Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: The Situationship

Episode Date: January 27, 2023

The woman in today’s Second Date is stuck somewhere between a casual courtship and exclusively non-exclusive. So we’re gonna try to clear things up for her!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow the Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. Second Date Update. How many times have we heard the story,

I don't think that girl would have ever spoken to me, but I had a puppy with me in the park and next thing you know i've got 15 different phone numbers yeah checks out sure some were from 80 year olds and a couple 14 year olds but there's still phone numbers there's a few few ones who haven't been through menopause quite yet. And those are the ones that I want to go out with. Sweet. We've all heard that story before. Okay, is that not the story we're going to hear today? What we haven't heard is the girl with the dogs in the park

and how that leads to a life of romance. I mean, it works exactly the same. It posays at the dog park. I don't know if people with the dog are talking to a girl. And I was like, how have I seen Haze more often than I've seen Andy? Are you talking to us? Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.

I was talking to somebody else. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I thought I was with you, but I must have did not. Not on you. Not on you. You're good. You're good.

Lisa, you're on the show now. Were you talking to your puppy? And we were. Yes, I was talking to my puppy. I was just venting. I was just venting. We were talking about you because apparently dogs were involved in your first date. Is that right?

Yes. Well, dogs are always involved in my life. But yes, specifically my first date as well. Okay. So you're like a dog mom. Well, yes. So I'm a dog mom, but I'm a dog mom and I love my dog so much that I ended up running my own pet business.

That's cool. You have your own business doing it all. You're doing good work in the world. Thank you. Is that how you met the person you went out with? No. So I met him online. He didn't really know like what I did necessarily, but he knew that I was an animal lover.

Okay. And does he have a name? Yeah. His name is Nathan. Okay. And I was supposed to go meet up with him a couple of days ago, and I was running late. So I was like, let me just ask him if he wants to come and walk the dogs with me. Oh, mix in business and pleasure, I see.

Do you want to come with me to my work? Who doesn't want to walk dogs? Like, you're outside, you're enjoying the weather, and you're hanging out with animals. I would love it. That's the only thing that would probably get me on a walk is give me some dogs and let them guide me. How did it go? Were you able to have a fun time with them, make it romantic? Yeah, it was great.

We met up. We took the dogs around. It was really, really good. And he asked me, he's like, do you have your own dog? And I said, yes, of course I have my own dog. And he goes, well, we should walk him too. And I told him that his name was Barney. That's a cute name.

Oh, nice. It's short for Barnacle, actually, because he's kind of old and crusty. Oh, Barnacle. Barnacle. Did you, like, stop by your apartment or something and pick up Barney? Yes, we ended up walking Barney.

And after we had walked, like, four different dogs. So, you know, I was like, this guy is willing to walk with me for these many hours. You know, it was going good. And the conversation was great. And we went to go drop off Barney back at home. And we kissed on my front door. Oh, you kissed?

I know. Right in front of Barney? I thought you were going to list the body parts. You think that's inappropriate on the first date in front of the kid? Yeah, you don't want to do it in front of your children. I think Barney approved. I think Barney approved. Did you invite him up or was the kiss the end of the night?

It doesn't have to go any farther than that. It drops everything? How deep do you want this to go? So I invite him up and then he ends up spending the night. Oh, you did? Yeah. Okay. Come on.

All right. The morning wasn't awkward at all. Like, everything went super smooth, except the only awkward thing about it was that Barney slept in the baddie because he always sleeps with me. But he didn't seem to mind. Okay. Well, I mean, he knew what he was getting into. He walked dogs with you for hours.

Yeah. I mean, you obviously made a good connection because it's not even like you guys were drinking. It wasn't like some, like was like it was all genuine. Yeah, that sounds great. So how did you two leave it that day? So he was getting ready to go that next morning. And I told him I was like, well, I want to be vulnerable with you. And I said, I like you.

And I told him, you know, I don't want to meet anyone else new online. Like I did, but not take it too seriously. Whoa. Wait, is this the talk? Kind of. It's like a free talk. I feel like it's important to let people know what page you're on and for them to let you know what page they're on. And that's how things work.

So I asked him, I said, are you okay if we're in a situation-ship? A what? A situation-ship. What's that that that's like you're not quite in a relationship it could either be a new relationship or you know those people that date for 10 years but never get married that's also like considered a situation right like not meeting new people but like not boyfriend girlfriend exactly not and just concentrating on each other though So exactly like you were before. Absolutely nothing different. You get in trouble if you're calling the app, which sucks. That's interesting. What did he say? He seemed a little surprised by it, but not in a bad way.

And he kind of laughed, and he agreed with it. Oh, that's cute. Well, and I bet it was refreshing for him. I mean, I would imagine finally someone who is forthright with how they feel, what they want want here's my boundaries yeah don't you think that's nice as a guy i maybe it could have waited a day or two i mean if it didn't go so well i don't think that i would have brought that up but like it was just so natural and like you guys said like you weren't drinking we weren't doing anything crazy so like

all the feelings that i got from him were very genuine and i was just i just thought it was a great time. Okay, so now you're officially in a situationship with Nathan. Who won't call you back? Is that what's going on? That's kind of how they work. It's a unique situation. Is it the end of the situationship?

Well, I hope not because it just started. Okay. So it can't end because it didn't begin. So you're having trouble keeping the situationship going. I mean, there's been like a couple of times where I try to reach out to him, you know, like try to set up a little date to hang out and like nothing too serious, just like a coffee date or something.

Or I even asked him if he wanted to come over and hang out with Barney again. And he's just kind of like either always busy or... This is definitely a situation that we're in now, but... Are we in a situation? No ship with it. Just a situation. We're going to try and ship it though

when we called nathan coming up next i am shipping them for sure we're gonna ship you too after we play a song come back and get your second date update second date update and it's weird we talk about so many different dating terms on this show and i haven't heard of the one that bro and Jose both apparently knew called Situationship. Yes. Which Brooke is trying to attempt with her husband unsuccessfully at the moment. I don't want to break up with him. Yeah, exactly.

That's where you're not fully exclusive, but you're also not actively trying to meet new people. Yeah. And that's what happened on Lisa's date the other day with a guy who ended up spending the night after they walked dogs together, woke up the next morning and she said, will you be in a situation ship with me? And he was all on board for it. Or so he said. At least, yeah. I mean, to his face. Those were his words.

His actions have been a lot different than that because he is not scheduling that second meetup. So we're going to call him and find out why he isn't more serious about this situation ship. Not too serious about it. The average amount of seriousness that goes into situations. Right, Lisa? Right. Right.

Okay. Are you feeling nervous about this? Because, I mean, you obviously really like this guy. I mean, the only thing that I'm getting nervous about is maybe I brought up the situation ship a little bit too early. Well, maybe we can unscare him off. Yeah. If that is the case. By getting a call from a radio station.

We're cool. Yeah. Who knows? Maybe after this call is over we'll be considered the situation ship crusaders. That doesn't sound cool at all. I'm putting in the petition to change the show name from Brooke and Jeffrey to the situation ship crusaders. That doesn't sound cool at all. I'm putting in the petition to change the show name from Brooke and Jeffrey to the Situationship Crusaders.

I'm going to deny that motion. Okay. Fine. We'll stick with Brooke and Jeffrey. Fine. Let's go. It's all Nathan. See what he has to say. Hello? Hey, is this Nathan? Yeah, this is Nathan. Sorry, did we just catch you waking up or something?

No, I just get a lot of calls from numbers I don't have. You're annoyed. We're not a solicitor. Yeah, we hate those people too. Don't worry, bro. Well, we're not not solicitors in a way. No, we know him. We're situationers. Yeah. We're soliciting on behalf of one of our listeners named Lisa that you went out on a date with

and are still seeing? Not seeing, I don't think. Well, want to still see? Yeah. No, Lisa, we're seeing each other. Oh, you are seeing. Okay. So she reached out to us for this thing called a second date update.

That's what we're doing right now. Because she's a little bit confused about why after your first date, there hasn't been a second one. She says you've responded to texts. It's just like, doesn't seem like you're super stoked to see her again. No, I do like Lisa a lot. Like, she's awesome. A lot. Okay.

Wow. Okay, so you, I mean, the situationship is on your side. She told us at the end of your first day, you guys set up a situationship. And she told us that she might have been worried that she rushed into it. She may have brought it up a little bit too soon.

It scared you off. Or we told her she may have brought it up too soon, but yeah. No, yeah, I mean, I think situationships are awesome. Okay. So you aren't actively pursuing anyone else and you're concentrating on dating lisa right now well i wouldn't exactly say that but i am pursuing lisa we are in a situation well she said that she's been trying to make plans with you but you're always busy or something well i mean you know i would have gone out with her last week but like she said that she could only do Friday.

And I was actually kind of already had plans with someone a date on Friday. If you're in a situation ship, you don't go out on other dates, right? Isn't that how I understand it? Well, no, I mean, we are in a situation ship. It's like, I basically can't go out and meet anyone new, but there are like a few other girls I've already been seeing and chatting with. So like that should be okay, you know? I think you guys made different definitions.

Yeah. You're kind of cheating on a situation ship. You can't cheat because it's not a relationship. So Alexis is on your side, bro. So you're in a situation ship with Lisa, but what are the other girls then? You know, I'm actually like in, like there's like four situation ships at the moment. You're in four situation ships all at the same time? Is that allowed? I don't think that's a thing.

