Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: My Dad’s in the Trunk

Episode Date: January 9, 2015

Farting, Death and Breakfast Burritos... Yup. This Second Date Update has pretty much everything you could possibly ask for. All that's left is the question... "Will James be able to score a Second Date?" Find out in the PODCAST.(Image Courtesy: dan.m86. Creative Commons)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Listen to mini questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal's Second Date Update. A lot of times when you're out

on a first date you do something embarrassing. You embarrass yourself somehow and then you never want to see that person again. Even if they like you they call you they try to get you

on the phone and you're like what happened on the date was just way too embarrassing. I remember I went on a date with this girl a long time ago and we went out on the date

and we were there and there were people coming up recognizing me from the radio and we were leaving and I gave this homeless guy a $100 bill and he cried about how it changed were there and like there were people coming up recognizing me from the radio and we're leaving and i gave like this homeless guy like a hundred dollar bill and he cried about how it changed his life and all this stuff and i was so embarrassed because she had just gone out with the perfect man and i was like there's no way i can continue this i'm so embarrassed that she saw that stuff happen i can't continue it so she tried to call me and i'd

be i just would ignore her calls i knew it was just going to ruin everything for her. And I'm sure she also looked like a supermodel as well, but you had to turn it down. Yeah, and that was it. I felt like I was too attractive for her. All kinds of embarrassing stuff happened on that date. Well, James, who is on the phone with us right now, has an embarrassing story from his date, too. Maybe not as embarrassing as my thing. But something happened on his date that is actually very embarrassing.

Not for him, for the girl that he actually went out with. And that's why he actually very embarrassing not for him for the girl that he actually went out with and that's why he thinks she's not calling him back james what's up man how are you hey what's going on guys so uh the problem on your date wasn't that you were too perfect like i have no not this time okay so tell us a little bit about the girl that you want us to call today her name is lauren yep and where did you meet Lauren? We got set up on a blind date. Was it, wow, was it blind blind or did you Google search or find her on Facebook? Completely blind.

Wow. All new as a person new. That is risky. Yeah, it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what did you guys decide to do when you went out? Well, I didn't want to do anything, you know, high pressure, high stakes, so I just, we got in touch and we met for breakfast one day. Okay how was how did breakfast go you guys enjoyed each other's company even though you hadn't seen each other or known anything about each other yeah i don't want

to sound cliche or anything but i mean it was great i mean that we we had about an hour date and it just flew by. She was stunning. You know, when she walked up for the first time, she was absolutely beautiful. So that, you know, I guess that's a lot of the anxiety of a blind date was out the window. What was her reaction to you? I mean, did you pick up on anything? Did she seem similarly, you know, satisfied?

Yeah, I mean, we were joking around by the end of it. Like, we were, you know, like we were old pals. She was laughing at my jokes. She was cutting jokes around me. And there was really no awkward lull in the conversation. Just one sort of topic led to the other. James, James, okay, the date sounds great and everything. It sounds awesome. But I want to know about the embarrassing part.

That's what I want to talk about right now. All right, all right. So after we finished breakfast, we didn't have anything to do for a while. So I said, let's just go for a drive, you know, just to drive. No expectations, no nothing like that. So she said, fine, let's do it. That sounds like a great idea. So we hop in my car and we're driving around and we're stopping at, you know,

really nice little parks and little things here and there that just aren't nice to look at. And so while we're driving and we're joking around, and I start to, as Placely, again, nothing expected, but Placely just tickled her side, nudged her on the side, so I just tickled her here, tickled her there, just goofing around. Real quick, James, was she into that? Because tickling somebody on a first date, to me, sounds kind of strange.

Tickling somebody that you've dated for a year even is I know a little bit weird but I mean she was laughing she seemed to have a good time she didn't really stop or push me away and as she's laughing as I'm having a good time she let one fly what did she do after she farted on your first date? She turned the reddest color of red you've ever seen in your life. Did you keep tickling her? Did you say anything to try to act like you didn't notice it? Because, I mean, it wasn't like a silent one where maybe you heard it.

Like, there was no doubt that you heard it and it was from her. Did you start laughing? I mean. I did not know. It's like you put the mute button on the car. It's so hard not to sometimes, though, because farts are so funny. I wouldn't have known how to react in that situation. I think I would have just acted like it didn't happen.

But obviously, it's one of those situations where, like, if you're on an elevator and you smell something, you're like, one of us did it. Yeah. And nobody just, like, will pretend. But unfortunately... I mean, the elevator is safer because, I mean, in a car with two people, it's a pretty short process of elimination. I was going to say, and unfortunately you're stuck with her now because you're on a date. So yeah, I mean, you could tell she was really embarrassed. She was like flinking down in

her seat. She was trying to get as close to the door as possible. Like she was so embarrassed and I, you know, I mean, it happens, you know, I mean, was so embarrassed. It happens. These things happen. What happens is either left or right. I was trying to tell her, it's okay. Don't worry about it. Everyone does it. I do it. We all read that book growing up. It's just a natural thing.

What was her response to that? She was like, thank you. I understand. It's just really embarrassing. She could tell that I was trying, you know, thank you. I understand. It's just really embarrassing. And she could tell that I was trying to help her, but I just, I felt bad for her. I really did, because she was really beating herself up about it, and she didn't really have a reason to. But, I mean, I understand where she was coming from.

Of course. Yeah. Now, I'm assuming your date ended shortly after that. It did. I asked her if she wanted to keep driving or if she wanted to call it, and she said, I think, you know, I really had a great time, but I needed to get going. I she wanted to call it and she said i think you know i really had a great time but i needed to get going i got stuff to do so we drove back to the restaurant where we had breakfast and that's where her car was and we sort of did that you know awkward goodbye where we both kind of still have the seat belt on but we hugged

your driver's side right okay and um i asked, can I call you or can I text you? Can I see you again? And she told me she would text me or she would call me. And you haven't heard anything from her at all? No, not a thing. Have you tried to get a hold of her? Yeah, I've texted her a couple times. And I called her once and it went right to voicemail.

But otherwise, nothing. I can't imagine being so embarrassed about one fart that you wouldn't ever call a guy again. Especially when the guy is expressing so much interest in you. Yeah, but girls don't fart. We don't think about that. And if she wasn't embarrassed before, now all of Seattle knows what you did. Very embarrassed now. All right, well, we're going to play a song.

Come back, call her, and get your second date update, okay? All right, thanks, man. All right, hold on. Moving 92.5 Brook and Jubal in the morning. Second date update. You know, James, I think I know how you screwed up on your first date.

Yeah? Yeah. I was thinking about it. James wants us to call this girl named Lauren today. They went out on a breakfast date. It was all good and everything else, but the most important part of the date that we need to remember is she farted on their first date because he was tickling her. And then she was very embarrassed about that, and the date ended shortly after, and he thinks that she's not calling him back because she's embarrassed. And she probably was very embarrassed, and I think, James, the mistake that you made on your date was after she did that after she tooted you just try to make her feel better by consoling her being like oh don't worry about it everybody does it what you should have

done was fart yourself absolutely louder than her and then you guys could have like a little fart battle in the car and then it would be cute be like see everybody does it you know that's actually a good idea if i had that talent i might have yeah if you could do it on command all right you're ready to call her and see if the reason that she isn't calling you back is because of Fartgate? Yeah.

Let's do it. All right, man. Dial the phone right now. Hello? Hi. Can I speak to Lauren, please?

It's she. Hey, Lauren. how are you? This is Jubal from Brooke and Jubal in the Morning. Where are you calling from? Brooke and Jubal in the Morning, the radio show. Okay. Why are you calling? I'm calling because we do a segment on our show called The Second Date Update.

It's where if you go out on a date with somebody and then aren't calling them back and they email us to see if we can get you on the phone and ask if something went wrong okay i didn't email anyone i know you didn't even ask okay somebody emailed us about you though about me yeah you recently went out on a date with one of our listeners? Okay. His name is James. Oh my God. You remember going out with James? You know what? I don't think this is a good idea for me to talk to you. Really?

Can I just tell you real quick what he said about you? Because I really would like for you guys to go out again because he liked you a lot. Well, first of all, he shouldn't have said anything about me. Okay.

Well, he told us about your first date, and he told us about the embarrassing incident. What do you mean? Well, he said that during the date, he was kind of tickling you, and you were messing around, and then you passed gas. Oh, Lauren. He told you that? Yes, he did. It's okay. Don't be embarrassed.

But it's not a big deal, and that's a big deal. First of all, it's not even about being embarrassed. I cannot believe he would... What was the whole point of him calling you and he called you to tell you that so you could just embarrass me on the radio? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Not at all, Lauren. He called and told us that because when we

do this segment, we always talk to people about the date that they went on to figure out if there's anything awkward that happened. Well, that's really messed up. He shouldn't have told you that because it's private. Okay. I'm sorry about that. The only reason he told us that, though, was because he thought that's why you weren't calling back because you were embarrassed. No. This is so f***ed up. He should be

embarrassed. He's a complete weirdo. Like, I thought he was a psycho, and obviously he is. Why do you think he's a psycho? First of all, it was like weird that he was tickling me, by the way. That's, like, so weird. I thought that. Okay, so you sound like you don't like him very much before we let you.

