Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Textual Healing: Let's Get This Goat Show On The Road

Episode Date: April 13, 2025

We've got a special new episode you this weekend! One of our listeners is worried she may be caught in a scary situation after she was ACCIDENTALLY added to a group chat where she didn't know anyone... She's decided to ask for our advice in a brand new Textual Healing!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The championship is back in the Bay for the first time in 40 years. On the new limited podcast series, Dub Dynasty, we hear from head coach Steve Kerr on how Steph Curry almost never even joined the Warriors. In fact, I thought we had a draft date deal to end up getting him to Phoenix. For the entire behind the scenes story of Golden State's incredible 10 year run, listen to Dub Dynasty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Are your ears bored? Yeah. Are you looking for a new podcast that will make you laugh, learn, and say que? Yeah. Then tune in to Locatora Radio Season 10 today. Okay! Now that's what I call a podcast.

I'm Theosa. I'm Mala. The host of Locatora Radio, a radiophonic novela. Which is just a very extra way of saying... A podcast! Listen to Locatora Radio Season 10 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. From the producers who brought you Princess of South Beach comes a new podcast, The Set Up. The Set Up follows a lonely museum curator,

but when the perfect man walks into his life... Well, I guess I'm saying I like you. You like me? He actually is too good to be true. This is a con. I'm conning you to get the Dilama painting. We can do this together. Listen to The Set Up on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You Feeling This Too is a horror anthology podcast.

It brings different creators to tell 10 vile... No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no vile, grotesque, horrific stories on what scares them the most. You're feeling this too. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I always had to be so good no one could ignore me. iHeart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I always had to be so good. No one could ignore me, carve my path with data and drive. But some people only see who I am on paper.

The paper ceiling, the limitations from degree screens to stereotypes that are holding back over 70 million stars. Workers skilled through alternative routes rather than a bachelor's degree. It's time for skills to speak for themselves. Find resources for breaking through barriers at tearthepapersceiling.org, brought to you by Opportunity at Work and the Ad Council. Hey, welcome to your weekend. And it is your second date update podcast here

with Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. But every Sunday we give you something a little different that we do. Yeah. And today is a textual healing. If you haven't heard this segment, it's basically when a listener is stuck in a text conversation or doesn't know how to respond

and we step in to help. Yeah. And they're texting them live, like while on the phone with us. Yes. They're replying back and forth. Yes. We are kind of texting their friend or family.

Yeah. And today is all about group chat drama. Oh. Which I love. So were kind of texting their friends or family. Yeah, and today is all about group chat drama, which I love. So Jose, before we get into it, what emoji would you use to describe today's textual healing? It would have to be the goat emoji. Oh, it makes sense. Yes, okay, you're about to know because it's starting right now. There's always a moment in every scary movie where the super hot blonde slaps her boyfriend on his strong, muscly arm and she says, stop it Danny, you're scaring me.

Oh yeah. And then Danny turns around and suddenly, oh God, he's a werewolf. Oh! Danny! Danny, no! And while it might feel a little bit dramatic, a little cliche, one of our listeners is worried that she may be caught in a similar scary turnaround situation.

And it all started when she was accidentally added to a group chat where she didn't know anybody. And decided to join in just for fun! So now you're going gonna hear why she decided she needs our advice in a brand new textual healing. That's coming up right after this. It's getting stronger and stronger. Can I get that feeling? Textual healing, textual.

There is one place that we need you to be touching right now. It's not each other. It's your phones. That's good. Yes. We want you to stretch those thumbs, flex those fingers, and prepare to type something that feels oh so right for textual healing.

The segment where we take your messy, confusing, emotionally unstable drafts and help you craft them into poetic messages that instantly fix all of your problems. Wow, that is a large promise there. Or at least that don't completely ruin your life. Okay, there we go. Let's start there. That's where we need to set the bar. You don't have to stretch and use your hands.

You can use whatever you want to text. That is true. Any part of your body is totally fine. You mean like your nose, right? That's what you mean Yeah, it's up to you and who's sliding into our inbox for a little textual TLC A request just came in this morning from one of our listeners named Alana Who says she's in a little bit of a bad spot. So Alana welcome to the show. Yeah

Hey, thanks for having me Producer boy just probably opening stuff because Jeff doesn't get to anything for weeks. Yeah Quick turnaround is it like an emergency? Is that why you emailed this morning? Yeah, it's a little Timely I would say So Alana it's said in your email because it was passed on to me that you were recently added into a random group chat like by accident um I don't know I don't know any of the numbers, but I was just kind of in the mood to play along and Like joke around in the group chat

Scammer that I'm like yes, I will send your money No, I feel a guy on Thanksgiving who like remember the viral guy who making up guys years ago Okay, and he like went over to her house. She was like a grandma now He goes over to her house every So this must be why our producer gave me the screenshots of the conversation you must have sent it to him yes, yes Yes, okay. I'll just I guess read the conversation that happened the first message just to recap was hey everyone Just making sure we're set for Saturday. Another person writes, yep can't wait. And a third person responds, this year's gonna be wild lol. That's when Alana joins the chat and she writes, haha yeah totally, gonna be epic.

gonna be epic. Oh, nice. Who says gonna be epic? I like that you're not even, like you're just- That's a perfect way to blend in your goodness because you're agreeing, you're forwarding, like, you see my part of the group? Oh, please follow it up with, please share pictures from last year because I want to know what it is. Oh, that's smooth.

I should have said that, yes. Oh, darn. Okay, the conversation continues. They start casually referencing stuff But it's kind of vague what they're saying like person one says hope nobody gets too crazy like last time dot dot dot Person two says lmao not naming names, but someone in caps almost lost a tooth Oh my gosh Person three still banned from that Applebee's ha ha

And then Alana jumps in again, she says no goats this year, please Oh, that's what a lot are a lot of our Lana said that I understand a lot of goats No, I just thought it was funny like kind of random You know like goats are always in the frat movies or things get out of control So I just like went for it Yeah, usually the cops arrived surely after the goat show up so Always say I meant greatest of all time The chat continues person two says OMG we should get a goat exclamation exclamation

Person one says I know a guy with a barn we could borrow okay person three bigger fence fewer lawsuits then Alana writes LOL barns Maybe they were in their early 20s until somebody brought in lawsuits, and then I'm like well Crowd and then person one says I'm serious. I will call during lunch It's getting a little bit strange with the goats and the barn talk Organization for the Florida games. Yeah, I thought it was just crazy yoga retreat Alana do you have any idea what they could be talking about? Honestly, I have no ideas my mind goes to a few different places

I kind of want to know more but if it gets even weirder, maybe I don't want to know more I don't know I think you should get an invite to whatever this is and show up because it'd be like one of those viral moments, right? Yeah, do it for the plot basically I mean this is definitely different than most of the textual healings that we do where we have an obvious problem And we're trying to help them fix the problem in this case Alana is just curious. What's going on with this random chat? Oh, I have an idea. Are we ready to text a group? What do you think what if she texts in? Oh my god you guys I lost the information

Can you resend it to me she's still in the group Location no, but they wouldn't looking for a barn right oh I was thinking it was like an e-vite maybe Something like that. I mean you could she could still just play in the middle of what she was doing be like oh wow I guess we're really gonna go all out for the goat, huh? I don't know if we've ever done this before because that kind of keeps it in like the general realm yeah but we need them to get more specific we needed them to like say something specific back so we can figure it out I

guess I could say like are we gonna go with the goat theme or are we gonna do what we did last year like trying to get more information without good because they might offer up what happened last year and we'll get a clearer idea of what this is. Or they're just gonna say yes or no. Maybe, or make it more open-ended. Okay, how about this? Are we gonna go with the goat theme this year or what theme was everybody's favorite in the past?

Yeah. Because then you're asking for an answer instead of just a yes or no. That's good, yeah. Alana, how about that? I can try that. Okay. Yeah. So are we really going with the goat theme? You can put a little goat emoji. Mm-hmm. What's everybody's favorite theme from the past? Okay, cool

I don't know but it's gonna be fun. Yeah, I love a group message. So many people can reply so fast This is so good. I've never been an accomplice to a crime that hasn't happened yet. So Goats belong in barns if the police are listening to this in the future, just know, I am on the fence and I have no part in pushing this forward. The fence that's holding the goat inside. Yes. Very legal. All right. So Alana, you've sent that. We're going to take a break.

OK, cool. We're going to take a break. Come back and see if the group chat continues with more textual healing. Right after this. If you're just joining us, we were called in to do a last minute edition of textual healing where one of our listeners, Alana, messaged our show. She reached out just this morning saying she's in a weird situation. Yeah. She just started a goat party on accident.

We can confirm she is in a weird. It is because it all started when she was accidentally added to a group chat with a bunch of people that she does not know. And decided to respond to it just to mess with them and have a little bit of fun. She wasn't even being mean or anything, she was just being silly. She was actually adding to the con. It sounded like these random people were talking about how they do a party every year and last year's party got out of control

Alana wanted to feel like she was part of the group. So that's why she brought up a goat saying no goats this year, please And the rest of the chat has decided to run with that where now they're talking about visiting people's barns hopping fences possible lawsuits It makes sense because remember we did learn they were banned from Applebee's. Yeah! I didn't have to say that. This is a group that tends to take things a little bit beyond the line.

Seems like it. We think. Yeah, we're not really sure, but that's why Alana is curious. She wants to dig a little deeper to figure out what we're actually working with here, and that's why we sent, are we going with the goat theme idea? What was our favorite theme from years before? Yeah? Yeah? Come back with a detailed list Idea of what we're talking about a lot of they responded. Yeah, I have a few messages

What do they say Okay, buckle up person who says the one from six years ago the buzzsaw one buzzsaw buzzsaw Six years this is a Only good things happen around buzz saws. What kind of party is a buzz? No, I don't know but then person one says yeah, it was before you joined you'll get used to it though Just be sure to bring gloves this time gloves and person three says and trash bags trash bags Yeah, you're thinking awfully innocent for gloves and trash bags

Nobody's going to habitat for humanity and then getting barred from Applebee's. They just cleaned up the kitchen way too nicely. We don't want these folks back in here. Yeah. We're cleaning up highways drunk. It's starting to feel creepy. Yeah, this isn't like your normal party vibe, Alana. Why do they want to bring a go and a buzzsaw? That's not good. Are you sure that you want to keep going down this path alone or is it time to ask? Hey, you know, what's the deal with all the weird supplies? I am honestly still curious. I say we keep going

You want to keep going? Yeah This is good though because the buzz saw happened before your time so you can ask about it Yeah, I never heard about that. What happened. Yeah, no nobody likes that Maybe we need more examples from just besides the buzz saw idea. Yeah. Like maybe we do the play along thing and we go, you know, well, what exactly are we doing?

Cause I'm still having trouble remembering last year's. It was that crazy. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Can I try that? Yeah. Sure. Go for it. We're just trying to collect more information

from these people because we're still not a hundred percent sure What it even is that they do every year if you wanted to find out what the group is you say? What should we title our Facebook group? I've been working on getting us a page Facebook groups, it's party full the app you text it right whatever dude They're with buzz saws and six year long parties. Guys, guys, guys, they responded. Hang on, hang on. They responded to that. So the last thing that you said was,

what exactly are we doing this year because I don't remember what we did last year. It was so crazy. What did they write back? Person one says, don't worry, it's all part of the fun. That's pretty vague. Not remembering things is part of the fun? That sounds super sketchy.

That's the whole goal is to not remember what we do. Back when I used to drink, that wasn't the goal. So then person three goes, yeah, nothing to be nervous about. We've got everything under control. Nervous? Do they? Because I got banned from an Applebee's.

I don't know if that's like the opposite of being under control. It sounds like they're wanting to initiate you this year to me. I know you're there last year I meant person to after that says just trust us. It's gonna be a blast don't trust them Yeah The coolest church ever with a baptism Yeah, and a bowl of Kool-Aid that y'all have to drink at the same time Going that doesn't end well. That's a cult

So if you're just joining us, we're in the middle of textual healing We're helping out our listener Alana who was caught up in a group chat where she doesn't know anybody It started with her innocently wanting to mess with them because it sounded like they did an annual party But now we're getting down into really strange territory. Yeah, it's kind of snowballed Anybody that says just trust us nothing bad's gonna happen. That's not a good spot. You want to be in No, and I'm getting more messages hand wait more coming in I love group chat people are in this group. There are four other numbers four people in the group. Okay, so now What are they writing? Okay? Um

Back to person one. They say we don't talk about last year Oh, and then person three reiterates that and says remember no talking on text about it. Oh great So we're just gonna broadcast all those. Oh god They made a rule where you can't recap no paper trail of what happened last year What if this is actually something illegal? Yeah, I brought that up last segment Brooke and you're like fish posh illegal schmigel Lawyers to get out of it because I thought it was a fun barn party Jeff with a goat like who hasn't been to one Of those talking about buzz saws and it's gonna be like crime group uses goat to rob casinos Radio show gives them the idea Well, they weren't saying not to be nervous, but that then person to just bring the right gear and no questions, okay

We have trash bags gloves and the right gear and a goat it sounds like they don't know you that well Whoever they think you are like you're the new initiate Wait what here's another one okay wait, this is weird, okay, so then they say also as a reminder Dot-dot-dot we don't talk about Darrell. They have a lot of things. They don't talk about Okay, I'm sorry if there's a Darrell. They have a lot of things they don't talk about. Yeah, a lot of rules. Okay, I'm sorry. If there's a Darrell involved, this is some country folk. I mean, we got a barn, we got a Darrell. We're stealing a goat.

It sounds like there used to be a Darrell until things went bad and now we don't talk about it anymore. Oh my gosh. So, okay, and they go, sorry, you're right, Saturday, let's go. Let's go. Sounds like Jose's in on the group chat now. Jose, are you still wanting to continue down the rabbit hole and dig deeper here, Alana? I wanna know what this is. We don't have any closure.

Yeah, I really wanna know too. I just feel like this is getting really sketchy now. I mean, maybe you can text just so that we can get some clarity. Maybe we bring up all of our fears right now. And we say, hey guys, I'm not looking to get locked up by the way. LOL. Yeah. Like, hopefully they'll be like, it's not a bad thing.

What about this? What about you have to tell your emergency contact something? You know what I mean? Like, you're so not cool, bro. I gotta tell my emergency contact where I'm gonna go, guys. Something you mean like you're so not cool My mom says curfews at 9 What do you think Alana okay, I actually sent. I'm not looking to get locked up LOL I gotta say it was better than my emergency contact

I'll back up back Jeff on that one. Okay. Okay. Okay. Here we go. Did someone text back? Okay. Yeah, we got one Person one again and they get to say for the last time no one's going to jail Just a really big goat costume It's a costume party Like a group goat costume party Now just doesn't sound like fun. I feel like you should be like Yeah, because I thought it was a real goat. Now it's just a costume goat. Yeah, now it just doesn't sound like fun. I feel like you should be like, you know what, I'm busy, guys.

I don't think I can make it. It would make sense if they were in big costumes while they got banned from Applebee's. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe I'm just gonna not respond for a bit.

I just, goat costumes are real goat. I don't know. I feel this is all still kind of weird. weird. You're not into goat boys, huh? I guess not. Okay, make sure you do get their address though and text it over to us just because some of us might want to do some research We'll post the address for the goat costume party up on Brooke and Jeffrey's insta stories if it comes out Wouldn't it be great if the real goats were in costumes? I would totally go to that. It'd be so cute.

That would also get you banned from Applebee's. There you go. Makes sense too. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. The championship is back in the Bay for the first time in 40 years. On the new limited podcast series, Dub Dynasty,

we hear from head coach Steve Kerr on how Steph Curry almost never even joined the Warriors. In fact, I thought we had a draft date deal to end up getting him to Phoenix. For the entire behind the scenes story of Golden State's incredible 10 year run, listen to Dub Dynasty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You Feeling This Too is a horror anthology podcast. It brings different creators to tell 10 vile, grotesque, horrific stories on what scares them the most. Mike, please don't kill me. You're feeling this too.

Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. From the producers who brought you Princess of South Beach comes a new podcast, The Set Up. The Set Up follows a lonely museum curator, but when the perfect man walks into his life, Well, I guess I'm saying I like you. You like me?

He actually is too good to be true. This is a con, I'm conning you to get the Dilawba painting. We can do this together. Listen to The Set Up on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Are your ears bored? Yeah. Are you looking for a new podcast that will make you laugh, learn, and say que?

Yeah. Then tune in to Locatora Radio Season 10 today. Okay! Now, that's what I call a podcast. I'm Theosa. I'm Mala. The host of Locatora Radio, a radiophonic novella. Which is just a very extra way of saying, a podcast.

Listen to Locatora Radio Season 10 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Sometimes as dads, I think we're too hard on ourselves. We get down on ourselves on not being able to, you know, we're the providers. But we also have to learn to take care of ourselves. A wrap-away, you got to pray for yourself as well as for everybody else, but never forget yourself. Self-love made me a better dad because I realized my worth.

Never stop being a dad. That's dedication. Find out more at fatherhood.gov. Brought to you by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services and the Ad Council.