Unless you talk about an open situation ship, but I don't think you have that. An open situation ship. She just said like you can't go out and meet anyone new. And, like, that's all we talked about. So you're holding on to that word. This is one of those, like, semantics things. Yeah, that's the word, semantics. I mean, you haven't told her about the other four women,

so you obviously know it would upset her. I mean, for all I know, she could be in several other situations. Okay, that's what cheaters always say. No, you don't have to tell them because it's a situation. Yeah, but you can't date like five people at the same time and say you're all in a situation with all of them. We're all sounding very

confused about it, but Nathan seems very sure of himself that this is okay. To me, it's like that's the difference between a relationship and a situation. So you never cheat in a relationship, though. You're just saying in this situation, it's okay. To me, it's like, that's the difference between a relationship and a situation ship. So you would never cheat in a relationship, though. You're just saying in this situation, it's okay. Yeah, I mean, it's actually a pretty

great situation because, I mean, I get this free pass to go out and date and hook up with a bunch of other girls and, like, no commitment to anyone. So you're single. So you're getting with, like, Brenda and Sally and Ashley and Lisa and they're all

cool with it. It's like we just pulled all the names out of 1950. I know. Are we a duo? I'm just saying, why am I not in a relationship? This sounds great. No, it's not a relationship. Oh, a situation ship. No, that's not how it works.

That's not how Lisaisa thinks it works i can guarantee it focus on one another may not be too serious maybe lisa is totally on the same page as nathan on in this yeah find out let's let's ask her because nathan i need to let you know that lisa is on the other line listening she actually has been this whole time i am listening and you're disgusting we are not in an open situation-ship. Oh, it's not an open one? Both of you, it wasn't open. I don't think that you understand what the definition of a situation-ship is.

No, you told me I wasn't supposed to meet anyone new, and I haven't. That's a good situation-ship. Remember when I told you that I wanted to be vulnerable with you? That also means telling the truth. So why didn't you just tell me the truth to start with? Oh, I didn't lie. You didn't ask. That is, oh my God, that is such a red flag, Lisa.

Anyone who says that. But truth telling, that's more of relationship status, I think. Situationship isn't into 100% honesty yet. I think that's true because you should tell the truth to everybody, your friends, your relationships, no matter who it is. So I just see a lot of red flags here. I did tell the truth to everybody your friends your relationships no matter who it is so i just see a lot of red flags here i did tell the truth i just told it to everyone on the radio like i wouldn't have said that information if i was trying to hide something like why didn't you tell me that to start with then like why did you have to wait for it now if you have nothing to hide

why didn't you just tell me when we were seeing each other? When I asked you to be in a situation ship. Common knowledge. We're getting into a situation ship breakdown here. But here's the thing. Like, obviously, there was a miscommunication here, right? He thought one thing. You thought the other. Moving forward, I mean,

would you be willing to only see Lisa and drop the other four situation ships? Or on the other hand, Lisa, would you be willing to take on more situation ships? Equal, four for four. Maybe you guys can exchange situations. I don't know how these work. Lisa just sounds awesome and it sounds like you guys had a real connection.

Lisa doesn't sound awesome. Barnacle sounds awesome. How could you do this to Barney? Barney really likes you and now I'm concerned for Barney because I always trust all the people that my dog likes, and I don't trust you right now. Barney. So Barney and I are going to have to have a serious conversation.

Oh, no. Barney's old, too. We don't want to let him down. Nathan. He might be just delusional. That's probably what it is right now. It's like Barney is partially in this situation-ship, too, Nathan. Yeah, you got to think of the kids, the dog kids.

Maybe you should dump Brenda and Sally and Gretel. Gretel? Now we're in German fairy tale. Whoever it is, and maybe would you be interested in just a one-person situation-ship with only Lisa? I mean... If you're willing to do that, we'll pay for another date between you two. Not a relationship. Just a situation.

I can just go on a date. No situation. Keep it super casual. I am keeping it super casual. I'm only dating the people I'm in situationships with. Okay. I'm sticking to your circle. So we got it.

So you are a poly-situationship person is what you're saying. That is not a term that I acknowledge. If you don't acknowledge it, it doesn't exist. All right. You know what, Nathan? I'm just not into it. I just saw a lot of red flags to

start with, and if you just can't be honest with me up front, then I'm just not going to waste my time. All right. At least you know now. Honestly, this is really a bummer because I really liked hooking up with you and everyone else at the same time. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Man, who knew you could have four situation ships all going at once?

Actually, you could probably have even more if you're really organized. You know what's funny? I think he's the only one that knew that. The other girls don't know that that's happening. He's like, I'm not cheating on anyone, but I'm sleeping with a lot of people. There is no cap on the number of situationships you're allowed to have, apparently.

No, that is not. It did not work out for him, Jeffrey. That's not what you need to take away from that. He still has three other situationships to fall back on. Unless they heard this segment. I'm just telling you, this is the golden age for guys in the dating time. I'm telling you, you don't have to do a single thing. As long as the girl feels kind of good about the label, then you can treat her as badly as you want to.

Never talk to her again, and they'll be cool with it. In a way, he's wildly romantic. No, no, no. And you better not be sarcastic right now. You're terrible. I'm with you, Jose. Yeah, dude. This guy sucks.

Yeah. I guess no shock there wasn't a second date. Darn it. At least not with that girl. Yeah. I'm sure he'll be on the show again. Yeah. Not by choice, though.

Anyway, if you ever want to get a second date update on a relationship, a situation, a relationship, a casual encounter, anything. We'll try and tackle that for you and call the person who isn't calling you back. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. We're so done with new year, new you. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's

because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show ears edition podcast from his hilarious satirical takes on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines.

Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen.