Chubby Behemoth - It's Not Real Gold

Episode Date: October 2, 2026

Order Sam's New Book - https://www.amazon.com/dp/0593978897/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3I4LOBQ02YIGW&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.k5eCApJdjwVfn7hSelWi5VdRMlVrzKa4zf68ficcjcg.tZZOiI0nB0n3kkWiGAbidMQy5yUS_MkvmEIaXp-LXjo&dib_tag=se&keywords=sam+tallent+brut&qid=1769522903&sprefix=sam+tallent+,aps,181&sr=8-1&dplnkId=90401c83-a6a0-4ad4-999e-ece570a5d320&nodl=1     SEE THE BOYS LIVE - https://www.samtallent.com/     Sponsor: IndaCloud - If you're 21 or older, get 30% OFF your first order @ IndaCloud with code CHUBBY at https://inda.shop/CHUBBY #indacloudpod     PATREON EPISODES: https://www.Patreon.com/chubbybehemoth     This week the boys are all together in Indianapolis. Sam is trapped in a fart cocoon, tried to score a new cardboard cutout, and beat Heathcliff to the move. Nathan thought huel lasted forever, told the boys about an awesome shirt/hat combo he spotted at the show, and got a new dog.      00:00 Hang Gliding 02:12 I Was Fascinated 04:35 Go To Prison Forever 06:52 Smell It With My Eyes Closed 09:19 Self Immolate 11:28 Whipped Cream 13:16 We Can See It 16:59 Greatest Hits 18:41 Went And Did It 21:32 We Had To Sign A Contract 25:09 Tighten Up 27:50 I Wasn't Going To Say 29:48 Break The News On The Pod 31:32 Wish I Was There 34:27 So This Is A Bit 36:04 Grab Yourself A Cold Drink 38:50 Gilmore Car Museum 42:21 Knock At Your Door 45:13 Made It Official 47:52 Woulda Had Four Or Five 48:25 Bones And All 51:03 Bursting At The Seams 52:54 Gives Me One Of These 54:21 Wouldn't Be Allowed Into The Airport 58:02 Couldn't Be In More Pain 58:43 You're Whole Thing 01:00:26 I Mean No 01:03:16 Happy Button     Nathan Lund and Sam Tallent are Chubby Behemoth

Hello, viewer. Welcome. And hopefully listener. Hopefully there's still more listeners than viewers. Driving a forklift. Yeah. Whatever you're doing out there, if you're hang gliding, if you're slunking a cave, maybe you're ignoring responsibilities in your house. Whatever you're up to, thank you for joining us here on Chubby Behemoth.

And we have really splurged here. This set... Yeah. It's nuts. He's all been begging for it. We want to thank Howie Mandel for creating us this hologram set that travels with us. And, well, it might look like we're in an Airbnb in suburban Indianapolis. No, we're actually being projected through the hyperspace.

That's how I understand it. I don't get it. I don't either. But, you know, here we are, you know, in all of the dimensions, including the fourth one. I'm wearing a mocap suit. Believe it or not, this is... Patrick's an all green. That's why you can't see him.

I can move his lips with my hand. Watch. You better not be. Yeah, I don't want to. Bad for the algorithm. You can have four white guys? I don't think so. Three is good.

Three's company. Yeah. And we are a company of men who pride ourselves on not letting each other down. It's kind of our whole thing. You know, I got you, man. I lift you back up, you know. Hey, don't worry, pal. you always have a friend in me

and I failed you guys this evening I let you guys down because I showed that I'm capable of anger and were you angry I couldn't tell when you snarled and

clawed my face that's the thing is I didn't do either of those things I became Betsy talent because I ran away because I told you go to the house and then you went, oh, and I went,

go to the house. And then you guys walked away. You picked up a big rock. Yeah, yeah. Pat and I held hands. I did pick up the rock and I chewed it down

to a butt of pebble. My teeth are sharp now. But yeah, shouldn't have shown, I assume that's the angriest Pat's ever seen me. You see me angrier when you exposed yourself

at my mom's funeral? And you said, check this out, Betsy. When he found those noodles. this will bring you back I wasn't mad I was fascinated it was a novel experience

I was grateful ultimately that there was a noodle downstairs yeah and it filled the hour as we say in the podcast game in New Orleans yes yes

no I wasn't I wasn't that mad about the noodle thing it was more like hey Pat so Emily says that you flushed a bunch of noodles I don't know what to do

I'm running it by yet. I want to bring you in on this, Pat. Yeah, but no. I don't know. In this day, I denied ever doing that with the noodles. Yeah, that's what a noodle flusher would say. They flushed themselves. Yeah.

Well, then there was the other fucking bad news. I was mad about that, too. They burnt the chicken man down last. Oh, no. Oh, man. Yeah. I was too excited. I couldn't get it out.

It counts. It counts for sure. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It went off the upright. Still good. They blew up, is what I like to say. I don't know.

Have you seen me angry like that? Did the angriest? Yeah, I mean, you're pretty unflappable, and you had your freak out after New Zealand when we were on. You guys weren't there. You weren't part of that. And you weren't mad. Do it my own. I was mental.

Right. Yeah. You lost that. That was Pocococco. So, yeah. By the way, Susanna did this to describe her grandmother. Her great grandmother the other day, she went. Uh-oh.

In front of her? No, on the way over in the car. Oh, before. Yeah, so I was like, oh, you know, I was Marion. We're talking about Marion, you know. And Susanna went. Yeah, Emily goes, she has some M-E-M-E-R-O-Y. Yeah, yeah.

She's dealing with M-E-M-M-O-Y problems. Yeah, it. Yeah. Dizzy bitch. Sisu. But, yeah, no, I try not to be angry. But I did get angry and I apologize, Becker. It's fine.

I didn't yell at anyone. I fucked up Royal. You could have yelled. I wouldn't have held it against you. He only accomplishes nothing. But I immediately became my mother and was, there are no mistakes. You know, there's no accidents, you know, that kind of thing. Yeah, so I didn't say any of this, but I thought at all.

And I just retreated down the alleyway to not be near you. I was about to kill you when you decided that you were going to Nash Bridges, the brand new rental car and figure out a way to jimmy it into neutral. I got it into neutral, but it wouldn't let me move still because it had an electric. That was only if the battery was dead. And if I was going to go to prison forever for the actions that I wanted to perpetrate, it might have been when I was pushing on the back of the fucking van while you're in shock. I figured out how to put it in neutral

and you're in there and I'm pushing and blow my back out and then I realize the fucking brake lights are on. Yeah. So I mean come on man. Sledding up hill. Come on man. What the fuck? That was truly the craziest

I felt in a long time. It would throw the electric parking brake like as soon as we started to jiggle it at all. I was worried that the van was stopped in an alleyway less than a block away from the house. I was worried that people on either side of us in the suburban neighborhood with a werewolf

was savaging someone outside. So I kept my distance. I gave you $20, which, what did you do with that? Gave it to the driver. By gum? Yeah, okay. Do you smell like gas? Oh, yeah.

