Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: Moose on the Loose

Episode Date: April 6, 2017

When you're too tired to do a real date, but you still don't' want to cancel completely... you end up with today's Second Date Update. Jake's evening included a romantic homemade dinner, some Netflix... and a moose?? Find out exactly what happened in the podcast.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you by the IHOP Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from.

Today's second date update is crazy. This guy Jake is on the phone, and he actually met the girl that he wants us to call at a wedding. That's not that crazy. That happens a lot. But she was the bride. What? Okay, we don't even want to be involved in this. I'm going to put my foot down right now. I'm just kidding.

Oh, thank God. But he did meet her at a wedding. Oh, my God. What's up, Jake? How are you? Good. How are you? Good. Good.

So your email said that you met the girl that you want to call today at a wedding. I made up the bride part. Tell us a little bit about her. Well, I mean, she's really hot. The first thing that attracts anyone. Right. I did notice that she was packing heat in her booty. There you go.

That's nice. So you were at this wedding and you were like, damn, that is. No, I definitely was. I was eyeing the buffet before, but then I saw that and I'm like, hmm. Wait a second. There's a much bigger honey glazed ham over there I would like to sample. Oh my god, you're good. How did you approach her at the wedding? Did you already know her? Is she a friend?

Or did you just meet her there? She knew the groom and I was friends with the bride. Okay, so you didn't know her prior to the wedding. You met her at the wedding. No, I did not. We met at the wedding, yeah. And were you watching her the whole time to make sure she wasn't there with the date,

or were you just crossing your fingers and hoping for the best? I was just hoping. You know, in retrospect, I probably should have checked. Yeah. Most people go to weddings with dates, so. Right, right. No, I didn't check. I just figured, you know, what the hell?

How often am I going to be able to see someone like that? I might as well approach her while I can. So how did you approach her? Well, this is a really stupid thing about Russian. I went over to her, and I pretended to drop my wallet, and then I picked it up in front of her. And then I was like, oh, sorry, I didn't mean to get in your way. And then I was like, hey, I didn't recognize you.

Are you, do you know the bride of the groom? And she's like, oh, actually, I'm friends with the groom. And I was like, oh, well, I'm, you know. That actually worked. You dropped your wallet in front of her like, oops, sorry about that. Well, in my mind, it worked better than it actually did. But I think that it worked somewhat. Did she see, I mean. Did she see through it?

She knew, obviously, that you were trying to pick up on her, right? I'm pretty sure she did. I'm pretty sure that she was aware. It makes it easier also to ask for the number, like, hey, obviously I'm hitting on you. Can we go out? So you guys did go out, though. Tell us about your date. Originally, we were going to go out to dinner, but I worked really late that night.

And so, you know, I called her like four or five hours before our date and I was like, hey, I have this big project I have to be able to finish. So can we just do the date at my place? I can cook you dinner and, you know, maybe we can watch something. Was that really your excuse or was this just a plan to get her back to your place? No that is that is I can swear. From now on you're gonna use it as an excuse. Yeah I guess that I should. And so she came over to your house and then what'd you guys do? I made her dinner and then we watched a movie and we had a few drinks, made out a little bit. Is that it? Just make out? Or did you guys do more?

Yeah, no, no. That was kind of it. You're letting me down. I thought it was like, man, this started off as a dinner date at a restaurant. Now he's like, just said I have to work late. Now she's back at the house, drinking, watching TV. This is going to end great. So you made out for a little while. And how did everything end with her? I thought at least it went well. And the next day I went to text her just to check up to see how things were and she never really responded. So have you heard anything from her at all?

No, nothing. Was the conversation easy when you guys were together or was it like some awkward stuff? Well, yeah, looking back on it, I think that I probably told one too many stories about being drunk with my buddies. I'm going to go with yes. I've been in that position before because I have a lot of drunk stories. It's pretty much the only stories I have.

And so if I'm out on a date, I realize, like, oh, man, like every single story that I've said has been about me being hammered. And they're impressive to your bros. They're not impressive to the lady. No, not at all. You know?

See, I had the same problem that Jubal had because I was like, I was like, yeah, this is a really great story. I got to say, oh, I'm drunk on that story. I'm drunk on that story, too. All right. So you think maybe that she just thinks you're like a party dude or something? That's what I'm afraid of. Yeah.

And that's why I wanted to call you guys because, you know, I can legitimately have a normal date where we go to dinner and I don't talk about how I got drunk with my buddies all the time. All right. I feel like, and the ladies can correct me if I'm wrong on this, but I feel like if you do that,

if you talk about being drunk all the time, maybe a girl will look at you like, oh, you're not the type of dude. Yeah, yeah. And that's the thing, I'm afraid, you know, because it was a first meeting

that she may just have the wrong idea and I would love the chance to make it up explain it to her that you're not always drunk all right well we'll play a song come back call her and get your second date update all right thank you okay hang on moving 92.5 brook and jubile in the morning second date update all right jake is on the phone and today he wants to call a girl named Eliza.

They met at a wedding, ended up having a date back at his house. He made her dinner. They watched some TV, made out a little bit. But then she left, and he hasn't heard a thing from her. The only thing that he thinks went wrong on the date is maybe he told one too many drunk stories, and maybe it turned her off. Because girls love it when you're on a first date, and you're just like, yeah, me and my buddy, Chet, we're just were just like crushing beers oh i got another story for you it's about

when me and my buddy chet were crushing beers like so he feels like he kind of did that number and now she's like i don't know if i want to date this dude he seems just like a kind of a douchebag would that be an appropriate breakdown of your date jake unfortunately yeah all right well i'm about to dial the phone number. Any last thoughts before we get her on the phone? I really do think that I can make it better. I really do think I can. Okay, cool. I'm going to dial the phone number and see if we can get her on the phone. Okay? Okay.

Alright, here we go. Hello? Hi, can I speak to Eliza, please? This is she. Hi, Eliza. How are you? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning, the radio show. Do you have the wrong number?

I don't think so. Is your number 6-3-8-5? Yeah, that's my phone number. Okay, then you're the Eliza that I want to talk to. How are you doing today? Okay, I'm fine, I guess. Well, I'm calling you because a listener of ours recently sent us an email asking us to get a hold of you. Okay, why?

Because you guys recently went out on a date, and now you're not calling him back. Okay. Why? Because you guys recently went out on a date, and now you're not calling him back. Okay. His name is Jake. You met him at a wedding and then ended up having dinner at his house. How do you guys know that? He sent you an email? Yeah, he did. He told us a little bit about your date and also said that you're not calling him back. What did you think of jake he seemed nice enough nice enough yeah from meeting him he seems like a good

guy okay everything you're saying sounds like you don't think that about him anymore, though. Well, you know, I mean, I'm not calling him back, so. Good point. Very good point. Do you mind telling us why you don't want to see him again? He's curious. Well, he kind of canceled our dinner date and invited me to go back to his place, which it was, I mean, I was a little skeptical about if he was just trying to get me, you know, to go back to his place to have dinner there and whatever.

But he told us about that. And I thought the same thing. Cause I even asked him when we talked to him and I was like, that was a great excuse to get you back to his house. But he was a hundred percent legit. He was working late. Yeah. It sounds like a lie.

But did you enjoy dinner and everything with him when you went over to his house? I did. And we had a good time at first. And then after a few drinks, we just kind of started talking. And he started just telling me stories about all of his late nights with his buddies and how they get wasted every weekend and all all these crazy stories and i don't know i was just kind of a little taken back by that okay was it just too many drunk stories well yeah and i mean he started saying that his nickname was the moose the moose and um why is his nickname the moose did he explain that?

Well, he told me that his buddies call him that once they all start, and once especially he starts drinking. Why? Did he give you an explanation? He gave me a demonstration. What? I've got to hear this. A demonstration of why they call him The Moose.

Does it involve showing you a body part because that's where my mind No No, no, he actually just grabbed the bottle of wine from the table and started chugging wine straight from the bottle So was he just getting hammered on your date then I Don't know exactly. He was drinking a lot. Okay. Well, that's what the moose does.

Did he want you to start chanting moose, moose, moose during it? He did not ask me to do that, but I have a feeling that that's probably what usually happens. Like if you would have started, he would have been like, yeah, this chick's down. She knows how moose parties. Oh, my gosh. What did you say when your date started chugging wine in front of you? I mean, what do you say? I was just like, oh, wow, that's really cool.

Yeah, I guess, yeah. Are you going to be super impressed by that? Like, my patent move is chugging a whole bottle of wine in front of a girl. Trust me, it works every time. I didn't know what to say. Yeah. that like my patent move is chugging a whole bottle of wine in front of a girl trust me it works every time i didn't know what to say yeah so and then at one point we were kind of watching tv and he was still drinking and he was like well you know maybe if we keep drinking the little moose can come out and play no he did. He actually referred to it as the Little Moose. Yes, he did.

All right. Hey, Eliza, when we talked to him, because we talked to everybody about their date, he left out the Moose part. Have you been wanting to talk to the Moose since? You know, I think I'm okay. Okay, well, unfortunately, Eliza, the Moose is actually on the other line and just heard what you said. Moose, you there? Yeah, I am. You left out a very important part of your story there, Jake. No, we talked about all kinds of party stories.

I didn't leave anything out. Yeah, but you didn't tell us that you referred to yourself as moose and then asked her to touch the little moose. Well, to be fair, I don't remember that. So that's a good sign. There you go. You don't remember that? Are you serious? No.

Listen, I feel really bad. I felt like I already ruined the date because I had to move into my place, and I wanted to impress you, so I wanted to sound adventurous. I'm like, well, what adventure stories have I done? And they all ended up involving me drinking. There's a difference between being adventurous and acting like a frat boy. Beer bonging wine in front of your date. I'm sorry, I'm a fun guy when I party.

I want you to experience the moose. Ride the antlers. That's what I do sorry. I'm a fun guy when I party, you know. I wanted you to experience the moose, you know, ride the antlers. That's what I do sometimes. Jake, getting drunk on a first date and calling yourself the moose is just, it's not cool. And I'm looking for somebody who's more mature than that. Yeah, I know. I know. And you know what? I made a mistake, and I feel bad.

Once again, I was nervous. I wasn't making the best decisions. I was nervous because I liked you. And Eliza, you couldn't have hated it that much. I mean, you did make out with him. Yeah. Yeah, and I kind of regret that. You regret that?

You regret making out with me? Uh-oh. The moose is loose, it sounds like. Jake is upset. That's really insulting. Well, Jake, from what she told us, you didn't really exactly sell yourself very well. When did you guys make out? Did you guys make out before you started calling yourself the moose or after, Eliza?

It was before. It was before, okay. So she was down with making out with you until you started calling yourself the moose, and then she regrets it I don't necessarily think is that rude Jake? It's just I can't believe she said that though Jake How about this you got like 10 15 seconds sell yourself to Eliza right now and make her think that you're not just a drunken D-bag

Eliza I Apologize I I really do like you and I was nervous I promise if I see you again that you'll really get to know the real me. Eliza, would you like to go out on a second date with Jake? I will pay for it. You know, Moose, I just don't think that's going to happen. But I feel like hopefully you'll learn something, and maybe you won't do this to the next girl you try to have a first date with.

One more date with the Moose, and he'll prove to you. Maybe the Moose won't even be there. It'll just be Jake. Nah, I think I'm good. Really? Well, thank you for your time, Eliza. I appreciate it. You're welcome. Alright, Jake, I'm sorry, man.

No second date for you. I unfortunately understand. Maybe if you would have been the moose the whole time, you would have been able to seal the deal. I think that's the problem. Jake is boring. You know what? This moose is going to find a female me.

We need more moose in our lives. Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Text in at 78592. It just says, bruh, you made the moose angry. Yeah, yeah. I did. Don't insult the moose. I don't know what I'm talking about.

I'm talking about the second date update that was obviously taped while Brooke was still here. She's out on maternity leave. Jackie is filling in. But Jake wanted to call a girl named Eliza. They hung out, watched Netflix, stuff like that. Drank a little bit. That's kind of what he said. Drank a little bit. He drank a lot.

Turns out Jake is kind of a frat boy. Yeah, he's a bro bro. Yeah, he's a super bro. And he calls himself the moose. Right there just speaks volumes. If any dude calls himself the anything, you're a bro. Pretty much know they're a D-bag right away. So he got hammered while they were hanging out and kept calling himself the moose and talking about all the crazy things that the moose does when he drinks.

I picture posters hanging in his apartment too. Yeah. Like Bud Light girls. Yeah, exactly. Even made an offer for the little moose to come out and play. So Eliza was not down with that. She thought that he was kind of douchey and didn't want to go out with him again. Yeah.

And I like how guys like him, they don't get it. Even after, he's like, what? What do you mean? No one's turned down the moose. Yeah. Did you not hear how I describe myself? I describe myself as a very powerful animal. And also not one that you would normally think of as being a powerful animal.

A moose, which also are kind of funny animals. Therefore, I'm powerful and I have a good sense of humor. I have everything that a chick wants. That's pretty much what Moose thinks of himself. But he's single. That's weird. Surprising. Yeah.

But he says there is a female Moose out there who will want to date the Moose. Oh, I'm sure. He'll find his equivalent. He will. And you'll see them at the bar when it's closing down fighting in a parking lot somewhere. Absolutely. Both of them crying and angry. He's like, you just lost

out. This Moose relationship is over. Remember, if you want to do a second date update, all you have to do is email the show, and we will call the moose who didn't call you back. Move at 92.5. Ugh. We're so done with

New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what?

We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble. Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. You make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general.

You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline Podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025. I'll be joined by David Roth of Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr. With guest appearances from Behind the Bastards

Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis and a few surprise guests throughout the show. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever else you get your podcasts from.