Club Random with Bill Maher - David Cross | Club Random with Bill Maher

Episode Date: April 27, 2026

Bill Maher sits down with David Cross and what starts as loose, slightly irreverent banter turns into one of those conversations where you realize—oh right, nobody actually agrees on anything anymore. Especially when it comes to “cancel culture.” Is it real? Is it exaggerated? Or is it just what we call it now when the crowd turns on you?David gets into the Netflix sketch that vanished, while Bill draws the line between being actually canceled and just not getting invited back—which, let’s be honest, are very different things. They get into comedy, where the line is (or isn’t), and why both sides seem to have lost their sense of humor.Along the way: Charlie Manson, Elvis, Brando, the grind of touring, getting older, and the brutal reality of knowing when it’s time to let a dog go. Try Claude for free at https://www.claude.ai/clubrandom Subscribe to the Club Random YouTube channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/c/clubrandompodcast?sub_confirmation=1⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Watch episodes ad-free – subscribe to Bill Maher’s Substack: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://billmaher.substack.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you listen: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/ClubRandom⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Club Random Merch: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://clubrandom.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices ABOUT CLUB RANDOM Bill Maher rewrites the rules of podcasting the way he did in television in this series of one on one, hour long conversations with a wide variety of unexpected guests in the undisclosed location called Club Random. There’s a whole big world out there that isn’t about politics and Bill and his guests—from Bill Burr and Jerry Seinfeld to Jordan Peterson, Quentin Tarantino and Neil DeGrasse Tyson—talk about all of it.  For advertising opportunities please email: [e-mail] ABOUT BILL MAHER Bill Maher was the host of “Politically Incorrect” (Comedy Central, ABC) from 1993-2002, and for the last fourteen years on HBO’s “Real Time,” Maher’s combination of unflinching honesty and big laughs have garnered him 40 Emmy nominations. Maher won his first Emmy in 2014 as executive producer for the HBO series, “VICE.” In October of 2008, this same combination was on display in Maher’s uproarious and unprecedented swipe at organized religion, “Religulous.” Maher has written five bestsellers: “True Story,” “Does Anybody Have a Problem with That? Politically Incorrect’s Greatest Hits,” “When You Ride Alone, You Ride with Bin Laden,” “New Rules: Polite Musings from a Timid Observer,” and most recently, “The New New Rules: A Funny Look at How Everybody But Me Has Their Head Up Their Ass.” FOLLOW CLUB RANDOM https://www.clubrandom.com https://www.facebook.com/Club-Random-101776489118185 https://twitter.com/clubrandom_ https://www.instagram.com/clubrandompodcast https://www.tiktok.com/@clubrandompodcast FOLLOW BILL MAHER https://www.billmaher.com https://twitter.com/billmaher https://www.instagram.com/billmaher Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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All merch is available exclusively at clubrandom.com. While you're there, catch up on recent episodes, and grab some swag and bring a little random home. Once again, that's clubrandom.com. You know, now on bringing up Chunky... Could you tell me the log line for bringing up Chunky? I'm curious. A snob. I didn't not see it for a reason.

I just didn't see it. I'm personally offended that you didn't see you. David. Hey, I let myself in. And I started without you. I hope that's okay. How are you, man? How are you, I rushed here.

I just couldn't bear to keep you waiting, but... How are you at him left? I literally was just... You didn't jog here from here. No, no. No, but I ran from my house. Please, take a seat. And I almost never do this on a Friday,

but I would not miss the opportunity. haven't seen you and how long has it been? I mean, I mean, it's got to be at least a decade that's not even... No, no. Like I say, last year. No, I... No, I've heard of... Oh, gosh, it was pre-COVID, that's for sure.

I did the show. I was out here. But that's a long time. My father-in-law was very excited to meet you. You got high with my father-in-law. Where was this at real time? Yeah, it was afterwards... Uh...

Also, there was like a... You did real time. Yeah. Right. And then we went out, my father-in-law is a huge fan of mine, so he came along. And I will... How do you get along with your father-in-law? Oh, really great.

And he's a legend, you know? He is? Oh, right. Yeah, yeah. And he's just... Right. His stories are insane and... Like what?

I mean, well, like the stories mostly of, in a kind of Forrest Gumpian way, like, you know, I was hanging down and then I gave Charlie Manson a hitchhiking. And then when I was, and then I had to go into the army and they had me teach Elvis Presley. I mean, just these crazy stories and, uh, um, yeah, I know people like that. That's funny. We're getting to that age. Yeah. Where you realize at a certain age, like, it's amazing the things you haven't done. Are you talking about me specifically?

No, no, no, I just in general, like, like almost anything somebody you can name, yeah, that happened to me. Mm-hmm. You know, like, like, you live long enough and you'll do everything. Yeah. And, and meet a lot of people. I mean, I already could, like, I mean, probably list 50 people who have been guests on either politically incorrect or real time who are now dead. Yeah, I'm not bragging, and I didn't kill them.

No, but I'm just saying as a marker. You're saying there's a connection there. I'm saying as a marker of time passing. Right, right. You know, I do remember when the first guess, we used to have a list of all the guests. Wouldn't it be great if I died right now? I just had a massive thing. Well, Dave, great for me, yes.

For the publicity, you not so much. You look like you're having a good life, so we don't want to cut that short. Yeah, no, no, I'm... I mean, you're wearing shorts, which... It's fucking, you know, 100, whatever, an 89 degrees out there, whatever. I mean, it could be 900 degrees. I wouldn't wear shorts, like at night to an interview. But that's me.

That is you. You're a different cat. I mean, I admire it in a way. It's like, I don't have that kind of confidence. I guess. You wouldn't want me to be uncomfortable. No, I love it for you. We're all different.

Also, I have to ask because I was wandering around. Yes. That is real? That's crazy. Three 9-11, sure. A guy with a towel on his head. Right. Jumping into the World Trade Center.

Well, World Trade Center as a sandcastle for people who are listening. Oh, yes. World Trade. They're at the beach. And as a kid. And a kid, but he's got his towel wrapped her in his head that makes it look like

Yasser Arafat. He's got sunglasses. Sunglasses and he's got a shovel in his hand and he's jumping forthrightly into the Twin Towers as a sandcastle. So it's a New Yorker recovery. You're from July 26, 1993. Wow. That's pretty, that's pretty wild.

I mean, liberals should never get full of themselves because you don't have to go that far back to find out when they were just absolutely not liberal. I did a whole thing on when Brando won the Oscar and he sent up the Indian girl. And most of Hollywood went apeshit about it. They didn't, you know, like, of course, John Wayne had to be literally restrained from punching her. But they booed. and it was just, you know, different. What do you mean? Like, you know, I also did a bit once about,

like, you don't have to go that far back to find movies, you know, in this century that are made by the most liberal people and it's just all white people in a way they would never do today. Right. Well, that's called progression and evolution. Yeah, well, sure. I mean, sometimes they take it too far and go over the top with wokeness, But yes, absolutely, progress, and nothing progressives hate more than admitting progress.

Well, what do you mean? Well, when you admit progress, you admit that there's not still work to be done. I mean, they... Well, those two things are mutually exclusive. You can make progress and still say, although hopefully not in a dickish way, that there's more work to be done. Absolutely. That is the correct, in my view. my, that is exactly my opinion, my view.

Right. That's not how they see it. They see it as, here's an opportunity for some people to come in second in a, I hate racism the most contest. It's not going to be me. Well, I think. It's a lot about, sometimes a lot about their feelings more than the issue itself and how it makes them feel it. Oh, for sure.

Okay, good. For sure. And I, but I think they're the, the, the, um, What I've experienced when I run up against people like that is the thing that they all share is kind of a lack of humor, sense of humor. I'm glad they're serious and I'm glad they're doing something that is helpful. but you know and we share this

personality trait it's you make a snarky comment that's funny and pointed and they don't think it's funny they don't and they're also like hey

you know that's not cool they're a parody of themselves they're an eye roll they're a cliche because yes are some things literally not funny, yes, but we draw the line at a very different place than they do. And also we draw the line

in a very different place than we used to, because we certainly used to be able to, and again, liberal people have done blackface, liberal people have, and nobody cared at the time, and it wasn't meant, it was always meant as a way to point about the evil of racism. It wasn't, It wasn't supporting it. But then things changed. And they decided, no, you can't even do it in support of the idea. And okay, I'm fine with that. I shouldn't like get to vote on what it is.

But it is a big change. And again, liberal people, you don't have to go that far back when we were all acting differently. And my thing is just like, if you did something that was like 20 years later, they go, oh, my God, how dare you? But at the time, no one else gave a shit. You know, you did the sketch, you did whatever, and there was no comment. Then you have to cancel everybody from 20 years ago

because everybody just let it happen. Well, it's interesting you say that because, you know, I have a real issue with the idea of, cancel culture the idea that that cancel culture has I think it's accorded more power than it really has and I think it's

and I say this as someone who literally because what you just mentioned literally did a sketch on the rebooted Mr. Show with Bob and David for Netflix Oh, I loved it. Thanks. So you guys did a... Do you know they took... So we did a sketch

where my character gets in blackface. And it was based on, inspired by those all those videos people started making of like you know, we're, I'm a sovereign citizen and I'm going to

test this thing out with the police and they would go film themselves and, you know, hassle a cop or something stupid. and black like me the book the famous book black like me was a famous book in 1959 was that Baldwin no no no it was a guy

oh I know what you're talking about yeah I haven't read it but he wanted to see what this is pre-civil rights error like when it was just sort of starting to bubble up you know he's I want to see what it's like and show people what it's like to walk through the world yeah with dark skin in America in 1950 you couldn't do it today, but it certainly was, you know, again, I don't know if sometimes their own worst enemy.

It's such a brilliant way to, and a necessary way to open people's eyes toward what we are trying to achieve. Well, I think that example is, that would be a shame if a person couldn't do that today. It's a genius thing to do. Oh, you couldn't. But to go. Go back to what I'm saying. And you don't need to, but yeah.

So in the sketch, I play this idiot character who's trying to call Know Your Rights, and he's one of these guys like, okay. So they put up a sign that says, you can't do this, but I'm a sovereign citizen and I have every right and I'm going to show you your rights, whatever. And he goes and Keegan Michael Key plays a cop and I'm trying to get him to, you, you know, arrest me or whatever and everything i do he's just like that's cool just you know take time go and yeah you know uh look out and do better next time and we'll we'll see you know and i keep upping the the bar so then i put i put blackface on um you know drive around and uh um

and then and i'm the idiot the character is the idiot per doing this and then he's still pretty cool, but then Jay Johnson playing a white cop comes out and just pepper sprays me and beats the shit out of me. And the point is made in several ways. Netflix didn't just take that sketch out. They took the entire episode off the air.

And that's being canceled. Yeah, that is canceled. Literally. I mean, people sometimes want to say cancel. People aren't canceled because they're still doing this or that, there are different gradations of it. There's soft canceling. I would say I've had some of that happen to me.

Like what? Soft cancelling would be like we will never give you an Emmy, even though plainly I deserve them. No, Bill. No? You don't think I've ever... I don't know. I don't know what the categories of the context or any of that.

You don't watch that shit? I don't... I really don't. And I don't, I haven't watched an award show in fucking forever. And they're all bullshit political garbage anyway. It's not fully, I'm just saying there are gradations of ways you can soft cancel or hard cancel is like, you may never show your face in this town again. We will never.

And usually that's, you know, for good reason. I mean, there's a good reason that, you know, a lot of the original ways. of me too guys. Matt Lauer sounds like he was a pig. Oh, yeah, yeah. You know, like Charlie Rose. You'll never see these people, you know, out to dinner even.

You can't even go to a restaurant when you're that canceled. But yeah, there's different, some people like Louis C.K. Can certainly play anywhere in the world and sell out big stadium, theaters, whatever. Auditoriums for his stand-up

but much harder to like get a studio to like do a movie you know yeah uh that's a kind of cancellation Woody Allen they work with him anymore even though I think that's a bogus charge I don't know I think we I just think we need a new term that's more that's not so uh definitive you know I mean but for you to say there's soft canceling and hard canceling to me that means we need some new language for it. Hit me. Go ahead. Give me a minute.

I'll text you when I'm... Fuck you up versus fuck you up badly. I mean, I don't know. When I'm on the plane. Do you remember the Mitch, speaking of this general subject, do you remember the Mr. show sketch, this is probably the first iteration of it, where it was like they were about slavers and the line was... Oh.

People selling. people to people. Right. Which is one of the most devastatingly funny lines. And again, I don't even know if, trust me, there are people in this world who will certainly

find something about that to object to. Oh, for sure. Yeah. I mean, that's going back to the idea that you know, people who don't really know me that well, who know little bits and pieces of my work here and there,

assume that I'm super lefty political comic and I'm not I'm not a political comic I'm a comic who talks about politics you know in part of a much bigger thing but I can't tell you how many times in you know as I was coming up doing stuff in Boston

Cambridge San Francisco I would get booed and hissed for you know the joke that And it's, it's, well, you did gay Jesus. Something like that is always going to, yeah, certain number of people do not want to hear Jesus talking like. Yeah, on both sides, both, you know, part of the spectrum. Well, Jesus, Jesus fan.

Yeah, and people who think that you're somehow denigrating gay people by doing that, you know. And, no, I would get hisses and booze, like, you know, at progress. you know, cities and places. That means you're doing something right. Yeah, no, I don't, I don't, I didn't go off crying. I'm just saying like,

it's not so cut and dry, you know? And I find that there's the, the, the thread through all that is people who, their sense of humor gets blocked by emotion, you know, and,

and, uh, correct. And it's, it's, it's, it's, a bummer, you know. And as someone from the South, I mean, where are you more comfortable real? I mean, I know that the cliche would be, well, in the South, they're going to be a bunch

of rednecks. Yeah, but in the South, they're also going to be, like, more, like, ready to laugh. Oh, I have some of my best shows in the South. I mean, regionally. As opposed to places where, I mean, I've had some great audiences in San Francisco, and I've had some of the political, though, you're two PCs. and I'm a bad man. Yeah. Yeah, I know. And, you know, so people used to ask me,

where do I like to play? I would always say the red states because I would attract a mostly liberal crowd in a red state. They're so fucking happy to see you. Here's what I experienced. And don't have a stick up there, basically. No, but there's a, there's a,

when I go to, you know, places, Even like Missoula, Montana, I was going to shoot my last special there, but then some stuff happened. But I was going to... You'll go anywhere. I'll go anywhere, yeah. I will absolutely go anywhere. I was like that. I just quit last year, but for 40 years I was pretty much like that.

You mean like your... Yeah, I stopped doing stand-up. Really? Yeah, I did my last special. It was on a year ago, taped December, 24. I was like, I'm out. Wait, wait, wait, I want to We'll get back to that, but I want to

What was that decision like for you? Tough, obviously. It's like cutting off your arm in a way. I mean, I've been doing this, there's nothing that's more consistent throughout my whole life from when I was 22 and got out of college and moved to New York and tried to be a comic hanging out

at Catch a Rising Star and the improv. So to not do it was felt just weird. Yeah, yeah. But, you know, first of all, I'm 70. I thought, oh, that's a good number to maybe go. First of all, it's not healthy.

You look great for 70, bud. Well, I'll finish your thought. But it's, thank you. It's not healthy travel in general. Oh, I know. It isn't. It's hard. It's really bad.

Planes are not healthy. Even private ones. I was very fortunate to travel like a pimp all over the country. But even still, And hotels got worse. Is there a dog sleeping somewhere? Do you hear that? There is a dog sleeping somewhere, but not anywhere near this.

What am I hearing? I don't know. The place is charming in a sort of down and dirty way, so it could be anything. Honestly, it sounds like there's a dog sleeping. There it is. It stopped. Oh, there it is. Okay, sorry, sorry.

Wow, you have a better hearing than I do. I well right but even if there was a dog's like me it would be kind of a soothing thing to hear I actually like it when I hear my dog snore yeah it's like he's happy he's content he's secure he feels good enough

to see just what kind of dog do you have at the time ancient I mean I've had two for a very long time one died in August how old oh just old as fuck and you know I mean just gets to that moment What are you on dogs? I do.

We're on our third dog. Third dog? Yeah. You've been married for how long? It'll be 14 years in October. Wow. This is my third dog, our family's second. But yeah, I talk about having to put my dog down a few specials ago.

And I waited too long, you know. And I knew it. I knew it. Too long? Yeah, to, I should have done it. She was in. Because she was so much pain. Oh, my God.

And she had to diaper and I had to carry her up and downstairs. Yeah, no, no. It is so hard to know when to have the death panel, as they used to say about Obamacare. It was going to be death panels. Remember that? Oh, yeah. But you do have to have the death panel because at some point, right, it's, it's, you're just

making this creature suffer. And it's inevitable. It's not like, you know, there are certain things where you just know it's only going to get worse. For example, in the middle of the night, if you feel like you have to go to the bathroom, like, do I really have to go? But you know, in your mind, it's not going to get better. In 20 minutes, I'm not going to have to go to the bathroom less.

Right. So I might as well on the first. Right. I'm going to go. Until you get to the point where you're so relaxed, you're like, you know what, I'll change the sheets. I'll move over there. I'll roll over. It's fine. I always thought, though, that somebody missed a good trick by not inventing something that was like, okay, bear with me, like a receptacle that you put on the floor by the bed, right?

Yeah. And it has some sort of tube coming out of it, and that you could just lie in bed and put your dick in the tube. That has to exist. Have you ever seen it? Um, no, because I'm not that lazy. Uh, but I, I mean, I'm sure somewhere. I don't, I don't think so. Let's check Amazon.

Check it. What would you Google? What would you, what did you say? Pist Tube. I don't know what the fuck it is. Then you're going to get some punk band from, uh, from the early 80s. Um, I've never seen anybody talk about it. I've never certainly seen one.

I've never seen one advertised. I feel like I, those kind of, commercials that are on TV all the time for all sorts of crazy shit like that. Dude, I started doing this bit, which is a real thing that I experienced about, like, where I'm watching TV, I'm kind of mindlessly watching, and it suddenly dawns on me that every commercial is for old people who can't, who have to go to the bathroom in a different way. And, like, what I? Everything.

Because the only people watching TV are people who have to worry about going to the bathroom when you least expected. Or are you tired of falling down in the shower or things like you can't get into the shower properly? See, this is when I hope they do the death panel for me. I mean, when it gets to the point where it's bathroom issues, again. Well, it sounds like you're almost there. No, no, no. You're asking for a tube. First of all, I wouldn't use this.

You would totally would. You would totally use it. Yeah, maybe I would. I mean, think about it. You don't have to get up to go to the bathroom. You just stick your dick in the tube. I like it. I mean, you know.

