Cinepals - THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES Reaction & Review!

Episode Date: January 16, 2025

Achara and Kristen return to Middle Earth for the 3rd installment in The Hobbit series, The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies! The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies (2014) brings the epic conclusion to Bilbo Baggins’ journey as he faces the aftermath of reclaiming Erebor, where alliances are tested, and a battle for the fate of Middle-earth unfolds among dwarves, elves, men, orcs, and a deadly dragon. Directed by Peter Jackson (The Lord of the Rings trilogy, King Kong, The Lovely Bones), the film stars Martin Freeman (Sherlock, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Love Actually), Ian McKellen (The Lord of the Rings trilogy, X-Men series, Gods and Monsters), Richard Armitage (The Hobbit trilogy, Ocean’s 8, Spooks), Evangeline Lilly (Lost, Ant-Man, Real Steel), Luke Evans (Dracula Untold, Beauty and the Beast, Fast & Furious 6), Lee Pace (Guardians of the Galaxy, Pushing Daisies, Foundation), Benedict Cumberbatch (Doctor Strange, Sherlock, The Imitation Game), Orlando Bloom (Pirates of the Caribbean series, The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Carnival Row), Cate Blanchett (Blue Jasmine, Carol, Thor: Ragnarok), Hugo Weaving (The Matrix series, V for Vendetta, The Lord of the Rings trilogy), and Christopher Lee (Star Wars prequel trilogy, Dracula, The Lord of the Rings trilogy).   SOCIAL MEDIA ~KRISTEN STEPHENSONPINO~ Instagram: @Kris10Kesp ~ACHARA KIRK~ Instagram: @AcharaKirk ~CINEPALS~ YouTube: @CinePals Insta: https://instagram.com/TheCinePals Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheCinePals

Sinha. Pals. Hi, what's up? Hey, we're back with The Hobbit, another extended edition of The Hobbit. Not as extended as the Lord of the Rings, but don't worry, we'll get there. This is the last movie in the trilogy, The Hobbit, the Battle of the Five Armies. I don't want it to end. But I do want to know what happens next. Yeah, I want to see them defeat Smog. Smog.

Smog. We're going to jump into this, you guys. If you want to watch the watch along with us, you can do that on Cinderjump. come otherwise stick around let's jump into it yeah ma how do you even like oh what do you do after an adventure like that you know like there's no way you can go back to normal no there's no way you can't uh-uh you just yeah i would feel like i would need to continue doing something like my purpose just ended so abruptly and yeah i mean i guess you can't ever really go back to the way life was before although he did live there for like a

really long time you know and then until finally at 111 he's like you know what I think I'm ready for my next adventure I'm going to go off and leave and and do this other thing but like I really enjoyed that that was that was a lot of fun and it ended like kind of broke my heart yeah with it. I thought it was going to be happier. Like, I just didn't remember the story, I guess. I'm shocked that they wiped out the entire line

of brothers. But I guess, like, you know, with his cousin being in charge and stuff, he doesn't have that curse on his family bloodline. Yeah, I guess so. So, that's done. That was gnarly. Yeah. When it started and it

began with the death of Smau, Where are we going to go from here? Like, the big bad dragon is dead. That's what I thought too. Yeah, I was like... Because I thought that was the end. Yeah, I was like, this is literally the beginning of the movie and you've just killed

the bad guy. Like, what the hell is going on? And then it was like, oh, no, there's another thing that's going on that is like deeper and darker, perhaps. And then, of course, we have the massive epic war that starts. And in some ways, I'm like, dang. That was even gnarlier than like some of the battles that we got in Lord of the Rings. A lot more.

Yeah. It was a lot more gruesome. They really love going for those heads. Yes. Which is like my foie. But you know what's crazy about this one? I feel like on this one we finally started carrying more about the dwarves that we're traveling with. Yeah.

And we started knowing more of them. Like there were still like a few where we're like, I don't really know much about it. you yeah kind of there we still cared about him and I'm like but I'm just like I'm still so dumbfounded that the fact that they killed all three of the brothers but I guess that's the only way the dwarves can yeah survive right I guess so I mean that that's a that's a way to go I mean it's it's realistic too right I mean not not everyone survives in war and sometimes you lose friends we just came so far yeah and not like and they took our favorites they did And I'm like, kind of like, normally we sacrifice the ones that we kind of like, but they're not

like our favorites, or we just sacrifice one favorite. Yes. You know, and save the rest. I really love the moment where Bilbo brought out the egg corn. Because in that moment, it was like that realization of, wow, so such a simple life. Like that's so beautiful, you know. And like their whole friendship and their bond, how it grew over this course. of time is actually very, it was a very beautiful story. Yeah. And I think like the message of, you know,

home being more valuable than all the gold in the world. I thought that was really sweet and that really touched me. You really see how greed can bring about so much evil in the world. And, and, like, you know, Thorin and his forebears were taken over by so much greed. But Thorin was able. to overcome it and see the right side. And that had to do with Bilbo because of, you know, the purity of the hobbits that you love so much, you know, he reminded Thorin of what's important. And I thought that Martin Freeman gave such a lovely performance,

like at the end when he was like, he was my, and he couldn't say the word. I was like, oh, my God, I feel it. He was amazing. Yeah. like I love my hobbits I love him yeah oh my gosh and I'm like trying to think because I kept thinking about like the other hobbits right and I love and adore them too but Bilbo has like he's on a whole other level they can't touch I like that they made him the OG number one yeah right yeah because when we're watching Lord of the Rings we're like oh my god Sam you know I mean Sam is still OG Sam is still goated he's definitely Yes, 100%. But Bilbo, man, he, like, rose to the occasion and he was solo.

Yes. He didn't even have friends, which I think with Lord of the Rings, the other hobbits, because they had themselves, they, you know, they had more of that, like, stay true to the Hobbit ways where Bilbo had himself alone, he had to adapt a lot more. Yeah, 100%. In order to, like, not just, like, fit in. but to grow with them and not get left behind.

Yeah. Which is pretty cool. And like that boy, he earned that spawn on that shit, man. Yeah. I'm like, and it makes me, if I watched,

I feel like if I would have watched this and then I watched the, I watched Lord of the Rings and saw Bilbo get on that boat, I probably would have bowled my eyes out, honestly. Right. With what I know now and watching this,

I would have, I would have lost it. I would be like, he deserves that. Yeah. It's kind of interesting to watch it, like, in this order. Obviously, it's like the release order of, like, how the movies came out, even though I'm pretty sure, I think the Hobbit came out before the Lord of the Rings.

Because I saw the cartoon, the one I told you about, that's really, really, really old, a long time ago. And I remember watching going, I feel like this is this. And I wasn't sure until you told me, you're like, oh, that's the same. thing yeah so they came out long time ago yes it was the hobbit yes um and i just remember it watching it long time ago when i was really young and that was it and then so it was it was very interesting for me and i've never read any of the books or anything but i did see that that old all cartoon yeah and so it just kind of gives you a little bit of context as to like who bilbo is and why he's important and like just the amazing adventure that he went on

And I really did appreciate, like, the cast of characters that we got to see in the movie and having the chance to see Galadriel as, like, a really, really badass. Because, like, you did, you did get the sense of her power in Lord of the Rings, I feel, but you didn't really get to see the full scope of it. Like, you saw it here when she was fighting the, like, Sauron and the Nazcaul and stuff. Yeah, she's, like, crazy with it. I didn't I like you I I didn't realize how intent she is yeah I really didn't like now I'm like now when I think back on Lord of the Rings I'm like broke it out but don't talk to her like it made me feel like a little bit more like I'm nervous for you right right yeah even though she's like gorgeously stunning and beautiful um I enjoyed

Radagast as well. I thought he was just such a sweet, weird, quirky little wizard. He's cute. I do like him. I appreciate him. Yeah. He's a little gross, but like I think he's so sweet. Yeah. I like how sweet they've made these characters. Like they're so, they're so likable because they're so sweet, but tough. And like, it's like that perfect balance of, oh my gosh, you're so lovable. And then you're like, you're also an asshole damn you're a badass asshole and then you're like yeah they're like the guys that you're like

I will rally for you 100% I'm down for your cause there were some really great battles in this as well which I suppose with a title being the battle of the five armies like yes that totally makes sense like how can you call a movie the battle of whatever

and not deliver on the battles because it was intense and I was surprised because sometimes when movies just have a lot of fighting back to back and like battles back to back, I get a little bit of like battle fatigue, I think, where I'm like, oh, it's a little bit too much. Like, hurry it up. Yeah. But I think that I didn't really feel that as much here because it, like, it was so interesting watching all of the battles go down.

And they were really creative with like the choreography and the way that people were fighting. Like, I really enjoyed watching the dwarf, the one that ended up being king, his cousin, Thorin's cousin, the way he was fighting on the pig and everything was really cool. And just, like, the different ways that you have, like, the elves moving. And you know, you already know that they're really badass, but then you have the dwarves coming in on the ramps and stuff. And they just wiped up shop real good. Yeah. Like, those arrows with that. Yeah.

What was that? That was wild. Like, I was not expecting that at all. It was so crazy. and like the way that they went after azog and like the final battles and stuff like that like they they really just went balls to the wall with it i like the line where it says never underestimated dorf how many times so were we underestimated them yeah even though they told us don't underestimate them and then when the king came out to like fight with them they rallied and hold ass and they're like

oh my god look at that and they're like they're just die-hards yeah a little hot hit It's, I liked, I absolutely love this entire franchise. Yeah, I'm, I just, I enjoyed it so much. And like, I also enjoyed, uh, Toriel. I thought that she was a great addition. And in a way, it made, uh, Keeley's death even more sad because of that romantic aspect of it, you know, where it's like, they never properly really said that they loved each other. And then they, it seemed like maybe there was a chance that they were.

going to be together and then in the end he died. The part that killed me was the realization when Nachara goes, they didn't even kiss and you're kissing his corpse. I was like, I know, I ruined it, sorry. I was like, you just had to go there.

I did, I'm sorry. I'm not going to lie that. I was like, damn. But it's true though. It sucks. It does suck. It sucked. Because it's like, I knew this, but when you said it, I was like, damn. yeah and I couldn't help I'm like I want to laugh because it's so it's so effed up it is so messed up

it is like they didn't get they didn't get their chance to be together although it broke my heart when she was when she was saying to the king like yeah is this love take it away take it away because it hurts too much I'm like oh god yeah I like that moment yeah she like Evangeline Lilly killed it I thought she did she really did and then still her fault he died I know she just but like she was focusing I know he was so focused and then she was just like run around and been like oh let me find him yeah when she saw him she could have like snuck up on and helped it yeah and just like helped him out and then he would have been like bay it's so good to see you yeah I like that legoless regardless of her love for the the dwarf the elf dwarf sorry yeah let me do it again i i i like how legless

like regardless of her love love for the dwarf he still loved her regardless and was like i'm going to keep showing up for you yeah like i like that he stayed true to that like i love you and even though you don't want me i'm going to be there and protect you and i'm going to show up for you and like i love how he chose his love over his father and the kingdom and defended her, knowing she did not belong to him. Yeah, that was, that also kind of broke my heart. Yeah, because it was like, oh, man. I, because I read someone saying in the comments on one of our Lord of the Rings reaction that, like, for instance, for elves, like Arwen, when she fell in love with Aragon, it's not just like a frivolous thing because when an elf falls in love they imprint yeah they fall in love forever i remember that from

the um lord of the rings right yeah so that's what that's why when she glue like when she blew up oh she's a killing him and stuff yeah i was like was that the imprint yeah and so it's sad because yeah she she loves keely and then uh legolas loves her and so it's like well can't do anything about it We love who we love. And so the best we can do is just try and support them because we love them. Yeah. And the best part is she fell in love with the dwarf and the Legolas become best friends of the dwarf. It just makes me happy.

I know. It makes me so happy. I just wanted to see like a little half dwarf elf children at the end. Somehow I was like that would just really make my day. If I could see, I don't know how that would work. Would they be like just normal? or like a little bit shorter but like really cute human size yeah i don't know i don't know i feel like we didn't talk about smog enough like we barely talked about him in the second one which was

because i thought that we'd get more of him yeah for whatever reason we did not in this one which we did not because he like we said earlier he died really quickly i know about uh benedict cumberbatch doing this uh the character and what's even more amazing is he didn't just do the voice for the dragon yeah he also did the mocap like you can you can watch video of him and he's literally like crawling around on the floor and like he's really getting into it yeah because he's that committed that's cool yeah the dragon was really i thought the dragon was done very well and i almost like i really liked the dragon i didn't want the dragon to go i know like my hopes are wrong but it would have been nice

like he's just such a cool edition it would have been cool if he liked you know if he liked Bilbo and like they had like a little buddy buddy connection or something and like so he has like a dragon friend

that's that's your that's your dream because he was so cool different franchises okay there are other books and movies where like Shrek we yes like shrek or you know um what is it called is it elden or something or by yeah anyway um where people become friends with their dragons and they they ride them and stuff like that but not this one i know but you know i i just have to train your dragon there you go that's a franchise for you

where where we get some cool dragon friendships it's not this one though oh i know All I know, I like the way that the dragon looked. I liked the way he moved. I liked the coins falling out of his scales. Yeah. The details were great. I loved how his stomach lit up. Yeah.

Like everything they did with him was awesome. There's one thing I did not like. Oh, what is it? I did not fully like all the CGI that we had with Legolas. I felt like they almost did too much with him. Yeah, he was looking kind of strange. Yeah, like, I mean, he had cool moments, don't get me wrong. There was cool moments and, like, there's things I did like and, like, love the guy.

But I almost feel like they, like, way, like, they overdid him so much that I didn't feel like they needed to do that. And so sometimes I was just kind of like, I felt like I was in a video game with him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I didn't really like that because it kind of pulled me out of the film. It was the only time that I would get pulled out is when they would zoom out and he was really small. was just going so like and it looked like he was just like flying right right yeah and I didn't really like that because I felt like they they still could have done things like more like hands-on I feel like and still made him look just as cool that's my only critique honestly that was the only

thing because I felt like the dragon CGI epic yeah there was not one thing about that that I was like oh this looks like it's overdone or too much or whatever I actually really really enjoyed everything about the dragon yeah i mean i feel like when you're when you're doing like a big scale fantasy film like this there are certain things that you want to spend your money on when it comes to effects and and and like a dragon is definitely one of them but if you're going to use that much of legless bro come on there's way too much of him in there that where it was like it's like all right if you're used that much spend that money that's true and i'm like you're like you're like you know what i mean and i'm like you already went you're already going big you're already spending it very well and wisely that was the

only part for me that i feel like they messed up on i did have this thought cross my mind as we were watching it i was like oh man as much as i really enjoy all of these other characters yes i really miss bilbo because there was like a whole large chunk of it where he wasn't there and we were focused on like so many other characters and then when he came back i I was like, oh, it's, oh, it's Bilbo again. Yay. Like, he's here. And, like, I love him.

We love him. And I just want to see more of him because, like, the movie is called The Hobbit. It's not called the elves. Yeah, it's not called like the dwarves. It's not called the Fellowship of the Dwarves. Or the Ox. Yeah, it's literally The Hobbit. And there was like a large chunk of it where we didn't get the

it and and that I felt I was just kind of like oh that seems like we missed a trick there because you know we've been saying how great he is and how great Martin Freeman is as Bilbo and then to just kind of be like oh you know two-thirds of the film there's no Bilbo yeah I felt I felt a little disappointing but otherwise I'm glad you brought that up because I I felt that too and then I also felt like it became a different film like almost it became the humans film for the for a while I felt like I did at one point forget what I was watching because I didn't see Bill Bowich. You're like, wait, what film is this?

And then it was like all about, you know, it was all about the humans, which was great. Yeah. But I did feel like a completely different film. I don't know what it was about the humans. When they came in, it felt very out of place for me sometimes. And then when the others started to come back in, I'm like, oh, that's right. Yeah, we've got dwarves.

We've got elves. And we've got, we've got humans. And I mean, I guess the human plight is there just to kind of remind us of... Remind us. We're in there, too. Yeah, and just like how awful war is. Like, we, you know, we see all the refugees and the children and the women and old people who are, like, defenseless and all that. So, you know, it's an important reminder. Yeah.

Yeah. I will say this, too. The weasel? Oh, God. The weasel, honestly, I could not stand him. Yeah, right? Alfred. That's his name.

Is it an old friend? He was terrible. Terrible, but you know what? He almost made this one. I almost feel like without him in this film. Oh, yeah. It wouldn't have had, honestly, I feel like there's a big part of me that wants to give it to him and be like, he kind of held the glue.

Like he was kind of the glue. We need someone to hate. He kind of, he was the missing piece that allowed things to tie in together. Right. where it made you go, mm-hmm, he was like, he was like the popping like,

bang. And I'm like, damn. And I'm not 100% sure if I liked the way he died. I kind of did. No, because I wish it was kind of like a,

oh, you wanted to see him just like, or yeah, like I kind of like a, like I think he just was like, like maybe no, don't pause me on that part, okay?

Because that's like, I just, I like, you know, he's like, like in the mouth. And that was it. And then his chain,

like the money just came out. I know. It was kind of like a comedy death, I guess, because he was kind of like a silly character. And while we did, he did a good job though. Yeah,

he really, he did a really great job. He did a good job being slime. Yeah, because like we really did hate him. And, and like so many times were just like, ah,

why is this guy still here? Why is he still alive? I'm like, kill him. Yeah. And then I'm like, not like that, though. Like, rip his head off. Like,

Yeah, I don't think you can do that to him, though, just because he is kind of comedy. And so the way he went was kind of comedy, you know. I was hoping to maybe, like, maybe in that, I don't know, there's a part of me that, like, kind of like, as much as I hated him, there's a part of me that kind of liked him. But that's because I felt like he was that pop. He was that, he, I feel like he brought this film together very well. Yeah. Especially on the parts where it kind of seemed like it was like, you know, like this.

little bit, I was kind of hoping maybe this is, maybe he's going to get a little courage here. Yeah, I think he's going to get a little courage. And I was kind of rooting for him a little bit to make a comeback and like maybe help Gandalf. And then from there, everybody was like, all right, you're all right. You know, you're like, all right, I forgive you, bro. We love a comeback story. I was kind of holding on to that because I thought he was great. He was great. He made me hate him like he made us hate him like very very much but at the same time like part of me like wanted him about that redemption a little bit but at the same time i wanted him to get eaten so it's kind of cool to feel like i don't know what to do with you man it's so interesting because alfred

lick spittle the character is also another character that is not in the book and they just like gave him so much screen time they did they gave him a lot they gave him a lot because he was great he was great he was fun he was really fun to hate and i would i do wonder if there is a version of this that could be edited down to more accurately portray the book the book you know if if we just took out all the superfluous characters and things that weren't actually in the book is there a version of this movie like could it be one movie maybe because they were still there would i felt like maybe i think maybe too maybe i don't know i feel like just with these additional characters and like battles and fights and things being like stretched out as long as they

were i wonder if if there was a version where we just like have all of the the best parts and like and all of the parts that like help it to build just like i don't know maybe like three or four hours i feel like there's a version of that i feel like we could get it down to two maybe yeah even two like three or four is like long I felt like how many did we watch we watched three and it was like a total of about nearly nine hours the last one was the weakest one oh interesting which is I felt like the other ones were very like interest because I felt like I was just so on this journey of like so so so so so so and then I felt like the last one I feel like it was I did feel it was a little too stretched for some of it and totally could have been like this like if they see I felt that about the second one more oh really although there were definitely moments in this where I was like we could definitely

like tighten it up I feel like there's a lot of strong moments in this I think we might be able to do like three hours three hours you would have to tighten some things on the first one ah you know what there's a few I'm trying to fit it into one

but I kind of think I like the two and I think the two and I think the third is me just drooling for more and it's like we don't necessarily need it but I'm like please give it to me well yeah I think it just because the world is so inviting and the characters you don't want to die you don't you don't want to finish you don't want to keep going like right now if they had a fourth one a part of me is like let's watch it let's watch it I want more but another part me is like I don't want to ruin it but I'm going to sit there and I'm going to watch it anyways yeah until until I get bored you know what I mean until it like it almost turns into

a series where you're like, I'm over the same concept or whatever. There is so much Lord of the Rings content out there now. Like there's the show Rings of Power. Really? Yes. Which I only watch one season of it. But after watching all of these

with you now, I'm like... Can't touch it? Or can you touch it? I kind of want to go back just because you don't want the world to add. I don't want the world for exactly your reason. Even though I definitely had some issues with the first season, although I hear that the second season is a lot better than the first. So if you decide to watch it, then just kind of, you know, slog through the first season.

Yeah. And then see how you feel about the second. Because like now I'm like, oh, I think I do want to watch Rings of Power. Well, we should. Yeah. Why not? Why not? I just think that this franchise is addicting because of the adventure, the different dynamics, the fantasy, that, that world that's so fascinating. And you think about, wow, step outside of that bubble, step outside your comfort zone. Let's go. And then I feel like it's always that bittersweet going home. You're like, I don't want to be here.

Like, I love home, but I don't want to be here. Maybe like just, I want to tap that base. I don't know, like, you know, tap home for like a split second, almost like, when you go home for a holiday to see your family and then you're like all right a week's been good i'm back out there like you know what i mean see you next time i'm a naturally a storyteller so i love stories and i feel like this franchise just has stories within stories yeah the lore is really deep you can just break into so many different roots that i'm like i want to be a part of that world. Yeah. And I'm loving it. And I want to go in as a hobbit. I would be a hobbit. I think I might have to choose

a hobbit, a brave one. I would want to be like Bilbo. But a part of me is like, damn, being an elf's free dope. I know. I think I might have to go for elf myself. But I know, but I mean, I was thinking about the elf. I'm like, well, if I want to be beautiful and badass, then be the elf. But if I want to be just glorious, I want to go for a hobbit. Yeah, that's true. I think I want to be glorious. Hell yeah. I think I want to be the unpredictable and the one that people underestimate. I feel like that one suits you the best. I know. I think I've got to be a hobbit, man.

And you're also small. I just won't fall off my chair. Yeah, I think, I think, you know, I think I might have to be a hobbit. And you know what? I think out of all of them, part of me is just like, I want to marry the hobbits. All of them. All of them.

I'm like, I love all of them. I'm like, I mean, I don't know, I say, you either go for the haughty or you go for like that, I don't know, that soul's got me. You go for the one with heart. I got, I got to get that, I got to get the, the heart and the soul and like the, that, that little, like, I got courage, even though I've never been here before, but I will do it. And I'm like, oh, yeah. Yeah, I'll try. I'm done.

Yeah. I think my mentality is like that, though. I'll try anything once kind of deal. yeah uh like to learn i'm a hobbit yeah you're a hobbit yeah we're done you're a hobbit anyway what do you guys think about the series uh of the hobbit i do think obviously it you can't touch the lord of the rings trilogy that that trilogy is incredible but i was pleasantly surprised by this series and i actually really enjoyed it and i would definitely rewatch it so i mean that's like two thumbs up for me i think so let us know

your thoughts in the comments below. Did you enjoy watching this with us? And yeah, we'll see you next time. I'm a Chara Cook. This is Kristen Steven Spinole. Chau!