Chubby Behemoth - Dumping Concrete

Episode Date: February 18, 2021

Coffee Comrades. Who Sat That Kid? We Miss You Pablo. Janae Burris.   Nathan Lund and Sam Tallent are Chubby Behemoth.   Extra Episodes at https://www.Patreon.com/chubbybehemoth

Look at your hair. It's all, last time I saw you, was it gone or was your beard gone? I mean, maybe both. I shaved my head for the UMS last year when Christy and I hosted virtually. We, you know, they were raising money to give to artists, bands, and we had these different goals, you know, that we were hoping to meet. And I had been, there were a couple of times where I was just so hot last summer, just very warm. And so I thought about cutting my hair before the UMS gig. And then when they were like, what kind of goals, you know, what fun stuff could we do and i was like i'll shave my head and so we did that and so yeah it's been growing back since then so maybe like those seven months it's getting pretty long i haven't cut it since then wow and then the beard yeah the beard is getting long i i was getting sick of having a long beard because you know they're pubes they're like you know long scraggly pubic hair on well pubic hair is like actually

good for friction but facial hair is gross so you're right well so i think facial hair is a lesser hair so if you have gross pubic hair, you should say, ew, they're like facial hairs. They're like a beard. Yeah. The pubic hair serves a purpose. The beard hair is just, it's, it's, it's not really a choice, an active choice or stylistic choice as much as it's just inaction. You know, the upkeep is tough, but I was keeping it relatively short so that it didn't get to that long when there's like the two inks in the beard hair that make it look like it's definitely a pube like a long pube I was avoiding that stage uh until just these last few months I just kind of I kind of wanted

to grow out the mustache but the mustache gets very blonde yeah And so the mustache is tough for me on its own. So I kind of have to do beard or nothing. And I'm, I mean, I'm not looking to shave every, I don't need that to be one of the only activities on my agenda every two days is got to get in there, shave your beard. Yeah. I hate shaving. So I decided to stop pressing, to stop commenting on men's beards because it's like, it's not fun to shave. All right. So I'm sure it's not fun to shave your face constantly. So, you know.

I mean, it's even how awful to think of all of the surface area that women can end up shaving over the course of their lives. It's hard. I have shin hairs coming pretty fast and furiously now. Used to be like one a month, but now it's like, it's just constantly three. Every time I turn around, there's another three. I understand. I feel your pain. So I understand. I feel your pain. I'm reminded of a time.

Do you know Maggie O'Shea? She's a comic. She plays ukulele. And she used to come through Denver like kind of often, regularly. You might know her if you saw her. But I just remember one of the times she came through town, she got a spot. I think it must have been New Talent Night because I think it was before Thick Skin was a thing. But she was at Comedy Works. I think

it was a Tuesday. She got a set. And she was doing well. She's very funny. Is she tall? No, she's not tall. She's not super short, but she's kind of short. Don't go by me because I just have a bad memory that's all yeah well a lot of comics coming through denver but she uh

she was like hopping trains and hitchhiking and stuff she was like a nomad uh for a long time she's in arizona now but anyway she was on stage and was doing great was killing it and then at some point she like you know lifted her arm she was wearing like a dress and she lifted her arm and she had some armpit hair and the crowd gasped in such a it's such a fucking annoying way you know as if yeah oh for real like as if she as if they saw the scarlet letter burned onto her body. And then a glass drops just like. Oh, yeah, yeah. Someone faints.

A man says, foul beast. You know, I couldn't believe it. Denver at a comedy club where you're going to see some, you know, you're going to hear these random people, you know, say some of the craziest shit you could ever imagine. And they're drinking on a Tuesday night. As soon as they get to judge. Oh my God, did you see that?

She's wearing a dress. She knew she was going to wear that dress. She wanted us to see. She's a pervert. Yeah, she is not reformable uh yeah it was hilarious i haven't been shaving a lot because of the you know nobody's seeing me but then the smell for me started to get pretty bad i'm a spicy smelling lady so you know hair holds smell so it just after a couple weeks it's like you must i must shave i have to for myself because i couldn't sleep i was like yeah i don't care

about the look of it it's the smell though sure well we have we have kind of a i think i we have it we're in an old place in trinidad here and, uh, the, the shower doesn't, uh, stay hot all the time. So I, you know, you kind of have to pick weird hours to, to, to try to use the shower. Cause I think there's enough other people that live in other units using, you know, this one like old water heater. So I've been trying to shower at weird times but because it's not like a great you know nice shower every time that's gonna uh with and the pressure is not that great so sometimes when i will finally go take a shower is when i'm trying to go to bed and i'm like man that's i'm not gonna i don't want to smell that now i don't want to smell that in the morning with my own smell i can't sleep

yeah and uh yeah all the hair i mean just everywhere i've tried i tried uh to to nair my butt and my lower back years ago like in uh college i was like oh i gotta take my shit to the next level okay you don't have to say it was college. It was recent. It was college. Okay. I experimented with Nairn college. I was like, this is not worth it. Cause it's just,

and, and so since then, I, I feel like that maybe either made it come back a little stronger. It bounced back or it was going to happen anyway, but either way it does, it does contribute to just a, a-like ecosystem in your crotch. So you've got to be careful. And I'll

shave my pits to ensure that I'm less likely to get that same ecosystem up there. I like getting rid of that hair. I usually don't shave all the way. I'll trim it down so that it's there's still a little bit of the trapping but without the Becca's making like a face like is this I thought you were like shaving

shaving armpits just sounds like a nightmare oh yeah you gotta be careful mine don't grow long enough they grow like my eyebrows just barely but just enough to get smelly my eyebrows just barely but just enough to get smelly yeah i just also you have to like pick a place to stop yeah really well yeah we have like you know arm hair that's like pretty dark and like it kind of connects at the edge

okay yeah becker's like robin right becker's like robin williams you know just hair more hair than man i do feel like if you enjoy someone and you enjoy their pheromones and all that stuff that the hair is not so much a problem if you like just like a person and all their scales and warts and things and it's like sure you can have hair as you want. No big deal. Yeah, that helps. I know that I got less ashamed or felt like my smell was not as bad once I quit drinking and once I quit using aluminum deodorant. I think I was using Degree that one of the ones that still has the aluminum in there i think that's what i'm using i don't know i i stopped i stopped using all deodorant for like a few years and just kind of smelled how i smelled and tried to shower enough

to to make sure it didn't get real bad and then uh now i try to use i use brute i found a little i think a brute because it reminds me of my dad no it's just deodorant it's not like what do you call it anti-perspirant so right it's like i sweat through the brute and then it's like oh now you smell like a sweaty man nice like i smell like bold and smelly yeah brood is uh brood's definitely a dad smell my dad would have like brood or uh old spice and i didn't like aqua velva i don't know if he had aqua velva he might have had some polo but like i didn't like the musky. Like when I was in high school, I wanted like chrome or cool water because they did not. Cool water. Cool water.

Me and Snoop Dogg were in cool water. You and Snoop Dogg and everybody at my high school and everybody at the Fox Hills Mall. Yeah. Cool water. There were those that weren't. Well, those didn't smell like my dad or like, you know, it wasn't a dad smell. It was like the opposite. You know, I wasn't trying to smell like my dad or like, you know, it wasn't a dad smell. It was like the opposite. You know, I wasn't trying to smell like a dad.

I was trying to smell like a cool little wave of water. And I think there was another, my favorite one. I can't remember what it was, the name of it, but it was like maybe an Armani, Gio. Yeah. My brother-in-law has so much cologne he's he's haitian i think i'm like i'm it's it's a lot he like buys like really expensive colognes but he's got that aqua aqua de joe and he's got the um all of them all of the ones you know it's like they're for occasions for him because they bring back such memories, you know, sense memory. But it's like, I feel like my nose has changed. I can't be smelling all that cologne anymore.

Like, there's no cologne that I really, really want to smell anymore. like no well i think i think a lot of people get over it and you start to just smell like a some assemblage of of chemicals you don't smell you know like you i don't know but i i got to that point too where i thought they all smelled bad and they because they were all too they're all too strong and nobody wears the right amount right there. It's hard to, I mean, guys especially don't just put on a little so that when you get close, you smell it. They put it on so that as soon as they enter the fucking bar, everybody knows, you know, everybody looks at who smells like that. And they're like, all right, we're going to keep a radius from that fucking asshole. Yeah, like it gets on you and in your mouth but yeah once you i think yeah once you kind of get you you can get past that uh as being an acceptable chemical smell and like a good smell and you just you

just smell like science you just smell whatever the fuck is going into that to make it smell that way i used to love it when andy when when he and i first well when i first met so long ago he was my boss he wasn't my boss at first he was just like a new manager coming to work and then when we started to hang out and i started to like him i could smell when he got to work he used to wear he used to wear acts and i was super into it oh boy this is not long enough ago to i wasn't 14 either it was like i was too old to be like oh feeling like in the like stairwell and you see her right yeah you connected the smell to him so then it's's like, yeah, it's a good thing. Now I like this powdery, cocoa-y, whatever the fuck it is, out of an aerosol can. He only wore it to cover cigarette smells. He's not even like a cologne-wearing dude.

He just covers the cigarettes. But I was like, I also like the smell of like cigarettes being covered up kind of. I was like, Adrian Mason did have a great cologne that i loved though okay so adrian mason had a really good smell and you're saying the the cigarettes in the mix of that good smell didn't make it worse it just kind of added it's something i it actually enhances it for me the smell right tobacco and some sort of cologne if you have the right cologne it's weird it's weird but they do make like tobacco smelling like men's scents like it's a it's a masculine scent i guess yeah i think i was also probably in some of my prime baby making years when i met andy and i was

just like i love it there's a man around that is a man There's a man around. That is a man. That's a man with at least one penis, maybe even two. He's going to take care of me. He's looking good. I've seen him. He's looking tan, fishing on a boat and living it up in Florida. You can say it's tan. I say it's burnt.

He looks pretty burnt a lot of the time. But I've seen some pictures where he's not burnt, where he's kind of tan. Have you? I think so. Maybe it's the some pictures where he's not burnt, where he's kind of tan. Have you? I think so. Maybe it's the filter. Maybe he's not burnt. Oh, Becker's taking a five. You're on the clock right now, Becker.

Becker is, yeah, we call it multitasking. He's, yeah, he's. I'm like a Watu the watcher. I'm just here to make sure everything goes as planned. I'm going to watch you and take care of you right now. Like, make sure you're okay. I'm just free. I'm freebasing hash. I'm going to watch you and take care of you right now. Make sure you're okay. I'm just free. I'm freebasing hash. I'm perfect.

Yeah, freebasing. That's what that is. Yeah, what's his name? Louis Martina is calling weed dabs. No, not weed dabs. That's what they actually are. what does he call it uh oh he calls smoke freebasing coke uh coke dabs instead of smoking crack anyway that's a

lewis martinez joke i wouldn't have ever thought i would have missed that guy but i know did you have him on the show or something i always thought it was funny like i don't know his wildness i thought was hilarious i don't know what all you can do with that type of uh comedy but as an audience member it always tickled me i'd open mics and things yeah i i think he's like a lot of the the the characters in denver comedy where it's like i was excited to see somebody that was definitely their own person as opposed to a lot of the comics that are trying to figure that out by maybe

mimicking or taking parts of successful comics and trying to make that you know part of their thing I don't know how I also liked Vic G so what do I know Vic G and I have had some really good conversations I think running an open mic

you don't you don't just see him as like preventing you from getting up there earlier you know you just see him as a common yeah you're gonna be there anyway and then he as long as man

I mean there were some times where he definitely would go long and be too angry. But then, I don't know, we had some good conversations where it was like, okay, yeah, he's not always out of his mind. Sometimes he was a relatively normal, somewhat stable guy, and we could have some good talks. He's very well read. So we talked a lot about like shakes he's read like all shakespeare plays and is knowledgeable but and has like skeezy hookups on books that don't even make sense he he comes into mutiny with books to sell me like a week before they come out oh shit it fell off the back of a truck yeah but like it's that has cracked me

up for like two years. You're such a good skis ball. You're even skeezy at getting books. I always love to see him wander up every six months. Oh, he's still alive. Guy, he's still alive. All right. Well, yeah.

Yeah, that's part of it, too, is to know, yeah, at least doing okay enough to carve out some time to go do a mic yeah uh how much how much comedy have you done in the last year have you tried to do some zoom stuff have you done it i'm doing a lot of zoom shows actually okay i'm the zoom. I'm not any better at it after almost a year, though. I was like, you've gotten worse at this. I was like, killing it at one point. I was like, I got this down everybody. I don't know why everybody's

complaining. I am killing it. And now, in the last couple months, I've been real embarrassed. Like, oh, you suck, dude. Because I think early on, i just still wanted to and now i'm at a place where i'm like what is life what is this why is this like like the adjust the the newness of it hid some of the badness of it and now it's just the badness like the raw

the reality it's the reality of reality is hitting it's like comedy why the fuck are we still doing the shows you guys this is insane even though i need it i need like some sort of outlet and way to perform and you know sometimes they pay like you i just was i was listening to you and sam talk about you know you being bingo king and i wanted to call you um last week was i doing a show but but i was just like don't just call him for bingo jokes janae don't be an asshole and i was like just remember the jokes he gave you before come on uh yeah i've yeah i've already given you some of that gold i only remembered oh 69 i did a big deal about 69 every time with these college kids but i did a two-hour bingo um maybe a week or two ago um and they had a good time you know but the great

thing about a college bingo is just call the fucking numbers and yeah give out the prizes and that'll be great but i kept people engaged and they turned their cameras on and they told me that the kids don't usually turn their cameras on so that was cool um but i've done a lot of zoom shows and other platform shows and sometimes i am not the best person i've i i was grateful leon to get uh from you know when jake brown and samantha taylor were doing their shows they had like some tips and one of the first things was you should stand up if you're gonna perform like have your and you just got a standing desk which which is probably, you know, the best move because it's weird to sit and be on a computer and then try to do what you used to do standing on a stage. I was appreciative of that.

I haven't done a bunch of, I haven't, I haven't tried to do Zoom shows. So sometimes I'll be like, man, why haven't I been asked to do any Zoom shows as if I'm supposed to be courted and headhunted and it's like yeah no why don't you send some fucking booking emails. I mean I haven't sent any booking emails for Zoom. I think I'm getting Zoom shows because I'm on Zoom shows. Yeah. So people are seeing me do it and I do try

to share and you know not to give the appearance that I'm busy but just to do the thing that we always did was like best promotion for yourself is to show people that you're still you still exist and you're still working and you still want to work so um that's how I keep getting zoom shows um but I did learn to stand that's why I like at Marina's place she has like a bar and she's got like a cool painting and I set myself up in front of that and um make it a party I also hold the mic sometimes um i learned that i don't need to plug it in um plugging it in

was weird you know with sound sometimes it was inconsistent but if you just hold the mic it gave me like muscle memory and it if you look on the grid you know you see this is the entertainment right here i also do a lot of this. What are you guys doing back there? Extreme close-up. I'm in your room. I can see that stain on your mattress. Look at that. You could have sat there, but you wanted me to see it.

I wanted to have that show at the beginning of the quarantine. That was one of my early quarantine ideas was Room Roasters. Definitely imagined you on that show. Did I pitch it to you? You did, and I felt like I couldn't. I didn't want people to make fun of. You wanted people to see your room, but it was like, I don't want people to see my room either.

We're going to see their rooms. Oh, yeah, the audience? Yeah, Room Roasters have Jake volunteer and then show us his room. It's like, you know, like C like cribs but i just roast their rooms i had a school of ideas back then i liked the idea of of making fun of people's rooms but like i was telling you like a lot of our decorations a lot of our setup was like my you know megan's doing so they would have been roasting her choice in art or her, you know, whatever, clothes. So I... We were going to get out other people.

So the comedians didn't have to roast each other's rooms. The comedians just roasted, like I would recruit some audience or something. Or like show me your roommate's setup if they're not there or whatever. Because I too was feeling like I don't want people all up in my business to see that I literally live in a bedroom. I was, yeah, you just made me think I definitely would have wanted to roast your old

roommate's bathroom. That dude, uh, Ryan, I could have, uh, torn his bathroom apart. That guy.

So busy telling other people how that, how they should live, but he can't, you know, clean his toilet ever. That fucking douche i couldn't believe it he's so successful but he also had you and andy as roommates you know like why don't you get your own place since you're you know i don't know what's going on in his life right now

um i i keep him as a facebook friend because i don't think you've got to we shouldn't down all of our trump friends i want to know what they're talking about and what they're listening to. But yeah, I was like, did you get some sort of promotion since we last talked or what? Cause you blowing it up. Like you really in this tax bracket. That's like, you know, like you really doing it. I didn't want to like directly insult him, but I was just like, I feel like you're giving the appearance of some Uber success when he was there, like the brightest guy I knew.

He was driving for Uber. Secret. No. That was his secret. Yeah. He's like sales stuff. I don't know. Windows or some shit.

Exciting. Yeah. He was always annoying. He'd make it sound like it was so easy and it's like okay what's your story because i'll bet he worked for his dad's friend or something you know his dad's college roommate uh you know owned a dozen car dealerships and so he started you know by washing cars and then after two months he got he got to be on the floor i don't know he just it was so weird for you to live with this guy that was the opposite of any of your friends. You know, anything that we stood for was in direct defiance of this dude that you had.

I didn't know that. I didn't know that. Not right away. Yeah. He was young. He was young. But when I really looked at him, when the Trump shit really started to hit early on, I was like, oh my God, you're a poster child for it. You are exactly who they're recruiting right now.

He's like a 28 year old white guy grew up like middle-class upper middle class. And he wants what his father had and he wants what his grandfather had. And he believes that he's entitled to those things. And these goddamn Mexicans are stealing his shit. You know? Yeah. If it weren't for these damn croatians and salvadorans and any

it's the only way they know about uh the countries of the world people ought to work for what they you can't just come to this country and take and it was just like one of those ideas started when trump started trump started to embolden him so that he can really talk about those things and perhaps he had more friendships where they talked about those things and i don't know that he can really talk about those things. And perhaps he had more friendships where they talked about those things. And I don't know that he truly understand understood that you can't think that way and expect to keep your other friends group. Cause he had a mixed group of friends of young people. And when his early like support for Trump was coming out,

he had some friends like not be his friends anymore. Yeah. He, he went from going out five nights a week. Hey, I'm going to meet the fellas. I'm going to meet up with the wolf pack. We're going to go have some brews. And then he was like, Oh yeah, me and Derek are going to go hang out. And then Derek stopped talking to him. Yeah. Some people stopped talking to him. I remember when his feelings were heard about it and it was like, well, yeah, bro. Like, you know, you're supporting this, the wrong know you're supporting this the wrong side you're on

the wrong side of history right now so you're on the wrong team yeah but he was so young and impressionable that like he was it's the the campaigning that trump was doing was designed for him when i used to joke when he was he one time i saw him leave with like his gun case like his gun box and these two dudes that i had never met who had shaven heads oh boy that's happening right now usually his stoner friends would and snowboarder friends would you know be like oh i'm freddie like they would like yeah engage and these guys like were in and they avoided eye contact and they carried out you know some heavy ass guns and shit i didn't know he had so many guns and i was like yo i was like am i gonna see you on the news with khaki pants and a tiki torch or what and it was all jokey jokey but i was like uh i said when they come looking for you i'm gonna tell them the things i saw just so you know like

when they come i'm gonna go shit i knew it right god damn i'll get a cover for you you know he's different when he introduces you as his roommate's girlfriend instead of yeah i'm his roommate's girlfriend so um yeah he was falling in with it was almost like he was falling in with the other crowd though so they kind of i don't think he fully went trumper on his own i do feel like he was influenced and encouraged like come on that feels destiny bro you white man take what's yours oh yeah just all that stuff yeah all that stuff that i was just thinking about how it's funny that some of these people in the same breath could say, my grandma, my grandpa, you know, came over here from wherever with nothing and worked hard. And then when that same story is happening all around them, they act as if those people aren't doing it the right way.

You know, like they, oh, no, well, this was different because this was my family and it's like okay and and they try to say that shit about uh you know they did it the right way because they became citizens and it's like okay well what if it didn't really you know what if they stopped making that happen as much if there's less uh access to that the right way then you know the reason for coming over doesn't slow down it's like oh okay then i guess i'll then you know the reason for coming over doesn't slow down it's not like oh okay then i guess i'll just you know keep getting killed over here where i'm living right now it's insane there's uh and yeah it's funny when there's young people that will act as if oh yeah don't we all do this where it's like we're all on different teams strictly based on what race we are but not not really strictly once you're white.

It doesn't really matter what type of white you are. You're on that team. And it's like, that's the simplest, weirdest way for us to try to go about getting anything done is through, you know, we don't have anything in common, but we look similar to one another. So that's good enough for me. It's like, how is that? Megan just, Megan's been working at the Starbucks here.

It's in a Safeway. And, you know, we knew that there were going to be a bunch of random people coming up. And I just hoped that she would avoid some of the, you know, dumbest, craziest, most racist of them. But this dude came up to her and, you know, before he orders, he's like, Oh, what, what's going on here? You got your masks on, huh? Or no, she has, she has to get her temperature taken.

And then there's like a little sticker she has to put on that shows that she's like, you had a temperature check. And he was like, Oh, what's that there? And she was like, Oh, just shows that I had my temperature checked. And he was like, yeah. Okay. So you do that. And then immediately you just start shaking hands with all your comrades. And she was like, okay, what? You know, the coffee comrades. And then said something about her mask and was like, man, the only reason we have this COVID thing going on is because we freed the slaves and she was like okay i'm not gonna serve you now you know and it just was like why why does this crazy why is this crazy that's not even a i'm into conspiracy theories but those are not connected and i do think most

things in this country connect to slavery but whoa whoa, what a leap. Oh yeah, he just ignored about 200 years of details and was just like, nope, there's one line and it goes from pandemic to the Emancipation Proclamation slash Juneteenth. I mean, he doesn't know. You're going to find a lot of people that say most of the bullshit in the country is connected to slavery.

But not that. Just not that one. A lot of the bad things came from that tradition and the and the the the fallout and then he is going the other way and he's like no no that was the start of something bad and we haven't been able we broke a curse uh or you know or we we we started uh down the wrong path when we decided to try to treat everybody better. And I was hoping that he did not live here, and she hasn't seen him again. So I'm hoping he was just passing through. Right.

It's such a small town that's like, you're going to run into people. And most people seem to be relatively like low key here, whether if they're wearing a mask, if they're not there. I did see there was a couple in Walmart, they had no masks, and then their gun on their hip. And then the woman was wearing some ridiculous shirt, like, Jesus, please protect all the cops, you know, and it was like, Oh, God, she was kind of a character but but most people are have not been like loud in their support of trump or their hatred of of you know cucks or whatever liberals yeah yeah i haven't haven't seen too much of that uh so that's been a relief because i think a lot of the people that are here that have been here for a long time are either hippies or like artsy, you know, so they're not all cowboys. A lot of

them I think are, have just had families that have lived here for a long time. And so they're still here and they just kind of want, you know, they want to be able to go hiking or ride a bike or whatever. And they're not full of hate. I'm hoping there's not good radio reception down here, so a bunch of them haven't been able to hear some of the shit that's been on. They didn't hear Rush Limbaugh? Yeah, they don't know. That'll be my litmus.

I'm like, oh, man, did you hear about Rush Limbaugh? And if they're like, who? I'll be like, oh, nobody. I actually meant to say another person's name and I misspoke. Never mind. It seems like a really cute place. I mean, Wally, I know Wally is promoting a lot and putting it in a good light,

but it's like the idea that it's, you know, it's out there and it's a little away from the chaos sounds really nice. Yeah also you know i'm gonna say because you went there it really makes me look at it yeah we're not for you well we're not for you i might not think i mean i like you so i i assume that you're doing cool shit well the main thing for me was without comedy keeping me in denver because like it made made sense to be in denver megan and i uh would have probably tried to find a different apartment and to to change things up uh but i still would have wanted to be in or right near

denver so that i could keep doing standup. And without that, it was like, all right, well, don't really need all of these fucking people to, uh, potentially from other people. So you were what? I was hogging the bathroom office.

Oh, okay. Somebody, somebody needed to take a call in there. Somebody's showering right next to you now. And there's other great parts about Trinidad. Like it's big enough for 20,000 people, but it's only got 8,800 in it.

Yeah. Yeah. This is not. What's the rent like? I mean, I was, I was able to buy a house on mutiny wages so you fucking bought a house yeah i close next thursday damn yeah okay wait what

yeah well yeah so it's it they've had some booms and some busts over the last like 80 years and uh they're starting to be a little interest down here so prices are starting to come up but a lot of uh like our apartment was 600 and then for the previous uh couple and then our landlord was like we're gonna we'd like to start charging 650 and it was like that's fine because it's not 1475 a month plus. So yeah, it hasn't been completely exploited yet. It will be soon. Thanks to Jake and other people that we're friends with. They're coming down here and they're going to demand, you know, that there's more daycares or whatever the hell, more kiddie gymnasiums.

And you know, an actual Starbucks instead of a safeway starbucks right is there a target there's not a target that's when i'll know it's time to move down to raton i used to want a target but then that that would mean that we were up to like probably 15 000 people and it would start to be a little busier i like mostly that there's a lack of people everywhere like and they don't walk they're not all walking their dogs at the same time you know at 50509 because they work nine to five there's a lot of there's a lot of people that are just kind of you know at home and maybe they'll they'll drive their truck down to we have a Walmart we have a Safeway and so that's where you see a lot of the action but for the most part a walmart we have a safeway and so that's where you see a lot

of the action but for the most part a lot of people are keeping to themselves and so there's not a bunch of people there's no scooters there's no rentable scooters let alone six different companies so that they're just god what an eyesore that i do not miss from denver is just these you know these scooters just thrown into a lawn i hated the scooters until one day I actually got on one with a friend and went around and looked at murals. I was like, oh, well, this is a better use of a scooter than just being a – I don't know. It seems like people are assholes on scooters.

You know, like when people do the pedal bar, you're like assholes. Yes. But I actually rode the scooter. Also, when my car was in the shop and I was about to walk three miles, and instead I got on a scooter, I was like, oh, my God, duh. Right. No. Well, that would be one thing.

But if everyone were using them – well, if everybody that lived in Denver was using them for practical purposes, that's one thing. But they were just – a lot of people were visiting. And so they'd just go flying, you know, the, the wrong way down a street downtown and then just mess up everything. People messed up hitchhiking. Yeah. I, I, I feel like we like, that's something that should have been shared with everybody.

And definitely we should be able to hitchhike, but, but no, people mess that up. Yeah. Uh, yeah. have been shared with everybody indefinitely we should be able to hitchhike but but no people mess that up yeah uh yeah mostly right yeah all of the uh lead all the lead in the in paint and in water might have might have caused that really i haven't i haven't done a deep dive have you read about that becker i think becker's one that told me about it yeah i've read i read like two different things on it but they weren't deep dives either they were more referencing these recent deep dive fucking things but yeah there's like uh there's been a couple serial killers before our like grandparents and parents generation but not a ton and then all of a sudden anybody knows about it used to be really

way easier to get away with it yeah but they're like the pattern like they knew about jack the ripper if you had a pattern of murder unless you were spreading it out over giant swaths of time and people also weren't like mobile in their 40s in the 17 1800s uh but everybody using these lead lined pipes and lead paint on their houses they think it led to a big increase in people having like uh deep psychosis generation and baby boomers and so i don't know because i was talking about that with somebody else and they were like well what about school shootings and i was like yeah that wasn't addressed in there i didn't think about that i think yeah i was gonna say i

think instead of having the chemical like the direct uh brain damage you have the indoctrination or the the propaganda that can radicalize people and and enrage them access to firearms as well and the normalization of it i don't know. Yeah, the celebration of it wasn't as big until more recently. The NRA, you know, just started being big cheerleaders for just huge honking guns. And, you know, guns and trucks, you know, trying to make men feel like men, trying to make women feel powerful. Like, you know, get a gun or two, you know, you're not going to take any lip anymore. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, I think that might be why we have, cause yeah, it would be tough to try and get away with a bunch of murders. You would have to do one, you know, and then drive across the country and then do another one and then drive

somewhere else. Cause if you do two or three, everybody, yeah, no cell phone, change up your look every time you know how often are you going to find you know places where you can get there and then nobody sees you and then you can get out of there you know uh it's increasingly have like a have like a grandparent voucher is that what you're gonna say you're gonna need somebody else to hide your secret for you well not just that i was gonna say the sad truth is as long as you're not killing little white girls the the murder solving rates 14 they solve 14 of murders so they don't catch shit still yeah it's just that we now have like a whole entertainment

industry that tells us like nah there's forensic dudes that get shit done like not really those are very rare cases every like all the channels are covering the same cases that went well for the cops right yeah but yeah 86 last year went unsolved well they found the guy that hit did a hidden run on nikki minaj's dad damn oh yeah that's one i mean also perhaps it's because she's a high profile person with a lot of money so yes you know when did when did when did her dad get killed i think just like last week oh god turns out it was a 70 year old hit and run tampered with evidence looking at his phone probably i like sit and watch people like because my grandma's house is on the corner and i don't know if you guys know this but i got a stop sign put in right yeah you were having to deal with just people constantly driving towards

your grandma's house like up into the lawn yeah well she said that it had never happened but i it just it sounds like it's going to happen every 10 minutes okay so it had happened that time when i saw it like after i moved in like a week after i moved in and then again like two weeks later across the street and then also though it had happened across the street before at the church so people do hop the curb and stuff because there's a bit of a dip there and people race down that street very fast so i like emailed some people and got stop signs stop signs they put one made a three-way stop about five blocks away and then made my corner a four-way stop so i just sit and watch people run the stop signs now everybody's just running the stop signs and i sit there like

a crazy old person just yell that's all i got your license plate it was a lgs something something something you're done they drive so fast down that street though like it's just it made me think your grandma's house was like uh the horn Hornet on Broadway, where just constantly cars were crashing through the facade. Oh, man, I was terrified to even at the Hornet. It got to the point where I was like, I can't sit right here. I can't do it. When there was ice out, it was like, no way. Last time I was at the Hornet, not the last time, but I remember sitting there with a friend and watching this baby.

The baby was at that closest to that wall that keeps getting hit and I was like what's I was like this baby is done for who said baby in a prime spot if anybody gets hit right now that baby's getting hit they got it they had a a sociopath for a

host or a hostess because tell that tell that parent to take that kid in the farthest corner of the of the restaurant the baby was just like that sounds like it was a it was a setup it was a hit put out on that baby i think it was baby hitler somebody was coming to get him finally becker you know so you would have that you would know every time the Hornet got hit and then Skylark got hit too. So Mutiny was like destined, but. No, remember we used to have those big giant concrete planters in front of Mutiny?

Yes. They've been systematically hit and taken away by cars. Wow. Yeah, there's nothing there anymore. Becker just got hit by a car on the second floor. I knocked over some leaves. I've watched some of those in front of my grandma's corner.

I would love to get giant planters in case people... But she has rocks on her front. She took the grass out because it was too much maintenance for her. And so there's rocks and I think that helped because the guy that jumped the curb, the wheels really couldn't... it was like quicksand yeah but you know he also hit a light pole which lucky for me it felt like just perpendicular to the street it hit a car

um hit the back window of a car and there was a couple parked in front of that car so they were lucky but yeah that light could have come over and fallen on the house um the kids he gets out he's just like my car really bro i got a flat tire what that's like 40 bucks god damn it what a piece of shit. He's like, I got a drag race in 15 minutes. I'm screwed. So people really fly down that street, but I'm, I'm obsessed with it and I have to get over it.

I can't, you know, it's a bad, they, everybody knows where I live. It's like that lady standing right there. But I kind of just hope a cop will come and get some ticket, ticket people and just make it like,

you know, a corner that you, you're like, Oh, that's some ticket people and just make it like you know a corner that you you're like oh that's the ticket that's the corner where you get tickets like just everybody uh buckles their seat belt up the block before because like all right we gotta watch out for this one yeah that's better than just flying through there yeah got a care in the world ice cube also mentions not this block, but two blocks away. It's like a famous block. He says, I hit the dip on 108th and then I'm smashing or something like that. It's like right by us.

It's like a dip right there and then two blocks away, another dip at my grandma's house. But people fly down that street. They come from the freeway and they just... Anyway, there's stop signs now. So also there's a lot of glass in the street for people not knowing that there's a stop sign or not caring. And now they're getting in accidents. Probably my fault. It's my fault.

You put some glass out there. You're like, all right, here's a little speed bump for you. I kind of did, too, do that. Somebody's been drinking, like, I don know if I can brandy or something. They keep drinking outside my grandma's house because she has like a wall that's like under a tree. There's also some sex trafficking in my neighborhood. But they keep dumping their like bottles. And so I moved the bottles to inside the parking space.

And I was like, nobody parked there. And then when I got home the next day, there was glass everywhere. I was like, whoops. Guess it worked. And then the next night, somebody cleaned it up, and I felt terrible about it. It was one of my nice neighbors cleaning it up, of course. I was just being a psycho old lady. Did I tell you that I dumped concrete on this lady's lawn, too?

I'm, like, losing my mind in this neighborhood. You're my hero. Yeah, you're turning. Tell us about your vigilante justice. Yeah, I was going to say, you're turning into a crime fighter. You sound like me when I was manic. I wanted to try and kill every...

I wanted to kill every pedophile that I could find. I wanted to go on a mission for, yeah, for justice from the unheard. I wouldn't doubt that there's some mania happening. I would not be surprised. i can't diagnose myself but i the moment when i dumped the concrete later that the next morning i was like what the fuck's wrong like it was so heavy too and i was like like i was on this lady's yard like and then I picked all the trash out by hand because I was like, just the concrete, just the concrete.

And so what did she done? My neighbor had been putting concrete in my grandmother's trash can with her permission. Okay. And then the neighbor's brother would pull the trash cans out. That was a regular thing they had going. And, but then the neighbor, she that was a regular thing they had going and um but then the neighbor she's not a nice lady and so as soon as i moved in i tried to introduce myself and it's that she didn't introduce herself she was just like you need to pick up that dog poop i already told your cousin

to pick up that dog poop and i was just like hi i'm janae she was like hi she went oh hi i was like in your name uh-huh and she was just like the dog is going crazy the dog is why y'all you gotta do something about the dog the dog is deaf and old and my grandmother was not tending to him quite very well but he's not wild he's he's old he's an old man and anyway so they're putting the concrete in there with my grandmother's permission and then and i didn't like it because I was like, is this legal? Is this okay? Are we going to get in trouble for this? And then the lady sent,

my grandma ended up getting a letter from the city saying that her dog was off leash and that she would be fined. And that if she didn't pick up the dog poop and put him back on the leash, he was out of, he's never out of the yard. Nobody's walking him but me. Sorry, white people. But anyway, it was a lie. And so I told her that I was like, you didn't have to do that. Why did you send this letter? My grandmother's not feeling well right now. And I told you that I'm here to help her. So I'll be picking up the dog poop and I'll be taking care of the dog. So you didn't have to do that. She's like, well, they're not really going to show up because

COVID right now, they're not really coming out. And and i was like so why do you even do it i we already talked you don't need to do that and she was like and so then another night when my grandmother ended up in the emergency room and it was just like the hardest day i left her medication at my sister's and like at one in the morning i drove to go back and get the medication it was just like the hardest day ever and then I came and I looked in the trash can just because I was being like there better not be concrete in this trash can because I told the guy okay he the guy was like it's the last week it's the last week I said fine it's the last week and then the next week it wasn't the last week and it was the hardest day and And there was concrete, and I was just like, not today.

And I dumped it on her yard. But I pulled out all the trash because I was just like, just the concrete. Just the concrete. Because you're an anti-hero, but that's not a villain. That is an anti-hero. You're still a hero. But then the next morning, guess what? It was all cleaned

up as if it never happened the concrete was back in the trash can and so i really yeah huh so the guy that pulls the trash cans out he just cleaned it up and put it back yeah oh my little point wasn't taken i was more angry and so the next day I dragged the trash can full of concrete over to her while she was outside. I was like, hi, where shall I leave your concrete? And I was yelling and smiling. I was like, where shall I leave your concrete? And she was just like, what? I was like, where do you want me to put your concrete?

Because it can't go in my grandma's trash can. She was like, I don't know, grandma's trash and she was like i don't know right there and i was like okay dumped it and i dumped it on her yard and i was just like i was like being crazy for real well it sounds like you tried to do what you could and they were they were you know they were pushing you and trying to take advantage. So fuck that. I mean, it partly was because my grandmother is a shit talker. Like, she's a real nice, sweet church lady. But she's also the type of like, yeah, that lady. That lady.

And I'm just like, I'll take care of it, Grandma. But she's also just talking. My sister reminded me of that. It's like, it's just an old lady talking. You don't need to go, you know, get on her behalf she's she told them they could put the concrete in the trash can so just it's not a big deal but but i make it a big deal so i would say that her her freaking out about the dog shit was where it's like okay and then you know you can just both pick your battles and you picked a battle and she apparently it's like, oh, okay. And then, you know, you can just both pick your battles and

you picked a battle and she apparently, it's funny when they cool off, you know, and I think it's usually when you show them that you could be, you could be crazy as hell if they want you to be. I was like, don't push me. I know I was smiling and shaking hands, but sometimes, sometimes I don't make great decisions. I am doing my best to keep it together. So there was just a lot going on, you know, plus I'm broke, lost all my jobs. It was just like, fuck everybody right now. So. How many driveways are they pouring over there?

You know, there's just the one. Yeah. What the fuck are y'all doing back there? Like the guy was like, oh, this wall fell down in the the back y'all building an addition because the neighborhood people keep building fucking illegal additions and so i started to look into like how can what do i do to tell on my neighbor for her illegal addition i was just like i know my grandma my grandmother doesn't want to be involved in any drama she doesn't she's not a shit starter but i kind of am so i have to like back off though she's been neighbors with this lady for 30 years you know they talk shit about each other for 30 years it's

not up to me to come and dump concrete like game no the game has changed now they they had they had a little game and the neighbor might have been winning and the grandma was just you know keeping her shit talking inside. And you're like, Nope, this is an outside game. I'm going to go over there. Like when I told my cousin and my aunt, like, yeah, I tried to introduce myself to the neighbor. And she was just like, Hey, you got to pick up your dog shit.

And I told Trayvon to come over here. You got to tell Trayvon, like she was telling me to tell my cousin. And I was just like, you don't have to tell me how to get the dog shit. The fact that you want it up. I can handle that. That's cool. And she was just like, you don't have to tell me how to get the dog shit. The fact that you want it up. I can handle that. That's cool. And she was just like, yeah,

well, she just kept being like, and then my cousin kept being like, why would I say it? And I would have said, and then I went and said it. And then people were like, today,

you're starting to get with the neighbor. I was like, I thought we were gonna say something okay so yeah yeah your family was maybe you know taking things a little slow and you're like we don't have time it is shit is ending soon it's like i have nobody to yell at right now i will you know at that point i probably was like i don't know i don't want to claim manic but i was on the internet also yelling at people with just like i was on the rampage of like i'm unhappy right now and i need to act out and throw shit and nothing is in my control right now and i just that's all the control i had leaving bad yelp reviews and just feel like listen to me well and so the dog wasn't even the dog wasn't in the

neighbor's yard right the dog was no she was saying that she could smell it from her window my grandmother has a wall and the lady the lady built an illegal two-story that's what i want to say maybe you can fucking smell it if you didn't build an illegal two-story hovering over the house looking at everything so but it was like okay i'll pick up the dog poop i'll pick it up because my grandmother also kept saying the gardener will pick it up dogs in la are not like dogs in denver okay i'll take that back dogs and black families are not like dogs in denver all right my whole family is like it's it's a. It's a dog. It stays outside. It's a blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, no, you walk behind it and pick up its poop.

You don't wait until Sunday afternoons to pick up its poop all at once. You pick it up as you go. You kiss it in the mouth. You let it get its own therapist. Like, I live in Denver. This is how you do. Yeah, you let it get its tarot cards. What?

Yeah, the dog eats at the table i said that you you get the tarot cards pulled for your dog cards for the dog you know to see what he wants at for lunch come on people are bad here in trinidad i mean people were pretty bad in denver there was a good amount of dog shit uh around you know in denver where megan and i were living and it's bad down here like i had a guy uh he was standing outside of a of a garage i think he worked at this uh mechanics garage and i was walking by with mama and george michael and one of them pooped and i had bags and i picked up the poop and this dude said oh oh man, you are one responsible dog owner. And I was like, that's going to be my

that's going to be how people know me. Have you seen this fella that picks up his dog's shit? Like immediately? I mean, I'm not even talking under duress. I'm talking of his own volition. He's got my vote. Yeah, that's the run for office right now. I i'm gonna try to do a video

of me uh being uh trying to do good here and one of the things i think would be funny is just picking up random dog shit because i i do not have a good stomach for just random dog shit like i had to get good at my dog's shit and realize like it's not like they ate some random thing that's gonna you know attach to your hand i don't even know why i can't just do it but it would be disgusting man yeah it would involve and and people down here a lot of times don't have little dogs so there's just horse road apples everywhere people so it would be it would it would be a lot of dry heaving and maybe even some wet heaving uh which would make for a video it would make for a funny

you're gonna actually pick up poop it's not stage you're gonna go around town and actually pick up right yeah i think it would be funny because i would actually be doing something good but at my own expense because i would definitely and then you talk about but at my own expense, because I would definitely. And then you talk about the scat that you find and how some of it is human. Probably some of it is cat. Cat's cat. You should also scat. There is some cat.

You should pick it up with that. Picking up dog shit, throwing up in my mouth. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it sucks is there, there are a lot of outdoor cats out here and my dogs will

eat. They don't eat dog shit. They used to eat goo shit at city park. And so we didn't go to city park. And then when they killed all those geese, it was like, Oh, we can go to city park again because there wasn't just this shit everywhere that my dogs wanted to eat, but they will eat cat shit. So we have to be on the lookout out here instead of chicken wings on the ground. There's a lot of cat shit and my dogs want, they want all the chicken wing bones and all the cat shit that they can find.

That's their mission. So we've had to be vigilant out here. But yeah, I think I, and I've, I have been picking up other dog, other dogs bags of shit because sometimes people will bag it and then just leave it. Who are these terrible people?

I'm like, I can't, like, fix the world. But there are some bad people. I know we always jump to, like, I think I was talking to some friends about the idea of, like, evil and when you have to take responsibility for being evil. What if your childhood was bad? I was like, well, what about these? There's the people who leave the dog shit. are richard ramirez somehow i think there is like that is closer than we think it's like a lot it's in their psychology there's something connected yeah like who how could you bag it like i could imagine bagging it like i walked the blocks with the shit

yeah i just walked the blocks and carry the shit until i get to a trash can right that and that used to be the the norm and i think it's just people don't want to show any weakness they want to look tough they want to look cool they want to smell tough carrying some other being shit that's for sure you look well i think yeah because you look like you care about strangers and that somehow can be seen as like this weak because you don't have to because and even though you kind of have to like legally you know you could get in trouble like your your grandma could maybe eventually have it you know result in whatever a citation or something. But because it's not, there's typically people can get away with a lot of bad behavior. And if

they can, then they just, they do, you know, there's not like that inherent, oh, I'm doing this because I should. There's more like, I get away with as much as I can because that makes me smart. That makes me. That's such a goody two-sho shoes though. Like I'm like all goody two shoes hall monitor. Pick that up. Stop at that stop sign. Well, stop at that stop sign. Isn't that crazy when,

you know, a kid gets killed. Yeah. I was thinking about putting a memorial, uh, as a stop sign just to make it look like it's, that's why we got it. Somebody died.

I love your civic involvement. Yeah. A couple of teddy bears, a couple of candles. Yeah, dude. A little kid sized Dodgers cap. That would be pretty good.

Yeah. I think I should do it yeah i mean if people are running the light and are running the stop sign and it's been there for however you know six seven eight months now yeah i think now it's just been a couple weeks actually it only got a stop sign yeah just a couple weeks i mean i started emailing about it months ago i'm shocked that it actually showed up i didn't think it was coming i just all i did was email and i didn't even yell about it months ago. I'm shocked that it actually showed up. I didn't think it was coming. I just... All I did was email, and I didn't even yell about it. I emailed, I sent a couple photos.

Somebody moved it up the chain of command, and there it went. But now I gotta set up the memorial. Like, we miss you, Pablo. Like... We should get people to slow down a little bit

yeah well yeah and then they're not even stopping completely at the stop sign they're just rolling through at like 12 miles an hour instead of 40 so it's like a small victory and you could count it as a win if you just have

the ability to be scared every time you go outside that somebody's just going to run your ass over. I'm scared inside, sitting in the house. It's like the guest room that I'm in is on the street side, so it's like every 20 minutes I have a little mini heart attack, just like, this is it. Okay, we're fine.

Over and over again, all night long. Oh, my God. just little heart attacks becker's been having a lot of mini strokes but you're having many hearts oh no oh god i'm sorry i only have one we're just having fun okay yeah related probably it was pretty much made andy have a stroke with the dab you gave him. I'll never forgive you for that, Becker. It wasn't dab related. He fucking gave Andy a dab at High Plains and ruined my High Plains. I blame you for that shit.

The whole weekend. When a grown-ass man asks me for drugs, I assume he can handle them. I missed most of High Plains because I was in a little movie at the time. And then I think that was the same year I got to do the headlining show. And so I was finally there at the parties. I did the headlining show. I was feeling great. Showed up on

Broadway to hit the parties. Went to the fucking sexy pizza crash pad. And this dude gives Andy a fucking dab. Andy doesn't barely smoke weed he was drunk as a skunk already took his knees out we barely made it down the stairs

got to Three Kings Andy was collapsing I had to get a taxi like somebody and then the taxi was like you're getting in too right getting in too and then I was like Becker can kiss my ass oh man I'm glad we got that uh at the end me too you're not alone

yeah you gotta yeah people I used to smoke weed pretty much every day, but if I still would try to do a dab or two, it's a whole other level. You're just blasted off into. It's not, it's for professionals. And Andy was like, I don't know, I guess.

And Becca was like, I don't like getting people too high. I think people assume I do like getting people too high. I think people assume I do like getting people too high. I don't. I just like getting people high. He gets off on it. He shut off his brain from the spine. He just ragdolled down those stairs.

Yeah. And I was like, oh, me. I was like, but I look really cute. Is it possible I can just shove him in a cab? Nope. But you got in there? Yeah, end of high planes for me. You had to go home and tell Ryan to put his hood away?

Get your fucking Aryan friends out of here, Ryan. Andy's fucked up. Do the balance and your fucking tiki torches and take them in your own room. do the balance and your fucking tiki torches and take them in your own room. Well, I guess that's it for this episode. We are past our, our hour mark. Is there anything that you want to plug? Do you want to,

you got any shows or you got to, when is this coming out? I'm doing a show on Friday. I have a show on the 21st. I want to say, check my website, but i haven't really been on top of oh i just got cast in a play i don't even know if i could tell people yet i've been in denver for like two months oh yes denver play this will come out tomorrow oh shit this will come out tomorrow i gotta talk to my family about some stuff real quick so i don't think they're gonna do they don't listen my family won't listen they're not chubby chasers yet but maybe this will get them oh they are they are but um i'm gonna be in a play at the aurora fox theater and it runs in may so oh no it runs it runs april in the beginning of

may it's only it's like short run like rehearsal it's really short and then the run is only a couple weeks but it's a one-person show and i mean i just got the info yes they just told me i got the part yesterday and i was like oh it's a one-person show yeah i better start memorizing today i'm gonna have to get up this will be my last weed smoke today yeah Yeah, no more devs for you. I know from experience that weed and memorizing your lines, it don't work. So I'm going to have to get off weed. Yeah, all of a sudden you just start reciting a Law & Order SVU that you like a lot.

Halfway through, you're like, oh, shit not this is not medea i have been watching a lot of medea at grandma's house by the way though tyler perry on non-stop tyler perry owns bet non-stop tyler perry i realized as i said medea it sounded racist in a way as if i'm talking about tyler perry i talking about racist. I'm a theater gal. Oh, thank God. Okay. Well, I just meant when I'd not that you thought that, but that people would think I was thinking of Tyler Perry when I was not, I got to see Timmy lastly as Medea and it was incredible. I couldn't imagine memorizing. I mean, it's not a one woman play. There were other parts,

but she was the bulk, you know, just so many lines. It was crazy. Well, come and see me in this show though. There will be so many lines. I'll have to.

All of them. Hopefully. I'll come up there. Uh, I got to plug our Patreon because this is not a Patreon episode, but, uh, we have a bunch of great episodes on our Patreon. Patreon.com

slash Chubby Behemoth. I just talked to Jordan Dahl on Tuesday and that came out yesterday, I think. There's maybe a dozen, 15, 20 episodes? 19 or 20. Okay, so yeah, a bunch of content on the Patreon

that you can access for as little as $5 a month. We also have a couple other tiers. You can do $10 a month. You can be a part of our monthly AMA. And then I think we have a $20 tier. You can get something in the mail. Sam will mail you a manifesto or a listing of grievances. Some hair.

Yeah, we've sent out some hair. We've sent out some merch. Pretty much stuff that you just kind of chuckle at and then hopefully throw away. Hopefully people aren't keeping the hair or pressing it in between a book like some leaves in the fall. Actually, I wouldn't mind if anybody that's creative enough was able to use our hair to make a doll of some kind. That would be kind of fun.

No, you don't want that. That's a voodoo doll. You want somebody to use your hair? You're giving somebody authority to make a voodoo doll. Yeah, well, I guess I do have to specify. This doll would need to be used for just good just on a shelf i wouldn't want it to be uh you know used for any type of weird or evil purposes whether it's to harm us or to sap our strength so that you can you know rob a bank

we don't need any of that. Negative associations. Only positive thoughts with your hair doll, please. And I don't want it to be sexual either. I don't want you to fuck the hair doll or make the hair doll fuck you. You know what? When you send somebody your hair, I don't even know if you can specify whether they can have sex with it or not.

That's not up to you anymore. That's their hair. That's true. Yeah, that's true. Once we put it in an envelope, it is not to you anymore. That's their hair. That's true. Yeah, that's true. Once we put it in an envelope, it is not our hair anymore. It's the recipient's hair. So that is a good point. I also have been meaning to give a shout out to Jay Gillespie.

He's been doing Cougar Nights five nights a week since he moved down to Trinidad. He's almost up to 100 episodes. And those are available on YouTube. They're available on Facebook. He streams on Twitch and he's going to take a break after the 100th episode, but I'm sure he'll be back doing Cougar Nights sooner than later. And it's a fun, great way to watch a guy just, you know, create just in a room by himself, uh, creating and trying to make people laugh. I'm meaning to shout him out cause he's down here in Trinidad and,

I enjoy it. He, he starts to hit like this kind of rhythm that you can get into, you know? And, uh, so I think, uh,

yeah, worth checking out. But yeah, thanks for listening. Thanks for joining us. Janae, I appreciate talking to you. I miss you very much. I miss you too. Save some room for me in Trinidad.

Sounds like everybody's there. Save some room for me. Well, one of the positives is that not everybody is here, but there's a few great people down here. Enough great people that it's worth a trip, and we'd be happy to have you. Once I start booking shows down here, you'll be one of the first people that I talk to about trying to come down. I want to do an episode of my podcast, too.

I need to do test episodes or whatever. I don't know if I'm going to release them all, but I need to. Yeah, get me in there. I know. I'm sorry. My dad's not even, my dad's not even in the ground yet, which means let's get that content out there while it's fresh. I know. Let's get the pain. I haven't had anybody with fresh, juicy pain. Let me, let me feed on that.

For sure. Yeah. Get me, let's wring me dry.