Bulwark Takes - BOMBSHELL: FBI Director Reportedly Drinking, Missing Work, Sometimes Unreachable

Episode Date: April 18, 2026

Tim Miller reacts to a jaw-dropping article in The Atlantic which alleges that FBI Director Kash Patel was repeatedly unreachable on the job—including an incident where security considered breaching a locked door to wake him. From a bizarre meltdown over a computer login to allegations of heavy drinking, missed briefings, and weekends in Vegas, Tim takes on this shocking report.Read Sarah Fitzpatrick’s article in The Atlantic: https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/2026/04/kash-patel-fbi-director-drinking-absences/686839/

Hey, everybody, Tim Miller from the Bull Work here. There is an amazing story in the Atlantic about drunk cash Patel being passed out at the switch at the Federal Bureau of Investigation. And I had to get that to you as soon as I could. So I'm going to give you an annotated reading of this banger of a story from Sarah Fitzpatrick over at the Atlantic. I have more guests from the Atlantic than any other outlet. So I don't feel like I'm giving them short shrift by doing this on my own.

But you should subscribe to them. If you have subscribe to Blerc Plus first, you know, sub-decker YouTube, subscribe to Bollard Plus first. Subscribe to our feed. But we've already done that. Man, great bang for your buck over at the Atlantic. Let's read this story together. Man, is it scary and delicious and filled with Schadenfreude all at once? headline the FBI director is

MIA Cash Patel has alarmed colleagues with episodes of excessive drinking and unexplained absences. Here we go. It begins, deep breath. On Friday, April 10th, as FBI director Cash Patel is preparing

to leave work for the weekend, he struggled to log into an internal computer system. He quickly became convinced that he had been locked out and he panicked, practically calling AIDS and allies to announce that he'd been fired by the White House. Bro has no chip. You know, no child.

Did you just, maybe you should just double-checked your, your password keeper, you know? Maybe you accidentally did that thing where you chose the strong password and, and you don't, yet don't have it saved. That's something to consider before frantically announced that you'd been fired just because you can't get into your web portal. You know, it continued. Nine people confirmed the story, by the way, nine people confirm the story. That's important to say because the White House's reply.

saying this is fake news and they're going to sue. So I guess Jeffrey Goldberg and the folks at the Atlantic will be seeing them in court. I'm going to believe the nine sources in the Atlantic over the liars in this administration, but to each their own. The story continues. Two of the people described his behavior when he got locked out as a freak out. The result of that freak out was people across the FBI, across Congress, other officials in the Trump administration,

had started to deal with the possibility that there's going to be a new head of the FBI. Some of them were happy he was gone. Some of them were thinking about his replacement. The White House fielded calls from inside the Bureau and members of Congress asking who was in charge. Turned out that it was Patel, though, still in charge. He hadn't been fired. It was just a technical error, and it was quickly resolved. So, you know, and that's not the biggest bombshell story in a vacuum,

but it does show a guy that's pretty punchy, you know, a guy that is a little quick to the trigger finger for, you know, somebody that's in a job that requires a lot of judgment, you know. And if you had somebody in your office, let's say, that had gotten locked out of their slack. their password was working. And rather than going to the IT guy, I'm like, hey,

I'm locked out of slack. They started panicking, calling people saying like, I've been fired. They fired me. They didn't deserve me. You know, they think they can do better without me.

Whatever, that's fine. I'm going back to Vegas. I'm going to go party with my girlfriend. She's hot. You know, fuck these people. I'm out.

And then like five minutes later, you realize that they just, you know, hadn't done the n-per-sand, they did the A instead. Like, what would you think about that colleague? You think they're a little bit loose cannon, you know, somebody who can't handle too much adversity. I'm like, that would be okay if their job is like accounting or something.

But, you know, the head of FBI, a lot of adversity. Let's continue. Maybe that's just one example. We scroll down and we're talking about the other sources that, The Atlantic spoke to inside the bureau and around the administration. These sources said that the problems with Patel's conduct go well beyond what has been previously known and reported. They include both conspicuous inebriation and unexplained absences. His behavior often alarmed officials of the FBI and DOJ,

even as he won't support it from within the White House, for his eager participation in Trump's efforts to turn the federal law enforcement agency against his received enemies. He's tried, at least. Not a lot of success on that front. Several officials tell Sarah Fitzpatrick of the Atlantic, the Patel's drinking has been a recurring source of concern across the government. They said he's known to drink to the point of obvious intoxication in many cases at the private club Neds in Washington, D.C.

He's also known to drink to excess in the poodle room, where all the Butch alphas go, the poodle room in Las Vegas. He frequented he spends part of his weekends. weekends there. Should the head of the FBI ever be in the poodle room in Vegas? You know, maybe like their friends 50th or their brother's bachelor party, like maybe one time during your tenure. You have an excuse, you go to the poodle room, the deputy director's in charge. But cash Retele is frequently spending his weekends at the poodle room in Vegas. Our taxpayer dollars are flying him from D.C. to Vegas so he can get hammered.

let's pull up the poodle room what i don't even know what happens there poodle room's in the fonta blue hotel i don't know if any of you have been there and seen cash send me that message but i don't know it just seems like the fbi director should be on the job a little bit more than this but we'll continue early in his tenure meetings and briefings had to be rescheduled for later in the day as a result of his alcohol fueled nights six current and former officials and other familiar with Patel's schedule told me, let me tell you.

I go out drinking here in New Orleans. I got a lot of buddies. I like to go to concerts. I got a podcast every morning. I tape it for you guys. Sometimes, every once in a while, some of you tell me in the comments that I look a little worse for the wear.

That's okay, but I'm here. I'm in the office. I've never once emailed producer Katie's and said, hey, gals, can we tape the pot at one today? Because, you know, I had one too many pops at Tipitinas last night. Like, I've never done that.

Not one time. The head of the, I'm a fucking podcaster. I'm a podcaster. Wouldn't be that big of a deal, actually, if I ever did that. If I was so hungover, I couldn't podcast till one. And then that podcast came out at seven at night instead of four in the afternoon. Some of you guys would be annoyed and then, you know, life would move on. Like, this is, this is an opinion podcast.

Cash is the head of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. He's supposed to be protecting us from terrorists. It's one of the most important jobs in the country. country. He's skipping meetings? He's skipping meetings because he didn't take his Z biotics pre-alcohol. That's a freebie for you guys at Z-biotics. I just, that is insane.

Happen multiple times. Going to six current and former officials. We keep going. On multiple occasions in the past year, members of a security detail had difficulty waking Patel because he was seemingly intoxicated according to information

supplied to the Justice Department and White House officials. A request for breaching equipment normally used by SWAT and hostage rescue teams to quickly gain entry into buildings was made last year because Patel had been unreachable behind locked doors, according to multiple people familiar with the request. They had to send the SWAT team in because dude was so hungover that he had passed out, was unresponsive to phone calls, didn't put his phone on the charger, no, like didn't brush his teeth, just fell asleep in the shoes Donald Trump gave them that are four sizes too big and you know head on the toilet we had to spend our

taxpayer dollars again to send a SWAT team in to wake bro up wipe the vomit off his mouth like dude dude how many beers did a shotgun last night like we've got we need you to prove approve this warrant wake up like we've got some we've got some rumors of a Iranian sleeper cell in Texas. We need you to lock in on that. Like, get your head off the bathroom floor. Mr. Director. Current and former officials told the Atlantic that they have worried what would happen

in the event of a domestic terror attack while Patel's in the office, they said their apprehension has increased significantly in the week since Trump launched his military campaign against Iran. That's what keeps me up at night. One official said, somebody in this administration is staying up at night because there's so worried about cash. Think about how worried that makes me. I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight. This is truly amazing. If you're a desk jockey at a PR firm and you go out to C.T. And the fucking vodka sodas and Molly are just flowing. And you fall asleep on your friend's couch

and wake up with your shoes on fully clothed at 10.30 a.m. the next day with seven unrespond to two calls from your superior at the PR firm. At the end of the day, life is going to move on. You're going to be a little embarrassed. You go in, you take a shower, you go to lunch. Sorry, boss. Maybe you make up a lie. Maybe you get a cool boss.

Like, there's certain jobs where this is like, not great, not good behavior. if it happens a couple more than a couple times, like you should probably see a therapist or consider AA. But you know, if it happens every once in a while, you're in your 20s. This guy's the director of the FBI, not responding to calls.

Like, it's a job where you need to respond to your phone. Like, dude's hanging out in Vegas in the poodle room. It's one thing we shotgun on beers with the U.S. hockey team. A lot, you know, a lot of complaints about that. A lot of people judged them, including according to reports, the president. But like, okay, it'd be one thing if that was like, hey, I got too excited.

We won the goal. I'm a hockey guy. Inappropriate. This ain't that. This is like multiple officials inside the FBI, talking to the Atlantic, be like, we can't get a dude on the phone. He's such a drunk. He's not showing up to work. He's paranoid.

He's looking around. Like, he's hearing helicopters. This guy needs a cleanse. This guy needs to go to Mexico and spend a couple weeks in a day. detox center. All right. Doing yoga. That's what he needs.

Drinking green juice. Clean out the system. He does not need to be running the FBI. Get Cash Patel out of the FBI immediately. If I'm the Democrats, I'm writing up my letter right now. Call him in front of Congress,

call his colleagues in front of Congress, and get to the bottom of this. All right. I'm talking. Tim Miller, subscribe to the feed, shout out again to Sarah Fitzpatrick. Great story over the Atlantic. We'll be seeing you all soon. Peace.