Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update UPDATE: Jolly Old Mess

Episode Date: January 9, 2025

We’re the type of show that will do whatever it takes for our listeners. Even if it means putting on awful British accents. We did it for a couple and today they are back for a Second Date Update UPDATE!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else.

Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes,

we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. People, my people, what's up? This is Quartz Love.

Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Quartz Love Supreme. Man, we've got we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season. But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E., Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more. Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You've got to check them out.

Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. 1.4 billion dollars in NFL quarterback contracts the untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history I'm AJ Stevens vice president of client strategy at Athletes First introducing the Athletes First family podcast the quarterback series my co-host Brian Murphy Athletes First CEO and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert Deshaun Watson Dak Prescott Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to the Second Date Podcast. Thank you so much for being here. Just letting you know that you get a little special treat today because usually we're Monday, Wednesday, Friday for this podcast, but today we got an update update, which means one of our couples that actually went out called back in to give us a update on the relationship, which we only do occasionally. I know when this happens.

It's really fun. So we're going to play the original second date. So you know what's going on and then stick around for the end where we get to talk to them. And it's great. You get the immediate follow up. Imagine the people that heard this and had to wait months. Yeah. Yeah. yeah, yeah.

So, all right. Here we go. Second date update. Nothing worse than coming off of a first date knowing that you made a mistake. Oh, yeah, dude. Jose knows that feeling too well. You just brought up a bunch of memories from, like, last week. Yeah.

Like, man, I never should have ordered the king crab while I'm deathly allergic to shellfish. Well done. What was I thinking? But it's impressive when you do it because it means you're balling out. I just keep stabbing myself in the neck with an EpiPen every five minutes. I can get through this. I mean, mouth-to-mouth counts as a first kiss. Brooke is turned on by it.

And one of our listeners wrote to the show saying he knows that he messed up but he's hoping that his date didn't notice okay the thing is once i read what the mistake was i mean how could she not notice oh now i'm dying to know jess welcome to the show what were you thinking well you know i don't know what i was thinking i thought if i uh if i just kind of brought in a little like added level of elevation that wait real quick real quick what's her name uh casey okay casey's the girl that you met start at the beginning tell us what went wrong yeah yeah so we talked a little bit on uh on dating app and we're like it's just hanging out at a local bar near my my house okay

that seems innocent enough easy yeah it's good vibe yeah yeah and i thought it might be a good idea to talk in a light british accent for a little bit um you always hear the concept that men with accents are sexier and you know yeah couldn't she see on your dating bio that you weren't British? I guess they wouldn't if she lived here. They don't list that they're British. They post only the British. I mean, if I had a phone.

I don't know. If I was British and I was on dating apps, it would be the first thing I would say. Do you know how many swipe rights there is? Only photos of you around London. Yes. To be fair, I don't think that you need to be British to use a British accent.

I don't think women would care if you do a good enough one. It can be pretty bad. Talk to Britney Spears about how well that works out for her. Maybe he has a great British accent. Can we get a sample of it? Well, I quite fondly live across the pond. It's not good. Okay, that's just...

You really did it on the date? Like, from the very start? Well, I was a lot more locked in the day of the date. I was practicing all day. Even when I was, like, going to, like, the gas station earlier, I was trying to be in character to make sure I had it down. Okay, so we know why she's ghosting you. What was her response when she first heard you talk like that?

Well, she asked if I was from there, and I said I lived over there just for a couple months, like, studying abroad. Oh, yeah. In Bridgerton, right? Wait, is that his lie, or is that really true, that you lived over there?

It was a lie. But that's not the point, okay? I wanted to tell the story. Okay, so you told her in a couple months you developed an accent. Oh, that's right, and then moved and forgot everything. Do you ever go to Canada, and then next thing you know, you're saying A after everything? That's not the same.

That's a little different. Mitch, you're a very impressionable young man. That's okay. Did Casey buy it? That's what I want to know. It felt like if she stuck around, she was into it. That's how I played it. Oh.

So she was sticking around. We were still hanging. Okay. Did you ever reveal your real voice? So about two drinks in, I started kind of letting it slip, my normal talking accent, but only in a few sentences sentence is here and there. You're like a Mel Gibson in Braveheart, like a couple with an accent, a couple with an American accent.

Yeah. Like he turns it off all over the place. Yeah. During like the course of an hour and a half, I probably went in and out of the accent half a dozen times, but some of the words could go either way. So I kind of thought, ah, maybe she didn't notice certain parts of it. I don't understand. What's the long play on this? Because if you actually like this girl and you want to go out with her again, you can't continue this your entire relationship.

Well, I figured I could slowly water it down until it was back to my normal accent. Because the thought being I had been back in town long enough. Yeah, you're re-acclimating back into the american accent start wearing like cut off shirts and like get really american with it southern accent spit and chew right okay so how did you two leave it so we ended the day and it seemed fine and then we just kind of went about our business. So are you prepared to tell her the truth when we call her next? Or are you wanting to keep up this farce?

I don't know. What do you guys think? Bro, I think you have to keep going. Look, this is a joke for the first 10 minutes. Then you tell her, just kidding, ha ha. No, wait, we're a show from the BBC and we all call with a British accent. You like it?

Oh, I've been doing it. Yeah, let's practice it right now. Oh, I'm into it. Oh, hello. Oh, crikey. Oh, no, that's Australian. Oh, God. Sometimes there's Australian.

Yeah, the BBC has multiple networks, so we're really going to terrify this girl when we come back and scream at her in a bunch of different accents and try to get you a deal. I'm going to make some tea. No, no. We're going to do it with your second date update

right after this. Hold on. Second date update. You're in the middle of a second date update and we're going to find out how the couple is doing right after you hear part two. This is the news intro from the actual BBC. Oh, I knew that.

And I genuinely don't believe that we can actually pull this off, but it's actually more of a moral dilemma for us right now than it is for our listener, Mitch, who's asked us for a second date update because he faked a British accent during his first date to impress

a girl. He half faked it. Yeah. The American kept slipping out. So clearly clearly, it didn't go very well for him, and that's why he's reached out to us for help. And now, Brooke has suggested that we follow his lie and pretend to call the woman

that he went out with named Casey pretending to be from the news desk at the BBC in London. That's right, Jeffrey. We're here and we're on the job, all right? And where? On the job. What do they call it there?

Job sounds too American. Yeah, it does. We're in the office. We're at the loo. Nope. The loo's bathroom. Okay. I don't think it's going to work.

I didn't even say that. I just called it toilet. This might be a disaster, but I have thought long and hard about what to do here. Okay. And Mitch, are you still there? I am still there. Okay.

Good. So I think, for better or for worse, Oh, you think we need to tell the truth. we should try the British accent. What? No! I didn't think you were going to say that! For entertainment purposes, it's a pact that we're all making.

Yeah! We're all in it together. We all go down together. Us four, along with our good buddy Mitch. That's right. We should call him Mitch. No, not Mitch. Mitch is American.

Mitch is like a flatmate that you've had since college. We need to stop with the accents or we're going to drive all of our listeners away on every continent. Mitch, we're willing to do this for you. We just have to be from some sort of British radio show. And we're doing a segment called The Second Date Shag Off.

This is awesome. Let's do it. I don't know why Jeffrey sounds like a male Mary Poppins. I love it. Very formal. These Americans and their enthusiasm. I love it. Let us give Casey a ring, shall we? Yes, ring-a-ding.

Off, off. Here we go. Hello? Hello. Is this an American woman named Casey? Who's calling? Hello. Apologies for disrupting your day. I'm Jonathan Clark from BBC Radio 4.

You're on our morning talk show here in London. Hello. Hello. I apologize. That's my co-host. She is quite drunk this morning. I have very few words. I apologize.

Casey, are you there? Yes. Is this some kind of joke? I mean... No, no, no. It's no joke. We've phoned you today because we're delving into the raucous dating lives of cheeky Americans. Oh, those Americans.

Wait, no. You mean British men? No. No, Americans. Quite a few Irish coffees this one's had. So your name was actually given to us by one of our listeners, a former local bloke named Mitchell. Okay, yeah.

The two of you had a bit of a snog and a bob the other night. Oh, God, there was no snog and a bob. At an American tavern. I'm not sure what that means, but we had a date the other night, yes. So our jobs this morning is we would like to pry if you don't mind and ask you a bit about how it went okay hold on so mitch talked to you all the way in that's right where are you yes mitch mitch uh spoke to us earlier he said you two had a wicked good time uh may have got a bit knockered at the bar.

And we all want to know, is it factual or just a load of rubbish? You said it was quite lovely, though. Quite lovely. Well, she was quite lovely. She was. Hey, Margaret Thatcher over there, if you could zip it. We're trying to speak to our new American friend, Casey, over here. I love Americans.

Why is she interrupting, Jeffrey? Casey, I do apologize. No British people love Americans. Oh, right. In your opinion, Casey, how did it go? This is so weird. Yes, I know this call's a bit random, but you were doing us a huge service if you could just speak to us for a tiny bit. Well, I don't know what exactly you guys are looking for,

but, I mean, it was fine. Okay, well, at any point during the day, was he acting a bit dodgy? Well, there was a point towards the beginning of the date that I was a little taken aback because I didn't know he had a British accent. It must have been a pleasant surprise to you then. Well, to be honest, I wasn't really sure he was telling the truth, but it's all starting to make sense now,

I guess, because I'm talking to you all. Oh, no. It's true. Oh, Jeffrey. You're never allowed to lie on British radio.

That is one of the rules. But on American radio, they lie all the time. Just lie, lie, lie, lie, lie. And maybe sometimes they should come clean. Okay, look, Casey, I understand sometimes first dates can be a bit tricky Yeah?

Definitely, yeah You're trying to impress someone that you're meeting for the first time So perhaps this was a situation going on with young Mitchell Right How is he better in British than he is? The language just flows out of me Here's the situation. The way that this segment works is we have the person that you went on a date with

sitting on the other line, listening in on the conversation. Yeah. And at the start of this call, we were not fully honest with you, so I do apologize for that. But he is there waiting to speak his piece. Mitchell, are you there? Hello. Hello.

There he is. Your knight in shining armor. Mitch? Is that you? It is. It's me again. This is super strange. I mean, I'm not sure why you had to call England

to help me out for a second date. He's a friend of our shows. A station I'm very familiar with, and in my time there, I spent listening to them a lot and grew quite fond of them. I mean, okay, I guess that makes sense. You went to a lot of trouble for me, so that's kind of cool. Well, I think of you as a quite

proper fit bird, so I wanted to do whatever it took. But remember, Mitch, this may be very hard to keep up. If you know what I'm saying. Mitch will never shies away from a challenge, though, do you, Mitch? No, I do not. Well, bloody hell.

I believe what my drunken co-host is referring to over there is it's quite difficult to go out in the modern world because of the prices of everything. Inflation has made paying for things just absolutely preposterous. And so we're going to take care of all the finances and offer to pay for your next meetup with Mitchell. Maybe some fish and chips and some mushy peas. Now you're making me hungry. A little bit of mint and vinegar. I'd love to cut your film with you as well.

That's something I know we both share in common. Ah, trip to the cinema. Mitch, why did you just sound like an American there? Yeah. Well, he does have American roots. It could be an issue with the telly that we're going over. With the telly. It's the telly phones.

Oh, no. You know, unfortunately, I am staring out the window, and I do see Big Ben off in the distance, and we are running out of time here. It is nighttime here for us. The segment is nearly at a close. Casey, we need an answer from you. Definitively, yes or no,

would you like to go out with Mitch once more? I don't know why everybody's laughing and I feel like I could be missing the joke here. But, yeah. I'd like to try it again. Hey! Hey!

I'm throwing my top hat into the air! It's going to be a quite proper fine night, and we're going to have an incredible evening together again. Oh, Roy. No guy has ever gone to this much trouble to try to get me to go out on a second date with him, so I'm impressed.

Is that a yes? Jeffrey, this is a yes. Anything for a special lady like yourself. All right, Mitch, why don't you pipe down for just a bit? It's another successful second date snog off right here on BBC Radio 4. Stay tuned as we recap all of the Beatles' greatest hits. The Beatles. That's always great.

This is rubbish, Jeff. They never go out of style here in London. Okay. It's Brooklyn Jeffrey. Oh, no, it's Jonathan Clark. Just be quiet. This is not good. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. There's proof

that we could do a successful radio show in England if we wanted to. BBC, you have our number. But now it's time for us to get an update on Mitch and Casey's situation. And unfortunately, Casey couldn't be with us on the call today it's just going to be Mitch Mitch what's going on hey guys how's it going uh what's

going on with you and Casey so we are unfortunately not together anymore what I know I have to know did you ever come clean so I was able to keep it up for a pretty good amount of time, I'll be honest. Really? But unfortunately, I just was not able to keep it up. Honestly, the election really screwed everything up. The election? What? Yeah, because as soon as the election here kind of finished,

she started asking me all these questions about British politics. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no, and you know nothing. What did you say? I told her it's really all about what the queen, what Queen Elizabeth wants to do. Okay, that's not it.

She's just a... You actually said Queen Elizabeth runs the show? Yeah, and unfortunately, she is dead. Yeah, you didn't know that. For a while. Yeah. Did you just finally tell her, I'm sorry I've been lying to you?

At a certain point, we did finally get to it. I got to break from my fake accent and kind of mention, all right, here's actually what's going on. And I tried to wrap it up as, could you even imagine a man trying so hard to keep you happy? Oh, yeah. She wasn't impressed by that? Yeah, that's not. Yeah, so it's just me, guys. So if you know anyone that's attracted to British men, you let them know.

No, no, no. You've got to stop. Yes, you've got to be an Australian guy next time. They'll be able to hold on longer. I don't know. I'm just as attracted to British dudes. No, I can tell a fake one from a mile away. I'm sorry you aren't together, but keep us updated.

If you need more help with your dating life, you can always reach out, okay? All right. Thanks, guys. Only American you can reach out, okay? All right. Thanks, guys. Only American you can reach out. All right. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. We're so done with new year, new you. This year, it's more you on Bumble.

More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini is because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups,

this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC.

Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. People, my people, what's up? This is Questlove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season, but I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E., Jonathan Sheckner, Billy Porter, and so many more. Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You've got to check them out. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. 1.4 billion dollars in NFL quarterback contracts.

The untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history. I'm A.J. Stevens, Vice President of Client Strategy at Athletes First, introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast, the quarterback series. My co-host Brian Murphy, Athletes First, introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast, the quarterback series. My co-host Brian Murphy, Athletes First CEO, and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert, Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.