Club Random with Bill Maher - Barbara Eden | Club Random

Episode Date: August 25, 2025

This week Bill finally meets the genie of his boyhood dreams – and yes, he even brought the bottle. Barbara Eden drops by for a warm, witty time capsule only a true showbiz legend can deliver: memories of Elvis Presley, the 60th anniversary of I Dream of Jeannie, belly-button “censorship” and why the bottle was never allowed in the bedroom. Bill gives Barbara an OnlyFans crash course she never asked for, and Barbara tells Vegas war stories with George Burns and Shecky Greene, including the wildest “show must go on” tale you’ve ever heard. It’s a conversation as magical as Jeannie herself. Subscribe to the Club Random YouTube channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/c/clubrandompodcast?sub_confirmation=1⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Watch episodes ad-free – subscribe to Bill Maher’s Substack: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://billmaher.substack.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you listen: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/ClubRandom⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support our Advertisers: Get 50% off your first box plus free breakfast for 1 year at https://www.factormeals.com/random50off Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at https://www.trueclassic.com/RANDOM! #trueclassicpod #ad  It’s summer, and it's time to heat up your strategy before your competitors beat you to it. Go to ⁠⁠https://www.RadioActiveMedia.com⁠⁠ or text RANDOM to 511-511. Message and Data Rates May Apply. Buy Club Random Merch: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://clubrandom.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices ABOUT CLUB RANDOM Bill Maher rewrites the rules of podcasting the way he did in television in this series of one on one, hour long conversations with a wide variety of unexpected guests in the undisclosed location called Club Random. There’s a whole big world out there that isn’t about politics and Bill and his guests—from Bill Burr and Jerry Seinfeld to Jordan Peterson, Quentin Tarantino and Neil DeGrasse Tyson—talk about all of it.  For advertising opportunities please email: [e-mail] ABOUT BILL MAHER Bill Maher was the host of “Politically Incorrect” (Comedy Central, ABC) from 1993-2002, and for the last fourteen years on HBO’s “Real Time,” Maher’s combination of unflinching honesty and big laughs have garnered him 40 Emmy nominations. Maher won his first Emmy in 2014 as executive producer for the HBO series, “VICE.” In October of 2008, this same combination was on display in Maher’s uproarious and unprecedented swipe at organized religion, “Religulous.” Maher has written five bestsellers: “True Story,” “Does Anybody Have a Problem with That? Politically Incorrect’s Greatest Hits,” “When You Ride Alone, You Ride with Bin Laden,” “New Rules: Polite Musings from a Timid Observer,” and most recently, “The New New Rules: A Funny Look at How Everybody But Me Has Their Head Up Their Ass.” FOLLOW CLUB RANDOM https://www.clubrandom.com https://www.facebook.com/Club-Random-101776489118185 https://twitter.com/clubrandom_ https://www.instagram.com/clubrandompodcast https://www.tiktok.com/@clubrandompodcast FOLLOW BILL MAHER https://www.billmaher.com https://twitter.com/billmaher https://www.instagram.com/billmaher Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hi, I'm Heather McDonald, gossip enthusiast, podcast queen, and longtime loyalist to Amazon Prime. Between next day Prime deliveries, binge-worthy shows, and playlists that keep me company while digging into the latest gossip, Prime is my silent co-hosts. The truth is, Prime doesn't just support my passions. It fuels them from spontaneous curiosities to full-blown obsessions. It's got my back. Whatever you're into, it's on Prime. Visit Amazon.com.ca.ca. get more out of whatever you're into. Clubb Random is sponsored by True Classic, a clothing brand that aims to differ from the rest. Most t-shirt brands claim to fit great or feel amazing, but these actually deliver.

They fit exactly how you want a shirt to fit, snug in the chest and shoulders, relaxed around the stomach. But the part I like the best about True Classic, they don't cost a ton, and they're comfortable. Like, I forgot I was wearing it comfortable. find True Classic at Target, Costco, or just go to trueclassic.com slash random and try one. This is Trixie Mattel, call host of The Bald and the Beautiful podcast, Drag Queen, and Amazon Prime enthusiast. And I'm Katya, interpretive dancer, chaos agent, and someone who orders from Amazon Prime more often than I check my email. That's true. Yeah.

Prime gives us fast delivery that makes unpacking almost glamorous, endless streaming of our favorite shows, which we call research, and music playlists that are both chaotic and calming. Prime isn't just convenient. It's a gateway to trying new things. It helps us discover new obsessions and dive deeper into old ones. From one day delivery to top shows to music, whatever you're into, it's on Prime. Visit Amazon.ca.ca. slash Prime to get more out of whatever you're into. The bottle was not...

Oh, that's interesting. Could never be in my master's bedroom. Master's cool, but not the bottle there. actual dead guy oh yeah but he was good for your show no Barbara I saw your feet I knew you were coming really the rest of me's attached how are you I'm great I'm so glad to see you and you oh my gosh you're making a 12 year old boy very happy right now. Are you serious? Well, you know, I mean, I don't know you at all. We're just meeting for the first time, so I probably shouldn't be this intimate right away, but I brought your bottle. I had this in my

house. That's an upgrade of a bottle. But it's a little like it, right? It is. It's prettier. Yeah. You weren't in a lamp. You were in a bottle. I was in a bottle, and it was a working bottle. So I gave mine to the Smithsonian. It belongs there. But it doesn't look so pretty. I mean, it may disappoint people because it's been through the war. Well, you know, some people, when they get identified so much with something that's iconic, you know, it becomes too much and they almost, and they kind of don't like it.

And I, you know, like, come on, man, if you wrote Hotel California, why don't you, I play it every night. Right. You know, I hope you're, like, happy with, you know, that you should be because what you were and are iconic and for a reason. And it was awesome. And there's a reason we remember it to this day, so vividly. Well, I enjoyed doing it. I felt very lucky that I was doing it. And, of course, you know, I was under contract to Fox and MGM before I ever did Journey.

Yeah, you did an Elvis movie. I sure did. What was that? It was the... There he is. That's from an album cover. God love him. Yeah, I'm...

Sweet, good gentleman. He was just the best... Yeah, because you were too old for. You were in your 20s. No, I think I was married to Michael and Sarah. That didn't matter. It's that you weren't 14. Okay.

