Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: Put a Baby In Me

Episode Date: April 18, 2017

A woman emailed the show, tyring to reconnect with a guy she recently went out with... BUT, she doesn't want another date with him. She doesn't even want a friendship. What she wants is one of the craziest things we've ever heard on our show. The question is... can she actually get what she wants? Find out in the PODCAST.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you by the IHOP Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from.

The woman on the phone to do a second date update today officially has an idea for the craziest second date I've ever heard. Really? What? And that's all she wants from the dude that she wants to call is one more date. Really? That's it. Wow. Her name is Virginia. What's up, Virginia?

How are you? Good. How are you guys? Good. Your email was very, very interesting. Yeah. I can't tell if you're doing like good crazy or bad crazy right now. Yeah, me too.

I mean, I know it sounds crazy, but I know what I want. Okay. I mean, I can appreciate that in a woman. We'll talk about what you want in just a second. But first of all, tell us about the guy that you want to call. Okay. His name is Jordan. We went volunteering at a community outreach event.

Okay. Yeah, he was like so nice and obviously very community minded. And honestly, he was, like, so nice and obviously very community-minded. And honestly, he was physically everything I am looking for. Okay, so he's got a good heart and a good bod. Yeah, he has got beautiful blue eyes, brown hair, and he's, like, 6'2", and really, like, physically well-built. You sure you're not describing me? Yeah. Wow.

Did we go on a date, Virginia? I don't remember going on a date with you at all. No, I said he's 6'2", not 2'6". So she has seen a picture of you. I heard it wrong. Sorry. So you thought he was hot. Yeah, he was just, like, the full total package.

Okay, and were you hitting on him during this volunteer activity? I would say it was like pretty mutual. And I asked him to go out for coffee. Awesome. And we were talking for like 30 or 40 minutes, I would say, you know, getting to know each other, all about his family, comes from a great family. All that the first date small talk was awesome. awesome yeah and like all the things he's saying about himself or like all the boxes you want checked it sounds like truly like he checked every single one of my necessary boxes and i realized pretty quickly that like he's exactly the guy i've been looking for just not to date that brings us to the most interesting part of

your email. Why would you not want to date him? He's hot. He's nice. He does good things. He's got a good family. Yeah. I mean, I don't want to date him.

I want him to actually get me pregnant. What? See? I told you guys. So you want to call this guy today not to ask him out on a second date to, like, have dinner. You want to call to see if he'll go out again so that he can give you a baby. Yeah, pretty much. I've been looking to have a baby for a really long time.

All of my friends have babies. I'm ready to be a mom. I'm just not really looking for the relationship. You can't just ask someone to get you pregnant. Why not? It's true. You can ask him to someone to get you pregnant. Why not? It's true. I mean, you can ask him to do whatever you want. All he has to say is no. And I will say, commendable for asking. Instead of, I mean,

there's other ways women can get pregnant without anybody ever knowing, you know? Yeah, and some girls ask for weirder things, I'm just saying. I don't know about that. That's true. I had one girl ask if I could open her door sometimes. Oh. It would have been way easier with the pregnancy thing. Yeah. So she was a weird girl, though.

You don't want to maybe date them and see if it leads to love and marriage and then eventually babies? No, I'm not interested. And, you know, I've done my research. I've thought about this. And I just feel like this is the right thing to do. Like, I have been on a lot of dates with guys that I thought could be the one and they never were and relationships are messy and i'm ready for the mess of a baby not the mess of a relationship and i just really need your guys help to help me facilitate it

so did you tell him on your first date did you tell him on your first date that you wanted this from him no i didn't okay because i was gonna say that's probably the reason he's not calling you back. Yeah, I mean, well, that's kind of where I need your great help because, you know, I've watched a couple messages. I've called him. I've texted him so I can tell him about this. And he's kind of ghosting me. And I'm now kind of at the point where I'm like, okay, you are the one. You know, you're it.

