Club Random with Bill Maher - Lisa Kudrow Returns | Club Random with Bill Maher

Episode Date: June 15, 2026

Lisa Kudrow returns to Club Random for a second conversation with Bill Maher, and the Friends star proves once again why she's one of Hollywood's sharpest and most refreshingly un-Hollywood voices.Lisa reflects on The Comeback Season 3, playing a woman the industry keeps underestimating, her years at The Groundlings, and the acting teacher who taught her never to take rejection personally. Bill shares the most humiliating story of his sitcom career, working alongside Sam Kinison as drugs, chaos, and misplaced blame turned the set into a nightmare.The two compare disastrous early drug experiences, debate whether AI will reshape creativity or destroy it, discuss why Hollywood keeps making the same mistakes, and somehow spend ten hilarious minutes dissecting Spartacus. Oh—and did Lisa Kudrow just casually reveal that a Romy and Michele's High School Reunion sequel might actually be happening? Support our Advertisers: Get bugs out of your house with Pestie. Go to https://www.pestie.com/RANDOM for 10% off your order. Subscribe to the Club Random YouTube channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/c/clubrandompodcast?sub_confirmation=1⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Watch episodes ad-free – subscribe to Bill Maher’s Substack: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://billmaher.substack.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you listen: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/ClubRandom⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Club Random Merch: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://clubrandom.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices ABOUT CLUB RANDOM Bill Maher rewrites the rules of podcasting the way he did in television in this series of one on one, hour long conversations with a wide variety of unexpected guests in the undisclosed location called Club Random. There’s a whole big world out there that isn’t about politics and Bill and his guests—from Bill Burr and Jerry Seinfeld to Jordan Peterson, Quentin Tarantino and Neil DeGrasse Tyson—talk about all of it.  For advertising opportunities please email: [e-mail] ABOUT BILL MAHER Bill Maher was the host of “Politically Incorrect” (Comedy Central, ABC) from 1993-2002, and for the last fourteen years on HBO’s “Real Time,” Maher’s combination of unflinching honesty and big laughs have garnered him 40 Emmy nominations. Maher won his first Emmy in 2014 as executive producer for the HBO series, “VICE.” In October of 2008, this same combination was on display in Maher’s uproarious and unprecedented swipe at organized religion, “Religulous.” Maher has written five bestsellers: “True Story,” “Does Anybody Have a Problem with That? Politically Incorrect’s Greatest Hits,” “When You Ride Alone, You Ride with Bin Laden,” “New Rules: Polite Musings from a Timid Observer,” and most recently, “The New New Rules: A Funny Look at How Everybody But Me Has Their Head Up Their Ass.” FOLLOW CLUB RANDOM https://www.clubrandom.com https://www.facebook.com/Club-Random-101776489118185 https://twitter.com/clubrandom_ https://www.instagram.com/clubrandompodcast https://www.tiktok.com/@clubrandompodcast FOLLOW BILL MAHER https://www.billmaher.com https://twitter.com/billmaher https://www.instagram.com/billmaher Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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You're so not typical show business, anything, and I mean that in a good way. Well, what I'm about to say might change your mind. I think you'd like mushrooms. I mean, it's just... Okay, then I will. It's just, bring them on out. Well, I have you. That's what's important.

Hi. I'm so happy you came back to see me. I'm so happy you asked. Really? Yeah. What do you mean? Well, you know what? I think you and I are a lot of like, we kind of play it close to the vest.

You kind of have to like. You do? Well, you kind of have to. What are you saying? No. Like, you kind of have to, with people. Like, you have to go to get it from actions more than like, Some people are very effusive, you know, like they vomit a lot of love right away.

And, of course, at Joe Business, I'm a fan, is hello. Right. You can't not say it. Right. Well, you have to, though. You have to. You have to. You have to. I mean, don't you can sense when, you know, some people will need to know that.

They need to know that. It's just got to the, I mean, it's understandable. Maybe it was always this. It's just understandable that if you. you don't say it, it's conspicuous, then you're saying, I'm not familiar. Trust me, I've had people sit here who like, they don't really know what I do for a living. No. Oh, who?

I'm not going to say names. But is there any, like, musicians or like. Well, just like, not everybody watches your show. Younger. Not everybody watches your show. Right. You know? That's true.

You know, we all have our own, some people are only watching ESPN or only. Yes. Crime podcast. Ladies who kill, you know, their friends. Yeah. No, I know. That's true. And there's way too much to choose from.

Just in terms of entertainment. There's so many different kinds. It is an embarrassment of riches. When I think of when my youth and three, three, well, New York, the New York market, of course, we were, we had three local and three networks. So that was six channels. Oh. Some countries didn't, because some cities didn't have that. No, no, we had three networks.

Where were you? Here. In California? In California, yeah. And there's only three channels? Yeah, wasn't there? Well, I was a kid. I wasn't watching PBS.

I wasn't interested in Sesame Street as a kid. That was, PBS wasn't around when I was little. We had ABC, NBC and CBS, the three networks. There were three, there was no Fox. And then, but then we had local New York, W-O-R. W-N-E-W-W-P-I-X. Oh, yeah, right. You know.

Yes, we didn't have that. We had, yeah. Wow, you were deprived. No, we had it, too. K-T-L-A, Channel 13, that's what we call them. We called them channel numbers. That's where they put the kid shows like Officer, Officer Joe Bolton. Did you have him?

No. No? No. A cop. Cops were good. For kids? Of course, because a cop was the policeman is your friend. You know, we weren't in, you know, post-cynical.

And historical, I mean, cops have done a lot of shitty things, too. We're not making that up. No. But. There's good and bad. Yeah, most of them, I'm sure are. And we sure don't want to live without them. And I get the chip on their shoulder.

Yeah, yeah. But Officer Joe was, you know, with the policeman's cabin. And, you know, they had, who was your person who, like, there must have been. Captain Kangaroo. Captain Kangaroo. I liked. But I loved something called romper room, Miss Marianne. And she had a magic thing.

And she'd look... Oh, yeah, romper room, yeah, yeah, yeah. I liked it. And Wonderrama. We had that. Sunny Fox? Was that his name? Yeah, the host.

It was Sunny Fox? I believe that... I believe that is the guy. But I met him later. Sunny Fox? Yeah. I thought Sunny Fox owned Toys R.S. Okay, I don't know.

It could be a different Sunny Fox. No, but he was friends with... Or maybe I'm just making that up. No, I met him through Howard and Betty Fast. You know Howard Fast? No. The writer? No.

He wrote Spartacus. Sparticett? No. He wrote so many. Dalton Trumbull wrote Spartacus. No, that was a big black, you know, the blacklist. Howard Fast. Howard Fast was blacklisted.

And he wrote Spartacus? Yeah. Why do I think Dalton Trumbo, who was blacklisted, wrote Spartacus? You got him confused with Howard Fast, who was blacklisted also. Okay. Dalton Trumbow. Yeah. Yeah. No, he did. And Kirk Douglas, yeah, was in it and they fought about that. Well, whoever wrote it did a fucking awesome job. I mean, have you seen it recently?

No, not recently. You've seen it, though? I think so. I don't know. It's so great because it's like Stanley Kubrick before he did like the more unconventional ones that were, I mean, he certainly did, like, you know, everything he did was so different than its other movie. You know, there's no, like, genre of Stanley Kubrick. Uh-huh. Every movie is like it's its own genre, and then he's onto something else. But, like, that was 1960, and it's great to see that master of, like, the far-out

when he just said, okay, this is a studio picture, and I'm just going to make an awesome studio. I didn't know he directed it. I had no clue. Spartacus? Yeah. Uh-oh. What are we talking about? Maybe I don't know it.

Didn't he? We don't have our phones. We can't check anything. No. But I, I'm pretty sure he did. Wow. I think that was his, yeah, he did like paths of glory in the late 50s. He did, you know, you have to, you can't immediately get the job of, okay, you'd do whatever crazy shit, you know, 2001, a space audits here.

You learned the right to experiment. Right. Right. You did it conventionally. And I just thought it showed his great talent because when he put him his mind to that, he, he's, you know, he's. made a great popcorn movie. Because that's what it is. Yeah.

You know, it's a real lump in the throat. I am Spartacus. Yeah. I know that part. Yeah. I don't know. That's gladiator stuff. Yeah.

It's awesome. As a kid, I wasn't. Lawrence Olivier's in it. Oh. And Tony Curtis? Tony Curtis with his Brooklyn accent. Yeah. But who is flirting with him in it?

Gene Simmons. No, no, the man. Yes, you're right. They had the code for it. Whether a man likes oysters or clams, you know, they're saying it doesn't matter. They were saying it doesn't matter if you're straight or gay, but in 1960, that's as close as you could get. Oh, wow. But now, Gene Simmons was kind of hot.

She was the slave girl. Yeah. She was Spartis' girlfriend. Okay. Yeah. Spartacus. But he's being pursued by Crassus, who was a historical figure, part of the, the first triumvirate with Julia Caesar and Pompey and Kraus.

Okay. Yeah. And that's not, I won't be on the, it won't be on the test. I'm not huge on the Roman Empire. Okay. Which was, I should be. No, you should. If you're going to learn anything.

It's not uninteresting. Pretty impactful Roman Empire. Yeah, very, very impactful. But, so Crassus, he's pursuing. And so he's, Tony Curtis? No, he's pursuing Sparticus, who's Kirk Douglas. Yeah. And so he captures a.

his girlfriend and he's got her, he wants her to like like him. He's come on, look, this guy's a slave. He's got no good clothes and um, grasses and I got, you know, togas and look at that fucking great fire. And she's, you know, she's. How many outfits do you want? What? I have all these togas.

How many outfits do you want? I mean, today it just said. Today it would be a mansion. And she won't have it. At one point she says to him and he goes, you tread the ridge between truth and insults with the skill of a mountain goat. I was like, oh, I love movies.

Yeah. You know? Yeah. Just I love it when they talk for a good reason, not like we talk. Right. Have you read a transcript of anything you've said off the cuff? Oh, yeah.

So bad. Well, sometimes, yeah. Sometimes. Well, there's just a lot of... Yes, me. Off the cuff? Of course, because... No, you're quick.

We're quick, but what I'm saying is we lard our conversation with all this conversational spackle, these urs and ums. Yes, because we want to seem real. Because we weren't raised in Britain where they would, you know, they used to like, you know, they didn't say like. I know, when I do read how many likes and I means and... That's what I mean, you know, but it's okay. I was about to say, then I'm like, you know, come on, like, I'm 60. Why are you saying like?

Come on. Too old for that. I'm 70. Talk like a, no. Yeah. I thought we were in the same age. Yeah, 70. And I noticed you say it on the, you know, you're not afraid or you have a little bit where you allude to it in the show. You know, you don't, you don't hide from.

60. Oh, yeah, not to bury the lead, but you know, I told you when you're heard before. I mean, I'm the biggest fan of that series. Oh. I was so beyond delighted and shocked. I didn't hear anything about it until it was on. And I saw it list. I was looking.

Oh, I was like, oh, I'll watch these again. And it was like, oh, this is a third season. Yeah. They kind of kept it quiet there. Not really. No, I just missed it. You missed it, but that's okay. Yeah, because HBO was great at promotion.

Yeah. Well, I mean. Yeah, maybe they targeted it to, you know. I'm too old even for that. No, no, no, no, I don't. Not old. You know, well, I mean, look, so much support from gay men, I have to say, for the comeback. I love Valerie Cherish.

Don't take this the wrong way, gay men, but I so understand that. I mean that in the best way. Yes, me too. I do. Me too. I understand, too. And, you know, not to be facetious at all about, but why do game men? men are why they attracted to characters like that,

divas and so forth. And it's usually because they relate to the fact that it is harder for women. Certainly historically in this country, things have changed a lot and in many ways now, more of them go to college than men, blah, blah, blah. But there is still lots to do. And so they do relate to that sort of, you know,

I'm not on top, but I'm going to get onto the top. And you have to... Clunk and spirit. Get along to go along, right? So there are compromises. And, you know, someone's not going to be nice, and you have to just, okay, having a bad day, I guess. You know, you have to alter reality just a little bit

because it doesn't serve you. Honestly, that character itself should be in the Smithsonian with Archie Bunker. really I'm not kidding and Fonzie's jacket and it so captures an era and just something in the culture

I can't put my finger on it I don't have to because I know it's there and it's just it's this combination of you know some somewhat ravado but when she needs to be like you just love that courage that comes up because otherwise her instinct

is always to get along and to like make people like And of course, maybe it's me having spent a decade as an actor, I know the desperation of actors, you know, but you kind of like make, you do it in such a way that it's the desperation that we all feel. Yeah. That we relate to. It's just genius.

But the fact that you don't take it personally or feel threatened or, like, it's, that's fantastic things. Threatened? Well, there are a lot of, I think, well, I don't want to say it the wrong way. But, you know, there are a lot of straight men who just feel bad for her and can't bear it and can't watch it because she's being treated so horribly. First season, Polly G., the writer.

I got to say, that character was right on the edge of, like, I never made me think I'm not going to watch the show. I loved it too much. But, like, it was, I mean, I hope that actor is not like that in real life. He's not. And he's also the dad on Young Sheldon now. He was. They finished Young Sheldon. He's fine.

Lance Barber. He's great. He was so terrible. You're right. It was like it was hard to take. But to be fair, we didn't explain him because the camera was on her. But he was a writer and wrote a show. Network said, no, change it to four sexy singles.

That wasn't what he wrote. And then they said, and to hedge our bets, you got to keep that older one because we're doing a reality show. And you're going to have reality cameras around. Yeah. Of course he's pissed. We didn't explain that enough to justify. Yeah. I mean, I thought, well, we're letting you know a little.

Oh, I see. But, yeah, I thought it did need explanation. I really thought it did. I didn't because, like, there are bricks like that in Joe business. And I, you know. that is also true. You know, I mean, I've been, I remember once or a couple of times, but certainly one sticks out of just being, you know,

unfairly berated in front of the, you know, people are tense on sets. Yeah. Things happen on sets that probably don't happen quite as much at the office because there's just much more tension in the air and a lot more high-strung type of people. Yeah. And, uh...

No, as if there's so much at stake. Right? Isn't that how it is? Of course. It's like, we don't have time for this. We're gonna die if we don't. What? Get a better joke.

I don't know. Yeah, because... The egos are outrageous. But also the money's outrageous. Yes. You know, you know that as well as anyone. Yeah. No, that's true.

I mean, showrunners, though. You deserve it, but, you know, but no, that that's one reason why they're, like, like, because how much is a day of shooting cost? On a movie, it can cost like a million dollars a day or something. Right, but on a sitcom? No, I... You know, you're not, you're rehearsing. A day of rehearsing is a lot.

No. You know, on friends, they were great showrunners. So it really wasn't until I was working with Michael Patrick King, and he started, you know, fleshing out Polly G. And I thought, seriously, aren't we going too far? We got more writers in the writers' room. They all had... They all knew five showrunners that were as bad or worse than Polly G.

And I went, okay, then it's a thing. Wow. Okay. Oh, yeah, I'm sure. But there's a lot of people on a set that used to. I think it's so much better now. Take it out on the people they can take it out on if you're not number one or two. This thing I just alluded to?

That is exactly what happened to me. Were you a guest star on something? No, I was a regular on a sitcom. This is like my fourth sitcom. I was really over it mentally, and it was like my sitcom career, thank God, it was, you know, it was not ticking off. It was going down. So I think that this was called Charlie Hoover. That sounds familiar.

Yeah, it was Sam Kinnison. Oh, okay. Shortly before his passing. And the lead, let's just leave him out of it, but he was the one. who were like, it was, Sam was on heroin at the time. Oh. So, like, he'd be in the makeup chair like this. Oh, boy.

And we'd wait around for four hours that he woke up. So I feel like whatever tension and problems the show was having, it was a little more than that than whatever I, and somebody in that cast who had the authority to just blame me because you couldn't blame him because he was the co-star. Yeah. He was the co-star, and there's no show without him. He was very hot at the time.

Yeah. That's an excusable. I mean, didn't you remember thinking just like the sane inside of you? I know this has nothing to do with me, but it's just, this is deplorable behavior. It's just not right. And they don't seem to be self-aware of it, certainly not at the time. They're like, I guess, that they just survival. You know, everyone's surviving out there.

And it's like there's an actor who's like, he had a thing. Now he's on a sitcom. I'm not saying sitcoms are always a sign on your way down. In your case, it was, you know, mega-stardom into anything you want. So you had the greatest sitcom experience. Right. I had more the other one. Yeah.

So, but very often you get somebody, it's like somebody who was like maybe in the movies. And now the time has come to like, you know, take your sitcom like a man. Okay. Come on, Eric Stolt. Just fucking get rid of your pride. And so you got a guy like that who's like, oh, okay, I kind of make this, I fell off this rung of movie stardom, right? Now I'm on this rung, TV. Like, people have made that into a big thing, you know.

Bert Reynolds had a hit show. Yeah. movie stars have done that and landed very well on TV, but you don't want to lose this rung, then you're on a butt in reality. Yeah. So, like, that's his tension. Right, but you're leaving out the other part of that tension,

which is, I don't even want to fucking be here, and now I have to deal with overdose and, you know, and this guy who's so much funnier than I am. Yeah, this wise-ass comedian. Look, I'm not saying I couldn't have said something that was inappropriate, Lord knows. I never since. But, you know, yes, could I?

But, listen, I don't, if I think if it was anything, I would have remembered it, but I sure do remember getting my ass torn in front of the entire crew, and, you know, just the whole set, you know. And it's like, okay, you know, and like I said, this guy probably was very tense about his career.

Yeah. So, like, if this is what it took to keep peace with the co-star, then sorry, you know. Mm-hmm. Yeah. No, I, yeah. Show business. No, I think I had things approaching that, not that bad, because I was never enough of a threat, you know.

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design to handle any journey and look good doing it. This is the Alienware experience. This is the Alienware distilled into one iconic machine. Visit alienware.ca slash alienware 15 today. But... A threat on friends? No, no, I don't mean on friends. I would guest start a lot on things, you know. But I just wouldn't take it in.

I had the best acting teacher who wasn't really an acting teacher. He was just a, here's how you cope teacher. He's not teaching anyone acting. That's your business. But we're here to, you know, practice how you do what you do while auditioning and they're eating. Doesn't matter what they mean. Maybe what if they're hungry?

Don't take anything personally. It was so great. That was the acting teacher. Yes. I knew he was successful. And it was all cold, all cold reading. So we'd just hand you sides because people worked with him before an audition. And it was so great.

He even had us do a certain warm up. We'd get up for five minutes you're going to do stand-up. Wow. In front of it. There was only 10 people in the class. Yeah. How did it go? Well, you didn't plan it.

You didn't write it. You just stood up and spoke. And we learned immediately if you're okay, because he would say, and here's just what I'm going to tell you, if you're okay, the audience is going to be okay. If you're scared or you're nervous or you desperately want them to like you. Yes. That's not what they're here for. Right. So I would just talk and be okay, and I did groundlings improv.

I could work in something sort of funny, not stand-up funny, you know, not craft a joke. But, and it was fine, and it was, that was a huge lesson doing that. Like, yeah, if you're okay. And right, like, all of you who are really good, all right, a joke doesn't go, and you say, all right, that didn't work. anyway, you know, moving on or say something funny. Sometimes the crowd likes that better. Or, yeah. You know, when Johnny Carson made a living out of.

Yeah, and David Letterman. Yeah, well, yes, absolutely. Just be comfortable. Well, there's also, when a joke bombs for a comedian, there's something in the reality of that moment. Like, we all feel it. So the comic feels it and the audience feels it. So there is a huge tension that needs to be broken.

So if you can break the tension, a bigger laugh than the actual joke would. Right. Not that I try to fuck up joke, but once in a while. No, well. But, I mean, but it's not devastating if it doesn't go well. That's the trick, because they can tell when you're devastated. I did a roundtable with other actresses who do comedy and they're all younger and really talented.

And the question was, so how do you deal with, like you all did improv and bombing in front of an audience? Like, and they're going into these big explanations, too, about, well, you try to win him back. You've got to try to win him back. You got to da-da-da-da. And I thought, oh, I don't have an answer for this. I don't remember bombing. Right. And not because I didn't.

I do. Because I didn't let it in. Because I know I had, and I just thought, all right, but we got to keep going. But you were on stage with other people, like in an improv. But then you can blame it on them. I mean, like I have, you know, years of bombing. Not every time, every time at first, but, like, you know, it just... There's no other way to start.

There's no other way. Right? It's stand up. I never did. It's pretty brutal the first few years. Just because you're learning something as anyone learns anything, but you're learning it in front of people. I can learn something on the computer, and no one's laughing when I don't.

get it right away or whatever. I go, you know, here there's no, you know, you're just, that's, the way you're graded every time on your progress in what matters so much to you is there, like, obvious disapproval because, you know, you can't fake laughter. Right. People really don't. It's very involuntary. No, and you can tell courtesy. And you, when you hear like. Yeah, yes, a courtesy laugh. Someone make a sound, you know, in the audience where they're just like, someone make a sound. It's really trying. Yeah, maybe it'll, like kindling, it'll start a little brushfire of, no. No, it's, look, we're not heroes in any way.

We are just traveling. No, wait, I'm just, we're just minstrels and cartoonists of some sort. charlatans and Mount Banks, but we do have a kind of bravery. Yes, but that's the other thing I was going to say, because I, when you said you're starting out and you're just bombing over and over and over again, okay, what keeps you from quitting? What sends you back on that stage? That is the question. And it very much defines success.

I mean, there's a million reasons why success can conspire against you, show business. Some of it is luck and where you were and timing and whatever. But that's a big one. If you are willing to go back into the ring after you get your dick knocked in the dirt, you have a good chance of getting somewhere because it is knocking on a lot of doors and there's a lot of patience and a lot of rejection. But you're also not expecting, you don't have a chip

because you're not expecting someone to say, I'm going to give you a regular spot here. When you're starting out, if you've got the right attitude, there's no entitlement. There's just, oh, I'm working on it, and that's what I'm working toward, where someone says you're going to, I want you to come back,

I want you. Yeah, no. Right. That is completely true. Unfortunately. So humility, a certain level. Unfortunately, that is not the attitude I did. Really?

Yes. You thought like, what's wrong with everybody? Did you really? They're not laughing. Everyone's too stupid for what I do. That was, you were one of those guys? I, yes, yes. I can't deny it.

I mean, and that's partly the, partly the stupidity of youth and also partly, I wasn't always wrong, okay? Sometimes they were stupid. And sometimes it was a good joke. It's just, you know. Okay, but... But even if it was true, the last thing you want to do is convey that to them. You just have to...

Yeah, take it out on them. You can't, and I did. But, you know, that's what you... And you would, yeah. Oh, but everybody was, right? Well, when you're in your early... You weren't alone. No.

Everybody did that. No, they didn't. Oh, they didn't? I was particularly bad at it. Oh. I was... Many people just grinned all the way through it, as you should. I just was thick and a brash or whatever.

I don't know, but I made my life so much. Cornell. Cornell, as if that's anything. But no, I just made my life more difficult than it would have otherwise been if I could just have, you know, get it that you just. I've seen, and I would see other comics do it. You know, they would smile through it. Yeah, and then go backstage and say, boy, they fucking idiots didn't get the thing.

Or sometimes it takes full. 15 minutes to warm them up. Yeah. They're like Richard Gere in American Gigolo, you know, when he's like, took me two hours to bring her to orgasm. Who else would, you know, remember he took real pride in his job. Yeah, yeah. I kind of remember.

I think I blocked that stuff out. Oh, yeah, Richard. Oh, you should what? Sex. In American Jigolo? I'm just kidding. Did you ever see it? Yeah.

Well, you remember it. Kind of. It was cool? Maybe that's a guy thing. I just remember all the guys started trying to look like him. After that, every guy cared about how he looked and, you know, got a haircut. We were looks maxing. That's the movie that put our money on the map.

That was, really? Yes. I'm going to have, okay, knicker-in? I don't think you'll be upset. A knicker. You have a heroin here if you want. Have you ever had anyone? No.

Anyone? Do heroin. Here? Are you offering? No. No. No. I did it.

I smoked it once. I think my first year out here in 1983. Somebody had it. Somebody who turned out. We wound up doing a lot of heroin. and I don't think you're smoking, but at the time, yeah, nothing happened. Oh, lucky. Maybe that's just smoking, but I, like, zero.

But nothing happened the first time I smoked pot, and that's often the case with people. Right. The first time you smoke pot, it just doesn't, I don't know what that is, but. No, nothing happened than the next time. Yeah, you're... Yeah, the worst thing that ever happened to me. Yeah. What happened?

No, no, it just, it didn't go well. Why? It was a little too much. Oh, yeah. I was like 13, I think. Oh, whoa. Also. Yeah.

And I just remember thinking my friends are laughing. It's like, what are you laughing about? You're not high. This is year full of shit, because this is misery and I think I'm going to die. And you never did it again? Not till college. Yeah. And again, you know, it's like nothing's happening.

Take another bonnet and, you know, okay. And then all I were going out and I have two people holding me up, and we're going through a door and I just went with my boyfriend into his room and I was taking like a biocyte class because that's what it was called in the 80s. Bio-syche.

Now it's neuroscience. And I, the only comfort I could, I really thought I was going to die. Everything was racing. It was going too fast. Like slightly disassociating, I think. You know, it's just, ugh. And I would just, okay,

I know exactly which neurotransmitters. are firing too much. I just have to wait until, you know, the receptors can then, da-da-da-da-da. It's the worst feeling in the world. Maybe not the worst. I've never tortured in Vietnam.

I'm sure there are worse. But in my life, my charmed life, then when a psychic drug has a hold of you like that, doing something you didn't think it would do, and you don't, you, I've told this story before, but there was, I took, speed, not speed, like the drug, but they sold the stuff like Fenn Fenn.

Oh. You remember that? Yeah. Like it was diet drugs. Yes. But it was just, it was some nut from South America. And it was speed, very speedy. Wow.

And I did it with a pot brownie. And you don't know how much pod is in a brownie. Oh, okay. And I thought, oh, you know, I got a lot of work to do. I'll take the speedy thing. thing to give me energy and I'll take the pot brownie to psychic you know I love writing on well the combination I was like I didn't know I didn't know what reality was I didn't I couldn't move yeah like I felt like if I moved I would die like one inch so I was frozen at my desk

I could see the phone but I couldn't move and I don't know if that happened for 10 hours or 10 second right you know it's just yeah it's like and the you you you don't know I thought this is hell i'm in hell or yeah well it may it also it makes me wonder so horrible was it my mindset that this shouldn't be happening that makes it a nightmare or is it possible or would it have been possible to just like okay just go with this and then it would have been no My heart was going. Exactly. There is no doing that.

No. It's just a picture. It's sort of like the psychic version of food poisoning because once again, you have no control. And it's a scary feeling that you don't, I don't know when this is going to end my head with this crazy trip I'm on. And with food poisoning, I don't want to throw up. Yeah.

You're not doing it. I don't want to be, you know, puking while I'm having diarrhea. It doesn't matter. That's what we're doing. And you know, and you're just, you're bargaining with your own body. Please, just give me a minute. I promise, I'll throw up in a minute. I promise, I will.

Just give me one minute to, no, let's do it again now. Let's do it your way, huh, body? You know, I'm like, why can't we work together? I am you. And that's what that was with the fen, fen and the pot mixture. Yeah. Shit. So what'd you do?

So did you never do it again? I didn't know that what I mean. Just what I would do is never do that again. Oh, I certainly never did pot with Fenfin. Well, that's what I mean. Oh, yes, no. Or speed. No, no.

Yeah. Yeah, dumb idea. Have you done mushrooms or those things? And that's okay. Oh, great. That's what my husband says, yeah. Yeah, I mean, I haven't done it in quite a while. but when we did it in late college, 20s,

into my 30s, I think, not often, but it was just a laughter drug, complete laughter. You're just laughing your ass off at nothing. I know, but people do that with, and this is like the 70s when I was 13 and got too high. That was not the heavy stuff that it is now. Heavy mushrooms? No, no.

The pot in like the 70s was not as strong. Strong. And the fact that it had that effect on me made me never go near any kind of psychedelic thing. Terrified me. I mean, I think you'd like mushrooms. I mean, it's just, it's just, it's just, bring them on out. Here? I don't know.

I guess it's a good idea. Yeah. The gold digger. Bring them on out, girls. The whole tray of mushrooms. I mean, when I did it in college, I remember the first time, and, you know, we didn't know what we were doing, and we put it in like a tuna fish sandwich. It was disgusting.

Yeah, I know. But there were the actual stems. You know, it wasn't like a pill. It was mushroom. Right. No, I know. Dried, horrible-tasting root. I saw them.

You know. Because other people were doing that. And you'd eat the caps. I don't know. Whatever it was, it was fun. It was like, it was really fun. But what I think is going on with that drug is it is robbing you of all the, is it serotonin that makes us happy? Is that the one?

Yeah, maybe. One of those. Mushrooms are? While you're on it. I feel like it, that's why you're laughing and you're just hysterically. off the charts happy because it's just robbing it. Draining it. So that when you come down, it's like, oh.

Yeah. I remember that first time I came down, I was, it was at my parents' house where I was like for the weekend because it was like my first six months in comedy. And things are not going well. I'm just, you know. For six months.

Yeah. We've already talked about the beginning, how bad that can be. Yes. Yeah. I wasn't even up to the bad part. I was pre-bad. It was just horrible.

So to be in that moment in reality, when the serotonin was just rod. Depleted. Yeah. It was just a terrible combination. Right. I could see that. It was just a lot of... But you didn't have the mind expanding, like trees are talking and moving and any of that, wonderful stuff?

One time, my fingers looked like what they were like... Yeah. Little, not much. No. My mind didn't know. But that's just how people's minds are. Some people can't be hypnotized. Yeah.

I'm not surprised I didn't have a lot of hallucinations. I mean. Yeah, me, I'm very here. Me too. I'm very, present. You're very present. I know. You're so not typical show business, anything.

And I mean that in a good way. Okay. Well, what I'm about to say might change your mind. But, no, because I've been listening. to physicists that are, you know, thinking about the difficult question of consciousness and deciding that what makes the most sense is its consciousness is not in here. It exists in a field, the field that is everywhere. But it's not in here.

I don't understand that. You don't understand it. What do you mean everywhere? Well, you know, that all particles, waves, everything, you know, subatomic, there's entanglement, right? You've heard of that where... I have a, you know, New York Times, Tuesday Science Times, education on a lot of this stuff. That's about as much as... Yeah.

Like, I'm not like... But I'm not like... But I'm aware of all these things to a degree, and mostly, you know, that degree as well, I don't have a degree in this. So I get it. I don't have. I never took physics. Yeah. Because too abstract for me.

Yeah. It's one of those I call, I kind of get it. Kind of get it. Kind of get it. Anyway, there are things that we can't explain. Lots. And there's so much going. Quantum physics.

Yeah. Can't explain it. A lot of it. And then things that we experience that we can't explain. What happened? Like weird, not really a coincidence. It's more than a coincidence. Yes.

But you don't want to sound like a hippie freak. Right. Right. Well, I do, but yes. So people are too afraid to say, but now I'm, yeah, I'm in. Let's keep asking. Let's look into it. Well, I'm a big fan, certainly in the general of we don't know much.

Certainly that's always been my argument that I've made with people about medical matters. A lot of them think I'm too on the maybe left. I don't know, whatever it was. How is there a sign? Well, you know, like the far left is like, you know, vaccines are the greatest thing in the world. But we don't know. I'm not an anti-vaxxer, but at all, I never was. Right.

But, you know, that becomes a political thing. And it shouldn't. No. It should not. No, but I'm just saying people go to those polls. I know. I know. It makes me nervous to say.

And everything becomes you're taking a political side. No, I was just talking about, you know. But, I mean, I don't know. My consciousness, I do feel like it's all in here. I mean, I feel like I'm influenced by things out there. Okay. I'm going to say something. And cut you off again.

No, no. Because you like writing while smoking, right? Or being altered in some way. Yes, exactly. So a lot of neuroscientists, I'll say a lot, but neuroscientists are saying the brain is a great filter, especially this front part. And it really, it's filtering all the information you can't use to exist here. So there's a lot going on inside. I mean, for example, inside.

If your brain had to be aware of every cell dividing, no. Sorry, there's no room for that. Well, there's just as much as being proposed happening outside that we aren't aware of. So our brain has to filter all that out. Well, once you make the filter a little more permeable, you're getting access to some things. And creativity is one of those things that maybe doesn't start here,

but it comes in, you know, when you're in a flow or something is really... And that's what the machines can't do. Not yet. I don't know. Yeah. Because... Right. Well... Again, oh, yeah. So glad I made my... I'll just think of this. So glad I've been...

forget to tell you this. The thing this year with the AI is the perfect act three subject for this moment at this time. You're so right on the money. Yeah. Michael Patrick King, have to give him credit. Here's what we can do.

And of course, it's given the rate that AI is moving, it's like probably like two weeks ahead of reality. I mean, we were so afraid that by the time it came out, we would be... That's insane. Nothing like that, whatever happened. Talk about being at the head of the parade.

You are. It's such a great subject, and it's perfect for comedy and telling us what we need to know. I just did two weeks ago something. I cut this from the final version, but I was going to say that I was going to do this whole thing without any jokes in it, which I've never done in 23 years. What whole thing?

I always put this about AI. Oh, oh. Just to, and I didn't do that. Right. But just to make the point that I consider this so far and above the most important issue than anything else were, I mean, yes, there's Trump and nukes and that. But it's actually AI. That's what, that is, you know, Colonel Pepper in the kitchen with the doorknob or whatever that show is where you clue. Oh, clue.

You know, that's the. I don't know what he's talking about. What I'm saying is, you know, that's who the murderer is. Right. It's AI. And I'm more scared of it than anything and think it's more dire than anything. Yeah, maybe. But to me, the reason it's not, it can't, it's not just AI.

It's that human beings have created it and don't. really know what it is and don't know enough to put the guardrails in. That's what you're saying. No, no, but as a tool, if it could have been, if it's kept as a tool, because it needs human beings supervising. No, it'll probably, you know, some years, a few years from now, cure me of some terrible disease I otherwise would have died from. And then the next year, the robots will completely take over and nuke the world because in their computation, we are the problem. You know, there's a reason why Hinton, the godfather of AI, said there was a 10 to 20% chance of an extinction. Right.

I mean, and Musk has said, this shit scares me to hell. I know. Well, what are you going to do? I know. What are you going to do? No, because the genie's out of the bottle. Right. Well, at least we should be talking about that.

It's interesting someone who was just saying today somewhere about this, and the thought was the only thing that's going to stop AI from taking over is more AI, which was a scary thought to me, but it may be true. Right. And AI that's programmed to hack the existing AI that doesn't know better. or it's I yeah

yeah I don't know yeah yeah I don't know we well luckily we just stayed with but it's so sitcoms written by AI it's so

it's such a great premise and then by the end of it they've scanned her and she's like no no I docied that as if it's not a legal document that doesn't count but I also love the thing with the

they nobody Nobody saw Mrs. Hat. That killed me every time. It was on Epic. Like the look on her, but, you know, and she's miffed every time. Yeah. You know. But that's the pluckiness of that character.

I mean, she's, she could be Mary Richards, if Mary Richards was much more insecure. Well, yeah, or needed. And, yes, or talented. Thanks. I mean, she's. Yeah, I don't know how talented Valerie is. But she does know. Well, she keeps doing shows.

She knows serviceable sitcoms, for sure. That she knows. Well. Very well. I mean, I take her as much more successful than that because they always mention all the shows. Right, that's true. And she won an Emmy for the gritty single camera.

In real life, I mean, there are people like that who the audience just likes. And so Michael Landon always has a show. You know, he can be a fireman, he can be a boss. William Shatner. You know, you're an angel. You're a cop. You're a lawyer.

Whatever it is, we just like you. Ted Denson, we like you. God damn it. And it makes sense. Always be in a show. Yes. That's how kind of I see her biggest. It's not like she doesn't work.

Right, but AI picked her for this because who would do it. Like, you know there was an algorithm and who would do it for this much money. And, you know, and they just, by the end of it, they don't want a great, funny show. They just want a serviceable show. Yeah. That people, he'll say, Andrew Scott plays the head of the network. And he'll just say, we don't need it to be great. We just need it to be good enough so that it's on while people do whatever else.

It's second screen, and that's why they picked Valerie. So that's like the most evil thing in it. I mean, just that kind of thinking? Yeah, but it's already happening. I mean, look, we started, we thought reality TV was going to be the end of scripted television because it's cheaper. Right. But I don't know, audiences will always tell you what they want.