Can I tell you what I've started to do? Cut to billionaires. Maure and Crosby after their massive invention revolutionizes sleeping. So Shark Tank, let's do it. Let's go on Shark Tank. Yeah. Well, somebody's going to see it and steal it now. But they would have stolen it anyway,

because that's the nature of American capitalism. There you go. You cannot... Hey, the best things were stolen, right? Everything, but... The light bulb? The TV. Everything.

Everything. It was all stolen. Fritos. Fritos. Fritos? A guy... Oh, the bandito? Yes. For the bandito was...

You said stolen. Oh. The... that's not fair to say stolen but the guy was given the guy's like hey I'll give you five bucks for that whatever it was the Frito way Frito and then

so I shouldn't say stolen that's not it but the light bulb and TV yeah but it's terrible because if you are a person with no means but you do come up with a great idea the second you let that idea out

big companies will find a way to steal it and then you sue them or whatever and they have a trillion dollar lawyer fund that can just wear you down and yeah so it's it's a little like how third parties in this country never succeed because once you get popular enough your ideas get stolen by one of the other two parties that's what always happens they call and they know how to figure out how to cut your support just enough to, you know, help the other guy. They've been really good at that. But it is amazing, though, how we do get locked into just like Coke or Pepsi.

You've got to make, I mean, this, I could, I don't want to, go into, if I did want to, like, long lists from both sides of things I hate. But you still got a choice. You're always having to make the choice between what do you just hate less? Mm-hmm. You know? And it seems theoretically, if there were more choices, you wouldn't, but I don't know if that's true either. I mean, European countries, parliamentary systems, they always have more than two parties.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, well, most places, I would imagine. You think that's better? Absolutely. Yeah, because it's, well, it's more for the people. because you have representation and, you know, but then you end up like,

that's between you and I. You like the people. Well, you know. The people. You say it like it's a good thing. Well, in theory. The people. On paper.

Have you met the people? I have. Seriously? I have. Come on. No. You can usually tell when something's overhyped. There's a lot of noise, big promises,

and then reality shows. shows up and quietly disagrees. But not with Claude. Claude is the AI for minds that don't stop at good enough. It's the collaborator that understands your entire workflow and thinks with you. Whether you're debugging code at midnight or strategizing your next business move, Claude extends your thinking to tackle the problems that matter. Teams are using it to dig through complex problems, real ones, not the kind you solve

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That's it. That's it. It's coalition forming. And, you know, there's... Right. Now, what happened in England, I was living in the UK. when the liberal Democrats did surprisingly well. And it was, who was it?

I think it was pre-Camaran. It was, oh, it's how David Cameron got. So the Tories, labor, and liberal Democrats. We've had a lot of different faces, Teresa May and Boris Johnson, and a lot of faces in that office. Well, Teresa May was like 100 years. five days, something like that. Who?

Oh, no, no, it was a... Sunak, right? Ritchie Sunak, wasn't it? Yes, she's... He's gone. And now it's... Well, he was the mayor. No, no, he was prime minister. No.

Yeah, absolutely. Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah, you're right. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, yeah. He was post... There was a moment... Yes. Sunak was replaced by Starmor.

Yeah. Yeah. There was a moment when... England had a prime minister who was the sign of an immigrant family from India, right? And I think Scotland had one whose family came from Pakistan. I mean, you know, talk about progress. Like, yeah, just acknowledge it. That, you know, we're not complaining about that.

We're just saying things have come a long way. Well, I feel like they're going backwards because our system now wants them to go backwards. Like we have people who are openly espousing, you know, white Christian nationalism, and that's, you know, women, people openly say women shouldn't vote, you know. Yes. That's home. That's okay. No, but. No, there's very frightening things on the right. Yeah, and that's because progress was made.

Yes, some of it is backlash stuff. But in general, what you see out of a Republican today, like just the garden variety, even the MAGA people, I mean, I certainly met all of them. I mean, the vice president is married to Indian American. Yeah, it's. You know, they're just things, and they are not, Trump doesn't care about gay.

No, not at all. You know, so there has been like progress that seeps into even the, you know. Yeah, but that's, yes, but that's. So there are backlash people, but like the rank and file Republican is, I don't think is a racist. I think you can get them into positions that look racist, but I don't think in their bones, they're like what, what the race is kind of what I grew up with, like a racist. was somebody who didn't want to shake a black person's hand. Yes.

We have, we, I don't think that's a thing. And, but I think there is, I mean, I know there is because they say as much. There's a feeling, a sense that, I mean, like Charlie Kirk stuff, that, that women and black people and black women especially are just not, I'm not being an asshole guys. I'm just saying they don't have the mental, you know. There was a little more, I read the, when he died, they, you know, of course, lots of places put his greatest hits, a worst hit. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then somebody else printed something, and this is what always happens with the media, like I never trust it because you never get the whole story, where like each one was put in with the full context. it was never quite as bad, as they said. My context is everything, right? It is. I'm just saying it was easy to pull from his quote bed and find stuff that I certainly don't agree with,

even in the context, but it wasn't quite what, it wasn't just, it wasn't quite what you were saying there. That was a dog sleeping. Dying. Dying. But, you know, again, I'm the guy who made religiousists. You don't have to tell me, about fucking how religion warps people's thinking.

And, you know, all these guys who are on this, shall we say, turning the clock back page, it all comes from religion. It all comes from super duper Christianity. And the Bible says that man has dominion over women. Oh, maybe that's animals. It's dominion of animals, but sort of of a woman too. But it does say that. I mean, it doesn't say dominion, but it says that.

Very close. It's right. That's what I'm saying. It says that a woman, it implies that a woman should be subservient to the husband. I can accept it in women, but not animals. When will the animals rise up? Come on. Well, apparently they're sleeping. They're not even going to wake up. But yeah, I mean, a lot of it does come from, I mean, you see it in the military. I mean, Pete Higgsett is really super duper Christy as all dry. drunks are. Interesting.

You know? Yeah, yeah. And I'm not even saying that he is what they say. I don't believe anybody. What about the, the, he just said something. It was almost like a Freudian slip.

Not Freudian slip, but a, he, fuck, I don't know, I shouldn't say anything. Yeah, I know what you're getting at. You know, it's like the Trump administration, are not people who care about saying the quiet part out loud. Right. In fact, it's their superpower in some ways.

It's like that's what makes MAGA fans go, finally, somebody said it, somebody's got the balls. Yeah. And sometimes it's not wrong. And so, you know, I mean. What has Trump been right on? Well, I think he was right to attack Iran. Oh, I highly disagree. Yeah, I know.

I figured you were. Why? Because I think. I do think of you as like sort of that like down the line liberal, like down the line. I mean, in some ways I'm definitely, I mean, I'm politically more Democrat socialist. I believe. You're socialist. Again, I think you're plainly then you're the left of me if you even say you're a socialist.

Well, I said democratic socialist. I know, but I know a democratic socialist is that's Mandami. who's a straight up communist. No, he's not. Okay, he has someone working. Bill. Could I? Yeah, all right.

He is, first of all. Okay. He has someone working for him named Cia Weaver. Okay. Have you read about her? I have not. See, that means you're in a bubble. Okay.

Because you should have. Okay, so I will so edify me. She's like one of his top lieutenants. She's had a, his big issue was, the rents too hard. She's the head of like we're gonna fix housing. This is like what got him elected. He is not disavowed her and I could show you all her tweets that she's put out over the last few years in quotes.

And one of them is elect more communist. I don't think you have to read between the lines if somebody he stands with and by is saying, and also her other quotes are like, all homeownership is racist. Well, that's ridiculous. Exactly. Yeah.

Yes, I have an issue with that thing that she said. I don't know this woman. I will definitely look her up. I'm a fan of Mom Donnie's. I'm a fan of, yeah. And I'm, I've lived in New York for 25 years. Still smoke pot? No, I mean, I wish.

It just doesn't, I'm not good with it, and it took me fucking forever to. learn my lesson, you know? I wish I could because I enjoyed it. Did we used to? I feel like I've smoked part with you. No, I did. I just don't, my brain doesn't work well on it. You know what I mean? Well, sure. You just said you like Mandami. Well, let's not argue about...

For me, it's not an argument. It's a conversation. I don't feel like it's an argument. And I think he also going from the last the administrations that were in that ran New York from when I moved there I mean they weren't you know Bloomberg was okay in a relative sense but but I mean de Blasio and Adams were just not good de Blasio was kind of feckless and Adams was absolutely corrupt blatantly. And I think at the least,

and I think most of most New Yorkers feel this way, like let's give this guy a chance. I agree with that. Okay, totally. I'm not judging him by what he's done because it's too early in him. We don't know what he's going to do, and he could wind up being an effective administration.

I think he's going to be like LaGuardia. I really do. I think he could wind up being an effective administrator, but his philosophical pinnings, and I could read other things from the Democratic Socialist Party that show that it's not different than communism a lot of it. It is, I mean, it's like, that's just not. It's about, they have statements about like, the government should take over industries and so forth.

Like, I mean, I don't, I don't believe that. And I'm not a communist. But they do. But that's part of, when I hear social, democratic socialist, I'm telling you, you can read up on those. Sure. I mean, the people I'm fans of politically call themselves democratic socialist, align with that. Bernie Sanders, AC. Bernie is not a communist.

No, he's a democratic socialist. Right. That's true. And there's that wing. And I've spent, you know, over the years, a bunch of time in Scandinavia and, you know, those countries that are democratic socialist. And they're fucking awesome. Now, I don't live there, and I would imagine that I would miss certain things. But, I mean, when you look at the list of, and they just came out with the, you know, the 20-25 list, the happy.

places on earth. And it's always the same. It's always the same thing. And one of the outstanding things about all those countries, whether it's, you know, Denmark or Finland or whatever, is the, one is freedom and the other is lack of suspicion in their neighbors, I guess, or people in their, you know, community, small and large. Yeah, I totally agree. I did a whole editorial once on the idea that that kind of European socialism was made people happier for this reason that happiness is not just what you have,

which is what we think in America. It's what you don't have to worry about, what you don't have to sweat. And they don't sweat health care. They don't sweat college. They don't sweat being taken care of. Daycare. Daycare, yeah. Things like that.

They have more vacation days. Yes, yes, that too. They are happier. That is probably what makes them happier. And that is just not so far the American character, which is, no, you know what, I'm going to give up those things for the chance to, if I do hit it big, I want all. I mean, we're greedy people. Absolutely. And we also are ambitious, the good and the bad and the American character.

but, you know, a friend of mine who came here from Canada said, in my country, we cut down the tall trees. Here you don't. And that's certainly also what I've heard from people I know who came from France. What does that mean? I don't understand. You can't get too high. You can't, you know, you can't, you're not, you know, we have trillionaires. I was taking it literally, and I was like, oh, I don't know, that's my hang up.

I take shit way too literally. It's like, oh, it's a metaphor. That makes sense. Yeah. Sorry. We good now? Yeah, it's an issue I have. Can I ask a more basic question about this?

I mean, this idea, I read this survey every year also. It's, of course, when you do a lot of shows, you know, your comedy writers are always looking for something to write about. Certainly the comedy writers would wish we cover this more. I tend to, like, ignore it because I feel like it's a good. bit of a bullshit thing. Maybe they are happier, but how do you, how can you really quantify who's happy and how happy they are? You just did and you were right to do so. That is what it is. You answered your own question. Yeah, you're right. And I've been there. I've, you know, every time. But that doesn't, but that. I don't live there, but I'll be there for. It's right for

those people, but it doesn't, that doesn't make everybody happy. Some people are riverboat gamblers and are willing to forego those things and the we're all in it together thing because they want it all. You know, Glenn Beck once said, somebody's talking about, you know, how we divide the pie. And he said, it was talking about talking the quiet part out loud,

I want all my pie. People want all the pie, David. I'm not disappointed. with anything you're saying that's I agree with you who's agreeing with me that it probably is better I think you're agreeing with me when we have right down with not sweating it is a great goal and a great good but you know it is somewhat at variance with the other thing which is ultimate freedom I mean Americans we love our freedom yeah but we're not that free I mean we're not that free we're not right and

Certainly, there's nothing more freeing than money. I know I've been poor and I've been rich and it's so much better. Absolutely. Absolutely. When I was poor, I didn't even have the freedom to eat the food I want. That's a basic freedom. And I don't think people think of it in those terms. Yeah, no, you're right. Is that tequila? No, that is tequila. Would you like some?

Yeah. There you go. I like a big boy. Would you like No Okay Well it's great to see you Oh you too It's really

I can't stand it That the years go by And they don't see the people I'd like to see more And we got to come to New York We all have such Is that where you live now in New York? Yeah I've been there for quite a while

But it was London Because I remember trying so hard Yeah I started this to get you Calling you all the time And it was like He's in London He can't do it

Yeah I did So you were there because you were doing that show? Yeah. I remember that. I love that show. Oh, thanks. Yeah, I did three seasons of Todd Margaret, and then I did one. Todd Margaret.

Yeah, the increasingly poor decision of Todd Margaret. The increasingly poor decision, yes. And it's, yeah, that was a treat. And then I did a show for Sky after that called Bliss. Where did you live in? You were right in London? Yeah, I mean, I started, I was hitting every single place. That must be awesome.

No, but you're living. Yeah, yeah. I loved it. And I'm... And Amber liked it? Yeah, yeah. And we go back, we took our daughter there last year. When I was on tour, when I was doing the European leg, I carved out a week around London during her spring break or whatever.

You tour Europe. Yeah. I did it once. Oh, it's great. Yeah. I mean, I really... I look forward to it. I always...

What cities? Because you can't play Paris. No, I never played Paris. I play like all over the UK and Ireland. Right. Scotland? Scotland, yeah. In Amsterdam, of course.

Amsterdam, yeah. Berlin? I did Berlin for the first time last... And the Scandinavian country, because they all speak English, perfect. Yeah, and one of the best shows, I mean, they were all good, but I'd say the three best shows were... Cologne, Cone, Germany. Germany.

It's fucking great. I like crazy good. And Copenhagen. You expected to be a bunch of Nazis? You say it like, Germany, who'd have thought they'd laugh? No, no. I say that because my past experience with Amsterdam and Scandinavian cities in particular is you'll go up and you're, you know, doing an hour and 15, whatever, and it's just like people are sitting there.

And you know, you have those interior monologues when you're doing your set that you've done a hundred times. And you kind of walk away and, you know, have a whole conversation with yourself. And you're like, what the fuck, man? This is going to be tough. It's, I mean, they're not awful, but they're just not doing anything, whatever. And you think it sucks. And you, by the time you get, you're like, okay, well, that's it. thank you, and then people fucking leap to their feet, and they're cheering and getting a standing

ovation. I'm like, what the fuck? So that was an experience I had a couple times in those places. So when I did Copenhagen, they were like really active and great. It was great. And then Bristol, England was also one of the best shows I did. But it was, yeah, I tour Europe every time I go out. It's fun. And I, I, you know, they're, they're happy to see me. How many dates do you do a year? How many, like, stand-up dates anywhere in the world. When I tour, it'll be two years in between tours, right? So you don't do it continually.

You just do a tour. What do you mean? Look, I was never, like, I never had a tour. I just always did it. Like every other weekend, I'd go out and do Saturday and Sunday in two different cities. and play? Were you saying you have a real tour? Yeah.

What I do is... For how many months? I mean, over... It depends. Like, I would say I do between 80 and 110 shows. Whoa. Now, not all back to back. Right.

But what I do is I... But like you're away from home for like a month? Like a rock band? Oh, yeah. Oh, wow. You're much more of a warrior than I am. But, you know, it's fucking hard, man. The travel is just...

That's what we were saying before. It's brutal and it's... It's brutal and... And they don't... The people who route these tours, like, I go back and forth and back and forth. Like, guys, I... How am I going to get from Sioux Falls to Bozeman, Montana? I looked.

You know how I get there? I got to take a 6 a.m. flight to... You know, you get the... these regional airports and like, I'm not gonna do that. You can't take a plane? Well, you know, you take a plane. You know, your own plane. I don't have that kind of money.

I don't know, I can't take the tour bus. Doesn't the tour pay for it? No. I mean, the shows that the money that's making from the tour? Because like, I do. Really? Yeah. I'm thinking of these venues.

You're David Cross. I mean, some are theaters and some are like music venues, clubs where I have like standing room and no, I cannot take a, I can't even take a tour bus anymore. Wow. They're just too expensive. But also part of it is that I don't, if I went out for four months, which I used to, then I could take a tour bus because it all amortizes.

But I go back because I got a kid. A bus? Who do you need on a bus? Well, you have a driver who's driving you and you can sleep. I know what, you need a whole bus? Well, you're right. I only need half a bus, but they don't make those. So just you alone on a bus? Oh, your family?

You bring the family on the bus? Yeah, when my daughter, before my daughter went to school, but she's in school, and I don't want to be away for that. So I go back and forth and I'll do 10, 12 days, and then I come back for a week. You know, any kid, that I can't take a bus on it because it just two... What do your kids think of what you do for a living? One daughter is nine. She hasn't really seen stand-up and probably won't for a while.

It's kind of saucy. But when she was younger, she knew, as she put it, like, Daddy's silly for a living. He's silly. That's how he makes his money being silly. But now she's seen a little bit more. And I was just in a play in New York. I did Tartouf. with Matthew Broderick.

Oh, yeah, I read about that in the paper. It was great. And she came and saw that, and it would just, she, like, you know, jumped up. And she's at that, and I put her to bed that night. She goes, Dad, is it okay to be proud of you? Oh. Oh, I know, my heart. Really?

Yeah, yeah. I was like, yeah, honey, I'm proud of you, and you can be proud of me. And she loved it. And it was a crazy costume weight. I would say you made that up, but it's just too on the money. No, no, she said it. No, I'm sure she did. Yeah, as I was putting her to bed.

Well, I'd like to say that it makes me wish I had kids, but still nothing. I mean, it's a cute story, but certainly it wouldn't be worth changing a thousand. One cute story. I got 99. Wouldn't be worth changing a thousand diapers for it, trust me. But, okay, so I did read about this in the New York Times, but you'll forgive me, I don't live in New York, and I'm not much of a culture vulture. So, Tartouf, okay, doing a play with Matthew Broderick, that's as high up as you can get in the theater world. Matthew Broderick is...

Well, probably Nathan Lane, but don't tell Matthew that. Oh, well, they did the producers together. I mean, but Matthew Broderick is show business royalty on Broadway. So that's a very feathery cap thing for you. It was great. And what is Tartouf? Obviously, a French play. Moliere.

Moliere. Do you know Moliere? I know what he said. He said, to honor all men is to honor none. Well, that makes sense. His plays are great and really still relevant. Is he the bourgeois Jean-Tiom? The bourgeois gentleman?

No. He did. Mrs. Malabro? This is Malaprop. This is where we get Malapropism. From Moliere. Well, from, don't hold me to that,

but some French play like probably Moliere and Mrs. Malaprop. I think it's the rivals. That's where we get the term malaprope. Because she was always getting the words wrong. That was the gag in the play. He did the Misanthrope and the... Oh, the Misanthrop.

Yeah, and the doctor and the physician inspired himself for the invalid. So what's this one about, Tartouf? It's so fucking relevant. And it was a kind of modernized version. I mean, the setting wasn't modern, but the language was more, there's a lot of fuck you and stuff and things like that.

But so it's about a guy, you know, rich father who has this, you know, a lot of land, and that's who I played, Oregon. And Tartouf is this, clearly blatantly bullshit guy who claims to be, you know, religious, close to God. And he basically warms his way into the house. And I end up, an organ ends up like making him his air. And he divides the house and everyone in the house.

His wife, his kids, the, you know, cleaning lady, they're all like, he's a fucking, he's lying to you. He clearly isn't, and he tries to seduce the wife and in a, probably the most, the, you know, most popular scene and Oregon's hiding,

but he, Oregon won't hear it until it's like right in front of him. And even then he finds ways to make himself, you know, like, well, I wasn't that fooled, you know. And this is relevant because you're saying the metaphor is that we are the,

idiot who's being fooled? Yes. Well, I'm not being fooled. You're not. Who's tartuff in this analogy? If the American public is the idiot, rich truck.

I would say it's it's, you know, the Republican Party. I would say in, in, it's a person who's misrepresenting themselves

who's saying the things that this person wants to hear to get the money to and eventually he fools or gone into uh tricks him and they giving him his house and everything in it yeah i don't know if you've been following this psychodrama i have going with trump but he was hey congratulations by the way thank you that's fucking awesome the mark twine thank you that's great one another yes i appreciate you know thank you i mean It's, I mean, I guess it was you or Carrotop, right? And they went with, that's what I heard. That's what is out there on the streets, Bill.

He should get one. I love him. But after. To give every man a Mark Twain prize. It's to give no man a Mark Twain prize. But, you know, after the, he went sort of like tweet nuts on Valentine's Day. And then I answered back. And the end of my thing, when I was talking to him, I said there was a Democratic senator, John Ossov, who said about the Republican Party currently, you are the elites you pretend to hate.

Yeah. And if the Democrats ever learn to weaponize that message, they're so bad at messaging it, they're so feckless and useless. Did you get to see the special that were? I'm not yet. Because they just told me about it yesterday. Oh, okay. So. Work week, I couldn't have me.

But I've seen all your specials. I love, anytime you do stand up, I'm there. Well, did you see Worst Daddy in the World? Because the end of that is, I think, something you would. Do I remember titles? No. Okay. I think the end is something you'd really appreciate.

I'm sure I saw it. You know, comedy specials. It's not like, you know, you remember the title or, you know, I know, I know. Or, you know, it's amazing what goes in and then through, you know, I mean. Why did I, why did I bring this up? It was, it was relevant. We're about elites and the Republicans, and you're right. Oh, yeah, yeah, because I talk about how useless the Democrats are.

But I see, I feel like they're much more than just useless. I think they have a bunch of really stupid bad ideas also. Yes, I agree. Okay, that's great. I'm glad we agree on that. But I never stopped hammering the Republicans. And, you know, it's just... I think, well, they're more blatantly hypocritical to me, more openly hypocritical in the sense that of what you just said were, you know, they're the elites they pretend to hate.

And you look at video of... What's his name? John Kennedy, Louisiana. He had him on the show three weeks ago. Like, you look at old video when he's in Harvard. He's kind of talking normally, and then all of a sudden he gets and he's out. Well, geez, that's hotter in the biscuit, no. No, he definitely plays up Louisiana. No, I love him.

We had a great time because you could just see. I got to say, those kind of guys, the Republicans, they just have this little, like, I can wink at them. And it's like, yeah, we know we're full of shit about certain things. You know, now, the best of them do draw the line. It's not like the Republicans never draw the line. When Trump insisted in 2020 that he had won that election, which I was way out ahead on, excuse me, predicting that he would never leave office and then he tried to do exactly what I said he was going to do,

there were Republicans, like his own attest. Attorney General, who is William Barr, who we all didn't have very good things to say about him, and Mitch McConnell and Mitt Romney and several others, Liz Cheney, there were ones who, and ones also some who were closer to Trump who said, no, you lost. You lost, and you have to say you lost. So, you know. Well, the bar is set so low. Solo.

But yes. Romney was. decent about all of it. So was Liz Cheney. And Mitch McConnell, but even Mitch McConnell. And they got Adam, Adam Kinsinger, you know? I mean, right. But there were some other ones I'm trying to, Mike Pence, Mike Pence, did the right thing at the last moment. You know, so, I mean, you've got to hang your hat on that a little because that half of the country is not going away. Oh, it's not half. It's not half. I don't think it's 40%. He has, he has, Trump's approval rating now is 41%, which is low.

But it is like 100 million people. And he has 100% approval from MAGA Republicans, which is most of them. Well, yeah, that's not going to change. That's not going to change. I mean, in that tartuffian way, you can show, you can say, look, here's a, I mean, it's. How was Matthew Broderick to work with? He's a total trumper. No, he's awesome.

Matthew's great. The whole cast was great. We were, I've never done to play before. This is the first time I'd done that. Really? Yeah, and I knew early on that I was lucky in that everyone was super cool and liked each other and got along. And you can imagine you've been on sets before where it just takes one fucking asshole to sour everything, you know, to put a weird mood, you know. Boy, you are.

Yeah, yeah. We all have, you know. You've been around somebody who's just shitty or sour, whatever. And I could tell, like, if you're doing a play, because that's intense. And they're theater actors. There must be a good number of them are just fucking duchess, you know, pretentious or whatever, or complaining about things or have their process, and you can't, you know, and, you know, a person like me comes into it and just taking the piss. everything and it was everyone was super cool and we had a great time sometimes people have a real

prejudice about comedians oh yeah in acting roles i remember on my first sitcom i over what was it sarah on nbcc starring gina davis i didn't know what was it uh we were four lawyers in san francisco um there was jean davis you say that like that that's the way you had to deliver lines no no I was the Ted Baxter part. I was the office creep, which was awesome because the other three people, you could exchange their lines for each other. They were just three nice people, Alfred Woodard, my still wonderful friend Alphrey Woodard, you know, and Brunson Pinchot.

So there was the titular, white girl, the black girl, and the gay guy, and then the office creep. Yeah. I was in big heaven. I was 28. It was on a sitcom. suddenly my salary in life. And multi-camera?

Sitcom. You've done Sydney. Yeah, yeah, okay. Not like arrested development. Right, that's what I meant. Like, easiest job in the world. Right. It's insane.

People don't know. Gentlemen's hours. Come in on Monday. You read it around the table. Go home. Tuesday. We'll put it on its feet. You know, it's a sitcom.

There's only three sets. There's only so much you can do. The director says, while you're doing it, pick up the spatula. Great, you save the show. You have one hard day and it's not even that hard. Thursday. The day before the, when you're blocking everything, it's like 12 hours.

Right, right, right. It's boring because they've got to get the camera moves. That's it. Right, and then you shoot it in the day. First, without an audience, get it in the can. All right, I'm going to let the audience put their own can joke in there. And then at night you shoot it with the audience. They always use the audience version anyway.

You're saying you fuck them in the ass? I was hoping you would say it. Oh, okay. I just did. Happy birthday. Oh, great. Your nine-year-old will see this and now I'm the bad guy. No.

But yes, wonderful gentlemen's hours. And you were... I was the office creep. But was there somebody on the set who was like, oh, God, here we go. Yes, oh, that was the story. I literally overheard one of the professional actors, the one who was playing the secretary out front,

say, can you believe it? They've hired a comedian. Fuck, damn. It's infuriating. That, and it's attendant with the idea when people are like, wow, Robin Williams was really good in that thing. Or Jim Carrey was really, I mean, I believed him. It was really set.

Like, yeah, why wouldn't it? comedian of all people. Especially since the big line is always dying is hard or comedy is whatever. Dying is easy comedy is hard. Like they always say comedy's harder to do than drama, right? Yeah.

Like anyone who can pull off he's just a little kid! You know, anybody can be mad. Wait, who are we talking about? What's who's the kid? What happened? What happened to him? See how much I... I fucking, you pulled me in. I pulled you in with my head. And the Yeah.

And the potty goes to. But comedy is very delicate and... I've been looking Bob Oinkirk. I mean, one of the funniest smartest guys. You're a partner. Yeah, and... You guys are still close, right? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I just saw him yesterday. Okay, good. Yeah, we actually, we have a documentary that'll be coming out. We climbed, we took the Inca Trail to Machia. to Machu Picchu. It's great that you both did great, because it would have been awkward. What?

You know, it would be like if Matt Damon and Ben Affleck, if one of them was, you know, now on bringing up Chunky and the other one was a huge star, just made a big AI deal. Could you tell me the log line for bringing up Chunky? I'm curious because it's going to be stolen. But tell me about the log line. What's the log line for bringing up Chunky? Well, I mean, Chunky's a fat kid who, you know, we're setting this in the 80s when it was okay to say fat kid. Yeah.

And it was okay to be a fat kid. And they're just bringing him up. Who's they? The parents. Who are the parents? Can you cast this for me? Let me. Can I step in?

Yeah, please. So the parents are in their 80s and Chunky is 50. No, no, no. The 1980s. So wait, it's Doris Roberts. Right. Maybe not. It is amazing when I did, I mean, Sarah was on in 1984 or 85.

It was supposed to be a big show because it was on NBC when they ruled the roost. It was on between after family ties. That was a huge show. And it was the same producer, Gary Goldberg. Was it just one year? It just lasted 13 episodes because, the head of the network. Well, they hired a comedian to be one of the lawyers.

That wasn't the problem. The producer, who was very powerful, Gary Goldberg, and the head of the network, Brandon Tardikoff, remember that name? Like, had a shouting, shoving match during one of the tapings. So I think we knew, yeah. Wow. Yeah, and got to that level. You know, it was like that.

It's amazing how quaint we think of life in that era, because we did have this change in the show. about six or seven episodes in, they decided we needed an authority figure. And then suddenly we had this boss, like the head of the home office who came there to San Francisco where the four lawyers were in there. You would think that would have made itself apparent during their, when they were developing the idea. But it fucked it up, I think.

It was much better when we were just four Nudniks playing in the... the sandbox. Now we did have an authority film. I mean, I'm not going to blame the guy, but it was like the way they used to, the networks used to micromanage, shall we shit. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Much more than they do. And most of that is from my

network. HBO were the ones who pioneered that idea of, no, no, you know, we're just going to let you have enough rope to hang yourself or be a big success. We got two notes in four years. Right. on Mr. Show, too, that we had to take.

Like, we got other notes, and then we were like, oh, well, we thought this and this and this, and they're like, okay. And they encouraged us when we started. They were like, we don't, I'm paraphrasing it, but Chris Albrecht and Carolyn Strauss said, we don't want you to be like everything else on TV. We want you to go ahead.

We're trying to, you know, make a distinction here. HBO, it's not television. Yeah. It was great. That was their little motto, and I always still try to live up to it. I took it seriously. I take it seriously. I mean, they've only ever given me one note.

Bill, you know the way you always are? Don't be that way. I didn't have that work out. Could you be less Bill Marish? Well, I'm sure actors get to that point in life sometimes where they see I've heard this story, they will see in a casting call a so-and-so type, and it's them.

Yeah. And it's like, could I get this? Yeah, no. I am act that. Yeah. No, because you think that means they're over the hill? Yeah, they're not.

They're not over the hill, but just like a caricature, a reference point. Man. I don't even know what, I mean, if they said like a Bill Maher type, I can kind of get it. If they said a David Cross type, I'd be like, I don't know what you mean. No.

But you do play the idiot well because it is the funnest thing to do. I mean, that's what I was, the office creep. Yeah. You know, I did not know when I was being a macho idiot. You know, it's fun, man. Yeah, I was doing Ted Baxter from Mary Tyler Moore. And nobody knows because the impression is just bad. So it doesn't, so they don't even see that you're just lifting.

really from somebody. But you've also got, you know, intuitive timing and nature and you know how to deliver a line. But it's a... Acting is a rough game. I'm glad I got out of that one too. Because, I mean, first of all,

comedy acting, okay, that can last a longer time. But if you're in the leading man, leading lady area, it's a pretty short window. Yeah. Where, you know, and that's assuming you hit it in your, like, 20s. What if you only, sometimes it takes you to your late 30s? Sure. Okay, now you're, yeah, but I mean, like, I think Sharon Stone wasn't, like, known until she was, like, 35.

Okay, now the window where they're going to look at you as the leading lady, you know, the hottie, is like, now you got, like, 10 years left. Yeah. Well, unless you show your bush, then you get an extra three years. That's what, that was a, yeah. That was in the contract. That was the first one. That's what made her a star. You're welcome.

Remember that movie? Never saw it. You never saw basic instinct? I did not see it. What a dick. Now, come on. What a fucking snob. What a fucking dick.

I didn't not see it for a reason. I just didn't see it. I'm personally offended that you didn't see it. It's not, I never. You're snob. I'm not a snob. You're too good to see basic instinct. I mean, yes, but that is nothing to do with the reason I didn't see it.

I'm sorry, it's not tartouve. Oh, God. Oh, my world. There's a lot of stuff I haven't seen. Never saw Game of Thrones. Never saw, I watched three seasons of Sopranos. and didn't pick it back up. I never saw...

I mean, there's so much stuff I haven't seen yet, you know? Breaking Bad. Oh, every episode I saw that. Never saw that one. Really? Yeah. Oh, it's fucking great, dude. Oh, I'm the dick now.

Well, I never... No, I've heard that. It's great. I mean, it's... I think I'm saving it. For when? Didn't you just celebrate your 70th birthday? Oh, so what?

I'm going to die. tomorrow? I can't save anything. It's kidding. Oh, yeah, that's right, Dave. Oh, my God. I hit 70. I better watch Breaking Bad tonight. I mean, I got to... Well, you can't watch it all tonight.

I got to get through another episode. It's been great to see you, but I'm saying the window is closing. Oh. It was on for what? Six years, seven years? AI is going to keep me alive forever. So just suck on that. You're going to have to deal with me.

How is it going to... Forever. How is it going to keep you? You don't think AI is going to figure out mortality? I don't. Okay, we're talking about AI now, right? Yeah. Okay, it's going to do a lot of bad things.

Andy Innswis, right? What? Andy Inchwich? The guy from the... No, no, no. The periodontist? No, no. Artificial intelligence.

Yeah, Andy Inchins. He's a robot that does... Where are you on? on AI? Are you pro worried, con? I mean, all of it, really. All three of those things. I had an

experience where I'd read a lot about AI and I'd seen like deep fakes and stuff like that but... Sure. But when I saw that what's her name, Tilly, the actress? Tilly Norwood. Tilly Norwood.

Yeah. I was talking about my wife about this because she hadn't seen it. I was like, it was such a, as an adult, I don't even know if I've had this experience as an adult where this, it's almost like a grand magic trick, but I know it's a magic trick, but I'm watching Tilly Norwood, that video they made, I'm like, it's not computing. How is this fake? I mean, I'd never seen anything remotely like that, where this is as real as anything. If you showed me that,

and I didn't know what AI was, I'd be like, no, what are you talking about? It's me, it's computer genera. And then, I mean, it's crazy to me. I met her at the Vanity Fair Oscar party. I think we had chemistry. I do. That's the future of AI.

A bunch of old guys going, you know, I met her, and I think she likes me. How long is it? Did you ever see the original Westworld, the movie, Westworld? I didn't, but I know I'm familiar with it. Yule Brunner and... Right. Yeah, yeah.

My boy, James Browling. You know what? I know it because... I have so many of these movies. I know it because of Mad Magazine's... Oh. I have some Mad Magazine covers in this film? Yeah, I saw it.

But that's how I knew Westworld and kind of the plot and all that. Right. I mean, HBO redid it in a whole different way. But the original movie in the 70s, James Brolin, awesome, and Yule Brenner, awesome. And it's just this place where you can go,

and they have, you know, they're robots, but you're in the old West. So you can shoot the robot and you're not really killing anybody. Right. And you can fuck the horse. Yeah.

I mean, fucking horses is... Hors, I say. Hors. A horse. A horse. It's Western. Yeah. And... There's a lot of horse fucking.

back then. If you really have this, you know, I mean in the movie, the plot is that one of the robots played by Yule Brunner, of course, goes, you know, there's something wrong with the wiring and then he actually violates what they're told at the beginning is that the robots could never hurt you. And of course, Yulbrenner is shooting up the town. It's Asimovs. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

But in real life, I don't know if that would be the problem. The problem would be like if you could actually have guys who could, you could, you know, fuck whores or women who just would, you know, these robotic, a lot of guys would be doing that. Oh, fuck yeah. I think there would be a mass leaving of their wives. Yeah. And I agree. And besides that problem, which is a huge problem, it's also probably not great for the psyche of the species that guys think they can be as Andrew Tateish as they want.

Yeah, I agree. Even if they're robotic women. Yeah. I mean, it's just, that's the, one of the bad sides of AI. And that's coming. Do you think, I'm just thinking this now, I don't know whether I agree with it or not, but it's an argument that might be made that, well, if you have an AI version of a woman that an intertate type, you know, misogynist.

Right. can do that to, are they getting it out of their system? And that's a place for them to take those feelings. I think they're normalizing it and making it routine. Yeah, you're right. I can imagine the argument being made. Andrew Tate communicates with a lot of young men. And if they're talking about real women,

the way he talks about real women. Did you see the Louis Thoreau thing? Can you imagine what I, you're like the eighth person who told me I got to see this yesterday and I'm going to. Right, the manosphere. Yeah, you're not, it's not going to be revelatory, but it is. Right, it's eye opening. Yeah. I'm sure it is.

But, I mean, if they, if you get these guys, the Andrew Tate people, to be talking about actual women this way, can you imagine how they would feel about the robots? Yeah. I mean, yeah. I'm the opposite. I'm afraid of the robot, so I'm super polite. I mean, I didn't used to be. Like, when I have in my car, like, a plug-in for, like, a phone where you can, like, play music off of it, you know, just quickly an iPod. So when I get out of the car, when I've had that on, the car always says, says, I mean, not a sentence I used to say when I was 25 years old, but the car says to me,

you left your phone in the car. And I used to go, shut the fuck up, you stupid cunt, because we're just an opportunity to let out steam about, you know, mechanical things. I don't do that anymore. I'm not calling my car a cunt. I don't know who's... We've all seen Knight Rider.

You know. They're all in cahoots. The car, and it's like that old Woody Allen bit about... I think my appliance is in cahoots against me. The toaster made a remark. I think it's anti-Semitic. You know what? We don't have in New York, speaking of living in a bubble, which I admit, and I want to be in that bubble.

I pay for it. And I want my daughter to be in that bubble. It's a good bubble. Okay. I don't think any bubble is good, but... No, no, no. It's pretty good. When you're talking about day-to-day life, it's actually...

It's actually really pretty great. Well, you don't want to mix with people who you don't agree with. No, I didn't say that. Oh, I thought that's what a bubble was. No, no. It's a bubble is protection from the shit that's going on outside of the bubble that I don't, the awfulness. And there's no shit inside the bubble. I mean, there's some shit, but less and it's different.

No, no, I'm happy to be in New York. I you know and again I travel all over America. Well, you can live in New York and not be in a bubble. Well, yes, but I'm, I'll define it. The bubble is not for me or my wife, it's for a daughter. Yeah. And the more I can keep her from the things that I and my wife think are bad. Just to play devil's odd, I'd begin, about what might be in the bubble that isn't favorable to you.

A Democratic congressman, I've had him on the show like him a lot, Seth Moulton from Massachusetts. He got a lot of attention at the end of the last election cycle because he was talking about the Democrats and they got their ass kicked and the election and so forth. And he said, they were talking about the transition. And he said, look, I don't want my 12-year-old daughter to be on the soccer field and be run over by someone who's identifying as a man, as a woman, but is really a boy. I know what my daughter being runoff.

And a lot of people applauded him for that. I mean, we saw in the Olympics a, okay, born a man, now fighting as a woman, boxer, just beat the dog shit out of the woman, the other boxer. A lot of people were disturbed by that. It's very disturbing to watch because it's a man beating the shit. shit out of a woman.

I'm just saying there's stuff inside the bubble that could be bad too. Okay, well, what I would say to that, because I don't, first of all, if you're talking about a 12-year-old, that's- You want your daughter run over. No, that's pre-pubescent. And that, that, you know, a boy who identifies as a girl and, and. and, you know, for all intensive purposes, is a girl, is not going to, you know, have the, if you're talking about, like, late teens, like after puberty,

that's... I think 12 was when he was talking about. Yeah, that's prepubescent, right? I know, but... So there's no... The difference between a boy and a girl is minimal at pre-pubescent. And, and, and, it's true. I think you could find some.

Physically, physically. Oh, I don't think physically. Look it up, Bill. Look up. You're talking about. First of all, I remember being 12. There's some big 12-year-old boys. There's some big 12-year-old girls.

There are. Why can't you just say it's true? I mean, again, this is what's wrong with that, with the loony left. You know, like they just will, they just die on hills that are unnecessary. necessary to die on. I mean, 12-year-old boys, you know, I get what this guy was saying. And again, he's

a Democrat. Well, I would say the same thing to him. I don't give a shit, whether he's Democrat or Republican or libertarian or independent or whatever the fuck. The idea of 12-year-old... Okay, what about the other one? Olympics. I don't know the boxing story

or situation. Didn't get in the bubble. Yeah, that's fine. But now you can edify me. You can tell me. So was this, so it was a, it was a man, when did they transition? Did they take puberty, walkers and all that?

It's a little murky. If you read it up on it, it would be like they have their side of the story about why technically, you know what, I can't recreate it. To a lot of people that just came off as somebody who looked like a dude, punched like a dude beating up a woman. There may be a technical reason why this was a little different. Again, I don't know. But there is physical differences between a person's body once testosterone kicks in, right?

There's testosterone is what, you know, puberty. So I don't know if there's a bigger, just bigger, muscle mass and just bigger. If they have testosterone and they haven't. Even before that. No. No. No.

No. That's not true. The disparity between of, and there are bigger kids and they're bigger boys and they're also bigger girls. I've seen girls, you know, pre, no, trans not being a thing. I've seen girls kick the shit out of boys. It's about the individual person. right? Is it not? Do you remember third grade? I do. Third grade, I remember it, but I also remember that he said 12.

And 12 is, I mean, first or six? 12, I think kids reach puberty a lot earlier than they used to. I'm not sure why that is, but I've read articles about that that they don't know. Maybe it's that we give them too much meat or something's in the meat or I don't. They have lots of theories about it. What they see, you know, what could be psychological because they see so many. things, images that we didn't when we were kids? You think so?

I think it's certainly possible. It certainly has to be one of the... It would probably be more about like shit and our food. You don't think something that enters your mind? No, but it's not a ridiculous premise. I didn't say it was. No, no, I'm not saying you did. I'm just saying it's not...

I'm not saying you said I didn't. All right, right. People selling people to people. That's what I'm saying. No. I don't, so you're, I don't want to put words in your mouth, but are you, where do you stand on trans? At the reasonable place where, of course, it's a real thing, and of course they should be protected and respected, but there is a default setting for humans. I don't think where America is now, we're an outlier country, we don't do.

anything like the only people in the world who do this anymore, and I'm talking about not notifying parents in some places, letting kids self-diagnose at early ages, and then doing actual surgery, puberty, block, things that are absolutely irreversible. That's just something only the- Are puberty blockers irreversible? Absolutely.

That's something only the Democratic Party believes in anymore. I believe for, you know, just- Just the idea of puberty blockers, of anything. Look, my health always comes first. The idea of like... This is the tequila, right? Yes. I'm not trying to be funny.

Boy, if he's going to start on this, I'm going to need another drink. But the idea of reversing anything in my body or blocking anything, I'm old enough to know now. I've learned through different things. Like, a lot of health comes down to, like, keeping all the pipes, clear in every way. When things are blocked or reversed or you use any kind of drug that has, maybe

has a beneficial effect, but it also is going to block something or have some side effect that reverses how your body naturally wants to work, it's always going to be a problem. That's why I recommend my piss tube. You merely

lie in bed and put your dick in it. You don't have to get up. At this point, we're probably getting fairly close to being able to look at examples of adults that had, you know, puberty blockers when they were younger, right? And find out if medically, you know, in the same way, like 30 years ago, people said, oh, two gay dads is going to ruin it. That's not completely true, because not everything. No, I guess I'm saying we've probably getting close to. whoever the first kids were that had that becoming nuts.

Yeah, but I know you're saying that. And what I'm saying is you can't really say what the effect is 30 years later because you don't know when somebody gets cancer. Nobody says to you, except if it's lung cancer, did you smoke? Yeah, there's an obvious one. Other than that, it's just we don't know why you got it.

And they don't know why. Something went wrong in the body. and what caused that? What were the factors? So you're saying you don't know. What we're saying we don't know? We don't know. Could having puberty blockers 30 years ago be part of that, what your body was doing to compensate for that?

I mean, I had like acutane acne medicine in the 90s. Could that, if I got cancer tomorrow, would that possibly be a factor from? Yes, possibly. So it sounds like you're just making my. point because if it if a puberty blocker is just like acutane or not good cereal it's ever gonna be a good okay so we're gonna get rid of acutane are we gonna get because it might no no but be bad well you certainly should give the patient the information to say here's what here's what we don't have the information though

oh well that's even worse I mean but we don't have the information for a lot of things but but generally what I do know we may not have a specific information is that when you do something like block what your body's natural hormones are raging to do, that just intuitively tells me not a great health result in the future. You really don't see it that way? Well, I'll go back to what I said. We should be approaching the time when we can really look at this and get more of a definitive answer, whether it doesn't. affect people because I know trans. And in the meantime, just keep doing it.

I'm 100% pro science to help people. I do not have an issue with trans kids. I know a couple of them. They're awesome. And I think their lives would be absolutely miserable if they weren't allowed to live the life they're living. Yeah, sometimes. Sometimes I would agree that that is the case. I mean, that is literally, you know, for, uh, sometimes that's a case. And there's also many cases of people who regret it.

What's the percentage? I don't think it's that big. It's not in the bubble, but it's there. Tell me. Tell me. You're out of the bubble. I don't, I am. I don't know. Is it above seven percent? Oh, I don't know. I don't know. Well, you don't know then. I do know because I've read so many. I don't know what the percentage is, okay, but I've certainly read many, many accounts of people who have said this. I don't know what the... You can imagine that there would be nobody who did it and didn't regret it? I didn't say that. Okay, well, then there are people who regret tattoos?

So you're saying there's a certain percentage that it's worth it to sacrifice them. If it's 10% of people who regret it and they'll never have an orgasm again and now they're a gay man without a dick, that's okay. because I'm just asking. That's kind of what you're saying. It is what I'm saying, I guess. If nine out of ten people are happy, then yeah. I mean, you're putting that decision in the hands of children often who are confused about everything. So the idea that they could self-diagnose, the idea that I could tell you anything about my own life when I was nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, all these ages.

I mean, I was just. I was just hanging on. I knew I was not. Okay. I knew I was not. All right. I certainly was not thinking about men when I was masturbating. Okay.

So that's a solid thing you knew when you were... It was solid from morning till night. I was not thinking about men. I was thinking about, I don't know, Goldie Hawn and Diane Carroll and Ann Margaret and Raquel Welch. You know, I... Did you have brothers and sisters? I have a sister. Yeah.

Why is that relevant? I'm just curious. Your family upbringing. You? I have two younger sisters. Oh. And... That must be proud of you.

My sister's very proud of me. I'm very close with the middle sister. I'm the oldest. And nothing against the younger sister. No. I've talked about her in this. Just we're from different worlds. We live in different worlds.

Yes. She's very... That happens. Yeah. My sister and I live in different worlds, but, you know, still love each other. She older? She's older. It's so interesting to, you know, when you get to this age and you see the things that you knew about somebody from as far back as, you know,

know, 60 years ago, and you just see, oh, that was always there and that's always going to be there. Yeah. Like, I wish somebody had told me that, you know, about myself, just about like, you know, stop making this New Year's resolution. You're just always going to be this way about this. Bring it up chunky. Stop banging your head against the wall. Just accept yourself, you know? Yeah, that was, that was.

Honestly, my favorite episode of bringing up Chunky. It was a very special episode. All right. Well, I have to pee, and I did not bring my Piss Tube. Why? You could have plugged it. And tell me the name of it again. I mean, Piss Tube is just the first thought that came to my head.

But I'm sure there's something better than that. I think you go, Bill Mars, Piss Tube. and then your face is on there, right? But if I call it Bill Mars Piss Tube, isn't that kind of a flex? In the Pist Tube community? Yeah, I just think the kids are going to be like, you know, he's so full of himself, inventing the Piss Tube. No, but like if it worked in bed, again, longer podcasts, you know, just right there.

Yeah, we'll do what the T-shirts do. Get a fucking crystal springs water bottle and pissing that. The Amazon warehouse. Dude, you know how many bottles of piss? I see the plastic bottles I see, like, after there's been a shoot somewhere in New York. Really? Oh, yeah. It's a teamster thing.

Just piss in the bottle. Yeah. Yes. I thought that was apple juice. That was the big laugh on bringing up Chucky. Yes. Oh, no, that was part of the very special episode. That was the, because it was a two-parter.

Should we plug anything? Can we plug anything for you? A bit late. Everybody's tuned out. No, no, turned out. No, all right, yes. I got a new special, the end of the beginning of the end. The end of the beginning of the end.

Okay. And it was... What does that mean? You tell me? I know what it means. The end of the beginning of the end. end. It reminds me of the Churchill quote about World War II. They had won a, I forget it was a big battle, maybe El Alamein. And he said, this isn't the beginning of the end, but it may be the end of the beginning. Oh, interesting. Meaning the war. Yeah, that's kind of what was the thought behind it. We had a beginning of the end. And this is the end of the beginning of the end. So you're not anti-Churchel.

No. What? Well, sometimes you bubble dwelling liberals are like Churchill's the bad guy now. I want to talk further about all this stuff. Come back. All right, I will. I'll do this with you anytime. Do you go to New York ever?

Well, I mean, I used to all the time because work took me to the East Coast. And now that I don't do stand up, I mean, I had a book out in 2024, so I did press there in New York. I mean, look, I have so many roots. there, my sister's in New Jersey. I live there, man. I live there twice. I never liked it. No, I'm not in New York.

Yeah, I understand. I get that. I love the sunshine and not living in a building. But I understand the great things about it. I will get there. I'll call you when I do. Please do, yeah. I know people who live there now, and I know what's better about it.

I mean, because I know what they tell me. And they're not my age, they're millennials like 40, but they say, you know, L.A.'s great. They all have lived here. One of them is Barry Weiss. You know, you should read Hershey. That's great anti-bubble stuff there because they're not conservatives, but they're down the middle and the free press. I love it. But they live there, a couple other friends there, and they say, L.A.'s great, but you know what?

when I want to go out at 11 o'clock at night, there's so much happening. And this town is dead at 11 o'clock. Yeah, but you can also walk. I can, that's a big thing for me. That's a really big part of it. And I live in Brooklyn, and it's dense, but not crazy Manhattan dense.

Right. And the sense of community there is so fucking strong. Really? Oh, it's great. Yeah. I mean, we, unlike anything I've experienced, I've lived all over the place. And the sense of community there is really, they're proud, you know.

There's a pride to being in Brooklyn. And all the neighbors know each other. We all help each other. And I live on a fucking, you know, main street. And, you know, I got a brownstone, which is a dream of mine. Wow. Yeah. So that makes a difference.

I don't live in a building. Right. But being a, as I'm sure, you know, being a homeowner is like, God, there's so much fucking shit. And I'm a rich person complaining, but just every day there's a new fucking thing that you've got to take care of.

You have to take care of it or it's not going to get taken care of. But I love, I mean, I'm so happy there and my kid is happy and she goes to a very diverse school, public school. That's actually good.

It's good. It's probably good. It'd probably put another good person in the world, I think. Decent person who's, you know, tolerant. When you say diverse, you're referring to diversity of thought? I don't know. They're in fucking third grade, Bill. Well, you could indoctrinate people at any age. What?

Okay. You know, but diversity. She's indoctrinated into liking all people. Good. That's a good thing. Okay. But, you know, there is also diversity of thought. that certainly has been lacking in some parts

of our educational system. Yeah, I don't see that. I mean, she's in, she's doing division. She's learning division. But I'm talking about college, you know. I mean, Thomas Sol, who's a great writer, African-American, so we know we can believe what he says. And he said, next time you talk about diversity

at American universities, ask about how. how many Republicans there are in the sociology department. And I'm not a Republican. I'm just saying anything that's just all one team, it's not good. You need to hear that other side. You need to be checked. People need to be checked.

Yeah, I think they'll be... Including your little girl. Okay. She needs to be checked. I don't know what... Fuck that bitch. Fuck that little bitch with her black friends and trans friends. And not even understanding.

She doesn't know. Wait, she has trends, friends in third grade? Yeah. Yep. Okay. They know their trends in third grade. I knew one of her friends. I knew when he was a girl.

How old? I think just turned nine. And is just the coolest kid. I don't, you know, I think Boy to girl, girl, a boy? Girl to boy. Girl to boy, okay. And she has another very close friend

who's not in this school, but who's boy to girl at three, at three years old. A girl of a boy, you know, I mean, I knew somebody who said to me, actually more than one person who said to me, a woman, said, you know, I was what they called a tomboy. If I was alive now, an act of the way I did then,

that's what they would have done to me. Well, nobody's doing this to her. Well, I don't know. Literally, nobody is doing this to her. How old? She is, or he is either eight or, I think nine. Okay, then somebody is doing something because 80 or nine-year-olds can't do anything on their own.

No, they're buying them boys' clothes. Well, then they're doing something. They're doing. Sure, yes, you're right. They're buying them boys' clothes. And telling them you're a boy now. No, no, they're not telling them. They're just agreeing with it.

They're like going, okay, honey. They're agreeing with an eight-year-old. Yeah, that's right. When is their judgment ever been off at eight? You know, you know, you knew you weren't gay, right? That's, yeah, that's... It's not different. It is different.

No, it isn't. It's okay. Good luck with President Vance, because, as I always say to my woke friends, We voted for the same person. You're just why she lost. And this is a case of that. Wait, what? We voted for the same person.

You're just why she lost. Because America hears this, and they're going to go, Bill's right, eight-year-olds, can't really make decisions on their own like this. That's what most people are going to say. And this is where the Democrats are, with David Cross, living in Brooklyn, with Mandami loving

and this is why you know we're going to vote for J.D. Vance and that's I don't think it's American in a nutshell. I don't. Doesn't mean I don't love you.

No, I just, I disagree with you. I know, it's okay. I know it's okay. I'm sorry, you're right. I'm aware. I just want to impress upon you that the parents of the couple of kids I'm talking about are not doing anything.

If you are saying that buying that when they say I want, I want, you know, boys' pants as opposed to a skirt, you're saying that's doing something? I think that's... Well, the whole, I mean, it's not just the pants. It's just accepting the kid. the kid has you know okay maybe it's not anything to do with social contagion

the kid just knows right away at the age of whatever he's in the wrong body one of them was three one of them was three well sure three three year olds who can't believe a three year old it's not about believing them but kids are confused

and they hear there's a lot of talk in school there is confusion she wasn't in school yet she was three well I'm sure she hears things around the home. I'm sure they're... Okay. Well, what I'm saying is when I was a kid, we were too far the other way. We never heard about any of this. They should have told us. They should have said,

you know what? Most people are men or women, but not everybody. And if you're not one of those two things, that's okay. There are other... I totally agree with that. Okay, I know, I know. I'm not... I know. That wasn't the point. I know you agree. The point is... The point was, this is the way they should have done it when I was a kid. They went too far in this one direction

of just boys and girls who never introduced the concept that it could be something else. And they were wrong. They should have... What are you going to tell three? Could I just finish? Yes, sorry.

They should have included this because, but this is back in the day and they were too far that way. Now they've gone too far the other way and they have in many places introduced this concept so overwhelmingly that they have put the idea in kids' heads who probably wouldn't have thought about it otherwise, Warham just didn't know what kind of phase they were going through.

Again, girls were tomboys, etc. And every other country in the world is just a lot more careful than we are about just immediately going, okay, that's it, switch bodies, you're this now, and it's just not going to look good in the future. It just really isn't. It's my view, but we have to cut it there. I have a word from... You got to pee. I have a pee and a word from Del Monte.

But I do want to pick this up with you, and I appreciate you willing to talk to me about this, because some, like, of the woke, they won't even talk to me, which is, again, if you won't talk to somebody who voted for the same person as you, that's wrong. You've got to be... You know me enough to know. I will talk about anything.

I appreciate that. And I appreciate it. you know, this and having this opportunity. And, you know, who knew? Who knew we were going to get in the trans beef? I don't want beef with you. No, no. I've been too big a fan for too long ago.

I know, same here. I mean, it's all good. All right. Club. Randall. I need more beefs. I have so many beefs. And I'm a nicest guy in the overall.

Club Randall.