Okay, can I ask you, I mean, you want a baby. It sounds like you've done your due diligence in making sure that that's really where you want to be in your life. Why not go through a sperm bank and do like the doctor route? Well, I found doing all of that, that it is so expensive and I have a lot of money saved up for when the baby is actually here. I just feel like, why should I pay, you know, hundreds of thousands of dollars to try to get pregnant when I can do it for free?

Yeah. And this way is a lot more fun than the doctor route. Yeah. And like, I think he's getting a pretty good deal. He doesn't have to be involved. I don't need his help. I don't need a relationship. What? You know? Yeah, but there's no way. I mean, it's hard for me to believe that any guy is going to believe you when you say that.

Yeah. I will drop some paperwork. My mom's a lawyer. I can have her draft up something that will just say he doesn't have to be involved. He doesn't want to, you know? And there you go. I feel like that's the best possible option. You know what I mean?

He's getting off pretty much scotch-free. He has a couple good nights until it's a done deal. And then, you know, if he wants to be involved, he can, but I don't need him to be. You know it could take you, like, a year or more to get pregnant, right? Yeah, but, you know, that's a risk I'm willing to take. And plus you said that he's really hot, so I'm sure you don't have a problem. Like, man, I hope this takes like two years. I mean, I really hope it doesn't take two years.

But honestly, what guy does not like some friends with benefits? Yeah. And you know he's single, right? Yeah. Okay. Okay. Well, we'll play a song, come back, call him, and see if we can get a second date update for you so you can get pregnant.

Thanks, guys. I never thought I'd say something like that. We'll do it right after this. Hold on. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Second date update. If you're just joining us for today's second date update, Virginia is on the phone and Virginia wants to call a guy named Jordan.

And who is Jordan? That's right. Jordan might be Virginia's baby daddy someday because she doesn't really want a second date in the traditional meaning of a second date. She wants Jordan to get her pregnant. We talked to her just a second ago. They met at a community outreach thing. They went and had some coffee, and according to her, he was everything that she ever wanted in a man. But she doesn't want a relationship with him.

She literally just wants him to get her pregnant. So we're about to call him, find out why he's not calling her back. And then Virginia, I think I'm going to let you ask him that question. Okay. Okay. All right. Well, I'm going to dial his phone over right now and get ready to blow his mind. Okay.

Let's do it. All right. Good luck to you, Virginia. Hello? Hey, is Jordan there? Speaking. Jordan, how are you, man? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning.

Did I say that again? Who are you? Jubal from the radio show Brook and Jubal in the Morning. Uh, I, okay. It's a radio program. Jubal from the radio show, Brick and Jubal in the Morning? Okay. It's a radio program. You can hear it on the radio in the morning. Great. Cool. Glad we got that out of the way.

Is there a reason that you're calling me? You went out on a date with a girl named Virginia a little while ago. Should I say you had coffee with a girl named Virginia? Yes. Okay. Well, had coffee with a girl named Virginia? Yes. Okay. Well, Virginia liked you a lot. Okay.

And so she emailed us because she wanted to see if we could get you on the phone since you aren't answering any of her phone calls or text messages. Okay. It's a segment we do on our show called The Second Date Update. That's exactly what it is. If somebody gets blown off, they enlist our help to get you on the phone and find out why. So is there a reason that you don't want to go out with Virginia again? This is very confusing and very odd.

And I don't know if I should be telling you guys anything because I think this is personal. You haven't heard confusing or odd yet. Yeah. Trust me. What do you mean by that? Don't worry about it. I know that this can be a very strange thing to do, but is there a reason that you're not calling Virginia back?

She liked you a lot. Like, a lot, a lot. Truthfully? Yeah. She's really, really lovely and really nice. Good. Just not someone I felt like was a really perfect match. You know what I mean?

And I don't know, maybe it's me. I'm, I'm, I am seeing, you know, a few other women right now and I'm not really looking for anything serious. Okay.

