Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: Sticks and Stones

Episode Date: October 20, 2016

Over the years, we've heard of many different Grand Romantic Gestures... but what one our listeners did for a girl he met at the bar... is just ABOVE AND BEYOND. Good luck topping this one fellas! Hear it in the PODCAST.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Brooke and Jubal's Second Date Update. You know, a lot of people waste their time trying to find love, online dating, or having friends hook them up with somebody that they think would be perfect when everybody knows the only place to really find true love is in a crowded men's bathroom at a dirty bar. We all know that, right? And that's where Eric found the girl that he wants to call today in the men's bathroom at a bar. What's up, Eric?

Well, that's not entirely true. That's what your email said. Well, she wasn't standing in the bathroom. I was at this bar, and the girl's line was, like, not entirely true. That's what your email said. Well, she wasn't standing in the bathroom. I was at this bar, and the girl's line was, like, down the hall. It was really a long line. She looked, like, pretty upset, so I was like, hey, why don't you use the men's bathroom, and I'll watch the door. Okay, so she did use the men's bathroom. Yes.

And you stood guard and listened to her pee. I don't know about listen. All right, so tell us more about her. I mean, your email said how you met and that she's not calling you back, but how'd your evening go with her? Well, her name was Penny, and she was really nice, so she thanked me for watching the door for her, and I asked her if maybe she wanted a drink,

so we went over to the bar and got a drink together. You are a gentleman, and you even paid, held the door. Yeah, I think we got along really good, just back and forth. I asked her what she did. She asked me what I did for work and everything, which right now I'm out of work currently. So you impressed her with that line. What did you do for work?

It was truthful. I wasn't going to lie to her. That's good. It's good that you didn't say, like, I'm an entrepreneur. Yeah. So what did you guys actually do on your date? We didn't go on a date. Oh, okay.

So she's not calling you back just after this one night you met her at the bar. Yeah, exactly. So when we're at the bar, we're talking and everything. And I wanted to ask her out, see if she wanted to. I didn't know how to do it. And we're just standing there talking and everything. And I saw this rose laying on the bar. So I grabbed the rose, and I gave it to her, and I said, Hey, if you take this and go out with me, I'll get you 12 more. Oh, my gosh. You did not just say that. Did she actually like that?

She loved it, yeah. I mean, she said yes. She took the rose. Did she notice that you stole it from somebody else? No, I don't think so. All right. And so you guys, what, you got her number there? Yeah, we exchanged numbers, and then we texted. It seemed real friendly and everything, and then it just

started to get weird. It seemed a little more distant, so I just asked, like, what's going on? Why the cold shoulder? And then after that, I never got a response. What do you mean it got distant? I don't know. It was like, hey, how you doing? Like, we were leading up to something, and then it just seemed like, it just seemed like something went away. I didn't get it. All right. So you met her this one night at the bar. You had a conversation over drinks after you helped her pee. And you liked her so much that you want to do a second date update just after that meeting? Yeah, I liked her. I really want to go on a date with her. How long did you guys spend together at the bar? Half hour. So after a half hour, you really want to go on a date with her. How long did you guys spend together at the bar?

Half hour. So after a half hour, you're willing to do a second date update? Yeah, half hour's a long time. Got through a lot in a half hour. We talked about a lot. I mean, she was real pretty. Blonde hair, blue eyes. She likes sports.

I mean, she seemed perfect. That sounds like your guys' souls really connected over those drinks. I mean, you don't really know anything about her. Are you sure she's even single? I don't think she would let me buy her a drink. I mean, I hope she's single. Oh, no. Trust me.

She could be married for 40 years, still let you buy her a drink. And give you the number. Yeah. Here's the deal, guys. I never get to meet. I never had the opportunity with someone this pretty and everything. And I feel like I'm almost there. So I really want to to hook up with this girl i really want to talk to her i want to know what's up okay so basically she's the hottest girl that you've ever had a conversation yo i try to talk to a lot of hot girls but uh this is the only one that actually

talks back to me hey i completely understand then why you want to do this why do you think that she's not calling you back then, or why do you think she stopped texting you? I don't know. I mean, I thought everything went fine in the bar. Maybe she saw me grab the rose. I didn't steal it from someone. Maybe she saw me grab the rose off the bar or something. Maybe she thought that was classless.

I don't know. She gave me her number. What was the last thing that you guys said to each other? It was really nice meeting you. I can't wait to go out, and I'll hit you up tomorrow. And what'd she say back? She said, thanks again for watching the restroom. That was really nice of you.

So thanks again for watching the restroom while I pee. And that was it. And that's the last thing you've heard from her? Yeah. All right. Well, we'll play a song, come back, call her, and get your second date update, okay? All right. Sounds good.

All right, man. Hang on. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the Morning's Second Date Update. You know what that is? Uh-oh. Can anybody tell me what that is? No, go with water dripping, water dripping.

That is the sound of a budding new romance. It's like doves. It is, isn't it? It's beautiful. Yeah. And that is why Eric wants to call a girl today in his second date update. Eric is on the phone with us. He told us about how he met this girl at a bar. He met her because she was standing in line for the women's restroom.

