Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Red Light Green Light

Episode Date: July 14, 2025

In today’s Second Date Update there was one moment that brought the evening to a SCREECHING HALT! Hear what it was in the podcast!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I'm Jeff Perlman. And I'm Rick Jervis. We're journalists and hosts of the podcast, Finding Sexy Sweat. At an internship in 1993, we roomed with Reggie Payne, aspiring reporter and rapper who went by Sexy Sweat. A couple of years ago, we set out to find him. But in 2020, Reggie fell into a coma after police pinned him down and he never woke up.

But then I see my son's not moving. So we started digging and uncovered city officials bent on protecting their own. Listen to Finding Sexy Sweat on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Summer's here and with the kids home and off to camp, it's easy for moms to get lost in the shuffle. On Good Moms Bad Choices, we're making space to center ourselves with joy, rest, and pleasure. Take the kids to camp. You know what? it was expensive. But I was also thinking, you have my kid. This is kind of priceless. Take her, feed her, make core memories.

I don't have to do anything. Main thing, I don't have to do anything. To hear this and more, listen to Good Moms Bad Choices from Black Effect Podcast Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Ding dong, Las Culturistas calling from YouTube. You heard that right. Las Culturistas now has its own YouTube channel.

Check out full episodes, iconic interviews, visual bits, and culture moments that'll change your life. All in stunning HD. So don't wait. Be sure to watch Las Culturistas on YouTube at youtube.com slash at las culturistas. Ding dong! Las Culturistas calling from YouTube. Do you remember Vine? It changed the internet forever and it vanished in its prime. I'm Benedict Townsend and this is Vine. Six seconds that changed the world. Hey guys, it's Janaye aka Cheeky's from Cheeky's and Chill Podcast. radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. That's why I'm sharing my ups and downs with you in real time and on the go. Listen to Jiggies and Chill on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

We got a brand new second date podcast for you today. Hey, it's Brooke and Jeffree in the morning. And I am so curious what people think of this woman's, we'll call it a life rule. Is that sound right? A relationship rule that she has? Yeah. It's definitely controversial. I mean, I can see the upside and the downside of it.

And I think she breaks her own rule. So, also interesting. That's a really good point. That's a really good point. You're gonna understand what we're talking about in just a second here, but we always love to highlight your comments. Leave them, let us know what you think of the show.

Thank you so much. And Alexis, what do you like today? Yeah, Karen Eskander said, I used to listen to you guys driving to my college classes every day, and four years later, now I have my four-month-old baby girl listening with me. That's so cute. You're probably teaching her all the words.

Yay! Her first world is gonna be second date update. Second date update. Your baby doesn't know a world without us. Yeah, that's right. I love that. That's so sweet. Thank you so much for being here and your brand new second date starts right now.

Second date update. What do you do if you're on a date with someone and in the middle you feel like it's going meh? Do you A. Order a round of shots to get the party going? Hey, that's a win-win, you know? Really depends on the establishment you're in. Yeah, fair. Yeah, this Denny's gonna get lit. Option B, fake like you're choking,

so she gives you the Heimlich, and at least you get some action out of it. A couple broken ribs, too. Yeah. You know, worth, you know a great story or see have a very honest one-on-one breakdown about how this date is actually going so far I think I take the Heimlich option over that one and I wonder if our listener Tina wishes she had done the same So let's talk to her Tina welcome to the show done the same. So let's talk to our Tina. Welcome to the show. Hi, thank you. Oh my God. That intro makes it sound like you told your date in the middle of it that it was going terribly. Yeah. Well, you sent us an email about this person's profile that you

met on hinge and I'm just going to read some of the things that you sent from his bio before we even get to your story. Okay. I'm interested. So according to this, his name is Josh. Uh huh. He's a specialist in education. His profile says he's dating with the intention of marriage Okay, sounds like a stable guy good career, and he's into skyscrapers and tropical fruits Not sure why we would need to know that information for this, but it's nice to be over informed sometimes So ever put a big apple on the big apple this guy would freak to be over informed sometimes. If they ever put a Big Apple on the Big Apple, this guy would freak out. Sounds like if there's a lull in your date, you just bring him to a tall building and

he's really excited. Wow! That's gotta be at least a hundred stories. Alright, now we have an idea about who Josh is. Clearly you met him on the app, so what did you two do for your date? We actually went to the zoo. The zoo? The zoo?

That's a cute date. Yeah, we got a couple of waffle cones and we just walked around, looked at animals and just talked a lot. All right, that sounds good. Well, he did, he talked a lot. Oh, okay. Does that have anything to do

with the thing I mentioned earlier about when the date's kind of going meh? Yes. Uh-oh. He's the one who asked me. Oh, he asked you how the date was going? Yes. Because I was being kind of quiet. And so maybe he wasn't sure if I was having fun. So he just asked like, is the date going okay? Was that the first question he asked you? Because it sounds like you're talking a lot. Yeah. What did you say?

I was like, do you want me to be honest? That's definitely a good response. I would have been like, no. And that would have made it fun, right? Like lie to me. Oh no. Anyways. What happened?

You were honest, I'm guessing. Yeah, because he said, yes, please. So I told him directly, well, honestly, you're talking a lot. Oh. Oh. Okay. Good feedback. Yeah. Next date. As a person who talks a lot, it's good to know that. Well, maybe but some people might take that differently. Did Josh seem offended by the critique? No, he seemed more confused with my as if he didn't know he was doing it. But he heard me out. And then he

tried to take constructive criticism. That's good. Oh, that's good. And he did a good job of it Oh, he did. Okay. Good. Yeah Okay, we hung out for another hour ended up grabbing drinks there because at the zoo you can like buy beer Yeah, and I didn't know that oh, you did they're offering alcohol in every kid's place these days parents are just like Like sloth shots Beer and wine typically The edge off it's not to turn up body shots at the zoo Maybe a little bit of beer a little bit of alcohol helped make the conversation go a little bit better

It actually did Just nervous right yeah, maybe you're just a strikingly beautiful woman, and he couldn't think straight And that's why he was talking so much in the beginning still annoying She's not denying that yeah, how did you two leave things at the very end? Well, at the very end, we just hugged and said goodbye, but while we were there, we worked on like an antelope puzzle and we did it together and it was fun. So it was cool. So the date actually got better then after you told him like he was talking too much? Yeah, it actually did. Like, I mean, he was more mindful. He asked me questions

He allowed me to see yeah You did an antelope puzzle, yeah, I mean that's a hot foreplay right there I mean Sorry, you said it just led to a hug at the very end. There was no kiss No, we text since then but they've all been pretty short. So I feel like now maybe he's overthinking things and he's taking what I said too seriously. Yeah, totally.

Oh, he talked too much before, and now he's not talking enough. Yeah. Right. I can see that. He's overcompensating. Or it could be something completely different that I didn't pick up on.

OK. But you're definitely feeling the vibe like he is not responding enough to ask you out again, obviously Yeah, because like I'm sending him flirty texts and flirty pics and he's not responding and that never happened Antelope skyscraper guava fruit What's wrong with this man? Yeah. You said it, Jeff. Follow me for my sexy emoji handbook coming out later on this winter.

Is that a papaya next to the space needle? Is it really an antelope emoji? No spoilers, no spoilers, okay? First we gotta finish this second date update. We'll call Josh, get some answers, and do it right after this. Hold on. second date update. We'll call Josh, get some answers, and do it right after this. Hold on. Second date update. I've learned two things so far today.

Okay. One. Shock, shock, shock, shock, shock, shock, shock, shock, everybody! Okay, it's so hot. If you can drink at the zoo. Okay. I can't believe you, of all people, didn't know that.

I didn't. I mean, I feel like you sniff out a beer wherever it is Frequenter but look for Brooke and Jeffrey's listeners zoo crawl coming We'll meet you by the baboons for Jaeger bombs It's like a responsible you have a beer Jeff Jeffery's listeners Passes out in the barren closure The second thing I've learned is with enough constructive criticism you can change a man

Cuz our listener Tina was honest on her date when Josh asked How do you think this is going with us and she was polite? Yeah, but said mmm. You'd probably be going better if you talked a little less. Yeah You know like that's the amazing thing. He's like oh, okay exactly their day actually went pretty good after that He didn't run off and cry near the snake cage like most guys would he actually stuck around had fun and cry near the snake cage like most guys would. He actually stuck around, had fun, they got drinks, did puzzles, so maybe there's another factor playing into all this

that we don't know about yet. So Tina, even though he has all these issues, why is it that you want us to reach out to him today? I mean, like, we had fun together and he's like a great guy. Totally. Well, the fact that he could adjust and take constructive criticism and be mature about it,

I think that's a big green flag. Well, and anybody who's a talker knows that if you get nervous, your mouth just doesn't shut up. Yeah. Okay, maybe let's take some of our own advice there. I'm just saying. I get it. Shut it, and we are gonna call Josh. What's your brain saying?

Okay, let's listen to ourselves. I'm dialing Josh's number right now. Hopefully he picks up. Here we go. Great, thank you guys. You're welcome. Yeah. Shh, sh up here we go. Great. Thank you guys. You're welcome Hello, hey, is this Josh Yeah Yeah. Who's this? Hey, Josh.

Hi, Josh. Hey, good morning. How many are there? What's going on? Yeah, there's a lot of us in here because we're a show. We're called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. Kind of like a morning zoo, if you will. I worked on a show called The Morning Zoo.

Oh, God, that was supposed to be a joke. I know. Isn't that sad? Yeah, you're on the radio right now, Josh. Uh, okay. Why? Why is because we're doing a segment called a second date update. Great news.

Was waiting for a response. It's okay. It's okay, he doesn't know what it is. That's all right. It's a segment we try to help out listeners who've gone out with someone and they're not getting a call back for a second meetup. So that's the case with you

and one of our listeners named Tina. Hello? Yeah. See, you're not letting the pause happen. You're doing it, Jeff. Just give him a beat. You know, he's processing a lot right now. Gotcha.

Don't force it, Jeff. I'll try it again. Tina. Yeah, Tina. I remember Tina. Okay, sorry. I know this is probably a lot. I'll just tell you that we spoke to Tina

before calling you, and she told us about your hangout. She mentioned the vibe between you may have changed after you asked if everything was going okay in the middle of the date. Yeah, that's true. What did you think about her response? Yeah, of her feedback. I mean, she used this analogy, she called it the stoplight rule.

Okay. Stoplight rule? When she was talking about how you were talking too much? Yeah, we're not familiar with that. What is the stoplight rule? Okay, well, she says that when you've been talking for 20 seconds, it goes from a green light to a yellow light, because you started to talk too long. 20 seconds?

And then, yeah, 20 seconds. And then she said, once you hit 40 seconds, it's a red light. What? Okay. Wow, so that's like a general rule you're saying. Yeah, she explained the whole thing to me. And she said that I sped past the red light

at least two to three times, which I, and I'm like, okay, I didn't know that like there was a traffic law for speaking, but. I mean, I didn't know that like there was a traffic law for speaking To get conversation going back and forth back and forth like that And this is all feedback you're getting on a first date Yeah, I mean we were having drinks and, I got a little bit of my story out and she was like, you still have the green but only for another seven or eight seconds. She's literally like, you're still allowed to talk.

I thought it was just one example and then we moved on from it. She's got one of those big speeding guns. She's blocking him. She's like, I'm counting. Keep going. You're not talking enough now. That would be difficult. Yeah. I like the rule, but it's stressful. Is that how it felt, Josh? Now that would be difficult. Yeah, I like the rule, but it's stressful Is that how it felt Josh? Yeah, I mean, I felt like I was like I'm like my like driving test Oh, yeah, when I was 16, I mean, it was like speed up now slow down I use your blinker merge and so I just kind of like lost all my confidence

It's understandable and you know what I'm gonna tell you parallel parked that paragraph. That was perfect. It's understandable. And you know what? I'm gonna tell you something here, Josh. I don't think Tina meant for it to come across that way. Uh oh. And I'm gonna let her tell that to you herself because she is on the other line right now waiting for me to hit my red light so I can stop talking. She's got her emergencies on her. And I'm gonna give her the green to go.

So Tina, go ahead. The intersection is yours. Josh, my God, like you make me sound so horrible. Oh, wow. Wait, wait. You've been listening this whole time? Yeah, and you're making me look pretty bad here. What?

Well, hold on, explain yourself. I don't think he was making you look bad. He was just saying it was overwhelming, Tina. It was a lot for him to think about. Oh my God. What? I'm sorry, but like where's the lie? He was just saying it was overwhelming Tina. It was a lot for him to think about What I'm sorry, but like where's the lie like I didn't say anything that was not true Okay, well to be honest when you were talking to the radio host I stopped listening after about like 20 seconds You gave him feedback and now he's giving you feedback because he has a tendency to drone on and on.

And he actually thanked me in the moment. And don't forget that. You thanked me. What do you have to say? What do you say to that? Did you not ask me to give you honest feedback? OK, I did. But I wasn't expecting you to give me a rollback.

Then accept accountability. Accept robot. Accept accountability. Accept accountability. Accept accountability. Like it's not your fault you're a long talker. You just acknowledge it and the goodness is you're trying to get better and like I see the potential in you and it's so great. I don't feel.

I don't think it's a compliment you think it is to tell people you see potential in them. You actually, it's like, you like the person for how they are now. Well Brooke, I see potential in them. You like the person for how they are now. I see potential in you in the future one day. I didn't mean it like that. I meant it like he's improving every second and he needs me. Oh, because like, clearly because now it's obvious like he hasn't learned his lesson because he is still talking And I also feel like the hosts are not even paying full attention Like I'm sure they are because you're being rude and insensitive like so there take that advice

rude and insensitive like so there take that advice. I'm always open for getting better, Josh, but if it doesn't come with a helpful analogy and a short one, then it's kind of lost on me. Like actually the stoplight thing has already been taken. So you need to find another sort of like commuter thing. Some bicycle lanes, maritime law kind of compliment speed bumps bumps that would be helpful in a relationship relationships are not supposed to be this hard especially but this isn't hard it's a little confusing

I told you what it was I explained to you how it works and I'm pointing out when you go too long so like what's so hard about that it feels like one of those roundabouts where you don't know what the third exit yeah I'm gonna give everybody the red light here okay and I'm just gonna tell you a little fun fact about me is that I am not I am not the best talker either but I think

something we can all agree on even Brooke will back me on this okay is everybody all of us here and every person on earth has areas in their speech they could personally improve on What does that have to do with him thinking she was rude I'm just saying we all have flaws Areas in our speech. Yes, I think the 22nd rule is real No more advice is needed and I should just ask would you care to both improve each other's lives immensely By going out with one another one more time and we'll pay for it. I mean I would do it again And do it for charity reasons That's a big yes from Tina

To work and change you over the next few years Josh. What do you say? Will you be her project? Satan under like 20 words. I'm gonna give you a yellow light on this. Yeah, I don't think so. I don't want to feel like I'm going to traffic court every day for the rest of my life. So that's a big no from me. It's interesting. Most people think traffic court is fun. Well, didn't work out Tina. It's his loss.

It's his loss, yeah. He's lost so much for someone who doesn't like talking. Yeah, I know. Look, it's Jeffrey in the morning. Oh, red light, green light. It's fatal in Squid Game and apparently in the dating world too. How did we not make that connection earlier? I don't know.

That's true. That's funny. Probably should have. But maybe we should use it on this show. As soon as Brooke starts telling one of her pathetic, ugly duckling childhood stories, where she tried to show skin to the mailman, and even he wouldn't pay any attention to her. Alexis you're gonna start holding up colored cards and when it flashes yellow means time to start wrapping the story

up. I get red carded and you just monologued for two minutes straight. Yellow, yellow, yellow. A little too much. We get it. We know who needs a red card. He said the left one was a little wonky and he wasn't interested. We've heard the story. He's always interested, Jeff. It doesn't matter how wonky things are. But if you need help in your dating life, like Brooke did back in her teenage years, you can always email the show. We'll call that person who's not calling you back. And go check out all of our second day podcasts.

They're up online wherever you get yours, at Brooke and Jeffrey. I'm Jeff Perlman. And I'm Rick Jervis. We're journalists and hosts of the podcast Finding Sexy Sweat. At an internship in 1993, we roomed with Reggie Payne, aspiring reporter and rapper who went by Sexy Sweat. A couple of years ago, we set out to find him.

But in 2020, Reggie fell into a coma after police pinned him down, and he never woke up. But then I see, my son's not moving. So we started digging and uncovered city officials bent on protecting their own. Listen to Finding Sexy Sweat on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Summer's here and with the kids home and off to camp, it's easy for moms to get lost in the shuffle. On Good Moms Bad Choices, we're making space to center ourselves with joy, rest, and pleasure. Take the kids to camp.

You know what? It was expensive. But I was also thinking, you have my kid. This is kind of priceless. Take her, feed her, make core memories. I don't have to do anything. Main thing, I don't have to do anything. To hear this and more, listen to Good Moms Bad Choices from Black Effect Podcast Network

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Ding dong! Las Culturistas calling from YouTube. You heard that right. Las Culturistas now has its own YouTube channel. Check out full episodes, iconic interviews, visual bits, and culture moments that will change your life, all in stunning HD. So don't wait. Be sure to watch Las Culturistas on YouTube at youtube.com slash at Las Culturistas.

Ding dong, Las Culturistas calling from YouTube. YouTube. Do you remember Vine? It changed the internet forever, and it vanished in its prime. I'm Benedict Townsend, and this is Vine, Six Seconds That Changed the World, and it vanished in its prime. I'm Benedict Townsend, and this is Vine, six seconds that changed the world. The untold story of genius, betrayal, and the app that died so that TikTok could thrive.

From overnight stars to the fall that no one saw coming, we're breaking down what made Vine iconic. Listen to Vine on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. At the end of the day, I am human, and that's why I'm sharing my ups and downs with you in real time and on the go. Listen to Jiggy's and Chill on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.