yeah well wouldn't you put it that way but yeah okay can we attach a name to this person that you saw yeah her name's melanie melanie okay so did you ask her out so it was kind of like a mutual thing um we decided to meet up at the local pub we call that a bar around here everything's better with an accent that's a classy meetup so we went to the pub. We had a few drinks. We got to know each other, having a nice little conversation.

What did you think about the chemistry between you two? I mean, I thought it went really well, to be honest. Because as soon as she started talking to me, she was just like, oh, my God, I love your accent. Nice. I was like, oh, thank you so much. I never hear that. That's funny. That was funny. You old dog. That was good. oh, thank you so much. I never hear that. That's funny. That was funny.

You old dog, you. That was good. What did you guys connect over? A little bit of everything, to be honest. I mean, we played darts. We played a bit of snooker. A bit of what? What's snooker?

Oh, is that like a different type of pool game or something? Snooker's the British version of pool. Oh, you play pool. Where you put them in your mouth. No. That's your version. Hide the cue. You don't have to explain the rules to us,

but that sounds like a good time. Jack stands everywhere. At one point, she let me know that she's actually a model. Oh, bro. A guy with an accent and a model? Are you kidding me? I'm curious, how did she drop that? I always wonder how people work that into a model. Oh, bro. A guy with an accent and a model? Are you kidding me? I'm curious, how did she drop that?

I always wonder how people work that into a conversation. Was it in her bio or was she really a model? Maybe he never saw a bio because they were hooked up by friends. Right, yeah, okay. She just kind of, you know, we're talking about what we do and she mentioned that she was a model and so

I think anyone would do this in this situation. I was like, oh, do you have any modeling pictures? And she just showed you her Instagram? No, she actually pulled up about these professional-looking photo shoots all in her gallery. Cool. Sounds to me like Charles is getting a little randy. Yeah.

It sounds to me like I can see why she turned down a guy with an accent. She has a lot of options. Yeah. How did things end that night? After a few drinks and after a few laughs, I walked out to her car. You know, I was kind of hoping for, you know, a little goodbye kiss. A little snog. A little snooker.

A little snooker. A little snooker? A little after-hours game of snooker, yeah. Yeah, the Jeffrey version. And? And I was shot down, shall we say. I got the side hug. What? Do you have any idea why she might have turned you down?

I mean, the only thing I can think of is that when she showed me her modeling pictures, I kind of... I'll be honest, I had to pick my jaw up off the floor, you know? Oh. Oh, you may have came across a little thirsty. But that's a flattering reaction. Isn't that what she wants? I would have thought so.

Maybe you just never gave her a compliment. Did you remember to pick your jaw up and, like, say something afterwards? Oh, yeah. I mean, I let her know that she was absolutely gorgeous both in person in fact i even said she was better in person oh that's cute you should have said the d word you were just dashing maybe it sounds better when he says it yeah probably yeah say the word dashing dashing we're gonna go to work for you charles right here we're gonna play a song come back and we're gonna It is pretty good. Why is Jose's pants off? I don't know. We're going to go to work for you, Charles, right here.

We're going to play a song, come back, and we're going to call Melanie for you. And we're going to figure out why she is not calling back the most charming British bloke we have ever spoken to on this show before. Indubitably. Thank you. Thank you so much. Cheerio. We'll do it next. Second date update. Harry Styles, Jude Law, Ronald Weasley.

What do they all have in common? Tell us. Besides the fact Alexis has DM feet pics to all of them, they're all from England. But none of those blokes compare to the British charmer who reached out to us for help today with a second date named Charles. Aw, Charles. I thought Ron was from Hogwarts. They're in England. Yeah, British.

Yeah, they're definitely in England. Oh, okay. Now, Charles spends time on both continents, but recently he got set up with a woman over here, a model named Melanie. Oh, man, it must be so hard to be you, Charles. Melanie is recently single. Oh, she's so excited. Red flag. And after their night out at the pub,

Melanie is now acting like a royal bee. Oh, what? Which stands for boo, because she's ghosting him. Oh, I thought we meant the insect. That's not what it stands for. In our book book it does. Even in, what do you call it, royal English? What do we call his English?

Queen's English. King's English. Yes, thank you. And the whole point of this call is to try and reach out to the royal bee to see if we can reconnect them. Brooke, okay, before we call Melanie, do you have any last thoughts or lewd comments

that you would like to hurl at Charles? I mean, Charles, you actually really liked Melanie, right? Not just because she was super hot. Like, you want a relationship. Yeah, I mean, she seemed like an absolutely lovely... You get that? She's calling you a loose man, Charles. Oh, wow. Our Charles would never, Brooke. I would.

Trust me, I do not look down on the loose part of anything. Oh, wow. Our Charles would never, Brooke. I would. Trust me, I do not look down on the loose part of anything. I don't know. I'm kind of excited for you. I think that you can get this back. I mean, I really hope so, because it is really difficult to meet people if I'm honest. Right. Especially hot models. Difficult for anyone to meet them. Yeah, that too.

I'm a little bit intimidated to call her, but we're going to do it. I'm nervous. That's cute, honey. But here we go. I'm going to dial Melanie, and we're going to get your second date update right now. Hello? Oh. It's in her voice.