And, yeah, they do want some stupid stuff and silly things. They also want things that make them think and things that make them really laugh and they want The they want the option for all of it well and they want whatever it is I feel like they want the best that we can make Maybe that's why I I but not every night No not every night do you think like the crown people would Want the crown every night Or you know Or your show, every single night.

I am so. Like, oh, God, I got to think about, yeah, oh, that's scary. Shit, you know, like, you've got to have variety. I'm so behind on the crown. You never watched it? No, it's kind of a chick show, isn't it? I know. No.

No, that one's not. It really is it. Oh, I can like a good chick show, but... Yeah, but now, who knows if it's what you're learning? See, you're not going to do the character ever again, though. You said this is the word. You got very final about this is final, right? Yeah, yeah.

Just feels right, a trilogy. It feels full circle. Yeah. We started at what we thought would be almost an extinction event, and now here's the next one. Yeah. For entertainment, not for what you're talking about, because, yeah, it might be.

But, yeah, so it just feels, and now it's a trilogy. It's a piece. A thing that got fired turned into, you know, a three-part story. Yeah. And it merits, it makes sense for a trilogy. Like Godfather 3. I like it. It's entertaining.

But what's wrong with it is that the arc of that story ends at the end of two. Michael Corleone goes from, that's not my family, Kay. I don't know who these fucking gangsters are. But that ain't me. To killing his own brother. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. That's hilarious.

Once you've gone through that cycle, you're done. Yeah. And then I think they knew it. They were just making a gangster movie. He killed his own brother in two? At the end of two. At the end of two. Right.

Shit. Yeah. That's right. What movies do you watch? Look, if it's on a few good men, I can't not watch it. it. I don't know.

I can't help it. No, I know. Everyone's great. Everyone's great. Jack Nicholson. Tom Cruise. Demi Moore. Kevin Pollock.

So easy to watch. So good. So good. Oh, Kevin Pollock was a... He's great. Everything he does, yeah. I know. Yeah.

He had a good... I mean, we started his comics together, you know. Yeah. And then he got this great career as a... actor. Yeah. No, he's fantastic. Yeah, so I love that. And then the Sex and the City movie, the first one, if that's on, sorry, I'm going to watch it. I like it. I'm just like, I'm all over the place. You're just like, you don't purposely watch things, you just whatever's on? Yeah. Some people watch TV that way. That's so foreign to me. Oh, no. I don't enjoy it as much

when I look for it and put it on, unless I'm with my husband and he wants to watch, you know, something. I said, let's watch something. Can we just watch a good, like, romantic movie? Would you do that? Because it's not his thing. He's like, yes, yes, I will. Yes. And I said, okay, what about, oh, defending your life? Because it's also so good, Albert Brooks, Merrill Streep, defending your life where fear is the what he, I'm see, that's where I'm sorry, that came in and his great brain turned it into something. But fear, of course fear is, that's the worst. That is suffering.

That is, and then love is the opposite, and that makes everything okay. So that's what's about, I loved that whole paradigm. Defending your life, such a perfect structure. Perfect. Why do you think so? He wants to He dies Yeah

He goes to heaven But and he's put to the test Because he has to prove that he has courage Right Or that he wasn't afraid Like if you don't prove that you Why didn't you like yourself enough? Was the prosecution's point?

Why don't you love yourself? And he falls in love with Meryl Streep? And Meryl Streep loves herself And because she does There's generosity And she's not afraid of anything like that's the antidote to fear, love.

And it's such a big idea. And at the time I thought, really? I'm not sure, you know. She's going off at the end on the bus, right? Because you're like the bus in heaven, like that takes you to the next level. And he's gone another bus going like some crappy place. But he goes after her bus. To be with her.

Thereby also fixing his problem. And he's breaking a rule, which is a fear. And he's, yeah. But you see, that perfect structure of starting with a need and a desire and then having them, you know, boy, show business when it's good. I mean. No, because it's an idea that everybody gets and you're not even sure on what level you're getting it, but something about it makes you laugh because it's true or makes you cry because it feels true on some level. You know what I mean? When do you watch like TV or movies?

Do you watch movies on TV? I mean, I do. Yeah. Yeah. Do you go to the theater ever? Never, yeah. See? Do you?

No. And I feel bad, kind of. Okay. I mean, I can blow my brains out about it. So do I. So do I, you know? I'm not saying I'm a better person than you because I feel better. Just because, you know, I mean, you hear these directors.

It's like Martin Scorsese, who we all know is the greatest, and I love them, blah, blah. But, you know, they're all, like, it needs to be seen in the theater. It's like, okay, I'm sorry, I'm sure on your level in what you are seeing. But I'm just the young man in the 22nd row, you know. I'm just, I lock in the, I've even watched some of your movies in the kitchen. I'd seen them before, but, you know, I'm watching them again. I've seen it three times. By the way, that's how good they are.

Right. That I don't need this huge. experience. Right. It's so good that it works on that or on that in my family room. Or when I'm making a sandwich. Or when you, yes. I don't. You know what else I have? Oh, what I miss? Back it up a little so I can see. I want to see that again. And I don't need to be in a community to know whether it's funny and hear other people laughing. I don't either. Or, you know, crying.

I don't either, and sometimes that annoys me. You thought that was funny? I know. And... Or you didn't think that was funny? You thought that was funny, and I missed the next line, which I bet was actually funnier. Yeah, I've been the only guy laughing

in a theater. I think I have that memory a few times in my life. I laugh at the smile. small stuff. Like that side, like that muttering, that's, you know, right after the joke makes me laugh also. So like Lucy and Ethel, on I love Lucy, you know,

what made me laugh. Ethel going, oh, what? Oh, okay. Oh, you know, just like that. It felt like they were really there. And, oh, well, I didn't know. Honey, I, I, oh, honey, I didn't know. Yeah. That little stuff makes me laugh. Not that I'm obsessed, but again, And the idea that the audience isn't getting the best, the idea that somebody would say, like, well, it just, you know,

it just has to be good enough. It just, I really feel like as flawed as some of the stuff was in the past, for various reasons, some of it, you know, we don't want to get into the political, but I feel like the writers of Mikhail's Navy really did their best. You know, the writers of the Wild Wild West, and Star Trek and like everything I liked. Star Trek was something.

Beverly Hillbillies. I feel like, no, a bunch of guys got in the room and were like, oh, people like our show. And let's make this the funniest episode ever. And, you know, so, you know, it offends me that anyone would have that idea that with AI or whatever, just so good. I have never phoned it in. I don't think.

Yeah, no. And I've seen people phone in it, you know. Mm-hmm. But. Yeah. 33. I'm just going like, I probably have. Yeah.

No. No. But. You're, all, that, what's the movie with, where you're, like, you're with a rapper? Oh, my God. Come on. What is that? That one?

Marcy X. I love Marcy X. How? How? I said that was on fucking cable. I haven't never seen it. It's great. It's great.

Are you kidding? I'm not. I didn't even have to do press for it. I just remember. That's how much it was like, yeah, I guess this didn't work. It's really funny. I'm stone now, so I can't remember what. Okay, we don't have to.

That's okay. What you tell me, you did it. Remind me. What's the plot? You're... My father is very wealthy. He has a heart attack. Does he die?

No, I don't know. You inherit something? And I inherit a record, failing record label. And Dan Wayans, who's fantastic. Failing record label, right. Yeah, is the star rapper. Star rapper. And I'm this, like, rich Jap from New York.

It's great. It's great. I'm telling you. Nobody ever told you that? Nobody saw it? No. You know what? Never.

I was not aware of it until it just popped up. You know, every movie comes, if you flip through the 50 movie channels. Okay, maybe you were stoned when it came up. No, when it came up, I said, I've never seen that. Like, what is this? You were in it. I was like, oh, I'm definitely going to watch this. I was not disappointed.

I honestly. Wow. And Damon Land. Yes, very funny. The whole fucking thing is funny. He's great. Well, I think it. Who directed it?

Who wrote it? Richard Benjamin wrote it. directed it. Richard Benjamin. He directed it. Oh. And... Tell the kids who Richard Benjamin is.

Richard Benjamin. Yeah. They don't know. He was in everything. Wait, what's the big one? Well, he was married to Paul Apprentice. Well, yeah. And they had a show when I was a kid.

He and she. He and she was so awesome. Yeah. And only one... No, not Heartbreak Kid. What was he? Not a heartbreak kid. No.

God. Port noise complaint? Yes. He had a fine career as an actor. But he also... Catch 22? No, no. Catch 22 is Mike Nichols.

No, no. He didn't direct it. He directed my favorite year. Oh, he was in it, yes. Yeah. My favorite year? Oh, yeah. No, and lots of stuff.

He was lovely. He was so nice. So he did that movie. And Paul Rudnick wrote it. Oh, Paul Rudnick is a genius. I loved him. We used to be on Politically Incorrect. So funny.

Do you remember the column he used to write? No. There was a, movie magazine back when we had magazines, and he wrote a column called If You Ask Me, and it was, you know, he's a gay man. It was from the, it's this woman Libby or something, and it was just her view of the reviewing movies. It really was so funny if you're looking for something from the past. Yeah. But so that, what a pedigree for that movie. You, Paul Rudnick, and Richard Benjamin? Right. Oh, so why are you surprised it's good?

it's so good surprised because it barely got a release I wasn't required to do press what's it to do with good what is it to do with good well it didn't it felt fraught the whole time I'm sure it was yeah it was aren't movies pretty usually

rough no I mean I did some independent films that were not at all that were great those were easy easy would you if they said if they said we're doing the next season of of, you know, women where there's been a murder shows.

Oh, Snoop, one of those lady Snoop shows. Yeah. Not Mrs. Hat. No, like Big Little Lives, I think, you know, like A-listers like you who are involved with a, oh please. No, I'm gonna say, but would you do a show like that? Yeah, I mean, it depends on who else.

Yeah, why not? Oh, that would be great. You should also do a White Lotus. Don't you think? I don't know. That would be great for you. Really? Don't you think?

I don't know. What do you want to do now, now that you're not going to be... Well, I might be doing Romeo and Michelle sequel, that movie. Romeo Michelle's High School, or you... Oh, I got to watch that one again. Yeah, I remember it. Might do that soon. Very soon.

Yeah. And then I don't know. I'm up for whatever. I hear there are very nice sets now. And people are not like what you described on sitcoms. And there are people that just really want everyone to be professional and get along and focus on the work. I'm sure there always were, but way less in the past. No, but there were people that felt like,

no no it's fine you know when movies are when everything goes smoothly the movie's terrible i just went that doesn't there's that doesn't make any sense so i think everyone could be decent to each other too and it could be okay i just remember hearing about how awesome dailies were when i was like doing movies like i mean the dailies are you know everyone was like so jazzed about to did you see that it's like would you go did you go did you Did you ever go see Dailies? No. You weren't invited.

Right. I wouldn't have been invited. Did they ever have my own trailer? No, I was never rose to that level. I did like cannibal women in the avocado jungle of death in D.C. Cab, this is my acting career. Murder, she wrote. I was on twice. But did you like acting?

You know, at the time, you know, I was mid, late 20s into my 30s. Yeah, I mean, I did. There's a satisfaction in nailing your close-up that is a real high. Yeah. And I'm sure people like yourself who do it way better than me and have had an awesome long career, that high is worth chasing way more than it was for me to chase it. And it was never really my destiny anyway. Acting you're a character and I'm better at being exactly who I am.

And acting is sort of the reverse of that. Right. It's very hard just to be exactly who you are with someone else writing the words for you, especially. That's hard. But I think the reverse, I think it's harder to be, you know. Someone else? Well, the way, I mean. Oh, I love being someone else.

Of course. That's why you're good at that. Wow. You know. Yeah. I could see also why you want to be Valerie. Yeah. It's just so much fun to slip into that.

Because nothing bothers. her. Not really. You know, she just makes up a reason why it's okay. None of my business. Yeah. You haven't seen the last one. I tried to. They wouldn't give it to you? No, it's only up to

six on my machine. Yeah, right. And there's eight? Eight, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, the last one is good. They're all good. They caught on, you know, the streamers at first that was like a binge,

binge away and they were like, oh, you know what? People are just going to binge and then cancel. And they were like, oh. Yeah, let's go back to how we did it in my day on TV where you watched once a week and that's why people came back to your product. Right. So, yeah, of course. Now if I want to.

And now they have commercials. They have upfrents again. I just heard there's going to be upfronts for HBO Macs. For HBO Mac? Uh-huh. Upfronts because they're going to have. one tier. Oh, yeah.

Lower price subscription. Yes. With commercials. Well, they already do that on Epic. No, like on... Netflix does it? No, no. I don't think so, I thought.

But somebody does it. Somebody does it that way because I tried to watch something once and it's like, oh. Oh. I see. I have to sit through a commercial. Yeah. Oh, I watch History Channel and I can get... I only watch one show on it.

And there's always, there's like three minutes of ads. And I'm not used to that anymore. I don't care for it. You can't fast forward. Oh, I hate fucking... That's not fair. I hate streaming. They've ruined sports.

Oh. They've ruined it. Why? It used to be all the games were on one channel. Yeah. So you're just like, okay, all I do is turn that with the game. Now it's all over. You never know where the game is.

It's on some of them are ESPN, NBC, ABC. Wait, it's not one network or one. streamer that got all of them? No. So we have to hunt for the fucking game. Wow. And then it is harder to fast forward through streaming. You can't do it with old DVR. I know grandpa. You can see how fast you're going. You can see where to stop. You can blip through the commercials and know you can't do that. Why? Because it just doesn't because they don't want you to. Is it live? Streaming. live, is that why?

If I want to like zip through the commercial, it's not easy to do on stream. It's just not easy. Right. It's as if it's on demand and you're stuck with the whoever sponsored that segment. Yeah. I don't know.

Do we sound, I don't know what you're talking about. I guess. I'm talking about zipping through things. I know, but. It's harder on streaming. Okay. It just is. And they do lots of shit like that.

I call it reverse improvement. You know, like things were, I mean, half the, the stuff just to get the TV on. I mean, I don't want to sound like Andy Rooney. Remember who used to hit a button and the TV would come on? And have you opened a bag of potato chips lightly? It's mostly air.

That's true. But TV is so important to me. Me too. I mean, it's what I watch it at the end of the day. Well, I watch it, you know, I have it on, I have a TV in the kitchen, the bathroom, my office. but if I really want to watch something, I watch it in bed at night because I'm just just watching it.

I'm not taking a bath, I'm not making a sandwich, I'm not unpacking my briefcase. So I watch your show from the bed. It's the highest compliment I can give to a Thespian. What an honor. I said Thespian. Yeah. So.

Why? Oh, because you said Lesbian, Thespian. Thespian, yeah. I'm assuming the audience. Did he say lesbian? Exactly. Can't say that? You know, I have to watch at least an hour of TV before I go to bed.

Me too. Probably not the right time to do it, they say, because you shouldn't be screens. It's kind of the opposite effect of what you're... No, no, no. That's my wind down. Me too. That's my wind down. I know.

Yeah. But that light is not great right before you sleep, but to bed. It's worth the trade-off. And I have to watch sitcoms before I go to sleep. Is that? Yeah, because it's not, like, I watch, I can't watch your show before going to bed because it, no, no, it lights my brain up. Go to bed and fury. It gets me thinking.

No, because it gets me thinking. And, oh, that's a good point. You wake up, you punch the shit out of your pillow. No. It's feathers all over the place. No. No. No.

Well, what's like old sitcoms? Yeah, well, they're all old. What's a new one? Well, I mean, like old like Andy Griffith show. Oh, no, not that old. Not that old? No, I've done all in the family, though. That was fun.

I like doing that. And I've watched Andy Griffith, but at night, right now it's Will and Grace. Makes me laugh out loud. 30 Rock makes me laugh out loud. 30 Rock. And recently, friends, I did finally watch friends all the way through. And it made me laugh out loud. Pretty good.

It was the most popular show in my lifetime I've ever heard about it. Yeah. Me too. Wow. Yeah. It was really something. Sometimes I forget because, you know, I'm such a fan of everything else too. I think, oh yeah, and she's also that icon one.

The icon on that icon show. It's iconic. It is. Thank God for it. Let me do the other things I wanted to do. It had a beetle-esque feeling from, I always thought from the fans. Aside from the fact that they love the product, they love the show, they love the Beetle-Mood. But they really were emotionally invested in the band liking each other. It was like painful if they thought mommy and daddy were fighting. John and Paul were beefing or, you know, John. And Paul were beefing or, you know, John.

John Leonard wrote a couple of mean songs about it. It was like, oh, come on, you guys. And I felt like you, you gang had the same thing. No, we really liked each other, yeah. We really did. Well, yeah, I mean, that's good too. Yeah. Oh, that people were invested in that is what you mean.

For the audience, you know, we, and look. You can see it. You can, I don't know, maybe you can't tell. I mean, there were shows I love and I didn't know they all hated each other. Right. Yeah. They're acting. Right. Well.

But yeah, I think there's a special chemistry that does come through. Yeah. You know, I mean, it has to, certainly, with familiarity over the years and going through each other's problems. I mean, you were young. Yeah. So young people do, I think, do a lot more sharing. Yeah.

Although I was 30 when we started that. I was the oldest one. I mean. To 40. An adult. Yeah, an adult. But that is. Vantage point of 70 to me that's young.

Yeah, well, me too now. Well, just because I know how I was acting when I was 30, and it certainly wasn't like a mature adult. Right. Yeah. That's right. You know. That's right.

I went drove to a part. I was 32, I believe. I drove from my house in West Hollywood to the beach. I think it was Labor Day in my Mercedes top down. without a shirt on, and did not bring a shirt, as I recall. You know, these are the... So Hollywood. I call this, who was in my body moment?

So if I remember that, I know specifically I did that, I think, okay, that was my brain. What else was I getting wrong? Interesting. You know, at that age. Yeah. What else must have been a skew? But that's a male. Women's brains, I think, mature much faster.

And 30, they are adults. Not a man. Yeah. Not this man. Well, I always, I couldn't wait to be 30 from when I was 10. So I was always, you know, that doesn't seem safe. What are you doing? Why is everyone an idiot?

Is there such unnecessary risks, you know? I was the best teenager ever. I wanted to get a childhood overwith also. Yeah. I looked up to adults. I wanted to be one. Me too. I'm a control freak, so children are not in control.

Yeah. So it's a fundamental. It's not like I had a bad childhood, but I wasn't fundamentally in a state unsuitable to me as a small tyrant. But was, was there anything worse than when there was a substitute teacher in grade school? And everyone was just like screaming because it was a substitute teacher. It wasn't the regular teacher. And everyone was, it was pure chaos. Oh, it was the worst.

I hated it. Are you one of those people who thinks high school did nothing for you? Yeah. Well, no. I think it did. Yeah. That's where I took biology and honors biology and fell in love with that. And yeah, I liked that.

But socially, yeah, I mean, my first year, we started in sophomore year. So 10th grade was the first year of high school. And, yeah, I thought, okay, we'll go to a football game. Then we'll go to parties. And two of those, and I was done. Like, oh, they're just getting drunk and even more stupid. You're already so stupid. Oh, no.

Like, now what? That's 10th grade, figured that out, and so did my other friends. Yeah. See, so I had women to men. That's why the girls were... No, the other girls were thrilled to be there. That was, we were weird, the four of us. We were just weird.

Weird because ahead, because you were, yeah. When I got to college, Cornell, the first year in the dorm, I got ostracized because they were having shaving cream fights. And like the first few times, okay, it's funny. Like the 10th time and I said something and then I was like made myself into ostracism, boy. I mean, I'm telling you the dumb things. You were a drag. Like, yeah.

You were such a drag, because it wasn't funny enough. It wasn't entertaining enough for you. I mean, it was... Did you like sitting around having intellectual conversations? No? In the dorm? Yeah. I had one friend.

No. I mean, it was terrible. But once you made friends outside of the dorm, is that what was fun for you to, like, sit around talk about... Yes. Well, I didn't... I mean, it was rough the first couple of years. didn't barely.

First I wanted to have a girlfriend. I gave up on that after I was like, if I could just have a friend. Oh, no. That's how lonely. Yeah, Cornell's liked it. So eventually I did hook up with a great guy who was one of friends for life.

Oh, great. We smoked our first pot together, really. And, you know, we were pot dealers together in college. And we did speed. a few times and speed, I mean, like, I know that they make it like this anymore. You would be up for 12 hours having great conversations, or you thought they were great conversations. But there was that feeling of like, wow, you know, my mind is alive. And, you know, this person is, you know, we're playing ping pong mentally.

And it's one of the greatest pleasures of life. Right. I mean, you know. That's why I keep saying I'm no fun at a dinner. party. Because I don't know what to do with the chit-chat ever. You know, I just get, mm-hmm. Well, just pick out one person and talk to them. Yeah. But you probably have that at home. Yeah. I mean, if you're married for a long time, it's probably because you have that mental ping pong that the person is just, you know, a person can just endlessly delight you mentally. Yeah. Oh, we sometimes can't get

through a show because it's pause and then we talk about something for 20 minutes and yeah and then it's okay great so you're going to go to bed now right because now I can just watch something and not get through it well I am just so flattered that you would steal away to talk I mean it come on it's you I appreciate I'm finding this out I'm telling you action speed speak very loudly and I'm just thrilled that you like me that much I do, and I have a lot of, and I have a lot of respect for you. I appreciate it. Yeah.

Well, then. A lot of respect for you. All right. I won't bother you, but. Yeah, that would be great. But I wish I could. No. But, yeah, well, come back here or...

Tomorrow? No. Sometime. I hope I get to talk to you more often than I have. Okay. But I appreciate it. And I guess we're plugging the... Season three of the comeback.

Season three of the comeback. I don't know if we did that formally. Well. I don't know when this drops, but certainly maybe all eight will have been on by then. Yeah, I hope. But if not, just watch all eight. It's so good. Thank you.

I love it when I have a show, you know, that I'm just dying to see. That's great news to me from you, honestly. Okay. Thrilled. All right, how much you? Bill Maher likes our show. Oh, I love that. Good show.

Thanks. Well, am I going to be 80 and do another fifth season five? Like, uh-uh.