Okay. You sound like a catch the way she described you. I don't know about that, but, but I'm sure she, listen, I'm sure she's not going to have a problem finding a guy, but she's'm sure she's listen i'm sure she's not gonna have a problem finding a guy but she's really i mean i say she's lovely she really is she's really pretty and but i it just was a chemistry issue i don't know i don't know what it was but i think i'm

weird like that to be honest but uh i mean i feel bad about it because i know she's called a few times and i haven't called her back i will admit that um i just uh i think i'm just really picky i mean unfortunately i frustrated i think many women that way yeah but uh i think i'm just really picky i mean unfortunately i frustrated i think many women that way yeah but it's like i mean you went on one coffee date how can you really tell i mean it's nothing against her but i just felt this stronger connection with these other women that i'm seeing so it's nothing to do with her really at the end of the day so that and that's it huh yeah is i don't know if they're supposed to be something else not really no it's just we do these second date updates a lot and usually And that's it, huh? Yeah. I don't know if there's supposed to be something else. Not really, no.

It's just we do these second date updates a lot, and usually somebody's weird on a date or something. It's just kind of boring. You're kind of boring me, Jordan, is what I'm saying. Well, I think I'm a nice guy, so I'm not out to take advantage of people that way. That's good. Yeah, like what Jubal said, boring, rational, logical.

I do feel bad about not calling her, but I don't see a future there. I'm just not interested in going further. Yeah. What if I told you that she doesn't see

much of a future either? What? Well, actually, you know what? I feel better letting her explain this part. Okay, so you won't ever

call me or? No, she's actually on the other line listening and wants to talk to you. Wait, she's on the phone right now, or she's on the line? Yeah, she's on the phone listening, would like to talk to you. Yeah, hi. Hi. This is, uh...

How are you? I, I'm a little confused. I'm sorry if I said anything that was hurtful to you. I certainly don't want you to feel bad about, you know. I don't feel bad at all. I agree with you. I don't see a future for us either, actually.

Okay. Sorry. I guess I was presuming. So what are you talking about? Because I don't know why all these people call me. Can you? Yeah. So I, you know, wanted to talk to you about something. I was just wondering, you know, if we could maybe get together. Um, I have, you know, a pretty important question to ask you and yeah I was just wondering if you'd be willing to do that uh I don't know I uh I think that sounds a little bit like a date right and I thought both of us really aren't interested in that okay fine you know what so I have something

to ask you and it's gonna sound a little crazy and a little bit weird. Um, but I just, I just want to get it out there. Um, I am wondering if you would get me pregnant. I'm so sure that one with the, what'd you just say? Yeah. I mean, this actually might work out perfectly cause we don't have to see each other. We don't have to have a relationship. I just think you check all the boxes for what I want. And I just was wondering if you would get me pregnant. It's a pretty good deal.

I, um, wow. Oh my gosh. I mean, I think we skipped a couple steps, no? I mean, you don't have to be involved. I don't need any monetary support from you. Is this, is this serious?

Are you being serious or are you, is this some, is this like some prank or something? Are you serious? No, I'm dead serious. This is not a prank. This is my real life here. Oh, my gosh. Something I really want. And I just have, I've gone out with so many different guys, and you were amazing and perfect.

And I would be honored if you said yes. Okay, I can't, I can't believe you're actually saying this. Like, you just, you really want me to sleep with you once and we're done. That's it. Well, enough times to get me pregnant. It could be a lot of times. Jordan, she's 100% serious too. This is not a joke, man.

This is so weird. Yeah, this is really weird. I don't know. I don't really know how to answer this. This is a huge question. This is a big deal. Have you ever thought about having kids or being a sperm donor before? I've never thought about kids in any way at all, so this is really weird.

That's a bigger question. You don't have to worry about it. I am the one that will be taking care of it. You don't even have to be in the picture after it's done. Just do what you do best. Do what you do best. That's a big vote of confidence for you, Jordan. Is that what you do best? I have no comment on that.

Oh, my God. There'd be so much pressure going into the bedroom before this. It's like a business deal deal but with your clothes off. Yeah. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I can, I'm guaranteed to panic in that situation right now.

We'll just treat it like a normal date and, you know, you have a guaranteed good time. It will not be, it will not be like a business deal.

Yeah, Jordan, if you go on one more date, you'll know exactly how that thing's going to end. Yeah. 100% success rate. No strings attached. Yeah, Jordan, if you go on one more date, you'll know exactly how that thing's going to end. Yes. 100% success rate. No strings attached. Yeah, I don't know if I would call that a date, to be honest with you.

What if I offered you some money? What if I offered you $10,000 before I get pregnant and then an additional $5,000 when I get pregnant? Whoa! That's a lot of money. What about then? Would you do it then? Um. And you know what? Then I'll also have some legal papers drafted up

so you'll have $15,000 and legal papers that say you don't have anything to do with it. You don't need to be involved at all. How about that? Oh my god. I'm sorry. I cannot believe this is happening. Uh, yeah, I really wish I had coffee. Hey Jordan, would you like to go out on a second date with Virginia? You can make $15,000 and try to make a baby after. And we'll pay for dinner, too.

Oh, wow. What a deal. Sounds like a great night to me, Jordan. Would you do it? Will you pay for college? Yeah, no kidding. That's on Virginia. She can do that.

And child support for the rest of your life? Oh, and the therapy? No, I meant for me. I'm not paying for your therapy, no. But I will pay for dinner so you guys can go out and discuss your transaction further. You know, I'm happy to hang out and see and talk. I'm not going to say right now that, yes, I will get you pregnant, but I will certainly say yes to coffee. Can we just start there?

Congratulations, Virginia. That sounds like you got a second date. That's awesome. We can definitely start there. Oh, my gosh. I wish I could be in that coffee shop and hear what you guys are going to talk about. It would be so awkward for anyone sitting near you. You know, now that I think about it, I will probably need something a little stronger than coffee.

Broken Jubal in the morning. Okay, dudes. Thirsty dudes. You can stop texting in. Okay dudes Thirsty dudes You can stop texting in at 78592 I'll get her pregnant for free Yeah It's Brooke and Jubal in the morning Talking about today's second date update

If you missed it, it was shocking Virginia wanted to call this dude Jordan Forget the particulars of the date and all that stuff. All she wants him to do is get her pregnant. She said she's willing to pay him, sign paperwork and everything. All she wants is just for his baby to be inside her. She wants a seed. That's all she wants.

That's all she wants. Somebody texted in at 78592 and said, no, I had a friend do this. Really? And it's a trap. She said it's not a trap. She just literally went out with this guy and she's been wanting to have a baby for a while. And she went out and was like, this is the dude. This is the one that I want to be the father of my baby, even though I don't want it in the baby's life.

She said he doesn't have to do anything with the baby. Just basically get her pregnant and then leave. And she'd pay him for his time. I mean, it's a live sperm donor. It's what it is. Like, without the clinic, right? We did get another text from a mom that says, she can borrow my three kids for the weekend. Let's see if she still wants to be a mom after that.

Yeah, who cares how beautiful the kids are? So they actually agreed to go out again. And just talk. To have coffee and then talk about it and see if he's willing to do it. We'll definitely try to keep you updated on it. She's pretty convincing. I have a good feeling that she's going to be able to talk him into this. You think so?

I think so. He said yes to talking over coffee. That's the gateway, man, to baby making. I think if he would have said no outright and been like, no, I don't want to go out. I'm not interested. Then it was definitely a no. But I think the fact that he even opened the door means that he's about to be a baby daddy. And, of course, still, the text message.

I told you guys, stop. It's still coming. Stop it. There's so many dudes texting in right now. Dude, I'll do it for free. You don't have to pay me. I'll do it all night long, actually. I'll never stop, dude.

We get it. Shout out to all the horny truckers. I love you guys. Thank you for listening. And your texts always, always, always entertain me. Remember, if you want to do a second date update, all you have to do is email the show, and we will call the person who didn't call you back. Moving 92.5.

We're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general.

You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How To Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025. I'll be joined by David Roth of Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr.

With guest appearances from Behind the Bastards' Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis, and a few surprise guests throughout the show. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from.