Did you get gas all over the guy's car? No. I can't win them all. That would have brought me joy. No, I thought I got bad. If you were gassed up. Gas can, where's the gas can now? I had Pat throw all three.

of them that I bought away. You bought three gas cans? Yeah, I've broken down in many cars. One gallon won't start a fuel injection. No, I know. I was waiting. I was waiting for you to say, I have to go back.

No. I would have said, carry on, Becker. It's your whole thing. Yeah, no, I know better than that. So I got three, because if they don't have any bigger containers, that would be fucking insane.

Sure, you have to get the gallon jugs. Yeah. It's not that it was a failure of everyone involved. I know you guys will never see it this way. But we all could have said no get gas. But you said when we left Helium Comedy Club, seven minutes away, that we have enough to get home.

Yeah. And when your whole thing is I love cars, I can name every car by sound. If you give me the manual of a car, I can smell it with my eyes closed and know what make and model it is. Yeah. And when you don't give enough juice to your baby

and it dies, it makes me wonder what kind of parent you are. You know, yep. I was surprised because we've all danced that dance and I've never gotten fucked. Because there's like the extra gallon. Yeah, we should have had like eight miles more than we needed. There's no should us. There's no wood us.

You also tempted fake because when the low fuel light came on, you flipped off the dash. And I was like, oh. Yeah, on the way there. Spicy. Yeah. And you were coming off a hot streak of, you know, stopping at that green light. on the highway. That's a tough one.

You can't get so stoned that you can't drive or operate the vehicle. That was a stomach ache and being tired as fuck. Yeah, I mean... I took one dab at the end of the show. I'm just saying. Yeah.

Maybe historically. One would assume that maybe it was the the veil of cannabis that you shroud your mind in. Sure. I think it was the three and a half hours of sleep in an urgent shit. You should sleep more.

Yeah. Lond, your thoughts? Pat and I can't get in trouble for this one. I think it was the two of you equally to blame. It was all me. No, no.

There was four people in that car. No, it was me. I am the leader. I have to fall on this sword. The sword is mine. That was my gig. That's how delegating and being the boss works. It was my fuck up.

It was my fault. It's your job. And the crew. Is the car guy you get his to and from? Yes. It's nobody but me. I get to sit in the captain's chairs in the middle of the van and go like this. Pretend my grandpa is still alive.

What are you holding? Sack lunch? No, I'm sitting. The armrest. With the armrest, you know. Hey, are we going to the pool or coming from the pool? Danny Muppin. You were so full of chocolate.

Are we going swimming or are we coming from swimming? He's all wet. He doesn't realize. Why am I wet? Well, would this help you if Becker were to go outside, light a cigarette and there's gas on the sand? Well, that was a concern. So he goes up.

I was really worried. It won't do. Honestly, bro, when Pat came in and Becker was outside, I was like, okay, he's smoking. And then I had the idea of Becker emolliating and walking to the door and, like, dying like a Vietnam protester. And, like, you know, the last thing I did was give him $20 and shove him into an Uber. Bang his head. I mean, I wanted to give him. It was like cops in Tampa in 95, you know.

I wanted to bang his head off. But I would never would. because people make mistakes for all human beings. It's totally normal to blow it. It's also normal to be pissed when people blow it. It's a wasted emotion. It's a weakness within yourself. And now I'm being trapped by farts, I think.

So really it's kind of like it's, I don't know. It's a test of my metal as a stoic and as a calm person. Keep farting. You keep it up. Everyone's neck and neck I might have to excuse myself at some point I really was on the verge of like shitting when we got in the alley

take off go dump whenever you want we're on Becker time and meanwhile when the van runs out of gas what do my my guys do what are the bros do what's their presence of mine

we're gonna go get in the hot tub you guys got in the hot tub no I kept my I kept my pants and my shoes on in case I was needed. But I also didn't think about anybody staying with the van. I thought we would all...

That's why I was so concerned about getting it neutral, too, is that we were blocking something that, like, maps tell you as a thoroughfare. It really goes to four people's alleys. Right. I did not want somebody to pull in and be like, dumbass. What are you guys doing?

Making out? I don't want to get bras. This isn't guy fuck point. moving up the hill. You want to see a funny meme? Yeah. That's a gif, actually. Red Foreman putting whipped cream all over his head.

Dumbass. Oh, when he got stoned? Hell yeah. Stone in the basement. Yeah. A very close friend of the pod used cannabis for the first time in a long time. And I had to send them funny gifts. Because they were freaking out. Not at all.

I was like, hey, you want to see some funny shit? You're never stoned? Check this out. Red Foreman whipped cream. They're just like... You don't want to say who? No, no, no. It's no one's business.

Judge? A jury and executioner. Federal judge. Yeah, yeah. It's Nick Bockwinkle. All right. How about that? Sure.

Yeah, now I'm talking your language. But yeah, fucking goofus and moofus over there. Through your bindles over and moved on down to the next train. You farted and then skipped away. Yeah, you farted. You trapped me in a fart cocoon. And Pat didn't curvy it in and turn it into power. He didn't suck it in.

Yeah. He didn't turn it into Hewle. It's farts. Hey, why didn't Hewle make it? It was farts. Kind of smud like farts. Bummer. Yeah, I let a bunch of Hewle go bad.

I thought it lasted forever, but it doesn't. That was my apocalypse. You thought it was bunker food. Yeah. Nope. I just watched it go bad. Did you eat it? after or during?

I looked it up and people were like, yeah, it's not like it turns into poison, but yeah, I bought too much fuel. They really got me. Hey, I remember 2019. It was a crazy time.

Everyone was huling up. I was going to pay my whole thing. But yeah, Lund and Pat just were like, we're going to go back to the house. And I was like, we can see it. Yeah, it's right there. And if Pat, I mean, dude,

you guys were like, oh, oh, yeah, maybe we should be aware of how we could help. No, instead, you guys were like, oh, what? And I said, go to the house. Go to the house, Samuel. I'm my mom. Yeah. I was yelling at myself when I was eight years old. Go to the house.

Well, I didn't want to. Yeah, wait with the van. Who does? Well, there was nothing I could do except for stand there with you commiserate, but I didn't know if that was helped. or if you would rather be alone. I wanted you to stay there and me to go back to the house and watch football. That was what I would prefer.