Yeah, I mean, like, I'm sorry. If you would like to know what a weirdo he is, I'm happy to tell you because, obviously, he has no problem calling a radio station and telling them something personal about me. I would love to hear what a weirdo he is, and I'm sorry. You shouldn't be embarrassed. We're not trying to embarrass you at all. No. It's more just so James can know why you're not calling him back. Well, so we went out for breakfast on our date because like I wanted to make sure he wasn't a weirdo and it was actually nice. And then he wanted to know if

I wanted to take a drive. It was a really nice day out. And on the drive, it was beautiful. It was like the perfect day and so we just stopped some parks like we just stopped at various places but then when we got to one like place and he pulled over and i was like oh i thought he was gonna try to make out with me and he told me that he had something he wanted to show me so he got out of the car and i got out of the car and he walked me back to the trunk of the car. Oh, my gosh. That is scary already. Lauren, what was going through your mind at that moment?

I was worried that there was going to be, like, a sledgehammer, but I was hoping it would be, like, I don't know, like maybe he was getting a jacket or something. You know what I mean? I was like, maybe he was getting a jacket. Right. So he opened the trunk, and he pulled out an urn. Okay. Like a silver urn. Okay.

Like a silver urn. Weird. And he said, this is really important to me. Like, this is really special to me. This is my father. What? Whoa. Yeah.

That's a little bit heavy for a first date. Yeah, and I didn't even know what to think. I was just silent. Like, I didn't even ask anything. I didn't want to know anything about it at that point. And then he just says, because my father really loved birds, and so whenever I'd drive to someplace beautiful and see bird feeders, I'd stop because it was his final wish that I'd sprinkle his ashes into the bird feeders so he can be free with the birds.

Oh, wow. That is, that's kind of weird. I mean, if that's his father's last wishes, that's one thing. But to do that with you on a first date, like, hey, we're going to share this special experience and feed my dad's father's ashes to some birds, I could see how that would kind of turn you off a little bit, Lauren. That's at least third date material. Come on. Yeah. Did you guys spread ashes together?

Yeah, because I thought he was going to kill me, because I was like, how did his father die? Like, did he kill his dad? Not natural causes, bro. Wow. All right. I can see why that turns you off then, Lauren. That's kind of strange. Yeah.

I was just, like, so relieved, honestly, when I got home and I was not dead. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Hey, Lauren. Yeah. He's also on the other line right now. Are you serious?

I am. I'm sorry. Hi, Lauren. Oh, my God. I'm just a little offended that, you know, I decided to open myself up and let you in on something, you know, personal and special to me, and then you judge me by it, you know? What? First of all, here's the thing. I'm really sorry to hear about your dad, but you need to understand that that's actually not what you did like like i didn't even

know your dad was dead like if we've been dating for a while fine maybe but not only was it our first date it was the first time that i met you like so did you know we were going to do that like that's weird no i had no intention but we were driving and i saw the birds and i said you know there's birds everywhere you would pull over a bird make it to my dad and at the same time you know see what kind of connection i have with this girl that i had a great time at breakfast with had a great time talking to had a great time driving with and i thought you know maybe she was kind of real. Maybe she was a little bit

deeper than just a puddle. Are you serious? Because I am weirded out. You pulled out an urn on our first date. I'm shallow. It's a little bit because you can't understand why I'm doing it. It is weird that you would take me to the trunk of your car,

pull out an urn of your dad's ashes on our first date, and then feed the birds with it. I mean, I didn't get weird when, you know, you told me about all these traditions you have with your grandma and all these other things. That is f***ing different. I was telling you what we used to make on Thanksgiving. If I told you that she was dead and I baked her ashes into a pie and heated everything on Thanksgiving, then it would be the same. Must I remind you that I overlooked the fact that you completely stunk up my car. That is so f***ed up.

Like, by the way, it's like completely weird also to tickle people on the first date. Oh, yeah. We forgot about the tickling thing. Very true. Well, it sounds like you two just had a wonderful time together, and that would mean that I need to ask Lauren if she would like to go

on a second date with James. We'll pay for you on a second date. No? You answered before I was even done asking the question, Lauren. No. I'm sorry.

I just can't. I understand that this is very personal to him, but I cannot say. All right. James, I'm sorry, man. No second date for you. Can't blame her

for trying to go. Yeah. Maybe just wait a little while to bust out your dad's ashes on a date. You know?

I could probably try that out. Yeah. Try that and then also wait a little while to bust out the tickling on a date.

Yes. She should not order the burrito. Broken Jubal in the morning. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more.

Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine.

A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast, and now, Minnie Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson.

Listen to Minnie Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers.