Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Weak in the Knees

Episode Date: December 3, 2021

The guy on the phone today got "the invite" into his date's house as their night came to an end...But 20 minutes later...He was driving himself home and NOTHING romantic had happened... Now he wants our help finding out what ruined it in that short amount of time!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes,

we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow the Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Listen to mini questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Second date update. Some things just go together, like campfires and s'mores,

trucks and mud, Disney and happy endings. Of course, another perfect pairing is football and flirting. Like, I've seen Tom Brady and his center making eyes at each other all the time. That makes ESPN's top ten every single week. But, you know, you can also flirt at a football viewing party, not just when you're in the games. And that's what happened to one of our listeners, Brian. Brian, welcome to the show, man.

Were you the flirty, the flirter, or the flirtest? I guess you can say I took part in a bit of each. Oh! We're all three. We like that about you, Brian. We have a big appetite. We're a renaissance man of flirting. Alright, so tell us, who were you flirting with? What's their name?

Gina. Okay, and set the scene for us. Are you at a house party? Where are you at? House party. We're watching football. I'm guessing between 17, 22, 23 people in there. Oh, it's a big party, man. And how did you and Gina come to be? Kitchen.

Oh. Okay. It makes sense. I mean, obviously, I've seen her, but I saw her go to the kitchen, so I was like, hey, let me just make my way to the kitchen. Nice. She goes to the kitchen. All of a sudden, you're hungry.

Okay. Yeah, that's a good – And the kitchen is like the soul of the house. It's where everybody hangs out. It's where you get to know people. Yeah, I feel it's easier to strike a conversation in the kitchen than – Okay. Well, I'm assuming in the kitchen then okay i'm assuming in the living room or everywhere else everybody's watching the game and being loud so

if you want to talk to someone so how did you strike up a conversation or maybe she struck up the conversation how did things get going well i think she started flirting with me by uh jokingly saying that i didn't know anything about football and then i just kind of like follow along and i was like oh yes how much How much is a field goal? That's smart. Wow. I was thinking I would have got defensive. I'd be like, how dare you?

I'll tell you the quarterback's name. I'll tell you everyone. That's a good move, though. It's a good judge on her part, too, to see how aggressive the dude is. Yeah. Because you don't want to date like the know-it-all in the room. Yeah. And he's just like, oh, I'm here for the food.

It's a weird thing, though, to see somebody woman-splaining football to a man you don't see that very often i get it i get it you're completely right but if you look at this woman you'd be like yeah anything you say okay it was sexy i can't even spell my name to be honest that's cute all right so how do things go from there uh you know, we started making drinks and just talking, but I don't know if I was just nervous or anxious, but I just ended up saying like douchey stuff. Like, what do you mean? What did you say? Well, we were watching the game in a pretty big TV. And then all of a sudden, it's kind of like an out-of-body experience

where I just saw myself, hey, my TV's bigger than that one. Oh, no. No, you didn't. You think that TV's big. Yeah. Oh, I... But we've all had that moment

where you're, like, looking at yourself and you're like, why are you still talking? Yeah. What did she say when you were bragging about your TV? Was she, like, rolling her eyes or was she like, oh, tell me more? No, no, no. I mean, she laughed and I just put it off and I got lucky on that one.

Okay. So she tried to move on from the moment. Yeah, I would too. Okay. But she was still interested in you after that. Yeah, yeah. We continued to talk and just get to know each other. And it was time for her to leave and she was going to

order an Uber. I said, you know, let me just drive you home and we can continue to talk and just connect. We finally get to her place and she asked me to come up. Okay. To see her big TV.

So did you? Of course I came up. Are you kidding me? How do you go? Touchdown? Field goal? So did you? Of course I came up. Are you kidding me? How did you go? Touchdown? Field goal? What did you get? First down? Nothing happened. Yeah, we just sat.

We had a drink or two. We talked. We talked. She's like, oh, I gotta get ready for my week. And I was like, that's my cue. So did you just, do you think she was waiting for you to make a move? I didn't get that kind of a vibe.

It was, I don't know. It was just weird. I didn't, like, I wanted to, but at the same time, this is just me meeting her. Yeah. The fine line between being respectful and not too. Absolutely. Okay, so how long were you in her place

before you had to leave? No, it wasn't long. 20 minutes. Oh, dang. Wow. To her credit, maybe she, like, you know, sometimes you get a little overexcited. Like, you're in the car, you're in the moment,

you're like, yeah, come up, or maybe that's what I should do, I should invite him up, and then once you're up there, you're like, oh, man, I gotta get up in the morning. Or, like, the chemistry's not there yet. That's true. Okay, so what happened after you left her place? What's since that night i've texted i've called no answer so i'm really

confused sounds like someone needs a hail mary oh okay we're gonna be done with the football puns yeah i literally don't get it we're gonna mansplain all the football stuff to alexis during this break and then when we Yeah, I literally don't get any of them. I'll step back. I'll take a time out. You're accusing Alexis. Okay, we're going to mansplain all the football stuff to Alexis during this break. And then when we come back. I'm hoping that you guys can guide me through the game-winning drive. Okay. Okay.

There we go. Let's end on that note. We're going to play a song. We'll come back. We'll call Gina for you and try and get your second date update, all right? Thank you. All right, hold on. Second date update. Just thank you all right hold on second date update just read a study every time a football game happens a baby is born

that's a fact i mean there must be a connection there that football leads to babies a pigskin no i don't know i don't know why it felt like now you made it weird that's how our listener brian ended up meeting a woman named gina at a football viewing party No, I don't know. I don't know why it felt like. Now you made it weird, Brooke. That's so weird. That's how our listener, Brian, ended up meeting a woman named Gina at a football viewing party. And he ended up driving her home that night, even got the invite to join her in her place. Yeah. It was only there for about a half an hour before the night was pretty much over and he had to leave. So now, can't reach her, and he's calling in the pros.

That's us. Oh, we're the pros. We're the dating pros, supposedly, to help him find out the reason why. Brian, you ready to do this, man? Let's do it. You got your pads on? Okay. You got your jockstrap on?

We don't need a jockstrap. I'm just saying, it's good to have protective gear before we go into these phone calls. Always use protection, brother. Nope. He's adjusting. I got it. Nope. He's adjusting. I got it. He's putting a mouth guard on. Sorry, I'm a little nervous, guys. Oh, I don't think you should be too nervous. It doesn't sound like you did anything

really stupid. I mean, at least from your side of the story. Yeah, she didn't tell us anything. If you did do something stupid, then we're going to find out what you did right now. And we're pretty dumb, so we won't judge. You guys are the best. I love you dumb people. Somebody does, thank God.

Was that an insult? No. Yeah, we're just going to take it as love. All right, let's dial Gina's phone number and see if she answers, see what she has to say, okay? Here we go. Hello? Hey, is this gina speaking gina what's up my name is jeff from the radio show brooke and jeffrey in the morning i'm sorry who oh no yeah it's okay it always happens like this

hello hi gina hey who's this yeah yeah so so you're on the radio right now with brooke and jeffrey in the morning that's brooke my name's jeff we have jose and alexis here too i'm sorry i'm just i'm so caught off guard there seems like there's a lot of people on the phone i didn't i didn't even know they still had radio stations like a real radio station yeah yeah we have a full team here. No, we got a podcast too. Yeah, we're a dying breed, but we're trying to move into the future. Don't worry.

One of us will be gone soon, I'm sure. The point of this call. I mean, you sound legit. No, we are legit. No, it's real. Here we are, Gina. We got two almost compliments in a five-minute period. It's amazing.

But look, we're trying to get a little bit of help for one of our listeners his name's brian and you met him the other day i met him the other day yeah you met him at a football viewing party they're talking about the brian that drove me home that gave me a ride home yes that's the brian the one that you invited up to your apartment after he dropped you off and he like he said he hung out at your place for like a half hour yeah he has a crush on you he likes you yeah i don't mean to sound conceited but a lot of people do i i'm i'm an exercise rider i'm i'm a jockey i ride racehorses oh you're like an equestrian doing it and they get you like a following of hot dudes that follow you around everywhere a lot of big horse fans. Those tight pants. Yeah. So the point I'm making is I act very fizzy.

Okay. The whole point is that Brian had a really nice time hanging out with you that day, and he wants to do that again. I'm assuming that was somewhere in his texts. No? What? Why do you say no? I wasn't sure if we would be a good match, So I invited him upstairs and put him through my test. Through your test?

Test. There's a test upstairs? Like you sit down with a pen. Or is it like an obstacle course? Like a physical test? What test? Because we talked to him before we spoke to you. And he didn't mention anything about having to do a test.

Well, I didn't tell him I was testing him. Oh, a secret test test what's your test well i just i'm a very active person and i one of my pet peeves is i have no tolerance for men that are lazy and he just seemed like one of those lazy types after I put him to my test and it was a very simple test okay he seemed lazy after he offered to drive you home from the party that you guys attended I mean I can turn left and right on the wheel I like how you say lazy person and Jose is automatically feeling offended in this room right now I'm not gonna lie I'm like okay but I wonder how do you tell how do you tell'm not going to lie. How do you tell

if he's lazy or not? What do you do? So I'm bringing out the drinks from the kitchen and I purposely knocked the remote off the end table to see if he'd be a gentleman and pick it up. He did, but after I gave him the look.

So he passed the test, but he didn't pass the test in the way you would have liked him to have passed the test. I don't need a guy that's a couch potato. If you can't move three feet to your left and pick up a darn remote control, something's wrong with you. Okay. But, you know, I see that. You're the one that knocked it over, though.

But, you know, he should have grabbed the drink tray in the first place. I'm kind of with you. Oh, look who's on her side. Exactly. Didn't you say he picked up the remote, though? Yeah, but she had to give him the death stare, Brooke. Yeah. It was.

I had to give him the look. And then he walks over to get the remote, and he doesn't even, like, bend down to get it. He just reaches forward. Okay. Like it was contaminated or something. Like it had germs. He was like, here's your remote. He didn't use his joints enough for...

This is strange. I mean, the person he described that he hung out with, it was different than who you seemed to be. Yeah. She's very active. I don't know. Maybe I had too much to drink that night because i i am very caught off guard by this phone call yeah i think brian is very caught off guard by

this phone call too because he's not gonna do anything about it he never mentioned any of this and and he's finding all of this out for the first time i need to tell you he's on the other line listening and he definitely needs to talk to you yeah Yeah. Wait. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Get down here. I've heard the whole thing. It's the Brian test. It's like, come on. Like, really?

Come on. I'm not a couch potato. And yeah, I did not bend my knees, but guess what? I have patellar tendonitis. What? Patellar tendonitis. He's got bad knees, okay?

It hurts. I don't really know if that's a selling point if you're trying to get him to go on a date it sounds bad i have medical clearance okay you know i'm not gonna tell you that right away you know this is when you invite me to your apartment i mean do you think that maybe you judged him too quickly? Absolutely not. Did you just hear what he said? I totally called him. Wow, are you serious?

You called his patella tendinitis? He's got some kind of itis, that's for sure. Nothing's wrong with those legs. Just because I have a medical condition, he's gonna, like, shut me out like that and brand me as a couch potato because i have issues with my knees i mean maybe he has issues because he was so active that he was overused him yeah actually that's what my doctor said you see oh okay okay

and i think maybe the reason that he didn't want to get up and want to stay on the couch is he wanted to just be close next to you. Can you imagine 10 years from now, you could just see Brian all laying out on the couch with his tendonitis? How do you think your knees are going to be in 10 years after jockeying so much? She's a jockey. That's right. I do yoga, Brian. Like, I can't be with someone that just sits on their ass and watches football. So why the hell in the world would you go to a football party and sit your ass down and watch a football game, huh? Miss, I'm so active.

Shut up, Brian. Go sit on the couch with your bad knees and call another radio station because this is absurd. I'm already here. Okay, well, before you go call the other radio station, Brian, let this radio station ask a question first because we'd like to send you guys out on another date. Yeah, there's passion. There's definitely passion here. There's something. What do you mean another date? I didn't go on a date with Brian.

Okay, sure. We'll offer to send you on a first date on us. If Brian wants a date, he can go to the retirement home or assisted living. He's not coming back here. That's a good idea, Brian. Are you close to an assisted living facility? I don't want to have to walk too far and hurt my knees. Everybody's knees suck, Karen.

I don't want it. Wow. Brian, you up for it? Are you really asking him is he up for it? What's happening? I'd call you guys for help. And now I'm being shamed because I have tendonitis in my knees? Come on, man.

Like, seriously? Hey, it's not going to be forever, man. Like, a little rest and some ice and ibuprofen. It'll get better. It actually gets worse. That's not going to be forever, man. Like a little rest and some ice and ibuprofen. It'll get better. It actually gets worse. That's not true, guys. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. To be your best every day, you need proven quality sleep every night.

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Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts,

to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? iHeartRadio app, Apple Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Listen to many questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers.