Crime in Sports - #161 - A Wombleybing In Your Dingamaroo - The Exploitativeness of Lorrie Wilmot

Episode Date: May 14, 2019

This week, we look at a man who was revered in his home country, and was one of his sport's more popular players. He played for decades, before retiring to a quiet life as a paprika farmer, in the countryside. This all sounds wonderful, except for the fact that he also crushes the back roads, looking for women to pay for all sorts of non sports related activities! The trial, the appeals.. it's a mess! Does he end up getting away with his reprehensible crime?? Find out! Also, we have no luck with the nuances of cricket, so we must make up a game of our own, based loosely on our idea of what cricket may be! Make your home province proud with your sporting exploits, make your whole province shameful with your non-sporting exploits, and figure out what paprika is with Lorrie Wilmot!! Check us out, every Tuesday! We will continue to bring you the biggest idiots in sports history!! Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman Donate at... patreon.com/crimeinsports or with paypal.com using our email: [e-mail] Get all the CIS & STM merch at crimeinsports.threadless.com Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things CIS & STM!! Contact us on... twitter.com/[e-mail]/Crimeinsportsinstagram.com/smalltownmurder  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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A first listen is waiting for you when you start your free trial at audible.ca. The Queen of the Courtroom is back. How did I know that? i have crystal ball in my head new cases leave her a long so uh this is not a so this is a period classic judy it's streaming you can say anything it's an all-new season judy justice only on freebie Hello and welcome to Crime and Sports. Yay! Oh, yay indeed and Sports. Yay! Oh, yay indeed, Jimmy. Yay indeed.

My name is James Petragallo. I'm here with my co-host. I am Jimmy Wissman. Thank you folks so much for joining us today on another insanely crazy, wild, just hold on to your damn rail and your roller coaster edition of Crime and Sports. This is a crazy one because we're jumping without a net today. It's one of these where we are doing, we're in a country we've never been in before, doing a sport that we've done like once very poorly because we know not a fucking thing about it. And water polo.

Well, no, we figured that out sort of by the end of that. But sports always hit pregnant chicken can do it but cricket oh we have no idea and the greatest thing is since we've done the cricket episode so many people from like england and other countries where cricket is very prominent have sent us messages going i see it every day i grew up with it i still don't know what the fuck is going on so you're not alone to just look at it you're never going to figure it out like even if you're inundated with it it's still complicated and weird you can watch baseball

and figure it out and be like alright yeah yeah they gotta do this you totally can figure it out yeah it's it's it's very simple cricket you're like why they why they bounce what is happening and then he hits it but if it's fun I don't know we'll talk about it because we'll talk about our complete lack of understanding of the rules of cricket.

Trust me. And I did my best, because Busby in Australia fucking loves cricket. Oh, and I read about... I'm doing all this. I've watched cricket to try to figure it out, and I'll read and then watch at the same time. It doesn't make any sense to me. I have no idea what's happening. All I know is...

That's the sport with the sticky wicket, right? wear helmets for some reason but they don't the balls are thrown at the ground so i don't know how they're gonna get in the head with the goddamn thing unless you foul it off yeah but it's not called the foul it's called like a didgeridoo dip or some shit when you i don't know what's going on we'll get into that we'll get into that some house cleaning hey go with that because when you get drilled in the head with it you're that humming yeah yeah oh i got didgeridoo dipped so that's when you fell off a cricket ball and cricket uh before that house cleaning wise thank you guys for all your reviews this week they really do help a lot so thank you if you haven't done it yet please get on the purple icon there

apple podcast itunes whatever the hell it is. Give us five stars. I know it takes a second to sign in, but we had to figure out cricket. So give us a goddamn break here. Or didn't. That's right. We had to try to figure out cricket. We had to spend a lot of time failing to figure out cricket. So it doesn't matter what you say.

It's not for our ego. It's really just to drive us up the charts. So it doesn't matter. Just following instructions, following directions. Here's your goddamn review. I don't think they let you curse, but here's your review, idiots. That's fine. We're happy with that as long as there's five stars attached to it.

That'd be great. Also, go to shutupandgivememurder.com for all of your crime and sports and small town murder needs, all of your mugs and your leggings and your T-shirts and everything like that that you want. Also, though, more more importantly tickets to live shows because uh this week um the what is it the 15th and the 15th is pre-sale right 17th of may here is a full-on sale for small town murder tour all the dates are up there there's a ton of stuff and i know there's no crime and sports right now but we're working on it it's gonna happen it's gonna happen there will be a crime in sports this year a live crime in sports we don't know where it is yet and we sort of do but we can't tell you but

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show which is another thing uh you can do i don't know if i can spell it and say it all right my best they'll give it a shot we'll see how it goes give it a run give it a run. We'll see how it goes. Give it a run. Give it a run. So here we go. Let's lift off here. Let's go to another place, another continent, another country, and another sport. And let's talk about somebody else. Is it Africa? Let's talk about another asshole. It is Africa. Oh, look at me.

It is Africa. We are going to talk about Anthony Lorraine Wilmot, who you've never heard of, better known as Laurie Wilmot. How? This is a man. Say his name again? Anthony Lorraine Wilmot. Okay, I get it.

In other countries, I don't know. Lorraine might be a man's name. I mean, here, there's different names. You can do whatever you want. You can do whatever you want. That's fine. But when I hear the word Lorraine, I had a great aunt. Racist nan nan sister's name

is lorraine so i picture an old lady who makes racist jokes isn't that uh the guy from uh wasn't wasn't that who wasn't that calvin's mom in uh back to the future wasn't that oh yeah yeah that was her name lorraine that there you go so that's what i mean it's like it's like a it's like a 50s woman with like a tight haircut that's like up and like, you know, in curlers at night. That's sort of thing. Being assaulted by Biff in the backseat. Being assaulted by Biff and then later on laughing it off like that.

Well, that's. That was a funny thing. That was the 50s. Like super strange. Hilarious. Hilarious. He tried to rape me. Have I told you the joke about the four black guys and the Polack?

That would be like, that's how they are. So that's what I picture. But he goes by Laurie, which is L-O-R-R-I-E. Nope. So Anthony Lorraine Wilmot, Laurie Wilmot. That's all you're ever going to hear here. Born June 1st, 1943. So he's an older fella here, as we'll talk about.

And Jesus, this guy's a scumbag. We've had a lot of like like, cracky guys lately. We went on a crack run. We did. We went on a nice crack run that was fun. It was a good, I wanted a crack run, so we went on a crack binge. What do you want from us? So we did a binge of kind of cracky episodes.

And this guy, I promise you, never smokes crack. Not crack once. No crack, no. Drugs are not involved here at all. It's way worse than that. Not even any drugs. No. I mean, he was born in 1943.

So, I mean, maybe he was on something to make his hip feel better in his older years. I'm not sure. He missed it. Yeah. He was born in the wrong time. Didn't do drugs for fun, I don't think. We'll put it that way. He's born in Somerset East, which is in Eastern Cape, South Africa.

Uh, this, uh, area here, I had to just kind of figure out what the hell it was. And, uh, this area, I guess the whole, the area he's from is, is where, uh, white people came first. Uh, as there's a big, a big, uh, kerfuffle there of what they even call those people because let's face it uh we're elephant in the room off the top here it's south africa there's there's there's just always a racial component to south africa especially if we're talking pre you know pre-ending of apartheid and it goes on today but i mean like then it was i was written the fucking open it was in the law

so the south africa is predominantly occupied by white people at this point, right? Fuck no. No? No. Way more black people. Really? The white people just fucking run everything and own everything. Oh, got it.

Yeah. Because they came in and were basically like, this place is nice. Yeah, we'll, we'll, you're, we'll take all this land and shit. And you guys work for us. Well, maybe. Probably not, though. Probably just stay in the slums. Get away from the ocean. There are more white people coming. It's weird. And I've been reading. It's true, maybe. Probably not, though. Probably just stay in the slums. Get away from the ocean.

There are more white people coming. It's weird. And I've been reading. It's true, man. Make room. Make room. Hey, we have more coming. What did you think?

This is all we brought? We're holding these seats. No. I put my jacket on it. Did anyone? No one noticed? No. No. I put my jacket. Three. No one noticed? No. I put my jacket.

Three black guys sat down anyway. What the fuck? That's what was going on. They're like, no, no, we're here. They just showed up like, this is good. Which we shouldn't talk because that's where we're sitting. They just showed up on a boat and went, yeah, this is good. All you red guys, move back.

Different people. He showed up on a boat and went, yeah, this is good. All you red guys, move back. Different people. But to this day, there's a huge issue of whether these people are called settlers or pioneers. That's a big issue. I'm unclear, even after reading a lot about it, I'm unclear which side wants it to be called which. Because they both sound sort of pro.

Yeah. They both sound like here, settler and pioneer both have positive connotations. Same thing. Whereas there, one of those is negative. Really? Yeah. I think maybe settler is negative. I think that's the negative one. That sounds right because it was already settled, Dickhead.

Or they wanted it to be. Yeah, I think so. They called themselves the settlers and then the people were pissed off and were were like you're not settlers and then they said how about pioneers and they were like all right that's fine which still it's whatever pioneer just sounds like first guy to do it that's yeah yeah which you know which is really second guy to do it which is yeah there's a shit load more guys there so uh yeah this this place was founded quote unquote, by Lord Charles Somerset in 1825. So their history of people being there other than native people is a lot newer than us. It's very similar to us.

It's very similar, just newer. Yeah. And it's strange because here I feel like people, and not to be anything political, it's just kind of common sense, is I feel like people here not to be anything political is just kind of common sense is i feel like people here after a while there were so many more european people here that there was like god look how much look how much many of us more there is of us this is clearly ours now and whereas does not that that makes it better i'm just saying whereas there it's like you're such a such a minority too on the on the it makes no sense like it's just a very strange thing there's

35 of you here yeah it's what are we doing somehow we took the place over it's it's it's fucked up it's fucked up it would be like fascinating but they they just they're just taking the credit for making it uh better which yeah in a way because for them yeah because you've got like plumbing and shit yeah then you brought mcdonald's and that's not better not only that i was just reading an article about south africa yesterday actually during this and it was completely separate of this like it just came up anyway in a just google news thing and then uh i read it and i was like oh well i'm doing south africa anyway might as well read about this and they were talking about how you know there's the cities there are some of the the worst divide from rich and poor really in the world like makes us look like shit and we're terrible with that but they're between the two gap it's basically yeah the rich

and then it falls off a cliff to poor like there's not a big you got people with a benzo and then you got people walking on old tires they're showing're showing like there's this picture of this beautiful neighborhood with these beautiful houses. And they're like sitting up on this wall overlooking just I mean, what? What is the slums? But what looks like that can't be occupied. It looks like whatever was down there burned down about five years ago. And people have been pissing on it ever since on the embers just to make sure. And that's what it is.

But people are living in that and they don't there's no plumbing in half these places and it's fucking horrible so yeah there's a big south africa's a weird place uh and it's gotten i guess we're bad with the uh with the you know the wealth discrepancies so there's no middle class at all i don't know about that i'm not positive i don't know everything i just know like in certain areas that it's very there'll be rich neighborhoods butted right up against the slummiest slums. Just South America's got the same type of thing there.

So it's Seattle. Well, yeah, but there wasn't much slum in Seattle. It was just homeless encampments. That's what I meant. Yeah. There's homeless and then there's people with houses. Yeah, yeah. It's not like much in between.

It's like when you looked south driving through El Paso and went jesus south el paso looks like shit and i said you mean juarez mexico jimmy that's not even that's a whole other country over there that's my favorite story of anything we've ever experienced because it highlights not just uh like and not just highlights an economic divide it also seriously highlights my stupidity and geography we we had just crossed exactly where we were we just went through a border fucking check we just went through a border check with guys in gray fucking brown shirts and dogs and everything and we just went through that and'm like, those people look really not doing very well. South El Paso, get it together. Jesus. Wow.

What's going on over there? They're not capable of just moving to North El Paso, Jimmy. They've got to really stop suckling off the government's teeth. Look at it over there. South El Paso. Look at the difference between North and South El Paso. Mind-boggling.

The sad thing is it's not that bad. I always told you the South side sucks in every town. You're like, Jimmy, that's the North side. Outside of like a Whataburger and some Starbucks, it's really not that different. El Paso's a shit hole. It's not. El Paso's not great. See, I can say

that because we're not going there this year. See you in Houston. Yeah, we will be in because we're not going there this year. See you in Houston. Yeah, we will be in Houston and Dallas, which is on the other side of the state where they probably mercilessly make fun of El Paso. That's their punchline. Like, they're from El Paso. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Oh, yeah. Applause. I feel like that's how it works there. That's their punchline. El Paso. Maybe Amarillo. I'm not sure. Maybe. But El Paso's way worse. That old panhandle. That'll get you works there. That's their punchline. El Paso, maybe Amarillo. I'm not sure. But El Paso is way worse. That old panhandle. That'll get you every time. That's bad stuff.

But El Paso still. I don't care. I wouldn't give a fuck if that was like, El Paso was like a small suburb as a capital of a big city. The worst. It's still a piece of shit. It is. It's horrible.

It's so bad. Apparently this area, there's a lot of forest and mountains and things like that. It's a kind of a rural area where he's from. There's a natural reserve in the area. That's a big wooded, you know, I guess like a forest national forest type place there. There's it's a bird watching nation there. Also, there's so many trees and bird washing. They track them down, grab them, and wash them really.

That's hard. That's a hard gig. That's one of the hardest gigs in South Africa is a bird washer. Really. Once you get a hold of them, I mean, they're small. They're pretty easy to wash. But to catch and grab onto them, they really don't want to be caught and held. I'll tell you that much right now.

That just sounds like a car wash and they just fly through they're going through okay i saw the brushes i saw a guy grabbing onto him be like will you fucking stop moving as he like as a toothbrush like i'm supposed to wash you asshole and he's my job come on god damn it it's for your own fucking good maybe if you use the bird bath i wouldn't have to do this you lazy bastard flying around like an asshole all day you fucking shitty house so anyway uh yeah bird washing uh again i said it because i'm looking at something else and that's what it says wow okay people do wash birds there james i'm the dumb one one. Jesus Christ. Trout fishing also there. There's local dams. There's all sorts of trout going on there.

Also, malaria-free safari, they call it. Got to brag on that. You have to specify. No malaria on this one, guys. That's fucking hilarious. Malaria-free safari. That makes me... Why do we have to bring malaria up at all?

Is the possibility of it make it cheaper? Yeah. Is that what it is? Is this like a more expensive as a deluxe gold package? We guarantee. But I just want to back. At that point, I don't. I just.

I guess. It's just funny that they would have to mention it to the mere mention of malaria makes me go malaria free or not. I'm thinking about malaria now. i don't want to go there uh also hunting and they have a golf course in this area that sort of thing so uh one person said of the eastern cape uh they said that you this is kind of the the way you could sum up this area uh quote there are only two seasons here cricket season and hunting season oh so that's all they give a shit about is it's kind of like it's like alabama they have college football season and hunting season which i think are the same thing and the rest of the year they hibernate that's it if you go to alabama in they kind of overlap though i imagine well i mean if you go right now there's just the streets

are empty everyone's everyone's hibernating that's what they're hunting something they're no no it's it's the summer they have i don't i don't know what they're i'm sure there's like it's like possum season or something but uh yeah something but there's times of year when it's not hunting or college football season they all hibernate and it's very nice you go there's very quiet you have to be when you go to alabama everyone's sleeping they're hibernating everyone it's all they care about it's not no and then that fucking roll tide starts it boy and everybody wakes up wake right up boy okay let's do this let's get some fatty meats and sit the fuck down and watch this push the beer in me push the beer in me uh they they

say that cricket here is like a it's like a way of life it's like a religion here it's it's a huge deal uh they talk about uh um that this is like one of those places where cricket's so popular but uh it hasn't really in the last 30 40 years hasn't really produced any big national stars or anything like that uh it's a kind of a weird deal here reluctant to ask based on what your response is going to be this dumbass question is this the uh this is not the horn of africa that tip right is that the other area i'm not sure but the corn of africa is the horn up at that corner or is the horn on the bottom corner i think it's on the bottom but i this is the eastern cape i think the horn's the west side. I don't know. So dumb. Listen, I did not study the geographical implications of this episode at all. I've just heard the word the horn a lot. Yeah, yeah.

I know you have to go around the horns. I know it's at the bottom. I just don't know. Or is that at the top near that canal where the shipping vessels come through? No, no, no. That's a totally different thing. Okay. Yeah, that's a totally different thing.

All right. So that's where the pirates are at at the bottom. I think that's the bottom. Well, on the sides there. Okay. Somalia is down the side. So this is a a totally different. All right. So that's where the like pirates are at the bottom. The bottom. Well, on the sides there. Okay. Somalia is down the side. So this is a scary area. Up on top.

Well, it depends. Yeah. Well, I don't know. Maybe. That's my question. I feel like anywhere where is a scary piratey area. Honestly. Anything that surrounds the circumference of Africa.

Or anywhere. Yeah. I would rather, i don't know do anything than be on a fucking cruise okay like anything anything a cruise yeah a cruise i'm not going out there because it's like even if it's for fun you're all going to get sick and shit all over each other if it's a cruise and otherwise you're going to get stolen by pirates and hijacks so either way you're right and're fucked. And I don't want some immigrant journey across the... I don't want that.

That's how my grandmother got here. You know what I mean? In a freighter. To escape a destroyed war fucking battered country. I don't know. I'm not doing that. This is not 1947. Smoke on your face from a diesel?

Yeah, with soot on me and shit. I got to wear one of those gray paperboy caps with soot on my face. Derby? Yeah, and soot on me and shit. And I got to wear like one of those like gray paperboy caps with soot on my face. Derby? Yeah, and a wool coat. I got to get there and not know my name and be renamed. And it's going to be a mess. I can't do it. So it's dangerous.

It's dangerous. Our friend, our friend comedian Dan Cummins went and did a cruise thing. And I was like, you're out of your fucking mind. No. And then you're trapped you're out of your fucking mind. No. And then you're trapped on a boat with people after you've done your act. Are you nuts? Are you out of your fucking mind? And you can't go from green room to cabin?

Well, the worst, they could hate you. And then you're stuck on a boat for days with a bunch of people who fucking hate you and know your innermost thoughts that you just told them on stage. And now they hate your guts. or even worse, they like you and then you're stuck on a fucking boat with them for three days. Quoting your jokes and telling you how great you are. A lot of new friends that you're overwhelmed to have in a confined space. Well, you're just trying to get the lobster.

And how many murder movies take place on a cruise ship? A lot. All of them. Someone's going to kill you. They plunk. How do we get rid of the body? I don't know. Push them into the fucking a cruise ship? All of them. All of them. Someone's going to kill you. They plunk. How do we get rid of the body? I don't know. Push them into the fucking ocean.

They'll never find them. We're in the middle of the ocean. It's gone. So it's very dangerous. That's where they put Osama bin Laden. Put him in there. And Goldie Hawn. Right.

Both. So, you know. So, yeah, this place here, apparently race relations are troubled in this area as well. They talk about in this area how there's there's been, I guess, some restitution racially in this area. People have been given certain land. I don't know if it's been given away or money. I'm not sure. But it's mainly like white commercial farmers here.

So this pisses off. Sure black people obviously uh there uh they talk about crime is a big deal here south africa from everything i've heard is the it's like fucking cambodia in the 70s like it's like the fucking deer hunter over there it's a mess no you don't like it like i can't remember what comedian it was i mean it's just it's unpredictable oh it No, you don't like it. I can't remember what comedian it was. I mean, it's unpredictable. Oh, it's unpredictable. I can't remember what comedian it was, but they were on a podcast talking about going to South Africa. There was some kind of stop in some circuit down. Somebody who was bringing in comics all the time in South Africa and paying him a great deal of money to be there.

And this guy talked about he went outside of his hotel and literally he said the door hadn't closed behind him before he was robbed already. Holy shit. He said the fucking door hadn't closed to the hotel. He could still hear people checking in as the fucking guy was robbing him. Was it the doorman? He just stepped out. Okay, what's good? Give me your shit.

And he was like, what? I'm not even. Wait a sec. I'm not on the street yet. Hold on. I'm on base. He's like a game of tag. I'm not in yet. I'm on base. He's like a game of tag. I'm not in yet.

I'm still. Air conditioning is still hitting my neck. I'm observing shit right now. And then once I cross the street, then I'm into the mix. And then you can rob me fine. It's like double dutch. I haven't even taken my first jump yet. Olly olly oxen free.

This is not good. It's fucking ridiculous. So that's, South Africa's got some crime. Let's fucking ridiculous so that that's south africa's got some crime let's just say that it's a very crimey uh kind of country here uh they also talk about uh kind of the way sex works here is a little there's some it's a little rapey we'll just say oh no it's a little weird it's a little um gray area it weird, man. Oh, God. They talk about... There's just some... It's almost like it's...

I feel like it's very Alabama-y, not in terms of that, but there's some backwoods shit going on that nobody... Some people make booze in the woods and shit. Okay. There's people... There's stuff like that. Some hill shit going on. Not really Alabama.

More of Arkansas, we'll say. More of Ozark-type situation happening here. Under the guise of we're doing this Metropolitan-like. Yeah. Real cosmopolitan. More Tombstone. Sorry. Very cosmopolitan.

So this guy here, he ends up playing cricket, obviously. I don't know much about his childhood. I know that he's got a brother. He's got a brother, Norman. Norman Neil Wilmot. He gets all man names. Why is this guy? What happened to Lorraine?

What happened to fucking Lorraine over here? And Norman is a very... It's as manly as it gets. It's like an old man. Yeah. Norman's a guy whose balls hit the toilet water. You know what I mean? That's an old man right there. There's no confusion. When you say, this is Norman, you go, oh, where's that dude? Yeah, where's he? Yeah, there's a guy whose balls hit the toilet water. You know what I mean? That's an old man right there.

There's no confusion. When you say, this is Norman, you go, oh, where's that dude? Yeah, where's he? Yeah, there's no, where is he or she? Are they here yet? That never comes out of your mouth when you hear Norman. Did they have a great time? No, you just go, is he all right?

Is that fat fuck okay? Norman's such a guy name, you can call him a fat fuck before you meet him, and he'd be okay with it. That's what a guy he is. He knows he's got a few pounds to lose. Norman's such a guy name you can call him a fat fuck before you meet him and he'd be okay with it. That's what a guy he is. He knows he's got a few pounds to lose. It's true. It's true. Even if he's not a giant fat fuck, he makes fun of the fat that he does have. Okay.

I'm obsessed with this lately because we're on the subject of the way men kind of interact with each other. We have been, Sarah and I have been on a binge. She did somebody's podcast, had to watch an episode of Fl with each other. We have been, Sarah and I have been on a binge. She did somebody's podcast, had to watch an episode of Flavor of Love. Oh, great. Okay, for this podcast. I remember that she was doing that. Yeah, so I watched it with her.

And so then we went on this binge of old shitty reality shows that are on Hulu. And so we've been just up to our ass and just trash, just absolute fucking trash. And it's just so funny the way the difference between like the way men and women are in these shows is so fucking funny when you watch basically anything like you're we were watching uh uh i love new york okay oh that was that girl is the girl that flavor flay didn't pick twice right

how hilarious is that but didn't pick her twice didn't pick her twice give her a show and at the time it was like the highest rated show in the history of crazy shit right so they're out they have this thing where uh she has you know whatever the three guys left and they bring their mom and dad out to dinner with them and they all have this fucking thing yeah and she has this italian fat guy there and he's got his italian and they're the most guinea fucking they're they're great i mean his dad's like how you doing he's got a little chain hanging out and he looks like you know he's in a union you know what i mean he does that right you know i go down i go down the shore once in a while you know he's uh no they seem like really kind of like blue collar time okay and his mom's just

this loud lady and immediately starts arguing with fucking new york's mom oh jesus they're fucking going at cats and dogs going back and you're a transvestite she calls her and i'm like holy shit like they're going i mean hard at each other and she's calling her an ugly pig and they're going back and forth the father sitting so new york between them to where his hair's blowing from both sides of both of them yelling he doesn't fucking look up from his pasta you just see him twirling it at one point he blows on it and takes a bite like it's not even fucking happening he has figured out a way to tune this out completely every other it's amazing though just they fight like and all

the guys are like i don't know what's going on watch like any of the despot is really great watch any of the desperate housewives show they're all going at the guys are sitting there just going i don't know what's going on they gotta believe they're recording like pushing their eyebrows aside i don't know i gotta check anything i gotta piss or something hey johnny what are you doing nothing all right let's just sit here and wait is it waterfall the main course coming soon are they gonna set the table after she just threw it but they're gonna reset it okay good it's fucking hilarious they're just like i don't want this drama when the guys fight it's like what'd you do what fuck you and they start punching each other that's yeah there's a fight and then somebody gets arrested they're friends like three days later they get arrested and then the dude that

gets punched bails them out yeah it's so it's so fucking weird yeah we're i think we're the dumb ones honestly in this scenario we're the idiots but probably just sit there and baby yeah we go along with the fucking program so uh i that had nothing to do with anything but it was very interesting to me now uh this this guy here he ends up he's a right-handed uh right-handed batter and they have his bowling style as right arm medium. Oh. I don't know if that's... So he's a pitcher? I don't know.

Also? I guess, is that right arm medium? Is that an arm angle, a speed? I think. Uh-oh. One of those? Yes. Does he have a medium length arm?

Does he have one arm that's shorter than the other? That he bowls? I don't know how this works. So his brother norman played professional cricket okay his brother norman started in 1957 so the both of them are pitchers or uh i don't know players i don't know who's pitching and catching jimmy but uh they're both playing let's just put it that way lorraine's playing with norman if you know what i mean so So, yeah, he plays 1958. Apparently, he plays on and off until 1968, 69. But then his stats don't really make sense for a long career.

So I don't know what to make of it. It says that he's got, okay, I think that's seven matches. And he's got, I don't know what's going on here. This is in the 70 season? I don't know what's going on here okay this is in the 70 season i don't know this is this is his whole career i have batting and fielding averages and then i have bowling averages okay uh he has 321 runs start playing bowling is that what happened is the bowling average like a 260 i don't think it's okay is it like it's not like baseball i don't think we're like the bowler then is like off for four days and then he bowls again one day i think that's a good point i think maybe the bowler plays

other positions and then somebody else and then he rotates in yeah i think so that makes sense i don't know i i don't know nobody takes this shit serious anyway i don't know what kind of skill set you need to be a bowler there is what i'm getting at like i don't know to pick up a shift in his day job yeah that's probably right you're right so he's he's coming in later so it's whatever you get he's medium but like in america to be a pitcher you have to be like a freak of nature and throw a throw the ball throw a ball harder than like 99.999 of the rest of the population i don't know if you need that and And in a window that's ridiculously small. It's ridiculous.

It doesn't make any sense. That's why baseball is hard because there's like eight good pitchers in the entire fucking league. It's a very hard position to master. It's not that great. It's difficult. It's hard. It's fucking hard. I don't know if it's the same level of difficulty. Because you're bouncing it off the fucking ground.

You're bouncing it. I don't know. And I don't know the goal because I don't know if the goal is to get him to hit it where you want it or to get him to miss. But it doesn't seem the fucking thing is big and flat and the ball is big. I don't know how you miss the fucking thing. I don't know how you're missing it. So because guys bunt, which is essentially the same fucking shit, they bunt by holding

a round bat and a smaller fucking ball. So that would be harder fuck yeah than a big flat if they had a big flat fucking paddle to bunt with everybody'd be a great bunter so what i'm getting at is i don't know if the goal what the goal of throwing the fucking ball and bouncing it off the ground you're trying to get it by him or trying to get him to hit it to where you want or what whereas i know in baseball there's some guys who are trying to get contact but most of the time they'd be thrilled if you didn't hit the ball at all don't touch it yeah that'd be great the bet that's the best option that works for me the least amount of risk

swing and completely or just watch me throw your strikes down the middle either one but uh or or nip it and then it goes into the catcher's mitt best case scenario that's terrific done deal one pitch over let's get it go well they'd have to pop it up because otherwise it's a foul tip right that's my point but if he catches it then it's out only on strike three oh yeah otherwise you'd have to hit it kind of i don't know what the actual trajectory of the rule is for that how far up it's gotta go how far up the angle what's the angle yeah that's a good point i feel like yeah because how many feet off the ground ump suppose he tips it and it bounces off the catcher's shoulder pad or you know chest protector and bounces into the air then the catcher catches it well it went up in

the air is that an out now is it done i've never seen that happen in baseball and it's been going on for 150 years turn around and look at that ump and go if anybody's ever seen that happen in baseball let me know yeah because i don't fucking know but is it isn't it just a little nip off the bat and into the catcher's mitt isn't that an out no no no they call that there's a strike what the shit foul that doesn't make any sense foul tip a foul tip is different than a foul foul tip is just tipping into the glove and caught is a fucking out strike three that's a strike that's that counts as strike three otherwise a foul tip is just well that's bullshit that's that's interesting so uh i don't know so neil played for a while i don't know what the fuck he was doing i don't That counts as strike three. Otherwise, a foul tip is just a foul. Well, that's bullshit. That's interesting.

So, I don't know. So, Neil played for a while. I don't know what the fuck he was doing. I don't understand his stats, but he played for a while here. At least ten years. At least, supposedly, yeah. And in that, he got seven matches in, apparently. I don't know if that's only... I think that's only in...

Because there's different levels of cricket. I think that might have only been in the major one, but then he played for 10 years in the Class A, I believe it is, because there's first class, and I think there's Class A, and I'm sure I'm wrong about that. But he plays for several teams, kind of. Laurie over here, Anthony Lorraine. Laurie, starting in 1958, he starts playing for teams uh like kind of minor league teams kind of under the eastern uh province uh banner banner around the horn yeah he's playing

i don't know they have minor league teams i guess lesser teams that are sort of connected with them like they have in soccer like this you have to have some sort of feeder system you can't just get a guy and grab some kids plunk them into the starting lineup so plumbers yeah no shit it would be at that point so 1961 here uh uh the uh eastern province cricket team uh uh there we talk about them they're in first class domestic first class at that point i don't know what the fuck that means. This team ends up kind of going through them. They won two Curry cups, which is not a cup full of Curry. It's not a big Stanley cup just teaming

with Curry. C-U-R-R-I-E. Some man, I assume, who was important in the game of cricket. I'm not sure. Or the guy who Where are you going with this? I'm on board. Or the guy who... Where are you going with this? I'm on board. Disenfranchised the most black people, I was going to say.

I don't know. That's who they would name a trophy after, I feel like. I wish I would have diverted that attention right now. Hey, it's not me. It's them. Fuck you up for me. I'm picking on them. I got you.

So also, they won two of those, apparently, in 88-89 and the 91-92. And then the Standard Bank Cup, they have a couple of those. The South African, they have none of those, never mind. And then the Gillette-Nissan Cup, they won four times. Jesus. Which I don't know which is bigger. Well, I think it was Gillette, then it was Nissan. Got it. Because there's one called the Standard Bank Cup that used to be the Benson & Hedges Cup. Which I don't know which is bigger. Well, I think it was Gillette. Then it was Nissan.