It was really long. And he was like, let me be your knight in shining armor. I'll stand guard. You can go in the men's bathroom. And then they struck up a conversation after that. They talked for about 30 minutes, but now she's not texting him back. And he wants to get a hold of her really badly. Why? Because in his own words, she's the hottest girl that's ever actually talked back to him.

So sad. All right, Eric. Are you about ready to give Penny a call and get your second date update? Yes, I am. And Eric, what did Penny do when you guys were talking, I forgot to ask, that gave you the indication that she was legitimately into you? I don't know if it's anything she did. I mean, the fact that she was talking to me for a half hour and then even gave me her

number when I asked for it, that seemed like a good thing. What's your success rate usually when you ask a girl for her number? I don't know. I'd say this went well. I don't know. They usually don't go as good as this. So it's not that good usually. Okay.

Well, I'm going to dial her phone number right now and get her on the phone and see if we can get your second date update, okay? All right, thanks. All right, here we go. Hello? Hi, is Penny there? This is her. My ask is calling.

Yeah, hi, Penny. This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning. It's a radio show. Okay. I'm calling you because one of our listeners actually sent us an email about you and asked if we could get a hold of you. Well, I've never heard of your show, so I don't know anybody that would listen to it. Well, you do actually. You know one person at least who listens to it. And he liked you so much that he wanted us to get a hold of you.

Okay. And who would that be? That would be a guy named Eric that you met at a bar recently. Are you serious? Yes, I am. He sent us an email and told us about how he met you and had been texting back and forth that you really wanted to take you out on a date, but you stopped texting him. So he asked us if we could get you on the phone and find out if something happened. Wow. I'm not sure what you guys know about, I mean, I don't know what he told you. He told us, he pretty much just told us that he met you, you were standing in line for the restroom,

and then he helped you use the guy's restroom. You guys talked at the bar for about a half an hour and have been planning a date, but then you just dropped off the face of the earth. You dropped out of Eric's world and he can't stand it, Penny. So is that true? Did it really happen? Yeah, so that's true. But he was so rude and so clueless to how rude he was that I didn't just drop off the face of the earth. There was very specific reasons why I just decided never to connect with that person again, ever.

Would you mind telling us? Why'd you give the number if he was so rude? I felt bad. Like, I almost kind of felt bad. I mean, this guy was never, ever going to be with a woman. Ever? He'll never be with a woman, ever. What did he do that was so rude?

Well, after he held the bathroom door for me, I made the huge mistake of sitting down for a drink with him. He offered to buy me a drink, which I said yes to. These all sound like nice gentleman things to do so far. They sound really nice. They start off to be really nice gentlemanly things to do. And then he keeps talking and his mouth just doesn't stop moving so he proceeds to troll every girl in line and rate her um based on looks which was really fun as another woman in that bar to sit and listen to somebody do so he's sitting with you and rating all the other girls in the bar oh yeah i don't know if he was bored or he thought this was a great idea but he said

look at all those trolls standing in line and he wanted to just like rate them on a scale of one to ten one by one and i didn't even get to i didn't even get to finish my sentence and he just starts like laying into him did you try to interrupt him and stop him from this oh yeah oh yeah yeah yeah i kept asking him to talk about something else and he was just, I mean, things like, oh that girl, there's a four. I mean, her eyes are too far apart. She's got hairy eyebrows and bad skin. One at a time, like, oh she's like a straight up garden gnome, man. Like she's like short

and squat. I mean, he was just, he was cracking himself up. He thought he was Mr. Funny Ha Ha. I don't think that he has ever, ever had a girlfriend in his entire life because somebody would have stopped this a long time ago. You know, he did tell us that you're the hottest girl that's ever spoke to him. Oh, well, that is a compliment, I'm sure.

I'm surprised he said I was the hottest girl because he actually wanted to rate me as well. What did you say to him when he told you that? I asked if we could not do that. I said, yeah, let's not do the rating thing anymore. Let's move on. Let's try to talk about anything else, anything. And did he give you a rating?

Oh, yeah, he gave me a rating. He was adamant. He said, nope, I'm going to hear the rating because it's a good one. Okay, I'm guessing he's like, oh, you're a 10. Look at all those other 4s and 5s. I'm sitting next to the 10 in the bar. You think he would, because he's trying to hit on me, but no, that ass gave me

a seven plus. What does a seven plus even mean? I guess it's better than a seven, but worse than an eight. And he went on and detailed about why he gave me a seven plus.

Oh. Are you serious? So he actually went into detail, huh? Yeah, yeah, he wanted me a seven plus. Oh, are you serious? So he actually went into detail, huh? Yeah, yeah. He wanted me to know why. What was his reasoning? Well, my teeth weren't perfectly straight enough and I had a nice chest, but it could have been a little bigger. How did you not slap this dude? I think he's just so unaware. Like, it wouldn't do anything. It wouldn't help. It's never going to click with Tim.

He's never had a girlfriend, probably never will. So, yeah, I feel bad for the guy. Well, Penny, thank you for telling us. I appreciate it. You're welcome. It was a complete nightmare with that idiot. And I want to tell you, you know what? In my book, you're an 8 minus.

Not even a seven plus. You upgraded her. That's so sweet. You're welcome. I also want to let you know that he's actually on the other line listening to this conversation

and wants to talk to you. Wait, what? Yeah. He's actually on the phone. Eric? Yeah, I'm here. Wait. Are you kidding me?

Honey, you didn't find that entertaining? Making fun of the girls in line and everything? You were rating them? That's so mean. Dude, that was so mean. I was trying to be nice to you.

It was like I felt like I was stuck with you, man. You bought me a drink. I was like, no, it was no fun. There was no fun there. You were going right along with it. I thought we were having a good time. I knew some of those girls, by the way, that you were making fun of. No, none of that was fun.

Where are you ever going to find another guy like that who would come up with a game like that? You know, I'm a good time. I'm a fun time. We do things like that. Okay, I will hope that I never find another guy like that. And you are anti-fun. That was the most unfun thing I think I've ever done. Ever.

I mean, you got the best rating out of everyone. Wow. You're bragging about giving me a seven plus? Like, out of ten? A seven plus in that bar is like a ten,

you know? Every other girl is a five. I'm the best bad-looking girl at that bar is what you're saying. I wasn't trying

to insult you. You're hot. You're beautiful. You're hot. I just got a seven and a half one compared to the scale we were working on.

You see, guys? Listen to this. You're clueless, man. You are so clueless. Listen, I know what women want, okay? I know what they need. I don't know what you're talking about. It sounds like it's Eric.

She just doesn't know what she needs. Penny, would you like to go on a second date with Eric? We'll pay for it. Absolutely not. Not ever again. I hope I never talk to you again. No, no, no, please. Why don't you just go find another 7 Plus to insult?

Because I am done listening to this. Oh, nice. Very nice. The only reason you're not going to go out with me is because you're totally frigid, and I don't need a girl like that. Oh, my God. You are an imbecile. Yes.

Absolute imbecile. Well, not a girl like that. Oh, my God. You are an imbecile. Yes. An absolute imbecile. Well, not a successful second date update for you, Eric. Penny, thank you for sharing your story. Yep. Eric, I'm sorry about that. I'm sorry you didn't get a date. Yeah, that's okay. Don't worry.

I mean, I told her she was a 7+, but she was only a 5, believe me. Oh, really? Hey. Hey, ass. They're done talking to you. It's time for you to go now. Broken Jubal in the morning. Text in at 78592 that says, hey, seven is a good rating.

She must think she's Beyonce or something. It's Broken Jubal in the morning. Going to talk about the second date update in just a second. But remember, if you have any legal issues that you need help with, why don't you hit up my friends at advocateslaw.com. I figure this is the perfect time to talk about it. Absolutely. Right before we discuss the second date update you pay nothing to talk to an attorney so hit them up whether it's like something with your car insurance or you have a work issue you were hurt at work

and you need some help just ask them advocates law comm their numbers 206 512 35 55 now on to the second date update Eric wanted to call a girl named penny she wasn't calling him back after they met at a bar. We got her on the phone and found out why she wasn't calling him back. It's because after they met, they were sitting there having drinks at the bar. He bought her a drink and then proceeded to rip on every single female

that was in attendance at the bar. I think in hopes of being like, you're the hottest girl in here. But then he rated her a 7+. He didn't even be like, you're a 10. Brutally honest, I guess. But even still, it's not how he thought that was a fun game for people to just put

other people down. Nobody wants to participate in that, dude. Oh, I would. I would love to do that on a date. If I could meet a girl who's just like, hey, let's just sit here and rip on people for a while. I'd be like, I love you. You're the best. Another text in at 78592 that says, honestly,

I thought he was kind of sweet. What? I think it'd be fun to sit and rate people. Give him my number. So some people do actually want to do that.

So yeah, he just sat there ripping on everybody the whole time and she obviously didn't want to go out with him again so they agreed

not to go out. And I'm sure he was a real, you know, eight plus on the scale too. Of course. Because the people who usually rate others are always gorgeous.

I think it's something that most dudes do. Like we do it sometimes, but never with a girl. Like you're supposed to. Yeah. Well, that's the whole thing, right? Do you guys really sit and rate women? Well, sometimes.

I don't know. I mean. Sit and rate women, rate dudes. Just sit and look at people and judge them. That's the fun part of life. Especially when you're better than everybody else is just sitting there and judging people. Apparently I'm missing out.

I think it's just part of the whole thing where some dudes have like the part of their game is to insult, you know, like, Hey, you don't walk up to a girl and be nice to her. You gotta be like, Hey, like you look okay. Like for a chubbo. And then apparently that's supposed to get you some points or something like that. That's hard to get when you just make people self-esteem. So they agreed not to go out again. Remember, if you want a second date update,

all you have to do is email the show, and we will call the person who didn't call you back and hopefully find out what you did wrong. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more.

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