Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: Bookstore Friend Zone

Episode Date: March 10, 2021

Getting friend zoned is awkward and confusing, and one of our listeners is worried the guy she’s VERY interested just wants to be friends. Can we help them become maybe a little more?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Welcome to My Legacy. I'm Martin of King III, and together with my wife, Andrea Waters King, and our dear friends, Mark and Craig Kilberger, we explore the personal journeys that shape extraordinary lives. Join us for heartfelt conversations with remarkable guests like David Oyelowo, Mel Robbins, Martin Sheen, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, and Billy Porter. Listen to My Legacy starting January 20th on MLK Day on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Bread and butter wines pair with the life moments you love.

Offering a rich and jammy Cabernet Sauvignon, a silky smooth Pinot Noir, and a buttery Chardonnay. Bread and butter wines are delicious. Find bread and butter wines in your favorite store. Moving 92.5. Second date update. Have you ever been out somewhere and seen like one of those old phone booths that's still around? And you're like, oh my God, I forgot about those.

Seriously, my kids came across one not long, and they didn't know what it was. Yeah. What do you do with that? Why are there so many buttons? It's like when you walk into a business, and they have a fax machine in the office, and you're like, wow, did I step back in time? Oh, my God. Pinch me.

One of our listeners says she met a guy in an old-fashioned kind of place. All right. Her name is Kara, and she emailed our show for help. Hey, Kara, what's up? Hey, guys. How are you? I feel like you met him at the mall or something. Tell us about the guy that you met.

What's his name, and where did you meet him? So his name is Clinton, and we actually met at a bookstore. Oh. Clinton. That is old-fashioned. That's cute. Yeah, I can't believe those are still around. Hey, support

your local bookstores. The independent ones, awesome. I thought I'd get a big cheer. We throw a parade or something. I'm not a big reader. What happened with you and Clinton? How did you end up meeting?

We actually were in the same book aisle. I'm really into Dolores Cannon. She was like a medium, kind of into that metaphysical stuff. My favorite medium. Oh, nice. Jose doesn't know what he's talking about. Don't tell her. She believed me.

Come on. So he was into that world too? Well, yeah, apparently. So, yeah, he kind of approached me first and you know we were just talking about the books that we were into and we probably talked for a good i don't know 20 minutes okay and then he actually asked me for my number cute oh okay oh my god was your heart like pumping right then it was it was so like kind of like movie scene. It was really kind of cool, you know. So what did you guys end up doing when you went out for a date or was this the date?

Well, we were texting. We texted for like a week trying to set up a date. We just really couldn't get our schedules together. And so this was kind of really ironic. The book that I had purchased that day, when I took it home, it was ripped in the back and I didn't realize it whenever like the last few pages were ripped so I just wanted to return it and um when I returned the book he was there again oh yeah so we just chit-chatted for a minute and then you know we finally set up the date and the like the other thing that's kind of odd is our date was at a coffee shop that was actually near that bookstore okay and I'm like I don't know like I I'm just feeling some type of way because I want to kind of get out of that scene like I'm really into this guy but I feel

like so wait did you do the coffee date yeah yeah how was that I mean did there was no flirting it felt friendly I was flirting but I don't there was no flirting. It felt friendly. I was flirting. But I don't know. This is why I need your help because I'm really bad at this. I don't know if maybe it's just my paranoia that's getting to me. But I want to, like, go out with him. Like, let's take a night and get all dressed up and go out and really get to know each other.

And so this, like, coffee shop stuff. So you're saying you weren't impressed with his date decisions and you were looking for something a little more elaborate. Maybe like a dinner and a movie. Something. I think it sounds like she wants to go drinking with him and have a real good one is what it sounds like to me. Coffee date or like breakfast and lunch, a little friend-zoney, you know? Yeah. I mean, breakfast is only sexy if it's the next morning. Yeah.

Right? Yeah, totally. Okay, but so since your disappointing coffee date, has he tried to reach out to you at all? I mean, we texted just like silly little messages here and there. He's not like blowing me off completely. I just don't feel like he wants like an actual like go out on the town date. I know that vibe. I know that vibe. Why do you feel that though? Because he hasn't really taken me out. It's an effort.

It's just really strange because, you know, he asked me for my number, but the couple of times that I've seen him, you know, we were surrounded at books or coffee and it's not really like progressing in a more romantic way. I like that. So you're taking charge of the situation. Yeah. You want to at least move from the coffee shop to the Cinnabon. Like at least move up one level.

You know, at this point, I would totally take Cinnabon over another coffee shop. So are you looking for us to try to switch his mind on the friend zone thing? Or do you just want an explanation? Well, both. I would like an explanation and I mean, I really would like to have something more with this guy. I'm really into him. He seems really cool.

