Can You Don't? - Can You Don't? | Flaming Ship. Viagra. Sneeze. Truck Nuts.

Episode Date: April 9, 2025

Everyone likes to have their ear nibbled on a little bit during sexy time. It feels pretty dang nice. But what if we added a harmonica to the mix? Let's talk about that, a prankster that doesn't quite understand the limits of a prank, running against your sibling in a political race, trying to talk a stranger into letting their child tickle your feet, and more on today's episode of Can You Don't?!*** Wanna become part of The Gaggle and access all the extra content on the end of each episode PLUS tons more?! Our Patreon page is LIVE! This is the biggest way you can support the show. It would mean the world to us: http://patreon.com/canyoudontpodcast ***New Episodes every Wednesday at 12pm PSTWatch on Youtube: https://youtu.be/lzGxDTQ71dASend in segment content: [e-mail]: http://canyoudontpodcast.comMerch Inquires: [e-mail]: http://facebook.com/canyoudontpodcastIG: http://instagram.com/canyoudontpodcastYouTube Channel: https://bit.ly/3wyt5rtOfficial Website: http://canyoudontpodcast.comCustom Music Beds by Zach CohenFan Mail:Can You Don't?PO Box 1062Coeur d'Alene, ID 83816Hugs and Tugs.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Flaming ship, Viagra, sneeze, truck nuts. Welcome to episode 147. Heck yeah! Yeah, Ezra! I thought for a second he was going to screw it up. He was all pumped to do it, and I'm like, oh God, he's not going to do it. There's a couple people that called. I guess I said episode 46 last week instead of 146.

Oh. So, did that happen? I don't know. Bye, Ezzy. He left. Ezra! Hey, buddy. Any life updates?

He's just out of here? Yeah, he's leaving. Go back in there. He did his job, Ezzy. He left. Ezra. Hey, buddy. Any life updates? He's just out of here? Yeah. Go back in there. He did his job and now he's out. Kids are home. Must be spring break. They're home during a work day. We got bombarded with a whole bunch of stuff when we got here.

Sure did. He hadn't seen you guys in a while. It's been awesome. A lot of life changes. Yeah. What's going on, Ez? He's taller than you now. He's so tall.

He's got ball hair, apparently. Jesus. That's a topic for another time. He's got ball hair, apparently. Jesus. That's a topic for another time. Where's my little thing? Oh! Oh, I'm the bad guy. Oh, I peed in the luggage. How are your grades, Ezra?

Fine, I guess. It's a museum in the house right now. It is a museum of a house right now. I'm going to talk a little bit about that later. Yippee. Yippee. Just so we're clear, I didn't see his ball hair. it just said i just need to get that out of the way get that out of the way so people their minds aren't wondering you walk in and uncle brian's just like

i haven't seen you in a while you got let's see that ball here let me see your balls he didn't do that right last couple episodes it's time for you to it's time for your uh what do you call it? Physical? Turn your head and call, brother. Can you don't physical? A clinic, a business idea we should open. Yeah, like Ezra said,

episode 147. If you want to get the bonus content, you can sign up for Patreon, patreon.com slash can you don't podcast. We'll keep doing that. Also, exclusive merch, merch discounts ad free episodes early episodes and all sorts of shit that we wouldn't normally post other places goes into patreon so go check that out uh send in your content suggestions that includes petty beef or dick or confessions and we are doing a confessions episode i'm guessing maybe

maybe next week maybe the week after after. I don't know. That email address is heyguys at candydontpodcast.com. Reminder, we have that merch giveaway. Is that Kirk Hammond on guitar? It's just ripping. And by the time you hear this particular episode, the merch giveaway

might be over. I'm guessing it will be. But anyway, regardless, head over to candydontpodcast.com. We have a lot of new merch there regardless joe yeah regardless big sweaty flong yeah on the show today it's that girthy hog just a meat fucking just cranking hog oh just that that hog in the the porn like fresh after the ejaculate, just dangling there, just purple. I mean, it's alive, but is it? Like that type of look? It needs a nap.

It did its job, but now it's your job? Yeah. He hands it over to you. He's like, all right, well, you're on cleanup, right? Yeah, you're on cleanup and cuddle duty. I did my job. So doing a thick-ass one. You found something funny in the Facebook world?

Yeah I got a request You know how I'm sure you guys You know how it is I'm sure you guys have got requests for like those fake accounts Oh yeah And sometimes it's like Is it fake?

And sometimes like oh yeah it's fake Yeah Regardless I don't look at it Yeah I decided to look at this one I'm sorry if you send me friend requests I literally There are like

I don't even know but well over 10,000 so I'm sorry I just I don't go into that world It's not that we don't want to be friends with you I just don't post shit anymore So there's that okay yeah but I know what you're talking about So Zach If you want to pull this up on the screen here

This is one I got the other day You got some money on you? I got like 5 bucks What a shitty producer that would be everybody pushes five bucks he's like yeah five bucks give me a dollar i'll fucking do it you're like dude by the push this is your this is what you're doing dude yeah okay uh so i got this one mean hang speaking of sweaty flong dude 526 followers 19 likes okay so it wasn't like a personal uh page friend it was it was i i think it was a uh recommended follow from my like a public figure page yeah so this is what so i went i was like i was curious so i mean a very attractive little asian woman here okay um and then i'm guessing maybe ai yeah looks a little she looks a little too perfect even though

it's quite attractive but this wasn't the crazy thing it's crazy as i've seen thousands of these profiles with just some sexy chick on there and it it says that this personal page is a musician band. That's who it is. Yeah. So. Yeah, she's obviously, she plucks the keys or. There's something. Slap of the bass or.

I mean, with that complexion, like maybe harp. Oh, yeah. Like a harp player. Yeah, definitely a harp player. Coming out next, Mean Hang. So, and then her little intro says, hello, everyone, video creator. But that wasn't even the funny thing. Okay.

The funny thing is I started scrolling through the page to see what was going to be on the page. Yeah? What the fuck is this? So as you can see here, the first video is just an AI image of a boat crashing on shore on fire. Okay? Yeah, it's like an AI video of a flaming cargo ship. Very detailed. Hitting like a tourist beach. Yeah.

Okay. So if that wasn't enough. Oh shit. Another one below it from a different angle. People just standing in the ocean on the beach getting plowed over by a cruise ship on fire. Like they don't see it coming. Nope. Just standing there watching.

And then you scroll more. Oh, another boat on fire. Followed by another boat. Is this a threat? On fire. I don't know. What? Gosh.

This boat is spinning on a beach on fire, killing people. Over people, yeah. What? And it just goes on. Shout out to my news followers. Excited to have you on board. On board? One light.

Yeah, on board. Now here's one. The boat is to have you on board. On board. One light. Yeah, on board. Now here's one. The boat is just on the beach now. On fire. Completely engulfed in flames. It looks like it's still moving just a little bit. Yeah, it's creeping. And nobody cares.

Nope. They're just going about their business. They're just like, fuck, my margarita is going to take forever. Yeah. So it just, I mean, it just goes on And on Like this Just different boats on fire Either on the beach or just in the ocean I mean that is a friend you should have though

Like what if these are all real Yeah That'd be intense He's a band musician But look at these are all getting reactions They're all getting reactions That boat is out of the water It is flying

Look at the people It's doing a kick twist Hitting a sandbar Why would it do that It's just so funny If you're watching a video You're scrolling through and you see a fucking ship on fire You're gonna stop and check it out for a second

We've been scrolling For quite a while and it's we're i'm only at march 23rd here yeah and it's just every single thing is a ai of a boat on fire yeah and they all came out the same day crashing into a beach full of people okay so i just thought the contrast between this very attractive young asian woman the thing you get all the time you're like oh yeah on a boat and then you start scrolling just boats on fire boats on fire killing tourists she did say she's mean so yeah mean hang yeah it wouldn't be a fun hang it'd be a mean hang yeah anyway that is she

moved to new york march 8th just in case you're curious that's when all the photos started yeah that's when she's like you will not believe how crazy it is out here in new york this is every day this is an everyday occurrence her mom's writing like are you safe well yeah i'm not going on the boats i'm just getting the video of the boats i'm just i'm just here for a good time mom uh anyway so that's well good for her it goes and goes going it does yeah well i think you should accept that if you want to look at the up the facebook page it's mean like mean m-e-a-n and then one word hang h-e-n-g-h just scroll for hours watch ai flaming boats flaming boats have yourself a fucking day yeah all right let's get the show rolling yeah hey shut up start the show already.

She is attractive, though. I mean, I could see, like, if you want to watch your porn or whatever, but you could basically describe the ideal woman and then make her do things. Yeah. That's pretty cool. Yeah, the future is going to be crazy. And then maybe have her printed out into, like, a doll, and it's like, this is the perfect woman.

That process is going to take a bit. Yeah. They have them. They got some pretty good ones. They have. I know, but ones that you want, you print them. You're like, okay, put it on. And then you print a sextile out of your 3D printer, and you look at it.

It's going to be a little fucking off. Just for a bit. Yeah, a bit. They'll figure it out. It'll be close enough. We'll get the job done. You dug into the emails this week. Did I? Found. Yeah, a bit. They'll figure it out. It'll be close enough. We'll get the job done. You dug into the emails this week. Found a little

would you rather? Yeah, and Danny Bear's always got fun stuff. I was just, and Danny, don't take this the wrong way, but I was actually in the shower, and I was thinking to myself. You were thinking of yourself in the shower? Thinking to myself. God damn.

I was like, God, Joe, you are a good shower guy. God, you're a good specimen. Look at you in here. Just showering. Look at you. Wow. Just washing your armpits. God, I wish the showers made a mirror.

You do have a window in your bathroom. I do. Which I went pooping there the other day. Didn't realize I could see into the neighbor's living room from the bathroom. Yeah. So that was kind of awkward. That's what helps me poop. I know, but I was thinking, and I was like,'t heard from danny beer in a while yeah well and then

fucking the next day here he is he wrote in and everything so he's out there danny beer glad you're doing well yeah i think the last time he wrote in he was in quite the predicament about knocking up co-workers right trying to figure out what to do with all that. He seems like he's maybe back to normal now. Yeah. And for him, this is normal. Okay. All right. So he wrote in this for a Would You Rather. Okay. So I tweaked it a little bit, but I like the premise, the foundation.

Would you rather have to tickle your own feet for 20 minutes? What a waste of time. Which could be kind of fun. Yeah. But not like full on tickle. It's like a little caress feet for 20 minutes. What a waste of time. Which could be kind of fun. But not like full-on tickle. It's like a little caress. For 20 minutes? Can you even tickle your own feet? Watch a TV show and just tickle? I can't tickle myself.

Oh, well, that's the whole thing. You don't really tickle yourself where you can't stand it. It's like a good tickle. It feels good. You're just touching your feet for 20 minutes. Yeah. Okay. Got it. Or have to sneeze on three babies done there's danny yep there it is um so that i i sort of agreed with you on the tick of your own feet where it's like yeah but it's it can only go so far type of thing but it's also kind of it's just an it's an annoying thing yeah like the whole time just

what the fuck am I doing? So I tweaked it a little bit and I want to go with this way. Okay. Here's what I change it to. So would you rather have to ask a parent for their kid to tickle your feet for 20 minutes or have to sneeze on three babies? Okay. So you either go up, sneeze on three random babies, or you have to go up to a parent and be like, hi, that's, is your son good at tickling?

Because I'd like him to tickle my feet for 20 minutes I was watching your son on the monkey bars He's got a great set of fingers on him I think he'd be down to tickle my feet I've got a set of feetsies that need to be tickled That need a good tickling How would they react? Put your phone away, I already called the cops

There's nothing sexual. There's not purely just... Black magic. Tickle. It's just something I have to do. I won't ejaculate. Just give him Danny Beer's phone number. I'll give you my...

That's my playground guarantee. There will be no ejaculation. So the way this is set up, this is just a one-off. Okay? Yeah. This isn't like a once a week. Yeah. it's just would you rather just got to get through it tomorrow you got to go do this get someone

else's kid to tickle your feet in this case like being in like i mean you know not married but being in a stepfather figure i mean i'd for sure guess that's page you're taking my feet for 20 minutes yeah that's no one's going to like it. That's a little loophole-y, though. Is it, though? I think it's got to be a random person. Okay. So, no tie.

They can't be. Okay. You've never met them before. Although, it would be weird to think about going up to my sister and be like, hey, do you think your daughter, I'm not going to say her name, do you think she would want to tickle my feet for 20 minutes? That might make Christmas a little awkward. Call me crazy. I'm looking over here at your daughter here. At her birthday party?

What did I get her? These fucking piggies. These little tootsies that need a little tickling. Just 20 minutes. Oh my God. You're sitting on the floor. Your niece is tickling your toes while all of the birthday party goers sit in a semi-circle around you and you're going like what a creepy scene it's kind of like you're sitting around to play duck duck goose but it's just you two in the middle yeah i also don't feel comfortable talking about this when you like we're talking about my son's balls earlier. Yeah.

What's happening? I don't know. I said this before the show started. It's been getting a little, uh, the last couple of weeks, a little pedophile, a little petty.

It's pedophily. And then I didn't even, I completely forgot. This was the, the would you rather. So this is just making it worse. Oh, last week we were at a kid's hospital jerking off.

Yeah, man. I feel like I'd like to forget these couple of weeks. Like I said earlier, no one worry about it. I've already called the cops. Yeah. They're on their way.

They're on their way. They'll be here. I only need 20 minutes. Yeah. I actually warned the scat cast audience. I didn't tell him what was coming. It wasn't about the, the pedo stuff,

but it was about the, uh, the dog and the airport. Oh yeah. I just warned him like, wait audience. I didn't tell them what was coming. It wasn't about the pedo stuff, but it was about the dog in the airport. Oh, yeah. I just warned them, like, wait for a curveball. Oh, I know. That's happening today. Yeah. Dog, the time we record that. Yeah.

I can't wait to ruin everyone's day. That should be the little tagline. Can you don't? We'll ruin your day. Maybe today's episode should have, or last week's episode should have had a disclaimer. We didn't do it. You're right. We didn't do it.

Yeah. But one of these things is not like the other. I don't think we've had anything else quite like that since I've been here. But it's just so, it's so fucking. You needed to know, dude. It changed my life. And like we said on the show, you've been living your life for years. Like this story just came out, but it already happened.

And you've been doing all right. So fucking deal with it. Anyway, so you're getting your feetsies tickled or are you sneezing on some babies? How funny it would be to sneeze on a baby. Just walk up and sneeze? Yeah. Three of them. What a cute baby.

Yeah. Sorry. Do you just try and sneak it? I think it's got to you... Three of them. Yeah. What a cute baby. Yeah. Sorry. Do you just try and sneak it? I think it's got to be three different babies, too. Yeah. Yeah, it can't be just... You can't just be like,

well, three sneezes are right on the same baby. Nope. Nope. That would be fucking funny, though. You're like, you sneeze and they're like, what are you doing?

You're like, hold on, hold on. Two, that's the limit, right? No. And then one more, and you just go, I'm free, motherfucker. And then you blow your nose on their binky. Yeah. You take the little bib, like covered in baby throw up, wipe it off. You're like, that's nice milk.

And then walk away. Or maybe like the mom's shirt or something. Yeah. Like she would care. Her shirt's disgusting anyway. She has a baby. Yeah. Trying she would care. Her shirt's disgusting anyway. She has a baby. Yeah. Trying to sneak around and sneeze on three babies.

Would you deliberately do it? Or would you be like, uh, like, I don't know, sitting at a, say you're at a play and you're like, Oh,

that's a good spot. And you sit there and you tickle your nose. You just go, and you just do it. And everyone's like, and you're like, so sorry. So sorry.

And then leave and get up and then go to the next spot. Cause that's not the beginning of the day. He's got to sneeze on three leave. And get up and then go to the next spot. Because it doesn't have to be in a day. He's got to sneeze on three babies. Might as well get it out of the way, though. Just go to a daycare and just get it out of the way. Just go to a daycare, sniff some pepper. And just... Like, instead of a school shooting, it's just a school sneezing.

Well, what are you going to say to get into the daycare? Because I tried to get in there one time. Any kids in there, like, tickling feet? Yeah, I tried to get in there one time. Any kids in here like tickling feet? Yeah, I tried to get in there one time and they were like, yeah, you can't come in here. Do you have a kid here? No. Why are you here? You tell me.

I just thought it would be cool. I mean, I like babies as much as the next guy. I was bored. I was bored. Do you have a slide? Your fence is short. What do you want to do With the children here

Nothing I just want to play on the toy Dude you're lucky I didn't jump the fence It's so tiny Like I'm doing this I'm trying to be respectful And you're

You're not You're not giving me Showing me the same respect I could have jumped Your tiny fence And gone right on That fucking swing set Okay

Knocked your ass over Yeah you'd be like Hey sure you can't do that And I'm like Punch you in the face Fucking watch me i punch you in the face sneeze on three babies i gotta go home um i think just because sneezes are so violent and uncontrolled that you could probably you'd have a little more forgiveness with like you're like i'm fuck me i'm so sorry i'm a violent sneezer yeah cassie makes fun of me hates me for it some like some like my whole body is just like oh yeah like i

fucking fold in half i'm like you know and it's like it really it's like fucking the three little pigs and the wolf like trying to blow over a building uh whereas like some ladies heard like that's how my wife is if i have that then i'd probably do that it'd probably be an obvious choice but everyone's gonna know i i sneezed on that baby i know in the vicinity everyone's gonna know i know but the the whole the town's gonna talk if you're going around like how many you're gonna get you're gonna be the top of the to talk if you're going around. How many? You're going to be the top of the town, bro. Because you're going to get rejected so many times. Having a conversation about, can your kid tickle my feet?

And they're like, yeah, sure. One second, I'll be right back. And they're like, Brian, you know what Brian just asked? And then you have to, you live with that. Yeah. But sneezing on babies. I'd go to a town I don't live where they don't know me. You travel?

Yeah, I travel. Have questions out of town? Yeah. But sneezing on babies, although... I'd go to a town I don't live where they don't know me. You'd travel? Yeah, I'd travel. Have questions while traveling? Yeah. You don't think cops or the internet is going to go with you? Watch out for this guy. It's true. With a picture of you, just like, mid-conversation, trying to explain that you're a kid. Yeah, just...

Just a gross picture. With this mustache Profile picture Can you take your kid Like to Pick up my feet Just one of these From their pocket

Like there's just a A tiny picture Yeah so it's down Hey sorry I don't want to Have you seen this man Have you seen this man He asked if my kid Could tickle his feet

See I'm steering clear of that So I'm just clear of that. So I'm just going to sneeze on three babies. Yeah. Because everyone understands that when a sneeze comes out of nowhere, there's really nothing you can do about it. I think it's easier to play off sneezing on a baby than it is asking parents for their kid to tickle their feet. So.

Like one, you will be branded and put on a list most likely. The other one, they're going to, they're going to glare at you, but in the end you're helping build their immunity. True. Like it's not, you're not, I mean, if you have like the flu and then that's the day you decide to go do it. Yeah. That's going to be a problem.

COVIDs. Yeah. Just don't do that. And I think you're good. What about if you sneeze and you sneeze blood and you have AIDS? The AIDS. You give them that baby AIDS. If it goes in, I guess, an orifice.

Here's another question. If you have AIDS and you have sex with someone, do you give them HIV or do you give them AIDS? Anybody know the answer to that? I think you give them HIV first. I'm not sure. Yeah. HIV turns into AIDS. That's why I figured.

Like you don't get a fast pass? Yeah, like you don't jump the line and get right into AIDS. I don't have time for HIV. I just want to get the AIDS. Listen, you got to work your way up like the rest of us. You don't get to skip the line. Fucking who do you think you are? Okay, so Sne sneezing on babies

I'm going sneezing on babies Zach Absolutely Yeah Is this sneezing Sneezing on a baby No I'm Schmiedli Schmiedli Whippleash

And I might have brought this up On the show before But it's not very often We talk about sneezes I just want to share My favorite thing To say when someone sneezes And that's

Sneeze is Christ Okay Sneeze is Christ Like when you sneeze Or the person You're reacting to the person favorite thing to say when someone sneezes and that's sneezes christ okay sneezes christ like when you sneeze or someone else you're reacting to the person yeah they do it and you just go sneezes christ sneezes christ exactly you get it i know a guy that used to say possess you instead of bless you oh he's kind of a satanist you don't say you never know my dad was always a gesundheit guy that's annoying little too german though we have a german family okay our german shepherd was named fritz for fuck's sakes all right sneeze not babies let's move off zach hey hey what's up babe what are you thinking about uh you know nothing actually you know

what i'm thinking about a lot of shit what are you thinking about so as my beautiful and freakishly tall son alluded to at the beginning of the program program the program the program uh so we're trying to move so we've had to Get the house ready And I talked about this on the bonus stuff last week So they already knew And if you've ever done the moving thing You have to have your house show ready Where they'll call and be like

Hey, two hours from now, you Get the fuck out of here And then some people are going to walk around and judge all your shit Can you imagine if you were pooping and they walked in? Yeah, I can. But anyway, so we're getting ready. Don't show them the bathroom for a couple hours. Yeah, and it sucks. You're living in a museum.

You don't want to cook. Everything you do, you get a little text or a phone call saying, someone's coming, you leave, and then when you leave, make sure there's no signs that people have ever been here. Don't microwave leftover fish. Yeah, you can't do anything.

And it's whatever. So anyway, process is going good. But that's not the point of this story. The new house that we're looking at, we love it. And it has this, it's not waterfront, but it has water there. And it comes with a boat. You have your own water? I have.

So, listen. I'm not trying to sound bougie. I have my own private lake. Wow. No one else. It's not that. It's not like. I'm not trying to be like, this is that cool.

But it's fucking massive house. It's all marble. And there's a yacht. And it comes with a free yacht. Yay. No, but like, so this community. You ought to do better than that. Like, uh, it has its own, you know, boat, dock, marina type situation where all of the

houses also have their own dock. Do you have to share a dock with somebody? No. That's the opposite of bougie. Gosh dang, man. So anyway, this particular situation. How poor are you? The way that, uh, cause we were at, because that's a big part of it, right?

Like we're lake people. We love being out there. We love the water. Like summer in this part of the country, and I know you have talked about this, and I've been to a lot of places, but summer in the Northwest is really fucking hard to beat. It's really short. So you got to. You have four months

of fucking tits-out weather. It's just... And it's so fun. Everyone is so pumped because that's what you get, and then after that, it's back to sadness. Yeah. Well, now with the fires, we get like a month and a half of good

laces. Well, this house comes with its own fire department. Oh. yeah we wouldn't be they live on the yacht until there's a fire and they'll make sure and it comes with uh the fire department has a big fan and they blow all the smoke away i'm not trying to you know it's not bougie or anything it's just come to the house um so we had some questions about it because this was important. And up to this point, we haven't been able to get down to this private area because as you go through talks, they're not just like letting anybody down there. That's bullshit. How do I know if I want to buy this place? There you go.

Because they have pictures. And we're like, come on. So we reached out. We talked. I've seen pictures of vaginas. They want to experience it i hear you so we talked to the hoa you know i mean president and he agreed to meet up with us and answer some questions and let us down there and uh like this it was a rainy day and then right when we got down

there like we walked across this little bridge to get over to the dock area what i was just i was thinking this side note of talking to the HOA guy about it. He's like, we can't just let... We have pictures. He's like, yeah, but I've seen pictures of vaginas. Like you're using that as your thing? And he's like...

He's about to put the key in the lock and you're like, listen. I mean, yeah, you hear me. I've seen pictures of vaginas and buttholes, but I want to stick my dick in them. And he just pulls the key back out. And he goes, maybe this isn't going to work out. He looks at you and he goes, which house was it?

I have another one down there. And he's like, I don't think that one's available. He goes, that's funny. It just went off the market. I just bought it. Vaginas and butts, huh? That's not going to off the market. I just bought it. Yeah, yeah. Huh. Vaginas and butts, huh? That's not going to work down here. That was the line.

Yeah. Anyway. Anyway, so let us in. And right when we were crossing the bridge, like the clouds parted and the sun was like, fuck yeah. It was like, check it out. So we popped down there and it's Cassie and I, our realtor, HOA president, his wife, and they're really nice

and we're talking we're all laughing and making jokes and it looks like it looks gorgeous like happy like the dock is well maintained we're not getting some rotten fucking piece of shit that we're gonna have to replace and just like it's one of those settings where they're there they're friendly the sun is hitting us like everyone's like and happy they're, ha, and happy. They're like, come on over here. And they walk us over to the other side of the dock to take a look at some other things. And as this is happening, I just have this moment. I'm like, this is it. I was like, this is the vibe.

This is where I can see all of our kids loving it. And it's a hard fact to accept as a parent. And I remember doing this when I was a kid. When you hit those teenage years, it's not about like you don't love your parents. Like my parents are divorced. It's not like I didn't love my mom. My dad's house was just like way more fun to be at. And it fucking broke my mom's heart.

Right? Yeah. She should have worked harder. Yeah. It's like this fucking place sucks. But like it wasn't like I didn't love you. It was just like over here, I had a half pipe and a fucking basketball hoop, all my music equipment.

Your dad understood the assignment. Yeah. My own fucking room. Right. And my mom, it's like at my mom's house, me and my brother in high school had bunk beds. Like metal army bunk beds where I'd be trying to fall asleep listen to my brother jerk off the whole the whole just like your mom didn't want to let you guys go yeah and you know we had some fun there backyard whatever you know we'd make we'd make do yeah but had nothing to

do with our mom which is because the it just was a better space to be in. So we know that, now with teenage girls, that you need to have a place they want to be at. And it's not because they don't love you. It's just because there's nothing to fucking do at your house. Different interests. So anyway, we're trying to ramp it up and pump it up and be a spot that our kids' friends will want to come over, opposed to our kids just want to get the fuck out and go somewhere else. Right.

So that's the whole game plan. So I'm down there and I'm picturing our kids and I was like, it's fucking it. Just vibing. And Cassie and I are smiling and laughing. This is fucking awesome. And as I'm saying this, this huge, I don't know what, flock of ducks

are coming through the stream. And I'm just looking, the light's bouncing off them just right. They're coming through the water or flying? Through the water. Okay. And there's so many of them. Like 100, 200 of them. They're just like, like every now and again, one's like.

And they're just slowly going through the little waves, you know, little ripples and the light's flashing off them because it's kind of towards dusk and i was like this is so beautiful and then as this is all happening the hoa president's like he's like oh he goes there they are like talking about the ducks goes yeah you phone danny all the time and i'm like fuck yeah man i kiss him i don't but you fingered him yeah and as they're all going through for some reason a duck in the back was like Dude, this is boring. I'm flying and he took off. I have wings. What are we doing? Wings in our fucking god damn it. So he doing this so he takes off in the back And then all the rest of them were like fuck

So as they flew over each other they all took off and it's the rest of them were like, fuck, good idea. What did we think of this too? So as they flew over each other, they all took off. And it's a lot of ducks. It's a whole flock. And I'm watching them. You hear all the ducks flapping. It's that noise. I think every human's familiar with that.

And they're just taking off and watching them. Beautiful setting. Majestic. And then as they keep flying, they all start slamming into the bridge. Oh. We just walked over. Knocking themselves out.

Because one takes the lead and they all follow. They all flew. And you know, it's like you're in a pack of people walking and you're the third one. And like a picture and then all of a sudden the two in front of you peel off of a post but you're just in go mode and they're like that and they and they're like oh that bridge and they fly over it but you're blinded and these ducks just just going just slamming into this bridge and all of us are just like oh oh oh yeah like i'm not kidding 15 20 ducks just just and i'm like this beautiful scenery and i was like i can see my this is it man i can see my life down here just like giving cassie one of these little guys like can you believe we're

about to do this like if this works out hey we've made it. And then the ducks and fuck. And they just started slamming. I'm like, please, none of you break your fucking dumb duck necks. Because I don't want to go over there and deal with it. Yeah, they're just all flipping upside down. You got to kill them. Like, you don't want them to suffer. Thankfully, all the ones that slammed in, it was quack, quack, quack.

And then they just, like, swam under the bridge. And then they took off and caught up with their friends but it is funny just this beautiful thing and then just watching ducks slam into a bridge and you're like oh it just took the whole vibe out i i'm trying to picture like the hoa guy or if they're trying to say they're trying to sell you the house now that happens yeah oh then sometimes that happens you know free a free dinner see like that's a joke that i he's like he's like we come down here every night and these dumb ducks are dead and he's like what the fuck we don't have to run to the supermarket anymore right on and we're like yeah you just come grab him out of the water and just give their neck a

little twist finish them off throw them right in the pan I know good god dude but it was just a really funny moment just that surreal there's nothing better

than taking it all in than just serene versus and then wildlife just took it away yeah and then we just

watched that happen and everyone just went to the other side we're like okay we're not doing this anymore I love it I know it. I know.

It's like, it reminds me of like, what, like you're on a safari and everything's going great and like the kids are laughing and then all of a sudden a giraffe smashes his head

through the windshield and it's like, or just rips all your food out of your hand. The kids are screaming. Or like that video we watched one time back in the day,

like everything's going great and then a monkey jumps on the windshield and he starts jerking off in front of the family, and then comes all over, and then eats his own cum, and then runs away. I've seen that video. Yeah. Fucking unreal. His weird fucking mushroom dick.

And the kids are like, oh my god! I think there's a mom or a dad just laughing And he's just like yeah Jerking off right in front of the family And then comes in his hand and eats it And then runs away It's like this beautiful thing You've been working extra shifts To afford this safari trip

And this monkey's like fuck your safari I'm gonna eat my cum Easy come easy go Anyway see ya Safari trip and this monkey's like fuck your Safari. I'm gonna eat my cum Easy come easy go anyway, see ya boing boing. Oh animals are great. I know so it's just like reminded me of that This is it, baby. And then just Slam it into a little bridge. That's fun. So you're gonna have an OH an HOA huh? Yeah. That'll be fun. But it's not bad. Not bad. Not bad.

You have to take turns ringing duck necks? Yeah, I think once a month. If it's a Tuesday. Every other Tuesday. Hon, it's our day. I think the whole city of Liberty Lake is an HOA. Really? We're on the...

This house, which is nice, is on the county side. So we don't have to do with Liberty Lake laws. Nice. We're in the county. We're free! We're on the... This house, which is nice, is on the county side. So we don't have to do with Liberty Lake laws. Nice. We're in the county. We're free! We're free out here! So I'm allowed to drive my 10-year-old car to your neighborhood without getting a weird bus? You sure are.

Funny thing about Liberty Lake is... Why are you not dragging a bumper? Well... Everyone just... Yeah, everyone just drives golf carts everywhere. Which I didn't know, But they have golf cart bridges everywhere In Liberty Lake You guys gonna get a golf cart?

How can you not? If I collect enough ducks and trade them in Sell your car and just buy a golf cart That'd probably work out great For bringing the kids to school and stuff Alright kids get in we have a 4 hour trip To Coeur d'Alene. We had...

Dad, I'm cold. Put the fucking plastic thing in the front of me. Yeah, yeah. Yep. Zip. I'm doing my best. Do you remember how fun summer was? I had friends that I grew up on a lot of time On the golf course Like the

The club golf course And all my friends Had golf carts And they all had like Sound systems in there So we'd go out Late at night Down the golf course

Just beastie boys And stuff Ripping through Eating pizza It's a fun time I know So trying to give Trying to give the kids

That fun Just Silly Safe Lifestyle I think that's great Yeah We decided It's a fun time. I know. So trying to give the kids that fun, just silly, safe lifestyle. I think that's great. Yeah. We decided, we did the trampoline. We're doing like getting all this stuff so all the neighborhood kids will come to our house for the same reason. Because our kids like being at home, but we know it's going to change at some point.

So we're trying to be in a spot that people want to go. Like, come on, let's just go to your house. And then they're fine. You need a pool, bro. Ah, well. Pool is the win. The lake works. The lake for you, but for Brian.

We're right across the street from a public pool, which all the kids go to. I'm not a big public pool guy. It's kind of gross, but it is right across the street, so. Yeah. Fair enough. All right. We can make do with that. So anyway, if everything we

gotta wrap up recording today because i gotta get out of my fucking museum house for another another showing but it's looking good it's looking good as of right now so we'll uh we'll see might be moving the studio here in the speed count what's that need a house no you can have you can buy this one yeah i could oh my god thinking about moving your fucking house, dude. Yeah, all that crazy shit. All the chickens. Oh, my goodness.

I'd help you. Well, I wouldn't ask you because then we wouldn't be friends anymore after we moved all that shit. Everything has to be heavy, doesn't it? It seems like there's some heavy stuff in that house. This house is made of pure oak furniture. How many fucking aquariums are there? Like seven or nine. What things are possessed and what's not? Should I touch this?

It's like 50-50. He's like, possessed, possessed, possessed. Oh yeah, grab that one. Oh wait, no possessed shit, sorry. You pick it up and you're like... It's a quick wash your hands. Oh shit, I gave you the possessed wash. You're like,

fuck! It's just a blood. You have AIDS and, uh, something. Mm-hmm. Whatever, which things you can get.

Nice. Which one is that? Get it? I got it. All right. All right. Well, there you go.

Shared that story. Well, I want to get that flong. Sure. All right. Let's fucking get a grip on this fucking flong is it interesting is it cool it is key i remember when i came up for that jingle i was in my dad's house in the shower again thinking about danny beer i was thinking about myself first and then danny beer and then that jiggle but i remember i was like washing my hair and

i was like like just a fucking idiot but it works it's catchy using like old man shampoo like the time that it makes you tingle weird oh yeah like selsun blue whatever the fuck that is yeah grow up dad or you're not fully clean that's your zest fully clean just old stuff that made your head tingled uncomfortably they still sell per plus probably remember that shit just wash and go i used to to think they meant just put it in your hair and then it would just... And then get out of the shower? Yeah, I was pretty dumb. Still am. Alright, let's do some dick stuff. What do you got for us?

Quiet! I got a pretty crazy story. I'm ready to hear it. This is fucking wacky, dude. Fuck yeah, dude. Imagine if this guy was your boss. Okay. At anywhere... Anywhere else, imagine if this guy was your boss Okay At anywhere else Imagine if this guy was your boss

But now this guy is your boss As a police chief Oh okay So this guy is like he's the head of The people that are supposed to be protecting you And like that you're supposed to Lean on if you need help The way you're setting this up

It just seems like it's not a story that's like, cops are going to be great people. Okay. If I'm wrong, then I'm wrong. But I don't think I'm going to be wrong. What do we got here? Don't think you're far off. Alright. Police chief defecated in office.

Put Viagra in office coffee. New Jersey cops claim. That's just part of it. Several police officers filed tort claims. What the fuck is a tort claim? It's a legal thing. Like torture? Tort laws.

Yep. Saying he defecated on the office floor according to legal paperwork. A group of officers made claims against police officers in North Bergen, New Jersey for allegedly def defecating department offices, putting Viagra in the office, and other harassment. Yes? I'm so excited to hear more. Right now, all I know is that a police officer pooped on the floor. Yeah, they've pretty much repeated themselves six times already. Stuck hypodermic needle into an officer's penis.

What? And spiked coffee with Viagra, according to legal paperwork obtained by Patch. He's just a menace. I would have led with that in the headline. Yeah. It's like a guy pooped on the floor and put pills in the coffee. It's like, what about the fucking hypodermic needle he stuck in someone's dick?

And it doesn't say, it says later on that he made him bleed which obviously by sticking a hyper so toscano sent various notices of tort claims in january and march to the town of north burgeon on behalf of lieutenant alex guman, Officer Mike... Yeah? Are you having a hard time today? No, it's just... That's not even a sentence. It's just a bunch of names in... Like, telling who did what. Okay.

Our clients now generally fear for their on-job safety. This is Connor wrote in the letter. So request is herein to make the news... Hang on. This isn't the article that I wanted. All right. Accusations in the claims filed on behalf of the various officers range on the job harassment to pranks, including Chief Robert Farley defecating in department offices on the bathroom floor,

leaving it there, chasing in one officer around a room, stabbing his penis with a needle, drawing blood. Funny prank. funny prank what would the fish do in the coffee maker still got it the claims also accused farley of placing dangerously hot peppers in officers food and heating them up in the office microwave which drew first responders to help one sick officer this guy's a real kick in the dick this guy really doesn't understand pranks no these aren't pranks

this is like this is just yeah this is a problem in battery he's like this i know but you know this type of dude they're interviewing him and they're like okay like here i have some flipping through like okay and uh another report here says that you were chasing an officer around and stuck a needle in his dick and he's like yeah yeah it's so funny he hated needles and i'm terrified of needles he's terrified of needles and and he always said how bad he would hate it if i put it in his dick that'd be the worst thing i could do he's like the interviewer's like, okay. Okay, yeah, but this report here says that you shit on everyone's floor and never clean it up. Yeah.

Oh, that's right. I forgot about that one. I forgot about that. Yeah. Was that before or after I almost killed everybody with hot peppers? That was a crazy day. He's like, no, no, you're right. It was before that, but it was after you put Adderall and Viagra in the coffee machine. He's like.

That's right. That's why I was trying to poke his dick with that needle because it was hard for hours. So I was trying to deflate it because his dick was really hard. I thought it was Adderall that day. Turns out it was Viagra. So I was trying to deflate his dick. Turns out I ate. I had two pills.

I didn't know which ones. It turns out I ate the Adderall. He ate the Viagra. He ate the Viagra. And then I stabbed his dick with a needle. I don't know which ones. It turns out I ate the Adderall. He ate the Viagra. He ate the Viagra and then I stabbed his dick with a needle. I don't see what the big whoop. What's the big whoop? We used to do this back in the old days all the time. What's happened to this place? This place used to be fun.

And then you got HR involved. Got HR involved. Now I'm sitting here and apparently nothing's funny. Just doesn't get it. Doesn't get it what what an idiot and this isn't just this is a this is a police chief yeah this isn't like chive chive duck or chive on.com or whatever it's a fucking police office this isn't this isn't like an some tech startup and like it yeah and like an 80s tech startup where there was just kind of like anything goes just

figuring it out doing whatever cops do kind of have a pretty dark sense of humor more so than even us for sure oh yeah knowing the cops that i know they yeah yeah i agree i think i know a guy that may have done a couple pranks like that in his place too i think you know him too joe i think i think i do yeah you do um and the funny thing is, is a lot of times that you get that personality too, just that over the top alpha male and just like, and it's like, you can't, you don't know what to do because it's like, it's a person of power. They're strong and they're just doing whatever they want. Right.

And you're, they like, you're on the law side. Trying to think. It's whatever they want. Right. And you're, they, like, you're on the law side. Trying to think. It's still not okay. Okay. So here, here, here's what the, how I'm drawing this conclusion. Let's say Can You Don't had an office. Okay. And reports came out that we were shitting on the floor, to be funny.

And we were, like, whipping our dicks our dicks out at unknown times. You know that you've listened to the show, you're like, that makes sense. It hasn't happened, but it would make sense. It makes sense. The part that doesn't would be me putting drugs in your coffee. That's not funny in any environment. Or sticking a needle in your penis but all of those somewhat make sense in the candy don't office like you'd like what you'd like okay i can only

imagine what goes on at your guys's place i mean the shit we talk about okay it just none of that makes sense in a place where you're of authority and power and are taking care of the rest of us. Huh. It just doesn't work. Like, shitting on the, whipping your dick out in any office, 100% can see that. Because why not? It's a dick. It's shock comedy.

I totally get it. Dudes are dumb. And they do dumb stuff. stuff like no matter what work I guarantee you Jeff Bezos has seen an employee's penis he's probably showed an employee his penis at some point just whipping a dick out for someone to be like god damn it Johnson

and you're like and then you just go back to your desk to deliver a thing and he grabs the tablet off your lap and he dongs out. Oh, you got me. God. The old like nutsack above the belt buckle. Yeah, classic.

Like, hey, check out my belt buckle. And you pull it up and it's just your dick over the top of your pants. Yeah, it's a classic. And I can see that happening everywhere. Sticking a needle in someone's dick after you chase them around or making them take take viagra or adderall like for someone who shouldn't be taking that right blood pressure issues that scares me kill them yeah that scares me for like yeah not not even just like you're you're giving somebody something but it's like you don't know how someone's body is going to react to a drug right and i like i even worry about trying to scare someone coming

around a corner because like what if they have a heart attack or like i've had this fear like you see pranksters jump out on the sidewalk and in my head i'm thinking i would never do that because my brain goes here you don't want to kill in that they like oh and they dart out into the road and get hit by a car and die it It's like, I already think about that kind of shit, and I'm like, there's no way I would do that. Just because it's probably not going to happen, but it could. Or getting punched in the face immediately. It's quite a flight, man.

Like, I'm not a big scare person, but funny you brought that up, then we're going to move on here. But on the last trip that we took to Hawaii, for whatever reason, it just worked out and it crossed my mind and cassie was back in the laundry room and i was in the kitchen and i heard her back there and for some reason i was like ah i'm gonna scare her for like for no reason and i sat there

like a fucking idiot like it felt like 20 minutes it felt like 20 minutes but it was a couple minutes and the whole time i'm sitting there because I didn't get to immediately go into like the scare fun prank. I'm sitting there. I'm like, what are you doing? Like, I'm just a grown ass man. Yeah. And I'm having all these thoughts.

And I'm like, I was like, fuck. I was like, what if you like, she could get mad. Yeah. Right. God damn it. And then you just like ruin the vibe of the day. Yeah. And I'm sitting there having all these thoughts, listening.

And I was like, I was like, or if she's holding something and then like she drops it or blah blah and then she starts and i'm like oh my god fuck and she gets closer and right around the corner i pop out i go hey and she just goes hey so you dialed it back because you don't overdo it but i mean still given the circumstances i thought even just like like a hey yeah yeah yeah would just be enough like god what are you doing yeah like a tiny thing and i just went and she goes hey i was like just psyched myself out fucking went way back and i just stood there i think i was like i think i was naked so i'm standing naked in the hallway as a grown-ass man waiting to scare somebody and then basically chickened out just hanging dong and around the corner. And then no one cared. And then I was like, fucking waste of time.

What if somebody else would have came around? Like you didn't know that was the house. I knew. Anyway. Alright, let's move on to the next one. Okay. You'll be surprised that we are going to be talking about boobs and nut sacks. Weird. Crazy. Have you heard of Can You Know Podcast? Where we prick each other with

fucking dick needles? And for this story, we're going back to beautiful Idaho. God. Well, I'm on board with some of this. Idaho governor signs bill criminalizing public breast exposure and truck nuts. Dude, the truck nuts thing. It's tough to explain to your kids. It is pretty fucking stupid.

Like, I get it. If you put them under, you're trying to get a reaction. I don't know who, who's doing it. I don't, I'm not friends with them. I feel like I have a pretty good gauge on that. If I'm at a party that i can whittle it down to the possibility that that guy is a chance he has a some nut sacks hanging off the back of his truck and we're not going to get along so i get it but i'm on board it just feels like

you shouldn't have to have a bill saying no truck nuts. I think it's equal opportunity here is what this is all about. Okay, tell me more. Well, I thought you were doing it. Oh. No, I will. I thought you had it all planned out here. No.

Idaho Governor Brad Little, his truck nuts are too small. Signed a law bill criminalizing public exposure of breasts. That's a whole other topic. Just let the fucking titties out. And I understand there's going to be a... Free the nipples! There's going to be

a learning curve. But this particular one is targeting... You'll see. So, House Bill 270 updates Idaho's indecent exposure law, which already bans

public exposure of genitals to include female breasts, male breasts altered to look like female breasts, artificial breasts, and toys or products that resemble genitals. There it is. Okay. Breastfeeding is exempt. Glad we know that.

Yes. I'm sure that it's not going to be a gray area. Honestly, in Idaho, I'm not surprised that that's not part of it. I was going to say that too. And the reason why they're doing this is I'm guessing, I don't know, somebody like trans, transitioning trans, and then they had their shirt off and their tits out and they're like, they're kind of picking and choosing if they want to be a male or female. I think the whole titty coverup thing is a fucking joke.

Like I get it. We have sexualized breasts so much, but I don't know if anything is going to change if tits are out, right? If you're already going to be a type of dude, that's going to be jerking off and creeping on people with titties covered, you're still going to be the creep jerking off and following people when titties are out. Like, just because tits are out, like at a grocery store, doesn't automatically

make me be like, yeah. Doesn't make me do that. Just in your head. You wait until you get home. No, I still wouldn't. Have you been to porn sites? Fair enough. They're a little bit better than fucking titties shopping for milk. There's still something about real life titties.

Is there? Yeah. Because you go to a magazine, you go to a website. But you're going to take that experience back home and jerk off to it? No, no, no. I'm not saying that I would. That's what I'm saying. But I'm saying, like, if you gave me the opportunity, I'll look at anything naked once.

You know? That's what daddy's story says. That's right. But you give me, it's like, okay, I could go to this website and look at titties from being on camera, or I could go to a grocery store and not see as good titties, but they're real life and they're right in front of me. I'm probably choosing those titties. Yeah. And maybe you go to the grocery store a little more often.

I would love the grocery store. And what I'm saying is. Still shopping. Is that there's going to be like a curve, right? How many years do you think before it kind of levels out where titties go free and then everyone returns back to normal? I feel like we tried to do that. What?

But we just can't get there. Did I miss? I know. No, the whole free the nipple movement. And I feel like we tried to do that. What? But we just can't get there. Did I miss? I know. No, the whole free the nipple movement, and I feel like we're trying. I don't think anybody's trying. Idaho's not trying. No, Idaho's going backwards. I think every

state doesn't know what to do about fucking titties. I just don't get it. I think there's just a couple, I'm going to go five years. Five years of titties being out all over the place before you don't fucking care anymore. I don't think it's like you're not going to like you still like them. I want to be attracted to them.

You will be. Think about titties now. Even they're in a blanket or a shirt. Like whatever's going on with those titties. That's what makes them great though. Is it? If they were out all the time, you wouldn't be like, oh, I wish I could see those titties. So if you saw a nice pair of titties

and they were out and about and they were free i would still love it yes i'm saying if you're if you're going out and everyone's topless because you're not sucking on the titties after a while though it'd probably be like it's just just another pair of titties yeah like working at a strip club like i don't care anymore yeah sitting down and having a serious h HR conversation with a stripper. Yeah. Right when she gets off stage, we're like, listen, Rainbow. She's still sweaty.

Glitter stuck on her. On camera, we see you. Looks like you took a couple extra dollars off that stage. Just fucking covered in glitter tits. Couple ones stuck to her shoulder. She's peeling them off. She goes, no, I didn't. Come here. And she's sitting right next to you, like, over your shoulder. The tits are couple ones stuck to her shoulder she's peeling them off she goes no i didn't come here and she's sitting right next to you like over your shoulder the tits are in your face

but you're being professional about it yeah as you can see you're like that's not gonna work when you push push your giant tit off your shoulder rainbow that's not gonna work i've seen i've seen it all you need to be more like destiny it's something about uh i mean i don't i really don't get so like you see how many times have you seen a law where it's like it's some dude making the law where that guy loves tits just as much as the next guy he pretends that he doesn't because of who he's he's trying to get elected or whatever but he's so he's trying to keep titties from everybody else but he would love to see him but he knows he's got to get elected or whatever. So he's trying to keep titties from everybody else. But he would love to see them.

But he knows he's got to get the votes from the really religious people or whatever it is. And then they always, how am I supposed to explain to my kid about a pair of tits? Oh, you mean the things that they were sucking on for the first two years of their life? The thing that kept them alive? Yeah, those things that you were scared everybody to see. Yeah. So, and then. Those things.

And then there's also the other side as being a tit owner, a proud tit owner. You've got a couple of nice titties on you. Like there's also that part where you don't, you don't want that attention. Right? So I feel like if we ever do just go tits out how do we like i think everybody's gotta just go tits out because you can't tell you can't make someone have their tits out i'm saying this is worse than keeping them having making them keep them in i know i hear it's optional it's shirt no shoes no shirt no cum no no shoes no shoot no shoes no shirt my cum no problem brother no shoes no shirt my cum no

problem and another shirt was born i it really comes down to just whatever you want to do if you want to have your tits out have them out you want to cover them up cover them because you shouldn't make some old old prude lady have her tits. You can't make someone have their tits out I know but I'm just saying for the if you were gonna do this Yes, cuz like they don't they don't want the attention either So then it's like then they see a girl with their tits out then they're getting attention and they're good She's got her tits out It's out then you're walking around You're what with your partner your wife some t are out, and you look at them because fuck yeah, tits.

My wife would be like, she knows I like to see a good naked butt. She doesn't care. Yeah. No touchy. Yeah. There's a whole difference between you acting and going and touching the tits versus you just going nice pair of tits i'm i'm just as open as saying like i my wife was watching a tv show the other day and there was an actor on there and i was like god damn if i was in a dude's i'd watch the show just for him and she giggled and but we're open

about that stuff so i can be like i'd be like i'd nudge her check those tits out and she'd be like wow sick tits sick tits brian you just got to be more relaxed about stuff you know and then then we can then the tits will start to come out as soon as everyone relaxes the tits will start making their way i knew there was a master plan yeah like listen everyone just calm down and we all get to see some more tits yeah if everybody it's like the kid it's the it's the don the, don't push the red button. What do you want to do? You want to push the red button? So don't, tits are bad. So you can't show your tits. Just say tits are fine. It's literally about truck nuts, which I can get behind. I think what it really is is about trans. And a couple of trans people who have their shirts off

and the state was like, I will not allow this. I think that's probably what this bill is about. Having not gone in depth, my guess is that it's an attempt to hold back trans. That would be my guess. It's presented as a...

I guess love also attaching on truck nuts. Yeah, that's funny. It is very funny. Well, because they're probably like, well, there's no way this is going to pass. We've got to do the truck nuts too. I'll toss in the truck nuts and we'll get this back. We'll get these titties the fuck out of here. You give me the titties out of here, I'll toss in the truck nuts too yeah i'll toss in the truck nuts and we'll get this back we'll get these titties the fuck out of here you give me the titties out of here i'll toss in the truck nuts you gotta give me something i'd love to see a workaround and they do truck titties instead right i think that's a

great idea i should well right on the front right i have no toys or anything it's not a toy it's a fucking workman that resembles genitals oh genitals. Oh. Are titties genitals? They shouldn't be, generally. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah, a titty shouldn't be a genital. Genitals should be a thing that, shouldn't it? Like a dick and a vag.

It is that, yes. Okay. All right. Well, good job, Idaho. Looking forward to not seeing fucking weird truck nuts. Whoever the fuck's doing that have to come to washington for the freedom to have truck nuts all right you want to read the next one when is since when is yeah that's what's kind of funny you toss in truck nuts and then i'll

give you tranny tits yeah everyone's like always like oh i want to leave washington move to idaho because there's more freedom over there now the idahoans are going to move over here so they give their truck nuts truck nuts on and see some titties. I'm moving to Washington. For truck nuts and weed. God damn, it's so funny. Living on a border state where you have a red and a blue is hilarious. It is. Which one should we do here?

Let's try to... What do we got time for? Zigzagging? How about we do the sibling politics one? Okay. Because that's funny. Okay. Fuck yeah, go for it.

All right. Florida Senate race. Randolph Bracey slams sister for running against him in Orange County. That is so funny. I think when you were describing the story. Okay, here's a quick brief. Okay. When you were describing the story, okay, I'll just, here's a quick brief. LaVon Bracey Davis has announced she will run for Senate seat vacated after the passing of Senator Geraldine Thompson last month. This means Bracey Davis will face off against her brother, former state Senator Randolph Bracey III, for the seat.

Bracey previously held the seat, but he lost it to Thompson in 2023 primary. There will be a special election to replace Thompson in the near future, although Governor Ron DeSantis has yet to announce an official state. Okay. I will not waver. I will not retreat. I will continue to fight. Bracey Davis announced her run for the Senate seat last week, promising not to let down the voters and citizens of the district Thompson represented. Thompson's daughter, Elizabeth Thompson Grace, delivered the family endorsement. Oh, she had to choose a side.

I don't know if you have any other details, but basically the story is that it's two, a brother and a sister running for the same seat. Yeah, and Bracey Davis, the sister, said, I love my brother and I wish him well. And then the brother said, this is a sad day for the Bracey Davis, the sister, said, I love my brother and I wish him well. And then the brother said, this is a sad day for the Bracey Dave. So he's not pumped about this. No. Okay. Only one day after Thompson's death on February 13th, Bracey posted on social media to announce his intention to seek election for the seat.

The answer is yes. I will be seeking election for the seat the answer is yes i will be seeking election for district 15 bracy then released a statement following his sister's announcement and said this is a sad day for the bracy name my sister choosing to run against me dishonors our father's legacy in every way possible does it though just thinking about like on a death. And their dad is like, just promise me one thing. You won't go against your brother. You're going to do your womanly duties. Just promise you guys both won't run against each other for the District 15 seat.

We promise. God damn it. It's all he wanted he's like sorry all right i will i will not disparage our father who believed in this family but debating my sister uh by this by debating my sister in any format so i just picture this fight, it starts somewhat professional, right? Like they have a debate and they're talking about like politics and like things that matter to the citizens in Florida, right? And he's like, yeah, well, at least I didn't wipe boogers under the table. Just bring it up. Weird kid shit. Yeah, well, at least I didn't get caught by mom masturbating in the bathroom for the fifth time that day.

You say you don't want to disgrace our father Well you disgraced our father by blah blah blah When you snuck out When you snuck out and got Jimmy pregnant And the audience is just like What? All these old childhood She missed Carrie

Like they're just fucking Screaming sibling shit at each other god no wonder mom hates you hates me having a sister like growing up it was just the two of us this is hilarious to me because there were so many times when we'd fight over the tv or what we were watching and i remember this one time my sister grabbing the remote and throwing it at me and me ducking and putting a hole in the wall. And then we actually came together to figure out a solution. And we got like toilet paper, got it wet and shoved it in the hole and then covered, like put a lamp in front of it and everything. And then your mom goes home and she's like, she walks out like, let me guys give you a kiss and looks over and like the lamp is on the floor.

Wait a second yeah like there's a perfectly fine table next to it and there's just a fucking lamp not on it that's been there for 20 something years this is weird yeah it does the circle and you guys are both like i don't know just like sitting together all kind she looks at you guys looks at the lamp on the floor. And then just goes over and moves it. There's wet toilet paper in the wall. She's like, fuck me. It's funny how the siblings though, you know, you'll fight like you want to murder each other. And then like we came together to fix that problem. But then another problem arose.

But it's just that whole thing, like fighting over the spot at the dinner table, all these little petty things. And what's fun, like what you said, like all that stuff coming up, like boiling to the top during a, a debate for like a, an actual political office where people are voting you in and your decisions

affect those people directly. You're just sitting there like just wishing his property tax would go down. Yeah. And you're down yeah you're like your is your fucking idea to put wet toilet paper in the wall it was your idea wouldn't work you'd see right through it yo she wouldn't notice the lamp was off the coffee table you fucking idiot that's just like your spending bill and the guy yeah right the guy's sitting there with like a like a like more education sign, he just like tucks it away. He's like, nothing's happening here. But it's funny you brought that up about sibling fights. I remember in particular one time with my brother.

And I was the annoying little brother that thought my older brother was so cool. And his friends were cool. Everybody was cooler in his life than me. So sometimes we're like, yeah, we ride bikes. And I'm like, can I come? You're like, yeah. Yeah, he's like, no. And then mom's like, take your brother.

And he's like. Yeah. Like, I don't know what they're probably actually doing, but once little brother's there, he fucking ruins everything. Oh, yeah. But we were at this rope swing in the woods. Because that's what you do in small town shit. Fucking swing rope and drive tractor brother and uh i remember him being like god joe just get the fuck out of here

i was like no and then his friend was like come on get the fuck out of here my brother was like you don't fucking talk only i can talk to him and then like even all of that like i was like in that moment i was like yeah yeah even though he literally just told me to get the fuck out of here he stood up for you he's like just go home and his friends like yeah go home he's like you don't fucking tell my brother to go home that's funny that's awesome and then he's like come on he's like yeah come on and then all of a sudden it's switched oh yeah you can be the asshole to him tells his friend to go home yeah his friend and he's like fuck you can't fucking talk he's like sorry dude just like from that other friend perspective where someone's like yeah he's like yeah like

supporting you then all of a sudden he's like you fucking jesus whoa whoa only i get to disrespect my family's name oh man but yeah so this is uh good luck in this senate race or whatever this district 15 chair you guys are screwed i will not troll or whatever i will not be following it but i hope you guys uh all do well maybe we'll get an update maybe somebody else out there can follow it and give us an update oh all right well let's take a look at some good news okay so you're telling me there's a chance hooray we aren't doomed. Yeah! Man, I've thought about that. I've done a one-off in this same realm, but nothing like these ladies have done. So these women have been exchanging the same birthday card for 81 years.

Oh, my God. Okay. A Kentucky woman received mail from her lifelong friend on her birthday and opened it to find a familiar card. The same birthday card the women have been sending to one another for 81 years. Pat DeRemer, who turned 95 on Tuesday, said the tradition began on her 14th birthday in Indianapolis when her friend, Mary Wheaton, gave her a birthday card. DeRemer added her own signature to the card and returned it to wheaton for her birthday in may

i know but it's just like it's so i wish it was like i always find it funny you but you know just being the fucking weirdo i am like you buy a card that doesn't make sense for people like that's my sense of humor yep like happy 90th but it's like your fucking 40th birthday. Get well soon. Get well soon. It's your anniversary. Right. Sorry. I hope things turn around for you and just give it to them on their anniversary.

Yeah. So the exchange began a tradition and now it's in its 81st year. We never said we're going to do this. At least I don't remember ever saying that. It just happened. Doreen were told WLKY TV. remember ever saying that it just happened dreamer told wlky tv the women earned a guinness world record on the 60th year of their tradition for the longest greeting card exchange how does it do they approve of that i don't know but it feels like there's got to be some parameters set with

that right because we could hand a card back and forth to each other over 60 times so it has to be like i'm guessing a particular reason, a birthday card. Because we could exchange cards right now while we're doing this and break that world record. So there's got to be some parameters on it. Let's do it. I think one of my children came up with the idea that this card had been going back and forth

for so many years. Dreamer said she is now preparing to keep the tradition going by sending Wheaton the card coming up in May. Wisconsin residents Jackie Gembler and Evelyn Weir previously made headlines for a similar accomplishment exchanging the same two Christmas cards for 50 years.

And Doreen and Wheaton fucking crushed them! They're gonna double it at this rate. Get your fucking card out of here. That's just so happy, that friendship. It's gonna be really sad when one of them dies and it's like it comes time to do it and they're like they don't say they send it they send it but it never comes back oh that's sad it is sad but you have to remember the good times no i know the other 81 years i don't know i don't want to

remember that i want to feel sad i want everyone to cry. So, we've done this. I believe Cassie and I have done this. Just recently where someone gave us a gift. And it was kind of a funny gift. And then we just gave it back to them on their birthday. Just re-gifted it back to them. The exact thing they gave us. And then we expect to get it back sometime.

But we didn't have any use for it. Wait, you you didn't do it as a joke or no as a joke like we didn't like mistakenly do it we knew they gave it to us and we just wrapped it and gave it back to them like here you return it here you've with the receipt yeah here you guys fucking take back this crockpot you know we had five of them what are you doing um but i'm sure that's happened like with weddings like you just send the shit back to somebody accidentally sent back i mean we've read stories like that or gave it to somebody else and then they're like oh shit yeah i i gave one of those to betsy shit betsy gave it to me yeah that's how i got this this balloon toaster yeah really betsy gave it to you. Okay. Okay. Hope their marriage is going well.

About to go in that. All right. Well, it's a funny thing found on the internet. Zach, fuck. The internet is pretty wild. Depending on your browsing habits, you can either experience something super cool or go to prison. Crazy, right? Let's check it out together as a couple hey look what i found

yes going back to etsy continue the etsy run god it's fun over there so these joe yeah tell me about it you're a musician thanks kind of was not at least a washed up old fuck hey you left your guitar at my house buddy that's on you now oh yeah i did it's almost like i did it on purpose joe just has all of his instruments hanging on walls yeah like his house he's joking about his house being a museum because he's can't really live in it right now it's kind of like his whole music career is just a museum yeah it's just in boxes. It's all out there. Remember when I used to do something? Wrote this song

with this. My kids, they love looking up old videos of me when I was cool. We were just doing that before the show. Yeah, Ezra showed us that.

So those were boring now. I can't imagine how boring they were then. Oh, terrible. Check out Joe's cover of Wagon Wheel. It's pretty good. That's what Ezra was showing me when I first got here.

He also showed us the weather updates for Kootenai County. Anyway, do you ever... As being a musician, is it nice to be able to just take an instrument along with you? I've never, unless I'm traveling,

like back when I used to tour, or tour loosely, but just go around and play music. Yeah, I would travel with it. But I'm not a guy that just shows up and whips out an instrument. Okay. Well, you could be. I could be. I used to be that guy.

Pull the guitar out of the campfire and everybody's like. Really? At the RV. Before I was even good, too. Damn. Yeah, just walk up, like, taking a look at this baby, huh? At an RV show. It was an 18-footer.

To die is called way to die. You bought this RV. You know what goes well with this RV? To die. Be-be-be-be-be-be-be. Tune your guitar. Be-be-be-be-be-be. The rain throws off the tuning.

Makes my knee cramp up and makes my guitar out of tune. The thunderclaps are really covering how out of tune this G chord is. All right, let's get into this thing. We're beating around the bush. Okay. But you could be one of those musicians that, like, do you like to play harmonica? I used to. I have one for every key.

Oh, good. It's in a box somewhere. You got to carry them around. No one likes to do that. Like, you got to keep it in your pocket or something. Now you have stuff in your pocket. It's like I'm watching an infomercial. Yeah.

So, Joe, have you ever, but no, if you, do you have earrings or earrings? No piercings. Zach, do you have any piercings? A long time ago. Nose piercing or? They haven't really healed yet. Cock piercing or anything like that? I don't have a Prince Albert, no.

Well, you could carry around a harmonica in your ear for another area. Imagine a belly button. Like a little belly button harmonica. Yeah. But that's funny. So, yeah, these are harmonica earrings. I'm thinking about sexy time. Oh.

Because you like to lick a little. You know, you got to lick on the ear a little bit. She's got them in her ear and you're like. You start playing a blues traveler song. But anyway. I mean, these are tiny, but that's, I mean, that is really funny. Like what a cool thing to wear around. Because someone walking up and I'm just going, If the wind's blowing real hard, they just are musical as they're walking.

Yeah, just playing the whole thing. Oh, that is so funny. I wonder if they're heavy. But that is funny. They look like little pocket knives. Like miniature. Or USB. I might get my ear pierced if I could have a switchblade. Think TSA would catch a switchblade earring?

Yep. Fuck. I feel like that's something you could. Is there a rule against, like, if you had a tiny, like a tiny earring size switchblade, could you still get in trouble? Like you're sitting there fucking stabbing somebody, trying to take over an airplane. Like, I wouldn't even reach a vein, probably. And you're like, fucking stabbing somebody trying to take over an airplane like i wouldn't even reach a vein probably ow ow stop fucking the fat guy sitting next to you in the chair you're just like death by a thousand cuts he's not even waking up he's like what's the it's the guy that died on the plane that's what happened they threw the blanket over him

oh yeah that's right so you're just doing it for fun. You're letting the air out. Nice. Gross. The smell. 18 bucks for these harmonica earrings. Does that seem like a deal? I mean, what's more valuable, earrings or a harmonica? I don't know. I'm sure, I mean, the tiny, if I know the Etsy way of doing things, the harmonicas already exist. The tiny harmonicas exist. Actually, I know they do because I've had one.

I probably still do somewhere in a box when I used to be cool. It's just labeled on the outside. It's like when you used to be cool. You just open it up and all your cool shit's in there. And then Etsy, they just attach the earring part to the harmonica and then sell it for $18. It's ships from Ozark, Missouri. Okay. But that is a hell of a good idea. Also, it's in nine carts.

So we're not the only ones interested. No. Let's grab some. Come on. Hot product. Nine carts. So if you want some harmonica earrings, I'm assuming if you go to the internet and type in harmonica earrings, it's going to take you there. There's probably not a whole lot of retailers doing that no well this person says five stars adorable little harmonicas that are fully functional but not too heavy so they're they're functional and they're not too heavy so okay there you go in case you were wondering they're not too heavy i'm not gonna drag you down yeah all right are you ready to hear from the kids? Let's do it. Zach, please, if you'd be so kind. All right, let's hear what you guys think.

Really? You want to talk to me? Wow, that's cool. Want me to take this feller? That's a beast. First email coming in from our delivery son, Austin, who writes from your favorite FedEx driver. That's bold. Yeah.

Just right out the gate he's like, I am your favorite. You're not even fucking near me, dude. He probably is though. I don't know any other ones. If you deliver it here. Hey Big Daddy Joe. Lovely Uncle Comrade Zach. Hello. Comrade. Fuck you, Brian.

I'll get to you in a minute. I'll come back to you, bitch. I'll circle back you in a minute. I'll come back to you, bitch. I'll circle back around when I'm not so mad. This just happened and thought you guys would get a kick out of it. I decided to work last Saturday since my mother-in-law was coming to visit the newest grandchild in her flock. Now, I like her, but when someone comes to visit that lives 20 minutes away, how long do they stay? Well, this woman will stay for five to seven hours, and I just can't take that without saying something that will have my wife throw something at my head, and she's getting real accurate. You must say things a lot.

She's dialing it in. She hates you so much, she's just basically just jumping right into the majors. Yeah, she's like Roy Halladay with that control. So, I deliver in several small towns, and this week in particular was what we call in Indiana, fall-spring. You guys might have it in the Northwest, we sure do. Where you have a glorious week of 60 to 70 degrees out, when everyone is out and about enjoying it before Mother Nature slaps you in the face with her dick and gives you single digits and a snowstorm one last time before spring. We just had that happen about a week and a half ago. Yeah, it just snowed.

It was hailing really hard. Well, we put that trampoline together and then it snowed the next day. Well, I roll up to this house with a brother and sister outside with backpacks, blankets, and pillows to go sleep over somewhere. They were around 12. And as I step out, the boy starts yelling, Stranger danger! Jokingly and running behind the truck. I laugh and say, don't say that too loud. Then the girl looks at me and smiles like a sociopath.

She yells as loud as she can, Stranger danger! Someone help us! God. I just stand there stunned, looking around as everyone in the neighborhood is looking at the guy in a giant FedEx delivery truck and uniform. I just put the package down on the sidewalk, took my picture, and then got the hell out of there. I like the idea of him setting it down and then taking a picture of the kids. Are you going to get a picture of the package?

Nope, just these Stranger Dazies. This is the only package I taking a picture of the kids. Like, that's not going to help. Are you going to get a picture of the package? Nope. Just these Stranger Days. It's the only package I need a picture of. God, can we get all... You did it. I hate kids. No, you did. I hate kids, and I can't wait till my boy is old enough to pull that shit on my friends.

Now to Brian. Oh. Wow. Oh, here we go. I wrote in some time ago about some dumb lady walking into my FedEx truck and yelling at me. I remember that story. At the end, I asked if you could do your Jesse Ventura impression, which I love, and tell me a story about being down in the Baja. Well, you gave me one line, and since I just listened to the show, I assume you just stuck your thumb in your mouth and sat there with a dumb look on your face.

Joe even tried to give you hints like, I think you want a little more than that, bud, which I assume then you just grabbed your sippy cup and walked out. It's a great voice and you don't do it enough. You don't do enough of it. I agree. Dickhead,

at least touch a butthole and you'll see it's a magical place where all your dreams will come true. It's what I'm sure it comes from. Sure as hell not going to do it now. Sorry for the long email and rant about big baby Brian. Love the show. Don't hold your breath. Love the show. Wake up.

There's a gas leak. Yeah. So I'm not doing it. Who was it? I think it was Pepper. It might have been Ezra. I don't remember. It was just like the other night.

Walked by me and said that to me. What? I just went, wake up, it's a gas leak. Oh. Like out of nowhere. I just walked by in the kitchen. I just went, wake up, it's a gas leak. And I just kept going.

You freak. We laughed so hard when that was first said. It was very funny. That was so funny, yeah. Very funny. Someone just shared the little comic or whatever it was in the playground. Yeah. Oh, really? It was Alan in the Garbage Disposal, yeah. Oh, was in the, the playground. Yeah. It was,

it was Alan on the garbage disposal. Yeah. Oh, is it funny? Yep. Good joke. So anyway, Jesse Ventura,

he was not proud of you. Just giving him one line. Yeah. Well, he's going to get even less this time. You want to read the second email? Sure. Okay.

Should I do it? Jesse's voice. Yes. The whole thing. All right. Good. I can try it. Okay.

Our second email coming in from our scheduling genius son James who writes Hey Poppies I was listening to the earlier episode I'm trying to catch up. Joe was talking about how he recorded the Super Bowl a week early

and I have a short story for you since I was in the I was invited to a friend's it doesn't work it doesn't work for me to a friend's wedding and i made sure to put pto for that day i even had an invitation with me to make sure i took the right day off monsoon. I made sure my wife took the same day off so we could get together. Takes a lot, Adam. Well, the day finally came and my

wife got all ready. My wife in a beautiful new dress and I wore a brand new suit that I spent a lot of time looking for because it's hard to buy suits when you live in the Baja and you're fat and broke. Well, my wife looks at the invitation. I was a week early for the wedding.

I tried to take PTO for the next week, but I couldn't. So I whooped Monsoon's ass and I had to tell my friend what happened and he was pissed. So to this day, we still haven't talked to each other, but I think it's funny. Your obese son, Jesse, the body, James Ventura. Ventura. It is James. I'm all sweaty. That is funny.

You're all sweaty? I'm sweaty. I really had to quench the throat, monsoon. The monsoon thing is a wrestling reference. For the ones that don't know. If people don't watch wrestling in the late 80s, early 90s, that doesn't make sense. But for the ones who did, the monsoon. Because Gorilla Monsoon used to do commentary.

This friend needs to fucking get over it. Unless James is the one putting the stick in the sand and being like i'm not your friend if you won't fucking forgive me i'm gonna be honest i didn't and i didn't ingest any of the email because i was trying so hard on the voice to read and you nailed you read better as jesse maybe that's i need to be in a character the whole time you ever have on your own that's i jesse reads way better than brian well here so here's the thing i've said this before like also when i'm doing something for myself it's hard but when i'm a character i feel like i can say or do anything because it's not me saying it it's a character i feel that so

maybe i should stay in this yes yeah all right anyway he took off time from work and then went got all dressed up to go to a wedding And he was on the wrong week And that's a lot of That's a lot of time to take off I think if you were If either one of you or any friend In my life like fucked up

And missed my wedding because they Like literally thought my wedding Was a week earlier and fucked it all up I don't fucking care we were gonna be there fucking i don't but i don't care tossing a whole friendship over some fucking shit dude grow up yeah if i mean unless you had unless you were like you were officiating the wedding or something but just that might be an issue not going to the wedding i could see causing an issue like i'm not going to your wedding.

But you were all excited you were going to go. You just were on the wrong way. Even then, life is way more complicated than to get pissed off about that shit. Yep. Being like, you stop what the fuck you're doing and come to my big day! Let's just stop having big days for ourselves. Then we don't have to worry about people not showing up. You just suck all the

fun out of life. Here's what it is. Here's the thing. Here's what I'm talking about, monsoon. I think everyone puts all these expectations on these things so when there's a failure

it's like, what the fuck didn't you do that way? If you just don't worry about shit and then it's easier no one do anything no one do anything ever don't touch me don't look at me don't come over to my house nobody listen don't invite me anywhere yeah because then you won't be disappointed i don't show up right exactly if i'm gonna i'll show up but don't invite me because then i don't want to feel like I have to say no. Want to come on Jar soon? No.

Yeah, no, that was fun, actually. That was fun. I had a friend that bought a plane ticket to go on a trip and show up to the airport, and they bought the plane ticket for the week before that and missed it. I don't know why that's so funny to me. It's hilarious. It's hilarious. It's awesome. All the shit that goes into packing for a trip, and you get to the airport, and look at your ticket.

And they're like, you missed your fucking flight. It was last week. And you're just sitting there. Your car's parked. You're like, huh. Sorry, you're a week late. Like, there's nothing you can do. And he's like What?

He goes no And they look it up in the system And you stand there While like And then they see it And they look at you And you're standing there In your Hawaiian shirt

Hawaiian shirt Yeah Just got a tan I'm excited You got a spray tan? Mm-hmm It's like four in the morning And you're like

Oh man I changed all my money To pesos I'm ready to go Let's go And they're like And yeah man, I changed all my money to pesos. I'm ready to go. Let's go! And they're like, yeah, yeah, you just had to buy another fucking ticket. At the highest price imaginable. Of course. Because, you know, it's going to be $400 more than normal.

And just fucked it. Just fucked it. Just bought it a week early. Fucked it. Fucked it. People read shit funny. Because my mom-in-law did that the other day. She's like, I'm getting a dresser and it's only 56 pounds.

So if you guys want to bring it over. And then it was 56 kilograms, which is a hundred and some odd pounds. It was like, that's not even close. This is so heavy. It's a lot more. I, again, with the whole expectation thing, like I, a lot of times I'll, i'll read an email and i just not it's like you know when someone says hey i'm i'm jonathan when you meet and you're like you don't remember their name right after they told you the name i just do that with a lot of things i'll read something and

like just not ingest it for whatever reason because i just it just wasn't work doing it for me or something it was like something about it just wasn't doing it for me. Something about it just wasn't doing it for me. Let's get you on some Adderall. Or whatever. Without your knowledge. Yeah, we'll just put it in the coffee pot. Yeah, just come poke my dick with an Adderall needle. Oh, man.

A lot less people would be doing Adderall if you had a stick of... Maybe that's why we should change all the drugs to dick needles and then that'll really cure things no women would ever do i feel like i feel like uh heroin addicts would still do it oh yeah they're like poking in in their toes and everything i would stick a needle in my dick before like the webbing between my fingers or toes. All right, let's move off. We got to get on to the bonus shit.

If you have something you want to see on the show, you send that in to heyguys at canyoudontpodcast.com. Make sure to rate and review us. Sign up for Patreon for the bonus content that we'll be doing here in just a second. Again, got all that merch. If you want to be part of the merch giveaway, head over to canyoudontpodcast.com.

Big thanks to Uncle Zach for producing today's show and not making us pay $5 for every segment transition. I'm keeping a tally. Really appreciate that. It'll be a monthly charge. Check out what he does at scatcast.com and a big thanks to the babysitters that moderate the Can You Don't

Playground on Facebook. Alright, let's wrap it up. Zach! Good God. Wrap it up already, huh? All right, so this was sent in from our son, Nick. Nick the Dick. Nick the Dick. Brian, do you remember your first blowjob?

Yeah. Did you spit or swallow? Oh, yeah. I remember working the tip we know and your technique has not improved so hey why change something that works you know i mean i don't so my dad always just so i have a hard time believing that works i spit all right off to answer your question for you yeah yeah sure did all right bonus stuff do it