Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: Bathroom Break

Episode Date: March 21, 2014

We've heard our share of embarrassing first dates on this show... but could it be... we have finally heard THE MOST EMBARRASSING ONE OF ALL TIME?? OMG. You need to hear what happened to Desiree in today's Second Date Update.(Image Courtesy: ZakVTA. Creative Commons)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money Podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch

your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast.

Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all.

Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. Moving 92.5. Ruck and Jubels, second date update. I can empathize with today's second dater because Desiree, who's on the phone with us right now,

is much like me. She has a teeny tiny little bladder. Oh, I thought you were going to say something else. Isn't that right, Desiree? Yes, I can't help it. Desiree, hey, listen, I understand your problem completely. I go to the bathroom like every five seconds. And apparently on Desiree's first date, she thinks that might have been an issue. And I can tell you from experience, Desiree, as a guy who's been on dates before and has to get up every five seconds to use the bathroom, it is in the back of your head like,

oh my God, they're going to think I'm in the bathroom doing coke, like I'm a drug addict or something. You start making excuses for it. Like, I'm sorry, I just had too much water today. I don't know. I have to go to the bathroom this much. I promise I'm not doing weird things. How many times did you get up to use the bathroom during your date?

Oh my gosh, at least five, maybe six. Oh, man. I've been there. It, at least five, maybe six. Oh man. I've been there. It's terrible. Like, I can't help it. Like, I got there early thinking I can get like my head straight, you know, I'm going to check out the surroundings, I'm going to have a couple drinks, like relax a little bit because I was so nervous.

And then I was like, oh gosh, you've had three drinks and he's not even here yet. So that's great. Did you tell him that you were going to the bathroom every one of those times? And what was his reaction by the sixth? Yeah, because, I mean, we were sitting at the bar. I was like, I'm going to say, oh, I have to make a phone call. Like, so I had to tell him that I was going to the bathroom. And I was just like, oh, I'm so sorry.

You know, like just trying to apologize and excuse myself. But, like, how do but how do you cover that? I'd like to see you and me on a date together, Desiree. Neither of us would be at the table ever. The date would be in the bathroom. It would just be non-stop bathroom trips. But I've done that, and you have to start making excuses. You're just like, oh, and you try to make awkward jokes about having to go to the bathroom every five seconds.

It sucks. Right? Now, you said that you think that might have been a problem on the date. First of all, let's learn about the guy that you went out with what's his name will well yes how'd you meet him i was getting my nails done and my nail tech who was like super sweet she was like you would be perfect for my son so how would you feel about going on a blind date with him and i was like really weirded out because i mean mean, I don't know this guy. This dude's mom set him up with you, basically.

Yeah. So I was like, wait, does he still live with you? She said, no, he has his own place. But, no, she set us up, and we, like, met up at the bar. And it was great. Like, he was so great, too. I thought it was going really well except for the fact that I kept leaving. Did he seem sympathetic at all when you were saying that?

Or did he seem upset? He kind of laughed it off the first couple times. And then, like, by, like, the fourth time, he started to get, like, a little annoyed. Almost, like, a little frustrated. But, like, what am I supposed to do? You got to go. You got to go, right? Yes.

And it's the worst part is when you're on one of those dates and you're somebody like myself or Desiree who has to go to the bathroom and you try to hold it forever because then you can't pay attention to what they're talking about and you're all fidgety. So then, yeah, they're like, this person is on drugs. They've been to the bathroom five times and now they won't stop itching themselves. You know? Or your knee is bouncing

under the table. They won't stop because you want to go. So how did your date end with him then? Well, like by the fifth, sixth time they came back from the bathroom,

we sat and talked like awkward. It got like a little awkward and then he just kind of was like, well, you know, starting to get a little late,

I better go. And it was only like 930. So, oh, it was like awkward. Did you guys hug or kiss or anything? It was a,

it was a hug. It was a quick hug and then, you know hug or kiss or anything? It was a hug. It was a quick hug. And then, you know, he walked me out, and then we just kind of went our separate ways. All right. I'm assuming not a handshake, because he's like, I don't know if she washed her hands or not. Oh, my God. And you haven't heard from him at all? No.

I texted him to see, you know, because I didn't want to call him and be like, that girl. So I texted him, but I haven't heard anything back. Okay. Well, we're going to play a song, come back, call him, and see if we can get him on the phone and get your second date update, okay? Oh, my gosh. Thank you. Thank you.

It might seem crazy what I'm about to say. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Second date update. You know Desiree? Yeah. No matter what happens in today's Second Date Update, I think after it, you and I are going to start a support group for pee-challenged individuals. Oh, that's so nice.

You can't have any water or refreshments at this group. That's definitely true. You might not think it's a bad thing, but, you know, it's annoying when you go out with somebody and have to pee every five seconds. My friends get annoyed. My family gets annoyed. My girlfriend gets annoyed with me. They all get angry because I have to go to the bathroom every five seconds. And that's what Desiree did on her first date. And that's what she think ruined it with Will. Right, Desiree?