He's not really the type of guy that I would go out with, so I think I'm really fascinated with that because I usually date, you know, jockey kind of guys. Yes, wealthy men. No, she said jockey. She likes little guys that ride horses. Oh, I see. Okay, well, let's find out what's going on with this guy.

We're going to play a song. We'll come back. We'll call him and try and get your second date update. Okay, Kara? Thank you. All right, hold on. If you're just tuning in for the second date update, one of our listeners, Kara, met a guy named Clinton at a bookstore

while they were perusing the same aisle for reading materials. And they ended up hanging out at a coffee shop near the bookstore. And she found out she really likes him. And right now they are texting. But she feels like she's not getting the vibe that he wants to continue to pursue their connection and go on a bigger, more romantic-style date. And she's not really sure why that is. So she's reached out to us for help. And Kara, I was thinking about this during the break.

Have you ever considered that you might not be sending him strong enough romantic vibes where he'll know that you're interested? Because guys just aren't very good at reading signs in women. I actually never thought of that. That's not a bad idea, Jeffrey. Sometimes you really have to paint a clear picture for us. So if it comes down to it, Kara, are you willing to wear sexy lingerie in the bookstore

to really just send the message so that Clinton knows for sure, hey, I'm interested in more than just a coffee hangout. How do you feel about that, Kara? I mean, I could go in with an overcoat on and... What? Hey! A little librarian role play. Dude, I like this.

Kara, if he's that dumb, I mean, come on. Did I just drop my bookmark? Whoopsies. You have to pick it up. All of a sudden, Jose is taking up reading. Yeah. Very strange. Very strange.

Clinton will take it to a four-star restaurant after he sees that. Hey, there you go. I mean, I'm willing to really do anything. I just, you know, want to see where he's at with this. Okay. Okay, we're good. You go log on to some, like, Victoria's Secret websites. There you go.

And I'll talk to Clinton while we do that, okay? I'll also log on to Victoria's Secret while we're doing this. Oh, my God, yes. All right, it's just in case. It's obviously Savage Fenty that everybody's buying. Oh, sorry, my bad. You know what that is. You go find that.

We're going to dial Clinton's phone number. You ready to do this? She's on the website. Yeah, okay, she's searching. All right, good. I'm dialing the number right now. Here we go. Hello?

Hi, I'm looking to speak with Clinton. This is him speaking. Who's this? Hey, Clinton, my name's Jeffrey from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. You have a second to talk with us? Um, I guess? So, we do a segment on our show called the Second Date Update. That's where, if you go out with someone, someone and afterwards if that person isn't calling you back you can email us and we'll reach out to your date for you to figure out why they've been avoiding you okay and so we got an

email recently from a girl who says she had a very nice time hanging out with you and she's hoping to pursue more of a romantic connection her name is cara oh okay and i guess it's not like totally normal because she did say you guys have been texting back and forth it's not like yeah you haven't ghosted or anything she hasn't accused you of that yeah no carrie's a great girl um yeah why is that bad anytime she's great that's friend zone dude what are you talking about What do you want her to say? Never met a hot girl that I wanted to hook up with that I'm like, she's great. Okay, I see. It's the tone of when you say great.

It's like, oh, she's awesome. Oh, yeah, I like her. Like, she's great is good, but like, she's great. Yeah, if he's not saying it like Tony the Tiger, he's not into her, dude. You guys, just ask him. Are you friend zoning her? I mean, I'm just getting to know her, and, you know, that's just kind of how it's been going. Okay.

Okay. Taking things slow. I mean, to be fair, Kara thinks that you're great, too. And she really wants to get to know you more. It sounds like an insult. It doesn't. It doesn't. She had a nice time hanging out with you.

But if she's being completely honest, she feels like you're not that interested in taking things further. Is that true? I wouldn't say that's true. I'm definitely interested, but there's just some things that I'm taking my time with and just being a bit protective of the situation. You need to break up with your current girlfriend. Yeah, that does sound like what you're saying. Yeah, why are you hesitating? When you the situation. You need to break up with your current girlfriend. Yeah, that does sound like what you're saying. Yeah, why are you hesitating? When you say situation. Are you single?

Oh yeah, I am. I'm single. Okay, good. Okay, so when did you plan on calling her and taking her out again? We've been talking and trying to, you know, coordinate our schedule. It's just been a bit tough. That's the thing. She's tired of talking. She wants to do something with you.

I mean, you've got to understand, too. Like, people are jaded in the dating world right now, right? She feels like you're going to ghost her is what it feels like. You know, the entire situation with Kara, it's really been gnawing at me. And I obviously, I'm not sure on how to discuss it with her. But it is something that, you know, it's been bothering me. I do eventually want to talk to her about it. OK, OK. So there is something underlying for why you're taking your time with this. Would you mind telling us about it? Maybe we could help you through it.

You can even be really general about it. You don't have to get too specific. Sure. But we're trying to help out one of our listeners. I mean, she's worried if this goes on any longer, it's going to end up in the friend zone for her, too. So let's fix this now. Okay, well, I don't know how much she's told you guys in terms of how we met and whatnot, but we met at this bookstore

and it was a might sound cheesy, but a really magical moment. That is cute. She did say that it felt like it was like a movie scene, like it was a meet cute. might sound cheesy, but a really magical moment. Yes! This is all good! That is cute. She did say that it felt like it was like a movie scene. Yeah. Like it was a meet-cute.

So what's the problem? Well, the issue is I actually was heading to work when we met, and where I was heading to work is actually at that bookstore. And I didn't want her to know that I work there because it just felt like it would have ruined the moment. It was just such a great moment. And so, you know, we've been meeting. We've met a couple of times.

And I know that it's usually around the bookstore. Why? I don't understand. I'm not understanding. Why would it be bad if she knows that you work at the bookstore? I don't get that either. I don't get that either. I don't know. I just, it's not the most attractive job position, especially considering getting to know her in the brief time that we have spent together.

A lot of the guys that she's dated, you know, they've had a bit more real type of jobs and now I, and now I feel a bit conflicted because we've known each other now for a little bit over a month and I feel like I should have just told her from the beginning, and now it feels awkward, and I don't know how to tell her. That is so sweet. It really is. But I also think you shouldn't compare yourself to the guys she dated in the past. Those guys obviously didn't work out, and she's a book lover. What could be better? She gets discounts. I mean, rad.

I'm sort of using him. To be fair, she kind of should compare him to the other guys from the past based on the type of dates that she says that she wants. I mean, I would hope that she would be understanding. I just don't want this to be a deal breaker, and I kind of feel like now it's a bit too far. You're so,

you're too deep. Well, I mean, I do wonder how Cara feels about this, because actually actually I need to let you know, Clinton, that she's on the other line listening and wants to talk to you. Wait. Oh, yeah. I forgot. You guys can talk to each other.

Yeah. Weird. Oops. This is good, Clinton. Wait, she's been listening to me this whole time? Yes. Yeah, she's on the line. Don't be bad.

You there? Oh, my God. I'm here. Clinton, hi. Oh, my God. You're okay, bro. Hey my god hey cara listen this is so awkward i'm actually so relieved like if that's really the reason please don't be embarrassed i think that's awesome like i mean it's nice to hear you say that that makes you happy and whatnot but i don't know if you remember the conversation we had about the other guys

who dated and the jobs that they've had, not necessarily on the bookstore level. So I just thought that was a – Yeah, but they treated me not well. So I don't – job status doesn't really matter to me. I mean, as long as you're a decent person. Well, okay. I mean, that's great to hear, but I just want you to know, like, it's not, you know, I work at a bookstore.

Like, I don't make a lot of money there. It's not like I take you to fancy places like you're used to and whatnot. So. Hey, you get a 20% discount at that bookstore cafe. Don't sell yourself short. Hey, come on. We can definitely get you a discount. Yo, I got you a croissant on me, girl.

You guys, women work. We have our own money. She can take you out. I'm a simple girl. I don't really need wine and dined all the time, maybe just every once in a while. You know, I've wanted to do that, and I've wanted to take you out. It's just been a bit tough with my schedule, but I hope that we can definitely make that happen, especially now that you know what's going on.

All right. Well, I mean, this sounds like it's going well. It's really. Clinton, I have a red lobster gift card with your name on it. Oh, yes. Show me those cheddar biscuits. I mean, we're really moving up here. Would you like to go out on another date with Kara?

We will pay for it. I would love to go out with her. And that's very generous of you guys. But I should let you know I am allergic to shellfish. Show them all a nugget. You can just get the sides of spinach. And the cheddar biscuits. I think they're fine. We have a lot of gift cards. We'll find one that doesn't serve seafood,

and you guys can go there. I would love that. I appreciate that. Oh, you guys are so cute. Are you excited, Kara? I mean, I was excited, but the shellfish thing is kind of a deal breaker for me. What? Oh, no.

Just kidding. Just kidding. She's got jokes. Yeah, she does. All right. Well, congratulations, you two. Thank you. Thanks so much, guys.

I love love. But definitely hold on to that lingerie, okay, Kara? Oh, okay. Wait, what lingerie? Oh, you'll find out soon, bud. Don't worry. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Ugh, we're so done with new year, new you.

This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you.

Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears

with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to My Legacy. I'm Martin Luther King III, and together with my wife,

Andrea Waters King, and our dear friends, Mark and Craig Kilberger, we explore the personal journeys that shape extraordinary lives. Join us for heartfelt conversations with remarkable guests like David Oyelowo, Mel Robbins, Martin Sheen, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, and Billy Porter. Listen to My Legacy starting January 20th on MLK Day on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.