Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: Flat Tire Guy
Episode Date: September 14, 2017It's never good to have a DATE talking trash behind your back.... It's even WORSE if random people are ALSO gossiping about you, the instant you leave the room.... Well, one of our listeners recently ...took a girl out to dinner after he helped her change a tire, and we STILL can't believe the thing he did, that had the entire restaurant whispering about him.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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John Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast.
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People, my people,
what's up? This is Questlove. Man,
I cannot believe we're already
wrapping up another season
of Questlove Supreme.
Man, we've got some amazing guests
lined up to close out the season, but
you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss
all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations
we've had so far.
I mean, we talked to A. Marie,
Johnny Marr,
Eve,
Jonathan Schechter,
Billy Porter,
and so many more.
Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet,
hey, now's your chance.
You gotta check them out.
Listen to Questlove Supreme
on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
I have a surefire way to meet women.
And I'm assuming that the guy on the phone for a second date update today
did the same thing that I've done many times
and it always works.
You see a hot girl going to a store
or something like that.
You see her in the parking lot.
You just walk up to her car,
pop the tire,
and then you hang out in the parking lot
until she comes out.
You're like, oh, you need help with that tire?
Let me help change that for you.
It works every time.
You're one step away from a serial killer.
That's like vandalism, isn't it? I've done it a lot.
Sometimes I just go and I just
pop tires in parking lots just in case
on my way into a store.
And that's what I'm guessing Dallas did
today. He's on the phone to do a second date update
and that's how he met the girl that he wants
to call today. Well, now, I didn't pop the
tire. Just so happens I did change her tire. Thank God, Dallas. For future reference, if you want to meet a girl that's how he met the girl that he wants to call today. Well, now, I didn't pop the tire. It just so happens I did change her tire.
Thank God, Dallas.
For future reference, if you want to meet a girl, that's the best way to do it.
Pop her tires, and then you'll have no choice but to help her.
So your email said that you met the girl you want to call today
because she needed a tire changed, and you came to her rescue.
Yeah, I did.
What's her name?
Brittany.
Brittany, okay, and was she changing the tire,
and you just walked up behind her and were like,
hey, little lady, you don't know how to do that.
Let a big man help you out.
No, it didn't really happen that way.
A few weeks ago, you know, I was at the mall and doing some shopping,
and as I was leaving, Brittany flagged me down,
and she was kind of like in a panic,
and she asked me if I knew how to change a flat tire.
So, you know, obviously I did, luckily.
And she asked if I could help.
And I said, of course.
So I went to her car and started to jack the car up and change the tire.
And I had noticed she had this, like, really cute southern accent.
And so I kind of went out of my way.
And I was like, are you from around here?
And she was like, well, no, sir, I'm not.
I'm just a poor southern girl who needed a tire changed.
Why don't we go out for some sweet tea and maybe some cheese grits?
Sounds like the start of a porn or something.
You like cheese grits? You know, anywhere in town a lady can get some nice cheese grits.
What is wrong with you?
Did you hit on her or, you know, how did you proceed after that?
Well, she kind of went on to tell me that she was new to the area and that she didn't really know anyone.
And when I was done changing the tire, you know, she was really, really thankful and she shook my hand. And as I was getting ready
to grab my stuff and leave, I kind of just stopped and turned around and I kind of just said,
hey, do you want to go out? Do you want to go get some food or something? And she said, sure.
Like at a later date or you guys went that day?
Oh, we went right then and there.
Oh, you did? We went and got food really, really close to the mall.
And this is where things kind of took a turn.
You know, we went to eat, we ordered our food,
and we were both about halfway done eating.
And I noticed that she kind of stopped, you know,
being so responsive to conversations.
She was a lot less talkative.
She started to become a little, like, timid and shy, I guess.
I do declare that I believe you have overstepped your bounds, sir.
I will take off my long white glove and slap you in the face.
Did you say anything to make it seem like you offended her?
No, not at all.
It just, it kind of just all of a sudden it was like, she just stopped
talking. So I said, you know, is anything wrong? And she said, well, she didn't really like the
food at the place we were eating at. So I said, well, okay, we do want to leave. You know, I felt
really bad. And she was like, no, no, that's okay. It's, it's fine. So when the waiter came back,
I asked him if, you know, we could get the check and, and if he could box up our food and we could
go. And, you know, as we started to leave, I asked her, I said, hey, you know, could we maybe do this again, you know, at a different place, you know, that you would like?
And she said, of course.
So we exchanged numbers and we left.
At the end of the date, did you guys kiss or anything like that?
Or was it just exchange numbers?
No, it was just an exchange number.
And then, you know, we went on our way.
But, you know, I listen to you guys all the time, and I really trust you guys.
And what's going on in my mind right now is I feel like she felt obligated to kind of go out with me because I did something nice.
Oh, yeah.
And not because I'm attractive or anything like that.
That makes sense.
See, I was thinking the opposite, that she flagged you down because you were hot.
I mean, because there's other people that come out of the mall.
I'm sure that there was other people around
she could have flagged down, right?
Of course, yes.
I don't think she was obligated at all.
I think she set it up.
Well, maybe she felt like she was obligated.
Well, if she set it up,
she definitely didn't like something about him
because she's not calling him back.
Well, maybe his personality failed.
I don't know what happened.
So you think maybe she felt obligated and that's the reason that she's not calling him back. Well, maybe his personality failed. I don't know what happened. So you think maybe she felt obligated
and that's the reason that she's not calling you back?
Exactly.
Which is weird because she just moved to town,
so she doesn't have very many other friends.
Whenever I'm new to a town, I say yes to anybody,
no matter who you are.
Like, yeah, I'll hang out with you.
I don't know.
I'm new to town.
Yes, gentlemen, jump on it.
I say yes to anybody whenever I move to a town. That's good to town. Yes, gentlemen, jump on it.
I say yes to anybody whenever I move to a town.
That's good to know.
To go out and show me around.
Yeah, we know what you meant.
We all know what you meant.
All right, Dallas.
Well, we'll play a song.
We'll come back.
We'll get your southern lady on the phone and find out why she's not ringing you back, okay?
All right, guys.
All right.
Until then,
you enjoy some
sweet potato pie.
We'll do it right after this.
Moving 92.5.
Brooke and Jubal
in the morning.
Second date update.
Dallas is on the phone
with us to do
a second date update today.
Not the city.
That's good. I wish the whole city. Dallas is on the phone with us to do a second date update today. Not the city. That's good.
I wish the whole city.
The guy named Dallas
is on the phone with us
to do a second date update today.
He wants us to call a girl named Brittany.
I'm going to actually recap his date
by telling her side of the story.
I think this is what she would say
when we talk to her.
So there I was.
Had a flat tire on my car
and I did not know how to fix it.
I was just staring at this tire as confused as a fart in a fan factory.
And then all of a sudden, out of the store, I see this big strapping young gentleman named Dallas.
And I was hollering like a stuck pig, asking him to come help me out.
So I walked up to him.
I said, kind sir, do you think you can help change a southern lady's tire? And as he was changing it, I was just sitting there
grinning like a possum eating a sweet tater, looking at how he changed my tire and helped
me out. And then, could you believe the nerve of this man, he asked me to go to food with
him right after. And the only reason I did was because I felt obligated to, because normally
a southern lady would make a gentleman court her properly.
So we had a meal, and then once we were done with our meal,
we went our separate ways, and I would never talk to him again
because he was way too forward.
I'd have smacked him in his stupid face.
Hey, Dallas, is that about right?
I think I should take you out on a date.
I was going to say, after that, we don't even need to make the phone call.
I mean, that kind of settles it, doesn't it?
Dallas met this girl, Brittany, in the parking lot.
She had a flat tire.
He was walking out.
She said, can you change it?
He changed it, and then they went to go eat.
The meal went well, and then about halfway through,
she kind of seemed cold and awkward.
And they exchanged numbers and said they might go out again,
but she hasn't been very receptive.
We're about to call her right now.
Okay.
Here we go.
Hello?
Hi, can I speak to Brittany, please?
This is she.
Hello, Brittany. How are you?
I'm good.
Who is this?
Oh, this is Jubal from Brooke and Jubal in the Morning.
Um, I don't know you. No, you don't. This is Jubal from Brooke and Jubal in the Morning,
the radio show. Okay, I still don't know you. It's a morning radio show, and I'm calling you today because one of our listeners actually sent us an email about you.
About me?
Yes.
Okay.
It's a segment that we do on our show called The Second Date Update.
You recently went out with a guy named Dallas.
Oh.
Okay.
You remember meeting Dallas?
He said that he helped you change a tire on your car and then you guys went out for a meal after?
Yeah, I remember him.
What'd you think of Dallas?
Um, I mean, he was a nice guy and everything.
You just didn't click with him?
Um, well, not really.
I mean, it just kind of got weird so it got weird can you tell us how
well at dinner like it was a really nice dinner we're sitting down and he gets up to leave like
three times to go to the bathroom which is not typically a weird thing but the second time he
come back like super sweaty he came back to the table super sweaty?
Yes, he was super sweaty.
And I didn't know what to think, and I thought, well, poor guy,
maybe he's sick or something.
So I asked him, you know, are you okay?
Do you need to leave?
And he said, no, no, I'm great.
I'm good.
I've never seen somebody come back from the bathroom sweating like that before.
Maybe he's got IBS.
Maybe. I don't know.
I mean, it wasn't spicy food, but it got worse.
Like, we're sitting there, and he goes again,
and then there's a table right beside of us,
and that guy leaves to go to the bathroom, I guess,
comes back, and I can hear the conversation.
Don't tell me they both came back sweaty together.
I wouldn't want to call him back either.
Mystery solved, though.
Oh, no.
The guy was actually talking about my date.
I could hear them talking about him and saying,
there's some guy in the bathroom doing really weird stuff.
What was he doing?
I don't know.
They didn't say.
They just said that they knew it was weird and it made him uncomfortable.
It just makes the guy uncomfortable in the bathroom.
Something's wrong.
Yeah.
Listen, there's a lot of weird stuff that goes on in guys' bathrooms.
I've never left them going like, whoa, there's some guy in there doing something strange.
I've got to get out of here.
Right.
So I just had to leave.
Like, you don't know what to expect when you're in a new town and new people.
Yeah.
And you never asked him what he was doing in the bathroom.
I didn't want to.
I mean, what if he told me and asked me to join him? he was doing in the bathroom. I didn't want to I mean
So did you make up a lie about the food not tasting good to get out of there
Okay, you did You actually went back to that restaurant the next day. It was so good. You actually went back there. Oh, no. You actually went
back to that restaurant the next day.
I did. It was so good.
Alright, so that's the reason you're not
calling him back because he was doing something
weird in the bathroom making him sweat.
Yes, that's
exactly why. That's interesting.
You know what else is interesting? He's actually on
the phone listening right now.
Are you serious?
Yes, I am.
100% serious.
Dallas, what were you doing in the bathroom?
Yeah.
Get your guys' minds out of the gutter, okay?
I was not doing what you guys think I was doing.
I have no idea what you're doing.
I had an idea.
I will admit, okay, this is, I will admit,
I did get up a few extra times from the table to go to the bathroom.
And I'm really embarrassed to say this, but I was in the bathroom doing push-ups.
What?
No.
You were doing push-ups?
Why were you doing push-ups?
I'm just into fitness and stuff and I felt like, because
I hadn't been to the gym in a couple days, I felt
like I didn't look good enough for you.
And so I went
in there to get kind of like a little bit of a workout
and to kind of look a little bit more
muscular. So you went into the
bathroom to do push-ups to get a pump?
You know, this
was not even scheduled or anything.
I didn't have time to go to the gym before this date.
I didn't even know this date was going to happen.
And I met her, and she is awesome.
And that's what I did.
You just left the table randomly to go work out in the bathroom?
Yeah, I did.
On the bathroom floor?
I washed my hands before I came back to the table.
That is disgusting. It doesn't make it better. Bernie, do you believe floor. I washed my hands before I came back to the table. That is disgusting.
Doesn't make it better.
Brittany, do you believe him?
I don't know that I, I mean, I know you explained it, but I don't know that I buy your story.
This is the God honest truth.
Seriously.
Is this what guys do here?
Like you go out into the bathroom to work out during the day?
Is this how it works?
No.
I never have.
I've never, I've never done that one time,
but I felt like I didn't look good enough for you,
and that's why I did it.
It was more of a freak-out thing.
So working on the car and the tire change
wasn't an actual workout?
You needed a more intensive workout in the bathroom?
To a sense, yeah,
because changing the tire is nothing.
I'm so fit.
Changing a tire doesn't do anything.
I gotta go
do some push-ups and some burpees in the
bathroom. I don't know. I don't know
if I actually buy this whole story.
That sounds weird. I need to know,
were his muscles impressive?
I mean, yeah, he's a really impressive guy.
I actually noticed that when he was changing the
tire. You could tell he works out. I just noticed that when he was changing the tire. And, I mean, you can tell he works out.
I just never expected it to be during the date in the bathroom.
Hey, Brittany, I would like to ask you this.
Would you like to go on a second date with Dallas?
We will pay for it.
Hey, guys, can I do this myself?
Sure.
Go for it.
I mean, hey, dude, I don't want to get beat up by you.
You know, I know you do.
Look, Brittany, I'm telling you the truth.
I did push-ups in the bathroom to try and impress you.
So if you give me a second chance, I promise that I will work out before dinner and not during.
That's a pretty good promise.
And also we'll pay for the date Brittany
You know you were a really great guy
stopping to take care of my tire and take care of me
and you went this far to actually get a second date
so you know I think yeah let's try it again
Awesome congratulations Dallas you got your second date
Well thank you guys I appreciate the help
No problem.
Stop doing push-ups in the bathroom.
I will stop doing push-ups in the bathroom.
I'm just embarrassed because I never thought that she would ever find out.
Broken Jubal in the morning.
John Stewart is back at The Daily Show,
and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears
with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast.
Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics,
entertainment, sports, and more.
Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors.
And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups,
this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else.
Ready to laugh and stay informed?
Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers.
So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts,
to give you the context you need to make sense of it all.
Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters.
You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine.
A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC.
Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen.
People, my people, what's up?
This is Questlove.
Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up
another season of Questlove Supreme.
Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up
to close out the season, but, you know,
I don't want any of you guys to miss all the
incredible conversations we've had so far
I mean we talked to A. Marie
Johnny Marr, E.
Jonathan Schechter
Billy Porter and so many more
look if you haven't heard these episodes yet
hey now's your chance
you gotta check them out
listen to Questlove Supreme on the
iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.