Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: Divorces Do It With Baggage

Episode Date: February 21, 2017

We've all had that ONE CRUSH that never quite worked out...maybe the timing was off or whatever... but what would you do if the universe gave you a second chance? That's kind of what happened to the guy in today's second date update...hear whether it turns out to be a love story or disaster by hearing the podcast.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you by the IHOP Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from.

Are you looking for the thrill of your life? With ZodArt, Seattle's only exotic car rental company, you can book a Lamborghini, Ferrari, and more. Visit ZodArt.com, Z-A-D-A-R-T.com, to book your exotic car ride. Moving 92.5. Rook and Jubels second date update.

You know dating is a lot like shopping at the grocery store for a grapefruit. What?

You can either sift through all the grapefruits to try to find that perfect one or you can

take the easy way and just grab one of the ones on the outside that's been kicked around a little bit. It's a little damaged. It's a lot easier just to go for one of those grapefruits. You know, sure, it might have some bugs and some bruises.

But it's still a grapefruit. And that's what Huxley did today. Huxley's a man after my own heart and decided to go after the damaged grapefruit. Still working on this analogy. Hey, Huxley, what's the grapefruit's name? The grapefruit's name, she's an actual woman. Her name's Alicia. Alicia, all right. Tell us a little bit about Alicia. So Alicia and I go, like, way, way back.

We were good friends in college, and I was always, like, that guy that had a crush on her. Okay, wait. So you're the damaged grapefruit, or she's the damaged grapefruit? Well, I guess in this scenario, we're both damaged grapefruit. A couple of damaged grapefruits trying to go out and have a good time. Aw. Yeah. I always had a crush on Alicia.

She's always been like the most attractive girl. So she, of course, always had a boyfriend. And every single time that something would happen with her and her boyfriend i was always the guy that was there for her oh well you're trying to position yourself right well no i i did have a crush on her but i swear brooke there was no like agenda i'm a i'm a really good grapefruit i'm one of the ones on the inside. So anyway, tattoo, present day. I see over Facebook that she got a divorce recently, and I saw maybe like a potential opening. You saw that she'd been divorced, and you're like, just damaged enough now that I could probably date her.

Yeah, well, to be honest, I thought about some of the good times we had in college and figured, why not reach out? I did see like a little bit of an opening that maybe something could develop. Like she's single, I'm single. There's really no reason why not. And you guys had kind of dropped off in terms of your friendship post-college. Yeah, she got married pretty early on. And then I left and moved like a couple hundred miles away. I mean, keeping in touch today is like so easy.

But back then it wasn't like that easy, I guess. So yeah, we kind of fell out of touch with each other. And I decided, yeah, like I said, to reach out. And then to my surprise, reached back out to me after I messaged her over Facebook. Did you proposition this as a date? No. Well, I just kind of like shared my condolences, you know, on her divorce. That's never easy.

And we started to like chit chat back and forth. And eventually I did ask her to like, you know, maybe we should meet up for drinks. She thought that was a good idea. Okay. But do you know, did she consider it a date when you guys went out? I didn't cross that boundary because I didn't know how fresh the divorce was. And I didn't know she would be kind of turned off if I asked her on a formal date. You should have just sent her a message on Facebook that simply said,

Break up sex with a question. Yeah. I don't know if that would have worked. Keep that in mind for next time, all right? So did you guys actually get together? We did, yeah. We met at a bar. And when I saw her walk through the door,

it was like a total flashback to college, and a lot of feelings were immediately felt by me. She did not age at all. I was smitten, I guess. I don't know. I was taken aback. It was cool. It was a cool moment.

So how did drinks go? It was good. We had a couple drinks. We caught up. And then she kind of opened up to me about her marriage because I knew the guy. And actually, her vulnerability allowed me to open up about my divorce that I had, too. So how did everything end with you guys? Well, I mean, we had another drink and we decided to call it a night and on my way out the door I still was venting a little bit about my breakup which was nothing like hers my marriage only

lasted like a year and that ended like seven years ago which it's not even on my radar I don't even know why I said this next thing but while we were walking out the door I admitted that the last six months of my marriage we didn't even even, like, have sex at all. Okay. Right when I said it, it was like word vomit. You feel like that was too much information for her? Yeah. She played it real cool, and she was real nice about everything, but it's like one of those moments where you, like, speak too much.

And now, like, you can't take those words back. And I felt like maybe that's the reason why she hasn't called or texted me back, because it was a good date other than that. Okay, but did she know it was a date? Yeah, it doesn't sound like a date. It doesn't sound like it, yeah. Well, for me, it was a date. It was nice. You know, I did ask her, like, I said while we were leaving that we should hang out again as like a formal date invitation you know so you said quote as a formal date invitation no i'm not i'm a grapefruit not a

robot i i said like we should hang out again this was fun again that doesn't sound like a date well like the way i said it though was like there was like a vibe. I was sending some signals out that it was like more than just friends. And what did she say to that? She said, yeah, and she was like enthused and it was cool. And and that was the last I heard of Alicia. You know, like I reached out to her again on Facebook to try to put some dates on the calendar so we could go out. And then I haven't heard from her. And on Facebook, you can see when they've seen your message.

And I know she's seen the messages, which is. Have you sent her a message in all caps saying, I know you're seeing these answer. I'm teaching you a lot of good tools here, Huxley. I like that advice. Yeah, you're laying down some good stuff. I am writing it down. We'll play a song, come back, call her and get your second date update. Okay. Awesome. Thank you so much. Yeah, man're laying down some good stuff. I am writing to them. Well, play a song, come back, call her, and get your second date update, okay? Awesome.

Thank you so much. Yeah, man. Hang on. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Second date update. Hey, Huxley, I think this second date update is going to work out for you. Oh.

Really? Yeah, I do. Well, you know, because the girl that you want to call, she just went through a divorce. You went through a divorce. I think once you guys talk it out, you both will realize you don't have many options. And at the end of the second date, she will agree to go out with you again because, hey, why not? No. That's what I'm thinking.

Because she's just finally giving up. That's really nice of you. I like that, Jewel. Thank you. Yeah. Keep me on. It's nice. If you're just tuning in for the second date update, Huxley is on the phone.

He wants to call a girl named Alicia. They actually have known each other since college. They kind of fell off a little bit after college. But he always had a crush on her. She always had a boyfriend. Then she got married. He recently saw on Facebook that she was divorced. And they started chatting.

And he said, hey, we should go out and talk and hang out. They did. But now she's not responding to him. And maybe, have you thought about this, Huxley? Maybe your date was so bad that she went back into the arms of her ex. Oh, no!

The second date update is doing wonders for my confidence. Yeah, sounds like it. No problem, man. All right, I'll dial her phone number right now. Here we go. Hello. Hi, is this Alicia? Yeah, this is Alicia. Hi, Alicia. This is Jubal and I host a radio show called Brooke and Jubal in the morning.

What? My name is Jubal and I host a radio show called Brooke and Jubal in the morning. What? My name is Jubal and I host a radio show called Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Have you ever heard of it? I don't think so. Wonderful. It means we're doing our job. Yeah. I actually wanted to call you today to ask you about a guy that you recently went on a date with. What? We do a segment on our radio show called The Second Date Update. That's basically where if you go out on a date with somebody and then don't call them back, they email us to see if we can get you on the phone

and ask why. Oh. Okay. That's fun, I guess. It is kind of fun I like it and the guy that emailed us about you his name is Huxley

Huxley? Huxley yeah do you know a lot of Huxleys? I feel like that's not a very common name no I only know one Huxley and have you gone out with Huxley lately? yes I did hang out with him recently okay good we've got the right person on the phone then. Well, Huxley

is wondering why you won't answer any of his Facebook messages or phone calls or anything after you guys hung out. I mean, I don't know. You don't know what? I don't know why I haven't called him back. What? You have to know why you haven't called him back. There's got to be a reason.

I don't know if I should talk about it. Why not? He's the one that's asking. I mean, this is a radio station. Yeah, but he contacted us to get a hold of you because you won't tell him. And so he's confused. Is there anything that you can tell us? I mean, we used to be really good friends in college.

Come on. You've got to give this man something. He has been crushing on you hard for a really long time. He has? Yeah. He says he's had a crush on you since college and you always had a boyfriend so he could never ask you out. And then he saw that you were recently single. So he decided to take the chance and you guys actually went out and now he wants to see you again. But apparently

you're not calling him back. I mean, it's really flattering, but I don't think I'm going to go out with him again. Oh, you should have heard the way he described you and your beautiful smile and how lovely you are and what a good person you are. Super cute. I know. I mean, he is a really nice guy. I mean, Huxley is great. Okay, so if you like him so much and he's a really great guy, why not give him the respect

of at least letting him know why you don't want to go out with him again? Okay, fine. I just don't want to date a guy who's been divorced. Wait, what? You don't want to date a guy who's been divorced? No, it's a huge turnoff to me. Well, Huxley told us that you were recently divorced. Is that not true?

That is true. I just don't want to date a guy who's divorced. Is it because you're just not ready to date yet? No, I just, I don't want to date a guy with all of that baggage from being divorced. That's a lot to deal with. You can see how that sounds a little strange though, right? Like you're divorced and you're saying you don't want to date a guy who's divorced? Yeah, I mean, it's just different.

It's very different. All right. So even though you've been divorced, you just will not date a dude who's been divorced. Yeah, that's right. You understand how hypocritical that sounds, right? I mean, divorce guys are just always bitter and they're always talking about how women are going to take their money just like their ex-wife did that is a huge huge stereotype that i don't think holds true those are the guys that i've met i know a lot of divorce dudes and i've never heard one of them say that actually well you're not dating them are you no unfortunately because a few of them are loaded and i would love to take their money. Hey, Alicia, it's very interesting reasoning.

