Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: Farm House Love

Episode Date: October 24, 2016

They're muddy... they're smelly... there's not very good cell phone service. Farms aren't always the IDEAL place for a first date for many people. But two people went on a date to one. And what happened over by the goat's pen, was a LIFE CHANGING moment for one of the love birds. Find out what happened in the Second Date Update.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes,

we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow the Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Listen to mini questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Moving 92.5. Rook and Jubal's Second Date Update.

Now gather round, boys and girls. It's time for your second date update. And today we have quite a doozy of a story. Young couple went out and had a date on the farm. Now, unfortunately, she's not getting a call back. Where did her beau skedaddle to? Well, you'll find out right now in a brand new second date update. Man, those skedaddling bows, I hate that.

Marissa is on the phone to do a second date update today and that's what her email said. She said she had her first date on a farm. I'm interested to find out how that went. Marissa, what's up? How are you? I'm doing good. How are you guys? I'm good. Or should I say howdy?

Uh, yeehaw. Oh, I like that. Whatever you need me to do to make you feel comfortable. Thank you for doing the second date update today. So what's the name of the guy that you want to call? Keith is his name. How did you end up going to a farm? Your email wasn't really clear on that. It just said that you guys spent your date at a farm. Right. So backstory, I actually work on a farm. Oh, cool. What do you do? I'm a farmhand. Just whatever we need to do, planting, weeding, you know, working with the goats, feeding them, all that. Yeah. So that's what a farmhand does. Yeah. I had no idea. Interesting. Learn something new. Yeah, we were more or less a jack of all trades. Okay, cool.

I mean, I assume you took him to the farm that you work on. Yes. How did you meet him? So I was visiting the city. I was visiting one of my really good friends from school. We just got together and were hanging out at a bar, and she had a bunch of friends coming down, and he was one of those friends. All right, so this guy came along in the group of friends that you were hanging out with. How did you eventually decide to go on a date? So when he initially walked in and met him i thought he was cute um so we started talking and we talked a lot throughout the night and one of the topics that

came up was what i do which is working on a farm he was really surprised when i first told him that and he just kept coming back to it throughout the night, like asking me questions about what I do and how I got into it and just all these different things. Well, I could see that. It's a pretty interesting job. I've never met a farmhand. Really? Mm-mm, never.

Wow. You guys sure are city flickers. That's what I said. Like I said, I've only lived in cities my whole life. I've never been out on farms or anything. Do you think he was using it as a way to get to know you, or do you think that he was more interested in the farm than you? I thought

he was very interested in me, because we had other conversations about other stuff. I don't know, maybe he was competitive, because I said to him, come out and see if you can handle it. So I did kind of goad him a little bit, but he seemed excited. So he came out, and we

spent the whole day building a goat pen. That's awesome. A goat pen. I think that's a really cool way to like, one, get to know somebody and really know their personality. How did it go? You know, he was a trooper. He definitely struggled a little bit. Like, I think it was tiring for him.

But is he was he a dude with know-how Or did you have to instruct him the whole time? No, no, he definitely needed the instruction, but he picked stuff up quickly, but you're just not used to using muscles like that. You get tired. If it would have been me, I'd have been like, you want me to nail what into what?

No! It's so dirty in here. Did you see the shoes I wore for this date? Can we just go inside and watch some Netflix or something? Yeah, no. He did show up in Converse, but that was all right. So, I mean, you think he had a positive experience and he wasn't, like, emasculated by having to listen to a lady tell him what to do on a farm, right? No, he was totally cool with that.

There was one slightly embarrassing moment that happened. After we were finished and we got all the goats in there, we were putting down hay for them and he was bending over, and one of the goats jumped on, like, kind of mounted him and started humping him. So he got humped by a goat in the goat pen. I was going to ask if he got any action on this date, but I guess you just answered my question. Well, he did.

Actually, what was even funnier was that he didn't quite get it. He thought the goat just really liked him. He's like, oh, look, you don't really like me. And then I kind of had to pull the goat off of him. He really liked you. He didn't realize what was really going on at that point. The goat liked you a little too much. Get the goat off of your back.

So how did everything end with him? It was an awesome night. So we, you know, had a bonfire outside, drank whiskey, you know, hung out. He was a gentleman. He wanted to stay the night, but he slept on the couch in the living room. Wow. It's easier to sneak out and get back in the living room. Uh-huh. Wow. It's easier to sneak out and get back to that goat pen.

That's why. Oh, God, I didn't even think of that. Yeah, no wonder he's not calling you back. Was he... Oh, wow. Did you guys hang out in the morning, too? So, here's the thing. He was actually gone in the morning when I got up, but there was a note on my fridge that said,

thanks for everything. I had a blast. Like, if he left a note, that's still a good sign, right? That's what I thought. So I texted him a handful of times, gave him a call, has not heard back. It sounds like such a fun day, too. And like a romantic end to the whole thing. Did you guys ever kiss when you were around the bonfire?

Yeah, we did. We made out a little bit. It was really nice. I love this date. I was like, what romantic end? He got humped by a goat and fell asleep on a couch. Doesn't sound that romantic. Okay, the kiss, I guess, could be considered.

All right, well, we'll play a song, come back, call him, and get your second date update, okay? Okay. All right, hold on. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the Morning's Second Date Update. All right, Hold on. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Second date update. All right. Welcome back.

You're so dumb. To today's second date update. It's so dumb and I actually love it. If you missed the first part of today's second date update, Marissa is on the phone and she works at a farm. And that's why there was a little goat sound to start off the second part of today's Second Date Update and she met a guy named Keith actually in the city

when she was out with some friends and he was very impressed that she worked at a farm so she invited him out the next weekend to come check things out on the farm. They spent the whole day together they built a goat pen and thank you and then they had like a bonfire and whatever at night.

And he slept on the couch. She woke up the next morning to find a note on the refrigerator that said, I had a great time. And now she's heard nothing from him. So we're about to call him and find out what the reason is. Marissa, are you ready? Yes. All right. Well, here we go.

I'll dial this one right now, okay? Okay. Okay, here we go. I'll dial this one right now, okay? Okay. Okay, here we go. Hello? Hello? Okay, I think you may have the wrong number. No, Keith. Hey, is this Keith? What? Yes Keith, how are you? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning

What? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning It's a radio show A radio show? Yeah, that wasn't a goat who called you That was me making a goat sound I bet he was I wanted to ask you a few questions about a mutual friend that we have.

A mutual friend? Yeah. I don't think I have any friends in radio. No, she's not in radio. Her name is Marissa, and you sort of went on a date with her. You want to? What now? I wanted to see if you could tell us a little bit about your date with Marissa

because she emailed us and says that since you guys spent an afternoon hanging out at her farm, she hasn't heard from you, and she really thought you guys had a good connection and wanted to go out again. She said all that, did she? Yeah, she did. It's a lot of groaning. It's a segment we do on our show called The Second Date Update. If you go out on a date with somebody and they don't call you back, they email us so that we can call you and find out why.

A second date? There has not been a second date. No, I know. I know. That's what the segment is called. She's basically asking why there won't be a second date. Oh. Did she do something wrong?

I don't know. It was okay for a while. It was okay at first, as far as dates go. But let's just say it got weird at a certain point. Was it after you were humped by a goat? She told you about that part too, huh? Yeah, she told us all about it. That was one of the highlights, really. I loved it. No, honestly, that wasn't it. That was actually, you know, that was a surprise.

Surprise! But it ended up being, you know, like a funny moment, you know? When she described the date, it sounded so fun. There was a bonfire at the end. You guys made out a little bit. Yeah, I mean... You don't agree, do you? Yeah.

On paper, it sounds great. And honestly, a lot of it was really cool. I was really interested in her whole farm deal and getting to swing a hammer and stuff. Do that kind of old school stuff was super fun. It was great. At a certain point, it got weird. Just all in all, she's real cool. I don't think I'm ready for everything about what she's got going on out there.

So you don't think you're ready for farm life? Like when did it get weird? Yeah. There was a moment that happened that has been really impossible to get out of my mind. You have to share. It's killing me. Oh,

it's not, it's not killing you. What does that mean? Okay. Listen, I'm going to tell you, but tell you but it's i i i'm not crazy about telling the story um basically you know it came out there we started pretty quick building this goat pen which honestly was really fun it was very like little house on the prairie kind of deal we're like you know picking up bench rails and super fun okay uh after a while marissa asked me are you are you getting hungry and i'm like yeah

you know i'm really working up an appetite this is great she's like cool i'll go get some food and uh she walked straight over to the chicken coop and i hear like you know a little commotion in the chicken coop she comes walking out she's got a chicken. She's walking towards the house. I'm just watching her go. When there's a girl, she's walking away. You always watch, for sure. As she's walking away, casual

as anything, she just snaps the neck of the chicken. Oh my god! So you watched her murder a chicken. Yeah. She just snapped its neck. Well, you guys, it's farm life, man. Yeah, but you don't just kill an innocent chicken.

Yeah, you do if you want to eat chicken for lunch. I'm just saying. Absolutely, you do. You pluck it, you cut the head off, and you go to town. Yeah, I mean, maybe that's how it's done, but I never wanted to see it happen, and I never had seen it happen, and I never want to see it again. I'm like you.

I just like to pretend that somehow the chicken shows up cooked on my plate. That's how it's born. I don't ever see it. Like, I know intellectually it was once alive, and now it's a sandwich, but, like, you know, I mean, I see the head of the chicken is pointing the wrong way now. And she didn't even break stride. She just cracked, la la la, walking down the way with this, you know, dead feather thing in her hand.

Wow, that's it? Wait, who's that? It's Marissa. Yeah, Keith. I should have told you, Marissa is actually on the other line listening and wants to talk to you. Well, you did not say she was on the phone right now, dude. I know. Slipped my mind.

I'm sorry about that. I completely forgot. But now maybe you guys can talk it out a little bit. I don't know. Listen, Keith. I knew this was your first time at a farm, but I didn't think that you were naive enough to not know where a chicken comes from you know like the stuff on your plate it gets there it's not like i sing a little song

to it and it goes to sleep and then we have a chicken you know what i mean like that's how it happened yeah listen hey i know that that happens okay but I wasn't, I was not ready to see that, and you gave me no warning. If you'd said anything, if you'd said, hey, I'm going to go over here and rip the head off a chicken right now, you know, I would have at least been able to brace myself or maybe look away.

I probably would have looked away. Oh, come on. You're so dramatic. It wasn't that bad at all. First of all, I was walking away from you. You saw I had a chicken in my hand, and I said, are you hungry for dinner? Like, you can't connect the dots on that one?

Honestly, I thought you were going to get some eggs. I wanted an omelet. He's like, makes sense. He's like, she's got a chicken. Clearly, she's planning on making an omelet. He's like, makes sense. He's like, she's got a chicken. Clearly, she's planning on making an omelet. Yeah, it's not like I massage its butt and it gives me eggs. Like, that's not how it works. Dude, am I the only one here that's actually really impressed by Marissa?

If anything, Keith, I think you should be turned on. I mean, a woman who can take a chicken from life to death, pluck it, and serve it to you for dinner is impressive. Thank you. I mean, if we were like, you know, caveman times, I got a debit card. That's how I go and hunt

things, you know? I don't have to put on rubber overalls before I do it. Rubber overalls sound amazing. I need to know where to pick those up. It's just crazy. You go and you eat chicken all the time, right? Why is this an issue?

I used to. Oh, right. So now you're a vegetarian because of this whole thing? No, but... This is not like something in my head or I'm thinking about it and like, oh, my principles. It's like it freaked me out. It freaked me out. I don't know if you noticed.

I don't know if you noticed, but I did not eat any chicken that night. I could barely look at it because I saw what happened to it. And, you know, that night I was sleeping on the couch and I started to drift off. And then I would just see you just snapping that thing's neck. Oh, no. Oh, my God. You hear that, Marissa? It was a horror film.

Keith didn't call you back because he thinks you're a monster. Oh, my God. Honestly, I thought it was going to take – it has taken me longer than I thought to start to get over it. I have not touched chicken since. I can't. I don't even like to smell it. Well, I can tell you it looks a lot worse if you're eating a pig or a cow. And here's the thing.

I mean, the way Marissa did it, she probably had a name for the chicken. It lived a good life. You should be grateful for it. Well, that makes it way worse. It's terrible. It makes it like it's a pet, like a puppy or something. Oh, no. For your information, her name is Sophia.

Oh, no. There you go, Keith. God, great. Now I'm going to be having nightmares of Sophia's neck getting snapped. Thank you. Oh, no. Well, Keith, I have to ask the question. I think I know the answer.

But would you like to go on a second date with Marissa? We will pay for it. I got to say no. What is it? Marissa, you are better off. You don't want a sissy city boy anyway. No complaint here. Oh, man.

All right. Well, Marissa, there you go. The issue was, like, he could have at least said something. Keith, you never even said anything about it being an issue. Keith, you could have handled it exactly how I would have handled it if I saw that. If I saw her snap that chicken's neck, I would have screamed and ran. I would have done it.

Broken Jubal in the morning. Text in at 78592 that says, OMG, city boys are so weak. You know, I take offense to that. The other day, I was getting a manicure and they went a little too deep doing my cuticles and that hurt. And you know what? I only cried a manicure And they went a little too deep doing my cuticles And that hurt and you know what

I only cried a little Aw how manly And a lot of people are texting in at 78592 Saying they'd love to date Marissa From today's second date update If you missed it Marissa met a dude named Keith She works as a farm hand He's like a dude didn't know much about farms

So they went on a first date to her farm And the reason that he wasn't calling her back He's scared of her because he saw her murder a chicken. That's what she was making for dinner. And he saw her kill a chicken and it was just way too much for him. Dude, I can barely bring a box of dinner to

fruition on my stove, let alone kill a chicken and serve it to you. So, just saying, there's not much more woman than that. Most dudes are texting it at 78592 saying they'd love to date her and watch her kill chickens. I don't know. I'm undecided. I've never seen a chicken die in front of me.

You haven't? I don't know. No, uh-uh. I don't know how I feel about it. I'd be scared to see it and then find out that's my thing. So anyway, if you want to do a second date update, all you have to do is email the show and we will call the person who didn't call you back. Moving 92.5.

Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content

you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts,

to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen.

What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast,

and now, Minnie Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Listen to Minnie Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers.