Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Smells Like Tween Spirit

Episode Date: November 24, 2023

One of our listeners claims he was having a great date with a beautiful woman… Until it was ruined by a group of 13-year olds!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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$1.4 billion in NFL quarterback contracts. The untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history. I'm AJ Stevens, Vice President of Client Strategy at Athletes First. Introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast, the quarterback series. My co-host Brian Murphy, Athletes First CEO, and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert, Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Second Date Update. Brooke, how many horrible dates did you have to go on before you finally found your husband? Actually, don't answer that because I don't want to hear about the 3,024 of them. All the fails.

I would say I had some good ones too. Actually, we just got 10 texts in to 78592 saying the same thing. Please don't ask Brooke about her horrible dating life. So, I'm glad that we have someone else on the phone right now to share their bad dating stories with us. His name is James, and in his email, he said he's been on so many awful dates,

it was just refreshing to finally meet a woman who he described as somewhat normal. So James, welcome to the show, man. Hey, thanks for having me. I appreciate it. Everyone's thinking, where did you find someone somewhat normal? Now, James, a lot of people, when they write to us, they focus on the date that they just had. Yeah. But I thought it was kind of funny that you mentioned a few of the bad experiences that you had before this. Oh, you went into detail about it?

One that you said was you got invited by a girl to her church picnic? That is correct. She originally told me it was if I wanted to see an outdoor play. And I thought, you know, like Shakespeare in the Park kind of deal or something like that. Yeah. And that wasn't the case at all because I get there and she's dressed like the devil. Oh, whoa. Her face is painted red.

Oh, no. So not like a sexy devil like you were hoping for. No. Yeah. Not at all. She is screaming, fire and brimstone, everyone's going to hell. Oh, okay. That's kind of hot.

So that's a look at dating. I can use that. We role play it. Okay. Yeah. Save that costume for later. Yeah, send me to heck. What was the other one that you mentioned?

Something about mini golf? Yeah, I went on a date with a girl with mini golf. I don't know if she had a medical problem or what, but she couldn't stop farting. Sweet girl. And mini golf, if there's not a lot of people, can be really quiet. Yeah, the windmill isn't that loud, though. She was trying to time it with the putter.

She's screaming for. I feel her so bad. So there was a lot of room for improvement, you're saying. Tell us about the good date that you finally had. Who was that with? Her name is Vicky, and I met her online. Her profile picture was pretty. I mean, I don't want to sound shallow here, but.

That's what dating online is set up for, right? Yeah, exactly. And she totally looks like her picture. We just clicked and we sent multiple messages back and forth. I mean, with your history, were you thinking like, oh, my God, there's no way this sounds too good to be true. Are you a devil fart monster? Yeah. I mean, you've got to put yourself out there.

Yeah. No, totally. So what did you and Vicky do for your date? We ended up going to a barcade. I don't know if you guys are familiar with that. Yeah. It's kind of like a bar. Oh, yeah.

Always wanted to go on a date to one of these. No, it's really fun. They have like old school Atari games or any old arcade game or anything like that. So how was the arcade with Vicky? Did you guys have a good time? Yeah, dude. There's like this super awesome nostalgia factor going on. And this was, I guess, when going over the date, the only like hiccup is I came across my all-time favorite video game, which is the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Yes! I want to go on a date with you. I found a place like that by my house and my son is obsessed with it now. So fun, dude. It is such a good game. Yeah, dude. I'd kill it, Raphael. Oh, Raphael. Interesting choice. Why is that a bad moment in your date, though?

Because the problem is, once I found it, I wanted to play it. But I saw it across the room and as we were getting closer to it, I'm hyping it up. I'm like, you're going to love playing this game. A group of tweenagers, they swooped in and started playing before I could get to it. Oh, no. Oh, this is an all-ages arcade. Okay.

Yeah. Yeah, it's one of those places where I guess kids can get in there or stay in there until 9 p.m. or something. Okay. So, again, why did that ruin your date? You didn't get to play the game? Well, I did this thing where I stood awkwardly behind him thinking

that would, like, weird them out. Oh, no. Just super passive-aggressive, yeah. Exactly. You guys didn't go off and play something else?

You're just standing there with your date as these teenagers play? Yeah, we're sipping beers and we're talking, but then, like, the one kid just, like, looks over his shoulder

and is like, shut up. Oh. Oh. That's probably not a great look in front of your day that's what you get old man i'm not gonna back off and let these kids win because this is my game i can like show off okay this is the hill that you're choosing to die yes it's the teenage mutant ninja turtle mountain exactly and it was like you know what what? Let's drift on. So then we left the barcade and we're on just down the street to another bar. And she's like, I got to wrap it up. And I'm like, dude, it's only 830.

And she was like, I got to get up early in the morning. And it felt like an excuse to you. Dude. A little bit. You think she really wanted to play Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2? She's like, that's it. If we're not going to play, I'm going home. Exactly. I mean, she could have been turned off

a little bit because I was being very forceful and very adamant about like, let's play this specific game. And then the kids being jerks maybe killed the vibe. Kids always kill the vibe. I'm just going to let you know. Go to a 21 plus next time. But I just need to know

if that was it. Just say that was it. I will definitely make sure date number two will have no children at all. Let's call her and ask. We'll see if that's the reason. We'll play a song, come back, call Vicky for you and try and get your second date update, okay? That'd be awesome.

Alright, hold on, man. Second date update, okay? That would be awesome. All right, hold on, man. Second date update. A great TV show, great theme song, and an even better arcade game. For sure. And our guy James just wanted to show his date how Raphael could do some serious damage with his front flips. But he never got that chance. And even worse than losing the chance to play the game is he actually lost his date, Vicky. Now, it seems like she may have used an excuse to get out of there a little bit early, but we're not sure.

And James thinks it might have been because he got into a verbal spat with some unruly tweens who were hogging the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle machine. And I just have to ask you, James, what's the worst thing that you said to them when you were in an argument? It was something really generic because you're arguing with kids. So you don't want to say something like, I tagged your mom and your dad was watching. What? That just came to you?

Yeah. Concerned. It's like you've been playing this fight over and over in your head. Exactly. So it was something like, I think I hear your mom calling. You probably should have gone with that first diss. Yeah, I mean, that would be a turn off for me.

I never should have gotten into it with him at all. At least you know that. I mean, it's that and that you pick Raphael out of all of them. I was a Donatello guy, but I'm all Michelangelo. Anybody Leonardo in the group i don't even know i yeah i don't feel like we should discuss any more teenager ninja turtle

character preferences your personality i just think we should call vicky and see what she has to say maybe she's really picky about the characters too maybe maybe she's a splinter gal. Maybe. Whoa, that's a curveball. Exactly. A zaddy. They're called masters. The only way is to call her and ask. So let's just do this. Here we go. I'm going to dial her number right now. Hello?

Hey, is this Vicky? This is Vicki. Hey, Vicki, my name is Jeff from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. Okay. Hi. Hi, Vicki. The whole show is here. Hey.

How you doing? I'm good. Is there a reason you're calling? Funny you should ask. Yeah. Are you familiar with our show at all? Yeah, I definitely listen. Cool. I'm just a little nervous right now. Okay. Well, then you might be familiar with the second date updates.

Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay. Oh, my God. Your nervous laugh is really cute, though, Vicky. Good job. Brooke, stop. No, my God. Your nervous laugh is really cute, though, Vicki. Good job. Brooke, stop. No, I just think it's cute. Well, we're calling, obviously, because one of our listeners went out with you recently, and he's been having a hard time reaching you over the past week. Remember James?

Oh, yeah. Oh, man. Oh, gosh. Okay. All right. It wasn't as fun for you as it was for James, it sounds like. I mean, I don't know how much he's told you, so I don't want to, like, you know. Okay.

Well, what we do know is you guys went to a barcade, had some drinks. We did. Yeah. We know that he was really interested in you. He thought you were cute, had great hair, fun personality. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I mean, did you think he was really interested in you. He thought you were cute, had great hair, fun personality. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. I mean, did you think he was cute? Yeah, I definitely thought he was cute. Okay. We were having a fun time. There was just kind of like a moment that was a little bit of a turning point for me. Does that have anything to do with a group of superheroes? Teenagers, maybe turtles, maybe turtles reptilian all right so you know a little bit about it what he told us is that there were some kids hogging the teenage mutant ninja turtle machine and so it kind of

led to exchanged words but you guys passed and just went somewhere else but i mean to be fair we told him that that's like i mean for alexis I anyway, it'd be a pretty big red flag if he was arguing with teenagers. Yeah. Yeah. Not a good look. There is a little bit more to the story. Oh, really? What do you mean?

Like he did more than exchange words with them? I mean, I think he thinks I don't know about this part, but yeah, like he, so he went to the bathroom before we were going to leave and he came out and like had a cut on his lip. He looks kind of like bruised up and stuff. Like he had something had happened and he, something had happened in the bathroom. Yeah. Oh God.

Dude. Sometimes those paper towel dispensers, I get in fights with those things all the time. They shoot them out real quick. Yeah. I mean, that's what he said he said he like flipped and accidentally bumped his face on the stall and i was like are you that drunk first of all dang that's a huh i mean they don't i will say a lot of arcades and not very clean bathrooms so maybe it was a slippery floor well what he doesn't know is, like, right before that, a few minutes before he came out, some of the middle schoolers came up to me who were playing the ninja game.

And they said, hey, tell your boyfriend if he mouths off again, we're going to beat his ass worse than we just did. What? They beat him up in the bathroom i think so because like in the moment i was like all right whatever and then when i saw him i was like oh my god he just got beat up by a kid oh my god but you can't blame him for that like what is he supposed to do hit him back yeah you beat the crap out of those kids like did you bring it up to him no i was just like i'm done this is definitely a red flag oh yeah are you more turned off that he fought or that he lost i mean just the fact that the whole thing happened. Just he's the adult in the situation.

Then you're going to, like, fight with some middle schoolers in the bathroom. And then you're going to lie about it. Well, that's pretty embarrassing to admit. I mean, yeah. All right, so look, here's what we know. We know that there was obviously some verbal stuff with the kids at the arcade. But you're saying you didn't actually see anything yourself, Vicky. So we need

to go right to the source here and just ask james you throw hands with some middle schoolers or what normal questions yeah yeah oh no oh yeah james uh well i i didn't know they talked to you vicky i oh my god oh god it actually happened oh Okay, well, first off, there were like seven of them, okay? No, no. Well, okay. Listen, listen. There were three of them, and one of them was on crutches, so don't. Maybe that's why he got hit with a crutch.

It's a melee weapon. He was swinging with it. Oh, my God. Melee. James, how did that happen? how did that happen in the bathroom i mean they have horrible mouths that's what happened so i had to defend myself so wait did you ask them to fight you in the bathroom no i went into the restroom to do the normal things just leave myself and then all of a sudden i get sucker punched from behind with a clutch whoa that's when they start running their mouths and i square up and i swear it was a fight or flight moment and here's the problem is i swung on one of them and i missed

oh okay so you actually tried to throw a punch at one of these kids? This is not making it better. Like you're telling it in more detail does not make it better. They were attacking me. I was defending myself and I was defending you. No, you weren't. You were not defending me. I was defending your honor.

I was defending your honor because these kids were saying you had small boobs. I was like, you don't need to say that. Oh, middle school. No, they didn't. Oh, God. And what's wrong with small boobs? There's nothing. Thank you, everyone.

That's like the best thing you can say. You guys are laughing and thinking this isn't serious, but it was really serious. He had me in a headlock. I was losing consciousness, and he was like, this is about to go a headlock. I was losing consciousness. And he was like, this is about to go night-night. I'm like, what is this? How do they get in a headlock if they're shorter than you? This is why parents stop putting their kids in taekwondo.

This is what happens. Are you exaggerating, James? Like, it feels like this story just keeps getting more out of control. If you had been there like I was, it was a desperate situation. And I was in a point where I was willing to do anything I could to get out of it. Yeah. It can be scary to be provoked. I just think.

I mean, if you have seven kids running around you, no matter how big they are, it's like you're outnumbered. There was only three, but yeah. I'm just hoping now that we've heard the full story, can you hear where he's coming from? He was defending your honor, defending himself himself and maybe he deserves a second chance We'd like to pay for another date with James And for the record for the record nobody here thinks that you. No, we think small is fine. I support it. I said just the right size. But small is good. No, I'm not interested.

This thing is even worse than it was when I heard from the kids. Oh, man. This is ridiculous, man. I get beat up by a mob of thugs, and I'm not getting a second date out of it. James, this story just keeps getting me. One of the kids was on crutches. Have you not seen Return of the Jedi? You could spin that thing around and around.

You should have gone Raphael on him though, bro. Oh, there we go. Bust out the nunchucks. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. I think we all can agree, violence is never the answer. Unless the question is

who's hogging the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle arcade game. Then I'll beat all you kids up! That's right. No, the unwritten rule is you have free reign to swing on children. No, you don't! You tell me the rules. I don't know them. Listen, I will give. It can be scary

to be, you know... Jumped? Well, yeah. One time in the park, I stopped a group of eighth graders from fighting. Oh. Okay. So you were able to stop them? With a baby on my hip. Oh, okay.

So I don't know. I mean, there's probably easier ways that he could have de-escalated the issue. Okay. They were kind of frightening. Okay. Kind of. The thing is, you know that there's some woman out there listening who really feels bad for james like it's the mother of the children no i'm just i guarantee that we're gonna get texts into 78592 from some women saying he was the victim and he

was fully in his right to defend himself and he's actually a hero the kids were just trying to play their video game. If he would have not, I know, but if he wouldn't have started the whole thing to begin with. He started it. Look who's the kid now, bro. He was giving them names, you know? It's a good reminder to all of our listeners, hey, if you're going out on a date tonight, don't beat up any kids.

No, don't do it. Your instincts might tell you to do it, but you have to resist. Anyway, remember, if you want to get a second date update or other awesome dating advice, you can always email the show. We'll call the person who isn't calling you back. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble.

More of you shamelessly sending playlists especially that one filled with show tunes more of you finding gemini is because you know you always like them more of you dating with intention because you know what you want and you know what we love that for you someone else will too be more you this year and find them on bumble john stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics,

entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. 1.4 billion dollars in NFL quarterback contracts. The untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history. I'm AJ Stevens, vice president of client strategy at Athletes First.

Introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast, the quarterback series. My co-host Brian Murphy, Athletes First CEO, and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert, Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.