Thank you for being honest with us and giving us an answer. Yeah, I just prefer a single guy who is completely unattached. That's just my thing. Okay. And my thing is surprising people by letting them know that somebody's on the other line when they're listening. And Huxley is actually on the phone and heard this whole conversation and wants to talk to you. No, he's not. Yep. Yeah, I'm here.

Okay. I don't understand your reasoning at all. It makes no sense. It's just my thing. I don't want to date a divorced guy. But you're divorced. Yeah, but you're a divorced't want to date a divorced guy. But you're divorced. Yeah, but you're a divorced guy, and I'm a divorced woman, and it's very, very different. What?

I don't think it's very, very different at all. The difference is I divorced my husband, but you lost your wife. So it's a very different dynamic. Ouch! What? Oh, my God. Yeah, I won my divorce. You lost yours. You have more baggage because you didn't win your divorce.

Are you kidding me? It's not a board game. So are you saying, Alicia, that because you're the one that divorced your husband, you have less baggage than Huxley? Yeah, when we were at the bar, he told me that his wife broke up with him. I mean, I left my ex, so there's a big difference there. Oh, my God. I did not know that. I didn't either.

My ex and I split like seven years ago. It was like an amicable split. She left, but it was amicable. Both sides agreed that it was over. It sounds like you're changing your story now because that's not what you told me at the bar what are you talking i mean i said she left me which implied like she left the relationship i mean i would have thought differently if you had left her but it sounds like you are not the one in the driver's seat are you just being mean and petty because you're really hurt by your own stuff you're going through?

No, I'm not being mean and petty. I'm telling this guy what I want out of a relationship. How is that being mean and petty? So you'd look me better if I divorced my wife? Yeah. Oh, my God. That is so weird. Actually, I would prefer that you weren't divorced at all.

But since you were divorced, it is better if you left her than the other way around. Wow. I mean, look at it this way. When some people get a dog, some people, like, get a new puppy, and some people like to adopt a rescue. I want a new puppy. Oh, my to adopt a rescue i want a new puppy that's awesome hey alicia would you like to go out on a second date with huxley i probably know the answer but we will pay for a date if you go out with him again you know i i think i made my point pretty clear but I still would like to be friends with him.

What? A little rescue? Alicia, how can I possibly just be friends with you after all of the stuff you just said about me? You're damaged. I just don't want that in a relationship, but I'm fine working with you through it as a friend. I can't do it in a relationship. I'm not damaged. You're damaged.

You're damaged. Like, hear yourself. You're damaged. You're damaged. Like, hear yourself. You are damaged. You are the damaged one. But I'm not as damaged as you because I left my husband. All right. I'll let you guys argue this out later

about who's the more damaged in this situation. Alicia, thank you for your time. Huxley, I'm sorry you didn't get a second date out of this whole thing. Yeah, thanks. But you know what I will do for you, Huxley, I'm sorry you didn't get a second date out of this whole thing. Yeah, thanks. But you know what I will do for you, Huxley? What's that?

I'll ask our listeners. Text in at 78592. We have a beautiful rescue on the phone. His name is Huxley. If you'd like to adopt him, text us, 78592. Broken Jubal in the morning. Text in at 78592 saying, she's right. All divorced guys have baggage.

It's brick and jewel in the morning. If you don't know what I'm talking about, I'm talking about today's second date update. Not really the point. Huxley wanted to call this girl named Alicia. He had a crush on her in high school and everything. They reconnected, finally went out. Well, she didn't want to go out with him again because he's divorced. Shocker, she just got divorced.

And she says she doesn't date divorced guys, even though she's had a divorce. I mean, she treats it like she won the divorce somehow, which I've never been divorced, but I always thought everyone was a loser in this situation. She says because she chose to have the divorce, it's okay. She doesn't have baggage. It was on her turn. But his wife left him. That means he has baggage, and she doesn't want to date him because he's been divorced,

and he didn't win his divorce like she did. Are you kidding me? He's like, dude, it was seven years ago, and I was only married for a year. I swear I'm fine. And everything else was great. Like, that's the only thing? I'm like, no way. Pretty much everybody texting in at 78592 is saying that he dodged a bullet with that one.

Yeah, I think so, too. I mean, come on. But they agreed not to go out because, of course, he's got baggage. Yeah, but she can be his friend. She can be his friend and help him through his baggage. Remember, she sounds like a good person to get advice from. If you want to do a second date update, all you have to do is email the show and we will call the person who didn't call you back. Moving 92.5.

We're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too.

Be more you this year and find them on Bumble. Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money Podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline Podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025. I'll be joined by David Roth of Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr. With guest appearances from Behind the Bastards

Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis and a few surprise guests throughout the show Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcasts or wherever else you get your podcasts from