He had a... He had a thing. Well, you know... Actually, we talked a lot of... about that. Really? Because he wanted to know how, you know, how it is in a film. They're setting up the pictures, the lights and everything.

So we had a lot of time to talk. Yeah. And he wanted to know about my marriage with Mike and how did we make it work in this business. What year is this? It was about, I married Mike in 1958, so it was 60. It was probably 1960. Yeah. Sixty was Flaming Star.

That's it. You got it. You got it. Really? Oh, yeah. Flaming Star. Yes. Okay, I remember it now.

Yeah, yeah. He was good. He was good. He could have been a really respected actor. Yes, he could have. That fucking criminal who managed him. Yeah. Had let him have the career he could have had.

You know what he said about that? He said, you know, Barbara, a lot of people don't like the colonel, and they think that I should leave him. And he said, but he got me out of that little podant place I was playing. He said, if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be here today. And I just, I thought, God bless you. Yeah. I mean, talent more than anybody, but yes.

Yes, the colonel did do that. But there is, I think, or should be a statute of limitations on how much we owe people for, you know, it's not a, it's not a lifelong contract. Right. You know, if that really was his motivation, I have a feeling maybe the... He was very honest. Oh. I can tell when somebody's not. And Elvis was very direct and honest.

And because then I said, you know, Michael, I, business. That's the work. I said, this is a business. I said, it's our job. We both do our job. Then we come home at night. And he said, well, he said, I met somebody. I really like a lot. But she's kind of young. I didn't know she was that young. I mean, honestly, for Tennessee, not so much. And, you know, Elvis was born in 1935. Yeah. in Tupola, Mississippi. I mean, it was not the, you know, now capital of the world at the time or probably now. I mean, still in there are states where the legal marriage age is really young. Yeah. Like 16. It's just, you know, and people just didn't, they just didn't think the same way.

I used to do jokes about the songs. Remember, young girl by Gary Puckett in the Union Gap? young girl get out of my mind my love for you is way out of line yeah he's saying it nobody cared nobody turned off the radio or wrote a letter and said what are you talking about you're a girl you're way out of line and you don't care yeah okay and and also Elvis was a gentleman I mean he didn't not do the nasty with with her all the time she was living in Graceland Yeah, her parents allowed her. But you see, she wasn't that area girl.

Her dad was, what, a colonel or something in the Army? Yeah, right. So I'm sure they thought it over very carefully. I know. The difference in the errors we live in. I mean, can you imagine today going to somebody, especially a colonel in the Army and saying, sir, you're a 14-year-old.

I'd like her to live with me. I'm a 25-year-old rock star, and I promise the best high schools, after-school activities. I mean, and the irony is that he really was. Yeah. He's like the only rock star in the world who would do that. Yeah. But that was also his sexual problems. He, I mean, I'm getting this from just everyone who's ever written about him or talked to him.

Maybe it's wrong. But, like, he was very into the, you know, Madonna whore complex. that people have, you know. Really? Well, I mean... I didn't know that. Well, in the sense that he didn't really want to have sex with her before they were married. They had sex. They were married on May 1, 1967.

Lisa Marie was born nine months to the day. February 1st, 1968. And apparently, you know, he didn't really... Wasn't interested in a lot of sex after that. Like, you were either a virgin. Oh, I see. Yeah. But, you know.

He missed out on a lot. I mean, you know. Well, he also got around. I mean, you know, Ann Margaret, didn't he have a thing with her? That's what they say. I don't know. Yeah, I think he, I mean. I don't always believe the press.

I don't either. You think they've been kind to you or under, what's your view on the press? On the press? Yeah, I mean, you think they've been decent? Well, it depends upon what we're talking about when we say press. It could be the yellow sheets, the nasties, you know. The tabloids. Yeah, yeah, the tabloids.

And quite often, they exaggerate, and in order to sell what they have, they say what they shouldn't say. Some things shouldn't be said. It's not, you know. they have not right they have they have no shame that's their brand no that's what they're selling making a living yeah we have no shame we will get a picture of the corpse yeah and you know and pay for it and and and and there's a look I've had people tell me show people who are like I can't believe you read the tabloids you know you're just I'm like fuck off you know what I will do whatever I want

to do that that's right lightens my load I find them funny I know what's bullshit in them. And also, by the way, they sometimes do uncover a kind of truth that other people don't or afraid to say. And sometimes they're very good to people. Yes, yep. I've been very lucky. But what could we possibly bad say about you? You have no scandals.

You don't know me very well. Well, here's the time to tell us the, no, I don't think you have any. deep dart secrets. I think you're, you know, and especially since you came up in an era where you could be, I'm sure, bitter about certainly the sexism. I mean, even in the 60s, the way, especially in show business, what people got away with, especially a hottie like you. I mean, they must have, everybody must have been taking their shot. And some, I'm sure, in a way that you could never get away with today. I did not have a problem.

Come on. No, I didn't. Nobody ever just took their pants off? Nope. Really? No. And I think a lot of that is because I was married to Michael. From what age?

Well, I mean, 21. Okay. We were married 15 years. Why, was he a tough guy who was going to... Michael was just big. You know? So that's... the secret have a big guy behind you yeah no did you ever see uh the the broken arrow

broken arrow he played cochise the chief oh he starred in it really yeah genie married cocheese five show business five five or something and 200 pounds and he lifted weights so you don't mess around with him that's your answer yeah that's your answer yeah but you've had what three marriages Yes. I don't count the middle one. I was going to say, with people of multi-marriages, do they have a favorite ex? I guess they do. It's just like people say, I don't have a favorite kid, but every parent always says on the down low, oh, yeah, I do. Yeah.

But you have a favorite ex? Like a Jane Fonda, I know. I know. It's Michael. Of course. Yeah. He was the father of my son. And the first? Yeah, yeah, he was. He was. There is something to the fact that the more times you, you know, sort of get seriously involved with someone, there has to be some inflation of the currency of that. I mean, not that I'm anyone to talk, I've never been married. But I could see how the kind of people, you know, the Christian types, like marry their high school.

sweetheart and um they've never been with anybody else i mean there is a certain thing that once you get once you think that you the person you're with i mean i thought of my high school girlfriend like this is it there could never be anybody better and like yeah once you get over that once there's a certain relativism to any other person who comes after that you can't deny psychologically so you know the more, the people who have eight, you know, the Elizabeth Taylor's and some of these people have had, they just, Jennifer Lopez, I think, now it's had five, five is it, or four? Yeah. It's like, why do you have to always get married?

Yeah. Are you married now? No. Oh, yes. You are? So the third one lasted. Wonderful guy. Oh, awesome.

We've been married 36 years now. Yeah. Well, he's obviously keeping you young. I mean, you really betray your age. I mean, it's amazing because I've talked to people your age and, I mean, and certainly people younger, and there's a certain, I don't know, halting this to it that you have none of. Thank you.

I mean, no one thinks you're 35, but, I mean, like, you're just... Why not? No, but you're just like, all I'm trying to do, I'm almost 70 is just be on TV generically late middle age. that's as good as you can get. You just don't want people turning on the TV and going, oh, who's that old guy? Just don't think about it at all.

I mean, you still have that quality era, which is pretty amazing. Like you could play somebody's mother who's middle age? Yep. Do you think they wouldn't want me? No, I think it's a great idea. Would you ever, like, do a series again?

Oh, sure. Really? Of course. I like to work. Yeah. It's my raison d'é, you know, it's why I'm here, I think, is to work. And I like people. I like going out and speaking and talking to them and have the Q&A.

And it's fun. Yeah. And there are so many interesting, wonderful people. Where? Really good people. Honestly, there are that you don't even know. until you're on stage and you're talking to them and they're remarkable.

Yeah. No, especially when they're your fans. Well, that's true. That's true. You tend to think they're geniuses. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, it's, you know, we like who likes us.

It's very natural. Yeah. You know, I mean, people would always say to me as a bachelor, you know, like a, what do you look for in a woman? I'm like, the ones who like me. that's a great starting you like me I like you

I think you have great taste yeah you like me let's start with that now we're halfway home don't you think that though you like

more than just a little circle of people oh of course yes yeah there there's something likeable about every single person you meet and um yeah i truly believe that i do too are you are you on social media at all i am you are

you are better than me well no i'm not i have someone who runs it for me okay but you have a presence i do um there's a facebook and yeah yeah i mean i'm not too aware of it either but i certainly get the gist that when people are online as opposed to in person they can be assholes in a way they can't i know they they bully yeah they make people kill themselves yeah yeah so and they actually especially the young people yes and they wish for it yeah if if you disagree with them they they're they're not above i want you dead yeah no yeah also they take advantage of the elderly Yes they do

And that's that's disgusting And we deserve those parking spots Yeah I like my parking spot You betcha It's Trixine Katte You're from the Bald and the Beautiful And we have to talk to you about Audible

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And we could all use a vacation. Apply now and get up to 60,000 points. So many points. For more info, visit bemo.com slash eclipse. Visit us today. Terms and conditions apply. No, they do. It's cruel.

I mean, obviously it's another form of people just will do anything for money. But they will run scams that really, prey on the fact that older people are not native to the internet or to computers or, you know, even when I was, you know, there was no computers when I was in grade school or college. Yeah. You know, so it will always be a little like doing everything left-handed to me, whereas kids, you know, they come out of the womb with the fucking phone in their hand. Oh gosh, yes.

You know. Wake up in the morning and they've got this. yeah yeah i wanted to say take that off stop that use your brain yeah you know start read a book oh dream on genie yeah that they are never they're not going to read a books are like they make jokes now about comedians do about like how ridiculous it would be to read a book like all these words you know it's just so scrolling is not reading and if you only have ever scrolled the idea of like page after page which is just tragic because you know you can get all the facts in the world but wisdom is in books someone was interviewing me

last week and asked me what are your hobbies and I said I don't have a hobby but I read. I love books. I like every kind of subject you want to put out there. I love history and I like murder mysteries. So you know you have both. And I was so grateful to my mother and my aunt for the minute I started in the first grade to learn how to read, they took me to the library and got me a card and they used to read to me. But I would get four books a week and read them during the week and then take them back. And I was lucky I had very young mom and dad, so they couldn't afford a babysitter.

So when they'd go out... Teenagers they were? Well, I think my mother was, yeah. That was what people did back then. Yeah, but they would go out and they'd take me and they'd sit me in a corner and I'd sit with my book and I enjoyed it. I'd read my book and they'd have their dinner

or have their drinks or whatever, you know, yeah. When did everyone catch on you were so hot? Hot? Yeah. I mean... You know what? I don't know because... Come on.

No, honestly. School? Come on. Uh-uh. I'll stop. I mean, you must have been like such a smoke show in high school. A smoke show? I like that.

You can have it. Okay, I want to be a smoke show. You are a smoke show. But it must have, I mean, come on. I don't. Well, you know, first of all, I knew what I wanted to do very young. I wanted to sing. I didn't have the money to have the lessons.

My mom and dad couldn't do it. So I got a job. So from day, I didn't spend a lot of time at high school. I worked in a bank for four hours a day, and I went to school, four hours. On the weekends, I studied at the Conservatory of Music, singing, voice, not anything else. I bet you at the bank there was a very long line for you. I know I was not at the bank. I was the one that sorted the checks out in Europe in an office.

Still a long line, but go ahead. Oh, crap. I don't know. Where am I? I don't know what I'm saying. You're in the bank. I'm in the bank. It's 1950.

Yeah, well, it was... But I think that's why I really didn't... I didn't have a big social life. Let's put it that way. Oh, okay. I have pictures of... I still have them, by the way, that I cut out of TV guide or wherever your picture would appear.

But you did have a midriff outfit, which was not seen anywhere. But they wouldn't show a naval. Really? Oh, you didn't know that? Well, I mean, I said, we're going back a minute. I haven't looked at the pictures of TV guide in a while. No, we made a big deal out of it, actually. I'm sure they did.

So the thing was cut right above your navel? Yeah. The outfit? Okay. And I never thought about it. I truly never thought about it. But I'm trying to think of his name he wrote for the Hollywood reporter. And he came down on the set one day.

And he said, where's your belly button I said don't you do you really care he said yeah yeah yeah show me I said a nickel a peek well I was very cheap so he kept coming down on the set

and talking and poking me in the belly button and writing about it and then the guys all across the United States started talking about my belly button. And, you know, I have often thought there were women actresses who were known for body parts, but they're glamorous body parts. I've got a belly button.

Yeah, I mean, yeah, I don't remember that there was none, but it was just, it was outrageous to some people. I'm sure there were places in the South that don't like. that were more conservative about racial and sexual things that was on TV that was accepted in New York or Chicago or Los Angeles. I mean, that happened in those days. Well, it's strange. When it got so knowable and kind of famous, the studio decided it had to be covered. They never worried about it before.

I'd put my arms up and, of course, it would peek out, you know. And the costume, now look, I had panty hose on, and I had panties, I had a bra. And those hammer pants. And they said I had to have something to, they changed it, yeah. Hammer pants, well before hammer. In between. Yeah, like with the big baloney, yeah. Yeah, what is this?

It was good. I mean, it worked. It would have been too much if you were also showing legs. It was right, because you had the midriff and the thing up here. It was all working for me. And the bottle was never allowed in the bedroom. The bottle was not. Oh, that's interesting.

Could never be in my master's bedroom. Master's cool, but not the bottle there. That's right. It was master. Oh, how times have changed. Yeah, it didn't. He wasn't really. He was like Elvis.

He could have and he didn't. Yeah, yeah. Men were more gentleman in those days. I mean, I thought that was part of the charm of it was that plainly he could have. I would have. Are you kidding? She wasn't real. She was to me.

She was an entity. Yeah, but in the, if you think of the text or the show, genies are not human. And she thought she was. And she thought she was, and he knew she wasn't. I don't remember that part of it. That may be, maybe I was too young for subtext. I just remember Major Healy. Oh, I loved him.

Loved him. Bill Daly. And he was on another show. He was funny, too. Yes. Like, back, I loved it the way back then, like, your favorite TV star, they put him on another show, you know. Yeah. It was.

Yeah, Bob Newhart. Bob Newhart, well, he was a creator. He was a good friend of Bob Newhart's. Yes, he was on that show. Yeah, right. Yeah, and they're both from Chicago. Okay. And they knew each other, you know, in Chicago.

The 60th anniversary of when Jeannie went on the air, is this? Yes. Wow, 60th. Yeah. Wow. So I must have been watching it in the womb. I wish I owned it. It's still on the air.

It's amazing. I mean, the longevity is truly impressive. I mean, some things just people don't want to let go of. I'm telling you. Do you know? I do get fan mail and I sign it and leave, send it back. But I have received fan mail from Moscow, from the People's Republic of China. Of course, Europe, UK, Germany, I expect that. But how they get those things out of those countries, I don't know. Everything is everywhere now, because the Internet, everything is everywhere.

No, but how do they get their fan mail to me in the mail? You know? It's actual snail mail. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, with a photo, and they want the end. One girl said that she sends hers to Poland, I believe. She has a girlfriend in Poland. So she sends it first to her, who sends it to me,

and then I send it back to, well, they put a self an envelope. I mean, I'm guessing in Russia and China, there are censors who see everything that comes to the United States, so I'm guessing that they look and they see one of the few things that they find non-threatening at all. Only guys, still like the genie. Well, put it in mail. It's fine.

But anyway, congratulations on that. Well, thank you. Thank you. You're great. But I, I, this is before I ever saw, a playboy, which I know you turned down, famously. Good for you. Well, not enough money, you know. Yeah. Yeah, I do.

I totally concur with that money. No shame in it. But yeah, if they weren't going to pay. When I started babysitting, there was one person who had, you know, the guy got Playboy. My father didn't. Yeah. No, we didn't have Playboy. My father, I think it was his 50th birthday,

and somebody is a gag gift, gave him a gag gift. I mean, it was, I don't know. I think to them it was a gag. To me, it was deadly serious. A poster of Sophia Lorenne coming out of the water. Oh, my. And the water is making her tits stand up and stand out. And I just waited like two months before they forgot about it.

And you pull it up, pull it out. It never went on the wall. As I'm saying, they just let, you know, it wasn't like my father was going to put it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I just waited until I thought they forgot about it, and then spirited it to my room. Yes. And put it in the back of my, I had a little closet. About this one, this at how much.

And I just put it on the wall with all my clothes, so I could just part my clothes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I even had it under. Your secret. I had it under another poster of Mr. Spock, in case my mother saw. saw that. I know. Always thinking. I was going to say a strange little

Machiavellian boy. No, you were a real boy. I was a real boy. I was. And I haven't changed a hell of a lot. That's my secret. None of you have. They're all little boys. Believe me. It's so true. Right? Yeah.

And men take an especially long time to mature to the degree that they even do, right? Wouldn't you agree with that? I just think it's great. I love that part about a man. I think men who are manly, you know, and suddenly you discover that they care

or they're crying in the movie. You'll see a tear come down on the show. I love it. Oh, nothing wet and sp candies like that. I appreciate it. Like the hot guy who plays against type or gets real sensitive. or, you know.

But don't ask Bob Conrad to do it. Don't? I'm just, remember him? Robert Cut. Oh, sure. I tell you, the male stars of the 60s and 70s, they were hot. Like, in a way, they forgot how to be. Robert Conrad, come on.

Tell me you didn't have a little crush on Robert Conrad in his various TV shows. Well, no, I didn't. I'm sorry. Really? I didn't. Why? I don't know.

I don't know. Did you know him? It's not my type. Not your type. Yeah. I wanted to be him. I wanted to be him. I wanted to be with you and be him. But who else?

They're like manic. You know, they were like manly. They were just more unabashedly manly. And I feel like one of the problems we have today, and the sexes are just moving. in opposite directions in every possible way. I mean, there's just a lot of hate for the other. There's in-cells.

Oh, yeah. Those are guys, you know, who that is, involuntarily celibate. They're guys who can't get laid, which, you know, no shame. I used to be an in-cell. We didn't have a name for it. And I didn't want to advertise that I can't get laid. Yeah. And when I join a club with other fucking losers who can't get laid,

I just, it was like you can't get laid. well, do something about it. You know, I masturbated and plotted how I could get better. Okay. And I don't do that today. They just hate on the way. They blame the women. Yeah. And the women are like, men are, forget it. There's a

whole movement now. You know, like just they're just irredeemable. You're not going to bring them along. And all of this plays right into the hands of the guys who least need to get laid. Because in a world where women are so

cynical about men that they think why even try, you might as well just fuck the cute guy. You might just fuck the fuck boy. So it just makes the problem worse. Yeah, I guess. I hadn't thought about it. Yeah. Well, I think it's really something that I want to throw in your lap, and I have a plan for you to go on OnlyFans. There's a question. You know how, oh, you could make a fortune on OnlyFans. I'll manage it. I'll manage it. I'll be the manager. I'll take a very reasonable 20%. Okay.

The colonel got 50. Come on. Yeah. But you know what? You know what? Only fans, right? You what? Only fans?

What that is? Are you my only fan? No, there's a whole organization, a whole website called OnlyFans. Oh, no. I don't know about that. No? Oh. No.

Sit down. Okay. No, even deeper. Sit even lower. Okay, okay. This is not going to come as good news. Okay, well, I mean, it's a website that advertises as a place where people can do anything, show you how to cook or write poetry.

It's women masturbating or showing their vaginas to men who are paying them electronically to watch them. And it's very, very popular, and millions of women. It's a big thing. Hasn't it always been that? No, not like this. I mean, there weren't millions of American women who, or go on Porn Hub. There's just an endless amount of women who are making porn videos. And they get paid for it?

Yes, not well. Except for at the very, at the high end of, at OnlyFans, they make millions a year. Do you have a bag over their head? No, but I bet you they've tried that. You could probably get away with it if you had a hot enough body. But no, I mean, it's, you know, it's just, it's, again, part of how sad this has become that there are men. I think the man part is certainly as sad that they think in some part of their brain that this is a real relationship. Right.

And very often the woman who they're texting with, you know, as they look at her. It's not really that woman. It's some fat guy in the Philippines. Right. Who's pretending that he's this woman who doesn't even speak English because she's in Czechoslovakia. And this guy is so pathetic that he thinks this is, you know, anyway. I hate to have been the one to have brought you that news. I will always remember it.

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physically present in Ontario. Eligibility restrictions apply. See Golden Nuggett Casino.com for details. So do you think women are more promiscuous now? When I was growing up, you could also get pregnant. You still can. Yeah, but there's medicine and there's a lot of stuff going on. But they had condoms back then, no?

Yeah. Did you carry one in your pocket all the time? Yeah, and sadly never used it. I may still have that too. No, I was, you know, terribly shy when I was... I was, too. Yeah. Well, but see, it wasn't an issue for you because people would approach you and want you and talk to you, whereas the guy, I was the one who had to initiate and I couldn't do it.

No, I was just working. I really didn't... From what age? I started at 14. Oh. But that was working on weekends in a department store. And then it switched over to the bank in the sophomore year. But was that normal to work at 14?

Sure, for sure. A lot of kids did. If it wasn't babysitting, it was doing something else. I'm working at a store. You know, you're right. I did yard work. That's what I did. I just didn't.

No, when I was 16, I got a job as a stock boy at the A&P. Yeah, yeah. That's right. You said people would come to me, not you. You'd have to be the... Yes, the instigator. Well, you would. You certainly would have to be, and I think it's normal, you know, to do that.

But it doesn't always happen that way. I was also singing in dance bands, but this is after I got out. I was giving you a history here. I was going to City College, and I was studying, still studying at the Conservatory. And my mother heard me singing. We used to do the dishes, and she'd sing with me, mostly Gilbert and Sullivan. But she heard me studying what I had to do for the weekend.

And she said, Barbara, you're singing every note perfectly. But you don't mean a word you're saying. And she was right. She said, I think you should study acting. and that's so then I had another thing to do at night so I didn't go out a lot and the oh I know I'd want to tell you this the acting teacher the woman who had this school

said you're too shy Barbara you can't you don't have to be the nice little girl the good little girl all the time and she also hit me on clothes because I wore mostly beige and black and, you know, and she said, get some color. Got color. And then every time there was an audition down in the theaters in San Francisco,

she said, go down and audition. You don't want the job. Just go and do it. Get used to it. And she was right. she was right it served me well who championed you in those early years was there somebody my mother your mother nobody in the business like there was nobody who was a mentor no like who were the big people who you looked up to like watching everybody at the time you mean before i came down to

yeah like who was on tv that you wanted to be oh well lucy lucy sure oh Yeah, there were a lot of women I really would like to have done, yeah. Like who else? There weren't that many women on TV. They were always the housewife in the sitcom. Like Mary Tyler Moore changed the game. Yeah, yeah. But.

I really, I wasn't, I was never trying to be a person, a certain person or a certain part. I just wanted to work in my craft, and I did all kinds of parts, all kinds of parts. But I wasn't thinking about being Lucy or, I mean, I loved her, and I loved being on the show. But I also loved doing the Andy Griffith show, and there are nothing but little old men on that show. But I had a wonderful time doing that part. If it's a well-written part and a well-directed part, there's nothing better for me. I feel so much better when it's like that.

Yeah, and you're also one of those people like the Fonz, you know, who does a part that's so iconic. Yeah. That, you know, it'll always be a great thing and also a thing that can be a drag because the audience is the audience, and you can't ever instruct them what to do or what to think or what to feel.

They just react, and that's all they should be doing. They're paying the money, and they're watching the TV, and buying the toothpaste. It's up, and it would be nice to be able to say to them, look, I'm not just genie, but to them, there's a certain percentage that, like, they can't forget that, it was just so big.

It's a victim of success in some ways. And like that's something that, you know, lots of sitcom actors really have had to fight again, typecasting and pigeonholing. Well, you know, after Jeannie, I dove in and did a lot of different things. Yeah, because she was a big star. And I didn't even think about her.

I didn't realize she's right there. Always right there. But I, Harper Valley PTA. Yeah, yeah. First it was a movie and then a TV series. First it was a song. Well, yeah. It's the Jeannie C. Riley, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. No, I love that. Oh, if people don't know the song, I got to look. But that wasn't Jeannie. No, no, no, I understand. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Oh, not at all.

I headlined in Vegas doing me, getting the old chords together. So I wasn't thinking or worrying about Jeannie at all. What was Vegas like then? It was... Like the 70s in Vegas? Uh-huh. Was that cool? At 80s?

Yeah. I mean, Sinatra was still playing Vegas then. Yeah, and Elvis was right down the street. Yeah, Elvis, of course. That was his era. Yeah. You went to see him there? I did.

The International? That's where he played. That's where Colonel... Parker, like, lost him in a gambling bet or something. So we had to play there, like a mule, like 2,000 shows of weird. God, he was exciting. And he got on that stage. Yeah.

He was just, first of all, when I work generally, especially in Vegas, I don't leave my bedroom. I do my show. I go back up because in Vegas, you get Vegas throat. You've heard about that. I used to open for musical acts in Vegas, and I remember them often getting Vegas throat, which would give me the night off, and I'd still get paid. So I loved Vegas Throat, well, I hated it.

Oh, I know. But what I did. Because it's so dry there. Well, I would go, I'd do a show, and I'd go up to the room. I had two shows a night, seven nights a week, is what we did. Right. And when I'd go to bed at night, I would have. One of those hot steamers, you know, the...

Of course. I had one on either side of the bed. Smart. And my hair would go curly. And I would not talk a lot. Smart. Really smart. I didn't go out...

Right. Out of that room, and it was really boring. It really was. Vegas is rough. It was. George Burns was the best. I worked with George. At what?

doing just doing it i i loved i loved working with him on stage and then he'd say to the the lady that was with me doing my hair he'd say come on girls let's go get some soup and at the first time he said that i thought i can't go get soup you know i can't go get soup and i but i went anyway because he was so darn cute why is soup bad for your throat i don't know i just didn't want to go down to the people Oh, I see. And for him, it was always, let's go get some soup. That was his thing. You're okay with soup?

But it was fun. It was fun going with him. And it took some of the stress off of my worrying about... What is this act you were doing with him? Well, he would open the show. And then he'd introduced me, but I'd come out and I'd do Gracie Allen, actually, with him on stage. Wow. Then he'd leave, and I would do my...

50 minutes of whatever I was doing, singing. So it was your show, but he was like the opening act? No, we split the bill. You split the bill? It was billed as Barber Eden, George Burns, in Los Vegas. No, it was George Burns, Barbarying. Okay, well, he was a million years old. He deserved it.

But, like, what hotel was this? Stardust or the Flamingo, Riviera. Yeah, no. The Sahara. It could have been the Riviera. The Platinum Lady. I think it was the Riviera, but I'm not sure. I played the Riviera in 1985.

I played all of them, actually, the MGM. I opened the MGM. Really? The MGM Grand? That was the last place I played. The last two years, I was staying there six times a year. Yeah. I couldn't take it anymore.

I mean, not just Vegas, but especially Vegas. I mean, there is just something about that town. that drains you. Like, you're there for a day and you feel like you've been there for a week. If you're working, it's strange you. Yeah. You can go and have a couple of days there.

It's fun. That's it. Yeah, but like just coming down from the elevator and a clang, clang, immediately assaulted with the lights and the clang, clang, and the, you know, it's just a bunch of stupid, like, horrible people walking around and T-shirts.

I didn't hear that. Well, I mean, it's just, I mean, it's, it's not the cream of the crop. It's just, you know, there was a time when a casino was, you know, James Bond walking in in a tuxedo, tuxedo. You get these, lucky if they wear a t-shirt tuxedo. You're right. You're right. I mean, they're like practically bare-chested in the lobby. Yeah.

And they come in from the pool or whatever. It's just, it's, it's- My mother loved it. It's dying, you know. She went with me. I was, I also worked with Shecky, Green. Oh, I remember Shecky Green. I love him. Was he nice? Oh, a beautiful guy. Really? I loved him, yeah. You were lucky. Everybody was nice to you. No, he was really nice. And my mom and I would come down after I did, because I opened for him. And I would come down. For Shecky? Yeah. Yeah. This was at the MGM Grand. Okay. And I, we'd come down and we put our or chairs right in the wings and watch him

because we didn't know what he was going to do. You never knew what Shecky was going to do on stage. Because he was such an improvisational. Yeah. That's awesome. And naughty. Yes. And my mother loved it.

You know. See, I didn't, I mean, you just, after all these years, changed my mind about Shecky Green, or as the kids call him, who? Yeah. Because I always thought he was. was kind of, I never saw him work that much. So I guess I kind of thought, maybe because the name, Shacky,

I thought, oh, this guy's probably corny. And now you're telling me he actually was kind of a genius. He really, he was great. I'll tell you one time that I was doing my show, and I thought, Gene, it really a good audience. I walked off and my conductor said, well, Barbara, you really killed him tonight. And I said, thank you. Thank you.

And I went upstairs to change my clothes, get my mom, we're going to sit in the wings. They're sitting in the wings. And Shecky is sweating and talking. And finally he comes walking off. He said, and cursing like mad. And we said, what's wrong? What's wrong? He said, how can I make people laugh with the dead guy in front?

Oh, actual dead guy? Oh, yeah. But he was good for your show. no oh but why did you do good if he couldn't see him oh you couldn't see i didn't know the audience but you said the audience was good i don't think the audience obviously they didn't give a shit they didn't know i don't think you know but he was there they covered him up with a tablecloth during shecky's performance no during mine they covered him with a tablecloth during your performance yeah but i didn't know it i didn't know this one of the only must have seen that

I don't know They got the wife out of there I heard afterwards You know what they did The Desert Inn has heart We got the wife out of there The guy we put a tablecloth The show must go on

I couldn't believe it Well the lights are so bright Especially if you're doing a single singing You know You don't see the audience down Especially near What? Go back to they put a tablecloth

Because I just Just cannot get paid. So you did your act with a guy with tablecloth over him who's dead? Yeah, but I didn't know it. What did you think they were doing it for? I couldn't see it. Oh. I couldn't see it.

Where was he sitting in the room? He was sitting right, well, if this is the end of the stage. Oh, so front. It's right there. Always the dead ones in front. Really? People die all the time in shows. I swear to God, it's always in the front row.

That's the old saying. I killed him. You know, I mean, wow. Yeah. Well, that's a great memory. I mean, how many people have that memory? How can I make them laugh with a dead guy out in front? I remember a couple of times doing a stand-up show

and somebody had to go for a medical, you know, reason. And then you have to find a way to recover from that and make the audience not be, you know, I remember it happened a few years ago and I remember thinking after the show, I'm glad this happened when I was in my 60s. I don't think I would have handled it nearly as well in my 30s. It takes a certain skill that a lifetime of performing will... Especially for you.

Well, yeah. Because you're doing a one person talk. And it's getting people to laugh, which they have to feel permission to do. So you have to kind of bring them slowly down to, you know, he's going to be fine, this just in it's just indigestion you know yeah now i don't know what i did but like like you you slowly get back to your show as if it you know it's just you know yeah yeah but i don't know

if i could have done the guy with the tablecloth i just feeling it was disgusting i mean why don't they just put a fork in them i mean literally i've heard the term and this would seem whew wow but speaking of dying in the show Vegas is dying i just i keep reading this I read that today. Yes. Isn't that sad? It is. Well, they overbuilt it, first of all.

Looks like a little city. They overbuilt it. We used to be able to just walk down one street, the strip. Like the Riviera was at this end, and Caesars was at this end. And MCM was the farthest out. Yeah, I think that came later. But when I first worked it in the 80s, I think the farthest thing was Caesar. I think Caesar's Palace was...

You ever worked the one of the... the top with the circle in it. The circle was... Yeah, I don't remember what it was called, but you had to go up to the top, and that's where the showroom was. Oh, no. And it was a circle. It would move...

You mean like in the round? Yeah, but, yeah. I've worked many in the round stages never liked them. Yeah. Half the audience is looking at your ass, the whole show. I've done a lot of that, too. Yeah, but I'm sure it works better for you than me. With a book show?

I did a theater in the show. But anytime you're in the round, the thing is moving, right? No. Oh, no? No. Oh, you never did where it's moving? No. Oh, well, that's what in the round is.

You're in the middle. It's a circle around you, and it's constantly rotating like you're a lazy Susan. Well, we used to call it in the round. I don't know. John Kenley, do you ever work for John Kenley? Well, if the audience is all around you, the thing has to move because you can't show your ass to one side the whole time. They are. So it just, you know, it's, it's just, it's, it's bad.

I would never do it again for any amount of money. But it's, it's a common thing to be, to work in the round like that, that people do it. And I guess some people like it. I've never been on one that was moved like that. Maybe for one number they moved it, but I've never really. I, uh, actually, I did, um, with John Rate. When I first, because I didn't sing for a long time in L.A. And this was my first singing, that John Rait, this beautiful voice.

I remember all the stars came to see John. They all came, especially opening night. And I was so frightened. I mean, so frightened. because all the, you know, the aisles would go down to this round stage. And if the lights went out, you couldn't get back, you know, back and forth. And I thought, I can't do this. I literally felt my heart something.

I can't do this. Then I figured, well, I have an understudy. She can do it. She can do it. I'll just say I'm sick. I had this all going through my brain. And then I heard the music, and I walked down and did it, thank God. See.

You know, but I've never done that terrified. But you did it. I mean, not to shit on the younger generations, but like the oldest generations have this idea. There's no business like show business. There's no business I know. They smile when they are low. And you just always go out there.

Yeah. I've never missed a show. except when they made me twice because I had COVID. And a couple of times I missed stand-up shows because the plane broke and I couldn't get there. But I've never, like, actually missed a show because, like, I felt shitty, right. And today, like, pop stars often cancel shows

just because they just feel shitty. I mean, I'm exhausted or I'm this or I got, you know. And they just, it's just like, no, I just can't. when a whole, like, gaggle of people have paid and gotten babysitters or whatever they had to do to get their ass out there, and then you just can't, I'm sorry, you know, call me what you want, oh, get off my lawn, fuck you. It's true. It's bullshit. I broke a rib once. Broke a rib and still performed?

Yeah. I was doing Woman of the Year, and this was at the theater near New York. of the name of it now. But I love doing that play. It was fabulous. But they turned the lights out, and I had to go down like

this to get to the aisle. It was going up to where I made a quick change. And my heel caught in something, and bang, I fell. I felt like a car had hit me. And I lay

there, and I could hear people say, where'd you go? where'd you go? And I was thinking, just stay here, Barbara, just stay here. But I got up and they caught me and took me into the room. I changed my clothes to the quick change. It wasn't so quick. And got up on the stage and started singing.

And I got a standing ovation for a rib. That's almost the exact plot of showgirls. Is it? You ever see showgirls? No. Oh, you have to. But ironically. Yeah.

You've heard of it. No. Oh, it came out in the 90s. It was supposed to be a big movie. I mean, they spent a lot of money on it. It's one of those movies that is so bad it doesn't know it's funny, except people have been knowing it's funny for 30 years. And they watch it for comedy, which it is.

Yeah. But it's only funny because you realize they were serious. Yeah. It's about a girl who goes to Vegas, to be a showgirl, to be a showgirl, to be a star and the ambition. And there's a scene where she's the understudy and the girl who she wants to take the place of, she pushes her down the stairs.

Oh, it's... Oh, my God. Yeah. It's truly funny. And it's Vegas in the 90s. You'll watch it with your husband. Do you do that? Do you like get into bed and watch something on streaming?

Yeah. Is that one of your... Well, we don't... We stay up. and we have a big screen, which we just got, and we love it. But we sit on the sofa and watch. You don't watch before bed? No.

We go to bed, he falls asleep, and I read. That's better. Better to read. See, I have to watch TV before I go to sleep. Well, I would probably do that, too, but the TV isn't in our bedroom. We can fix that. I know, but there's no room. We have the technology now. We can put it right at the end of the bed.

There's just something about, I mean, I am TV generation, you know, born in the mid-1950s. People just did not divorce or certainly no gay. That just didn't exist. Oh, well. I mean, there were people we all knew who were gay. Paul Lind. Did you ever work with Paul Lynn? Oh, sure.

Okay. Well, you knew he was gay, right? Remember, of course. the audience did not. No, they didn't. But, you know, my friends were gay. I had... Rock Hudson?

Yeah. Really? Yeah. Was he your friend? Well, I knew him. He wasn't a friend, but I knew him, yes. Nice, nice guy. Absolutely.

But I didn't think of it. Of course, I came from San Francisco. And I think that's... city is more, or was, more mixed, more mixed. We had all different colors in our school, and we didn't think anything of it. Yeah. I mean, San Francisco is more liberal, obviously. It became extremely liberal. But, you know, liberals back in that era had beliefs that would appall the woke people of today. I mean, remember the movie, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner? Yeah.

Great movie, right? Yeah. 1967, Spencer Tracy, Catherine Hepburn. Yeah. And the plot is the daughter brings home a beautiful black boyfriends at Niportier, who could resist him. And the couple is a liberal couple. But their objection is not, oh, you're marrying a black guy. Their objection is your life is going to be difficult.

Mm-hmm. And you're our daughter. And so that's what's making us hesitate. Well, if you try to do that today, they would just say, you're the most horrible people in the world. Because the... It isn't difficult anymore. The world has changed a lot.

Yes, it has. They really don't give enough quite credit to how... I mean, America has a lot of problems, but America can change and has and does. I mean, you can show belly buttons on TV now. You can show... No, we are very... We're very lucky in this country.

I mean, when I think that you couldn't show your belly button, And I, when I first time I went on the Tonight Show or one of my first times in the early 80s, and I said the word sucks, the airport sucks, and they got mad. Of course, Johnny was saying it next week because nobody gave a shit. Yeah, yeah. So, but, like, that's where, you couldn't say ass. Ass. You had to work around the word, and now, Comedy Central, which is, like, basic cable TV.

Yeah. Everything, it's just amazing. Which is overkill. Overkill, yes. It isn't necessary, you know, really. Right. Yeah. Well, it is for Dice Clay.

You talked about it. We had a little group of nuns visit us on the set. Nuns. Uh-huh. And I mean, really, nuns in the black things in the little hat. Because they were the flying nun, they'd gone to her set. The flying nun. And then they came.

and brought them down to ours. Were you on the same network as the Flying Nun? No, but we were shooting. You were NBC. We were at Columbia Studios. Okay. Shooting. It's movies, you know.

But Larry, dear Larry, you don't know you, Hagman. Larry Hagman, I do know him, or I did know him. He's a sweetheart. I loved him. But he's a little crazy. Yes, sure. Anyway, the little knowing munis came down. I took one look at them, or I took.

one look at Larry and I turned around and I went in my dressing room because I knew what he was going to do. He said every foul word he knew. And it was pretty good. Then he got the axe from the fire axe and then started throwing it like this on the ground and singing really nasty words. And Finally, the guys on the crew got the thing away from it because he could hit the coaxial cable and kill us all. So, but I was peeking, but I wasn't out there. It was, the upshot of it was, we never had any more guests on our, that was it. I remember when Sammy Davis was a guest. Oh, yeah.

Because Admiral Bellows? Yes. How come we remember that? Hayden Rourke. Hayden Rourke. Another one in a lot of shows, always played that officious kind of... Wonderful guy. Oh, good.

Yeah, wonderful. I hate to be so cynical that I didn't think Hayden Rourke was good. No, he was beautiful. But he wanted some entertainment, and Sammy Davis Jr. guested. Yeah. Right? Yeah. But Larry Hagman, he got a reputation as being a real eccentric, and he kind of was.

Well, he was. Yes, he didn't talk on Sunday. But he was a talented. Very talented. Yeah. Oh, and huge success with Dallas. Yes. He fucked that part in half.

But, like, he, I remember once he was giving me the recipe for what he eats in the morning, which is a pot muffin or brownie. You know, he was telling me how to, exactly how to make. And that's what he would do. Every morning is make a pot muff. He would make it? I think his wife. Well, whatever. Okay.

But anyway, it was made and eaten. And I was like, wow, this guy eats pot first thing every day and just stays high all day with that. That's kind of awesome. I couldn't do it myself. but I admired it, and he also didn't talk on Sundays. I know. But he wasn't like that when you know him, right? When he was...

Oh, yeah. He didn't talk on Sundays? Well, yeah, no, he wouldn't. He wouldn't. Because they told him he had to have therapy. And he did go to a therapist, who I think just made him worse. But he told him take a day when you don't talk, you don't do anything. so Larry didn't talk

but he got his guru clothes on robes flipping in the wind and would have a flag and he'd march down the beach in Malibu and everybody would march in back of him but he wouldn't talk but he got a lot of attention

have you ever been in therapy? No me neither no I mean, I'm sure it helps people. Oh, I know it does. But like what you just said, you think maybe it made it worse? Yeah.

You can also do that. I think you go to the wrong person, you're, you know. I mean, yeah, I guess that's what it is. Like a doctorate is good ones and bad ones. But it's just such a nebulous area of the human mind. Yeah. Like to pretend you know things, yes, maybe you do. You see different, you see lots of patients and you see

patterns in people's behavior. I think you people, therapists, can do that. But, you know, so many people have been in therapy for decades. It's a crutch for some. And you would think, if it, you know, doesn't something

either work or not, don't you have to give a certain time limit on, you know, but you seem extremely sane. Barbara even, extremely sane. I wouldn't say that. So many people have sat in that chair who are a fucking nut.

I'm just telling you, like, not in every way. Like, you'll be talking to them and blah, blah, blah, and everything seems normal. And then it'll be like, and then we fake the moon landing. And you're like, okay. And like, I'm telling you, a lot of people, especially people in show business, they just believe crazy things. And you don't seem crazy at all. And that's great to see. Well, I appreciate it.

You'll never know. Okay. Well, I can't tell you how much I loved you coming here. Well, thank you. You would do that for me. I enjoyed it. You've kind of fulfilled a lifelong dream. Thank you for having me.

Would you? I really enjoyed it. Would you sign my bottle? No. I certainly will. Okay. Thank you. Okay.

Let's close with the bottle. I'm going to try to get you one of our bottles. What do you mean? Oh, wow. That would be awesome. Yeah. There's a guy who makes him.