I'll bet. I look back. But, of course, it was on me to, you know, go down with the ship. I'm the captain now. But Pat, when you finally came down that alley, I clocked you. If you were wet at all, my God. If you were in the least damp, I would have fucking flipped out. If you guys went tubbing while I was sitting in the van, not watching football, just pissed,

furious fuming. I mean, that 10 minutes alone was a dark, dark 10 minutes. Yeah, I didn't know. Thinking about it every time everyone's ever blown it, you know, some blowings it that they cover up with my wife when I'm in Australia, you know, these kind of things. So it's like you guys rarely blow it, but when you do, sometimes it's big. Big time. Big time.

Big time. Emmy told me it blew it with the flights. You guys did the right thing. Oh, I do remember when we went with the flights. I didn't know what you're talking about. Tell me your side. And Emmy, if I'm telling stories out of school, I'm sorry, but I want to talk to Becker about this. We blew it with the flights, but I swear to God, we didn't and that they were different.

Well, whatever happened, you guys made the decision not to tell me that you were going to spend an additional $3,000. But I forgot about that. That wasn't your idea. You just reminded me. Right. That was an MT move. Yeah. And hey, respect. My idea was to go get killed.

Well, my thing was, if you guys would have told me, hey, we're doing this big Australia, New Zealand trip, I fucked up. Or if you were, if you would have shooed responsibility at all, no. I said I bought it and it was wrong and it's not my fault. No, the decision was like, I'm just going to have to tell him. I beefed it. And she was like, no, we just fix this and I tell him later. You don't tell him. She never did.

She finally did like very recently. She probably remembered very recently. No, no. I think she was like, no, no. Like we keep, I keep like, I keep you safe. Something along those lines. And I was like, well, I know, but what do you mean? And she was like, well, you know, I bring problems to you when you need them.

And you didn't need it while you were already stressed about selling tickets in Australia, getting to Australia, doing wide world with everyone, getting everyone there. Yeah. Like I didn't need to then be told. Oh, yeah. Because it wasn't like I was going to say, don't buy. the tickets. No, but it was at least, yeah.

I would have just been mad the whole time. Yeah. And then instead, I kind of laughed it off like two years later. Like, ah, that's, you know, good call. Yeah, it sucked. We were panicking. You were panicking. Becker bought tickets for a boat.

We were trying to figure it out, though. It was a panic scheduling. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you bought boat tickets. To Panama, Florida. Not even Panama. Panama.

But yeah. So anyway. It's okay. But that 10 minutes I was sitting in the van, boy, was I just going through a greatest hits of butt fuckery. And guess what? Everyone got a couple of strokes in, all right? Everyone had some pumps.

Everyone blew out my back. They're unique ways. But I also, during that I came out of it and I thought about, oh, that's not that many times blowing it. No. These guys are a good squad. They're a tight squad. crew. I kind of wanted to savor my anger towards you a little bit longer because it is a righteous

feeling. Yeah, it was insane that you're already over it because I'm still pretty mad. It's so pure. It feels so good. To be righteously angry at someone, to be like, yes, they fucked up and I can like legally be allowed to go. Throughout the night. I can go through the night mad at him and like, that would be fine and justified. And it would feel so good to make you feel bad. But no, that's the worst thing you can do. It's to be in control of your anger and then still choose to take it out on someone. That's like, that's ugly. So yeah, I felt it was cool.

I was a fucking, I was, I was an exploding star for 10 minutes. Just like fuming, smoldering, becoming more and more like dense in my anger and then radiating out. Dr. Manhattan. Yeah, exactly. I was nude. Blue, nude. Yeah, man. Glowing.

Uh-huh. Sitting on the moon. watching the earth. What are you chewing on? What are you got in there? Spit it out. No. Go top lip.

I can't handle it. It's in the top. It's like a horse person. Hey, everyone. Great news. Y'all went and did it. And Brute was a USA Today immediate bestseller on the national level. So it's a national bestseller.

We won't have the New York Times list until October 7th. but hey thank you great work I appreciate you buying the book and telling me how you feel about the book and you know resonating so hard with the book also the audio book turned out great I listened to some of it the other day and yeah I thought people were lying and protecting me thank you um if you want to translate all the good vibes you've been giving me and DMs and emails and the people who've been text messaging me, maybe chill with that. But, you know, five stars on Goodreads or Amazon goes a long way. Thank you all. And also, I got a big news, October 8th, Nathan Lund.

Yeah, man, it's a week from right now. Right now. Fort Collins, filming my second special directed by Patrick.p.p.is. Yeah, I'm excited. Hopefully a bunch of people show up and come and laugh. And it's a good time. I've got an Airbnb for the night before and night of. Oh, we have to figure out this Airbnb.

Did you tell them about the new angle that Pat's pitching? New angle. Yeah. Oh, no. You want to tell them here? You guys, well, yeah, I mean, I got to, if anybody in Fort Collins has access to a surfboard, I may try to hold a surf board during the special. Old landlocked Fort Collins, but there's a lot of surfers.

We call it surfs up. You have like a poochie type outfit on. Radical, yeah. Maybe a dog mask. Backwards hat. No jokes about surfing. Never acknowledge the board. There's sand on the stage and you are shoeless.

I'm warming up to the idea. It's not a bad idea. Anyway. Soaps on Surf's Up. Oh, surf and slurp. But, yeah, October 8th, it would be great if anybody that listens and likes me came. In Supon, there's like 30 people there. Most of them didn't know who I was.

I just had Raup Gleason in the middle of the room, nodding. Processing. He had Terminator vision, but just calculating how good a joke is and nodding in approval. And it was act out, detected. He was a port in the storm because it just felt like a void of like who are these people. and then Rob. And I had Eurist and Byron and Noe and Noel were in the back. And so it was great to hang out before, but like during the set, it was nice to have Rob there.

So I would love to have some familiar faces for the second special. We don't want to have to do a college radio giveaway day of. I don't want to do cardboard cutouts. I want Michael Jordan to be there, but not if he's two-dimensional. We almost got a Mr. Beast cut out and bloomed tonight at the bookstore. You almost stole it? Uh-uh. I went up to the lady and I was like, can I I think, what do you get, I'll give you $100 for that, that Mr. Beast.

And she was like, we had to sign a contract that said we wouldn't deface it, post any photos doing anything unglomerous with it. No peeing on it. And we would return it the day of the end of the contract. Wow. They sent us a giant envelope to send it back in. And I was like, oh, because I wanted to like, you know, and they were like, yes, have sex with it. Give it a pile driver. Yeah. Give it DDTs.

Yeah, belly to belly. What have you. Sure. Yeah, we get it. Yeah. Damn. So, yeah. Get tickets to Lund's special taping October 8th right there in Fort Collins.

And come see me. When's this come out, Becker? Tomorrow. St. Louis, Saturday and Sunday at helium. Ask my tattooist. Yeah, yeah, I'm so St. Louis. Just ask my tattooey. I need to let you guys all know.

I'll be at some other places coming up, too. And you'd think I would know them, but I don't. Oh, Bentonville, Arkansas. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, the Bentonville Festival. That'll be awesome. Big Diamond. I'm waiting to get you.

Yeah, yeah. Well, we're trying to get you. I don't know if I got it. Because you were Elena. And one of you is going places. So, yeah, we're going to get London. Get tickets to see my big headlining show. That'd be cool.

There's like 40 tickets sold. Lucas McCrary added a show. I think everyone just takes, you know, the old fucking truck for granted. The suburban will start, you know? We're going to wait in line to see the sports car. But hey, we're going to fucking fire up the truck. go make out in the back seat.

So yeah, make sure you don't embarrass me at my own festival. Kansas City, Missouri, Levittown, governor's bell house in New York, get those tickets. I don't know if they're folding me into the New York Comedy Festival. I told my people specifically I wanted nothing to do with it, but I happen to be there like during the New York Comedy Festival. And I'm pretty sure I'm going to get an email day of with a different graphic saying, hey, congrats, because you know how people are in this business,

this crazy thing called show. Manchester, Connecticut. That's right. Why not? The Funny Bone. Yeah, earn it, Sam. Do the fucking Manchette, the Hartford, Connecticut, Funny Bone in November. Yeah.

It's good people up there. They're great people, but it's going to be Northeaster. Yeah, it's just a tough time to be in Connecticut. Skangfest, of course. Comedy Works. Downtown. I'll be there. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

Royal Oak, wrapping up the season. And maybe Orange Peel and Asheville. if we decide to make that happen. Come see me now, because who knows? What next year looks like? Love you. Get the Patreon.

It's a great Patreon. Get it. Go over there. Five bucks. Five smackers. $1.25 a week. Oh, my God. Becker needs the money

because he's paying for gas. He's got all his gas cans. Anyway, enough of my battles with anger. But yeah, good work, everyone. You guys are a good squad. Could have been a lot worse. We could have been on a street.

Mm-hmm. Middle of the day. People honking. Dumbass. Cars need gas. Dumbass. People whip-creaming their heads. They're so mad.

Should we just do an airing of grievances? My solution. What else you got? What are you got for me? Nothing. You're the man. Well, no, but I mean, what can we do better as a team? You're a cool boss.

I know. but like what do we need to what do we need to tighten up we're better you're better because I feel like there were times in years past where you were more know what I want or like I don't want to be bothered asking being asked a bunch of questions because I'm doing so much other stuff and it's like yeah but we want your input and you want to have the input yeah it was the king of uh I don't care what we eat and then you'd say all right we're going to the deli yeah and say I want to Vietnamese food. I want Bumbo way.

Which was never, it was never a big deal. No, I know, but that is an annoying trait to be like, oh, I don't care.

It's just like, you know, girlfriend type stuff. You don't want that. But that was years ago, I feel, at this point. Yeah,

so that's not, that's not like a current thing at all. And you've been like apologizing too much for taking calls. It's like, bro, you got to take calls,

make calls. When I say girlfriend, I mean, immature. relationship. It's not wife behavior. Yeah. Yeah, no, I have to take calls. I know that you guys aren't mad, but it is embarrassing.

Because I have to, I present as a version of myself. We all have our masks that we wear in the different relationships with you guys. I'm often the purest form. Like, I'm just myself. But then when I'm doing the dance for certain people, it's like,

you know, you guys know how phony it is. But it's also, it's not like we're all going fishing, like it's a big, or like my, our bachelor party or a birthday celebration and your... Right, yeah, yeah. You guys aren't like, lighting fireworks and taking bong rips. And we all know what kind of phone calls you're, you're not trying to impress some chick at a bar

or something. When you're doing it, you're playing a game that we all know you have to play. Yeah, but it's like embarrassing to be, like, phony in front of your friends. Yeah. But you're never doing it for like self-aggrandizing reasons. Yeah, well, I mean, I am. doing, you know, to like, fucking profit and kill God. You know?

You know? And ascend. Like, yeah, it's work. And it's like, that's part of the role. It's part of doing the dance. Yeah. I have that meeting today. And, like, part of it was sounding like a writer, you know? Like, talking insane word salad explosions.

They, like, are kind of answers their question, but makes them feel like they really, like, got something out of it. Yeah. I don't know. I wasn't in the van either, right? No, no. That was upstairs. I was upstairs, like. locked in.

I had a very big meeting today, and it was insane to have all that energy and, like, combustion. But, like... I think I can say it was with BET. Yeah, I mean, I wasn't going to say. Sorry. Yeah.

You heard it here first. They said they tried the black thing. They want to do something new. And I'm something new for BET. So, yeah. me and Rich Voss and Nick DiPaolo. I know, DePaolo. I was surprised too.

But they're trying something really new. Yeah. We're doing our three-headed talk show type thing. It's called Three Black Guys. And that's not what Nick wanted to call it. Nick had other pitches. But yeah, I don't know what they're doing. But it was a big meeting.

And I had all the symptoms of anxiety. But I'm so used to like abating. panic attacks that like my brain wasn't flipping out while my body was like you know like heart palpitations like sweatiness like wanting to jump out of your skin my brain was like you know don't don't burn out wow it now now serves stuff in there because like I have this like I can't fight off the fact that like my body is still going to suffer these symptoms but like I feel confident in this like I'm being set up for victory the people involved are like very skilled and powerful.

And it's like, oh, yeah, I'm not going to fuck this up. But my knees are still going to shake. And I'm still going to like want to take a shower. Yeah. I got in the hot tub. And that counts. That was your guys' tub after the show. No, tonight.

We didn't get in. We were bone dry. Yeah, I would have worn these, that they would be soaked. You better know. know what you're doing here you want to plug anything pat cobo's patrick podcast coming to an end because i'm going to break the news on the pod cobbos is

facing manslaughter charges uh they we're trying to get him to talk it down to a DUI but uh you know a deal's a deal says the judge so yeah uh you guys are wrapping it up after 12 crazy years right well

make sure you get in there 30 episodes of fun on Cobos Patrick podcast. They say the key to a successful pod is to do it now and then. Dip your toes in. Yeah, keep them guessing postwise. Get them hooked. Disappear.

Whoa. I have suffered many a foul fart. Pat? Yeah, I've been gone. Pat got me real bad. In my own home. In the home that I pay the mortgage on. Pat curled the pain off the wall.

Absolutely. It was nice, though, because now we know that that frame we have over the couch, it's not real gold. So we kind of did us a favor. Yeah, it turned green. I heard everybody was farting a storm. Sam didn't eat the dip with us, so he wasn't part of it. I had a normal amount of dip. You guys ate it like you guys washed ashore.

Yeah. You guys ate it like, what was his name? Carmen Morales? No. Eli and Gonzalez? Elliot Gonzalez? Yeah, yeah. Whatever.

You guys talk. Carmen Miranda. Yeah. Yeah, we were all going on. Carmin Miranda? Yeah, what was it? Crab meat and olives? It was,

it might as well have been. It was like mayonnaise and salsa, basically, and then maybe some extra spices. No, it was like... Like Taco Bell Mott sauce. Yes, in mayonnaise, basically. So, wait, are you guys describing the Mexicali? Mexicali did.

Yeah. Yes. Emmy's addiction. Because everyone had the bean dip, but not everybody got the gross farts. Yeah. And then I didn't have the Mexicali the first night. And those two did. And they had the farts the next day.

And then I had Mexicali the second night. And I was ravaged. It was so bad. Yeah. It was truly a bad place to be. I'm glad you weren't. Pat legitimately went to bed hours before he was ready to get away. So he wouldn't keep ruining the run.

room. Yeah. He said I have to sequester myself. I told him if he kept farting, he had to go in a different house. He couldn't be in mind. He had to find a new place to stay. Yeah, it was... Because he was ripping it in half in there.

And then Emmy, of course, going, oh, did I do that? She's fucking irkling as she's, you know, quefeing from hell. Dude, did you see Rick's shirt? tonight? Rick? No. Long hair, Rick? No.

It said queen. In the queen font, right? Yeah, I didn't clocked out. I pointed at it, but you were talking and you didn't look and I was like, all right. He'll see it eventually. I did see it, but I didn't go, fun. You should have. Didn't rock me, I guess.

Also, his hat was backwards and I saw that it said, mayor of cuntown. What? both barrels coming and going if you see Rick hey I think your shirt's inappropriate oh do you watch it

write a letter to the mayor read that bitch the only the only guy that works at helium that isn't a manager is the guy in the quefe shirt all he'd have to do to get promoted is change

just wear any other shirt steal a hat from somewhere He's like, I am who I am. I'm Rick. It was six men. It was funny when the fourth guys. I remember all their names. It's like part of my job.

What I'm gay? It's Gabe. Who cares? Why are there six of you? Come talking to Kweep shirt. I want to do business with Kweef shirt.

it was it was crazy because it was like yeah we're we're two of the managers oh nice to meet you and then another guy comes in hey I'm one of the managers here okay so this is a bit I opened the door that I thought was the bathroom guy was in there hey I'm a manager this is my office some lady came in with a tray of drinks

and was like hey you guys need anything and I was like no no are you our green room server and she went well I'm the manager and it's like what And then Becker, before he blew it, Royal, you want to tell him the news? I got promoted. He's promoted to manager at helium. He's leaving us behind.

That's why he doesn't care about the car thing. Yeah, it's not his problem anymore. This isn't free rain to blow it, just because I'm chill or whatever. I understand that. I'm not the cool boss. Well, don't be mad at yourself. No, I'm pretty pissed.

Look. I trusted it. Holding on to your anger is, especially when it's at yourself, what the fuck you do? You're poisoning your vessel. We're laughing, and I'm crying about how many managers there are. You got a sick new job.

What do you think fuels me? Oh, man. You've been, you spent $1,000 on slime buckets since we've been on the road. Yeah. Going insane with goo. What? Oh, he's everywhere we go. He's like, I need to pop in here, go boy.

You know, leaves with a bag jangling. I've gone to the store twice. For what? For what? For what? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Slime.

Slime. Slime. I thought you meant your slime. No, no, no. That would be a different got to party. And you know what kind of guy he is? You know, today we go and we get coffee. Get a smoothie.

You know? Get another coffee later. We're in that coffee shop. I say, Becker, get yourself something out of a cooler. Grab yourself a cold drink over there, cowboy, you know? Kick up your spurs. Gets a lemonade. And, of course, if you met Becker, lemonade, can be tricky.

A can drink. You can go either way. you know mail on sunday mail on sunday so he opens it of course and somehow it's all over him in the ceiling you know he's sticky and he's like oh yeah you know why it's liquid and uh the one behind the counter's like oh does you have a problem with that and he's like oh it's that happens every second care you know she's like oh can i get you a free one and he's like oh it's the last one of the cooler so he walks away he's like No problem.

Duts. Keep shaking it. He walks away and I say, well, you know what? There's not a drink over there. But how about one of those baked goods? That guy loves a chocolate croissant. Work the angle. She said, oh, of course.

Yeah. Over a barrel. Oh, yeah. She said, of course, yeah. I love. I'm so sorry. And I said, hey, I'm delighted, you know? This is great.

This is great news for me. Shake up every can. It's all sticky. As soon as it exploded, she was like, oh, it exploded. Like, fuck, another one exploded. Keeps happening. Yeah. They keep kicking them around.

Way over fizzed. It was like an all natural sparkling lemonade. It's tricky. And it went off like we were pranking a friend. Like it went off like we'd been standing in the garage really good one. Year's Eve. The Browns won the Super Bowl. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. But I weaseled a free chocolate croissant. And you're probably guessing we gave it to him and then we split it outside, you know, triumphant. You'd be wrong. That was your chocolate croissant. It was good. I horsed. I thought I was a meal.

Immediately getting back in the driver's seat, so my mind just went to, like, horse this down so you can drive. Do me a favor and just be there with us. And then we went. Don't be worried about what we have to do. I'm not going to crack a whip at you. Yeah, it's not how it works. I'm not flicking cigarettes out at you. Yeah.

Let me be your boss. I didn't stop for food on my day alone. How about this? It's not all my brain works. What if I boss you around? And I say, you got to chill out, man. Then I'd probably try harder because I'm broken. But yeah, I didn't stop for food.

because it would have been a waste of time on my solo day. What are you talking about? When I didn't get food until I got back to Detroit. Oh, yeah, but that's... But that's me being, like, weird about being efficient and stupid all the time. It's something that's just in me, man. I mean, you went to a car date. You could have had a corn dog.

I could have had one of those greasy burgers. Sure, have a greasy burger. I didn't want those. I didn't want to go anywhere else. Tell them about your big day. They don't know what you're talking about. I went and saw... Not all of them are in your Discord.

The Gilmore car. to be groomed. The Gilmore Car Museum. And I saw the motorama cars. Now, imagine not everyone knows what the fuck you're talking about. Our listener Cadillac Spence, let me know that they were having a show up there with a bunch of rare General Motors concept cars from 1953.

And they had them all amassed in a room. And they haven't been together until this April. The Beatles got back together. This is them playing on the roof. It's when they showed off all the first Corvette. It's the Avengers. of cars. The birth of the American sports car. Gene Gray, Phoenix. Yeah. Rising. Just like that.

First ones. Yeah, they look nuts. I'm glad you went. It seems weird. He took 400 pictures. That you wouldn't eat. The food there that was convenient looked bad. And not bad, but it looked like greasy. How was that stopped you in the past? The what? I've seen you eat crud. Slime. That gives you an idea that it was like real greasy, sloppy burger mess. It didn't look good.

It just looked like food. So I was like, I will figure something else out. And then I figured out going to the weed store and finding a credit union with a scanning ATM thing. Because I was only home for four days, so I didn't replace my broken ATM card. And then... So your priorities were... Dealt with that. And then when I was walking out of the dispensary, I was like, I don't care.

I'll find something on the road. And then I called my buddy who grew up in Ann Arbor and was like, I'm driving past Ann Arbor. What do I get? and he was sending me to a deli, but they were closed. Singermans. They'd closed like 10 minutes before I'd get there. Did you do the...

Say anything outside with your boombox? No, I could have. Let me in. Pastrami Patty! But I'd already pulled over to do that when I pulled it up on the map because he told me which exit, and then I figured out they're going to be closed right before I get there.

And so I was about to stop at Jersey Mikes, and then he texted me like, hey, Becker, don't eat a much trash. Emily's making chicken wings. So I was like, if you were like, you know. Perfect. I don't want to eat. Well, and I didn't want to eat trash because we'd been going pretty fucking.

I'd been going really hard for several days. I know. And finally it got in my stomach normal. So I was like, maybe I don't immediately go back to attacking myself. Right. It was logical. Yeah. So then I got back to the house to eat.

But we didn't eat to like 11. So I got like a little woozy. We made chicken wings. Yeah. I heard that turned out good. So yeah, but it was an efficiency thing where it was like, even though I was alone and not on a schedule, I didn't want to waste a bunch of time. Yeah. Because that would be fucking up and dicking off.

Like, I'm programmed that way. It's from being around people who are working 24 hours a day and mad at me 24 hours a day when I was a kid. I'm only one of those things. Yeah. I know. So, yeah, that's just how I work. I won't be able to not work that way, like, ever. I try really hard.

Well, quit making it my problem. I'm trying to be serves up Sammy over here. Serfs up Sammy. No, I'm not. I've had to make a lot of hardline decisions recently. I have. I've had to be fucking on the ball, so it's nice that Lund hasn't changed. He's still keeping it casual.

I like that. Let's do a little scene. There's a knock at your door. Hello? Is it a vampire? Hey, are you a vampire? Zombies? Hey, do you want some brain?

No, no, I mean like are you a zombie? Well, it's not either of those things, thank God. It's just the Indecloud delivery guy. Let them in quick. Hey, get in my house, delivery guy. You don't want to come in? Too bad. Get in here.

Give me my reefer. Indy Cloud is bringing tricks and treats right to you all season long. Weed in my bowl or bullet. your skull. Zero sugar THC Sotas for watching horror movies on the couch.

God, what a great way to spend time. Scary good. Those days we had off. We were off. You were getting dogs added to your family. We were eating

a lot of into cloud stuff. I mean, we watched Motor City, which is a movie that has five lines of dialogue. And it was awesome. and maybe we're impartial or maybe we were completely fucked up on IndyCloud.

Either way, Motor City rules. I think the Beast Gummies played a role. I mean, I didn't like you getting into that cabinet, but you did. And then it wasn't just the movie that didn't have any dialogue. It was us as well. Right. Great product.

Yeah, we were Gorko Man. They also have scary, good, vape cartridges and Beast Mode all in ones. Plus, extra strength sleep gummies, so you can sleep like the dead. Also, they come in a little pouch that kind of looks like a, I don't know, like a futon, like an elf would sleep on. I like, I just think the branding of those is delightful.

Yeah. I have been relying on the sleep gummies for the night before a flight and the flight. Right, yeah. The sleep gummies are cool, too, because they remind me of those Japanese candies. They have a nice texture, too. Yeah, big fan of all of their different gummies. The rope. Oh, yeah.

The gummy rope is very good. Yeah, that you can't miss whatever you like, whatever tickles your fancy, you're going to be stoked that you want with Indie grope. Oh, my third boob. All Indicloud products are federally legal hemp THC, and everything sold is lab tested. If you're 21 or older, go to Indicloud.co. That's dotc0.com. And use code Chubby for 30% off your first subscription order.

That's Indycloud.cochubby. Your subscription ships regularly and discreetly with free gifts and free shipping on qualifying orders. After you order, fill out the survey and say Chubby Behemoth sent you. Enjoy responsibly and thanks to Indicloud. What's your deal? What do you got? Got a third dog. Yeah.

Made it official when I went home for those few days. It's a little Boston Terry. corgi mix, but there's not much corgi. She's not like super long or anything, but her name was Maggie, but we're calling her Frankie, so it's Beanie and Frankie. And Mama. Mama's still around.

Technically. But, yeah, we wanted, Megan, especially wanted Beanie to have another dog to play with. We don't know how much more time Mama might have because she's slowed way down, and her back legs aren't they don't work really good so she and she never really was one to like play so and she's five times Beanie size so now Beanie has a little wrestling opponent and they've they've been fun and Megan was like I wonder if it's confusing that this dog is just staying over here but the old

owner was a young man who joined the Air Force so he's going to be going up to the spring a bunch. This guy didn't have any friends or family or relatives. No, he and his mom I think tried to rehome the dog for I think a month for about a month and nothing had panned out. I don't know.

She's a carny so she lives on the road. Couldn't travel with the dog. He told me that, I remember. Yeah, she picks up train conductors wherever the train stops and drives them home. So they're both like not able to have this dog and so. Not all angels are on her.

or heaven, summer here on earth. Yeah. So far, so good. We had a nice day yesterday because it was chilly and rainy all day. Megan made chili and we all hung out. So was it cold and rainy or was it chilly and rainy? Oh, yeah. Okay.

All of the above. You said snow was inbound. I thought that's what was meant, but Carlos cleared it up. He meant that we were getting three inches of rain. Did Carlos ask the wind? No, he just like lets me. know when I'm not there if there's like big weather things so that I can have Hunter go check on

shit. I assumed an ancient one like that just speaks directly to the elements. He's way better at forecasting the weather than the weatherman so maybe he does have an inside line. Yeah, I think so. He goes outside barefoot and then the ground kind of tells him what the trees are saying.

Reverberates in him, yeah. And then the wind whispers. But yeah, it was nice to have a little break to go home real quick, but it was funny to immediately come back. I'm glad you weren't home longer. You would have had four or five dogs. Yeah. You got the bug. Well, and it was funny to talk to Gwen. What's her son-cle last name? She fosters older dogs, and she's currently fostering an older dachshund that can't pee on its own,

so she has to squeeze it. Oh, ha. I get toothpaste to squeeze out the whiz. Yeah. Yeah, she sounds very patient. She's a good person. She helped me find a whole fish in Indianapolis one time. Oh, I didn't know why she said that. I thought she was just blasting you for being a cartoon cat or something. No, a lot of people do think that I eat at bones and all, but I don't, actually.

I put the whole fish in and then... Like a xylophone. They used to call it the same T. Heathcliff paid you. And you were telling me that Garfiners. Field has a statue here. Yeah. Hassan told me to...

14 statues and they're all themed with different jobs or occupations. Is he from here? Jim Davis is from Marion, yeah. Marion, Indiana. Yeah, so it's not here. It's close. It's like an hour away. It's a city.

They have Indianapolis and then what, Muncie? Come on. But it's not nearby. So I don't think we'll be making a trip to the Garfield. statues even though Pat would cry. Oh, he would, you know, see himself reflected, representation's so important. We'd have to leave him there.

Well, they'd be a 15th statue if Pat was here. There's a, I guess one of them's He'd be a new occupation. He's Nazi, Nazi Garfield. Yeah, there's Dr. Garfield, firefighter. Yeah, there's the drummer from Kiss Garfield. Yep, that's one of them.

It's the Star Child. The golfer. There's, uh, woman dentist. Garfield. Weird. Yeah, women dentist Garfield. There's truck driver Garfield.

There's a bony driver Garfield. Truck driver Garfield with a gallon piss jug. Yeah. Dude, I wish I would have had two gallons to fill on the drive up. Oh my God. What? Every fucking time. I try to pee as much as I can before I leave.

Three hour drive. I will typically stop within the, either right in town to get. caffeine or a half hour into the drive, maybe an hour into the drive. And when I stop half hour and an hour in, I pee then too. And I think this will be the time when I don't have to desperately piss for the last hour and a half when there's not as many options. Sure. Yep. There's the Greenland exit has no services. It's usually just semis. You can go bear back out there though, right? Piss in the woods or whatever. Yeah. So I do that when it's dark. But like as soon as it gets light out. Like today, I

pass that exit and it's just tons of people coming and going. I don't know why. Cruiser. There's no services. Yeah. People are cruising, man. Yeah. But the sun had also come out. So I need the cover of night to do my thing out there. So instead, I hold it and just go, fuck, fuck, fuck. The last

45 minutes to an hour. Yeah, you're bursting at the scene. Driving. And I used to get like a can of black rifle. and Coke zero or whatever. And then it was just so annoying to always have to piss. So you're just drinking a quart of buttermil. Hewle and buttermilk. No, I thought, oh, I'll be fine if I get a five-hour energy and a soda or a coffee.

Can't piss in a five-hour energy, man. Less liquid. But man, it doesn't matter. No matter what, I got to fucking set the record at Park to Jet every time. I've pissed at Park to Jet a lot. Yeah, usually I... Outside in the parking lot. Oh, no, I can't do that.

Wide open, dude. A lot of the times I would get off at Park DIA and I would have like rushing to my car, you know, coming from wherever. And finally, I know I got to drive fucking La Hanta. So it's like, I had no time to stop and piss. So I would just pee like with the door open just right there and then drive away. Love it. People we walk by, you know, you can give them a wave.

No one that's going on. I would be so embarrassed. No, no one cares. Everyone gets, it's an autonomous zone. It's like we're all jail breakers, you know? We broke out, uh, feng shui. Oh, man. So I have to pee, but I park and the shuttle is like right there, like, pulls around.

So I'm like, fuck. And then I almost get out at the building and just say, I'll get the next one. I'm glad I didn't because in that shuttle I hear on the radio, there's people here and they're waiting for a shuttle. so I would have been annoyed with that. So I have to pee. And I get out at the first stop. I'm at the back of the shuttle.

And this fucking guy, so like everybody is lined up to get. You're on the shuttle having to pee. I have to pee bad, yeah. And we get, you know, the first stop. Everybody's getting out except for like this one dude. And I'm standing by him because there's a bunch of people that are preventing me from going by. And he gives me one of these. And I'll tell you what.

I was like, you in the alley. You were 10 minutes in hell. Well, I think of all the things I want to say, which is like, yeah, no shit. Yeah. Guess what? All of these people are preventing me from passing by you. So give me a sec. But I'd have said nothing.

You know what you do is that you gestured all the people that are in the way. And you go. Yeah, we could have had a pantomime off, but I just, I had to pee so bad. I didn't want an altercation. I didn't sock you in the gut. He thinks it's because I'm terrified, but I'm just bursting. But yeah, it was so dumb where it's like, bro, no shit. I don't want to be touching your knee with my knee right now.

Yeah. But there's nowhere for me to go. Damn, you didn't get mad of that guy? I was mad. I know, but you didn't say anything? I didn't say anything. Oh, that's crazy. All I could do was hold in my whiz until I made it into the fucking airport.

Oh, man. If that guy doing this would have made you lose your focus and then you're pissing your pants, yelling. You wouldn't have been here right now. Yeah. I wouldn't have been allowed into the air. The cops would have come. Soaked in piss.

Animal control. I have a gallon of whiz in my slacks. Yeah, it would have been a whole scene. You pointing at a guy like, I don't, I'm not pissing because I'm scared of you. I need you to know. know that. I had to piss when I got on this goddamn bus. And now you're...

Oh, dude. Also, the driver, the shuttle pulls up to the building. There's four people out there. There's, I think, four seats. He lets two people on and then tells, I think it was an older couple. And he's like, we're full now. And me and this dude looked at each

other and then he just looked at the empty seats and we drove away. And then, like I said, the on the radio, they were like, there's people here waiting for a shuttle. I don't think there was another one. Oh, shit. Usually there's a few of them.

But yeah, I don't know why he did it. I think maybe he thought that there wasn't room for the bags on the rack. Maybe he didn't see that. But I don't think he knew that for sure. And there were seats. So it felt like they, he could have gotten them on. I don't know why he chose to let them rot. Huh.

Yeah. I would have been, I would have been emphatic. I would have said, let me on there, man. Come on. Yeah, they took it. I also wouldn't listen. I would just got on. Yeah, they just sat there and got, God, that sucks.

Old people. Yeah. They lose their agency. Left behind. I left upstairs before we started because I thought that we maybe wouldn't talk about the gas thing. And I was going to say, or I thought about being cheeky and at some point at the beginning of the pod being like, I hope I don't get too tired and run out of gas halfway through the episode. You would have liked when I

Made a Chipotle manager go to their secret line to get me my fajita veggies the other night Seager line Yeah, they always have the to go they have a to go line in all Chipolays that's like off and away from where you're watching them make shit And she tried to be like we all have fajitas in like eight minutes and I was like the line And she like looked over and went like yeah we're out and I was like And she like And ran over there with a thing and put them in and then immediately Sam's behind me

and was like not paying attention or like involved in her thing neither or not I wasn't watching you order and then was like can I get fajitas and I listen to her do it to him too like you have a full thing of fajitas right there you know about the other first time I'm hearing about

him winning but did she get them for Sam no she told Sam like she'll be ready in like four or five minutes and he was like never mine then I said oh no big deal but it was all to prevent her if only there was like my friend here who knew that there was a secret option for Fahita.

Walking from here to there. I've worked in quick service places. You should have said, excuse me, but I can't see my good friend be done dirty in this way. Sam, step back. Lady, go to the line. You're going to be in my discord.

She's saving those for a potential upcoming order. On the to-go line. Get those in the new ones. Yeah. Split it between the two. yeah what is this work coming to I don't know I

well what are you gonna do hey but I did have a thought why would you when I did it with like the slight gesture like yourself on fire in front of parliament yeah

yeah huh so yeah you stuck a tour and meanwhile I didn't get my fiber intake that meal you're all cramped I couldn't be in more pain the staggering amount of pain

from crampage from lack of fajita vegetables Oh, no. And treason, I guess. At two, Becker. Stab wound to the back. Also, do you have PayPal? Mm-hmm.

That's funny, too, because I, like, paid you guys, you know, a little good work last week. Yeah. I had some money come in. You guys were out on the road. And then, oh, the gasoline. But I know you just give in your anger and go nuts all the time and you love it. It's like your whole thing. It's becoming pissed.

No. Oh, yeah. Don't you think I'm way better about that? I don't know. Traffic still, like, sets you off. But that, like, when someone else is driving and, like, some guy, like, gets on it and you're like, you, dumb motherfucker, go ahead. Like, you get mad at traffic a lot more than.

I'd say the volumes. I think your spike is less slow. Yeah, those aren't. Those aren't as much real anger as it's just, you say it. And that's it. Okay. That's good for me to know. Yeah.

Because if you're just like, oh, look at this jagoff. it sounds like you're angry. Right. Then, okay. That's good. Yeah, I've gotten way better at that. I told you, I don't look at people when I drive because I don't want to see that they're on their phone. You're saying that has made me realize that I needed to stop.

And it's way better. It helps so much with me. Let's stop being on your phone. No. He's losing my temper when I'm passing somebody or something and not looking to see how stupid they're being. Megan, you guys are both. Yeah, you used to be a kind of guy and you're still like a. that guy

I used to be fuck you or like a gun or like a knife but now now it's usually a sarcastic thumbs up

which feels good but it's not as aggressive right it's the thumbs up that the head coach of the Oklahoma Sooners gave us when we screamed coach out of Switzerland

I think he might have done like a it was like a Nixon yeah Yeah, I You have gotten better I say things But I'm not Rocked

I don't like follow anybody I just Did you used to follow people? I mean no But There was a time When I was driving home To Trinidad

And I think Around Walsenburg There was a A car that got onto the highway You remember the license Played over Yeah I wish.

A car got onto the highway and immediately as I'm passing it gets over into the left lane and it didn't make a lick of sense. It must not have seen me at all. I only didn't hit them because I sped up thinking that they might blow it and then they did. And I wanted, I like slowed down and I think was like hoping that they would pull over because I wanted to talk about it with my fists. But that was years ago. Okay.

And with Megan one time in Pueblo, we went to Sam's Club and loaded up the car. No, a car fucking got mad at me because we had a left turn arrow. We were going on to the highway and a car was coming from the right and almost certainly had a yield. But just fucking came in and then was so mad at me that they like drove real slow. And when I tried to, on the highway, when I tried to pass, he cut me off. And because Megan was in the car, I had to be pretty tame. But I was furious. I was Terminator Vision where I just wanted desperately to be able to, like, teleport

Megan far away where she couldn't see what I wanted to do. Foof, it was. But I had to let that go because she was with me, and I couldn't, like, get crazy with it. We were all weighed down with, like, chips and soda for mutiny. So I just had to take it and be like, yeah, all right. all right, this is okay. Hopefully he'll, and, you know, he exited. Yeah.

I didn't follow. No, I never, like, went out of my way to follow anybody or anything because... Oh, I have. Yeah. I have for sure followed people home. That's dangerous. Yeah, it's bad news. Yeah.

No, it's insane. It's a terrible decision. But, yeah, it's nice to feel a lot more in control. Even if I get a little mad at stuff, it's never really, like, like, I don't lose it and it bite my tongue most of the time

I don't say anything so that's good or like when people try to pass you leaving the airplane the most I say is I'm getting off

the plane too that's a little snarky but I don't call them a dumb ass or throw their hat into the onto the tar man cap gun them

remember this one when they had a hat on and someone to hit happy button oh God It hurt, yeah. Fuck, what, I was watching that Raygun thing. I finally watched the rest because you and I started it that weird afternoon.

Yeah. And watching that one small Polynesian lady slide on her head with her hat on. I was like, it was like nails on a chalkboard watching it at first because I was like, no, the fucking. She has a special sliding hat. I'm sure it's special. I thought of that immediately. But at first I was like, why? It's made it ceramics.

Why the fuck would you ever get tough enough to do that? That's an insane thing. to build up too. Because of the button. This, like, weird rivet button that's on top. And you go up to somebody, bop it.

It's hell on earth for a split second. I don't think we knew about that one. Oh, happy button was tough. Fucked. Well, thank you for letting us vent to you directly into your ear holes.

We love you. And we'll see you out there in this crazy world. Au revoir.