Got it. Because there's one called the Standard Bank Cup that used to be the Benson and Hedges Cup. Oh. Because they changed sponsors. Got to get rid of that. Yeah, like a NASCAR. Pull that tobacco out of there. Yeah, it used to be the Winston Cup, but now it's the whatever the fuck. Yeah.

Isn't it? Does Nextel still exist? I don't even know. I haven't heard someone's fucking phone beep like a walkie-talkie and someone speak into it in a stupid shade of yellow. I don't even know i've never i haven't heard someone's fucking phone beep like a walkie talkie and someone speak into it in a stupid shade of yellow i don't even remember fucking i want a phone that looks like my it looks like i stole it from my baby's toy fucking chest that's what i want i want one of those can we walkie talkie yeah jesus christ can you nine or nine or me james i want everyone to hear it yeah everyone i want them to hear your side, my side, the beep. I want it to really, really just stop a supermarket cold is what I want. So I don't know what the NASCAR Cup is anymore.

I just know that it's a cup. Yeah. It used to be the next cup. Yeah. I'll bet it still is. It probably is. I don't know what the fuck. Even if the shit's defunct, they don't care.

It's like the Verizon Cup now. I don't even know. What's the bad one? The Boost Mobile? Yeah, Boost Mobile Cup. The Boost Mobile Cup. The Cricket Cup. We need to reach a lower audience. How do we do that?

How about Boost Mobile? Yes. The Boost Mobile Cup. Well, it's really just our audience. That's their audience. Yeah, this audience. I know. I was joking.

I was was joking. I was fucking joking. Jesus Christ. Besides Jeremy Mayfield's wife. That's what they're aiming at. Can we get Jeremy Mayfield's family in this? Oh, my God. Boost Mobile it is. Boost Mobile.

She should do all ads for everything on NASCAR. I would love it. That'd be great. And then at the end, she'd just scream, not guilty. That's it. This is Shana Mayfield for pens oil hi my husband did not smoke meth no meth was found in his house even though there's a police report that says he had meth and he fails multiple drug tests in a three-day period for meth pens oil the best for your engine but when he drives our lawnmower to the restaurant for our Sunday dinner, it is lubricated by Pennzoil.

Filled to the brim with Pennzoil. I'll tell you that right now. Check it. Pennzoil. Jesus Christ. I say, Jeremy, there's Pennzoil in this fucking lawnmower, ain't it? And he goes, yes, there is, honey. And I say, that's right now.

Until those checks stop clearing. Then we're going to Castro. You know how that goes the wait is over so far you're not losing the only thing you're losing is my patience quickly i see that the queen of the courtroom is back i didn't do anything you wouldn't know the truth if it came up and slapped you in the face. I see he's not intimidated by anything. I can fix that. New cases.

She wanted to fight me. Leave her alone. Okay, so, um... This is not a so. This is a period. Classic Judy. Did you sleep with her? Yes, Your Honor. You married his cousin.

His brother. That's not him. Yes, ma'am. I would make a beeline for the door. The Emmy Award winning series returns. How did I know that? I have a crystal ball in my head. It's an all new season.

It's streaming. You can say anything. Judy Justice. Only on Freebie. me. You can say anything. Judy Justice, only on Freebie. If you don't know when Crystal Pepsi was discontinued, what was in Al Capone's vault, or which famous meteorologist is Lenny Kravitz's second cousin, then you haven't spent enough time on Wikipedia. But that's okay. I am here for you. I'm Darcy Carden, and I'm inviting you to listen to my new podcast, WikiHole from SmartList Media.

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So, I don't know if this is good, but this is a very cricket sentence. Wilmot is said to have once hit a six off New Zealand spinner John Sparling that went 120 meters hell yeah jesus that's 360 feet yeah that's like uh that's like you know a power alley home run at wrigley field basically that's uh he hit a six though he had a six off off it's the spinner which one is the six is that the spitter hit a six is that the spitter well he throws a spinner, this guy. Yeah, it's a spinner-spitter. Is that a sixth spinner? I don't know. Or is it six? Oh, my.

Is that a sixth pitch? I don't know. Does that mean? Did he foul five off? Was there a three and two count going? And then he, I don't know what happened. Or is that the, is that that dirty slider? His number six.

Fuck. The old number six. Ah, we're going to run a number six on him. He ordered up the number six. And we run a number six on him. We go into town a-womping and a-womping. Every living thing within an inch of his life. And he took it 360.

He took that number six. He took it deep. You didn't give me more Blazing Sands. Sorry. I didn't realize that's where we were going. I didn't know we had to keep the script going. Oh, we're going to rape the shit out of them at the number six dance afterwards. Sorry.

Jesus Christ, Jimmy. Do I have to be everybody? I need you to do the right i need to be tagger and hedley lamar the fuck is going on here you want from me i didn't know you wanted page 122 i want hedley lamar from you that's what i want give Give the governor a rump. Sorry. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm watching that tonight now. You should. Everyone should. Watch Blazing Saddles.

It's fucking fantastic. It still holds up. God, it's great. It's such a good movie. It's fucking more. It's better now. Yeah, it really is. It really is better now.

Because now everything needs to be made fun of. And it makes you miss the lead character. Oh, Christ. It makes you miss him. Cleavon Little. Yes, Cleavon. It makes you miss the lead character. Oh, Christ. It makes you miss him. Cleavon Little. Yes, Cleavon. It makes you miss him because he's dead. And you go, what would have happened?

And Gene Wilder because you go, oh, damn it. I think he's still alive. No, he just died two years ago. Oh, he just died. That's right. But before that, he wasn't acting for years. He did like an A&E movie and that's it. Take a script, Gene.

We need you. We need you right now. You're a goddamn genius. You are. You are Dr. Frankenstein and Willy Wonka. You understand the range that fucking it takes to do that? That's a lot. There's a lot in between.

Kids welcome or no kids allowed. And a cowboy. Yeah. Really, all in a two-year period. Oh, boys. Well, they made fucking Young Frankenstein and blazing saddles in the same year did they really think about that those movies were produced in the same fucking calendar year mel brooks made two of the top 25 comedy classic movies of all time in the

same 12-month period and used the bonkers the same lead character the same uh yeah headlining character yeah well gene wilder's good shit. He was amazing. Back then, that was at Scorsese. He had De Niro. He had Gene Wilder. That's the way they did it. So 65-66 here.

His highest score. Whoa. I don't even know what this means. I wrote this down, and I don't know what it means. So I'm going to just read it. means i i wrote this down and i don't know what it means so i'm gonna just read it uh his highest score of 222 not out made against southern not out made what does that mean against southern rhodesia in 1965-66 was at the time the second highest score achieved by an eastern province batsman to what 222 so is that 222 at bats and didn't get out i think no i think that's

in a game he had a score of 222 that's crazy but i don't think yeah i don't think there's a a one-to-one run to cricket score ratio i don't think to cricket point ratio you can score more you're right you know what i know that's true because you can score more points just you can score 100 you can score six seven points on a hit right yeah i think if you if you drop a didgeridoo on somebody right that's 10 points and then they do you yeah that's that's another that's 20 i believe and then if you if you pop up a whirly schmuggle it's i believe a whirly schmuggle is worth uh i believe that's a 50 pointer so harry potter i'm not i don't even know what that is

i think at that point you're it's worth a lot more yeah so he had like four whirly smuggles uh didgeridoo and a uh and a doo-doo and a doo-doo all and he had all those i believe in one and then you were clever i just went dirty yeah i'm sorry do do fuck cricket I try I genuinely tried so hard to actually care about this sport so difficult and it's so worldly and so many people give a shit about it oh god I would love to

understand it fucking understand how or why don't try to explain it to us by the way don't do it we can't I feel like you have to I don't know if it's a border thing but I don't think there's a soul who was born in America who understands cricket. I just don't think they get it. Outside of Casey Jones and the Ninja Turtles, they don't know it exists. Yeah, they don't.

They know the bat. That's a cricket bat. It's a bitchin' bat. It's a badass bat. Holy shit. The cricket bat that we have. Yeah. God damn it.

Oh, my God. Look it up. It's right there. They're so good. It's on the tip of my of my tongue too because we've said it a million times but it's a fucking awesome cricket bat and then we got sent it we really dig it i think that's why you'd play the sport yeah just because the bat's cool right it's got a dope bat sick weapon but the the the helmet you kind of look like a nurse and you're wearing like shorts you look like a weird like a like a preppy beekeeper kind of that didn't want to wear the outfit

that just took it off but wants to keep the helmet on to be cool. He's going to fucking kill me. A bee, really? Like an NFL player in a no-contact practice with no shoulder pads on but a helmet. Just running around in a jersey. One of those things, I feel like. They have all sorts of shit at the plate. There's shin...

They're like a catcher, basically. For a ball that's coming off the ground, sack up. It's coming off. I could see the shin guards because it's a hard ball, the cricket ball. It's not like a baseball has a little bit of give. The cricket ball is hard as fuck. So if that thing hits you in the shin, that's going to hurt like a bastard. So good baseball players wear shin guards, too, in case you foul one off yourself.

So I get that. At least on one leg. Yeah. Yeah. They have gloves on. Big, giant, like, cooking elbow pads. Now, from the wrist to the shoulder. you foul one off yourself so i get that at least on one leg yeah yeah they have gloves on big giant like cooking elbow pads now like the from the wrist to the shoulder big barry bonds fucking elbow armor there yeah uh so he uh i i guess they said while he was playing he would play like

uh in between his games of like the the big important cricket teams the tournaments just like yeah the like the professional ranks he would play in like a bunch of like low level games too he said he played like basically like pickup games and like lower leagues and he'd be playing all week and then play the games also for the big teams which like was a very strange thing he'd be in uh i guess he was involved in a country club cricket at manly flats at one point they were talking about in one article i saw and it was like it was weird and then you know he would be against like minor league competition the next day he'd be in with the major guys and he would do fine uh he was apparently a really good player he was a big guy

you know of six foot three big you know sturdy stocky guy yeah uh who, you know, six foot three, big, you know, sturdy, stocky guy who was, you know, feared on the field or whatever the fuck you call it. Yeah. Is it the pitch like soccer? I don't fucking know. So, Jesus Christ. I think it sounds like the like water polo or like horse polo, like real polo. Like on a horse. It sounds like rich, rich, pompous dickhead sport.

I guess it is. Is it? I don't know. I don't know. That's horse it sounds like rich uh rich pompous dickhead sport i i guess it is is it i don't know i don't know that's what it sounds like a bunch of kids who country club was in there i've never heard a country club mixed into a football in south africa we don't know what that means that might be a cage in the woods for all we know it's out in the country and it's a club like we have no idea what that means in south africa in the country and it takes you better be carrying a club yeah to get here or you'll yeah or you're guarded by clubs yeah and make sure you can't leave uh they call wilmot uh maybe the best player the eastern cape uh has produced in these rural cricket leagues out there here uh they said that he uh he could be a little bit uh he could be a little bit crazy sometimes he could be a little bit like out there in terms of uh they said that he uh he could be a little bit uh he could be a little bit crazy sometimes he

could be a little bit like out there in terms of uh they said he was very technically good as a player uh one guy uh here a guy named barry smith who was a longtime administrator and was a player also he said quote i remember my old man playing against him a couple times for Alexandria. Dad always used to say, put a short third man in for Laurie because he liked to hit the ball airborne through the gully. So put a short third man. But why put a short guy if it's going airborne? He liked to hit the ball through the gully. I don't know if that's maybe. Maybe that's like hitting the ball up the middle.

And you could put a guy in like shallow center basically or maybe that's what you could do he's going higher than he is long is it good to catch the ball that's been hit are you supposed to try to do that or do you have to like catch it on a hop on like one bounce and then you throw it baseball they really like it when you catch it

in baseball but in cricket do you have to like catch it on a one bouncer is that the only way it works? Crowd seems to cheer in baseball. Oh, he won a gullery goo. He gullery gooed it. He didn't care. Wow, he caught it out of the air.

It's called the gullery goo if you catch it out of the air, and then it's not a thing anymore. Jesus Christ. And then you're disqualified, right? And they give you a card of some kind of some certain color. They give you a purple card and you have to leave, believe at that point is how that works right on the gallery goo on the gallery only on a gallery the purple is only for a gallery you know i bright or was that a i'm gonna look i'm gonna look at the rule book again because i i know the that's out of the

air is certainly a gallery go it's a gallery go that of the air is certainly a gullery go it's a gullery go that's what i mean if you if you now if it's a two hopper that's not good that's a whippity whack that's a different thing if it's a two hopper you have to do a complete other jimmy just backed away from this is bored it's never gonna catch on here you guys it's never happening now his name's like whippity whack fucking have any idea what we're talking about but we've just invented a

completely new game with our own rules. I'll watch this sport before I watch cricket. Whippity-whacks, gallery goons, and didgeridoo wicks. What was it? Cricket has brought tears to my eyes, man. I'm fucking crying. I can't even read my notes right now. How many sticky wickets did he have? Oh, Jesus, that's the problem. Those sticky wickets.

Those will get you a golden face mask. They do, big time. And then the greasy wickets, you don't even want to know about those. These slippery wickets. Those will get you a golden face mask. They do, big time. And then the greasy wickets, you don't even want to know about those. These slippery wickets. So he said that his dad, this guy's dad said, Laurie would like to hit the ball airborne through the gully. And Laurie apparently told this guy, quote, Laurie apparently told the Alexandra captain that he should have listened to my old man's advice

because he knew it was a weakness. So his weakness was he liked to hit the ball to the gully. Airborne to the gully. That's a weakness, apparently. So I guess they can put the shift on. It's like a left-handed batter that loves to pull it into short right field. And they swing the third baseman. It's like playing 500 when you're in high school.

They just throw the ball in the air. They put the second baseman behind the first baseman to shortstop over. Nobody's at third baseman. It's like playing 500 when you're in high school. They throw the ball in the air. They put the second baseman behind the first baseman to shortstop over. Nobody's at third. Nobody. Nobody. So 1970, okay, and this is when politics starts affecting the South African, not only the athletes, but kind of their economy and everything like that. Because after this, when the world kind of starts to see what's going on there and other people other countries have you know we signed the civil

rights act you know here in the 60s and then we were by 70 we were like but what they're doing over there is terrible right guys people are checking their watches like wasn't it just by okay fuck day what time is it but it's very weird so i'm still taking down uh water fountains what are we doing what are we doing what's happening who are we judging for what i'm still taking signs off of water fountains this isn't great and we're judging them but uh all through this took a crowbar and probably the sign off that had the word colored yeah so how about we all just uh not take it down a notch yeah let's hope they just come around. But they didn't come around. And so like a lot of like they would offer people like sports teams and things money

to tour through there because they couldn't get people to come down there. South Africa is kind of remote. I mean, it's all the fuck down there. So you have to it costs money to get people down there. It's like they hire in Dubai. They hire comedians and world-class chefs for millions of dollars to go there for two days and dick off just because they can't get anyone to go

there otherwise. But also, South Africa is last stop for sunshine before you get to Antarctica. Yeah, that's true, too. Is that just the Arctic? What is that? Yeah, it's all the way at the bottom. I don't know which one's on which pole. It's the last stop for sunshine is basically it. For? Yeah, it's all the way at the bottom. I don't know which one's on which pole. If you keep going, it's way down there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's the last stop for sunshine is basically it.

For fucking something, yeah. No, it's weird, but people stopped going there. Rock bands stopped taking gigs there. It was not considered a cool thing to do to take a gig in South Africa. It wasn't. If you took a gig in South Africa, it would be like, you know. You're contributing to the delinquency. Yeah, it would be like if you made a gig in South Africa, it would be like, you know, you're contributing to the delinquency. Yeah.

It would be like if you made a gay slur on Twitter nowadays, like it would have the same reaction to it. That's that's the level. I'm sure the level of outrage that people would have had is the same as that in the in the 80s. That's a great one. Yeah. It's true. I remember like the Van Halen book. The guy was talking about how they the manager wrote that book and he was talking about how somebody offered him a bunch of money to do a show and and in south africa they were like

you know we can't fucking do that it's not happening yeah or van halen i want to say they ended up doing some kind of private thing or something there but they wouldn't do like what was one promoted show i i believe i don't know if they ended up doing it eventually or not i can't remember but uh at first they were like, dude, obviously we can't fucking do that. Not good. Apparently here, Laurie is selected to tour England on a cricket outing in 1970. But the trip is canceled for political reasons because nobody wants South Africa to be a part of shit at this point. So it becomes one of those things where, yeah, people are saying as long as apartheid goes on,

basically you guys can be... We're not going to support shit that you do. Yeah, you guys can be isolationists, and that's kind of the way it went. And there were some countries that don't give a shit that were supporting them, but, you know, countries that... Western countries weren't,

and European countries weren't okay with that. Come on through. They didn't give a shit. Whatever. Who cares? Do you cut head off in street? No. Oh, very nice.

I bring whole family. Can the pussy argue? And do you have water park? Oh, very good. They don't give a fuck. It's just like, whatever. It's better than Uzbekistan or fucking Tajikistan

or some place that the CIA takes people to under the radar. Some stand that used to be russia exactly some uh some uh soviet satellite so uh he's he's denied that and he never gets another chance because he's gonna play right up until the end of apartheid so he never really gets another chance uh in 1971 72 the eastern province team here won the uh g-Nissan Cup, which I guess was a big deal. Hell yeah. I don't know what that is, but it's important.

Peyton Sentras and Razor cartridges. Everybody gets a fucking Sentra. That's how it works. Probably a Stanza back then. I was going to say, everybody gets an 88 Stanza. That's what you get. I remember that from Hollywood Squares. They were always the worst

fucking cars ever yeah terrible every car that they the shadow the nissan pulsar remember those with the like dots on the taillights that were like sideways trying to make it look like kind of fucking 80s cool every car they had on on hollywood squares was the worst car on the road price is right those cars jesus it's a 75 amc pacer and they were always bottom rung oh yeah no options nothing no yeah it's just a piece of shit for four grand it's all good yeah they say the retail price i'm like that's cheap for a car very affordable 8200 bucks that's not a lot for a four-door. That's a family car.

Wow. Okay, so 72-73. This is when something happens that's apparently the biggest deal of his career. It's all everybody talks about, and I have no idea what the fuck it is. Awesome. So I have a lot of information on it, and I don't understand. You have to know the rules of cricket to understand this, and obviously we don't. So let's dive right in. Clearly.

He was the captain of Eastern Province, and they were at Bulawayo during the 72-73 Curry Cup. And I guess there was a walkout. Now, not in terms of like all the kids say we're going to leave after second period i think it's a no no no this is with the team uh now okay this is what a man wrote from like a newspaper back in the day here uh he said laurie wilmot committed the most dastardly act i have witnessed on the cricket field okay dastardly yeah that's big shit over there if you if that's said with a with any form of an english accent that means a lot yeah a lot uh it says quote uh they were at the the uh queen's sports club in

bulawayo uh here and it was the curry cup uh fixture i don't know what that is between rodigas game between rhodesia and eastern province okay this is for the curry cup this is for all the curry all of it the red the green the yellow yellow yeah all of it is it red curry i think i do not eat curry i know there's yellow because it looks terrible i can't eat everybody loves it i've tried it it is vile i won't i won't eat it i'm out i can't i get sick i don't need anything that looks like uh that looks like it was projectile vomited from an alien it looks like it was it was just pushed out of a body it doesn't matter which side i won't eat guacamole either so i just can't eat anything that looks like that i can't it looks like it was just farted out of a fucking tube meanwhile i love guacamole i can't get enough of it unless it's extra i'm out if i

can make it at home i'm good it's like and it has no taste no taste doesn't fucking taste like anything yeah you gotta put shit in it if i see it yeah oh boy i don't want like if it's snuck in something i don't care fine whatever but i don't want to look at it i don't like guacamole when it's like pureed into like a damn near baby food where it can like squeeze out of a tube i don't want that i want it like i have to scoop it and it has to be chunky fuck yes i don't know if i don't i want to be able to scoop it with a chip i don't want it to run off of my chip if it runs off my chip you can you can put that in the trash where it belongs or run it back through the fucking garbage disposal it's clearly where you got it

it's on a chip it's green and i can see it right Ah, it sounds great. Tomatoes in it. Apparently, here in this game, okay, Wilmot was the captain, acting captain, and had set Rhodesia more than 300 to win, it says. Okay, this is the sentence. Wilmot, province's acting captain, had set Rhodesia more than 300 to win. I don't know. That sounds like he bet on the game,

but I know that's not what they're talking about. Yeah, that makes more sense 300 to win. I don't know. That sounds like he bet on the game, but I know that's not what they're talking about. Yeah. That makes more sense because if that means that they are picked to score 300 points, that's not a sport. It's like an over-under. That's not a sport anymore. No, that's a lot. If you can score that many points, your sport sucks.

Fix it. Fix that shit. I don't know what that means. It says, Rhodesia battled superb. By the way, we do ask that you find our ignorance charming we're not going into the saying we know a fucking thing about cricket or we're gonna we've we've figured it out we don't know shit uh we're here to make fun of the whole thing so you don't like it fuck off i don't know what to tell you that's the show we make fun of every fucking sport there is even the ones we like uh this one just is the most ridiculous one we

found and we may have accidentally stumbled on the best way to fix one of our sports with football with the error. That sounds fucking... I've been thinking about that since that. That's been bandied about for 30, 40 years. Because quarterbacks have been pissed off about that. I can't be more on board with that. Because the quarterbacks look at it as their contract going on.

Yeah, that's somebody's money that you're fucking... Like, hey, those aren't my stats. That's not fair. Yeah, so it's one of those deals here uh so uh it says rhodesia battled superbly and it was obvious it would be the tightest of finishes yeah okay uh in in those days 20 overs had to be bold in the final hour okay 20 had to be bold in the final hour and the last of those 20 arrived when rodigia needed six to win there's six again and three wickets in hand oh and mike proctor and patty clift at the crease what the fuck does okay this is a sentence there's no periods in here okay

i'm gonna read this exactly as it's right you did have to clarify that part this is one no okay no periods there's a couple of commas but no periods in those days 20 overs had to be bowled in the final hour and the last of those 20 arrived with rodigia's with rodigia needing six to win and with three wickets in hand and mike proctor and patty clift at the crease okay okay so they're on deck they're setting it up yeah okay well that made more sense that time mike proctor and Patty Clift at the crease. Okay. So they're on deck. They're setting it up. Yeah, okay. That made more sense that time. Mike Proctor, Patty Clift.

Still got them to go. They're in the crease, I guess, which is a protected area on the side where you're in a creased area where they can't get to you. And it's like a soundproof booth. There could be money swirling around in it in the wind. We're not sure. So you're over there, okay? They need six to win and with three wickets in hand yeah and these guys over in the crease yeah it's a fucking done deal crap shoot no they're gonna win is that what it is i think it's over i think the base is

loaded there's no outs and it's a fucking three oh count to the guy at the plate at some point someone's gonna fucking score i think that's what they're getting at here. Sounds to me like it is a nail-biter of a situation where you only need six points, but one swing gets you six points. And there's three wickets in hand? One more wicket, game over. But we got two of the best. Listen, Patty Clift is in the crease, Jimmy. I'm telling you, he's going to do a rompily-roo like you've never fucking seen before,

and he's going to get a 200 on the sixth that's going to go 180 meters. You bet your ass. He's going to have eight wickets in hand when he's done. He's going to round the bases or the, I don't know what they're called there, but rounding the bases, he's going to come home with eight. You have to roll. Oh, I see. It's a somersault.

Well, from one base, you go forward, and then you roll side to side on the other. That way, you have to switch up so you can get momentum third to home play that's the hard part that's what screws people it's a bitch that's what fucks people see when they have to do the backflip on the on the way home the backwards roll and they end up like eight feet away from oh shit i'm off i'm off i couldn't see my trajectory there's a solid slide and it's always close but and the whole time you're doing this, you have eight wickets in your hand. So that's a lot. You've got to carry those.

Yeah, carry all. You've got to collect them around the bases and bring them home, right? And give them to Paddy Clift, where he can throw them. Or he can't swing. Well, he's got to put them in the crease to protect them, right? Because that's where you go. That's a much more interesting sport. Our game is much better.

I'm sorry. That'll catch on faster. Someone write all this down and play this game and tell us how it works out, because I think it's pretty good. You can make up whatever rules in between you need to to move it along, but let us know how it goes. So apparently it says, at this point, Wilmot, our guy here, not our guy, but our guy for today, Laurie Wilmot, led his team off off the field claiming that 20 overs had been completed

and refused to continue so he just stopped and was like not not three outs it's over and they were like no there's only two chief and he's like nope we got the third out we're good i think this is the equivalent of someone just being like no we got the third out and running into the dugout and having the whole team and the ump go and uh you only have two down they went no no you missed it yeah well you completely missed it we had it all in there there was a there was a wrongly rue there was all sorts of shit going on you you were fucking around you were scratching your ass ump i don't know what to tell you so he refused to continue yeah now and you didn't score the chippy chop so what the fuck do you want what do you want from me we're going home that's what happens so in accordance this is what this says not in the court not this is not my

understanding this is word for word okay in accordance with the laws of the game the umpires they are umpires awarded the match to rhodesia only for this decision to be astoundingly overturned by the South African authorities and the match declared a draw. This arbitrary decision cost Rhodesia what would have been their only Curry Cup title. The poor Ridgebacks. The poor Rhodesian Ridgebacks. That's their nickname. Wilmot apparently, quote, Wilmot wasted much time setting his field for the last over before the final hour in the belief that this over would be counted from the time his team was ready rather than the fact that the umpires were in position as stipulated by the laws. This is some technical cricket shit.

I still can't get over the fact. I just remember that these people play this game for like three fucking days. you oh yeah final hour i was like the oh they're going on people sit what a shit measurement it's like it's like an alcoholic's fucking keg party this shit goes on for days days uh and then it says his walk off was totally without warning and against both the spirit and the laws of the game so apparently apparently, Rhodesia was about to win. Like I said, 3-0 count, fucking bases loaded, tie game, or you're up by one or something, whatever the fuck you want to say it. And he just went, all right, we got three and walked off the field.

And they were like, no, motherfucker, you dicked around, you fucked off. You took time having a conference with the third baseman, and your pitching coach came in, and then you just left. Like, why did you do all that if you were just going to leave we were looking at the clock all those hours are gone now yeah so apparently this i mean i'm talking for the next 40 years this is like people fucking hate him for this well yeah i mean ron artest has plenty of people that still loathe him for his dumb bullshit moves, so I get it. For going in the crowd? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, that's all you remember that fuck for. Yeah. Do you remember him for any great shot he ever hit? Okay. Fuck no. If he punched the right guy, I am totally up for that. Yeah.

If you throw a fucking drink on a 6'11", 260-pound man, expect to get the shit knocked out of you. Sure. That's the way the world should be. I agree. You shouldn't do that. Otherwise, that monster's going to kick the fuck out of you. Sure. That's the way the world should be. I agree. You shouldn't do that. Otherwise, that monster is going to kick the fuck out of you. He's a giant man.

Are you crazy? Are you out of your mind? The arrogance to think that because you're in the stand and you're a little shit bag accountant or something, and you spent $60 on a ticket that you can throw a fucking drink on a giant grown man and he's going to take that shit from you is astounding to me. The arrogance. Mind blowing. You've bought a ticket close enough within arm's throw of a water cup to be able to hit

that man. That's pretty fucking ballsy and you deserve to be drilled in the mouth. Yeah. Just because your friend's company gave him the tickets that night. You have the right to do that. No, you should. The whole section should have held him and while ron artest pounded the piss out of that guy i think he hit the wrong guy i think he did

that's a problem you can't that's why you can't just run his hands up and shook his head i wouldn't do that so i'm sorry but someone's in here but my point is just that if you're gonna go do that and and and and get gully and be wild at least do something in your career that outshines that moment like on the court too yeah because i don't i can't tell you a single shot that he hit that mattered to fuck no there's not a lot of good teams but that punch was pretty great but when you when you have a fight like that that's a melee in the crowd you're gonna be remembered be remembered for that. I think Jermaine O'Neal's punch was better on the dumpy fat fuck in the Detroit jersey that he clobbered in the face. My favorite is still Vernon Maxwell's. Got both of them beat.

That was pretty good. Just without warning, climbing 10 rows into the stands to beat the shit out of one particular man. One dude. I thought was really. He had enough. He had enough. Again, you know what at some point you're both human beings and you asked for a fight he obliged i always say this no arrest

it's yeah i don't care what the situation is if he was in a bar would you do that with him would you shout shit and heckle vernon maxwell in a bar no he's a six foot five man he come over and kick the shit out of you you wouldn't say shit to him in a bar and not that's the rule to live in your head would i say that to him in a bar no because he'd kill me okay never mind then his face looks dangerous he looks angry angry man always he was he had a criminal record as long as my fucking leg he's an angry angry man a dick at a fucking car window right on this put it right on the window so how you doing baby now so yeah that's what happened with that the big walkout yeah that was the thing and uh the

wickedy walk the wickedy walkout yeah that's how that works so uh it's 1973 they talk about uh this is the uh the big eddie barlow hit here this is in the gillette cup final between uh eastern and western province province here they say he hit a ball so far it soared off the over the boundary which i guess is the wall there bounced on the old stadium roof and landed on the adjacent golf course yeah apparently that's a big thing i believe that's a penalty in cricket no i don't know what it is yeah and he was ejected from that. You have to run the bases backwards, I believe, for that. We only had one ball, and you lost it.

You lost it, dickhead. Nice job. Now you have to pickle the beast. That's the problem. See, that's the part of the game. That's the hard part. You've got to hit it hard, but not too hard. Not too far.

Now you have to go talk to the black guy that used to play for the Yankees. That's what happens now. Taylor Swift is soaring high. Her every move captured in the news cycle and devoured by her devoted fans. She's broken billboard records and made Grammys history, not to mention becoming a billionaire in the process. But along the way, Taylor has had to wage war, first by taking on a very powerful, very famous manager, Scooter Braun,

and then by going up against the biggest live events company, Ticketmaster. Hi, I'm David Brown, the host of Wondery's show, Business Wars. We go deep into some of the biggest corporate rivalries of all time. And in our latest season, Taylor Swift will shake up not only the music business, but Hollywood and the NFL. Follow Business Wars wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. 1976 is the first time he announces his retirement. And he retires and comes back.

He's very michael jordan like because he was he renounces his retirement in 76 and he finally actually retires in 89 that's 13 years a long span of i think i'm done yeah that's a whole career worth of i think i'm done man maybe not that's a long time that's a lot uh so he received uh uh i guess he he was on in 76 they honored i guess it's an honor being on the south africans president's team yeah against the international wanderers which i guess is an international good team they play against yeah i guess uh there was a guy named greg chapel on that team who's like an australian guy who was really good apparently uh this was uh wilmot's 100th first class match and uh he he got a 117 okay he said says this in the article quote he marked the occasion with 117 against an attack which included aussies matt max walker and ashley

mallet yeah not ashley mallet she i I mean, Max Walker, I can see. I mean, he's a fucking, he's shit. You know what I mean? He scored 176? His Womplery Roo's fucking eat dicks, Max Walker. But Ashley Mallett, I'm sorry. But this was against the Wanderers, and they have that signature, like, bucket full of water, but it's just confetti.

It's confetti. Yeah, they do that on the side. It's a big deal. That counts for 150 points. If you can hit through that through that if the guy flinches that's 150 points if you can get the guy on the other team to flinch i believe that's part of it i believe that's 150 points they count that as a long home run i think that's how that works but i guess he and also english spinner derrick underwood yeah who you gotta watch out for derrick underwood obviously we all know about him underwear i mean the under jesus i we all know about him. The old underwear.

I mean, the under. Jesus, I had a poster of him up my old childhood. Derek Underwood. He's the spinner of my, you know, my favorite spinner. People go, who's your favorite spinner? Obviously, Underwood. Obviously, it's Underwood. It's Derek Underwood.

Jesus, it's, you know. Sorry, I was going to make a spinner's joke, but that'll go over everybody's head. Never mind. It's a shame, Dennis. It's just a shame. So March 28th, 1976 here, I found a Sydney newspaper article talking about the president's thing that we just talked about here. Now, apparently this was a source of a large controversy, this President's Cup team. a source of a large controversy, this President's Cup team.

The headline here says, The South African cricket selection farce continued today with the President's XI containing only one regular opening batsman of non-white origin. Apparently, they're saying it was all white people they're putting on here. They said that the second-string South African side, with their compulsory quota of non-white players still amassed 321 against the wanderers um jesus uh the selector eric rowan picked eight white players on the understanding that that three non-white players of a certain type would be presented a certain type that's weird the fuck does that mean non-white players of a certain type would be presented. A certain type? Yeah, that's weird. The fuck does that mean?

Non-white players of a certain type. That sounds, I hope that's the way they play. Yeah. And not just like, he's too, that one's too dark. I don't like them. I like the nice chocolate colored ones. What the fuck is that? Three white. I really hope that's not what it was.

Of like a certain hue or lighter. Yeah, I don't know if it's that or wow. Okay. I don't know what the fuck this is all about here. They said that a quote, an alleged non white opening batsman, David Francis, told skipper Lori Wilmot. He never opened the batting in his life. He never hit lead off at all and usually batted sixth or seventh, sixth or seventh here.

So they had to make up a lot to shoehorn in not having any black people. It was hard to do. They had to play people out of position and in places in the batting order they don't normally go just because they didn't want to have any black people in it or more than three of a certain type, I should say. I guess that's what it was i'm not sure here um it taught jesus christ i don't know what any of this fucking means uh uh first okay his first the first of three from australians off spinner ashley mallet landed on the roof of the main grand scan okay they're talking about that two were plundered from Phil Edmonds, and one each from Derek Underwood and Max Walker.

Plundered? They robbed them? I believe that's if the pitcher turns around to hit the rosin bag, and you run up from behind them and take the ball out of their hand. And then tag them. That means they're out, I believe. They're gone out of the game then. You've plundered them, and then you hold the ball up,

and then someone has to try to take it from you. Whoever can wrestle it from your hands is the new bowler. I believe that's how it works. It turns into a King of the Hill competition. The word blunder always involves rape to me. There's one way or another. Rape, and big things of gold, and eye patches, and stings are on fire. And that bat is fat.

Oh, it's a big one. So, Wilmot, it says here, is the first player to win the sponsors 100 rand about 100 dollars it says for a century in the wanderers four games i guess if you get a hundred you get they give you 100 bucks that's certainly a century that seems like it i don't know but i mean that's that's all going on in march of 76 in the sydney newspaper but it was hard to even read about these articles in here because the sales jimmy oh yeah i was so distracted by the sales you guys have asked people always ask where the hell the sales go well well here's the fucking sales we're not gonna have any idea and how much this shit is and it's all

australian products that's why i thought this would be fun the sales uh i found here oh boy this is a good one this is for a uh it says be entertained by hmv galaxy family size 53 centimeter screen color tv so jimmy google that if you could here you have the the uh ability to do that what that what do that. It's about a centimeter and a half, maybe three quarters for like an inch. So 53, you're looking at carry the one. Is it like a 36 inch? It's pretty close. I have no idea. I don't know.

But the brand is an HMV Galaxy. Oh, then you got to take into account that it may be a piece of shit. That's true, too. And the problem is, too, how many wickets is it holding in hand? That's a good point. That's the other thing. Can you trade? Is it a wicket situation?

Can you trade a certain amount of money? And I have three in-hand wickets, and I'll give you one witchery romp. I'll give you a witchery romp, and I just scored a century. So is it free now? This is a $599 TV. this is uh 599 australian african dollars this is sydney australia this is a sydney house so this is uh this is some other this is australian dollars it's australia this is australian newspaper we're talking about here a copy of uh finding nemo 2 there you go well if you're if you're in Sydney, Australia in March of 1976, this is a good deal, though.

$22.10 a month. And it says, have glamorous HMV quality color TV in your home now! Exclamation point. Galaxy Color TV has one more control than a black and white set. What the fuck? It says, quote, has slide controls for easy adjustment. Separate on-off switch allows controls to be left in the positions that you set well then big 17 centimeter diameter speaker for rich sound

uh gotta have that uh deluxe style timber veneer cabinetry so fake wood on the outside gotta have that and uh a 12 months warranty on parts and labor optional stand available for 25 now if that's not enough for you say you're not in the market for a TV, but you're in Australia in 1976 in March, you can go to Grace Brothers there and get yourself some clothes. It says here, fake fur is fun and fashionable too. It is. Exclamation point.

This long line jacket is priced at $40. It's a double-breasted belted style to keep you snug and warm and basic black brown or beige forty dollars i want it not bad also the non-stop pantsuit styled and easy care bonded at orlon bonded orlon whatever the fuck that is listen up hillary say it again this season's look tunicstyle jacket over pull-on pants in rust, navy, green, claret, or brown. Wow. 24 bucks. Ah, the 70s.

The sales, Jimmy. So fun. Get yourself a pantsuit. Get yourself a pantsuit. A fur jacket. And a 56-centimeter television. Enjoy. All that for about $663 before tax.

So after retiring in 1976, apparently it said that he went off and just kind of hung out where he was from and kind of hung out. They basically said he was off in the wilderness always but i don't know if he was like living in the woods or that was just his way of saying he kind of went out of the public eye uh whatever it is he said he was on a diet of pineapple to lose weight all he'd been eating is pineapple which good god the hole in your stomach that would fucking bore all day only acid the pineapple dye i love pineapple i love it it would eat a hole in your stomach you'd have to have something great with chicken great you have to have some bread or something to soak that shit up uh but he ends up coming back two years later apparently there was

a uh eastern province had a very young team and uh and in the seasons he was gone they were struggling so they said hey will you please come back and he said hey what the fuck why not so in 1980 he comes back and he plays five more years for Eastern Province. It doesn't look like they win anything or I don't know what the fuck he does. But in 1985, he goes to another team. It's a first class cricket team called Border. I don't know. It represents the border region is what it says.

I don't know the border of what? Is that north? I don't know. I guess that would be the ocean. Otherwise what it says. I don't know the border of what? Is that north? I don't know. I guess. That would be the ocean otherwise. Otherwise it's called the beach. Otherwise it's called the water. Yeah.

It's the fucking beach team. So I guess this team began playing in 1898. So it's an old team. All these teams are all from the 1800s. They're all like... Jesus. They just settled in 1852. They're all like National League baseball teams. they all started right around the same time uh apparently uh uh in 2004

later on it says that south africa introduced the franchise system in 2004 and this border team ended up merging with eastern province which is the team he used to play for but this is after he retired so it really doesn't fucking matter but it was the only thing i understood in cricket the entire thing i read he played for both of them yeah so i figured i would read the one i would explain the one thing i understood i thought maybe that would help you love mergers you really do i do your favorite i do i need to do it i need to fucking do it so uh uh this here uh the border was usually like one of the shittier teams. Apparently, they played 584 matches from 1897 to 2017. It doesn't seem like a lot of matches.

584. How many do you guys do? From when to when? For like 100 and fucking Jesus. 1897 to 2017. 120 years. Yeah, but it... They played 584 matches.

But it takes like 38 hours to play one fucking game. They have been stuck on match 585 since 2018. So they're working on it. They're working on it. They'll get there. I guess in all these matches, their record was 173 wins, 241 losses, and one tie, and 169 draws. Pretty solid record. So there's one.

Well, you lost a lot more than you won. Did they? Yeah, they won 173, lost 241. Oh, yeah, okay. And then they had 169 draws. That's not good. But one tie. What's the difference between a fucking tie and a draw?

How does that work? Is a draw like just it's the end of the time and it's a draw? Or we showed up and then we're like, everybody's's here but nobody feels like playing because we're tired from playing the last 86 hours of the other game maybe i don't know if a draw is like uh i draw is like uh like an old school wrestling house show match where they they went through 20 and it's just a draw like it's a jason fuller it's for you or is it or is it like nobody scored shit yeah zero zero it's a draw but if you guys everybody's high six six that's a tie 382 to 382 it's a tie i have no fucking idea here uh but border held the record for lowest aggregate score by a first class side in a match i guess

during a curry cup match uh in 1959 1960 they scored only 34 runs in the match 16 in the first inning and 18 in the second innings and then that was it apparently that's that's the least amount ever and that's too that seems like a lot i guess that would be like we could look at like basketball be like uh you know if the the fucking bulls scored 34 in a game it'd be bad probably yeah especially if they're used to scoring 300 it's not great so uh he played for border from 85 up until uh 89 and then it looks like he retired after that i don't know if he played any bush league shit or whatever but it looks like he retired now in his career he has 147 first class matches 34 list a matches which is like the b league list a is the

b step below step below i don't know uh he had in first class he had 7687 runs scored which seems like a lot that's fucking crazy that seems like a shitload does anybody in the majors nobody's touched anywhere near that is it 5 000 not even close no i think ricky henderson has jesus that's a good point because hits are fucking nobody's like 4200 so i mean bruns is way below that so it's half of that is it ted williams no it's pete rose pete rose god damn but ted williams is up there too with like no because he went to war twice he went went to war twice. Does he have three? Three what? 3,000?

3,000 hits? Yeah. I think Ted Williams finally got his 3,000th hit. No, he hit 406 in one year. Oh. But he has a very high... He has like a 340 lifetime average, Ted Williams. He's a fucking beast.

My point was just that nobody's ever scored that much. Yeah, yeah. That's crazy. You just don't know anything about Ted Williams. Yeah, I don't know that. All I know is tuna cans. That don't know anything about Ted Williams. Yeah, I don't know that. All I know is tuna cans. That's all I know about Ted Williams. His batting average was 32.02.

Is that like a 320? That like hitting 320? Like 32%? That seems low. I guess, right? Yeah. And his average in list A was only 24.03. Even lower.

He's like he's not even here. Seems like lower. He's like he's not even here. He seems like a bum. He seems like he's not even playing. Just fucking try, Lorraine. What are you doing? Hey, Lorraine, give it some effort. You're batting like a real Lorraine out there. Come on, Lorraine.

You can do it. Now, his 100 slash 50s. I don't know what that is, but there's a 100 slash 50s. He's got 12 slash 31 in first class and one slash two. I know what that is. there's a 100 power you know slash 50s uh he's got 12 slash 31 in first class and one slash two i know what that is in list a centuries and then half centuries okay well 22 and 31 or 12 and 30 or 50 something games okay yeah that's a good idea uh top score i like that top score uh in first class is 222 and top score in list a is 101 uh balls bold apparently he was bowling too yeah medium yeah uh balls bold uh 1669 yeah in in first class 248 in

list a wickets uh 18 wickets in first class and only five in list A. Okay. So in all those games, 147 matches, only 18 wickets. He did better in majors, too. How much? Yeah, but how many wickets? How many wickets do you get? And they're sticky. Yeah. You never know.

I haven't heard about sticky wickets yet this game. Not this game. Only regular wickets. And no, I've heard of wickets in hand, but I guess maybe they're in hand because they're sticky. Right. You want to let go. It's stuck to you.

Stick fucking wickets sticky. It's like let go. It's stuck to you. Fucking wickets sticky. It's like a boogie. Maybe that's it. By the time you get to the plate, you have to get rid of all the wickets. They stick the wickets to you, and then you have to try to pull them off your uniform and get them off your hands as you're running home. And if you can get them all off, then you win. His bowling average was 45.11.

That's a low bowling average. That's not great. He's a pro. that's not great i yeah you want like he's a pro he should be at least 220 something like that yeah something give him a couple pictures maybe he'll help uh his average in list a is 47.60 uh zero five wickets in an inning in both of them zero 10 wickets in a match uh his best bowling was 2-4, whatever the fuck that means, and then catches slash stumpings. Yeah. Now we're talking.

Fuck yeah. Full contact. That's catches, and then if you miss, they take your leg off below the knee, I believe. That's how it works there. And it's a stumping. Up, he missed. It's a stumping.

Sharia law. It wins every time. I believe it's a two-hopper. That's a wickery woo. mist. It's a stumping. Sharia law. It wins every time. I believe it's a two hopper. That's a wickery woo. I think you get that's when they stump you. And the crowd just chants woo. That's right. And after they stump you, someone comes and they plunder you also.

So you're plundered and stumped on your wickety wop. And that's how the thing works here. Wickety woo. Wickety woo. What did I say? Wickety wig. Get that wop out of here. Fuck, man.

So he retires. retires uh he is known as a much-loved local farmer and small-time businessman he's got farms uh uh for a while he was like a dairy farmer over all this time he had dairy farms and shit like that he's got a he's got a wife named pam he has two kids uh he's like kind of a respected like businessman in the area with his farms and all this type of shit uh after a while in the late by the 90s he starts running a paprika farm okay which that's where paprika comes from you ever think what is this little red shaky thing come from that's been in my cabinet for three years that i don't never finish the only time i use it is deviled eggs that's that's the it comes from his house okay that's where that's where they get it so i saw that and i was like oh wow paprika farm i guess that's how you'd have to grow them i don't know if they just thought of crushing the devil egg market oh

you can't make a deviled egg without our guy lorraine holds the keys to the deviled egg market that's the way it works man uh his wife pam uh worked for many years at graham college in grahamstown as a school secretary so they're known as kind of the i don't know if he's all american type all south african kind of fucking you know i don't know she works at the school. He's a retired, famous athlete with a bunch of wickets and 7,687 runs scored and more riggery roms than we know even what the fuck to how to classify. And on a paprika farm. Who doesn't dream as a young boy of getting all the dingery dongs that you want and then running a paprika farm?

It's one thing to get the hootily hops that you're desiring as a child and that you watch people on tv gap but then to do that and then run a paprika farm i feel like is really achieving too many dreams these are all like pokemon i don't know what the fuck is there a jiggly puff coming up beats the fuck out of me I don't know any of that shit so uh wow so him and Pam live on the paprika farm and everybody's happy

in retirement how do you get paprika is it I don't know I'd like to know I assume it's something that you grind don't tweet it at me

I will find it before you tell me yeah I'm assuming it's something like inside of a flower that you grind up gotta be I don't know it's a pod of some sort maybe it's like a tube like a flower that you grind up. I don't know.

It's a pod of some sort. It's like a tube. It comes out a little tube and you cut the end off and paprika pours out right into the little shaker. That would make it easy. That would make it so much easier than having to grind things and process it. Fucking machine. Chop all the tops off, dump all the paprika in and you're good. They come like pixie sticks.

I think that's how I have it. That's my picture. Sticking off the top of, like in swamps, they have those. The shoots? Yeah, it's all pixie sticks. Pixie sticks and paprika.

Paprika sticks, they call them. They're popular in some countries. They're popular in some countries, but it hasn't caught on with the kids in America yet. They prefer a sweet snack to a paprika-y snack. That weird, bitter, it's a weird spice.

What is that? Is that nothing or something? That's the best way to describe paprika. Is that nothing or something? Because it looks like something. It's red. It smells like something. But then I taste it.

It doesn't taste like anything. What is that? That is a very strange spice. Fucking decorative spice is that shit turns yellow red it does it's it's fucking it's funny because you never see like if you watch a show or like a chef is making a meal right he never includes paprika in the recipe in the meal and when there only if it's a garnish when there is some paprika paprika flavor in there there's zero measurement they're just like it doesn't matter i think white paprika might be different though i think white paprika might have flavor i believe if i'm not mistaken but the red shit is kind of just for decoration just put

it in yeah put it on there come on when we finish just like layer it it won't matter you won't taste it either way yeah because i've had it light or heavy on deviled eggs and tastes the same so i don't know was that nothing or something is that nothing or something i don't know so uh yeah so he's late 90s he's he's doing his thing here uh everything's looking great you know he's been retired for 10 years yeah having fun south african countryside fuck yeah doing his thing he's very well known around here he's known as a character and uh he goes into the pubs and hangs out and does his thing and uh then in november of 1998 uh he's arrested out of nowhere yeah this has never happened before and what he's arrested for white paprika is uh not is is not for uh spiking the paprika right as a matter of fact he is arrested for raping three girls under the age of 16 oh no

uh yeah uh three girls under the age of 16 at once unexpected i don't think at once that'd be really hard that's a lot that'd be hard to do you need an many extra arms i feel like that would be it's been done it's probably been done but man usually drugs you'd have to be super organized right to uh guns and drugs yeah it's yeah so uh three girls under the age of 16 all at different times and we find out how he does it and who uh they were these type of girls that he would pick up uh this wasn't uh't like he wasn't like coaching or anything like that. It's actually kind of worse. All of these girls at some point had worked on his farm. They were like one was 13 years old and worked on his farm.

So not only is he employing 13-year-olds on the farm, which seems weird and whatever. But then he's also going, well, if I work, she works for me. So I can have sex with her, too. Yes. Apparently, from after this is all after this all goes down and people kind of talk to everyone around there. It's a weird thing. This area is kind of a tight knit area where they don't really like to talk to strangers. If you bring up Lori Wilmot, they'll either tell you everything or tell you to go the fuck away and don't talk to them really one or the other you get like a small town

here the same thing it would be the same thing you go down south and ask about something or up north or wherever the fuck and ask about something either they'll tell you everything under the sun or they'll tell you i don't know shit go away they treat you like paprika it's either nothing or something or something god damn it just like paprika so So apparently he used to get in his pickup truck and cruise around the back roads looking for underprivileged young women that he could have sex with. Apparently he'd troll around these back roads and he would find young women. Usually that's what he liked. He was into the young girls and he would talk them into climbing into the bush with him and doing a little action.

And he would offer to pay them, of course, and he would pay them. So he was basically finding young, poor girls and making them prostitutes by offering them money and talking them into having sex with them for money uh uh sort of thing here uh apparently it's not a thing that they do he's just like making them do it he's yeah no they're not prostitutes to begin with but it's turning them that way yeah they're girls who are willing to work on the farm like these are people like this would be like if you went to someone went to home depot to pick some guys to help them. Help them put a bathtub in. Fucking put a bathtub in. And then you rape them. And then raped them.

This would be super, very, very strange day. What a terrible Sunday. That's a bad Sunday. Starts out in a Home Depot parking lot and ends up with rape. Those are two worse things that could happen to you. So apparently... Dropped back off at a Home Depot parking lot depot back there so he was famous for this though around there like everybody knew he was doing it all the all the like yeah it was like a it was

like a joke like oh yeah he's going to look for some girls in the back roads again they said that uh his whole thing was he would roll down his window and hoot at the girls for some reason. He would hoot at them. And everybody called him Tootie because he would hoot at these girls. He did this so much that everyone in town called him this nickname because he was the guy who was sticking his head out of the pickup truck window to hoot at fucking underage girls. Creepy as shit. He's the original honky. Yeah. It's gross. Fucking gross. it's it's gross fucking gross um yeah it's it's it's

absolutely gross and everybody around there was like he got arrested and everyone was like oh yeah he's always doing going out there and that shit was illegal yeah it was just like everyone knew he was doing it but nobody really had any you know they weren't going to fucking stop him stop him nobody was like hey somebody keep an eye on him call the cops it was just like hey tootie isn't he funny that's funny he goes around and tries to pick up 13 year olds with offers of money for sex that's it's funny right how did this be found out then that's really good police oh well it's uh we'll get to that uh the uh young girl okay one of the young girls came forward, and that starts a big thing.

So now he's arrested, and like we said, now he goes from being Mr. Squeaky Clean Paprika Man and his wife being the secretary at the school and all this and Mr. National Hero and everything to the sleazy guy who shouts out a pickup truck window at young girls, which is fucking gross. His wife files for divorce pretty quickly. So everybody else knew, but not her.

Not her. She apparently didn't know. She just found out. She found out now. Once you get arrested for it, and it's not one, it's three. Three is a lot. Because one, I mean, he could probably, who knows if he's a con artist, he could talk his wife into, oh, you know, it's this girl, and she worked for me, and I don't know what's

wrong with her. She's crazy, blah, blah, blah. Might be able to talk somebody into that. Three is like, ooh, boy, three's a lot. Three's a lot. That's a lot of girls coming. Three underage girls, a lot of fucking girls to come forward. Oh, it's fucking bad.

So now he's completely fucked. All three underage. All three underage. Oh, yeah, they're all under 16. Oh, Jesus. Yeah, it's gross. So now he's completely fucked because now everybody knows this about him and he's out on bail and uh his wife has left him and uh you know

kids are gone they're grown up by this point so he is stuck at his fucking house people will not associate with him at this point also because now well yeah in a small town if you're the guy who you know diddled three underage kids it tends to put a stigma on you you know it's not like a big city where you could just blend in and be fine this is a small area where everyone fucking knows him deviled eggs going yellow going yeah no paprika anywhere yeah it's a paprika shortage right if during this time you experienced a lack of paprika in your spice cabinet now you know this is why this guy's horny fucking shitty old dick made your deviled eggs not festive as they should be

you made your aunt make a comment thanksgiving where she went they're just not the same where's the paprika on they just look kind of plain you went they taste the same i'm not the one who fucked a 13 year old okay all right aunt sally fucking twat yeah you know it doesn't even taste like anything just eat it why is aunt sally a twat because she is she is she's bitching about the paprika only a fucking twat would bitch about the paprika still a deviled egg so now he has problems at one point he has problems at his house that he can't get anyone to even fix because they won't associate with him so he's sitting at his house at one point his fucking plumbing goes completely bad because he owns like a farmhouse and he can't

get anyone to come fix it all right which is imagine that you have no i mean you know associate they're still yeah they don't want any they don't want any part of him. They don't want to go to his house. Right. Except for one guy. And it's Paul Calhoun, shit pipe enthusiast. I got you good there. What's on board? And he says.

Hey, guy, how is it you come to arrive here you fucking asshole huh look at this play your shit pipes i gotta tell you i've been looking around i've been a lot of old houses these are the worst shit pipes i've ever seen in my fucking life look at you it's clogged with 13 year old fucking girls you asshole what do you want from me what are these geranimals you can't flush these fuck you can't you can't no you can't flush the. What the fuck? You can't. You can't. No, you can't flush the feety pajamas that you tore off. That's not going to work. Look at this fucking asshole.

No. You know what I'd like to do? I'd like to backhand you. I'd like to clean your shit pipes and smack your wife. But your wife fucking left you because you're an asshole who fucks 13-year-old girls. So she ain't even here to get a good backhand from me. So what the fuck am I even here for? You take your shit shit pipe shove them right

up your fucking ass and i don't know maybe you could hire a 13 year old to come clean them out for you because i ain't doing it fuck you have a good one hey have a good one i gave him the goodbye poof and in a in a in a cloud of pvc and shit uh he's gone and laurie is very very upset i'm the asshole and you're the asshole. There was nothing wrong with this plumbing. I just made it up. I had to get there. I don't know how else to get Paul Calhoun to South Africa.

I was certainly on board. Don't worry. I had Vince McMahon in the car, too. I had them all. He was ready to burst in and go, I don't know. I was on board as Paul Calhoun on an American Airlines. He's doing it. He's flying over there with his plunger. He's sticking out of his carry-on bag. I don't trust him to checkhoun on an American Airlines. He's doing it. He's flying over there with his plunger on his skin, sticking out of his carry-on bag. I don't trust him to check it.

It's my good one. I'm not checking shit. See, that's my father's initials carved into that. He handed that one down to me. It's an old one. It's a good one. It's an old one. It works great.

Don't build them like this anymore. Don't make them like this no more. Go to Home Depot and get one like this. What the fuck is wrong with you people? What a disaster. So there is a trial for him. This goes to trial. It's a very public.

He doesn't believe. No, he denies, denies, denies. And his arguments are interesting here his counsel uh here argued that uh the 13 year old girl did not identify laurie wilmot as the man who raped her he didn't she didn't say laurie wilmot raped me because she doesn't know that's his fucking name she called him toady she said toady raped me oh she did she did she said it's toady the guy in that truck and everyone knows he's toady the guy in that fucking truck it's not a big mystery and wrangling up all the guy in that truck, and everyone knows he's Tootie, the guy in that fucking truck. It's not a big mystery. And they're wrangling up all the girls from that TV show.

Yeah. Where's Tootie? So Kim Fields is coming in there, and she doesn't understand. Why have I been subpoenaed? She's very, very, very unsure of what's going on. And Blair's just gotten a legal marriage here. That's it. She couldn't give a fuck.

And the other one, who's Joe? Blair with Joe. Joe. Joe was the one. Joe, she's got a a lifetime movie to film. She was in every lifetime movie for 30 years. Blair was the pretty one. Yeah.

Yeah. The blonde one. Yeah. Whatever. She wasn't pretty. No, she was blonde. I would like to see the Valerie Bertinelli versus Joe from Facts of Life death match that went on at Lifetime for the different roles.

I feel like they just every script that came in, they threw it on the floor and those two had to die for it like the opening of an XFL game to wrestle for the ball back in the day. They broke a pool cue in half and threw half in. That was it and they had to fight to the death. I'm doing the one where my husband's a pilot and he kills me

and then flies away. I'm doing that one. You can't have it. She's bleeding out my mother tries to get him extradited from thailand that's mine so take that valerie fucking asshole so uh yeah she returned uh uh she referred to him as tootie uh she testified that tootie was a white man who had stopped on the side of the road in a white azuzu backy i guess that's the pickup truck gross b.a. white azuzu bukkake and terrible especially in this scenario and uh and gave her a ride apparently he stopped and said do you need a ride and she said okay sure

and then i guess he later stopped and uh went out in the bushes and raped her. And then he gave her money. I guess he stopped, pulled over in the bushes and raped her inside the truck and then gave her money. And like did a Sonny Corleone, like after he broke the camera and he fucking, yeah, cleaned himself up there. And then threw her out? That was the end of the ride.

God, Jesus. So terrible fucking, yeah. So scummy. 13 years old, this girl. You never can, you never say. There's no coming back from that. No, and a 13-year-old isn't like, it's not like she was 16 and he's gone. She said she was 23, and I kind of believed her.

She's 13. She's got a Thor the Explorer backpack. 13's a child, period. She can't afford a Thor the Explorer backpack, this poor woman. Really? Oh, no. No, these are really poor kids these are he's going around the back country looking for like fuck these are basically girls that are wandering around looking for farm work they have nothing and he's going around years off her feet yeah he's going on around raping and then throwing some money on top of her and now when they had the trial they had this girl up there who was 14 years old at the time on trial for days of cross-examination the way a trial goes

there is not the way a trial goes here here if you got a 14 year old rape victim on the stand you wouldn't even ask her a fucking question right you wouldn't say shit you'd say next witness i have no a defense attorney wouldn't know because there's no way you have to be so positive about that nothing no matter what you do you're going to look to the jury like you're attacking a child who's saying they got raped and that's never going to fucking look good for you or your client you look like a henchman for your client who sent you to harass this person so it doesn't look good over there apparently you can just fucking completely uh grill a 14 year old

for days and that doesn't go against you at all uh uh yeah she said she was you know uh raped by him the cross-examine went on for uh three days cross-examination uh she was assisted apparently by the the young girl had a social worker with her and a court appointed child intermediary also so like kind of to help her get through the whole thing they didn't just throw her in a room and we're like here you're 14 figure it out i don't know she had two sleeps to deal with this yeah i mean like you have to do this go home go to bed yeah do it again go home go to bed and then come back that's That's too much. It's terrible. It's worse than the rape.

In America, you would never have a, especially a child, ever. They wouldn't even fucking, they would not have any, maybe a question of clarification of, did you say you went to your friend's house and then went here? Okay, no further questions. Okay, get off the stand. That'd be it. It would never be like, now tell me this.

You would never do that in America. It wouldn't work out in the stand. That'd be it. It would never be like, now tell me this. You would never do that in America. Just it wouldn't work out in the U.S. So the next after this here, they said that his attorneys tried to say that she was untruthful. She's a liar. And that she has they tried to say they could never find one. But they tried to say she had a record of untruthfully accusing people of rape. I don't know when she would start this because she's 13. So I don't know when she would.

How much rape is she? That's what I'm saying. So that they could never find anything that made any that made that stick that that charge. But that was their way of she does this all the time. So it was one of those, which is fucking despicable here uh apparently uh they said that uh after this they tried to say after this case with wilmot that she had made two other separate claims of rape also there but then they couldn't substantiate it but so if she's a a poor yeah lower, she might be. Yeah, she might.

Maybe she's been raped. She might be getting especially predators have a sixth sense. They sniff out victims and they know who the victims are. Why are we discounting the fact that the possibility of this girl's maybe been raped three times? There's a reason why the same people get abused over and over. Like predators have a sixth sense. They absolutely know who to fuck with. They know it.

They don't fuck with that one. If you look, there'll be these goddamn little league coaches or whatever. They have a whole team full of kids. They know the weak one. They know the fucking one who's got problems. That sick gazelle is easy to find. They know it, man. That's what they are.

They're like sharks. It's weird, too. They don't even have him in a suit over there. They had him in a blue and white checkered shirt. I mean, all right. Not bad. I don't know. Put him in a, he's, it's weird too. They don't even have him in a suit over there. It's, he had him in a blue and white checkered shirt. I mean, I was like, all right, whatever. I don't know. Put him in a, put him a goddamn tie. No, I don't think so.

Maybe though. You never know. Uh, uh, so they said he looked healthy and relaxed during the whole proceedings. Uh, three other girls testified that they'd also been picked up by Tootie and uh and he had fondled or had sex with him uh they had he'd fondled them and had and had sex with him uh before he paid them uh once uh once said the two girls had quote explicitly established that Tootie was a nickname for Wilmot which was that's what they were trying to do. They were establishing that he would pick up women and pay them for sex all the time. But that's from a voluntary level.

But they were just saying that a man named he's Tootie who drives around in a white Azuzu picking girls up and offering them money for sex. Got himself an M.O. That's his M.O. And so they got people up there to testify. And then this person saying, I didn't fucking agree to it. So that's the difference, because you can't just, you know you can't just do that can't just fucking do that uh yeah uh so that's it there also his uh his attorney argued that the description of a white

farmer named tootie who drove a white azusa backy uh could quote reasonably fit any number of persons in the grahamown district. I suppose. Nope, not every. Only one of them is called Tootie, though. That's the thing. Only one of them hoots out of their pickup truck window at Young Girls. There's only one Zubacki that's got voices coming out of it. That's what I mean.

That might be a common farm truck or something. There might be a bunch of white guys that drive Zubackis around. That might be a thing, or Baki, or whatever the fuck it is, but they're not named Tootie and they don't have a they're not known for picking up young girls for sex. So, you know, that sort of thing here. The judge found that the girl the judge found

that while the girl they'd never been asked to they never, I guess, there was a discrepancy of when she was asked to describe him. Was it before or after or something like that? But the judge rules that the identity has been established by the fact that she, along with multiple other people, identified him of the same characteristics. He's Tootie in this truck, blah, blah, blah. So that gets legally divorced.

Now, his divorce, or that gets legally whatever. Divorce is what I'm talking about next, because his wife divorces him. Like we talked about, she left him. Now the divorce comes through. This is during the trial. Apparently, during the trial, he lost his family farm, which had been in his family for years, generations here. Trying to pay his legal. Yeah.

And nobody wants his fucking paprika because it's tainted with fucking the tears of little girls. Yeah. They arrested him on his paprika farm. Oh, no. Yeah, I guess his wife divorced him there and his estate was sequestered because of the divorce where they couldn't fuck with it. And he ended up losing the farm and a bunch of other assets because he couldn't pay his bills because all of his shit was tied up with his wife and the divorce so he pretty much just everything went downhill in a very short fucking period now don't fuck kids that's hey don't fuck kids every one of these guys we've had who has fucked a kid it didn't work out well for them no it didn't they lost a lot remember buck zoom off dare to say everything yeah remember

buck zoom off 60 years the best was that he tried to run out of court while they were sentencing him he just said i'll just run away and they'll never catch me what if i just keep walking what if i just run out of here i don't have to stay for that i don't have to say i don't have to stand here and take this pray tell can you imagine i wish you would have said that i'm not standing for this i'm leaving i'm leaving goodbye i've had enough of this shit deputies tackle him and fucking forcibly cuff him jesus christ so march you are slandering my good come on this is fucking bullshit so march of 2000 is the verdict here. The verdict here, and he is found guilty of raping the one 13-year-old girl. The judge, Judge Froneman, said Wilmot is, quote, very fortunate to not be convicted of the two other rape charges of having sex with minors. The judge, a different magistrate who ruled over the other charges, he ruled that

the charges, uh, uh, work that the, the sex with the other two were, was consensual in nature and that the state hadn't proved that the girls were underage. How do you, how do you not, they're not old enough yet. And he had sex with them. They're still 15. Is there, did they not know their ages did they have sex like later and then came back in time to do this i don't know i i don't know man i don't know i don't know if they had to prove he knew they were underage or if they had to

prove they were underage i'm not sure about how the law works there but south africa get your shit together yeah uh two out of the three rape charges are dismissed though that's pretty good odds that's not bad but he is nailed on the one of a 13 year old which is not good uh he would like to be bail he would like bail uh while the before sentencing and they say fuck no are you shitting me sir hey tootie take a fucking hike we got a nice bench for you back there yeah there you go it's all yours pal uh pal. So, yeah, he is guilty. Denied bail. March 22nd, 2000. That was March 3rd, I think. March 22nd, 2000. The denial of bail is reversed and he is allowed bail. He's back on the streets and he's back on the streets. They let him out and he says he's starting a new business since his farm is gone. He's starting a transport business, and he's out on the street here. Now, keep in mind, this is March 22, 2000. Listen to how long he ends up staying out.

Now, this is overturning the judge's previous decision not to extend his bail for the sentencing, basically, is what this was. The judge said that this judge that lowered his bail said that he believed uh wilmot had a reasonable chance of success if he appealed the conviction so he's even saying in open court he thinks it's a weak case against him and gave him bail gross which is fucking gross the judge said the state had problems with conflicting evidence and faced an uphill battle proving that it linked uh wilmot to a 13 year old girl rape in 1998 they're saying i don't understand that it seems like this judge is convicted of rape

this yeah he's like i don't know they can't convict anybody around here i've been raping them for 30 years where i'm from that's just called a widgery womp i don't know what to tell you get you 10 points get you 10 cricket runs that is the most disgusting thing i've ever heard it really was i love it oh i love it so much dirty judges dirty judges so uh his lawyer here terry price he said that the state had run its case against wilmot, poorly and negligently failing to apply the most basic principles of criminal law procedure and evidence. So just it's it's a disgrace. Practically the OJ trial is they're saying here the state's case said that, like I said, the other two, they said the state's case was they tried to use the fact that he was acquitted of the other two as like against the the third girl who's convicted of like well i mean that he was acquitted of these other two i mean she's obviously a liar too it's one of those it's fucking crazy two of three are no-go

so let's just say the third isn't making a sweep here let's do that so uh now wilmot here uh old laurie says he is going to seek uh he is going to seek an appeal against the conviction after he's sentenced. He faces a sentence of 15 years unless he can provide the magistrate with compelling reasons why a lesser sentence should be imposed. He said in an affidavit this week that he was confident his appeal would succeed. The 13-year-old, now 14, who they they talked to says she still lives with the horror of the rape her mother says that she was pleased that he would been convicted though she said quote she still suffers from this terrible memory even now yeah because it's like a year later and she's a child so that'll happen yesterday and even if even if it was consensual as fuck having a 13 year old

having sex with a fucking 50 something year old creepy old farmer would traumatize her even if she thought she wanted to do it it would still be they're not old it's not old enough so yeah not great here uh uh he says they talked to lorry he's running a company that transports timber all over the eastern cape that's what he said he's doing that That's his transport company. He says in his affidavit, he's built up some assets since he's been,

all his shit was sequestered. And he requested that he be allowed to remain on bail pending sentencing and to keep his businesses going. So April of 2000 is sentencing. He is, this is the same judge here, the same magistrate who dismissed the two charges against the other two girls is this girl here and he says uh so make sure to say that you're

fortunate you weren't convicted and gives him a you sir yeah may fuck off uh 12 years in prison three of which are conditionally suspended what less time than she's even been on earth yep and three of which suspended nine years that's what you got wow nine fucking years so he's still appealing that though he doesn't think wow i got away with something he goes absolutely not that is so steep that's area are you kidding me for For that? Jesus Christ. I paid her. I threw a couple of 20s on her fucking belly. I don't understand what the problem is. So happy. And I gave her farm work.

Jesus Christ. So November 2000, he appeals. It's to the high court and a full bench of the whole court here confirmed both the conviction and the sentence in November of 2000. here confirmed both the conviction and the sentence in November of 2000. So then he went to the appeal court again, and he sought to have new evidence introduced. It's like our moves. Once your appeals are exhausted, you've got to have new evidence.

Is he out this whole time? Well, he's out this whole time on bail. What the fuck? This whole time on bail. He's out this whole time. The court at this point sets aside his conviction and his sentence and sends the matter back down to regional court to hear the new evidence they basically said whoa whoa whoa this whole thing's fucked up there's some new evidence let's let's bring this county sorted back to zero and you guys go now retry this with this new evidence we've had here. What? It's crazy. Now, evidence was introduced that by two women that this 13 year old had claimed that to

them that it wasn't Wilmot that raped her, but another man. These are two women who've never been involved with this case before. He just found them now and now they're witnesses for him. His defense attorney argued that the identity of the rapist had not been firmly established. He said the girl that, you know, the name Tootie could refer to any other white man. Like he said, he said that the state had failed. The state failed to ask for a lineup, apparently, in the beginning. That was the big thing of the identity.

And they said that that should have weakened the case. Now, the prosecutor said four other witnesses corroborated the girl's testimony that that's fucking tootie there's no other tootie in town ask anybody who tootie is and they'll all say that guy it's pretty fucking you know whatever uh also a rape victim fucking nose yeah they know they know it's that guy the guy and you go oh fuck everybody i don't need a line and that's tootie certainly my Tootie. Yeah. And Truck and everything else. Now, after this hearing, he declined comment or any of this shit here. He said he's working for a bus company and rebuilding his life right now.

He doesn't want any part of this shit. Obviously. I've moved on. I'm good now. Understand? I'm fine. I don't know why you keep bothering me about this. Sure, I raped a kid a few years ago. But Jesus you're gonna make a federal fucking kid how long is that gonna stay

out how long are we gonna talk about it yeah rape one kid it just sticks with you for three years even this is ridiculous like a husband who checked out a chick's ass in the yeah come on what are you doing i didn't fuck her ah what are you doing so then doing? So then these appeals are going back and forth. It's taken to the high court again on appeal because he's convicted again. High court. They kick it back down to the lower court. March 18th, 2003. The matter is, he's still out on bail.

Three years. Three years since he's been convicted and five years since the rape. He's still out. That hasn't served any fucking time. Barely. That's any fucking time, barely. That's ridiculous. So, yeah, the court here, he presents two new witnesses here, and the magistrate, the same one that sentenced him, said the new testimony was hopeless and a pack of lies. He also said he felt that the new witnesses were clearly compromised.

So he said, you fucking coerced these women into doing this. These are your friends, pal. They live next door to you. Both of these women, before he lost his farm, worked on his farm. And according to reports at the time, had been coerced into taking the stand. So he took a couple women that used to work for him and said, go up there and tell them I'm fucking fine. And I didn't rape anybody. There was an extra 20 in it. Yeah, that's literally what it was here. He took a couple of women that used to work for him and said, go up there and tell him I'm fucking fine. And I didn't rape anybody.

There's an extra 20 in it. Yeah, that's literally what it was here. Wilmot's counsel also argued about the young girl's credibility. You know, it was a little less than perfect there. I don't know. That's what they're saying. And after considering new evidence, the magistrate considered everything and took it all in and convicted him again fuck off again asshole okay uh 2003 this is may of 2003 uh uh which is ridiculous but they're trying to get his sentence reduced because they're they're saying that this whole thing has cost him everything

his marriage his farm his is you know he has nobody to rape now nobody how is he going to rape the papriksi sticks are all gone his azuzu's gone he has no paprika to lure these people in how's he going to do anything uh now uh they the judge said that nothing has changed in his view that the uh girl who accused him as has been a consistent incredible witness who didn't even change her story under multiple days of cross-examination. They said the only person who could have denied the evidence that he that they've the child that they've been that he raped her was Wilmot himself and he

chose not to testify. So it became her word against his and his wasn't there. So that's her work. If it's her if it's your word against somebody else's and that's all there is you got to stand up. You better fucking tell if it's DNA evidence shut the fuck up and let your lawyers do it if it's he said that he did this and no i didn't and that's all it is you get up there and you fucking be more credible than that other person

if that's what it is if you didn't rape a 13 year old you couldn't keep me in a fucking seat i'd be yelling it to at the window of the quiet and rape this 13 year old everybody that could fucking hear it duct tape my sock through my mouth i'm gonna be screaming uh forget it so he says quote the judge here clearly the two witnesses gave evidence that was fabricated with the intention to save their former employee you sir they keep fucking off yeah sort of uh his sentence though is reduced to nine years in prison with two years suspended seven now uh so now it's seven years two years suspended for five years i don't know what that means so that i guess that's two years suspended if something happens within that five years they tackle it so basically he's doing seven but do

five and then you'll only have to do two more it's yeah it's ridiculous here jail math is crazy yeah it's you really gotta go at it it's like it's like the common core shit you have to figure it out from a different angle so uh you gotta draw circles and shit yeah so they said that he will appeal again damn it he will be appealing uh he said he can't you know this is ridiculous uh now uh they do extend his bail after they say that uh he needs time to prepare an argument for mitigation of sentence. And he gave he said he doesn't know what he's going to do. Wilmot said that, you know, he's going to keep living his life.

He's going to try to rebuild his life and he may do another appeal route. He doesn't know, but he's starting to get down on himself, thinking that he's probably going to end up in prison now because he's been sentenced multiple times. But he keeps going down. Yeah, he's got a point. And he's he's probably going to end up in prison now because he's been sentenced multiple times but he keeps going down yeah he's got a point and he's he's older he could appeal this till he's 90 and just eventually get no prison time but instead on march 1st 2004 he fucking shoots himself he gave up he gave up he's fucking i'm done boom unbelievable uh done yes an inspector for the for the police uh for the grahamstown area and the eastern cape there said that wilmot took his own life on a sunday evening by shooting himself uh he was found by a neighbor with a suicide note nearby no doubts no foul play

suspected at all he fucking or that 13 year old got somebody really good really good which i i really hope that happened that would be great but i think i think he was just the pressure did it yeah he had nothing everything was gone everybody thought he was a piece of shit he was going to prison uh where an older man who uh would probably not be treated well for what he did in there africa not good stuff uh he had a rough time coming up ahead of him and he fucking deserved it fuck this guy yeah uh no fouls play suspected and they conducted a full inquest and found no foul play and it was definitely a suicide uh a friend of his that's been working in that business with him the bus thing or the transport shit said that wilmot had been experiencing some personal problems recently

uh and all which yeah no shit like having to go to prison right and also there was rumors of him having an incurable disease the pedophilia that's what that disease either fuck cancer yeah anything else apparently that was there too where that's a rumor that was going around that he had an incurable disease uh now his his wife at that point, his ex-wife, she described what she called as, quote, pathetic sympathy she received on her husband's death here. She said it was a mixture of compassion, distaste, and tangible relief is the way she put it. So people were like, you know, we feel bad for you, but fuck him and we're kind of happy he's dead. Aren't you glad you washed your hands of him? I mean, you washed your hands yeah i mean you washed your hands him he washed his hands of himself high five sugar she sold right before the market crashed she is ken lay she was fucking boom it was like 07 like

march of 07 and she's like i'm dumping all my real estate right now six months later smartest person in the world sticking around any longer uh yeah so uh one of these these people that's fantastic one of her acquaintances said that they felt that it was a lifting of a burden off of pam having this around her neck uh they say that pam was uh quite happy after that and going into the 2010s and everything she has a boat docked down on the coast sails the open sea as often as she can not trolling for 13 year old girls to have sex with 13 year olds in her wake i mean which is crazy because she really a lot happened to her and uh you know someone like that i feel bad for because she was she didn't fucking know

she's working at this school she thinks she's got this nice husband who's high profile she doesn't know he's going around fucking flagging down can't imagine girls and everything like that and what about the people who are fans of his they didn't fucking know and like all the local people who thought he was kind of a hero not to mention these 13 year old girls i feel bad for all these people jimmy all these people you're really good today i'm good today i'm on my segues are on point today but not nearly as much bad as i feel for well let's start out with if he used his real name okay anthony wilmot here anthony wilmot who is an o4 i don't know what rank that is or what job that is in the u.s air force uh e4 oh e04 right it's an e4 okay it's new it's early there you go well he's been promoted once.

Well, he also has the same name as a rapist. So I feel bad for you, Anthony Wilmot in the Air Force. Or maybe, hey, you know, he's more casual. He's Tony Wilmot. Found him, too. Director of Security at Belterra Casino Resort in Cincinnati, Ohio. Oh, poor fuck. Jesus Christ.

Or maybe he's going a little low-key. He's going by his middle name, Lorraine. So you'll find Lorraine Wilmot, who is the probation director at the Broome County probation in Binghamton, New York. And I'm a lady. Yeah. So you just say, fuck it. Where's Laurie Wilmot? Well, that depends on how you spell it.

L.A.U.R.I.E. That poor Laurie is going to be found when you look up the other laurie and she is a therapist at crc health group in bend oregon and then you look at her and you go i feel bad for her but then you think what about poor l-o-r-i laurie there's her too laurie was a restaurant manager at stone pepper's grill in pittsburgh pennsylvania which is insane and then finally you think but what about l-o-r-r-i-e lori and you find him in 2005 i found in the hartford current newspaper the excellence in patient care award went to lori wilmot of torrington who received the student american dental hygienist association foundation award and then was immediately had it pulled from his hands when they found out that he had the same name as a rapist that was incredible that was good I had

it it's not bad there not bad at all that is so many ways of fucking it's every way babe it's every way I had to prep some shit and there is one for all that's incredible everything man uh so his legacy here uh uh is people around here uh uh still you know remember him for what he was and then they remember him as a rapist uh apparently the uh uh basically the way they look at it down there is that they look at it as more of a more of a of the the way the racial shit works out than anything else the way this article puts it at this is put very well it says the story still stirs the imagination because there's something uh there seems something effortlessly eastern cape about it the idea that a man considered otherwise decent can use racial authority and

sexual power to do as he pleases with his employees, who at this point are pretty close to slaves there. I mean, they're being paid, but not much. It's not like there's no OSHA. Right, there's no money, and that's an enticement to keep working and keep quiet. Yeah, but they say people don't really want to talk about it around there, and it's just kind of brushed under the rug there. Nobody really wants to talk about it. People are kind of, you know,

just kind of pushing aside. One person is David Emsley, who is the chief executive of the Eastern Province Cricket. He grew up with Laurie in the village of Salem there. He said, quote, I've known him all my life.

He was a hugely respected cricketer and a larger than life character. And then they said, well, what about the rape? And he went, so can I i get you a pint i just didn't want to talk about it nobody wants to talk about that devil egg there's no paprika but you know it's still good it doesn't taste like anything anyway eat a yellow eat a yellow can't get enough oh boy tough shit because there's had plenty tough shit not a lot on him apparently rapists don't sell merch well no it's weird strange super weird buck zoom hoff too not a lot of buck zumhoff swag out there on the shelves i did actually find a buck

zumhoff t-shirt that's true that exists yeah and i will not buy it actually no no i'm not buying that fucking rapist t-shirt pedophile asshole so this guy even if there was stuff who cares fuck this guy no one's uh no one cares if you did like him i assume you stopped after the way so uh it doesn't matter there uh so that's laurie wilmot and that is south african cricket and uh i've never felt like i knew less about something than uh and and justified uh and i feel justified in it and i i'm gonna keep ignoring it uh based on this episode good idea it's messed up because like i'm doing this whole episode i'm like i don't understand i don't understand i don't understand and then i get to the rape and i'm

like this i understand this we've covered this i get like that's the sad part like okay rape trial i know how to cover a rape trial i know these stats i know these stats yeah these are good i know that sort of shit i know his dna stats right there but uh yeah that's that so uh if you like that show if you had fun uh listening to us talk about cricket and uh try to figure it out you can tell us very easily by going to itunes apple podcast whatever it is and giving us five stars uh it helps a lot tell us that we're following instructions following directions whatever it's not for our ego this five wickets it's all five sticky wickets it helps move us up the charts that's really all it does it helps push us up the charts so it's a business thing

so we appreciate everything you do for us there also go to shut up and give me murder.com uh right now and check out the tour dates because they're all up now uh tickets go on pre-sale on the 15th of may on full sale the 17th of may if you follow us on social media there's pre-sale on the 15th of May, on full sale the 17th of May. If you follow us on social media, there's pre-sale codes. Right. So you can get in there. Don't ask.

Don't even ask. Follow us on social media. Follow us and look for it on there. And look for it. See if it's posted. Because Sarah does our social media. She's diligent about posting shit like this. So just look before you ask.

Because otherwise we get 500 messages of, you know, this and we're sorry for ones that we're not going to yeah we're trying we try people we're doing our best there's also we're not done yet also this is like this little tour but there's more shit being booked after this we're looking at seattle we're looking at salt lake we're gonna get back to boston we are coming to portland we'll get back to portland we've loved portland we've been there twice and they sold out fucking immediately once and then a twice the size venue sold out again just as fast new york city's a great market we're not stupid we're not some san francisco oh jesus do you think i will fuck just to go to san francisco and james wants to retire there and break fucking even on the trip i'm happy as shit i'm like free vacation i love

it's my favorite city in the fucking world we're coming there god damn it you have you have everything you have ocean and seafood and legal weed it's my fucking dream and weather i love this hoodie weather that's james my god jesus i can't get enough of san francisco so we'll be in all these places and any place we don't get to we can't go everywhere we just can. We're not like a comic that tours the road all the time. They tour 40 weeks a year. So they can pretty much get to every market. We're doing like 20.

Because we have to do these shows. That's the thing. We have these shows. And then we have Vile Human Beings is going to be coming up. We have a lot of other stuff. Do you have kids? I have kids. We have two kids each.

We can't be on the road every weekend. We just can't. I like you guys, but I got to see them too. They'll be pissed. Not only that. We have to see our kids and can't be on the road every weekend. We just can't. I like you guys, but I've got to see them, too. They'll be pissed. Not only that. We have to see our kids, and we have to make these shows. Because if we're on the road 40 weeks a year, we won't have a show to take on the road, because we wouldn't be able to fucking do these twice a week.

So that's why. It's not because we don't like you. It's not because we don't want to come to Des Moines. I mean, we don't want to go to fucking Des Moines. We don't want to go to Omaha, either. No. We think we're fucking chomping at the bit to go to Omaha. Sorry, Omaha.

No offense. We've been in Cincinnati. Yeah. We've been there, damn it. We want to come see you guys who are in Omaha. So you guys are great. But the actual surroundings, it's flat and ugly and shitty. Sorry, we'd rather be in San Francisco as you would be from Omaha.

So it's no big deal. Or Des Moines. But anyway, we're coming everywhere we possibly can we really want to see you guys all joking aside we really want to see everybody and uh we're doing our best have a good time it takes it takes time and it takes a lot of effort and we're putting it all in and there's there's multiple factors you have to worry we have to worry about a uh availability and then does it fit into our routing because maybe we have a show in LA one weekend and then the only weekend Boston is available is that weekend well we show in la one weekend and then the only weekend boston

is available is that weekend well we're not gonna have la and boston the same weekend they're kind of far away from each other long fucking flight so that's the other thing and then it turns into routing and then it turns into well there's a challenge because someone else said all this shit that goes in the book can we get back in time to fucking put out a show and then can we get back in time to put out a show that's the other thing so all from a hotel room no there's like four different factors that all have to click in perfectly show. That's the other thing. So all from a hotel room. No, there's like four different factors that all have to click in perfectly. Like you're turning the keys to a submarine to launch

a missile, you know, it's for us to be able to take a date. And then we got Sarah Karen, the nuclear football. We have to do it. So if they don't all, if one of those things is out of place, we can't take the gig. And so that's what we have. So anyway, we can't wait to see you guys. If you want to this was a point of what we tried to say after we made fun of half of america

if you want to get these tickets uh do that at shut up and give me murder.com like i said follow us on social media you'll get the pre-codes and there'll be links to everything you'll get the pre-sale codes and then you don't have to ask any questions too it is uh at crime and sports on uh it's at crime and sports on uh on twitter and facebook and it's at small town murder on instagram and the small town murders uh twitter is at murder small so you can follow for those dates and it's at small town pod on facebook so do that uh now let's talk about our favorite goddamn people. Our producers. These people have been wonderful. They have gone to Patreon dot com slash crime and sports and they've made a donation or

they've gone to PayPal and used our email address, which is crime in sports at Gmail dot com. And they've made one time donations. They're just our favorite goddamn people and they keep the show afloat. And we just love them so much. So, Jimmy, let's do it. Hit me with them right now this week's executive producers are cheryl dodge leah gordon shannon russell uh ronald carl

williams the second not junior the second not a junior i promise uh avasa brita and gary howard and then uh happy mba to lee hey congrats he got himself an mba and we helped him with that well good for you lee congratulations man better don't even have a high school diploma yeah get out there and business manage some shit man no shit good for you uh julia holmes and her son chris edwards are also producers pierce de courcy uh ashley mchaffey uh mkippy24. That's a screen name. I doubt that's somebody's name. Colleen Stachowiak. That's ruined. Moving forward.

Aaron McSweeney. No, McSweeney or McSweeney. Kenneth Garrity. Katie Murphy. Allison Davis, Don Peterson, Megan Bassler, Courtney Devon, Grim Karen, which I'm jacked about. That's amazing.

Megan Bassler, Courtney Devon. I said that. which I'm jacked about. That's amazing. Megan Bassler, Courtney Devon. I said that. Gable. No, it's Gabe. Gabe Weeby. Gabe Weiby. Gabe Weeb.

Sure. That's all of them. Any possibility. Marla Happany, Tanya Marion, Robin Rosenfeld, Judith Keel, Ruby Perez,

or Roby. I think that's a U. I'm pretty sure. Mitchell Fisher, Delinda Andrews-Lewinge, or Lewinge? Lewinge. I think that's right. Lewinge, yeah. Pretty sure.

Kathleen Libby, Alyssa Katuwagno, damn it Matthew Wynalski this is the hardest fucking week ever I'm serious Kristen Buford Holly Sutton Joe Boyd Caitlin Gagnon

Nikki Dunn Jude Kendall Thomas Radio Yes that's how it's spelled I'm sure it's wrong but Radio Yes sounds good Radio Yes

New Morning Zoo Radio Yes sounds good. Radio Yes. New Morning Zoo. Radio Yes. Say yes to Morning Zoo. Tomorrow morning, all week long on Radio Yes 101.6. Corbin Van Leuven, Mariah Aguirre, or Aguirre, or Aguirre. Either one. There's so many.

Could be any of them. Benjamin Ryan, David, David Dammitz. David, yeah. Dammitz. That's a good one damn it uh rob east uh allison morris dick dick donovan charles burroughs uh cassie lewis uh eric barber dominic hooten uh simona simona ku uh kunavia kuniva simona i'm so sorry that's what i am um mackenzie rathkin or no rain rankin mckinnon mackenzie rankin uh amanda miles uh edward kaczynski uh keith and sandy stover megan's megan mcshiri she's in the uk i believe thank you megan you're a sweetheart uh pita uh peta peta marie uh karate anytime p-e-t-a i'm never gonna pronounce that yeah that's peta right it's probably peta PETA, PETA, PETA Marie Karate. Anytime PETA.

I'm never going to pronounce that PETA. That's PETA, right? It's probably PETA. It's not PETA, right? It could be PETA. It could be PETA. There's PETA. Don't look at me.

Nia Williams-Jones, Rosanna Robinson, Christina Doling, Kim Hodgkins, Hodgkiss, Melody Potter, Fletcher Wilkinson, Jen with no last name, Steve Valentine, no, Stephen Valentine, Susanna Larson, Jeremy Doran, Amy Schwartz, Brooke Hand or Hard? I think it's Hand. I'm sorry, Brooke. Either way, it's a dirty last name. Filthy. Hard or Hand. Allison Riley, Benedict Hutchinson Brooks, Michael Joseph, Valerie Ferguson, Brendan Doherty, Jinji Liu.

Asian names are always a brutal one for me. I can't get through it. I can't do it. I'll never figure it out. Andy Snow, Bertie, no, Brittie, Bridie, Cornyn, Cornyn, Sarah with no last name, Dustin Lang, Allison, no, Ashley Hardison, Dustin Lang and Ashley Hardison, Gemma Hawkins, Norman Sather, Rebecca Norse, Lindsay Greth, Brandy Morgan, Becca with no last name, Tara Clarendon, James Beckman, Amy Lasher, Allison Thamelets or tamelets or doesn't matter i'm sorry i'll never get it michelle mcmorris uh stephanie hawk uh mr and mrs arnie arbuckle senior jason durham

uh home stretch are we ready we're ready oh we're ready okay uh amy whittaker sophia gamble uh kendall broom or no it's bloom i think it's bloom it might be broom i'm sorry kendall uh rebecca bletchman blackman uh denny shearn uh damian barney liz vasquez eric eric langenecker uh anthony canella uh rachel stora jason fuller there he is uh janna gilbertson uh chelsea morgan christopher bossman boss man that's a dope last name uh thomas smith brendan ables jesse hartman uh alexis dobler kimberly thomas janice hill nico uh fuck uh neitho nico costa costa wizin costa wizin oosta wizin hey there we go that i'm in now that's wrong anyway uh nathan nolte tyler gwil david albury uh reagan shulkley crystal walker Tyler Gwill, David Albury, Reagan Shalkley, Crystal Walker, Clay Thorson, Julia Edwards, Shelly Kiff, Ashley Veo, Lenny Blunk, Amanda Dwornicki, Dana Grayson.

There he is. Amanda Berrigan, Jude Kendall, Peyton Meadows, Rob, no, Rana Abshir, Bourbon the Doberman. That's a dog on Snapchat. That's cool. Thanks, Bourbon the Doberman. That's a dog on Snapchat. Oh, cool. Thanks, Bourbon. Appreciate you. Karen Pang and her restaurant in New York is Hunger Pang. Do you see what it is? Yeah, go eat there.

It's in Brooklyn. Hunger Pang. Go eat it. Her husband's a chef there. Jason Miller. Roscoe Van Damme. Nathan Little. Jordan Bennett.

Susan Spiegel. Elizabeth Britton. Alex Browning. Karen Edgen, Nia Williams-Jones, I said that, and Justin Miller again. Thank you guys so much. They're so awesome because we don't require anything from anybody. We really don't. We don't require shit from you except to listen and maybe tell your friends or something. Yeah, that'd be nice.

That'd be great. But the people that go out of their way and they go you know what these guys give me like five hours a week of entertainment to listen to both shows a couple extra dollars or even a two hours a week if you're listening to one show two and a half hours a week and they go that's worth two dollars it's worth a dollar it's worth five bucks or whatever they feel like it is and that's what we like so fucking sweet we would much rather do that than like people put shit behind a paywall you got to pay this much per month to do that we're never going to put a price tag on it if you guys want to give us a dollar a month awesome you want to give us a hundred dollars a month awesome you want to give us ugots and tell your friend

great thanks yeah we'll take it whatever the fuck it's it's on you guys to whatever you feel like that's all it is and we're just uh blown away that you would feel like helping us out like thank you for that it It's insanely overwhelming. As much as we can tell you. It's changed our lives. Right. As much as we can tell you thank you, we can't tell you thank you. That's right, man.

That's what it is. So thank you guys so much for that. And Jimmy, what if they wanted to thank you or say fuck you? How would they do it? Either way. You can tell me thank you, fuck you, at WismanSucks, W-H-I-S-M-A-N sucks on Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat. Facebook is full. But I think every couple of days, fake accounts drop out. So that's nice.

I like that. And then that rewards somebody that's been sticking around for three weeks. Rewards with Jimmy's posts. Rewards with him complaining about traffic. Me bitching about all kinds of horrible things. You can find James not really bitching about much, except for sharing the show posts where at. And answering you guys.

You can find me at Jimmy P is funny, or just copy and paste my name from the show description because you're going to spell Petra Gallo wrong if you don't. So do that. You can find me all over. Say hi. Do whatever the hell you want. Saving is bitching for the show. Yeah.

Just save. Yeah, exactly. Just please, before you ask questions, just see if it's in the post first. Just do that. It saves everybody here a lot of time because there's a lot of volume of people asking questions, and it's just hard to answer, and we want to answer all you guys. So if it's answered, we're not saying, fuck you, you're a pain in the ass. We're saying we want to be able to answer all the questions.

So if it's something that you can find out in two seconds, just try to find it out. Streamline your questions. So if it's something that you can find out in two seconds, just try to find it out. Streamline your question. Yeah, streamline that. Also, anything like as far as like the time of this or age, this or that, or is there a bracelet venue? We know nothing about that. Contact the venue and ask them. That said, holy shit, I'm excited. That's good.

Holy shit, where's the Tylenol? Holy shit, where's the Tylenol? Live from the Crime and Sports Studios, we will see you next week. Bye. Bye. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Crime and Sports early and ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today, or you can listen early and ad-free with Wondery Plus and Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey.