Bulwark Takes - JD Vance Declares War on Reality in Greenland

Episode Date: March 29, 2025

JD Vance flew to Greenland—and delivered one of the most embarrassing, confused, and hostile press conferences imaginable. Tim Miller takes on the absurdity of Vance’s remarks, from bizarre threats toward Greenland and Denmark, to a baffling confrontation with Canada.

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dessert plus protein minus sugar and carbs. And our zero sugar yuzu mango hydration mix packs an authentic citrusy punch and a mental boost from lion's mane and magnesium. The best part? 10% of sales go directly to Chef Keller's nonprofit that supports aspiring young chefs. Great taste, great nutrition, great mission. Total no-brainer. Go to IQBar.com today and enter promo code KELLER20 to get 20% off all IQBar products plus free shipping. That's IQBar.com, promo code KELLER20. Hey guys, it's Tim Miller from The Bulwark. J.D. Vance just completed a ridiculous, farcical, insulting, absurd press conference from the military base in Greenland, since the people of Greenland wouldn't welcome him into their homes. And I want to give you kind of an annotated breakdown of this, focusing at the top on his messaging on Greenland and Denmark. But then I want to get around to what he said about Canada as well at the end. So I've got two bites. And we're just going to kind of

cut into each of them. And I'll give you give you my analysis. So let's go to JD in Greenland. The president said today that we have to have Greenland. By being here today, are you also conveying that message that the U.S. is very serious in its desire to acquire Greenland? Well, the president said we have to have Greenland. And I think that we do have to be more serious about the security of Greenland. We can't just ignore this place. We can't just ignore the president's desires but okay first this is you know this is one of the things where like you can say it's simple and it's clear but that's kind of thing you say when you're when you understand you're actually being evasive we both can't ignore this place but we also can't ignore the president's desires

we don't really want it you know we want a security. We want a partnership. But also, the president said we have to have it, and we can't ignore his desires. So not a great start there. Not exactly very clear what you're trying to say. Let's look at the next little bit. We can't ignore what I said earlier, which is the Russian and Chinese encroachment in Greenland. We have to do more. Now, what the president said in his State of the Union address, and he was very clear about this, is we respect the self-determination of the people of Greenland. But my argument again to them is I think that you'd be a lot better

coming under the United States security umbrella than you have been under Denmark's security umbrella. Because what Denmark's security umbrella has meant is effectively they've passed it all off to brave Americans and hope that we would pick up the tab. OK, Denmark is part of NATO and is contributing to NATO's defense. I don't know how many more times I can say this. We are in a military alliance with NATO. All right. North Atlantic Treaty Organization. Greenland's in the North Atlantic. Right there in the name. Denmark contributed, I think, spent over 2.5% of its GDP on defense last year, aiming for about 3% this year. They're hitting their targets. They're part of a treaty organization where there are other countries that have military spending.

Like, I don't – why are you just taking random slaps at Denmark? What exactly are they not doing that you want them to do? None of that is clear. It is just like high school bully, you know, spitball spitting at Denmark because she's the pretty girl, I guess. I don't know. Let's keep listening. We're simply saying to the people of Greenland, when the president says we've got to have Greenland, he's saying this island is not safe.

A lot of people are interested in it. A lot of people are making a play. We know that America cares about the security of this island for the people, for the sake of the people of Greenland. What is he even talking about? Right now, the biggest threat to the people of Greenland is you, J.D. Vance. It's this fucking gringo that just flew to a military base with his national security advisor in their country and started making oblique threats about how he's going to take it over you're the you're the threat

you're saying the island is not safe who is the island not safe from down it's not safe from you you're the only person the island's not safe from like the chinese and the russians okay russia is bogged down in ukraine right now are you implying that russia is going to march across Europe all the way to Greenland? Because that is a policy that is at odds with everything that you say about Russia's plans for Ukraine. The Chinese are coming to Greenland? How? In what context? Again, we are in the north atlantic treaty organization

there are you know that's the other line from that is like oh they're people making a play lots of people are making a play for greenland nobody's making a play you're making a play what are you what are you talking about let's finish this clip our our message is very simple yes the people of greenland are going to have self-determination. We hope that they choose to partner with the United States because we're the only nation on Earth that will respect their sovereignty and respect their security because their security is very much our security as these brave Americans show. The U.S. is the only one that will respect their sovereignty. You're not respecting their sovereignty right now. If you're in Greenland, why would you think that the U.S. would be the ones that would respect their sovereignty? Why would you think that?

The Europeans are respecting their sovereignty. Okay. The press conference goes on. I want to play a bit from another clip. President has previously not ruled out military force when he's talking about taking over Greenland. But your rhetoric today is more about encouraging the Greenlandic people to vote for independence. Do you think the rhetoric has changed about that? Or what's your message there? No, I don't think it's changed at all. Look, the president said clearly he doesn't think that military force is going to be necessary,

but he absolutely believes that Greenland is an important part of the security, not just of the United States, but of the world and, of course, the people of Greenland, too. It's very simple. I think the president's been very consistent here from his State of the Union, from his inaugural address and every public statement that he's made this territory greenland really matters for the security of the united states again here we are once again with the president has been very clear don't not be military force but we might have to it's like it's like what there's no clarity This whole thing is unclear. This whole thing is a farce. Let's go back to the clip.

It's extremely vulnerable right now. And if the people of Greenland were willing to partner with the United States, and I think that they ultimately will partner with the United States, we could make them much more secure. We could do a lot more protection. And I think they'd fare a lot better economically as well. This has to happen. You think the people of Greenland will ultimately want to partner with you? You guys couldn't find a single person in Greenland to have lunch with your wife. That's why there are military guys behind you at the press conference, because no Greenlanders wanted to have a press conference with you. That was your first try. Your first try was you wanted to have Greenlanders have a press conference with you. You sent little American lackeys across the Atlantic going door to door,

and nobody wanted to do it. So here we are. I'm not that optimistic about your plan, I guess what I'm saying. Two more clips. And the reason it has to happen I hate to say it is because our friends in Denmark have not done their job in keeping this area safe they just haven't done it he attacks Denmark again here and again no details what hasn't Denmark done what what is then what does what is Denmark supposed to do what do you want Denmark to do? You're just like taking free shots at our allies.

People of Denmark fought with us in Afghanistan, in Iraq, in Africa. We're in mixed units with Danish soldiers in NATO. What are you talking about? What hasn't Denmark done? Let's listen to the final clip. It's very simple. For all of our friends in the American media who attack the administration for pointing out the obvious, what is the alternative? To give up the North Atlantic? To give up the Arctic? To China? To Russia? And to other regimes that don't have the best interest of the American people at heart? We have no other option. We need to take a significant position in Greenland to keep the

people here safe, but to keep our own country safe too. What is the alternative to you co-opting Greenland to a hostile takeover of Greenland? I've got an alternative. How about Greenland stays exactly as they are, as part of the North Atlantic Treaty Organization? A country that is part of Denmark, that is included in our shared military obligations that we have with other liberal democracies in the Western world. How about that? That's the other option. It seems like a good option to me. There's no problem with the current option. You don't, you've not presented any evidence that there's a problem with the current option. All you're saying is that Donald Trump wants Greenland and that there's something wrong, which means we have to have it.

It's nonsense. It's all nonsense. It's just as nonsensical as the argument about Canada. Let's play the clip of J.D. Vance talking about Canada. The tariffs. There's been some retaliation, some signals at least in the media, that Canada's going to respond. Some of these others are going to respond to the President's tariffs. What's your message for Americans that are going to see costs increase on auto

manufacturing, new cars, that kind of thing? Is it by America or what's the message going forward there? Well, let me say a couple of things. First of all, for the Canadians, and we have many dear friends in Canada, and of course we love the Canadian people, but the Canadian leadership threatening retaliatory tariffs against the United States, as President Trump often says, they just don't have the cards. There is no way that Canada can win a trade war with the United States. There it is. Canada doesn't have the cards. What game are we playing with Canada where they would need cards? Canada is our northern neighbor. They're an ally. They're a trade partner.

It's like, oh, the Canadians don't have the cards. They can't get a trade war with us. You're the one starting the trade war. You're the one calling the ex-prime minister governor and saying that they should be the 51st state. You guys are doing it. You're the aggressors. What do you mean they don't have the cards? What cards? What game are we playing?

Like, let's just have free trade between us and our northern neighbor how about that let's not take random swipes at them and and and try to bully them what is what is the point what are we getting out of that all the only result of this is suffering economic suffering weakening of our alliances and you know long-term limiting of american power throughout the world so there you go heck of a job jd looking great in that little little sweater there looking so oh you're such a military man jd pathetic pathetic subscribe to the feed i've got more coming i'll see you soon