Camp Gagnon - Craziest CIA Honey Traps that ACTUALLY Happened

Episode Date: February 20, 2025

🚨Remember to Rate Us 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @shop.mando and get $5 off your Starter Pack (that’s over 40% off) with promo code CAMP at shopmando.com! #mandopod #sponsored #ad Yo! We're diving deep into the shadowy world of espionage and seduction with a look at some of the most shocking honey traps in history. From the infamous Romeo Project that saw East German spies seducing lonely women to the jaw-dropping tale of a transgender Chinese spy who almost caused an international incident, we'll explore the scandalous stories behind these covert operations. We'll also delve into the sordid saga of Richard Miller, the first FBI agent convicted of espionage, and the haunting case of John Vassall, a British civil servant blackmailed into betraying his country. And that's just the tip of the iceberg - we'll take you on a wild ride through the annals of espionage, from Martha Dodd's infiltration of Hitler's inner circle to the stunning revelations about Israel's nuclear capabilities. So join me as we pull back the curtain on these infamous honey traps and ask the burning question: would you fall for one? WELCOME TO CAMP! Shoutout to our sponsors: Mando, MagicSpoon, Huel, Morgan & Morgan, Prize Picks and Bluechew Prizepicks: https://prizepicks.onelink.me/ivHR/CAMPMagicSpoon: https://magicspoon.com/campHuel: https://huel.com/camp FREE NEWSLETTER HERE: https://camp.beehiiv.com/Guest: Joey AveryTIMESTAMP: 0:00 Intro3:41 Romeo Project 9:01 Gabrielle Kliem12:28 Fake Priest + The Rabbi Trick17:38 Closing of The Romeo Project19:14 Karl and Hana Koecher30:06 CIA Tricks Karl34:09 Richard Miller Espionage + Mormonism 43:41 KGB Infiltrates Richard Miller48:35 Richard Miller and KGB Agents Trials51:29 Transgender Chinese Spy1:04:41 KGB Blackmails John Vassall1:10:49 Vassall Gets Busted1:16:52 Israel’s Nuclear Capabilities + Mordechai Vanunu1:23:38 Martha Dodd Infiltrates Hitler’s Inner Circle1:30:31 Martha Turns On The U.S.1:34:30 Won Jeong-hwa Infiltrates South Korean Military1:45:44 To Goon or Not to Goon1:48:04 Won Jeong-hwa Is Caught and Arrested 1:49:25 2020 Chinese Honey Trap In The U.S.1:54:24 The Profumo Affair Honey Trap

Oh, I'm excited. This is a perfect topic. I genuinely thought this for you. A little bit of spycraft, a little bit of sex. Let me introduce you to Shi Pai Pooh. And that's been the episode. Thank you guys so much. Hey, what's that girl? All right, well, you're gonna, that's, okay. Okay. I have a really, we might have a translator on our hand.

Yeah. He's just like, I'm trying to help. Yes, I'm just a, and you can fix. I will help the children. Yeah. No, she was in Paris. She was helping. NATO in Paris. Right.

Nato's in Paris. And so she confessed her sins to a priest who was just his homie. Do you have the priest in your pocket? You're good. He quickly won the sympathy of South Korean authorities. She never going on Joe Rogan's podcast, okay? And then eventually it's flopping everywhere. No, this is not Yonemi.

Okay, Yonimi was never a spy. She would never, okay? We think. She wasn't. This is going to be a question that we end up at a lot during this episode where I'm like, what percentage of them as great spies and what percentage of them love swinging. You step away, you take a hiatus, you go to

check the devil's the clock. Which many of them responded, I don't know what they're talking. Yeah, I've no idea. What parties? It's fucking crazy. You know, I'm Team USA, obviously, but I like them. But shout out to them, yeah.

Fun couple. This guy's awesome. This guy is awesome. He just works out. He's doing pull-ups on a log. He just fucking does coal plunges and just chills. What's up, everybody? Welcome back to camp.

Yes, we're here in the tent. This is the tent talks. This is the show where I explain the most interesting, fascinating, controversial, morbid, and sexual topics from around the planet and the internet. To my dumbest friends. Again.

And oh boy, we got a triple rounder right here fresh off the short bus. He's got a helmet on, took it off for this episode. Guys, we got Joey Avery. That is an insane introduction. And every time you introduced me, I wonder why I'm here, but hopefully I'll learn one thing from the genius himself.

You have learned. I have learned quite a lot. I'm actually not going to lie. You've learned about the eschatology of all the major religions. Yes. You've learned about the FBI? Yes. And today, you're going to learn about something similar but different.

The honey traps. Ooh. You ever heard of this? No. A honey trap, also known as sex spionage. Ooh. This is a subgenre or a subgenre. or a subset of spy craft

where spies will be able to go in and extract information, intelligence, and data, not through force, not through some type of mental manipulation, not through some type of covert, you know, a job or something like that, but through a different job. Yeah, boss.

Hand. Oh, nice. Blow. Oh, I'm excited. This is a perfect topic. This is fun, dude. thought this for you. A little bit of spy craft,

a little bit of sex? Exactly. Come on. I mean, this is something that I feel like, I feel like I could fall prey to. But I wouldn't even have sex with one of these spies.

I think I would just chat with them. Yeah, you'd just be like, a woman who really listens. Exactly. Who, I shouldn't say that. Who finds what I have to say interesting all the time.

That's how you know it's a spot. Exactly, right? Yeah, because at some point, they should be like, that's enough. Yeah, we should sit with me at the bar. Yeah, you want to get out of here? I'd be like, well, I've actually,

One more story. And I really want to show it. I promise I'm trying to fuck you. And you're like, no, no, no. Let's have another Guinness. Yeah, exactly. She's like, I love how you love Guinness. She's perfect.

Yeah. It's a fascinating thing. I mean, sex lies, espionage. Seems like a James Bond movie, but no. It's real life. And yeah, there's a whole bunch of them. And some of them are insane. It is perfect, though.

I mean, if you think about people in powerful positions, which traditionally, whether this is good or bad, that has been men. Whoa. Whoa. Traditionally. I'm just doing stats. You think men are the only people that could be good leaders, white men? That is not what I said.

That is not at all what I said. That's literally what you just said. This is a backwards looking analysis of the statistics. Okay. Which will tell you frequently rulers have been men, not all the time and not even potentially most effectively. But what is their Achilles heel? Trying to get that sucked.

Yeah, exactly. I mean, JFK? Yeah. He got murdered by Marilyn Monroe. He got his head blown off. Did you know Marilyn Monroe killed him? I did not know that. Now, that is an interesting angle.

No, it was Israel. But anyway, whoa. We're going to go through some of the... Have you ever heard that theory? That's not one I subscribe to. I know that everything that has happened in society, there is a theory that the Jews did it. But I hadn't heard this one. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that is a theory. What's the concept? It was just Israel, Mossad. The precursor massage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a topic for a different episode. Yeah, you're getting this off track. But you know who's actually great at honey trapping?

Hmm. The good old boys in blue. The Jews? Yeah. There's a couple of good ones. We'll get to that. But let's start with the Stasi. The East Germans, shall we?

Yes. The Cold War grips Europe. East Germany's intelligence agency, the Stasi was crafting one of the most effective espionage strategies in history and kind of kicked off a lot of you know, this spycraft tactic of honeypotting. This is known as the Romeo Project, led by the infamous Marcus Wolfe, relied on charm, seduction,

to love to extract secrets from the heart of West Germany's government and military. So this guy was basically a genius espionage sort of spy dude, right? Grows up in Moscow, trained by Soviet intelligence services before returning to Germany by the age of 30. He's the chief of foreign intelligence.

By your age, imagine that, chief of foreign intelligence of the Stas. I could do that. And for decades, he eludes identification from Western intelligence. He's known as the man without a face. Oh, and honestly, kind of a nice face. Yeah, not a bad looker.

Not a bad, hey, kind of a decent looker. Yeah. Looks like Mr. Rogers, but with some bad ideas. You know what I mean? And he basically sees an opportunity to exploit the aftermath of World War II. The world's taken a heavy toll on the male population, leaving many West German women in government, military, and intelligence positions who are now lonely, longing for companionship.

Wow. Realizing that romance could be a powerful weapon, what does he do? He trains and deploys an army of what they call Romeo spies, young attractive men whose mission was to seduce these women, codenamed Julietts. See, this is already the opposite of what I was expecting. What are the odds, right? I thought it was chicks going for dudes all the thing. No. Why do you think I thought that?

I think I was your sexist pig? No. You don't think women could do this? Wait, you don't think men could do this job? Yeah. You're a misandrist? Why are we still better? You're a misandrist, dude.

Yeah. I hate misandria. Ugh. Ugh. A term no one really uses. No. You never really hear people rally about me. Wait, what is that?

Is that people who hate men? Yes, that's the inverse of misogyny, if I'm not mistaken. I see, yes, the less popular version. Yeah. So, basically, the Romeo spies were selected through a rigorous process. Not just any men. Can we pull up a picture of these Romeo spies? So this dude's job was basically like, I'm going to find all the hottest dudes and

Germany and get them to try and bang chicks. This is probably the greatest spy job for a dude, although probably sometimes some of these ladies, you know, wolf. Basically, they're educated culture, and most importantly, exceptionally charming. These young men were trained in the arts of seduction and how to identify vulnerabilities, understand women's emotional needs, and master the fine art of making their targets feel special and valued.

And for a low price today, I'm going to be teaching a select group of men just how to do that. Okay, I'm teaching a course. I'm going to be teaching a course, okay? I mean, it's how you can, it's called the game. Yeah, have you heard of this? Yes, yeah, I was going to say. So here's one of the East German Romian.

Did they just teach them the game? Yeah, literally. Were they all peacocking? Yeah. They're like, put on a fedora. Yeah, yeah. Wear a blue jacket. And, uh,

just nagging a bunch of like high up women. Yeah, basically. And so before deploying these spies of West Germany, the Stasi gathered comprehensive psychological profiles of potential juliettes. They knew their likes, dislikes, even preferred physical traits of their targets armed with this information,

which I don't know how they figure that out. Oh, you think girls don't talk about that sort of thing? All right, fair. Maybe there's a podcast. Yeah, all they did is just go to the bathroom once. Armed as information, they orchestrated, quote, chance encounters meet their juliettes

in seemingly innocent circumstances, a bus stop, a cafe, or a dark alley. And from there, the seduction began. The dark alley one I added. Okay. That's not really what it was. So I was already thinking that it would be kind of suspicious if like a straight up like 10 hot dude just pulled up to you to bus stop and was like, hey.

Yeah. You've been watching sex in the city lately or whatever. Like I would love. I would love to know what like what the first move was. Yeah, I'm fascinated. They should publish these findings for lonely dudes. It's absolutely top secret. Yeah.

Unclassified. A pop secret game. Mm-hmm. We need to actually petition the German government. I wonder if they used their powers for evil. Like, they got, like, discharged, but they just, like, kept picking up chicks with the, like, secret, like, Nazi ability to fucking do it. Well, I feel like back in the day, the whole, like, two families was the minimum. You know what I mean?

Like, like, a guy having multiple families. Yes. Two is, like, completely fine. Had to wear a lot of hats. Right? Like, I feel like that was, like, the bare minimum. And, like, social media's kind of kept us accountable now that it. Yes.

But back in the day, you'd have a bunch of families. And so as a result, they probably were doing this. Yeah. I mean, I spoke to a gentleman on this very show, Jack Barski, a very fine, charming and very intelligent spy for the Stasi. He was technically KGB. Uh-huh. Did he riz you up?

Yeah. Yeah, he absolutely did. He was just spit in game. He was just like, come on. He's incredibly charming, very, very funny. I shouldn't say very funny. He's funny. Right.

But he's a great guy. And he moved to America as a spy. and then fell in love, had a child, and he loved his child so much that he didn't go back to his family in East Germany. You told me this during the FBI episode. Crazy, right? Yeah.

So, let's fast forward to how this actually happens. A 12-year-deception of Gabriella Klein. 32-year-old translator to the East Embassy. Sorry. Wait what? Nothing. Keep going. Did you just black out?

Yeah, no, I thought you said a 30-year-old trans lady, and I was like, whoa. He said translator. I was like, There is a trans lady story. Good. Oh, you're going to love this one. This one is crazy.

Visibility for all. Her name is Bridget McRone. Okay. Have you heard of this whole thing? Wait, is that, is that McCrond's wife? Yeah, exactly. Dude, they do this to everybody. They did it to Big Mike.

They do it to everybody. They said Trudeau's getting cucked out by Idris Elba. They, you know, they, really? That's a piece of Canadian gossip. Is that Trudeau and his wife, I believe, had some sort of breakup. and they say that Eder's Elba is cracking them cheeks. Which I think would be an honor. I just, yeah, I'm like, that seems like kind of a win.

Yeah. You know what I mean? You're like, all right, yeah. Dude, we're just, I'm training it. We're fishing in the same pond. All right, Eders. All right. So be it.

Gabrilea Klein, she's a 32-year-old translator to the U.S. embassy in West Germany, and she was a notable victim of the Romeo Project, which, of all the things to be a victim of, this is probably one of the better victimizations. Gabriella, or Gabrielle, I don't know how the Germans say it, she met her Romeo Frank Dietl in 1977. He was just captivating, charming, blonde hair, blue eyes, and a great stoic personality.

And the two embark on a whirlwind romance with Frank proposing marriage within three months, but claiming that his job obligations required them to delay the wedding for several years. So you can use that. That's a little red flag right there. Yeah. I want to marry you immediately, but it's just going to be a few years.

We'll just do a long engagement. What's your job? I'm a spy, actually. Yeah. Over their 12-year relationship, Gabrielle, blinded by love, smuggled thousands of secret documents from the U.S. Embassy to Frank, believing that she was helping him with his supposed humanitarian organization. See, that's, I was curious. I was like, why, what was his front? He's doing age.

He's just like, I'm trying to help. Yes. I'm just, and you can fix me. I will help the children. Yeah. You can fix me and you can help the kids. of the world. And so basically when the Stasi archives were open in 1990 after the fall of the Berlin Wall, Gabriel learned that Frank Dital was actually Dr. Rudolf Rek, a married East

German agent who had manipulated her for over a decade in her trial for espionage in 96. She expect one desperate question, did he ever truly love me? And the answer is probably. Maybe. Yeah. This is a crazy side job. Like you can't, like his main wife is like, yeah, he just travels for. work. So what does he do? He works for the government falling in love and smashing American chicks. Yeah, for our country. That's crazy. Yeah, kind of a dream job. Yeah. Do we ever get to hear, like, from his side? Yeah, he was probably like, dude, I love my wife and I love my nation. And I love my job. And I love my job. If you do that, you'd never work a day in your life. If you'd never work a day

and I like, yeah, what do you do? I plow chicks for a living. Yeah. For the greater good. I'm so good at Dickin. Yeah. That I'm like getting paid by the government to do it. He was a doctor. Yeah, literally. Damn, dude. Dr. Dick.

One particularly skilled Romeo was a theater director. He was labeled a super Romeo by the East Germans due to his numerous conquests. He was sent to Paris in 61 to seduce an interpreter for NATO's command center. The interpreter, a devout Catholic, fell deeply in love with him, believing he was a Danish intelligence officer. The Romeo convinced her to pass him top. level secret NATO documents, but her guilt over their affair grew. Desperate for absolution, she demanded, uh, she demanded to confess her sins. Ever resourcefully, the Romeo arranged for an East German agent disguised as a Catholic priest to hear her confessions. The priest assured her

that her actions were not sinful in that God supported her spying activities. Huh. Crazy. Wait, so she lied saying she was an intelligence officer for a different country. Basically, yeah. Well, no, because basically she was working for the West Germans. Yes. Like, we're doing the NATO shit. Oh, no, she was in Paris.

She was helping NATO in Paris. Right. And then this guy was being like, Nato's in Paris. Yeah. Also, all fuck is going to find me. Yeah. That's fire, dude.

We're playing it 20 times. Yeah. I mean, that's fire. But yeah, that's basically what she was doing, dude. She was, she was messing with the NATO's and, uh, And basically was like, hey, I'm going to help this Danish intelligence officer. Uh-huh. Because what's the worst that could happen?

Right. You know what I mean? They're with us. Danish. Yeah. These guys over in Denmark, they're good guys. And so she confessed her sins to a priest who was just his homie. Which is just like the ultimate.

It's a great setup. Right? Yeah. Like, I'm Catholic. My wife is Catholic. Next time we go to confession, I'd be like, hey, you should see this priest I've been talking to. You got to have, yeah, if you have the priest in your pocket, you're fucking good. Father Avery.

Yeah. You don't know. I got it. He's a good guy. It would be awesome to just be a priest, but just be just kind of like a gossip ho and just be like, you did fucking what? Like, you did what? Girl, you are just the worst. You are crazy.

Oh my God. You're like drinking champagne. Tell me more. Yeah, that's not a sin. Yeah. What are you talking about? Seven Hill, Mary is whatever. He doesn't deserve you anyway.

Exactly. I mean, while you're in there being like, by the way, you should just let him stay out. Yeah. You know what I mean? Let them hang with the boys. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I would do.

God is telling me that you need to let him join three more fantasy leagues and do the live draft. Dude, I've actually, I know someone that this kind of happened to in real life. They had a fake priest who was a homie. Similar but different. I knew a guy that was dating a Jewish girl. He was not Jewish. She was. And they had this long, long relationship.

She goes to Israel and gets really connected. with her roots and, you know, like her family. And she speaks to a rabbi. Just sort of like by, you know, happenstance. And the rabbi is kind of advising her and her faith and her role as a Jewish woman and says, you know, you really need to bring up your children Jewish. And do you have a boyfriend? She was like, yeah, I've been dating this guy a long time.

And she was like, and he was like, oh, is he Jewish? And she was like, no, he's not Jewish. She's Catholic. And he's like, that's going to be a problem. Have you guys talked about the faith? And she's like, yeah, he kind of wants to raise the kids Catholic. But maybe we could do like a hatsy hatsy thing. Yeah.

And the rabbi was like, it's never going to work. He needs to break up over. And he's like, anyway, my boy mortar back over here. Literally. So she calls up this guy, I know, and was like, hey, we got to break up. And then fast forward many years, this guy, my friend, he was like, damn, I just can't believe. Like, she talked to this rabbi and, like, kind of talked her out of our whole relationship,

like, through my world into a whole, you know, spin cycle. And then he says that to one of his Jewish friends. And then his Jewish friend was like, oh, the rabbi trick. And he was like, what? And his friend was like, yeah, yeah, this happens all the time. People go to Israel and, like, the dad sets up a rabbi that he knows. And it's like, hey, can you talk to my daughter? She's fucking around with this guy.

And it's going to be a whole thing for the family. So just talk to her about it. Just see what happens. And so then she bumps into the rabbi somewhere and then he just talks her into this whole thing and knows stuff about her life. And then makes it happen. Holy shit, the rabbi trick. So I don't know. You heard it here first, folks.

You can't trust, though. No. So I don't know if that's actually what happened in this case, but it's a real thing. My friend's friend was like, yeah, it's a thing that happens. So it happened in this case as well. You go to the Catholic priest and he's like, hey. I wish I had something like that I could depend on, like if I ever needed it to just call in a favor. Yeah, you'd have to get like, I feel like in your relationship, you guys are just like New York, you know, like cultured liberal type.

So you would need like NPR. Nah, not that, dude. Like, I don't know what your wife was. Except she's listening to Up First on NPR in the morning. It's like, Donald Trump has signed 12 executive orders, and also your husband needs to stay up late and play video games for four straight days. Exactly. And then maybe she was just, that's a great idea.

It's fake load podcasts onto your significant other's phone with subliminal messaging. That's a good idea. Exactly. So what happens with this Romeo project? Great question, Joey. By the 1980s, as the Berlin Wall crumbles and German reunification loomed, the full extent to the Romeo project came to life. in total, it's estimated that Marcus Wolfe's

Romeo spies seduced 40 to 50 women, many of whom were tried and convicted for espionage in West Germany. And while many of these women had genuinely fall in love, they were ultimately used as pawns in a dangerous game. Marcus Wolf goes to Moscow, but later returns to Germany where he sends us to six years in prison for treason, though his conviction was eventually overturned. I don't know if that's treason, right? It's two different countries.

Yeah, wait, Marcus Wolf was tried for treason? Yeah, he's the guy that put together the whole thing. Why was it treason? Because he was trying to subvert the West Germany's sovereignty, and when it reunifies, they were like, hey, you're a traitor. He was like, well, it was in a different country. Right. The East and West thing threw me off. I was like, they're just German.

Exactly. And, yeah, he ends up writing an autobiography, and he says this. The ends did not always justify the means we chose to employ, but as long as there is espionage, there will always be Romeo's seducing unsuspected Julietts with access to secrets. After all, I was running an intelligence service, not a lonely hearts club. So there you go. But really, maybe it's not the intelligence we gathered, but the hearts that we mended along the way. And that, I think, is kind of the big story here, right? Like, you know, it was beautiful time spent.

Yeah, right? Like, those memories, like, they might feel tainted, but you still got to have them. It's better to have loved and lost. Yeah. To never have loved and all. That's right. Right? I think that's in Shakespeare.

Romeo. Let's talk about Carl and Hana Koker, the Czechoslovakian couple who infiltrated the CIA. This one's wild, right? Carl Koker grew up in the heart of Czechoslovakia, Prague specifically. Checkless Slovakia, obviously, no longer really a country, but at the time. He was not an ordinary man, right? He was brilliant, ambitious, and capable of using his wit and charm to get what he wanted in the late 20s. Carl caught the attention of Czechoslovakia's secret police.

How did he catch their attention? They just saw him in a bar. They're like, you. You fucking smoke show. Get in here and be one of us. Immediately. You could fuck our nation at the top. You absolute stone cold fox.

He's just a stallion and they were like, hey, you're the guy. That's the stallion right there. Look, he looks nude in that photo. That's what it takes. Yeah. Fuck. He's like a Czechoslovakian Tom Selleck. Exactly.

Dude. Megnam P. Oh, yeah. After years of careful grooming, they saw him, and they saw his potential for something a little bit greater, okay? A mission to penetrate. Preach the CIA. One of the most secretive and powerful intelligence agencies in the world. So how do they do it?

In 65, Carl and his wife Hana were sent on a mission of a lifetime. They immigrated to the United States under the guise of defectors fleeing the oppressive communist regime in Czechoslovakia. Okay? Not all migrants, but some are spies. This cover allowed them to blend seamlessly into American society. It was a time when the United States welcomed defectors as trophies at the Cold War proof of the failures of communism. Yeah.

Hanna, with her striking beauty and charisma, began building her own life in America establishing herself in the diamond industry. Meanwhile, Carl used his fluency in English and his academic credentials to work as a radio announcer and eventually earned a doctorate and philosophy from Columbia University. Look at that, killing it. Their perfect dissimulation to American life. have culminated in Carl becoming naturalized US citizen in 71. Just one year

later, he passed a rigorous CIA screening process and was hired as a translator and an analyst. Wow. Look at this. Once inside... Hot guys just have it all, dude. Right? We saw a six foot three dude with a mustache and we were like, if he's not in the fucking CIA. And we always assume, I think America, we always

assume, like, once you are living this life, you've got a doctorate, you're on the radio. Yeah, yeah. You're in the... Like, how could you possibly cross us, we've given you all of it, and we have McDonald's. Yeah. Yeah, it's like you kind of get the whole deal. Like American culture is so fire.

It's going to go back to fucking eating goose and sausage for breakfast. Never. Never in a million years. And yet it happens. Yes. And it gets even crazier. So once inside the CIA, Carl begins feeding valuable intelligence to his handlers back in Chuck LaSlovakia.

He was assigned to translate, analyze, and basically decode highly classified documents, including reports on American spying techniques and the identities of Soviet double agents. All the while, Hanna played her role impeccably, dazzling those around her with her beauty and charm, but behind the glitz and glamour, the coakers had a far more sinister pastime. Would you like to guess what they did in their free time?

Were they swinging? They were swinging in New York City and Washington, D.C. Yeah. Come on. And it was at the original Polly couple. I love how, like, they are tens for their era, but they're like hard sixes now. Isn't that crazy?

people have gotten hotter. You would think everyone says people have gotten uglier because like if you look at a photo of people on the beach, everyone's fat and looks horrible because of processed foods. But I think the ceiling is higher. Well, here's an interesting thing actually. It's our beauty standards. I genuinely think that shift and we don't even realize it. Crestos, could you quickly

Google for me? Hollywood Starlets with modern makeup. This is a fascinating case. Oh, that's interesting. Because it's something that you don't think. Just Marilyn Monroe with a BBL. And you're just like, oh, you're just like an Instagram girl. You know what I mean? Yeah. So this is like a famous Hollywood starlet.

Yeah. With modern makeup. And click again. Another one, click again. And all of them are like tens today. Right. And if you could see. So it's just style.

We're just used to the style that we... So that's what she looked like in the time. And you're like, I don't know. And that's what she looks like with modern makeup. Yeah, come on. And keep going on more. Taste it. Yeah.

And so, oh, I mean... Well, now we're getting. I think that's just a nun. Oh, sister. And hold on, keep going a little more Forgive me, mother, for I have sound I'm sure some people like the previous look But yeah, the modern, I'm like, oh yeah, yeah

Maybe the hottest Hollywood starlet And also a genius Hedy Lamar Are you familiar with someone? No, but I like her name. I've heard the name, but I actually don't know I don't. She's a piece even for the time.

Yeah, sounds like she plays for like, like an NFL team cornerback. You ain't going throw on Hetty Lamar. But no. That's what they called Nancy Reagan.

Hey. Mark, come on. No, but she's a, she's a gym even in the club. And she also invented. She's nice, though. I think she invented, like, Wi-Fi or some shit.

What? Yeah, she was like... What do you mean? She was, like, an inventor. Like, she, like, was genuinely, like... Invented Wi-Fi. Yeah. She was, like, one of the people

that was, like, co-collaborating with another invention. And, like, created the, yeah, she was the mother of Wifer for invention of frequency hopping. And it's a technique that rapidly switches between radio. Sounds like a dance that they used to do back then. That's actually what the coakners were doing. Frequency hopping. Frequency, that's right.

All right. So back to these fucking sluts. So at these sex parties, they were, that they were operating oftentimes, that they were attending and both hosting. They were basically mingling. Huff cleanup. Not the ideal, like. You thought you were pissed when people, like, left a dish or, like, took a Tupperware. It's like, your wife squirted on my fucking couch.

That's insane. She popped my Faberjia egg out of her vagina. How quickly, like, when you go swinging, like, how quickly do you stop being friends with people you fuck? Like, I'm sure sometimes it sticks together, but, like, imagine fucking and then be like, ah, I don't know, we're supposed to do that. Yeah. And then it's like, then it's like, you can't have them over for fucking football anymore. Yeah.

The Postnut clarity is insane. Yeah. Because, like, then I couldn't even imagine, like, my wife comes back in the room and then, like, all my swinging buddies are like, tapped out. Dude, wait, what? Imagine the Postal clarity, you come first and then you're like, yeah, I don't know if we should have done this. And then meanwhile, your wife's still getting plowed as you have PNC. We don't have. I'm not built for this shit.

We don't have swinger brain. Like, I think swingers simultaneously get off. Not only. They like the concept of, yeah. Not only do they like being in someone else's wife? Yeah. They like that their wife is getting banged by them. Right, because that's kind of hot.

So even when they're done, they can still be like, oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm one gear. Yeah, they have a, we have a famine mentality. They have an abundance mentality when it comes to sex and orgasms. And I respect them for that. I just don't know if I can get there with this particular topic. But maybe that's a good thing because now you're not going to sell out our country.

That's true. Yeah, it's true. So now these people are mingling with diplomats, military personnel, and even other intelligence agents, exploiting the uninhabited atmosphere to gather confidential information. Hana's magnetic personality drew men to her, while Carl's apparent nonchalant and an intellectual persona disarmed those who might have otherwise been suspicious. This is, I think this is going to be a question that we end up at a lot during this episode

where I'm like, what percentage of them is great spies and what percentage of them love swinging? Like they might just, it's probably both, right? And what makes you such a great sex being our spy? Right. That you love swing. You gotta love both. That's what I'm saying. Yeah.

So love of country, love of box. One of country. And one of, love of boxed. Oh, nice. You can't spell country without bleep that. All right. That you get to monetize for that word. You can't say it.

Ah, I see. For anyone not listening, it is a good pun. Yeah, you should just add in a robot voice. It's like, you can't spell country without vagina. Uh, one such party go, or later recalled, that Carl would often boast about his access to classified documents enticing others to reveal their own secrets. In the middle of fucking. You dirty little bitch.

Give me those documents. Let me file those documents in your ass. Let me go looking for them. With the couple's unconventional methods allowed them to obtain valuable intelligence, including sensitive details about U.S. nuclear strategy. And where the clit is. No, they never figured that up. It's a little part of the bottom, I think. Anyway, incredibly, despite the high-profile nature of these gatherings, they operated undetected for years.

I should clarify, undetected as spies. They were easily infected. Everyone knew they were trying to fuck everybody. Well, yeah, because if you had a hand, you're like, I wonder if they're spies. People are like, how do you know? It's like, I don't know, I don't actually hang out. But they're that much. I never.

You heard with her? A little bit of shame goes a long way in the spy game. It's genius. So, while Carl was initially working for the Czech secret police and intelligence, his relationship with the agency soured over time. They grew suspicious that he might be operating as a double agent for the Americans and ordered him to resign

from the CIA. You can't trust a swinger. That's right. Like you might be, he might be country swinging. Yeah. Like if you're willing to let your wife get dogged out. Yeah. Who cares about Prague? You're letting your wife get fucked in the ass by the chief of staff of the army. Yeah. Like no one's trustable. Yeah. So after a week of

This is why you can't do this shit, dude. You end up staying up late at night. Freaking out. You're like, hold on. Yeah, so Carl really stepped in it here. But after a week of brutal interrogation back in Czechoslovakia, Carl returned to New York and stepped away from his role at the CIA, seemingly leaving the world of espionage behind.

And that's the end of the story. I like those. Scyke. In the early 1980s, as tensions between the U.S. and the Soviet Union escalated under Reagan, the KGB saw an opportunity. What is they do? To get ahead from Nancy. To get ahead of Nancy.

They approached Carl, urging him to return to the CIA. Despite his brief hiatus, the CIA took him back with little hesitation, allowing him to continue his work as an agent. We've got to be better at that. Right. Yeah. We've got to be way better at that. One of the girls he was banging is probably now high up at the CIA. Right.

And it's like, yeah, come on back, Carl. They always come back. They always come back. Well, yeah, or imagine it's a guy and it's like, yeah, let me fuck his wife. I'm for sure letting him come back and work for the company. That was definitely a part of the interview. They're like, how's your wife doing? Yeah.

She still looks good. Yeah, show me a pick. Yeah. So basically he gets back and he basically continues his work. However, what Carl didn't realize was that this time, the CIA was suspicious. What's up, people? We're going to take a break really quick because it has been alleged that I smell. This has been said countless times.

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actually nourishes your body and powers you for all the tough things that life might throw at you. Let's get back to the show. You step away, you take a hiatus, you go to the devil's the double. So, but. By November 1984, the life of luxury and intrigue that the coconuts had carefully constructed began to unravel. A tip-off from a defector alerted the FBI to Carl's treachery one morning. Treachery is crazy. It is treacherous. It is treacherous.

It is truly true. Tying you up and spanking you. One morning, the glamorous life of BMWs and mink coats and swinging parties came to a screech and halt as the FBI arrested the couple at their New York City apartment. Faced with mounting evidence, Carl confessed. Yeah, mounting evidence. Evidence of mounting Just a towel Under a black light

His like my bet There you got And yeah he basically confessed To passing highly sensitive Information to the KGB Including the identities Of Soviet double agents And details of U.S. nuclear strategy

The revelation sent shockwaves Throughout the intelligence community Which many of them responded I don't know what they're talking about Yeah, I've no idea What parties It's fucking crazy This highlighted the vulnerabilities

of even the most sophisticated agencies If a man like Carl Kockner Who openly flaunted his eccentricities Could infiltrate the CIA Who else might be lurking in the shadows? You know, I'm team USA, obviously, but I like them. But kudos, shout out to them, yeah.

Fun couple. Yeah, it was basically in the time sensationalizing the press In court, the couple's scandalous double life Was laid bare, no pun intended. Yeah. And complete with all the salacious details about the Swinger lifestyle,

he was sentenced to life in prison Well, Hanna was also implicated as an accomplice, but the Kokener story didn't end behind bars. February, 1986, two years after his arrest, Carl and Hanna were swapped. Yeah, they were. Not for the fucking first time. In a prisoner, in a prisoner's sex change,

sorry, exchange in Berlin as they cross the bridge in East Berlin. It's just a nightclub for them. Yeah. Imagine. They go back to East Berlin, and a gold Mercedes awaits them ready to whisk them back to their homeland. Hana now organizes seminars

while Carl retired spends his days reading or exercising in a nearby forest despite the whispers of suspicions that Nearby forest. This guy's awesome, dude. This guy is awesome. He just works out. Just doing pull-ups on a log. He just fucking does coal plunges and just chills.

God, he did it. Yeah. A gold Mercedes. And they live a regular life. years in prison to be a spy in America and sex spy? Do you think they kept swinging when they got back to Germany? Is it even, in Germany, is it even

swinging or is it just normal? I don't, these are questions. I wonder if they go back and people are like, hey, so you guys seem like a cool couple, you have a cool vibe. Yeah, like, and they're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. We don't do that. Yeah, whoa, we're spies. That's fucking crazy. It's like asking a comedian to tell a joke in an Uber.

Yeah, like, what? Yeah. It's probably going to a porn star being like, hey, baby, you want to have, she's like, bro, I'm an actress. Yeah. And then you're like, here's $80, and she's like 100%. Like, I wonder, I bet you he would do that even for like petty secrets. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Like, even just like, for like, where are my keys? Yeah. I can't find them. Or like a reservation or like a nice restaurant. Yeah. You want to bang my wife. Yeah. Come on.

Because at a certain point, like, if you know you can do it, you know? Yeah. You broke the seal. Yeah, exactly. So we got a couple. I mean, we got so many great ones. That was a fun when I enjoyed that. This one is...

I'm just surprised how few of these are, like, shows in Hollywood. You would think, like, this is a fucking layup, guys. Right. People love this shit. Sex, five. Sex, intrigue, Cold War era where we had a clearer concept of good and evil. Mm-hmm. Now, let's go and talk about our buddy, Richard Miller.

Dick. Dick. Which actually, I think, the name of my high school principal. Dick Miller? Yeah. That's cool. That's a good principal. They all called him Dick.

It's an ideal principal name. Yeah, it's like an all-time. And he was a great dude. Dick is a good name. Obviously, it's, you know, it means dick. But also it's like when you set that aside, it's solid. They're phasing that out, though. There's not a lot of dicks.

I wanted to name my kid Richard. You did? Yeah. But I feel like Dick Gagnon was tough. Dude, that's awesome. Dick Gagnon is great. That was a tough one to pull out. And then you just get your mind out of the fucking gutters.

Yeah, dude. All right. His name's Dick Gagnon. Rich Gagnon. Reshot the guy on. But this guy was not my high school principal. And if you make a joke about his sister pussy, I swear to God. I swear to God.

Yeah. Look, your mind out of the gutter. Let dick and pussy enjoy their lives and peace. We just named our kids after the place they were conceived. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. And what we want them to grow up to be. Precisely.

This guy, not my principal, but a different dude. Oh. Born in a working class section of Wilmington, California. 1936. It's got a bit of an Asian look. You can see it. He might just be fat. Yeah.

There's a level of fatness. Yeah. You just kind of look a little sumo. There is like a zeitgeisty thing that I've noticed has hit the internet due to one of Shane Gillis's popular jokes where I think people in a comment section would say he looks like he's making him at night. Yeah. It is crazy how that is just pervaded like casual.

Do you want to know one thing that is has, has. helped it spread is there a bunch of fake like Shane doesn't have a Facebook account and I've texted him these fake Shane accounts because they're so embarrassing. But these bots make fake Shane Gillis accounts and they repeatedly post photos of grilled cheese and say I'm making them at night with like six like emojis like shit Shane would never do. A million likes. They get millions of views, millions of likes and all these comments and then people being like, all right, bro, that's enough. It's just one bit. And I'm like telling Shane like, hey, get these taken down. He's like fuck this sucks but they keep popping up and then I start seeing the joke everywhere and I'm

like it's kind of working yeah no it's genuinely like I had a friend that said that in a group chat yeah I was like ha ha love gillis and he goes who what I was like how do you not know he's like no I love Chinese bot farms on Facebook I who is Shane Gillis I mean that's how popular this guy is just become like he's become like his jokes are now their own they look at Shane and they're like he's making them at night He's just become, like, his jokes become a light of their own. It's insane. I guess if anyone doesn't understand that, he has a joke about a family member with Down syndrome who makes grilled cheese in the evening.

I don't mean to be pedantic or, you know, make you feel bad. But the listeners of this program know that? They absolutely. I mean, if they don't, they should stop listening. I know, I just, you never know when you're talking to a microphone. A lot of dog is. I'm like, if I'm in a corner of the internet that no one has found before. Well, if you're a dog, I had Sean Gardini on my podcast.

All right. No, like. No plugging. It's called The Joey Show. Check it out. Anyway, so this guy, Richard Miller, okay, I don't believe he's Asian, was getting a degree in Spanish and then was later recruited into the FBI because they were desperate for Spanish-speaking agents with clean records. Okay. It was pretty easy back in the day.

This is both Richard Miller? He got into the cookie jar, brother. He was actually making them a night. He was not retired. He just loves a grill. He just was eating a lot of grilled cheese. I don't respect that. Yeah, he quickly turned.

into a disappointment. He's 5-9, 250 pounds, stroves with obesity throughout his career. His colleagues regarded him as an oddity, a bumbling unkempt to agent with a pension for spending long lunches at a local 7-11 reading comic books and even stealing candy bars.

Jesus Christ. It was rumored that he lost his service weapon, misplaced his FBI credentials, and use his government-issued car to sell Amway products from the trunk. Oh, this guy is ripe. Ripe for one woman to attack is what I'm envisioning.

Dude. This dude would be like selling cut code knives, you know, just doing all MLM. Imagine some guy pulls up in an FBI credential vehicle with a gun and he's like, you guys trying to buy insurance? Whatever the fuck Amway sells.

That's awesome. It's insane. His performance evaluations painted the picture of an agent who barely scraped by. How was this not a movie? One of his colleagues, a former FBI special agent, Gary Aldrick,

described Miller as, quote, one of the dumbest, most unkept, most unpopular misfits the agency ever hired. This is something that I didn't realize until I was in college. But no matter what college you go to, no matter what agency you're in, no matter what, like, high echelon of society you get to,

there are fucking idiots there. Yeah. And like, you would assume if you get to Harvard or somewhere, I went to UC San Diego. It's like a good school. And you'd think like, okay, it was hard for me to get here. Everyone here is going to be top performer, not the case. Have you heard?

There's going to be fucking dregs everywhere. Have you heard of the Peter Principle? No. This is a fascinating theory that basically states that people are promoted to the positions where they are no longer competent. I actually have, right? Yeah, this is a thing that you've probably seen at your job. You just didn't necessarily know the name.

But literally it's like, okay, you do good at like entry level. Yeah. And then you get promoted to like, you know, upper, you know, management or something shit. And then you get promoted again to executive, and that's where you're bad. You keep rolling until you suck. And they say,

everyone sucks at everything technically. Literally. Except for people on their rise. Exactly. And so you get a guy that's good and he's going to get promoted out to where he's bad. Yeah.

And then eventually just have everyone in their perfect levels of incompetence. Yeah. I think that happens at a lot of areas of life. I mean, it's jobs, it's fame, it's talent. It's like, this podcast in a lot of ways. It's comedy, for sure.

Yeah. Everyone's like, man, this guy's underrated. The second year rated appropriately, people are like, fuck that guy. He's an idiot. When I was getting a thousand views in episode, everyone was like, dude, you deserve way more. And then I get a million. Everyone's like, this sucks. So I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, bring me down.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Keep me in a nice neutral level where everyone's like, no, he deserves it. And it is nice when sometimes you see that and you're like, you know, that hurt a little bit. But hey, I'm not saying you're 100% wrong. All I'm doing is what I'm doing. What happens is what happens. I'm just trying to work hard. I've seen comments on, like, episodes that do really good.

Yeah. People will be like, this doesn't deserve this many views. And I go, I'm with it. Okay. Yeah. It definitely does not. Go ahead and phone the extra 25,000 people that push it over the top for you. And let's go ahead and make them focus on something else.

Yeah, I'm with you a million percent, all right? So anyway. Oh, he's a Mormon. Yeah, yeah, went to BYU. And I think he eventually goes on a mission, learn Spanish perfectly while studying Spanish in school, and makes them great for the agency. For the record, a lot of Mormons end up becoming great agency.

because they go to study on their missions and speak a perfect language. This is actually what I talked about on my podcast with Sean Gardini. Really? Yeah, the Mormon deep state. Oh, my goodness. And he's very dubious of the Mormons. No, I mean, look, have we talked about this? I've talked about this at length on this podcast, that I love the Mormon way of life.

Yeah. And I'm an ardent supporter despite not believing any of the doctrinal or dogmatic elements of the faith. Proof that you can build something beautiful on top of a lie. It's crazy. Yeah. I'm pretty sure Mary Kay, you're familiar with Mary Kay, the MLM marketing makeup company. I think Richard Mueller sells it out of its trunk. Literally.

Yeah. And it was started by a Mormon. Yeah. All of these like influencer mommy Instagram pages, many of them. They're good in an organization because they're used to being in an organization. Organizationalally brilliant. They're great at selling because they spend years selling the most vulnerable thing in their lives. And they happen to speak fucking Taiwanese.

And you get them to believe almost anything. So it's just kind of a went across the board. Yeah. I might be Mormon. I could see that. On paper. Have you watched American Prime Evil? No, I've seen it.

