Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: It’s a Conspiracy

Episode Date: January 27, 2014

45 minutes late to your first date is a bad way to make a first impression... but it's all about how you recover. And today's Second Dater, Todd, apparently failed at that too. Now he's emailed us as a last resort. Hear WHY in the Second Date Update! (Image Courtesy: ZakVTA. Creative Commons)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

John Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast. And now,

Minnie Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Listen to Minnie Questions on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. $1.4 billion in NFL quarterback contracts. The untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history. I'm AJ Stevens, Vice President of Client Strategy at Athletes First. Introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast, the quarterback series. My co-host Brian Murphy, Athletes First CEO, and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts

for Justin Herbert, Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm actually really surprised that today's second dater isn't getting a call back from the girl that he went out with. No. Because most women, in my experience, love it when you're late for the first date. I knew this was going to be sarcastic right i don't think isn't isn't that their favorite thing when you show up late that's

what happened to todd he showed up a little late for his first date that's not even the weirdest part todd how are you good why don't you tell us about your date well i know that showing up late was a bad move but understand that like i had already been chatting with kate i met her on a dating website and we had chatted for a long time and before we decided to go out were you like a half hour late or 15 minutes late i was 45 minutes late that hurts but i had a really good idea for a for a date though i was taking her to a winery uh- I thought, you know, I know being late's a bad move, but I think the date itself, I sort of changed her mind during the course of it. Did I first ask if you had a good excuse for being late? Well, I was trying to think of a good excuse

or maybe like stop by and pick up something, but that would have made me later. So no, you didn't. Todd didn't have a good excuse, but according to his email, he had a great way to smooth it over with her. Oh, okay. And that was by giving her a gift, right, Todd? Uh-oh.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I looked in my glove compartment of my car, and I found a laser pointer keychain that I hadn't used. Uh-huh. So I gave her that. Okay. And what was her reaction, Todd? Well, she was like, oh, oh, thank you.

That seems appropriate. That seems very appropriate. And she seemed, like, happy to have been receiving something for free, but not too thrilled at having to wait. But I don't know. Were you just, like, trying to trying to think of, you're just like, oh, crap. I'm sorry I was late. It's because I needed to stop off and get you this gift.

Todd. I had an important PowerPoint presentation, and here you are. Well, I hope that that was implied, that I spent all that time getting a gift for her. Yeah, I don't think it was. Todd, how did the rest of the date go? I mean, was she able to get over it?

I'm glad you mentioned it that way because she was bummed at first. But when we took the tour of the winery and then we started tasting some wine, I felt like we got back on track. Okay. And, like, we started chatting and we just chatted forever, like all night. I even lost track of time and it was time to go. And so then I took her back to her car and leaned in to kiss her, and she kind of, like, turned her cheek. Okay, so did you end up – so she turned away from you. Did you kiss her on the cheek then?

I did kiss her on the cheek, which is fine. I mean, maybe she just doesn't kiss on the first date or something like that. But it seemed like things were going really well up until there. At any point, did you bust out the laser light and make her chase it? Like a cat. Todd, you sound kind of nervous right now. Are you? Well, I'm on the radio, so...

I'm not dissing it. I'm just wondering how smooth that kiss was. I think it was pretty smooth, but I guess you're right. Like, I'm not the most experienced, but it seemed like I have been on some dates before, though. How many times have you tried to get a hold of her since your date? A couple. I tried initially, and I left a message on her voicemail, and I haven't heard back.

And I tried again, and it went to voicemail, but I didn't leave a message. And you haven't heard anything from her, obviously. I haven't heard anything. It's been a week. Yeah. It astounds me why you're not getting a call back. I mean, you were late, and then you gave her a gift, a lovely laser pointer, and then you had an awkward kiss at the end of the night. I don't know what could have gone wrong. All right, we're going to play a song. Come back, call her, and get your second date update, okay?

Okay. All right, hang on. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the Morning's Second Date Update. Hey, Todd? Yeah? I think the problem is you didn't go far enough Oh no

When you were late for your date Don't do this to him If you missed the first part of the second date update Todd was late for his date with a girl named Kate So when he showed up 45 minutes later He gave her a laser pointer Oh gosh As a gift

As a token Todd if you've ever been late for anything What you should have done is just made up a crazy story about something that happened to you on the way and just lied about it. That would have probably been better. Well, the laser pointer was pretty cool. I thought that Jubal was going to go with

you should have given her a laser pointer figuratively, but I'm glad he didn't. Yeah. Todd, what was the last thing you said to Kate that night? It was, I'll call you tomorrow, and I did. And no answer. All right. We're going to try to get her on the phone right now and see if we can get your second date update.

You ready to go, Todd? Oh, man. Yes. Okay, here we go. Hello? Hi, can I speak to Kateate please this is she hey kate how are you this is jubel from brook and jubel in the morning i'm moving 92.5 uh who is this this is jubel from brook and jubel in the morning on the radio station moving in 92.5. How are you? I'm good. How are you? I'm good.

Listen, I'm calling because you recently went out on a date with a friend of mine named Todd. Okay. And Todd said you had a fun time. He showed up a little late, but he gave you a cool little gift to say that he was sorry. He's tried calling you, and you haven't answered any of his attempts is there a reason why you're not calling todd back um yeah is it because he was late i mean that wasn't great but no did you that wasn't did you like Todd to a certain point?

Todd was an interesting person to meet. Okay. How so? What do you mean interesting? Well, I mean, I don't know how much he told you or what you all know. I mean, I guess you know about the laser pointer. Did he play a lot with the laser pointer? Yeah, actually. He kept grabbing it out of my hand

and sort of playing with it, and that was just sort of the beginning of the weird things that happened on the date. What do you mean the weird things that happened on the date? What weird happened? I feel bad telling you this, but we were on this wine tour, which was a cool idea for a date, actually. And he keeps grabbing the laser pointer and pointing at things, and then he leans over and he whispers really close in my ear,

Do you know where laser technology comes from? This sounds sexy talk to talk. It's kind of like one of those dates, but narrated with a fun pop-up back. Yeah. Where do the word... So he was just breaking down lasers to you? Well, I thought that that's where it was going to go. I was like, oh, God, he's a tech geek.

But it was more than that. And then I realized exactly what was going on there. He's like one of those conspiracy theory black job types what do you what do you mean like government conspiracy theory type guy yeah he said that lasers have came from aliens and that the government doesn't want us to know where we're getting the technology. Kate, is there any way he could have been joking when he said this?

No, because then he talked about aliens nonstop for the rest of the date. He said aliens have something to do with why we have redheads. I'm sorry, that was a lie. Why we have redheads. What? I mean, he was talking,

he was embarrassing. We're on a tour and the guide is trying to, like, keep people focused and he's just chatting my ear off without even noticing that it was embarrassing. We're on a tour, and the guide is trying to keep people focused, and he's just chatting my ear off without even noticing that it's weird. Hey, Kate. Yeah?

I do need to let you know that we have the Earthling Todd on the other line with us right now. And he heard what you just said. Hey, Todd. Oh, no. Yeah, I don't even know. I don't understand. What's the big deal? We were just getting to know each other.

It was the first date. I was just. Oh, my God. I just, I don't think it went really great. I mean, did you think it went really great? I think it went pretty well. I don't agree. I mean, have you ever been on a first date with a woman before?

Oh! I don't mean that. I mean, mean. I just, I can't believe you thought that it was a good time. Well, you were laughing. You know, we had some good laughs. It was pretty fun. Well, I thought you were joking at first.

That's why I was laughing. You were like, how are the pyramids built? Aliens. Who shot JFK? Aliens. Who shot JFK? Aliens. What makes Chris Christie's Crackle and Pop aliens? It was insane. It was weird.

That's not weird. No, that's not. I mean, I don't know if you've seen any documentaries on the Great Pyramids, but they're too large for humans with the technology that they had back then to even build them. I agree with you. And now they became extraterrestrial means. Oh, gosh. Well, the thing is, I don't believe in aliens, and even if I did, I wouldn't want to talk

about it for two and a half hours on the first date. Never. You seemed interested at the time, and I just wanted to let you know that this is out there, that people do believe this, and I mean, I don't know why you don't. I guess maybe you just need to watch a few more science documentaries. Todd, look at it this way. Maybe Kate doesn't have much in common with you, and maybe that's the problem. I think that a lot of our technology has its roots in extraterrestrial means.

Dude. The second date update has turned into us breaking down what's alien technology and what's not. A lot of our technology has its roots in extraterrestrial means. The second date update has turned into us breaking down what's alien technology and what's not. Next crop circle. Seriously, add conspiracy theories onto politics and other things you shouldn't talk about on a first date. I don't like the idea of calling it conspiracy because then it makes it sound like there's someone out to get us or something like that, when in fact this is just based in fact. This is scientific fact. I mean, Jubal, you would back me up on some of this? Absolutely.

What are you talking about? I believe in aliens. I believe in everything that you've said, Todd. You and I should go on a date. We'd have an awesome time. I don't understand this. I believe in aliens, and I have the material to back it up. If you go on a second date with me, I'll bring it.

Oh, no. Oh, he has evidence. So you have evidence of aliens, Todd. Dude. Yes. And that the government hasn't taken from you. You guys are all laughing right now, but wait until they come down, and then I'll be the one laughing at you guys.

Hey, I'll be right there with you, Todd. We'll be on the mothership, man. These guys, they just don't get it. You know what I mean? You're going to go live with aliens the rest of your life? Absolutely. Mate with them? Me and Todd. You and Todd and the aliens. Kate, Todd says that he has proof that aliens are out there. If you go on a second date with him, I'm sure that he'll show you. Can I convince you to go on a second date with Todd? We will pay for it.

You know, I don't think the idea of talking about aliens for a second date is going to be motivation for me to go out with Todd. Even with proof of aliens, you could be one of the few people that actually get to see proof that aliens exist. Your name could be in the history books. Yeah.

I think I'm going to have to pass. That's strange. I feel I'm going to have to pass. Yeah. That's strange. Come on, she sucks. I feel bad, Todd. It was nice meeting you. Kate, I thought you were different. I thought you wanted to know.

Broken Jubal in the morning. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else.

Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast. And now, Minnie Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Listen to Minnie Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Seven questions, limitless answers. $1.4 billion in NFL quarterback contracts. The untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history. I'm A.J. Stevens, Vice President of Client Strategy at Athletes First, introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast, the quarterback series. My co-host, Brian Murphy, Athletes First CEO, and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert,

Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.