Can't Keep My Mouth Shut - Singapore: Losing all the GOOD Women because of the SHIT Men

Episode Date: March 27, 2023

I have had it with this negative narrative of men treating their women like rubbish.   I am fed up of women emigrating to other countries because they cannot find true love on this island, as the main stories that run on repeat is the women being f*cked over. These are high-value women too, being treated appallingly by absolute losers.   I. AM. OVER. IT. ​​  ​​​​For more awesome content to read including beauty, fashion or dating & love features, please do head over to my digital platform www.nixalina.com.   Don't be shy, come say hai! Head over to my Instagram or Tiktok to slide into my DMs.

This podcast contains strong language and discussions about relationships, sex and love. It may not be suitable for younger listeners. This is the Can't Keep My Mouth Shut podcast and I am Nick Salina. Hi everyone, back with another episode of me. And this one, ladies and gentlemen, riles me so much. I have been wanting to talk about it for like fucking ever. But I couldn't really quite find the words or enough anger or time had passed for me to really do it. But oh, let me tell you, the anger is here and we are ready.

This is called Singapore. Losing all of the good women because of the shit men. now before we begin i know for a fact that it is a global epidemic of shit men of toxic abusive men of men that ghost because they can't even be bothered to give you the dignity to say they're not interested of men that cheat of men that have all the addictions under the sun including fucking hookers. Hi, ex-fiancé, I'm looking at you. And I understand it's not just Singapore, and I get that. I also want to say before I begin is that I know it's not just men. Women suck too, okay? So I know this is a sweeping, stereotypical kind of episode,

But it's also fucking true. All right. So don't worry about what it's like in London or Bali or New York or Dubai. I get it. Shit men are everywhere. I get that. And shit women too. But specifically, I want to talk about living on this damn island. Hello, Singapore. I love you. Yes, I love you. But the men, not so much. So basically, I am fed up, fed up of hearing fucking stories about men treating their woman appallingly. And it seems to be like Singapore somehow houses the worst of the worst. And what's happening, and I'm talking across the board, like locals, expats. Women are leaving the island, good women, women that are strong, intelligent, attractive, caring, kind. These women are leaving to find love elsewhere because it

feels like the narrative here is that you will get fucked over. I have so many, and this is why I feel like I can say this because of what I do and how I've been doing it for so long. I have so many stories, DMs from strangers, friends of friends, my friends, old and new. I have so many stories of these beautiful creatures, these women that are just, just lovely women being royally hurt by their partners. And these men cheat. They frequent brothels or they suddenly disappear or they've secretly got another girlfriend. Or they just use, just one night stands, pretend they want something when they eventually get sex and like nasty later. And it's just such a damaging fucking narrative. And I don't get it. I don't get it. For instance,

my personal, personal experience. I'm going to sound like a cunt and I don't care. When I first met my fiance, part of me thought, you're punching with me. You will never cheat. I genuinely thought that. I wasn't enamored by how he looked. I thought I was falling for his character and the way we had laughs together and the connection we had. But like, he's a four out of 10 back home, I'm pretty sure, right? No, he cheated on repeat and he frequented Orchard Towers behind my back even after proposing. Yep, yep, yep. He proposed to me and fucked hookers. Now, I'm not saying he wouldn't do that, you know, backing where he fucking crawled out under the rock, wherever he came from I'm not saying he wouldn't do that in his own country but it just feels like it's a more

open fucking thing here and also dude you're four out of ten you were already punching with me and this is what I think is the problem right I think that these men across the board I'm not just I'm not I'm not talking generalizing with expats I just mean men in general, they become insecure with themselves if they manage to bag a woman who is beyond them. Or perhaps she's more successful. Perhaps she is more intelligent. Perhaps she has a better body. Perhaps she's, you know, facially better looking, whatever it is. If a guy manages to bag this prize, for some reason, rather than honoring her, loving her, treating her well, it delves into his insecurities and his soft ego and his damaged masculinity and he has to treat

her badly to make himself feel better that's what i think is the fucking problem my fiance knew he bagged someone beyond his means and that he was a pathological liar and that i fell in love with the lie and so to make himself feel better that one day i'll probably leave when i discovered how atrocious he was he would just constantly cheat and lie to me some more and treat me badly and that way when I do leave it's like okay because you know he fucked around so it's all right it's almost like some sort of internal damage control for their fragile self I don't know I don't fucking know this is what I can only assume because the stories I hear I even heard one last week before. These women, I'm like, if I meet the men or see the men online or

whatever, and I'm like, are you fucking serious? Like, you must have a huge dick or really good personality because I don't understand. And they still cheat and treat their women badly. Fucking raging. I'm honestly raging about it. Now, listen, in London, my whole of my 20s, did I manage to find a good guy? Well, no, I didn't. So is the epidemic Singapore based or is it a global modern day society wanker man? Potentially. Yeah. Is it Nick Salina only fancies the wrong ones? Could be. But if it was Nick Salina based only, how comes I'm hearing these stories left, right and centre? How comes you are all coming to me daily, daily in need of help? Because you've heard something I spoke about and it resonates with you. You are in a toxic

relationship. You are physically abused. Your guy has done this. You think he's cheating. I hear it all the time. I'm saturated with this fucking narrative. And honestly, it's destroying my idea of finding that good guy or finding the one because I'm like, it just seems like it doesn't exist anymore. Why? And more importantly, what's happening in Singapore is these good women they're leaving I hate that one of my friends um she's moved to Bali she's a local Singaporean and she's found love immediately and she's happy as a pig and shit and yet when she was in Singapore she really struggled and was you know just treated quite badly so I think and then my other girlfriend she's moving back to London because she was treated badly here

it just saddens me because I got to be honest with you I am now in that boat so last year was it last year I'm losing my fucking years when I did leave the fiance I was like I need to just leave Singapore I can't be here I just can't be here because there's no happy ending with a man that you meet here I feel like lots of people come into Singapore with a partner and that works out or I don't know I'm hoping there's some happy stories if someone can prove me wrong that would make me happy and this is the first time in my life I want to be proven wrong please please prove me wrong with some fucking fairy tale story where people matched in Singapore they met in Singapore and the guy was loving and decent and loyal and honest and there was no ghosting and

there was no abuse and there was no lying and there was no cheating and there was no manipulation and there was just happy ever after someone come forward please I need to hear it because I am in that boat where I think the longer I stay the older I get the further away I get from meeting my partner from having the children like you know come on guys I'm fucking turning 36 I want the family I want the husband I don't want the husband to be alcoholic cunt who lies to me every day and goes to orchard towers and fucks his hookers and then says he fell asleep for two hours on the pavement outside and then comes home and has a shower and then tells me to get out of his house don't want that no no no I don't want that I want healthy happy normal guy and I've

done my healing before you go maybe it's you no no and maybe have a type no this one the fiance is the opposite of my type like I said four out of ten at best what I used to date models in London like stunning stunning stunning men okay and some of us we're still really good friends it's not like they were assholes we're really good friends this one was my well at least he won't cheat because look who you know let's have a comparison oh and I know I sound really arrogant but oh yeah I am pretty much a box ticker in London I would be asked out every time I went out Like, sure, I didn't have, to be fair, I did. I did have long-term relationships and obviously they ended, but I don't regret them.

I don't necessarily think all of the men are assholes at all. They just, certain things happened, you know, throughout my 20s and it didn't work out. But I was always hit on. Always. Or I used to go out with my girlfriend and we'd go into a club and I'd see someone. I'd be like, oh my God, look at him. Yeah, that's the one. and by the end of the night, I'd leave with his number

and I'd have a date lined up. Does that happen in Singapore? Does it? Fuck. I can go out every day of the week. My liver, my kidneys wouldn't appreciate it, but I could and I would not get hit on. I don't understand.

It's like, and it's not only me. It's the narrative. Like, it's almost like the guys, I don't know, do you have too much choice? are the men here is this like Singapore does it just try broken men or something or is this now globally what it's like is there been a power shift in that men now want the women to chase them men now seem to play it cool is it the introduction of the apps and the social media like oh okay well I don't need to like go and actually talk to anyone or flirt with

anyone because I can go and pick up a shag if I want easily swiping on tinder or you know I can pay a hooker oh yuck but god whatever it is is that the thing I don't get it I do not understand but I do understand that it's so common now it needs to be talked about and obviously I'm the girl to talk about it because I'm fucking raging I also don't like the idea that women have to leave their homes and their jobs like for me like I said last year I was considering going how am I going to fucking find someone here what happened actually was if you're thinking well why haven't you left is because firstly I got two babies my third babies I need to consider and they'd have to fly and that's going to be a whole ordeal if anyone knows how clingy gizmo is imagine

putting on a flight for 13 hours. Also, I love Singapore. I fucking love my life in Singapore. I love everything about it. And like, I was broken and healing and sad thinking I need to move, I need to move. And then as I got over what he put me through, and as I understood, it said nothing about me and says everything about him. And as the more and more cheating came about, the more dirty stories that became uncovered and people came forward telling me all this stuff about him the more I realized that like I don't want to leave my life for a fucking man are you serious no thank you so I didn't want to run I didn't want to run from heartbreak I wanted to stay and fight through it and that is exactly what I did I thought I fought through it

am I considering leaving because I don't foresee meeting anyone yes it is still on my mind and the more stories I hear of all these women I know doing the same it does make me feel like I should follow suit but I once again do I want to leave my life in Singapore to chase love when maybe I go to London and the arsehole epidemic is there as well. New York, Sydney. I had one of my girlfriends in London who is from Singapore, by the way, leave me a voice note the other day saying, oh, it's happened again. This guy's done this, this and this and this and this. What the fuck is going on? She's in London. Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. Like, I feel you. I totally feel you. and she is stunning she's so stunning like i can't look directly at her she's so beautiful

she's bilingual she is active she ah she's like a you know influencer but an actual an actual influencer and she's fucking awesome and the kindest soul and she's been screwed over left right and center but she doesn't want to consider moving back to singapore on the basis of like the narrative is that men are so fucking shit here so she's stuck as well like I'm experiencing rubbish in London but then you know if I move back then you know oh I could talk about this for hours guys luckily it's only been 15 minutes but yeah I don't know what to do I don't know how to fix this and I don't understand how it fucking started all I know is that left right and center women locals expats just women in general are leaving are moving away because they want to find

real love and for some reason it doesn't seem to be happening in Singapore they are moving away because they've had their heart broken because they're fed up of back-to-back crappy dates of being ghosted they're moving away because they can't bear being cheated on one more time or finding out there's another girlfriend or there was a wife and kids they didn't know about they're moving away because they want to find a space where they are appreciated where they are hit on where they are flirted with where they are seen as the prize it just feels like all of these 10 out of 10 women have been demoted to like 2 out of 10 at best I just don't get it

God, I feel so much better having got that all off my chest. That was very cathartic for me. Please come forward with your thoughts. Where are you in the world? And what experiences do you have? Please come forward and prove me wrong. People in Singapore, I need love stories. You've got to lift my soul up at this point, okay? I need heartwarming, loving butterfly feeling long-term love stories that's what I need I need someone somebody out there to make me believe in real love again and give me hope that I will find love in Singapore and that is the end of this episode I can't wait to hear all of your thoughts and comments as always slide into my dms i'll be on instagram and tiktok at nixalina n-i-x-a-l-i-n-a and i'll see

you all next week thanks for listening to the can't keep my mouth shut podcast produced and hosted by me nixalina i'm recorded in the splice car studios in singapore i'm available to listen to on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, and all major podcast listening apps. Do subscribe to enjoy a new episode every Monday evening. Please do give me a five-star review. It helps other people also find my podcast. For more content and features to read, you can check out my website, nixalina.com. That's nixalina.com. I'm also on social media. Simply search at Nixalina, N-I-X-A-L-I-M-A to find me

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