This is going to be a tough one. Yeah. Hey, is this Melanie? Yes, this is gonna be a tough one yeah hey is this Melanie yes this is she hey Melanie what's up a lot of people there hi we're the whole show here uh i'm jeff there's everybody else the whole thing is we're calling on behalf of one of our listeners who went on a date with you recently and you're not talking to him afterwards and he doesn't really know why um i feel bad can you specifically say the person's name oh does that mean you're going out with a lot of guys right now she is we know you just got out of a relationship you were set up by your friend oh the british guy okay yes charles is the

one that's trying to get a hold of you but apparently you're not talking to him anymore and he doesn't understand why. I mean, I was a little disappointed in our date. Oh, you were? A little misled, yeah. Was he not as cute as you thought he was going to be or something? I mean, I was told that he was a professional

athlete, so I was thinking... Wait, what? You were told that he was a what a professional athlete oh we never asked tell us that well i'm is he not because we never asked him if he was i don't we have no idea it makes sense six months in and out it's a season well i mean i was assuming he played football you know soccer of soccer and tennis. Yeah, soccer. Okay. I mean, this guy's a professional dart player. Dart? Yeah.

Is that a bad thing, though, when you say that? It's bad for him to be a professional dart player? I just expected someone tall and athletic and not like a normal guy that plays darts at a bar. I don't know. Oh, that's a burn. I just feel like if it's not in the Olympics, it's not a bar. I don't know. Oh, that's a burn. I just feel like if it's not in the Olympics, it's not a sport.

I don't know. Wait a minute. So he wasn't, like, chiseled with a six-pack? I mean, so that was a disappointment to you? I think definitely. And you couldn't get over it? As much as I really, really like Tom Holland, I just wasn't expecting Tom Holland. Oh.

He's like an average-looking guy. But Zendaya loves Tom Holland, and look how awesome she is. Zendaya. Zendaya, yes. You can try and sound young all you want, Brooke, but no one's going to be. I'm just saying, Melanie, you could be that cute couple. You could be the Zendaya to the Tom Holland. Okay, let's get off of Tom Holland and Zendaya, and let's focus on Charlotte. It's Zendaya,endaya to the Tom Holland Okay let's get off of Tom Holland and Zendaya

and let's focus on Charlotte Who cares I'm trying to sell him Well now's the perfect chance to have that conversation with him because Charles is actually on the other line listening right now and wants to talk to you Oh gosh

Tom Holland's here Charles you there? Hi Melanie Oh, gosh. Tom Holland's here. Charles, you there? Hi, Melanie. Hello? Hi. It's a little awkward. I have to just correct you on something.

I am a professional athlete. Where I'm from, darts is, it's renowned. It takes focus. It takes dexterity. It takes athleticism. You have to be a top-tier human being to be this good at darts. How good are you? He's got strong fingers.

I mean, I'm the top player in all of England. What? No way. Really? Dude, so, like, people in England know your name? I get stopped in the street when I walk through London. Wow. That's the people on SportsCenter. Like they're huge in England, but then they come out here

and no one knows who the heck they are. Melanie, does that make up for his lack of biceps and abs? I mean, I never said anything about his biceps or abs. Right, because they weren't there. But he sounds like everybody knows him, that he's a pretty big deal over in England.

You mentioned that darts isn't on the Olympics. Not yet. Okay. There's a whole movement there, but that's not the point. Over here, I am dominating the competition. Oh, I bet. Soon he's going to be posing like half naked in a Calvin Klein hat, I bet. prove to her that you are of the caliber that she was expecting like you're not insulted that she may be looking for more surface things well like i didn't question her about being a model

i didn't say hey you're a model get up there on the catwalk give us a 12 yeah face value i'm sitting here you know i am an athlete maybe not the one she envisioned but i don't need to prove myself to have to have my profession just kind of pushed aside. You know, it's a little insulting. Okay. Does it sound a little bit like Tiny Tim wants another bowl of porridge? What?

Jeffrey. That was so random. I don't even know what that means, but. Of course you know, you're a model. I do feel bad that he feels disrespected, so. I do apologize bad that he feels disrespected. Okay. I do apologize. But my picture of a professional athlete is definitely different than

what you are as a dart player. Well, sometimes the best things in life come in a small package. Wait a minute. Are you admitting something? That's not a great phrase to say over here, Charles. I had a lot of fun, Melanie.

And to be honest, I kind of want to continue that. Kind of. Continue the fun. Well, you can continue it on our bill because we will pay for the next date you guys go on if you both agree. Melanie? If someone's going to try this hard to get my attention by calling the radio to call me, I got to give you a second chance. Hey! Oh my God, you guys.

Also, if he is a professional athlete, I think maybe he should be able to pay for the date, right? Oh, I thought you didn't care about the money. I mean, even rich people like free things, I think. Yeah, Brooke would know. Oh, I mean, I think I shouldn't have to do that if he says he makes so much money. Yeah, but he probably doesn't have a gift card to the Cheesecake Factory. We'll toss one in there. I don't think I know about the Cheesecake Factory.

Is that something I should look into? Charles, that's going to blow your frickin' knickers off, dude. That is a cultural awakening. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Man, after that, I think we all deserve to get knighted. Is that what happens when you help an English person? Alexis, you know. I've never been knighted, so.

Oh, you've only been dumped by an English person. That's right. Come on, they hook up all the time. I'm just waiting now for a call from Buckingham Palace for telling this British guy about the Cheesecake Factory. You know the second he goes in there, he's going to eat a few slices and immediately lose his accent. He's going to blame us for it. Wait a minute, it's Cherry Pie? I love this one.

I'm still impressed with us. I don't know. I can't believe he wasn't more upset with her. Yeah. Dudes are so shallow, too. He was totally fine that she only wanted him for his money. I was going to say, it's still fishy to me that once he mentioned, well, I'm the number one player in England, I make a bunch of money. They both travel a lot.

They probably cheat on each other. Yeah, that's a good point. That's true. I mean, they both know what they're getting into. Yeah. Yeah. Alexis would know. That's would know But I'm still impressed I'm taking it as a win

We hooked up a British person and a really beautiful person They always need help It's very hard to find love for them And if you need help right now you can always email us We'll call the person who isn't calling you back Jon Stewart is back in the host chair At The Daily Show Which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late night

legend John Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.