Yes. Don't worry. I got your back. Thank you. Yeah. All right, are you about ready to give Will a call and see if your frequent bathroom trips did, in fact, ruin your date? Yes. Okay.

At least you know if that's the reason he's not calling you back. It's nothing you could really help. Right, exactly. Yeah. Thank you. All right, here we go. You can find a guy that's more your speed. Yeah. Thank you. Alright, here we go. You can find a guy that's more your speed. R. Kelly or something.

Alright, here we go. Hello? Hey, can I speak to Will? This is Will. Hey Will, how are you? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning. I'm moving at 82.5. I'm good. What's up, man?

Well, I mean... Will, are you familiar with our show? Yeah, I'm curious why you're calling me. I'm calling you because somebody emailed us to do a second date update on you. Yeah. Okay. That person's name is Desiree. Okay.

Do you remember your date with Desiree? Yes. She thinks that her frequent urination kind of was off-putting to you, and that's why you don't want to give her a call back. Is that what screwed up your date with Desiree? That was definitely annoying. Was that it, though? I mean, let's say yes and just leave it at that.

Oh, come on, man. You can't do that to us. We can't leave it at that because Oh, come on, man. You can't do that to us. We can't leave it at that because there's obviously more to it. I don't know. I mean, I don't want to say anything on the radio. Yeah, but Will, she's the one that emailed us and is taking the risk of something being said about her. So if you think it's going to embarrass her, then it's kind of her fault. Plus, she already put it out there that she has to pee every three seconds.

Yeah, it can't be more embarrassing than that. Well, I mean, I guess you're right, but I just don't really want to speak ill of her. What didn't you like about her? She was off in the bathroom. I don't know if it was the 4th or the 7th or whatever time it was. I'm sitting alone at the table, and I adjusted her drink, and I knocked her purse off the table by accident. Okay.

And, you know, I picked it up and put it back on the table, and when I put it on the table, it started vibrating. What started vibrating? The purse. Okay, well, that could be a problem. Is it what I think it is?

Why did it start vibrating? Well, I mean, I thought it was a cell phone for a second, and then it just kept going. So I looked in there just to figure out what was going on, and it wasn't a cell phone i just want to see him sitting at the dinner table holding that thing in his hand trying to turn it off i didn't hold it i reached in there i mean i've seen that thing before are you sure that's what like you think she's just carrying that around in her purse wherever she goes in case something pops off woman that would be weird i don't really know why i mean i feel bad for it i don't really know why. I mean, I feel bad for it. I don't even know why it was in there.

You're positive it couldn't be, like, I feel like there's a lot of weird electronic products, you know, like those back rubbers or whatever, you know, there's, like, all weird things. Yeah. Could it be one of those? This was not for rubbing backs. Okay. Well, you and I are very opposite. Had I found that in someone's purse, I'd be like, yes, thank you.

This is amazing. Well, this thing was gigantic. Oh, my God. That's more what it was. You were scared. You had to... Stop, stop, stop. Oh, my gosh, stop.

Oh, my God. Will, Desiree's actually on the other line right now. You know that. She's listening. Will, oh, my God. Look what youiree's actually on the other line right now. You know that. She's listening. Oh, my God. Look what you just said about it. Seriously, who goes into a girl's purse? It fell over.

Well, but you don't need to, like, what, and she just, like, ignore it. It was unignorable. It's not like it had that many settings. You know, I don't really want to get into it. I'm sorry that you had to hear that. I mean, you're a nice girl, and your private life is your own. I'm fully, I think you should by all means do what you like, you know? I just didn't know what to say desiree is what he says

true are you packing i mean i guess you can't like cover it up now but like listen it was a prank for a friend of mine right she was like you should take it. It'd be really funny. That kind of thing, you know? I don't believe her. Seriously. You don't ever do things like that? Like, you think it's funny with your friends, and then you just, like, do it? Yeah. Nope. No, not

friends that I want to keep. I keep one of those on me all the time, but for the right reasons, so. Whoa! Gross! Oh, gross. Hey, Will, do you believe her? Do you believe her that that was all a prank? Hey, man, you know, whatever. I don't really care.

Okay, Will, is it that big a deal to you that she has alone time or whatever she does with it? No, it wasn't because of that. It was a prank. It was a prank. It was a prank. I don't know. You guys are painting, like, the worst picture of me right now. It really wasn't mine.

Like, what do I have to do to convince you guys that it was not mine? Desiree, if it wasn't, did one of your friends throw it in your purse, like, right before you walked in the restaurant? Don't you think that's something you might want to put in your car before you go in? You forget these things, you know? No i think i remember i kind of wish you would just own it and be like yeah it was me i brought it i tell you one thing i will never forget that thing it really really wasn't mine okay desiree sure this is stupid it was just Hey, Will, would you like to go out on a second date with Desiree? I will pay for it.

I don't think so. No? Will. Come on, Will. I think we have different views of the beginning. I think Will was just intimidated by what was in her purse. Got a lot to live up to, my friend. He doesn't want to compete with Beast Mode.

That's the problem. Broken Jubal in the morning. Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up. Well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt.

And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast.

From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC.

Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen.