Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update PODCAST: The Sneeze

Episode Date: July 27, 2015

When one of our listeners (David) emailed us, saying that the "worst possible thing that could happen on a first date" happened to him, we weren't sure if we could believe him... but as it turns out, he was SPOT on. How will David come back from this? Hopefully he can do it in a Second Date Update!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money Podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch

your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors,

it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast. And now, Minnie Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe,

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He didn't say what it was. I'm really interested to find out. But before we do that, David, how are you? Hey, guys. I'm doing good. How about yourself? Good. You're recovering from whatever gross thing happened on your date? Yeah, man. It was very embarrassing on my part,

at least. Okay. I want to find out what that is, but before we get there, first, let's find out about your date. What's her name? Bridget. Bridget. Okay. And where'd you meet Bridget? We actually met on an online dating site. Okay. Have you done a lot of online dating prior to this? No. I'm actually quite the novice to it, but I've been single for a while. Okay. Have you done a lot of online dating prior to this? No, I'm actually quite the novice to it, but I've been single for a while. Let me ask you this. After this gross thing happened, will you ever online date again? I will for sure. I'm not sure she will though. Now I'm really, really curious. What'd you guys do on your date? We actually went to dinner by the waterfront. And how did that go?

Everything at dinner was great. You know, we were getting to know one another, just learning a lot about her. You're right. Gross. Oh, stop it. Oh, God, that is disgusting. Actually having conversation. Ew.

That is nasty. When you guys were in the middle of the date, did you feel like, oh, gosh, this is even better than I expected since you hadn't been online dating much? Absolutely. I was 100% enthused. I was all about it. If everything went so well, why do you think she's not calling you back? Because of the gross thing. The gross thing was horrible. I'm thinking that she's not responding to me. Okay, now I have to know what it is. What's the gross thing that happened on your date? Well, let me set it up for you.

After dinner, her and I, we decided to just take a nice little stroll down the waterfront, you know. Nice. Enjoying the scenery, you know, the sights and sounds. We decided to grab some ice cream, you know. I was trying to be cute and charming, you know, a little ice cream after dinner. This sounds romantic so far. Yeah, you know, that's what the angle I was going for. Yeah.

And so we're walking, and we get to the end, and it was perfect. It was beautiful. The sun was setting at the most opportune time. It just felt right. My instinct felt right. It was like at the moment, you know? And that's when you messed your pants. I was hoping he was going in for a kiss, but maybe.

No, thankfully that didn't happen. Thank God that didn't happen. No, yeah, I went in for it. I went in for the kiss. But she wasn't, like, looking at me, so I kissed her on the neck. Okay. Okay. And what'd she do?

Did she get mad at that? Turned on? No, she was very neck. Okay. Okay. And what'd she do? Did she get mad at that? Turned on? No. She was very responsive. It was awesome. Like, she looked at me, she closed her eyes, and leaned in for the kiss. So I responded, and this is where it gets bad. Okay.

So as I'm leaning in for the kiss, I have bad allergies. And something just hit my nose. I couldn't stop it. And I sneezed in her mouth. Gross! You sneezed into her mouth.

That is so nasty. It was so embarrassing. You're right. That is probably one of the grossest date stories I've ever heard. I couldn't imagine that. How do you recover from that? You're like, uh. What did she do?

What did she do when you sneezed in her mouth? Oh, my God. She gave me the most, like, horrified look. Like, I just, like, if I just, like, spit in her mouth, I might as well have just spit in her mouth. Are you one of those, like, big man sneezers, too? Like, when my husband sneezes, it's loud and it's gross and there's spit that goes everywhere? Normally, yeah, I am a loud sneezer. However, this time, I was trying to hold it back.

So the volume wasn't as loud, but it was a little more liquidy. Oh, man. We were also eating ice cream, too. We were eating ice cream. That's so flimmy. That is disgusting. I We were eating ice cream. That's so phlegmy. That is disgusting. I was eating cookies and cream. Oh, okay.

I don't need to know the flavor of the ice cream that you spit into her mouth, basically. Cookies everywhere. So she obviously was shocked by this. Oh, my God. How did you react after that? I would have been mortified. I just immediately began to apologize. You know, I'm so sorry this doesn't happen.

Sorry, this and that. I'm so sorry. I just came to apologize. But was she cool? Because, like, she should be cool. No! You know, it took her, like, ten seconds to realize what had just happened. But she was kind of mortified.

And after that, when she came back to, she just kind of wanted to go home. Yeah, I would too. I just wanted to go home and turn on the hot shower and get in the fetal position and cry and clean my body off after that horrifying experience. So how did everything end with her then after this? Well, I took her home and, you know, it was a quiet car ride to say the least. And I walked her to her door. I attempted to try for one more.

Like, I leaned in. You tried to kiss her after that. That is a bold move to try to kiss her again after you sneezed in her mouth. Someone's got confidence. I mean, I had to give it a shot, you know. Take your lumps and walk away, man. Yeah, she pulled her head back and was like, well, good know. Take your lumps and walk away, man. Yeah, she pulled her head back

and was like, well, good night. Yeah, she probably has PTSD now thinking about getting kissed. You know, I think she shouldn't have

been that. I mean, you were obviously embarrassed. It was obviously a mistake. You really think that that's the reason she got so upset at you?

I mean, I would like to think that there's another reason for her not responding to my calls, but I sneezed in her mouth. It's the grossest thing

I've ever done to anyone. Absolutely, dude. I don't blame her for not calling you back. If a girl sneezed in my mouth, I'd probably be like, yeah, I just can't now.

I just feel too gross hanging out with you. So you haven't heard anything from her? No, and what sucks is that we were having such a great night up until then. Is she still on the dating website you met her?

No, her profile's gone. She really is done. She's like, I'm done dating. That's it. I'm done. Don't contact me. She moved away and became a monk. I know that she doesn't want to second date with me because of what happened, but that's why I'm calling you guys to kind of convince her that I'm an okay guy.

I'm a good guy. I'm worth a second chance. See if we can do that for you. We'll play a song, come back, call her, and get your second date update, okay? Thank you, babe. Hang on. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the Morning's Second Date Update. Let's recap a little bit, sort of relive history.

What have we done in the second date updates? What have we heard? We heard from a guy who messed himself in the park once. Yeah, the guy who spread his father's ashes on a date. There was the girl who had an accident in the backseat of a cab. There has been a lot of gross stuff that we've heard about on first dates. But this one might actually trump all of those.

No way! And it is disgusting. You think it's that bad? I really do. Bodily fluids in the mouth, Brooke. That's all I gotta say. None of that stuff involved any other person. It was just them doing stuff for themselves. This is a guy doing something to somebody else. If you missed the first part of the second date update, David is on the phone with us.

And David went to kiss the girl that he wants to call today at the end of their date and had to sneeze and sneezed directly into her mouth. And now that's why he thinks he's not getting a call back because it was just too disgusting. David, we're about to call Bridget and find out if that is, in fact, the reason. Do you have any last words? I just want her to, you know, I don't want her to think that I'm a bad person. I don't want such a beautiful thing that happened to get ruined over a sneeze.

I don't think that she would think you're a bad person necessarily, but I could see her not calling you back just because she... Or a gross person. A gross person. Yeah, she's probably not the most attractive you back just because she... Or a gross person. Probably not the most attractive thing you can do on a date, for sure. Alright, well I'm going to dial the phone right now, get her on the phone and get your second date update, okay? Thank you.

Hello? Hi, can I speak to Bridget, please? This is... Hey Bridget,get, please? This is... Hey, Bridget, how are you? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning. Oh, my God, shut up. No way. So you actually know who I am?

Yeah. Any idea why we might be calling you? If this is a second date update, I know exactly why you guys are calling me. I've heard you guys do this before. You know what? You hit the nail on the head, Bridget. I'm calling you for a second date update. You know who I'm calling about?

Well, it has to be about David because that's the only date I've been on in a while. Yes, it is about David. So I know he's listening. Oh, so I can't surprise you with the fact like he's on the other line. Damn it. You sound so happy that he's listening though. Like this is exciting for you.

I just can't believe you guys are calling me like this is ridiculous. Okay, so you already know the second date update, so you know David is on the line listening. I don't want to let you talk to him just yet, because I want to hear the date from your perspective. Do I have to relive it? Yes,

please. I would love you to. He obviously told us about your date and how he sneezed in your mouth. Oh my god. I didn't want to talk about it. I just want to hear it from your point of view. That's all. Do you mind talking to us for just a second about your date? I guess so, but I really don't want to. Was it really that bad?

Like, I just think that, you know, mistakes happen. He sneezed in my mouth. You're the only one not getting this. There's got to be somebody else that's like, well, you know, we're going to swap some bodily fluids anyway. Just chalk it up. In a nice way, not a sneezing way. And when you're prepared for it. Getting someone spit on your arm is gross enough, let alone in your mouth.

Okay, so before we talk about the sneeze and what was going on in your head. This girl came out just thinking about it. I want to know what was going on in your head when that happened, but I also want to know if you liked him before that point. The date was really nice. He was a really great guy, and everything was going really well up until then. He said such nice things about you. He thought that everything was fantastic and you were better than expected.

At that point before the sneeze, did you think there was going to be a second date? I thought maybe there could be a second date, but it was the first date I had ever been on from like online dating. So I mean, I wasn't even really sure what to expect anyways. Bad first example. Yeah, it was a bad first date off of an online dating website. I can see why you took your profile down because you told us that you're not on the site anymore. Yeah, I did remove it. So tell us about the sneeze then. What was going through your head when a dude sneezed in your mouth on a first date?

You keep saying it. I've never said that sentence before, but I want to say it every day from now on. It was as gross as it sounds. I mean, I wanted to, like, vomit. Alright, well, you know he's on the phone, so I'm gonna have to have him come on here and talk to you for a second. Oh, man, I don't even know if I want to talk

to him. Just talk to him. He's been trying to get a hold of you. He feels really bad about the sneezing in your mouth thing. At least let him apologize. Okay, fine. Put him apologize. Okay, fine. Put him on. Hello, Bridget. Poor David.

Hi, David. Listen, I know it was only one date, but we had a connection, and I don't want that to be ruined over some dumb sneeze. David, I'm going to stop you right there. I know we didn't talk about this on the date, but I was in a long-term relationship.

My boyfriend and I just recently broke up. I did one date online, and it didn't go nearly as well as I expected it to, and I'm just going to let you know I'm back with my boyfriend. What? No. So the sneeze in your mouth caused you to get back with your ex? It was that bad. I've listened to you guys before, and I've listened to Second Date Update,

and the nightmare stories are real, and it happened to me, and I'm back with my boyfriend. So are you getting back with your boyfriend because you want to be back with him, or you're just like, I don't want to be out there on the market having guys sneeze in my mouth left and right? I don't even want to imagine what another date would be like. I mean, I'm back with my boyfriend. He's an all right guy. I mean. So you're just settling with some guy because you're too scared to go on another date for fear of something bad happening? That sounds like such a bad plan. It's not exactly like that, but I mean, honestly, if something like that did happen to you,

I think it would scare you away from dating other people, too. No! Oh, my God! So basically, your ex-boyfriend, who is now your current boyfriend again, is comfortable, and you know him, and you know he's not going to sneeze in your mouth. Oh. I just think it sucks that, you know, you ran back to your boyfriend who you're're not even that seems like you don't seem too fond of him yeah the one because of one sneeze you know me sneezing in your mouth gross absolutely and I completely understand why you think that's gross

and I apologize a hundred times for it but that doesn't make me as a person like that's not me you you got to know each other and we had a chemistry together yeah Bridget. David is way deeper than the sneeze. There's much more to him than mucus. Oh, my God. at the end of the night. To me, that seems like it might have been a case of bad judgment, and I don't want to go out with someone who might have bad judgment. Oh, my God. Well, that leads me to my question, then.

Oh, don't do it. Bridget, would you like to go out on a second date with David? We will pay for it. Please? I mean, I think it'll be a great time. I'll take allergy medicine, whatever you want. David, you are a nice guy, and you may find love somewhere else,

but for me, it's just not going to happen. I'm in a relationship, and I'm comfortable. It's not I'm happy. I'm in a relationship, and it's eh. It's good. It's decent. Like a nice recliner. Thank you for your time Bridget

I appreciate you talking to us And thank you for listening to the second date updates Yeah keep them up guys Just don't ever call me again Well we won't because now you're in that awesome relationship So we can't And David I'm going to do you a favor right now

I don't do this very much What are you going to do for me I guarantee that there are some people out there who loved having their mouth sneezed in. And I'm asking them to text in 78592 right now. If you love having your mouth sneezed in, I will score you a date with David. Broken Jubal in the morning. Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer.

If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money Podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it.

For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups,

this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. $1.4 billion in NFL quarterback contracts. The untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history. I'm A.J. Stevens, Vice President of Client Strategy at Athletes First, introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast, the quarterback series. My co-host Brian Murphy,

Athletes First CEO, and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert, Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.