Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: Tame the Beast

Episode Date: October 4, 2019

ALL MEN have an INNER BEAST that tells them to HUNT for food and CHASE women... and every guy needs a special woman to TAME his inner Beast... And, one of our listeners thinks that he has FINALLY found the girl that can do it for him... Except she wont call him back. Listen to Jubal help him in this podcast!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Rook and Jubal's Second Date Update The definition of a gentleman has changed a lot over the years. It used to be you'd open up the door for a lady or maybe tip your cap when she entered the room. I wish that still happened.

Pull out her chair and then wait until she's about to sit down and pull it out even more so she falls. No! But nowadays, the definition of a true gentleman is just somebody who can fight back the grinders. Seriously, that is true. Just somebody to fend off all the thirsty dudes at the club trying to grind on you. And that's who's on the phone today for a second date update. A real life gentleman. His name is Tim.

Tim, what's up? Yeah, yeah, what's going on? Tim, you were able to fight those type of dudes off? Man, I can do it all day long, man. I'm a trained combat specialist. You are like a superhero, sir. Like a gentleman ninja. Yes!

Your email said you met the girl that you want to call today at the club because you were fighting off the other dudes that were trying to grind on her? Yeah, man. You know, I see something I like, you know, I just go for it. You know, and I'm not taking no for an answer, so that's what happened. Okay, so how does that work? Did you, like, try to box them out like you're playing basketball or something? I mean, how do you fight off the grinders?

No, you know, it was simple, man. I saw her on the dance floor, so I'll do all up on her, and I was just like, you know what, I'm going to go beat Captain Save-O real quick. So I went over there. I started doing all my dance moves, you know what I'm saying. I hit her with the kickstand. That's what really got her attention. You know, I hit her with the kickstand. That's what really got her attention. I hit her with the kickstand, and from there it was on the cracking, man.

That's actually really impressive. So the kickstand, just to clarify, is a dance move. Yeah, yeah, that's a dance move. I've been doing that since the mid-'90s, man, so that's my go-to. It's like breakdancing, right? What's her name, first of all? Her name was Taryn. She was beautiful.

She was attractive. Long, curly hair. She was definitely somebody I've never seen at the club before because I kind of get in on the first-name basis. You know what I'm saying? I'm out there that much. I haven't seen her around, so I was definitely like, whoa. So wait, you go into a club and everybody knows you by your first name

is what you're saying? Yeah, at least I like to think so. But no, you go into a club and everybody knows you by your first name is what you're saying. Yeah, at least I like to think so. But no, I go to this club all the time, you know. And so I saw her. I hadn't seen her before. So I was like, OK, you go a newbie. You know, it's kind of like rookie hazing almost. How did she react when you fended off all the other dude humpers out there?

Well, she was definitely impressed by my ninja skills. And so I asked her if, you know, we can hang out outside for a little bit. And, you know, I like to keep it slow. You know, I don't like to, like, rush into it. So we went outside. You know, I'm a smoker. I didn't know if she smoked. I kind of assume everyone these days smokes.

So I offered her a cigarette. I think you should assume the opposite, sir. Like, no one smokes anymore. I didn't know if she smoked. I kind of assumed everyone these days smokes, so I offered her a cigarette. I think you should assume the opposite, sir. Like, no one smokes anymore. No one smokes anymore? Well, okay, well, let me put it this way. So I offered her a cigarette, and she said, you know, I don't smoke. And I was like, well, of course, neither do I.

These are e-cigarettes. So, yeah, of course, no one smokes anymore. You know, we're smoking e-cigarettes. Still kind of smoking, though. I mean, kind of. I mean, it's like smoking foreplay. Kind of. I don't know. I mean, so, you know, I offered her an e-cigarette,

and I don't think she was too crazy about that idea. So I went ahead, took a couple of puffs, and we went back inside. And when you guys went back inside, did you hang out for a while after that? Was everything cool, or was she turned off by the smoking? No, no. We definitely hung out for a little bit. We talked a little bit, and she was just kind of like, I don't know, man, like a deer in headlights to the whole scene, I guess,

because I don't know if she ever went to a club before or if she was like a 40-year-old virgin or something like that. I don't know. But I think I kept her entertained, and I was definitely on my A game that night. So I got her number, and I think it went great. And so when you guys left, did she, like, leave with her friends? You left with your friends, and you didn't say much else to each other?

Right, well, you know, right, right. I didn't take her home or anything like that. I'm kind of a gentleman, you know. But I did text her that night and just, you know, told her goodnight, and I look forward to speaking with her again or seeing her again. So, yeah. And did she text you back? So herein lies the rub, right?

You know, I sent her a text, told her I'm looking forward to seeing her again. A few hours go by. A day goes by. Nothing. I heard nothing. So another day goes by and, you know, I finally get a text from her and she says, sorry, I've just been busy. And of course, I'm just like, well, okay, tell me about it.

You know, you don't just kind of like lead with that and then nothing, right? So, you know, kind of like chiming in and like, you know, what's going on? Let's hang out. Nothing. Another day goes by. I mean, this is literally like going on for a week and like all I'm getting from her is just like, you know, I've been busy. So she's blowing you off, it seems like. I mean, that's such an ugly word, but yeah, that's definitely what it seems like.

And why do you care so much? To be honest with you, like I said, I go to this club a lot. I kind of go out and like to have a nice time and party but i don't really run into too many girls that i would say you know what i can i can really settle down with this one here and offer my last name to her you know i mean just really see myself having a future with her so i think that's why i care so much and i haven't i haven't had that happen okay after hanging out with her at the I think that's why I care so much. I haven't had that happen. Wow, after hanging out with her at the club for a couple hours,

you feel that strongly? I do. I do. I do. I hope this works out then. Yeah. Oh, definitely. I mean, I do too if I can ever hear from her. Alright, well, we'll play a song, come back, call her, and get your second date update, alright? Alright, cool. Okay, hang on.

I got a condo in Manhattan. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Second date update. If you're just joining us for today's second date update, every dude has it happen once in their life where they meet the woman that can tame the beast inside them. Ooh. And get him to settle down. And Tim is on the phone with us right now,

and Tim wants his beast tamed. Whoa, okay. Now it got dirty. It got dirty real quick, Jubal. Isn't that right, Tim? You need your beast tamed, don't you? I absolutely do. I love the sound of that, yeah.

I bet you do, Tim. Tim met a girl named Taryn at the club. He met her because, like, other dudes were dancing on her and he went up and saved her from all those guys and then they hung out for a little while. But after that, she keeps texting him saying that she's busy and she can't hang out. And it's kind of obvious that she's trying to blow him off a little bit. But Tim says

that he thinks that he could see a future with her after hanging out for just one night. So he really wants to get her on the phone and find out why she won't go out with him. Tim, you ready? Yeah, I'm ready, man. Let's do it. All right.

Well, we're going to call Taryn right now and see if we can get her on the phone. Here we go. Hello? Hi, is this Taryn? Yeah, who's this? This is Jubal from Brooke and Jubal in the morning. How are you? I'm Yeah, who's this? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning. How are you? I'm sorry, say that again?

This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning. It's a radio show. Uh, okay. Okay. You a big-time listener? Um, I mean, I listen to the radio. Okay, we're on it, which is cool. In general.

All right, so you may not have heard us before, but at least you've heard of the radio. And we have a radio show, and one of our listeners actually asked us if we could call you. Really? Yeah. His name is Tim. Tim. Tim. Oh, Tim?

Whoa, why did he call you guys? Because he said he really liked you, and now you're kind of blowing him off. Like, you're telling him you're busy all the time, and you won't meet up for a second date. Oh, my gosh. Are you serious? Wait, are you laughing because you're flattered and excited, or are you laughing because Tim's lame? Um, a little of both, I guess. Really? Of everything.

So you're kind of excited, but also he's kind of lame. I wouldn't say lame. He's kind of corny. He looks like he might be an okay guy, but I don't know really how to take it. I barely talk to him. I text him a couple times.

We talked to him about your date. Date? What do you mean, date? How about this? The night you met then, if it wasn't a date, really. Yeah. He told us about that. He told us how he kind of saved you from some other dudes who were trying to dance with you,

and then you guys ended up hanging out for a while. No way. Saved me from some other dudes? Yeah, he said, you know, like the guys on the club that try to hump your leg for a while. No way. Save me from some other dudes? Yeah, he said, you know, like the guys on the club that like try to hump your leg for too long. He said he rescued you from them. If he was one of the guys that was humping my leg, then he saved me from himself. But I was doing perfectly fine.

Okay, so he didn't save you necessarily, but did you enjoy hanging out with him? I mean, he was just coming off like kind of like machismo. Like he talks to a lot of women or talks to women all the time. So I was just like, that was my first time going to that place. And I mean, it seems like he was kind of popular too. Cause you know, it was like all the waitresses were coming all over him and, you know, they were like high fiving him and he was like the party guy popular too. Cause you know, it was like all the waitresses were coming all over him and you know, they were like high fiving him and he was like the party guy, I guess,

you know? So you think he's a player and that's why you don't want to go out with him? Uh, yeah. Cause I don't really date a lot of people. I'm pretty selective just because nowadays you just never can be too short. So I just rather not spread my energy too thin. That is actually really smart. Yeah, he just came across almost like a little bit cheesy too. So if he would have been more sincere and kind of like, I don't know, more vulnerable about who he was, would you have given him a shot then? I don't know.

I don't know who his real self is, but he came across like, you know, he has a monster truck or something. I don't know. It's weird. Okay. It's funny that you say people have ulterior motives because I need to let you know that he's actually on the other line listening right now and wants to talk to you. What the f***? Are you serious? Yes, I am.

Best response ever. Tim, are you there? Hey, yeah, I'm here. What's going on, Taryn? How you doing? Oh, hi, Tim. It's going on, Taryn? How you doing? Oh, hi, Tim. It's nice to hear your voice. Uh, yeah, nice to hear yours, too.

Tim! That's convincing. That's the Taryn I know and love. Oh, my gosh. This is crazy. So, you kind of surprised by all of this, or what? Yes! Like, what is going on? Oh, my gosh. This is crazy. So you're kind of surprised by all of this or what? Yes. Like, what is going on? Like, what is this? I just haven't heard from you, so by any means necessary,

I needed to hear your voice and wanted to get in contact with you again, hang out some more. And you definitely made an imprint on my life and in my heart, so I'd like to talk to you some more. Wow. I mean, that's really sweet, Tim. This is all very flattering, but I don't know if you've been listening, but, you know, you kind of came across as someone that's like really not my type. Like I'm more of a laid back. I want someone who's just, you know, calm, relaxed, who can be themselves. And I really didn't get that vibe from you.

So I don't know. I don't feel like you would be a good match, you know? I tend to disagree with you on that because I think we – that's actually the type of guy I am. I mean, for a second, just think about our names. Tim and Taryn, they both start with T's. T and T, I mean, we're both dynamite together, right? Oh, my God, Tim. That's what she's talking's. T and T, I mean, we're both dynamite together, right?

Oh, my God, Tim. That's what she's talking about. Do not do that. Oh, God. It doesn't get more perfect than that. Exactly. I feel like you have a book in your back pocket that you study before you talk to a girl. Like, that is just not what I'm talking about.

I'm just naturally smooth like that. I mean, if there was something to study, then of course I'd study you. What? No, Tim, stop! You're not hearing what she's saying at all. What do you mean? Tim, she wants someone to, I don't know, bare their soul to her, essentially. I mean, that's kind of intense, but... Okay,

no, I get it. I get it. I'm trying to impress you. A little nervous and all that good stuff, but it's because I really like you. You know, and again, I don't say that too often. I don't say that to everyone. You definitely just struck my heart. You know, the night I saw you and I thought we had a great conversation. You had a beautiful smile and not too many girls are OK with, you know, e-cigs, you know, and I was smoking my e-cig. Stop there. Stop there, Tim. No more. That's love right there if somebody is cool with their e-cig.

Forget that part, Taryn. Listen to everything else he said before. That was actually really good. That was sweet. We talked to Tim for a little bit before we called you, and he said all that stuff to us too. He's really into you. Well, yeah. I mean, that's sweet and everything, but i just don't

know i don't know if we're in the right space or me especially you know for you know where he's trying to go with it why don't you find out by going out with him again would you go out with tim on a second date we will pay for it taryn taryn before you say anything before you answer that i just want you to know and i mean this from the bottom of my heart we'll go out again i know they mentioned they'll pay for it, but if the check bounces, it's on me, baby. Smooth.

Oh my God. Does this guy ever stop? Like, are you serious? I want us to be like Kanye and Kim, you know? I want us to be like Oprah and Stedman, you know? Oprah and Stedman. What? No one's even sure Oprah's really with Stedman. Oprah and Stedman. What?

No one's even sure Oprah's really with Stedman. Like, no. Well, you know, some good things come to an end. But, you know, we can try. Let's just try that. Tim, you are definitely a funny, charming guy. I think you'd probably be wonderful for the right girl. However, I just

don't see our yin and yang matching up. I don't think we would be a good fit, so I'm going to have to pass on the second date. Really? I thought you'd give him a second chance. I really thought I would too, but he couldn't turn it off, so I don't want it. Karen, look, we don't even have to

even address the yin yang part until you're ready like that's how serious i am i'm i'm ready to you know lay it down put everyone to the side you know i mean i'll burn the black book if i have to get myself a metro pps mobile you know track phone and get rid of all my contacts. I mean, I will do that. He's ready to end everything and just focus on you, Taryn. Are you sure? You know what, Tim? I'm going to reward your persistence and I'm going to tell you, yes,

I will go on the second date with you. Whoa! What was that? You're serious, Taryn. You'll go out with him again? Just one day. That's it. I'm not making any promises or anything else, but I will give him a real official date.

We'll do that. Woo! Yes! That's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm talking about, you know? This is like my Rocky Balboa moment. This is like when Rocky got the shot at the champ, Apollo Creed, man. This is what I'm talking about, Taryn.

You don't know how much. You know, we're going to do the world a favor. We just did the world a favor. You and I together, I'm telling you. Oh, my gosh. Tim, Tim, Tim, please do not make me regret my decision. Please do not make me regret. You won't regret it.

I'm so pumped to go out with you. That's all. You will not regret this. I promise. You hear that, Taryn? It sounds like you've tamed the beast. Oh, I don't even know what that means, but we'll see. She tamed the beast.

She tamed it. Oh, my God. Broken Jubal in the morning. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly

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