It's good, though. It's good. Is it about Mormons? It is. It's like a westward expansion show and you have kind of like the U.S. armies, some random settlers. And then like, but it takes place kind of in, of course, like the Shoshone and other native tribes. And then, but it's while the Mormons are trying to like take over Utah.

And it's pretty damn good. Don't ruin it. I'm not. I'm just saying it's good. I don't, I'm not a, I watch shit late. so I'm very spoiler averse. I don't give away. Well, if I get another stomach flu,

I'm watching the entire thing. Do it. So a psychologist evaluates him in 1982 and concludes that Miller was emotionally unstable and should be placed in a harmless role until his retirement. Despite all this, he managed to hang on, remaining employed by the Bureau for 20 years.

It was his combination of incompetence and desperate need for validation that ultimately made him a great comedian. One of the best comedian and also a perfect target for the KGB. which for the record if the FSB or any other intelligence agency

Massad, whatever it may be, is interested, go at comedians. They could easily recruit comedians. 100%. And manipulate me into... But the problem is we don't have any power or intrigue or know anything. There are dozens of people to listen to the show. That's true.

I could peddle any type of propaganda y'all. Yeah. Okay. So let me introduce you to a a woman named Svetlana Ogrenov Kievkova. Thank you. What a pleasant introduction. Agornikova. A gordnikov.

Can we get a picture of Svetlana, a Gordnacova? Yeah, I was going to, oh, there she is. I was going to say, good luck spelling that one. She is a charismatic, beautiful, brilliant Russian woman, with allegedly that has ties of the KGB. Svetlana, along with her husband, Nikolai, had immigrated to the United States in 1973. And by the early 1980s, she was deeply involved.

and espionage activities. But 1984, Miller's life is just in shambled. I mean, he's stealing candy bars. I mean, he's falling apart, right? He's reading comic books. His marriage has deteriorated. He's facing financial troubles. He'd even been excommunicated from the church

of Latter-day Saints for adultery. Feeling neglected. He was cheating? He was fucking around. Come on, dick. Feeling neglected and desperate, he becomes an easy target for Svetlana's seduction. She approaches him with a mixture of flirtation and intrigue,

promising him a chance at love, financial reward, and excitement. For Miller, this was a chance to live out the adventures that he had always dreamed of. Russian, a Russian chick. Literally. Okay. I don't even know if that's her. I don't think that's, it's a type. It's a type.

You get the idea. Looks like the type of lady who would have several smaller ladies inside of her. A, KGB Nesting doll. That's what they call them. Could you search spy at the end of that? And maybe that'll give us what we need here. Yeah, there we go. So I could see it.

Yeah. Yeah, okay. I mean, and also like this guy, you know, nothing to write home about. I mean, she's got a little vibe. But we don't even know what the body is, right? The body might be on revenge, so who knows? Ooh. Imagine she pulls up on you.

I kind of like it, yeah. You're sitting in a car all right. Well, not that one. No offense to that Spetlana, modern Spelana. It's all right. So there are a fair heats up. up and uh swatlana dangled promises of 50,000 in gold 15,000 in cash if Miller would just just hang out with her chat with her to the wee hours of the morning he bought that and

pass over some classified this way hot chick is like I'll give you gold I'll give you gold to hang out with me and just like share stuff right and uh he obviously should see this right like he should know what's going on yeah and he does oh Syke again. He hands over all of his information. Confidential secrets about, you know, counterintelligence. And he believed he could manipulate the situation to his advantage, thinking he was using Svetlana's sort of flirtation and relationship to infiltrate the KGB. Oh, nice.

So he was aware of, like, he was doubling up. He was like, I'll just grab some puss on the way in. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Look, everyone thinks I'm a loser. Yeah. Everyone is a whole point. How about I smash and infiltrate the KGBB?

And who's an idiot? Bring back a little bit of that. And then who's a fucking loser? Am I right? Yeah. So, what do you think happens? I think he doesn't infiltrate the KGB. So Svetlana plays him like a fiddle and expertly milks him for every secret that he could provide.

I'm sure he just wanted to be milked. So he quickly begins to, he unravels, basically. He brags about his newfound connection with the KGB, convinced that he was on the brink of launching a daring double agent operation that would turn him into a hero. However, his clumsy approach and bumbling execution made him stick out like a sore thumb. Things kind of got bad when Miller and Svetlana took a trip to the Soviet consulate in San Francisco in 1984. The FBI, suspicious of Miller's activities, placed wiretaps on both their phones and installed listening devices in their cars. By September, Miller's intentions became clear to his superiors when they intercepted information suggesting that he was planning to fly to Vienna, Austria, to meet with a KGB agent.

By the time Miller's ruse was exposed, the FBI caught him red-handed, giving classified documents to Svetlana, making him the first FBI agent in history to be arrested for espionage. So did he think he was going to join the KGB and be a double agent but for Russia? He wasn't thinking like, oh, okay, I got it backwards. He was thinking, I'm going to join the KGB, but then bring secrets back to the U.S. Why did he just tell the FBI, hey, I'm going to try this? Because he probably brought it to their desk and they're like, Miller, you're a fucking idiot. You're sitting in your car all day. You can't even be a Mormon properly.

And he like spits the snickers out of his mouth. He's like, shut off, dude. I'm going to show him. You don't know shit. I'm going to do what Spider-Man would do. He thought he was going to come home. He doesn't get stuck in a phone booth. I mean, this should be a movie.

Like, I don't know how this isn't like a slap-top. These are all movies. It's crazy, right? Either you or I even wanted to write a script, we'd be cooking right now. Dude, we are the real genuses of Hollywood. Yeah. And they just don't get it. They don't get it at all.

So he basically, uh, agents. He basically gets exposed and he argues that he was trying to flip Svetlana and use her as an informant. Obviously, everyone's like, you're a fucking idiot. And his arrest becomes a national embarrassment. Yeah. For the bureau. During his trial, the FBI painted a picture of an inept, overweight agent, which seems rude.

You don't have to paint a picture. Yeah, you just just look at him. I'm sitting right here. Yeah. Yeah. Let him cook. Oil paint or whatever. Yeah.

He's like, I'm not that fat. Yeah. What the hell? Um, it was seed oil. He was so hungry. Okay. And anyway, so basically... Does it make you hungry?

I shouldn't ask you these questions. Oh, it's a real problem. Because the seed oils, they think that they're satiating you and you're getting all these, like, fake, ultra-high processed things in your food. But it actually makes you hungrier. So it's why when you're at McDeasels, you can just put them back. Exactly. And you're like, I'm eating so much, but somehow I'm not hungry.

Or I'm not satiated. Yeah. And it's really all just a trick to get you consume more. All right. The beauties of late-stage capitalism. Anyway, Miller's attorney, Joel Levine, famously described him as not a perfect man and, you know, a bad FBI agent, sure. Miller himself tried to betray his actions as brave, albeit misguided, attempt to turn Svetlana into a double agent. He claimed that he was attempting to revive his FBI career by trying to infiltrate the KGB.

Quote, I felt I could do what nobody had done before. Infiltrate an active Soviet intelligence network, Miller testified. I had a James Bond kind of fantasy. Yeah, he did. He said in court, on the record, I'd come out a hero. He kind of got, I mean, he got close. It's worth the old college try. Well, he was found guilty of espionage and bribery

and sentenced to two consecutive life terms plus 50 years for additional charges. That is tough. While his case was headline news, the Ogor Rodnovics faced their own legal battles. Both Svetlana and Nikolai pleaded guilty to conspiracy. she to commit espionage in 85, Nikolai was sentenced to eight years, opposed released after sorting five.

Svetlana, who maintained her innocence, insisting that Miller had never given her any class of an information, that she was just banging him for the love of the game. Yeah. Received an 18-year sentence.

Just love big boys? Yeah. Pretty crazy. This guy, Lawrence Lawler, an FBI special agent in charge of the Los Angeles office at the time, subbed up the agency's feeling, saying,

it's a bittersweet victory. We've convinced, we've convicted someone of espionage, unfortunately, it's a former FBI agent. It's a tough look. Not great, you know? No, he just, you know, he reached that point where he's just trying things. You know, like sometimes you just get to a point in your life where you're like, well, things aren't working out.

So time for a big change. Listen, we've got to hit a home run here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Enough, you know, if I'm not getting singles, I'm behind. It's the ninth inning. We need to swing for the fences. And usually you strike out. Sometimes you strike out.

It might connect. And you might get a lifetime in prison plus 50. Yeah. All right, let me tell you about maybe my favorite one. And I don't even know all the details about this. Yeah. I just did like a sort of tertiary deep dive. And so a lot of this will be news to me.

But let me introduce you to Shi Pai Pooh. And that's been the episode. Thank you guys so much. I mean, you give it a try. Let me see the spelling. S-H-H- S-H-I-S-H-I P-E-I-P-U

Yeah, I mean, the only way I could take it is pay She-P-P-P-Poo. Which is not much better. Hey, what's that girl? All right, well, you're gonna, that's, okay. Okay, we'll see. Actually, I have to feel like this is a translator. I have a translator on our hand.

Yeah, so basically the winner of 64. This looks like an off-Broadway Shen Yun that'll suck your dick in the alley. This is the woman that broke up the Beatles, okay? You're familiar with that. She was a secret agent that destroyed one of the greatest mop-top groups from Liverpool. In 64 in Beijing, all right? at the French embassy, at their Christmas party, this guy Bernard Borcicot, a young 20-year-old accountant, newly stationed at the embassy, found himself drawn to this enigmatic striking figure.

She was dunking a basketball at the time. She was boxing for Algeria and had an untarnished record of 39,000 and she was also a 26-year-old. opera singer and actor. Her striking features captivated Borseco. Though her Adam's abs. All right. I mean, just the balls in this woman. She was dressed as,

though she was dressed as a man, there was this ethereal femininity. She was dressed as a man? I'll be honest, I don't really know which pronouns to use in this part of the episode. I think she pay poo are the pronouns. My pronouns are she.

She. So I don't really know exactly what it's saying. So basically this guy sees she strike and sees the striking features. And although she was dressed as a man, there was this ethereal femininity about him, her that set she, him, pew, apart from everyone else in the room. She is fluent in French with a knack for charming. The audience struck up a conversation with Borseco. They quickly formed a connection, and they started sharing tales of, you know, life and revealing that he taught Chinese to families of embassy workers.

As their bond grew, she began to weave an elaborate story, one that would entrap Borseco for the next 20 years. Wow. She claimed that she was actually a woman forced to live as a man by the father, who desperately wanted a son. I believe that. This revelation was shocking, D'Borsico, who had only been in homosexual relationships.

Mm-hmm. Here at last was the opportunity to be with a woman. Mm-hmm. A match made. Now, this is amazing. In heaven. In heaven, dude. Truly.

So he's gay. Right. But he wanted to be straight to some degree. Exactly. Given the time. he wasn't allowed to be free. Yeah, he's French. So we don't even know how gay he was.

Just a French guy. Yeah. And now there is this woman that has to live as a man. Okay. Now, at any point in this story, do we know, do he slide a hand between the legs? Do we know, like, what we were working with here? I think we're going to find out. Okay.

Okay. Their romance began with secret meetings and darken rooms. Which part of this that I'm partially concerned about is like, so, I guess this is now a masculine woman that he's like, oh, I get to be with this person. I still don't even really understand the genital situation going on here, which maybe is rude to speculate,

but I think it's probably important to the story. Because it's part of the story is the only reason I care. Right. So part of me is like, I don't, I think this, I don't know what part is real or not yet. Right. So we're going to figure this out.

The romance begins with secret meetings, darken rooms. She insists, I'm going to say shy for this Because I feel like... Otherwise, it sounds like we're saying she is a lady. And I don't even know really what's going on. Okay. Shy insisted on maintaining the darkness during their intimate encounters. Hmm.

Turn the lights off. Okay. Because of traditional Chinese monesty. And Borsook, mesmerized by the mystery, accepted these terms without question. He enjoyed the world's driest vagina over and over again in the dark. Yes. And as their relationship deepened, the Chinese government took notice. here was a French embassy employee

entangled with a supposed woman sensing an opportunity Chinese intelligence agents approached Xi Pei Piu to use this relationship with Borsico to extract classified information from the French embassy

Borsico had no idea that his lover had turned into a spy when Shai began to ask for embassy documents Borsico rationalized it as an act of love he nively believed that the information

that she handed about my work Yeah, like, someone really cares. He handed over information, okay? And just kind of believed that the information that he handed over, which included 500 documents during his time in Beijing and later in Ulan Batar, Mongolia, was insignificant, just a small gesture of devotion. But to the Chinese government, it was critical intelligence.

As Borsico was stationed in different countries, their meetings became infrequent, but their bond remained strong. In 69, while Borsico was posted in Ulaan Batar, shy surprised him. With the child. A four-year-old boy named Shy Doodoo. I'm not joking. That's the name.

Bro, I'm telling you. Shai claimed that this child was the result of their love born through an intricate process that he is. It would make sense that a butt baby is named Doudoo. Can you just find out Gris does? Is Shai Pay Pugh born biologically male or not? Yeah, did this, I want to use the correct, let's say she, she's saying she's a lady, right? So for now, did she, if she wasn't capable of doing that the old-fashioned way, did she just snatch up a Chinese baby? I understand what this is.

This is a man that was born a man that lied about being born a woman, I think. I see. But it is a little confusing. So he's born a biological male. Okay. And pretends to be a woman. But is pretending to be a woman that is pretending to be a man. Yes.

That is a little trick. Now, this guy, Borsecoe, is a gay guy who's like, finally. I could be with a woman that's actually a guy. It would have been so easy if they just removed one lie. And it's like, yeah, you're gay. I'm a dude. Let's fucking get it. Right?

I'm wondering if maybe there's a part of the story that we're getting all mixed around. But basically, yeah. I mean, make. Oh, wow. Yeah. here we go. Could you read that? The French doctors sent to examine Pay Pew discovered he created the appearance of having female genitalia by making his testicles ascend into his body cavity and tucking his penis

back. The old mangenia. Works every goddamn time. Wow. I mean, what are the odds? Okay. Oh, tucking it back. So I think we can say he. I think so. I mean, this is what it's saying here. Yes, I think we can say he. I mean, I wouldn't want to misgender a someone sucking their genitals, their testicles into their body and tucking their dong back. Yeah. So literally, I love how the dark room just fixes that. I mean, this guy was so gay that he was like, wow, vagina.

That's exactly what I like. What are the odds? It's perfect. I'm straight this whole time. Yeah. Isn't that crazy? So basically, she proposes him, shy, excuse me, surprises him with a child, or surprises him with a child,

four-year-old boy named Shy Doudou. Shai claimed that his child was a result of their love, born through an intricate process that he insisted Borsico would never understand due to the mystical ways of Chinese tradition. Desperate to believe that their love had produced a son, Borsico accepted Shai's story without question. He took the boy into his heart feeling that this was the ultimate proof of Shai's femininity.

In truth, Shai Dhu was an adopted Uyghur boy from China's Xinjiang province. Damn, the Uyghurs has been getting the short end of the stick forever. Right, the shitty end of the stick. And then he takes him, and now we have Uighers in Paris. It always comes back. Balsam, tight motherfuckold's more flying. French doctors tasked with examining shy to confirm the gender discover the truth. Biological male and his ability to mimic female genital.

it was an elaborate deception, as we've previously explained. The explanation stunned the medical professionals that, you know, this technique of, I mean, tucking, which is now what all drag queens do, created the illusion of female anatomy during the encounters with Borsoco. When faced with this revelation, Borsoco was devastated. The man... It's just square one. Although I guess the child is the... Yeah.

And all the secret documents. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The man he had loved for nearly two decades was not only... only a spy, but also not a woman that he believed him to be. Can we find out if Borseco was gay? That would actually be a helpful. I thought it said that. That's what the research here is saying, but part of me wonders if that's how true.

I wonder if that was just a covert sort of suppressed feeling. Yeah. So apparently it says here. Embraced his own bisexuality. Yes, having liaisons with women and also engaged with a Frenchman named Tiari. Yes. and then, you know, formed a family with a shy P-P-Pu. Shaipebue.

Which kind of sounds French in a way. It does. Yeah. A Pipee. Oh, that's tough, though. Yeah, your whole life ends up being a lie. Crazy, right? 20 years of this.

So, overcome a shame, disbelief, and a sense of betrayal. Borsico attempts to end his life. Cutting is, I don't even know if we can say this by getting to monetize, but putting a necklace of razor blades around his head. Whoa, that's a way to do it. Yeah. While he's in jail. Miraculously, he survives. He told he went to jail.

Yeah. Eventually, both men were convicted, each sentenced to six years in prison, and put in the same jail cell. And, uh, a wamp, bount, bount, bough. Oh, what you trying to say to me? They didn't put him in the same jail. No, that part was made up to the movie that we're going to make of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it doesn't end right there.

In a surprising turn of events, French president Francois Mitterrand pardoned Shai in 1987. Wow. Describing the case as this sort of silly episode that caused unnecessary tension between France and China, and Borsico received his pardon shortly thereafter and the two men were free. In the years that followed, Shai reached out to Borsico, confessing that he still loved him, but for Borsico, the illusion had long since shattered. Yeah. When informed of Shai's death in 2009, he responded with cold indifference.

He did so many things against me that he had no pity for. I think it is stupid to play another game now and say I am sad. The plate is clean and I am free. What happened to do-do? That's a good question. Yeah.

Can we look that up? Shy doo-doo. D-U. They probably just sent him back. Hey, you're going to camp. Yeah. Camp, Gag. Go into a wee year camp, unfortunately.

Oh yeah, here, click what happened to shy-d-d-do? A lot of people have had this same question. And in our film adaptation, we're going to have to do this. Shy do-do still lived in France, but not much is known about it. Hey, good. Hopefully, a good life in France. What a crazy story that would be. That'd be tough.

Who are your parents? Yeah, but that's the thing is it's like, on the one hand, I'm like, oh, now that's fucked up. I was trying to positive spin it. I was like, you know, they weren't actually his parents. And he's like, yeah, but I was a child and Borsico raised him, right? I don't know. I actually don't know who ended up bringing up young doo-doo.

But, I mean, just an insane story. Great rap name, though. What's up, guys? We're going to take a break really quick because I want to help you make sports more fun. That's right. If you like watching sports, there's a way to make it 10 times more fun,

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All right, we got another one. This one's quite the story. This was a British civil servant by the name of John Vassal. And he had a secret life which made him one of the most notorious victims of KGB sexpionage. 1952, John Vassal,

young eager clerical officer was assigned to the British embassy in Moscow working as a part of a naval attach staff. For Basal, life in Moscow was both an escape, but in exile. He found himself isolated by the rigid class structure and snobberies of the

diplomatic world. Yet his loneliness was amplified by an even more significant secret. Do you have any guess? He liked butt stuff. Gay! He's a gay guy. In 1950.

That's a tough hand. Yeah, I wonder if being more open about sexuality has cut into the sexpionage business because the secret gay was like, that's your wheelhouse, that's what you want. Not only can we just seduce him, but now he can't even tell anyone at all. So it seems like gay rights.

Real back door into the country, you know what I mean? But it's good for intelligence and keeping our secrets close. Yes. You know what I mean? So he's in Russia and he's gay. Not the best time. Now it's still kind of tough. Wrong place, wrong place, wrong time.

Yeah. 1950s, being gay is illegal in both Britain and the Soviet Union, which I'm pretty sure it's still illegal in Russia. I don't know. Look into it. Crazy they had so many plays. Right? It isn't insane.

You guys have had theater forever. It's gay. It's illegal to be gay in Britain. Chikovsky. Right? Like the greatest ballets of all time come from Russian, like, artists and writers. Yeah. They watch a ton of women's basketball.

I mean, like, there's a lot of. Well, and then they even said. in a press conference recently. Like, you know, there's actually no gay people in all of Russia. I'm like, you guys invented the track suit. Yeah. You guys invented like a sweat set. You know what I mean?

There's got to be a couple gays over there. No gays. No, you guys. No, there's gays. There's gay clubs in Russia. Because I saw they did like a raid of like the gay clubs. Okay. But they have gay clubs.

Former used to be. They used to be gay. Straightened them up. Yeah, they just put in a bunch of flat screens and some boneless wings. No, there's gay people in Russia. They killed them, I'm pretty sure. Yeah. It's like, well, okay, yeah, it's a past tense thing.

If they rated it, can't imagine. That's not. If you're gay in Russia, good luck. Sorry. Come over here. Come on over. You love it. Yeah, be like an asylum seeker.

Yeah. Be like, hey, I just, I'm a refugee. Yeah. And I'm just trying to live my life. Yeah. Just pull up with some paupers and a JBL. They'd be like, you're trying to come to a man. I actually understand.

Come on in. And also, if you look like the guy from Rocky. You look like the bad guy from Rocky. they'd be like, yeah, you're a lock. Yeah. You're going to do great here. So he's having a bad time, okay? So one evening, October 1954, Vassal was invited to this opulent party by a Polish friend named Michalski.

The night was filled with laughter, drinks, and a sense of camaraderie that Vassal craved for. He needed this. Little did he know that night would change his life forever. As the evening progressed, Vassal, under the influence of alcohol and MDMA. Really? No, not that part. But a lot of alcohol and listening to Charlie X-C-X, okay? Yeah, he's just having a brat.

Yeah, he's just trying to listen to Club Classics, right? He gets seduced by several, several. Jesus Christ. Handsome young men. Yeah. Yeah. So he goes from being in pure isolation and having a bad time. Yeah.

To now getting hit on by numerous. Just fucking shirtless. Which, that's a crazy task also. I wonder if the Russians arrest gay guys for being gay. And they go, do you want to get your sentence overturned? And they're like, we're actually enjoying prison. And they're like, no, no, no, no. You're going to get you out of here.

Unbeknownst to him, hidden cameras were clicking away the entire time, capturing every compromising moment. This wasn't just any party. It was a KGB honey trap. Cue of the lights. Oots, oots, oots, oots, oots. Yaws. Had two guys pop out from under the table. The KGBs.

Wipe their mouths off. Just keep going. This is where it gets bad, okay? Days later, Vassol is confronted with the photographs. He's like, oh, fuck. Tough. That'd be the worst thing with a bad hangover to just get confronted with the photographs. You got a pediolate, and they're like, oh, look what we saw.

Yeah. Damn, I'm going to get murdered. KGB agents laid out his options. They sit them down at a table, right? They say, hey, look, either you can be a spy for the Soviet Union, or you can go back to England. Where it's illegal. we're going to send these pictures there and you're going to get arrested in your entire life and family and everything you ever worked for gone on a flash so choice is yours so living in a time where literally his sexuality could destroy his career reputation and freedom he felt he had no choice but to cooperate that's tough so the demands sort of you know they start gradually okay he's instructed to pass along I wonder if he was like so as far as assignments go can I do one of these like gay things that we just did yeah and like can I just eat someone can I keep gang my way up the ladder

and just, you know, at least catch a couple dongs on my way out? Can we do like an MLM? Yeah, I'll get three gay guys. And those three gay guys will get other gay guys. Yeah, multi-level men agency. Let's do this, exactly. So, he's instructed to pass along some mundane information, okay? So just yeah, just give

some info. Who cares, right? Earth. But as time went on, the request to become a little bit bolder. He soon found himself photographing and handing over classified documents concerning British naval offenses, radar systems and warship blueprints. That's not very nice.

His secret life as a spy began to take on a twisted sense of normalcy. His espionage career took off when he returned to London. Funny way to put it. His espionage career took off. Finally, I'm getting all the jobs that I want. Yeah, I'm snitching on Churchill.

Yeah, she was great. Look at everything that's turned around for me. And so he goes back to London in 1956 and the KGB knew that they had a valuable asset. They were determined to exploit him to the fullest. He resumed work in the Admiralty, the heart of British Naval Intelligence, where he gained access to some of the country's most sensitive secrets, blueprints for all the radar systems, anti-submarine recruitment, naval strategies, etc. Fassau's cooperation with KGB wasn't without its rewards. He was showered with gifts, cash, and even luxury items that would soon be impossible for someone of his official salary to afford. Soon his lifestyle

became the envy of his colleagues He moved into a lavish apartment In Dolphin Square Owned 36 Seville Row suits And took luxury holidays abroad To anyone who asked He attributed his newfound wealth To an inheritance from a distant relative

Someone died I had like an uncle With a lot of money Yeah I love that they're paying him well That's like so funny They're like we have everything over you We could end you in a fucking moment

But you're crushing it, so here's some suits and shit. The fear here is, oh, you want to keep them happy. Is he going to be a double agent? A double, double. So he goes to the British and goes, hey, guys, terrible news. I'm gay. I know. Yeah.

Not great. Okay. But I'm now working with the Russians. Yeah. And I'm straight again. So. It turns out, yeah. I was back.

Yeah, I was trying to go in. I was trying to go in. I was trying to go in. I was going to infiltrate, pretend to be gay. And then get it on the inside. So he could flip and then feed them erroneous information and send them on fools errands. Makes sense. So not only do they need to give him a little stick, but they got him throw him a couple carrots.

Man, he likes both. Exactly. Yeah, specifically in that order. So he excels at a spy work. He's doing a great job, but living this double life takes its toll. Okay? He's meeting with KGB handlers in secret and, you know, all these secret locations across London, like quiet suburban train stations.

and the end of Vassal's espionage commere came career, came not from his mistakes but from the defections of another man. This is a through line that we'll see throughout this episode already, but also even in my conversation with Jack Barski, the thing that takes out most of these guys,

even if you live a perfect record, if someone else gets captured, they say, hey, you're going to go to life in prison, you're never going to see your family or any of your families ever again, or you're just tell us, like, a couple other spies. It's basically an MLM for out-and-spies.

Right. They should stop having group Zoom meetings. Exactly. They should fucking split these things up. Why are we doing the conference call with all the spies? Look, I know that there's other spies. I don't know any of them. They don't let us talk to us. Segment your information. What are these people fucking idiots? Yeah. So they didn't ask us. And unfortunately, he gets outed in a different way.

1961, senior KGB officer, Anatoly Golotson defected to the United States. And he pulls the Kevin Spacey. He's like, all right, you got me. I'm gay. They're like, that's not what we're talking about. Different thing. Yeah. He defects the United States, providing Western intelligence with information about Soviet spies. His revelations include hints about British naval officers working for the KGB.

Though the evidence was not definitive suspicions around Vasali, Vassal began to grow. KGB fearing that Galitsin might expose Vassal, ordered him to cease all spying activities, but Fassal, confident that he remained undetected, resumed his work. Flewled a little close to the sun. And it wasn't until another defector, Yuri Nosenko added to the mounting evidence against him that the British authorities finally acted. September 12th, 1962, Vassau was arrested and charged with gay. And espionage. When confronted Vassal knew that his secret life had come crashing down, he confessed to everything, even directing detectives to the cameras and films hidden in his flat.

The British press had a field day, painting Vassal both as a traitor and a victim of the circumstances, and there were sensationalized claims and panic of a quote homosexual network within the government prompting a witch hunt. Dude, the gaverment. Yeah, literally.

They're like the fucking, how deep is it in state? Yeah. The deepest state ever. The deep state, dude. And they were like, yeah, our government's controlled by gays and there's a gay network around the world

that's controlling everything. Gay panic, dude. Yeah. Which of all the panics, that's a good one. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like just like,

being controlled by gay. Yeah, it's like why all of a sudden all our government buildings are really well decorated. Yeah. So that's what happens with this poor guy, you know? I mean, it seems like he had a great. A lot of these people feel like they had great runs. Yeah, I mean, most of them. Like you're having a nice little time.

Eventually you get fucked. But like, you know, this dude's living large, getting treated well. Yeah. Getting away with being gay, getting nice suits. What's the craziest thing is that there are spies that never get caught. Yeah. That's the craziest part to me. As we speak.

There's no way that there aren't spies in our government, and we definitely have spies everywhere else. And they were like, yeah, I banged a bunch of people. I had sex with all the time. I got secrets from everybody. And never got caught, retired. Now I live in Sarasota. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Just living in Boka golfing every day. Literally. It's insane. They definitely do live in Florida. Yeah. I mean, just chilling. Yeah, they're like, I'm done. I'm done spying.

But is there a significant? other no, like are they living? It would be weird to have successfully lived a lie that you know you're going to die in a lie. Right? Like, they'd never be like, all right, I'm done. No, I think you do like a deathbed confession, which I'm going to do. Yeah. One million percent.

I'm going to tell my kids, like, I was never really a comedian. I was working for like Massad the whole time. Yeah. And also the KGB and also the CIA. And also U.S. aid. Yeah. I was working for them. All those.

I was that quadruple spy. Yeah. And I was also a rabbi that told people not to marry Catholic dudes. Exactly. All right, this one is interesting. Okay. This is about a guy named Mordecai Venunu. And he's a nuclear whistleblower that gets silenced by a honeypot.

So Mordecai Vanunu, not your typical spy. In 1980s, he's an ordinary nuclear technician working at Israel's top. secret de mona nuclear facility. He's meticulous, intelligent, deeply committed to his job. However, as he spent more time in the bowels of the reactor, he began to notice things that troubled him. He discovered that the facility wasn't just for generating electricity. It was manufacturing plutonium for nuclear weapons. Whoa. He's a little freaked out by this, okay? He's like, uh-oh, my worst fears are confirmed. Israel possessed a covert arsenal capable of producing 10 nuclear bombs a year. Uh-oh, that's a lot.

In an era where the world stood on the brink of nuclear annihilation, Venunu wrestled with his conscience. Could he continue working for a government hiding its nuclear ambitions from the world? Would staying silent make him complicit in potentially a catastrophic world-ending event? His moral dilemma deepened, and by 1986, he made a fateful decision. He would reveal the truth to the world no matter the cost. Equipped with a smuggled camera of Vanunu... guy.

It's a tough one. He captures undeniable evidence of Israel's nuclear weapons program. After secret photographing of the facility's interior, he fled the country, went to Australia where he sought sanctuary. Despite his best efforts, the new, new struggle to find anyone willing to listen to his story. His breakthrough finally came when he contacted the Sunday Times in London, one of the few outlets that grasped the gravity of the revelations. It seems like most people would have been able to grasp that.

You'd think. Right. If he's like, hey, I have a secret nuclear program. Other people don't want to mess with it. I guess. I don't know, brother. I barely feel comfortable even talking about the story. Why?

I mean, it's just a whole thing. You know? Come on. It's out there. It's on Wikipedia. This guy's alive. They'll come for him, not you. Inshallah.

Yeah. Okay. So, despite his best efforts, he has a hard time finding everyone, and then he finally finds his paper in London. Vanunu, however, was unaware that his every move was being tracked by one of the most powerful intelligence agencies on the planet. shared his story with journalists Mossad had already begun

a covert mission to silence them, aware of his activities and determined to protect Israel's policy of nuclear ambiguity Mossad launched an intricate plan to bring him back. They needed a strategy that would be swift, effective and untraceable. Jewish pussy.

Not exactly what I would say, but yes. Okay, yeah. Enter Cindy, a beautiful, cunning Mossad agent. She was chosen for the job, operating under the alias, Cindy. She was the perfect bait for a classic honeypot operation. She's no ordinary spy. She's a master of seduction, deception, and manipulation trained in the art of luring targets into dangerous traps.

Got a spinnable dreidel. Yeah. Her assignment was clear. Seduze Fununu gained his trust and lured him into a trap that would bring him back to Israel. All right. All right, Cindy. So, September. Nora. In 1986, Vanunu stayed in London. Okay, he's chilling out there. Cindy makes her move. She plays

a role of an American tourist. A woman intrigued by Vanunu's mysterious life, charmed by his intellect. She listened to his story, shared drinks with him, and gradually coaxed him into believing that she was genuinely interested. Vanunu, who had been isolated and very lonely for months, fell for Cindy's charm. He believed he had finally found someone who cared for him. As their relationship blossomed, Cindy suggested that they take a romantic trip to Rome together. Overwhelmed by his feelings for her and eager for a brief escape from the chaos, Vanunu agreed never suspecting that he was walking into an orchestrated trap. Vanunu and Cindy landed to Rome.

He believed this was the start of a new life far away from the political turmoil. He had stirred up, but now with a clear, free conscience instead, it was the beginning of his nightmare. They stroll through the city's ancient streets, laughing, enjoying a great time, but Mossad monitored every move. That evening, Cindy suggested they returned her apart. And as they entered before the Nunu could even react, Mossad agents burst into the room, tackling him to the ground.

They say, hey, I'm Chris Hansen. You're on to catch a predator. He's like, what the fuck? You're the predator. What? That's crazy. So they inject him with the sedative, rendering him unconscious. His last sight was the face of the woman that he thought loved him.

Cindy slowly blacks out. He's drugged, incapaceted, massad agent, smuggle him out of his apartment and into a waiting vehicle. They had anticipated every potential obstacle. Their extraction plan was executed with military precision. Venunu was hidden in a shipping crate, whist away to a waiting ship and transported back to Israel. Back in Israel, he's charged with espionage and treason.

His trial is conducted in secret away from the eyes of the world. And Israeli government was determined to make an example of him. He's sentenced to 18 years in prison and spent a staggering 11 years in solitary confinement. Oh, Lord. And, man, that's brutal. 11 in solitary? Yep. And as a result, to this day,

no one knows about Israel's potential and nuclear capabilities. Except for the listeners of this program. Wait, did I say that? Oh, fuck. Oh, shit.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Damn, my bad. So he's still in jail, then, I imagine? Oh, this is in the 80s, so he might be out. Okay. I don't know what happened to him

to this day. God damn, Vanunu. Yeah, you get it, right? That's tough. I mean, it's kind of funny to be like, I've blown a whistle on a budding nuclear power that we know has, you know, famous intelligence capabilities.

And, but damn, this chick's kind of eyeing me at the bar. Yeah. You know what I mean? Might have to give me a piece of that. Turns out, 2004, he's released from prison, and but his life is severely restrict. He's not allowed to travel or talk to journalists. And he's been arrested in prison several times

for violations of those arbitrary restrictions on his right to freedom of expression and movement. So tough shake for Venunu. But that's what you get for trying to do. Trying to sell out your country in a way. It's kind of tough. I mean, like, yeah, there's an emotional conflict there because you're like, the good of humanity

oftentimes requires you to let people know when you think something bad is happening, but also if your country is developing a nuke, they have a right as a nation to come for that ass. Right? So it's kind of, you know, it happens. It's a tough one. We got another one.

All right. This one, I think is, I think for the good guys. I think. Okay. Do you want me to decide at the end? Yeah. Martha Dodd, an American socialite that infiltrated Hitler's inner circle. I kind of have a lean.

So, Martha, all right? Let's get a picture of Martha. That'll actually be helpful. She arrives in Berlin in 1933 with her father and brother, right as Adolf Hitler rises to power, As the ambassador's daughter, she's thrust into Nazi society, quickly gaining access to the most influential figures of their regime. Martha's beauty and vivacious personality draws the attention of numerous high-ranking officials. She soon found herself involved in romantic entanglements with several prominent Nazis, including Ernst Hans Fengalt, a close confidant of Hitler, and Ernst Udette, a celebrated Luftwaffe pilot in Rudolf Dalles, the first head of Degas.

The spy queen was a nympho. She turned out to be a nympha Yeah, girl Come on Martha It was a different time Yeah Among these men Martha's most notorious fair

You know there Trains run on time That's what happens Yeah Browns Some hot showers Yeah Yeah

We're doing it dude The brown shirts Woof This shit was white When I bought it Yeah Come on now So

Her most notorious affair Was with this guy Rudolph Dils The head of the secret police, the Gestapo. The red hosed reindeer. Yeah. And he was hanging, dude.

Yeah. He's a dangerous man with reputation for ruthlessness. But he takes Martha into his world, revealing the dark, hidden mechanisms of the Nazi regime. I was intrigued and fascinated by this human monster, Martha later recalled. Girls love bad boys. Yeah. It's crazy.

Yeah. Like, she looked at a Nazi and was like, he's been killing people, but he fucks different. And I can fix him. Yeah. Like, he just needs, like, yeah. Support. Yeah. And like someone that can, like, have his back, and he's actually a great guy.

Yeah. Sure. Sure. Work is stressful. Yeah. Yeah. Sure, he wants to kill all the Jews. Right.

But he's a good, deep down. If you knew him the way I knew him? Yeah. So, despite her fascination with Nazis, Martha began to feel uneasy about the regime in 1934 during the night of the long knives, as some people may be familiar with, when Hitler's purge of his political rivals led to the murder of hundreds, including many of the men Martha had socialized with, this is. This moment opened her eyes to the true nature of the Nazi regime. We all have a moment. Yeah. Are you killing all my exes, dude?

Are we the baddies? Yeah. You know, like that kind of, that kind of a little shift. And so she begins to feel her loyalties changing place. In the midst of her growing doubts, Martha encountered this guy, Boris Vennogradov, a charming, intelligent Soviet diplomat stationed in Berlin. Boris, an agent of the NKVD. Okay.

No, they're not in Paris. before even try to do that one again. Fucking dastardly dog. This is basically the predecessor of the KGB was immediately captivated by Martha. So now Martha's getting teed up by the Soviets. People love this girl.

So they used to make Martha's different. Right? The Marthas we have today. Not, absolutely not. Don't hold up. But back in the day, Martha was like a... Damn. Unlike the Nazis that she had met, Boris was a sophisticated worldly

and full of passion for the ideals of communism. and didn't want to kill really that many Jews. Yeah, not even, not nearly as many. He was down with sharing that pussy, bro. Communist ass. So, he painted a picture of the Soviet Union as this land of equality, justice, and hope. Start contrast to the oppressive fascist regime

that Martha is now kind of inside. So Boris and vice versa. Yeah. So Boris recognizes Martha's potential as a spy, begins to court her, not just as a lover, but as a prospective asset for Soviet intelligence. As the relationship deepened, he persuaded Martha to share secrets from her father's work in the Nazi's circles she frequented. She was swept in the romance of it all, believing she contributed to a greater cause, one that would counteract the horrors of the Nazi regime. In one of her letters to Boris,

she confess this, quote, you mean more to me in my life than anybody else. I'm willing to help you as you ask. You know I'm willing to come. Yeah. When called. What's up, guys? We're going to take a break really quick because I've got to tell you about an amazing service known as Blue Chew. That's right.

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That's right. Blu-choo.com. Use the promo code Gagnon. Check it out. Bluechu. Let's get back to the show. In 1936, Martha was fully committed to the Soviet cause, passing on sensitive information from her father's diplomatic cables

and the social gatherings she attended. Her actions did not go unnoticed by Soviet intelligence. Her reports quickly rose to the highest echelons of the Kremlin. Even Joseph Stalin himself took an interest in Martha's lovely letters. Recognizing her as a valuable asset with unparalleled access to the inner workings of both the American embassy and the Nazi elite. So far, this seems like, you know, she's going against the Nazis. She found her lane.

She found her lane, the Soviets. She's going Soviet, though, because, you know, which we were working her back then. We're cool with them. But, you know, as an American embassy daughter, not ideal. You could have just been with the boys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's okay. Yeah.

So despite the excitement of her double life, Martha struggled with the burden of secrecy. She continued her affair with Boris all while juggling relationships with other men who had no idea of her clandestine activities. Yeah. She wrote romantic letters, attended these parties, played the role of this carefree diplomat daughter, yada, yada, yada, all the while collecting intelligence. for the Russians. The information Martha provided, you know, proved to be invaluable to Soviet intelligence,

but her life was about to take a dangerous turn. 1937, her dad decides to resign from his position as ambassador, says, you know what? This whole Germany thing's really getting kind of crazy. This Hitler guy's kind of pushing me a little. So 1937, he decides, let's get out of here.

Yeah. Let's go home, chill. Back in the U.S., Martha wasted no time rekindling her passion for espionage. She moved to New York City where she reconnected with so. Her passion is crazy. She's like scrapbooking and spying.

Yeah. I'm sorry. Spying was on my vision board. Yeah, I just love secrets. It does sound fun. It is sort of a womanly thing to do. Is it? It is.

It really, like, if you're a guy and you're a spy, I feel like they dabble off. But that's what makes a perfect spy? Right. Because what do girls love? They least expected. They love tea. They love gossip.

They love chit-chatting and details. You know what I mean? Yeah. So what job is better for a woman? If you're a guy and you're a spy? That is true. a guy and he'd be like, oh, I don't know, dude. Yeah, I'd be like, yeah.

They'd be like, oh my God, the paper that they wrote these documents on are unreal. The guy's like, Jesus Christ, just. Yeah. Handwriting, by the way, faceless. Yeah. And they'd be like, what, you remember the handwriting? Yeah, I remember everything. I know every single take. Yeah, all right, Martha.

So back in the U.S., she gets back involved. She duts off the old cleats and says, you know what? Put me back in, coach. And the new mission is clear. Infiltrate American circles of influence and gather intelligence for the Soviets again. Damn it. Come on. I take back what I said.

I thought she was working for us, but turns out she's a two-time-in bitch. Yeah. During this time, she met this guy, Alfred Stern, a wealthy real estate investor and fellow sympathizer of communist ideals. The two get married in 1938, and together they form a new team for Soviet espionage. Stern, who became known as the Red Millionaire, funded various left-wing causes and provided a cover from Arthur's activities under their seemingly glamorous lifestyle the couple was actually passing information to the Soviets, even attempting to recruit others into the spy

network. But the couple's activities did not go unnoticed. The FBI began to monitor their movement, suspecting them of espionage. The political climate, the U.S. grew more hostile towards communism. The walls began to close in. And in 1957, the House Un-American Activities Committee subpoenaed the Stearns to testify about their communist connections with the net tightening around them. Martha and Alfred made a desperate decision to flee. They went to Mexico.

Ugh. You got to tighten up your border. Mexico. Yeah, come on. We're not sending our best. No, we're not. You know, some spies, whores. Some of us. Spy whores. Spy whores. That's the most dangerous combination. Oh, my goodness. Yeah. And so they go to Mexico and then they go to Prague and that's where they get asylum. And then in Prague, they live in exile, cut off from their homeland and forever branded as traders. Viving and smashing on the blue de noob. Yeah, exactly. In general, we're just have a great time. It's not a bad life. You got to wonder, some of these spies,

They just go on to live like normal lives. You're like, that's pretty chill. It's pretty chill. You got it done, but I just feel like they probably have that itch. Like, I think it's tough when you were a spy to just like go golfing every day. You know, like you just feel like you're missing the thing. I've talked to a handful of spies at this point. Yeah.

And they all enjoy high stakes, adrenaline, like sociopath activities. They were already that way. That's how they got into it. Like there's like probably no amount of shit that would get me into being a spy. I would be too stressed. Bro, it's insane. I would be like, this is like really like fucking up kind of like my like, like I haven't achieved a flow state in a while. Because I just feel like I like keep thinking about like all the lies and like what could happen.

And I like I can't handle trying to like if I like if I went to like the airport. Yeah. And I bought something and they said, do you have anything to declare? And I'm like, no. You're. Do you? No. Yeah.

Why don't you declare something? Yeah. Do you fuck? I'm gay. Yeah. What else you want me to declare? Oh, fine, I'm gay. Is that what you wanted?

Dude, I remember when I was like, I don't know, I was like 15. I was flying to visit my grandparents and I was like wanted to bring weed and so I like put it in like the battery casing of a camera. Brilliant idea. That's smart. But I just like smuggle it. But the entire flight, I was like, oh my fucking God. And I'm like waiting for like the bags to come off. And I didn't realize people don't really give a shit that you fly with weed.

But at the time, I was very worried. I flew one time. Imagine if I was actually a spy. Yeah. I'd be like, dude, I fucked Kim Jong-un. These people are going to freak the fuck out when they find out he's been making me at night. Bro, I one time got weed gummies when I was in L.A. Yeah.

Bought gummy gummies from a gas station, dump those out, put the weed gummies in there. Brilliant. And then went on the plane the whole time so stressed out. Yeah. terrified, put it in my checked luggage. Yeah. I was like, oh, the dogs are going to sniff it. There's a, yeah.

Oh, my God. I land, I open up my suitcase, they're not in there, and I realized I left him my friend's place. But the whole time, I was like... Shouldn't have the gummies in your mouth. I'm a smuggler. I'm smuggler. Oh, the worst smuggle ever.

Did you actually hook up with Kim Jong-in-over? Is that just a bit? I'm not at liberty to see. Well, you wouldn't be the first one. Okay. Let's go to North Korea, all right? I love North Korea. Really?

I'm fascinated by North Korea. I wouldn't say I love North Korea, but I'm fascinated by it. You love North Korea? Is that a thing? Have you ever seen this? No. This is like a K-pop thing. It's actually sick.

I love it. Wouldn't that be South Korea? North Korea and South Korea don't get along traditionally. Really? That's a part of their tradition is what I argue. Yeah, it is actually. I'm a traditional Korean, so I hate those guys. There's a lot of hate in the Korean backlog.

Really? I believe it's called the Han. And I believe it is a specific, I could be wrong about this. But I believe it's a specific phrase that Koreans use to, to explain like generational anger that's based on traumas that have occurred to the peoples. So they don't love each other?

Not those two. This is a Korean heart. Oh, that's nice. Isn't it kind of cute? It is very cute. And so it's like, oh, that's why that emoji exists. I think so.

Oh, cool. Yeah, yeah. We'll start using that. So I believe it comes from, yeah, the Korean heart. You can get a picture of it. I got it from Squid Game. Okay.

He's like, hey. Yeah. Oh, that's Park G. Young. I love you. I like that. So I've been doing it a lot. It is very cute, actually. Yeah.

But this is a story about Korean love. 2001, Juan Jong Kwa, 27-year-old woman with a seemingly tragic past, crossed into South Korea under the guise of a desperate defector. Fleeing the horrors of North Korea, her soft-spoken manner and heartbreaking story, she quickly won the sympathy of South Korean authorities. She ended up going on Joe Rogan's podcast, okay? And then eventually on flagrant. And she was a beautiful woman, okay?

No, this is not Yonemi, okay? Yonemi was never a spy. She would never, okay? We think. She wasn't. We'd think. We think. I mean, I don't know.

After all this, I don't know who's... Yeah, yeah. I mean, you could be a fucking spy. It's possible. One, painted a picture of a woman trapped by circumstances, longing for a new life. She even told tales of hardship that she had endured, including prison time for theft. and fears of execution in the north.

Yeah, okay. All right. Yeah, what the hell? What the fuck? Dude, we need not Yomi. We need Wang Jong-Kwa. Yeah, that's a good place to park. Yeah, okay.

All right, let's just, this is getting off the rails. South Korean authorities accepted her story. Unaware that they were welcoming a Trojan horse. A wolf and sheep's clothing. Which I never liked because sheep's don't wear clothes. It's a wolf and sheep. She's clothing would just be a wolf. Yeah.

Right? Yeah. Unless it was like, fur. Yeah. Is it called fur? A wolf and sheep's wool. Which I obviously doesn't sound as good, but it's one of those things where it's like,

Won Jong Hua. That's one chung Hua. Yeah, it is. And, uh, yeah, she's a wolf and sheep's. Yes. And sheep's wool. And sheep's wool. She goes down into South Korea, okay?

And she's telling them this whole story. What they didn't know. was that Juan had been recruited by North Korea's National Security Agency before her defection trained in the arts of seduction, espionage, and assassination. Her mission infiltrate South Korea's military, gather intelligence, and if necessary,

eliminate high-profile targets. Whoops. As part of her cover, Juan became a public speaker, lecturing to South Korean military units about the evils of the North Korean regime. Her passionate ex-communist rhetoric and beauty made her an instant favorite amongst

South Korean soldiers. Yeah. All right. This is a familiar story. I feel like she's been getting turned out. I don't know what's going on. Using her charm and sexual allure, she began targeting South Korean military officers,

striking up relationship. It is a little familiar. Huh, yeah, the whole public speaker angle. Don't look into that, okay. It's a coincidence. It's a coincidence. Yeah. I mean, who's going to come back from North Korea

and be like, honestly, I fled, but it was pretty chill. Pretty sick. Yeah, man. Like, that just seems like... What's amazing is to give all these speeches and then in the back of your mind be like,

just kidding, it's fucking awesome. It's crazy to be North Korea and be like, hey, let's get this girl. Yeah. Send her to South Korea where she sees everything is, you know. Trash us. Yeah. And they know like, oh, yeah, obviously you're going to trash us. But like, she's like, dear leader, though, I'm with it.

It's crazy. This is recently. This is in 2000. Yeah. So as she basically moves herself around, she's having a great time. Everyone's happy. She's cool. She's using her charm and her sexual allure to start targeting.

I think that the only way to keep someone, obviously you need someone who's indoctrinated, which a lot of people in North Korea are, but I also think they're probably promising her like a fucking palace or some shit where it's like you can live like some real shit if you come back. I think it's probably all of that.

Yeah. And then I think mostly, they say, by the way, you remember your mom? She's a kid, of course. You remember your dad and your whole family? Well, right now, we have them inside a giant blender. It's a huge blender and it's got a giant propeller.

There's just a squid game zoo walking around. Yeah, exactly. And they're going to be in that blender and we're going to feed them. And if you leave, we're going to push the button. Yeah. And Kim Jong-un will drink. And we're going to put some protein in it. And we're going to put it on YouTube.

Yeah. We'll call Will it blend. Okay. It's going to be part of a big YouTube channel. It'll be called blending in in North Korea. Yeah, exactly. So if that's what you want to do, that's up to you. But just know that they're going to be about that.

Yeah, that's a bit of a family thing is a generally strong anvil to hold over someone's head as well. But on top of that, you can also come back and have a palace and everyone's happy. So, yeah, kind of tip to scales. A little, a little this and that. Precisely.

So, all right, great. We got a picture of Kim Jong-in. Let's take a look. Good-looking guy. That's what he looks like. Good-looking dude. Yeah, I mean, that guy, it looks like he's been drinking a couple families.

Anyway, yeah. Using her charm and sexual allure, she starts to target military officers, striking up relationships, seducing them, and eventually coursing them into releasing classified information. Yeah.

She collected sensitive data about South Korean military installations, weapons systems, and personnel all the while, passing yourself off as this loyal defector who's just grateful to be here. As she moved through military circles, Juan built a web of informants, exploiting her relationships to gather intelligence for her North Korean handlers. To further her mission, she traveled back to China over a five-year period where she would meet with her North Korean contacts to deliver the information that she had gathered. In exchange, she received new orders, funds, and most chillingly, poised. poison-tipped needles meant for assassination missions against South Korean targets. One of her most critical missions was to locate and eliminate Huang Zhang Yop, the highest ranking North Korean defector and former chief architect of North Korea's Juch ideology or Jukai ideology. I don't know which one it is. Basically, this is North Korea's

state ideology that emphasizes self-reliance, political independence, and economic self-sufficiency. This is the guy that built all that shit in North Korea. Yeah. And then he defected. Hmm. It advocates for the country to control his destiny without foreign influence and maintain a strong military, yada, yada. Right. They don't like that guy. They don't like that he left. So how would you pronounce that?

Juket seems Koreanish. Jus. Juj. That would be another. Juche. Just trying to juz it up a little bit. Yeah. Jus it up a little bit. She's trying to catch a vibe. See what the it factor is down.

Yeah, there you go. It's juket. Juke. We are looking at how to pronounce this word invented by the North Korean regime to designate an ideology of self-sufficient and self-reliance is essential about pronouncing it simply

Juche. He did the full recipe lady thing where it's like you just want to know how to make hot chocolate and they're like, chocolate is a special thing that has been passed down from generations. I often think about a cool day in my late grandmother. It's like, how the fuck do I make hot chop? Say the word, more importantly, I'm not going to take pronunciation advice from a guise.

It sounds like this. You would like to know how to pronounce it as a juchet. Ju-she. No, you just said it French. Yeah. If you'd like to know how to pronounce you with a French accent, it's juchet. If you've never wondered how to pronounce a word wrong, I got you. I got you.

So, this guy, Huang, right, the guy that defected, he's a prime target in Pyongyang. They want him. agents had made multiple attempts to kill him since his defection in 1997, and they finally found their perfect tool. Juan was tasked with tracking down Huang, who lived under constant police protection in South Korea. Despite her efforts, she never succeeded in making contact with him. As Juan continued her espionage activities, cracks began to appear in her carefully constructed facade. In 2006, after delivering 33 anti-North Korean lectures, military officials began to notice subtle shifts and her rhetoric, picking up hints of positive Pyongyang sentiments. Questions rose about her true

intentions and suspicions deepened as intelligence officers began to dig into her past. The point came in 2008 when South Korean authorities discovered that one had not only been seducing military officers, but also had been amassing a collection of business guards and photographs belonging to 23 high-ranking military and personnel. This revelation led to her arrest under intense questioning. She confessed to her double life as a North Korean spy. Wow. You dumb bitch. You just fucked it up.

You're giving speeches and you're like North Korea's bad. They suck. They're awful. And someone's like, yeah, and they're ugly. She's like, they're not all ugly. They're like actually pretty hot. Like, we all know Kim Jong-un's like the hottest guy. I wish I could fuck him.

I wish I could sit on that big white face. Yeah. And everyone's like, wait. Take that extra wide swin for a ride. They're like, what? You think he's hanging? No. No, I think he's got a tiny little dick.

Really? Which is, I shouldn't say because I really would like to go to Pyongyang, but I don't think I'm going to be allowed to go. Can we Google Kim Jong Un naked?

Take a little beak there. Oh. Okay. Yeah, so that's an artist rendering. And that has a, well, okay. That's pretty small.

Yeah. He's the Kim Kardashian. I like the Kim K. Whoa. Is that real? Oh, man. Dude, this guy's Chill as out.

That is the greatest YouTube thumbnail of all time. I mean, that one is just. Fired, dude. Also, hold on, go to one of the left, his half-brother from the New York Times? What? Yeah, that's real. Assassinated Malaysia? They assassinated him.

Damn, I was going to say, get him on the pod. Kim Jong-dose. They got him, though. No, it's his half-brother. What about the- That's Kim Jong-un half. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Kim Jong.5. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Click on the one right to the right of his half-brother. Oh, I just want to wait. Yeah, right there, click on that. Oh, my. You know what these guys need? What?

Hands-free fleshline. Yeah. Our greatest invention from the last episode, the hands-free fleshlight. Which is now a real thing. It is. We texted each other about it. Yeah, someone must have heard the pod. My friend J.J. Lieberman, a dear friend of mine and a very funny comedian,

purchased one and has been telling me about it. Actually? Yeah. I love why you just dropped his full name. He talks about it at length on stage. Okay. So I don't think he'll have it. He uses the hands-free flashlight.

I'm sure you're familiar with it. He has a funny Instagram series where he goes, I'm not a pervert, but. I'm not familiar with this? I was at the gym, and I saw a girl working out, and I saw sweat right in her crotch, and I was so turned on. And you're like, well, it's a little perverted. Yeah, it's a little.

But they go viral. People love them. Yeah, well, horny internet is a real thing to tap into. Oh, just the Goon Squad? Yeah. The goon squad, dude. The gooners. Yeah, the big time gooners.

Which now there's a war on the gooners. Is there? Oh, yeah. John Mooder. The no nutters? They're banned and porn all over the world. The no fabers have taken over. Yeah.

There was a gooner who was gooning at like a drive-thru. Yeah. A woman caught him and then he killed himself. Yes. And then they went to the drive-thru to celebrate him. A candlelight vigil where his acolytes went and supported the cause. The goon squad. That's such a, as so many things are in our modern society, that's such an almost beautiful, yet tongue in cheek and complicated tale.

Yeah, truly. And as I might seem like a gooner for the record. Yes. I'm actually a secret. You're a secret, no-fab. I'm a covert no-fab. You're definitely no-fap. Yeah.

Big time. I'm just an old-school guy. It's just crank when necessary, but it's not a lifestyle. No, it's reasonable. I think it's admirable and I think it's respectable. Yeah. You're not a full-blown gooner. You're just a one of the mill?

I don't do the chamber every once in a while, so I'm not walking around with a loaded gun. Yeah, no, I respect it. I, on the other hand, believe in seamer retention and even at times seamer recycling. Expand on seam and recycling. We're going to go to the next one, actually. It feels compostable. No. Seam of recycling is where if you do release your seed, you actually insert it back in your body, such that it never goes out of your body.

Is that a double spit? It doesn't matter how you do it. Okay? Why is that? Is that a cum spit swallow? No. I do an enema. Okay.

I do. I do an animal. Anyway, so what happens to Juan? Yes. She goes to court and she pleads for leniency. She just wants to be reunited with her seven-year-old daughter who she left behind in China. It's my sin to have been born in the north is what she said to the court. She faced the possibility of a life sentence or even the death penalty,

but her confession and cooperation under a lighter sentence of just five years in prison. Court took into account. Five seems light. Right? You do five years and then you get to live in America? You're like, all right. But then I get, I bet her family went Yeah, blend

Don't want to read that Yeah The court took an account Her claims of being brainwashed by North Korea Her struggle to reconcile her loyalty to the regime And doubts of its oppressive nature Her stepfather Kim Dong Sun

Was also, don't smile Was also prosecuted on charges of espionage The news of Wang Jiang Hall's trial Here comes Dong son It's all right D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-U-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-KU. North Korea denied any connection to her and called her human scum, accusing South Korea of fabricating the charges in the fame to North.

That's how you totally tell someone's hurt by a past relationship. She's fucking human scum, dude. I don't even know why you guys even, like, wasted space in your jail with that chick? You think we did that chick's not even hot. You fucked her? Yeah, we would never. That's fucking embarrassing, dude. Couldn't be us.

Anyway. Yeah. We got one more. One final. All right. This one's a short one. It's pretty interesting. Before we do this, because I know we have one final, but I was just bringing it up. Have you heard about, I want to say it was Eric Swalwell, a current U.S. congressman who they found with a Chinese lady spy. What? Yeah. I didn't know about this. I could be completely besmirching a man who wasn't, but I think, yeah. All right. Well, let's see.

Apparently he met like a Chinese spy in San Francisco and, uh, it's fucking her. So House Ethics Committee has concluded a two-year investigation over his alleged ties to a Chinese spy. So let's scroll down briefly here and let's take a quick look because this is going to be, I mean, this is wild. So they just said that in 2020, Fang, a suspected Chinese intelligence operative have targeted Swalwell and other politicians to gain national prominence, who had potentially gain national prominence. Fang had taken part of a fundraising activity for his re-election campaign. Swalwell immediately cut ties in 2015 after receiving briefings

from federal investigators. He was accused of, he was not accused of wrongdoing. Wow. So they caught him and they told them and he was like, oh shit, you're right. But I think he did get inside of her soup dumpling.

Let's scroll down a little bit more. The Ethics Committee investigation began 2021. McCarty says, Fang's justification removing him from the House Committee when Republicans regained control the chamber. Nearly 10 years ago, I assisted the FBI and their counterintelligence investigation of a volunteer. It's time to move on. Wow. For years, Maga GOP falsely smeared

me to silence me, he tweeted, lauding the community decision to close the investigation without finding wrongdoing. Wow. It doesn't say in that, so I'm going to Google, did Swalwell bang the spy? Says he did not share sensitive information. Okay, well. Maybe, maybe not. It does seem like it's circled, particularly in sort of like conservative circles, that he had a full-blown affair. I think that's the rumor. And they're just like going with it, running with it. But maybe there's a little something.

Who knows? But that's how easy it is. Like if you get 10 different sources to just say that, then it's like, well, I don't mean, you know, Axios wouldn't report it. But like I heard from Ben Shapiro. It's true. Reddit account. They say that Swalwell and Fang were extremely close and that she ran his campaign, picked his staff, and was as close to him as anyone. Damn. She was easy on the eyes and her entire purpose for being there was to get close to Swalwell and potentially seduce him. There are so

many knowns that point to sex happening, but it's never been confirmed and according to the committee they say that perhaps, actually no, they say that no wrongdoing has happened. They don't necessarily say that no doing happened. Exactly. Wrong now. Yeah. Okay. So it should be a smear.

We don't have proof at this time. If it's wrong to fall in love with a hot Chinese girl. Yeah. Then I mean, Bill bigger jails. Yeah. Fucking tie me up, all right? Put me in a finger trap.

She's walking around with that Chinese finger trap between her legs. Can never pull my hands out. I'm saying, dude. You and your boy? Hit it front and back. Yeah. We get all sorts of dudes up inside that drag. Dragging my gum around.

All right. This is rude. Okay. We're besmirching the good name of a regular... Christine Fang. We get a pick? Yeah, we should. Can we get a pick?

Just to see. Just to see. It's Shang doo-doo. Yeah, the whole time. Okay. I don't know how easy on the eyes. I wouldn't say... I wouldn't say...

my eyes are working a bit but that's okay yeah all right yeah all right yeah refuses to say if he had sex with China honey trap spy I a Chinese honey trap

yeah one of the one of their trickiest traps that's how they get it on the walnut shrimp I mean yeah I mean you can see it Also, he's not exactly like, they're working late hours at the office. You know what I mean? Yeah.

You get tired. You know, it's difficult. Yeah. I mean, there's, yeah. Easy on the eyes. Yeah, come on. You know, hey, look, no disrespect to, you know, the area that I hail from. But he's in San Francisco.

You know what I mean? You know, you, you, uh, we're all victims of our environment. That woman is. The San Francisco 11, all right? Let the record show. That's what we're saying. Anyway, let's talk about one final one. This is Christine Keeler, who got wrapped up with this little thing called the Profomo affair. You've heard of MI6. I have. You ever heard of MI5? Yeah, I'm pretty sure Eric Swalwa had my six that he was talking about. Talking about my six? Let her go. She's mine. Yes, MI6. What's MI5?

Am I five deals with domestic affairs. Am I six deals with foreign affairs. I see. Interesting, right? Yes. No, am I? John Profomo was the Secretary of State and a respected influential figure in British politics. You got to think, the Secretary of State.

He marries his glamorous actress Valerie Hobson. Let's get a picture just to see how glamorous of an actor she was. Yep. Not in an objective way. This is just us judging spies. Which men and women. Men and women. Men and women.

Men and women. Okay. Right. All right. Valerie. Yeah. I mean, she's a piece. Yeah.

I could get it. Yeah. 1961. Am I 10? At a lavish party, Perfomo's life took a turn that would lead him into the heart of a scandal that would change British politics forever, all right? At this party, there are guests, including Christine Keeler, a stunning 19-year-old model who exuded a mysterious and irresistible allure. It was a brief but intense affair. Kuehler and Profoma began a passionate.

relationship that summer, meeting secretly for a romantic trist. But what Profomo didn't realize was that he wasn't the only powerful man in Keeler's life. She was also involved with Yevgeny Ivanov. Guess where he's from? Another one. North Korea. A naval attache from North freaking Korea whose name is Yivgeny. Yeah. The Russians are fucking spying asshoes. That's what They just look around and they go, oh, we have the hottest people. Yeah. All right. Let's just bang everyone.

Yeah. Like, it's really not fair, right? Like, America. I've never been down the whole Russian path sexually. I feel like they're intimidating. Just Google, like, any. What? No, I'm not saying I haven't seen them.

I just, I've never been involved with a Russian lady. Which is great because I have, you know, not a fucking spy. Yeah. But everyone's like, they're so hot. And I'm like, I feel like they would eat me for lunch. Yeah. Which I guess is part of the appeal. Yeah.

Exactly. That's like the danger. I only want to be dominated. I mean, yeah. I mean, like Russian women are just objectively, I think, just... Yeah, but they feel like they're going to, like, throw a bottle at the wall after. No, they're crazy. Yeah. Some.

Some. Not to generalize. These fine spying whores. But some. Yeah. I mean, these you grow, they seem sweet. Yeah, they do. And cute, you know?

But they'll get you. The only stereotype that I've heard about Russian women. Brett has got to be fucking insane for this. I don't even... They're too old. You're backing my bags. Yeah, I mean, this is also a crazy place because, like, I mean, what? Like, a bajillion Russian dudes died in World War II and just left all of these women just horny and alone.

Yeah. Just sitting around. Just waiting. Leaving them there. So they have all these women. All of them. The hottest in the world. Tons of them.

And they go, let's send them around. Yeah. Like, you're not telling me Colombia. It's a natural resource. Columbia could be the greatest. intelligence operation of all time. Who says they're not? They might be.

I didn't make a phone call. Yeah. He was a Soviet intelligence officer, okay? And he's also deeply connected to the world of espionage. Mm-hmm. Britain is in the midst of the Cold War, as is, you know, most of the world post-World War II. And any possibility of state secrets being passed between senior British government and Soviet spies is obviously not a good thing. Rumors of the affair spread like wildfire, drawing the attention of M.I.

a British intelligence service. So what do they do? They investigate. 1963, John Profomo stood before the House of Commons to address the swirling allegations. He vehemently denied any wrongdoing. He says, and I quote, there was no impropriety whatsoever

in my relationship with Ms. Keeler. His words seemed to satisfy Parliament and the press. But behind the scenes, investigators were closing in. Weeks later, the truth came out. Profomo had lied and had indeed engaged in an affair with Christine Keeler. Profomo was forced to resign in 1963. Christine Keeler becomes a household name.

Her role in the scandal was splash across headlines. Kieler was vilified as the good time girl. Files released decades later, uncovered. This wasn't the first time Perfoma had been involved with a woman who was a spy. Jesus, dude. Back in the 1930s, this horn dog was entangled with Gisela Klein, a German model, and committed Nazi who worked with the German military intelligence, who discovered that Perfomo had made.

maintain contact with Klein, even after she became a known agent, raising further questions about his judgment. That's that good sex, dude, where you're like, I know she's an agent, but come on, what are I going to not? I'm not going to not talk to her. What's going on? So this just raised more questions, like, is this guy just a traitor? Like, the fact that he got seduced by two different honey traps?

Like, how is this possible? I think he's just a dope. He might just be a dirty, dastardly dog. Yeah. And, yeah, basically people are like, maybe this wasn't as coincidental. accidental as people might have thought. But maybe it was. Yeah, it could have been.

I'm interested by this because it's like, you know, we've had a lot of people today that had to find out that they were living a lie. But this guy's lie wasn't I fell in love with someone. It was like, dude, I thought I had game for fucking years. I thought I was one of the dudes, dude. And I just keep fucking spies. That's,

Tough. Imagine telling your boys. Like, you have to call your boys and be like, she was a spy. And then it happens again. Imagine you call and you go, bro, you're not going to fucking Yeah. Remember that chick that I brought to the bar on Saturday? Yeah, no, the Russian one. Yeah, yeah.

Also a spy. What are the odds? A real friend would just be like, eh, it's probably going to happen again. Let's go get fucked up. Yeah, right? Yeah, it's fine. You are who you are. I mean, it's crazy. We accept the faults in our friends, even if they keep fucking spies.

Yeah. Even if they give away all of our secrets. You have what I mean? What is a friend for? You can't leave a man when he's down like that? Exactly.

And then they start exposing. You just have to start fucking him and spying on him. They say all the stuff that the spy handed over. Yeah. They're like, yeah, and apparently like,

Steve's got weird nipples. They're like, why would you tell that? Why would you? Yeah. Like, why is that even a part of the espionage? You didn't need to tell him about me. Oh, fuck.

But yeah. This is how it happens, dude. This is how the trade secrets get around the world. I think this is a cautionary tale to everyone listening. If she's out of your league and you have access to top secret government documents, you're not, you're just not him. You're not built like that. Don't give her the documents.

Or if you do, worth a shot, try a double spy. Try a Dick Mueller and see what you can do. Yeah, exactly. And if you're a guy. Yeah. Or if you're a girl, to be honest, and you're interested in helping out our country and getting plowed or plowing. Either way, sign up. Just go to the CIA office and be like, I know you guys do the fucking shit.

Let me go do some fucking. Because right now I'm banging for free. Yeah. And I would love to bang to help our great nation. 100%. Because I bleed red, white, and blue. Yeah. It's a real medical issue.

It's a problem. My blood is too oxygen. Yeah. But I need help. Anyway, if your wife comes to you and says, hey, I've been given a task to protect the nation. You go, that's amazing honey. And she says, I have to be a honey trap. I would say, would you let our nation go down?

I would, I would, uh, who's our nation and why are they going down? The name of the target. I think I would, I think I'd go into the agency and I'd be, I'd say, fine, we'll do the swingers. Because if you're fucking, I'm fucking. All right? If you're fucking, I'm fucking. We're both fucking for this great nation. All right?

You don't get to do it alone. But I feel like you would bungle it, dude. I would not bungle it. You would absolutely bottle the whole thing. I'd be cracking these fucking. No, not the sex mark. Pracking these jeans. You'd do good.

Thanks. You'd be holding a girl and be like, call me spy. Why am I in a dark room with the Chinese man lady named Xing Peepu? And which side of this am I on? This has gone haywire. My wife's getting dogged out. Yeah. Why do we have to go spy on Nigeria?

Why am I tucking? Why am I talking? I'm getting fucked in the ass. Now I'm getting fucked in the Shangdu-do. They tell you like, hey, your first spy swing-in mission, you got to go to Nigeria. Yeah. And you're like, why do we need their secrets? You mean Algeria?

No, no, no, no. No, Nigeria. Nigeria. Okay. And then you find your target and he's big and he's tall and he's scary. Oh, I can't be just a nice Nigerian lady. No, no. No, you get to be with a beautiful Nigerian lady.

Oh, yes. But then your wife. Yeah, yep, yep, yep. Well, that's... Has to learn about Ubbo's big old secret. Well, you know, I would just... I'd have to make my way through the village. I'd have to have a few assignments with many of the lovely ladies out there.

Hey, I love it. For our nation. Look, if I'm committing to swinging and being a spy for our nation, I'll... We'll fuck anywhere. We're going to get at the big secrets. Yeah. The biggest secrets. The biggest blackest secrets.

In all of Paris. Thank you guys for tuning. We'll see you next time. Thank you, Joey. Have a great day. If you've made it to the end of this episode, that's because you rock with us. And for that, we rock with you. You are sophisticated.

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