Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Pre-Loaded Spa Bonanza

Episode Date: February 10, 2022

One of our listeners swears he has a fool proof plan for dating...It involves A LOT of drinking before the date...And pretty bad hangovers...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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The OGs of uncensored motherhood are back and badder than ever. I'm Erica. And I'm Mila. And we're the hosts of the Good Moms Bad Choices podcast, brought to you by the Black Effect Podcast Network

every Wednesday. Yeah, we're moms, but not your mommy. Historically, men talk too much. And women have quietly listened. And all that stops here. If you like witty women, then this is your tribe.

Listen to the Good Moms Bad Choices podcast every Wednesday on the Black Effect Podcast Network, the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you go to find your podcast. I'm Emi Olea, host of the podcast Crumbs. For years, I had to rely on other people to tell me my story. And what I heard wasn't good. You really f***ed last night.

It felt like I lived most of my life in a blackout. I was trapped in addiction. You had to grab the lamp and smash it against the walls. And then I decided I wanted to tell my own story. Listen to Crumbs on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. When a guy's nervous for a first date, there are certain methods that he can use beforehand to help calm his nerves and boost his self-confidence. Okay. You know, like you can go hit the gym.

All right. That's a good one. Maybe get a haircut. That's nice, too. I mean, girls are the same. We're on the same list right now. You guys take artificial pills, too? No.

Oh, that's just a guy thing? No. Or you can do what I do and watch replays of MTV's Spring Break 2004 on VHS. Oh, yeah. Like a fine wine,

Daytona Beach back then ages well. Does it? Oh, yeah. But one of our listeners, Nate, has a different strategy that he uses to prepare for a big date and i've never

heard of this before i'm telling you there's no way it's better than daytona beach 2004 so color me skeptical but nate welcome to the show hey guys okay i'm i'm intrigued he piqued my interest what do you do before a date well hold on i need to know we'll get to the pre-date strategy in just a second. But first, why don't you tell us about the girl that you went out with? What's her name? Carolyn. Carolyn.

Carolyn Schmerlin. You know what I really care about, Nate, right now? Where did you meet Carolyn, though? We met online. What struck you about her? Well, we had a lot in common. She was pretty. You know, not beautiful, but pretty.

Oh, jeez. What's the difference? She's just like one notch under beautiful. Oh. That wasn't your... Your pickup line on Tinder? Yeah. But, yeah, we met.

We had a little conversation. Maybe he did say it to her. You sound like a real cat trick now so far, Nate. Why were you nervous for the date? I mean, Jeff said you did something to calm your nerves. Why were you nervous if she was only pretty? I always get nervous for first dates, whether they're beautiful, pretty, or cute. Okay, so cute's the lowest level of attractiveness.

No, I just heard the insult in that. Oh, no, cute, pretty, beautiful, and then hot. Okay, I can't. Yeah. Move forward. Let's just assume that this is a very attractive woman that you went out with. So tell us, we said you were nervous. What is your pre-date strategy to calm yourself?

Oh, I just like to pre-load myself. What does that mean? Not the night of. I know what it means, I think. What? Like, you know how people pre-party? Like, I don't pre-party. I got loaded the night before so that

I could be hungover on the day. So you could be hungover? Wait, is that because like, when you're hungover, you don't care about anything and you're at your absolute worst? Like, what is the... I don't understand the strategy here. Yeah, exactly. I don't get nervous about stuff when I'm hungover. I'm just, you know,

grinding my way through things. I just feel like I perform better. That's amazing. What? Is it? So the night before the date, you got wasted, and then you woke up the next day hungover, ready to go out. Exactly.

I mean, looking and I'm assuming smelling like hell. Well, I put on extra deodorant so that I wouldn't smell so bad. Oh, okay. probably the breath too usually not gonna work well it's all about how you feel brooke it's not about how you look or smell it's a feeling inside and so did it work did she notice the smell or notice your booming confidence walking in hungover well i also put on cologne as well as deodorant. Okay. Alcohol, deodorant, and cologne all mixed together. Oh, Nate. What was the first interaction like?

You walk into the restaurant. She's there. How does that go? We just introduced ourselves, hugged. I pulled out her chair. We sat down and ordered dinner. Okay. Did you get any vibe from her during that?

Was she noticing your aroma? No, I don't think she noticed anything. It was actually a flawless dinner. Great conversation, good food, tons in common. We both love dogs. Did you have more drinks to feel better, or did you guys just leave out the booze?

No, I kept it clean. And you don't... I kept drinking. Did you tell her? I mean, because, you know, obviously she's not calling you back. That's why you're on the phone with us. I mean know did you tell her i mean because you know obviously she's not calling you back that's why you're on the phone with us i mean did you tell her like oh i'm so hung over like maybe it was like the party vibe was a turnoff for her number one rule of getting pre-loaded never tell anyone you're doing it yeah they just have to figure it out from the sights and the smells. Are you dying?

She's so strange. But it sounds like the date went really well, according to you. That's amazing. How did it end? It ended with a kiss. It was lovely. I'm shocked you didn't throw up even on this date or anything. I don't throw up when I'm hungover.

I don't think people would want to date me. I don't do that. Puking when you're hungover makes you feel so much better. So why do you think you're not getting a call back after this then? Well, she had mentioned that she had a birthday coming up, and I wanted to do something for her. I didn't want to cross any lines or do anything too crazy since we just met. But I shopped around, and I got her a private spa package,

and I just emailed it to her. Wow. Private spa package. I mean, it sounds nice, but it's on the line of over to her. Wow. Private spa package. I mean, it sounds nice but it's on the line of over the top. Right.

Those are nice. Only because you're getting naked and getting rubbed down. Like, I just... But not by him. I know, but it's still like

that's the thought behind the spa always is. But you would still accept the gift. Oh, for sure. Even if I wasn't going to go out with him again,

I'd totally take it. So we all have our opinions on that gift. did carolyn think when you sent it to her she liked it she was excited that's good that's awesome very good okay so has she gone to the spa day yet she went but she didn't thank me for it you know and like i was worried that maybe something strange had happened but like the place had really good reviews didn't seem like one of those places that you hear about on the news i made an appointment at one of those spas once and then i i went and read the yelp reviews and the last one was from a granddaughter who sent her 85 year old grandpa there and it was i canceled yeah he had a great yeah so you're saying that she never thanked you at all yeah she never officially thanked me we texted back and forth

and she said yeah it was good but it just felt like the vibe was kind of off sounds like she was just accepting the present without any thought of maybe wanting to go out with you or maybe she was hoping it was one of those shady massage places and was disappointed it was so nice. Yeah, I'm really relaxed, but that's it. Well, let's find out. We're going to play a song. We'll come back.

We'll call Carolyn for you, and we'll try and get you a second date update. All right, Nate? All right, thanks. All right, hold on. Second date update. If you're just joining us, one of our listeners, Nate,

went out on a great date with a woman named Carolyn the other night. And the reason it went so well, according to him, is because he got preloaded, which apparently means getting trashed the night before. I've never heard of that, where you purposefully show up to a date hungover to try and ease the nerves. I've never heard of that. Because most people I know, including myself, are just complete garbage when they're hungover. I am worthless. I cancel dates when I'm hungover. Right?

Yeah. Well, there's a few single people on this show who maybe should give it a try. You're right, actually. I should follow through. That's true. I'm usually wasted on the date. Yeah. Exactly.

Just fast forward a little. Yeah, you gotta start much sooner. And I know this sounds a little bit strange, but it did work for Nate. In fact, he got a kiss at the end of the night. And afterwards, he sent Carolyn a private spa package as a birthday present. Doesn't a hangover kiss sound awful? I don't know. To me, it's like, a kiss is a kiss, Jose.

A hangover. I'll take any kiss, personally. Okay, I guess I would, too. But since then, Carolyn's been difficult to reach. And Nate, I never even asked you, did you get preloaded yesterday in preparation for this phone call? Number one rule of preloading, never tell anyone you're doing it. Oh, sorry, I forgot the rules. He's got a headache. I will say, you are pretty low energy right now.

Pretty chill. It doesn't sound nervous at all, though, so it's working. I forgot the rules. He's got a headache. I will say you are pretty low energy right now. Pretty chill. Yeah. He doesn't sound nervous at all, though. He doesn't. So it's working. I need to be hungover more. I know. Not drunk.

Hungover more. So the one thing I didn't get, Nate, I mean, you want to go out with her again or you're mad at her for not thanking you for the spa package? I want to go out with her again. I just think that her not thanking me might be an indication of her not liking me or something. Most girls would be ecstatic.

It's possible that she's preloading though to accept your date the second time around. She's maybe nervous now. You're perfect for each other. There's only one way to find out and that's by calling her number. Are you ready to do this? I hope she's slurring when. You ready to do this? Yes.

I hope she's slurring when we pick up. I hope so too. We're going to give it a shot. I'm dialing it right now. Here we go. Hello? Nope.

Yeah, no. Hey, is this Carolyn? Who is this? My name's Jeff from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. We're doing something called a second date update. What's this about? This is about somebody that you went on a date with recently.

He's a friend of our show, and afterwards he's been having a hard time getting a hold of you. His name's Nate. Oh, f*** me. That was weird. What? No. Whoa.

Now I want to hear what happened from your perspective. Wait, what was weird? Yeah, you're saying Nate was weird or the date was weird? I mean, I liked him. The date was great. We had an awesome time. We had a lot of fun. It's just after it got really strange.

Was it too much? I mean, he told us that he sent you that birthday gift, like the spa package. Was that like over the top for you? No, actually, I love that. Like, I thought it was really sweet that he remembered my birthday. And that means a lot to me that he was listening. Oh, okay. That's good then.

What is the part that made you say the F word? So I went to the spa and I was super excited to have this nice, luxurious spa day. And everything went amazing. And then I come out and they said, so can you pay? And I was like, what do you mean? This is a gift. And they handed me a bill of $250. Oh, no. So wait, did he only make you an appointment?

He didn't buy the package? They said it was booked, but he didn't pay. Oh, what? Wait a minute. He gifted you a bill? Oh, no. That's amazing. Happy birthday.

Yeah. What the f*** was that? Yeah. Did you have a nice time, though? It was nice that he got you in for a... No, Brooke! It's not nice. $200 worth?

When it's not free, it is not fun. I'm sorry. It's kind of funny. I'm sure... Maybe he didn't realize. Yeah. Are you saying you think that he didn't pay on purpose? I don't know what it was, but on top of that, I had to tip, so I wound up spending $300

on my phone for my birthday. Oh, no! You have to tip! I wouldn't call him back either. Well, you know what they say. When it seems too good Oh, no. You have to tell. I wouldn't call back either. Well, you know what they say. When it seems too good to be true. Yeah.

Usually is. Well, there's a chance that Nate doesn't even know that he didn't pay. Right. Did you tell him? I just left it alone at that point. It was too awkward. Awkward. Yeah.

Wow. Yeah. I wouldn't tell someone. What do you say? You owe me money? No. I would just be like, hey, you forgot to pay the fee. No.

That's weird. No. I would have said, hey hey, you forgot to pay the fee. No, that's weird. No, I would have said, hey, you may want to check your bank statement because they charged me for the spa day. I just want to make sure you didn't get double charged. Oh, that's smart. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah, that would have been a good idea. If we had done this for an awkward Tuesday, then it would have worked.

Now we can make the call. But we didn't, did we? No, we didn't. Well, here's the thing, Carolyn. I don't even know if Nate realizes that he didn't prepay for the massage. Yeah. I don't know. It just feels to me like something you should have handled.

Well, maybe we could ask him if he knew because he's actually on the other line listening and he wants to talk to you, Carolyn. The f*** he is. I like that you swear. You're sounding pretty stressed. You might need another massage soon. But no, I'm serious. Nate, you there? Yeah, I'm here.

Oh, God. Did you... Carolyn, I am so sorry. Oh, so you... You heard what she said about the spa? Yeah, I thought that I paid for it. I thought it was all taken care of clearly did you put your credit card information in yeah no i thought it was just automatic

what does that mean automatic like it goes into the universe like you just fake it and then you get and then it's paid for i mean that'd be nice to be like that way but how could you not think of something like that nay Nate, are you lying? Are you lying because you got caught? Or have you never booked a spa day before? Honestly, I have not, but I just messed that up. Like, I really did mean to pay for it. I mean, the thought was nice.

Just, I don't understand how you messed that one up. I mean, do you want to pay for it now? Oh. I mean, do you want to pay for it now? Oh. I mean, yeah. It doesn't sound like it. Did you know it was going to be like $300, Nate? No. I mean, do you want to split it?

Uh-oh. Can I pay an installment? You want to sign up for a financial package? Were you preloading when you booked this? Oh, that's a good question. That is a good question. I probably should have been preloading. Preloading?

What is preloading? Oh, yeah. We just learned, too. Yeah, Nate, you want to take this? Preloading's when you get real hammered the night before an important event so that you're hungover and just relaxed. Doesn't even sound right doesn't that sound lovely carolyn who needs a spa when you can preload why would you want to do that no the point is because if you're nervous it helps ease your nerves when you're hung over according to him

according to him having a glass of wine maybe yeah well yeah six glasses of wine, maybe. Well, yeah, six glasses of wine. Yeah, exactly. Where are we? Are we worried about preloading now? Are you getting your money back? I don't know. Good point. I feel like I want to preload, though. Well, do you want to hang out again?

Do you want to go on another date? You just asked me if I want to pay for half of my spa package. That was supposed to be a birthday gift. So is that a yes? Well, technically, it's half off a birthday package yeah if you guys go out again then nate can actually show you how to properly preload hey turn it into a date no you don't get someone a birthday gift and then ask if you want to cover half that's tacky it is a little tacky you asked before say hey i would love to buy you a spa package if you'd like to go halves on it

that's different than after right and nate if you'd like to go halves on it. That's different than after. Right. And Nate, if you couldn't afford the $300, man, that's fine. She wasn't asking for it. Like, why didn't you get her something else? Then just don't get it at all. Right.

Like a nice bouquet of flowers, I'm sure would have been super appreciated. Yeah. I mean, next time, you know. He's so pre-loved right now. Next year? Look, here's the thing. I don't know about who's going to pay for that massage, but the way that these second date updates work is that we offer to pay for the next date.

Yeah. So, Carolyn, with that being said, would you like to go out with Nate one more time? The bill will be on us. From the way he answered about splitting the spa package, that rubs me the wrong way. Yeah, but that's sober Nate talking. You need to go out with preloaded Nate. He's the charmer. And you still want the $150, don't you?

No, I don't even want his money at this point. I'm fine. I like Alexis. Whoa, a girl who doesn't want money? I think you should double think on that one. We can also split the tip on top of that, too. Well, duh. That was the point.

Aren't you already going to split the tip? She's going to split the actual. Nate, are you cheap or are you broke? I mean, either is fine. We just need to know. Hey, look, there's a lot going on right now. I just don't feel great because of last night. I knew it.

I knew it. Nate, what are you doing? Rule number one of preloading. You don't talk about what happened when you preloaded. I didn't preload. I just got baked. Much better. Way better. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

We're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will, too.

Be more you this year. And find them on Bumble. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners,

like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The OGs of uncensored motherhood are back and badder than ever. I'm Erica. And I'm Mila. podcasts. much. And women have quietly listened. And all that stops here. If you like witty women, then this is your tribe. Listen to the Good Moms Bad Choices podcast every Wednesday on the Black Effect Podcast Network, the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you go to find your

podcast.