Crime in Sports - #270 - Huge Ego, Small Calves - The Stuffness of Marcus "Buff" Bagwell

Episode Date: September 7, 2021

This week, we look at a man who was on television, just about every week, for about a decade, which went right to his head.  The problem is, it was gone, all at once. This caused him to spiral into an absolutely insane life, filled with drugs, arrests, more drugs, epic car crashes, and his very own profile, on a top Gigilo website, where he can be rented various increments of time, and very high prices. Oh, and more drugs, arrests, and even more car crashes! A wild one, from start to finish! Be unsatisfied with the bulk of your calves, have an ego that is bigger than your biceps, and take a bunch of pills & drive your car into the nearest train station bathroom with Marcus "Buff" Bagwell!! Check us out, every Tuesday! !We will continue to bring you the biggest idiots in sports history!!  Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman  Donate at... patreon.com/crimeinsports or with paypal.com using our email: [e-mail]  Get all the CIS & STM merch at crimeinsports.threadless.com  Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things CIS & STM!!  Contact us on... twitter.com/crimeinsports [e-mail] facebook.com/Crimeinsports instagram.com/smalltownmurder See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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That said, let's get into it. Let's do it. It's a wrestler, so we have to dive right in. It takes so much here to do it. And brain damage sports again. And, oh, man, this guy. I don't know if it's brain damage or just, I don't know if he came out of the womb like this,

but there is a problem here. There's an issue with this man let's put it that way let's talk about him marcus alexander bagwell better known as buff bagwell oh not jeff number number old buff bagwell jimmy oh yeah this is uh wcw he was in it right, like, 91 when they were in the dregs, the Jim Hurd era, when they were not doing well at all and any terrible storylines, awful ratings, terrible pay-per-view by numbers, all the way through the NWO and the peak and the, you know, kicking Vince McMahon's ass for a couple years, all the way to the death. He was there really through the whole kind of arc of the whole thing. So it's pretty interesting.

Was it Jeff Bagwell that played baseball? Jeff played baseball, yeah. Jeff was an Astros first baseman who hit 500 home runs and who was about your height. I don't care. I'm not kidding. I don't care what his baseball card says. I met that fucking guy when I was a bouncer in Arizona, and he was your fucking height. But two of you wide, though, in the shoulders.

He was on so much steroids, it was ridiculous. This was like 99. He was ready to burst. He was so vascular, it was ridiculous. But he was 5'8", tops. So let's talk about this Bagwell, Buff Bagwell. Yeah, old Bagwell. Yeah. Old Buffy.

He's born January 10th, 1970. So he's 51 now. He's born in Marietta, Georgia and pretty much stays in Georgia always. He's always a Georgia guy. WCW is an Atlanta-based company. So he that's kind of one of the reasons why he ended up there is because he was kind of known as like that, like a local, like a local guy. So they like that. They wanted to bring along some local guy. And right away, we have to say when he's younger, he's a handsome motherfucker.

He's very, very handsome. That's just there's no other way to put it. I mean, you can look at him. He looks like a douche. He looks like a douche. But in like 1992 parlanceance he's a handsome guy you know he's well put together as a nice chiseled face there's you know nobody would look at him and go that's an ugly guy right there isn't it right very rarely is that going to happen so that is going to work both in his favor

and of course against him of course because in wrestling you know if you're you might get the some of the ladies to like you but you're going to get the guys to hate you at that it's very much like women in comedy it very much is like women in comedy when you dress nice and put yourself together on stage the ladies in the audience tend to hate you because sometimes you look terrific sometimes though that's from female comics i've talked to that's what they've told me it's not what i've seen though because like i opened for nat Natasha Leggero and she's you don't get more. She's in a fucking evening gown with, you know, earrings on and everything. Oh, she's just makeup hair.

I mean, she looks like she is going to a fucking dude when she goes on stage. Yeah, she does not mess around. She looks like she's going to the ball. It's she's great. She's like she's like a classically trained actress right she's terrific yeah she's in every that's what i mean she's in everything she's like reno 911 yeah she's the one in the beginning running around in her underwear that they're chasing that's her she's hilarious but then then you look at the women love her though uh yeah yeah they love her there are

other women that that don't do that that's just part of her act though there are women that fucking wear like jeans and a ripped ass t-shirt and they do that because they don't do that. That's just part of her act, though. There are women that fucking wear jeans and a ripped-ass T-shirt, and they do that because they don't want to be too pretty and upstage the women that this is their night out and did some fucking effort to be here. Well, as a guy, it's the same way, though. You're trying not to look handsome on stage. That's not what you're going for. You know what I mean?

I don't know. I promise. Every time I go on stage, I'm trying so hard. You're trying to look nice, but you don't want the guys to be like, fuck this guy. You know what I'm saying? I don't think that's an option for me. Okay, I've had issues with height, I think, where they're like, oh, fuck this tall motherfucker, that sort of thing I'll get.

But you can't do your stud on your knees. No, no. There's nothing you can do about that. But I act a psychopath and they're like okay i like this guy he just said he wanted to he just talked about wanting to murder somebody in a footlocker i think i like this guy and that's by then i got everybody you know what i mean that's that works that's it but for me literally every time i've been on stage i have tried my ass off to look handsome tonight that's awesome well you do a very good job jimmy whatever shit i'm in was mad calculated i promise that's funny yeah looks can be a i think it can help or it can be detrimental either way yes i well i think it's weird because like women who are you

know put together and pretty i think they have a better chance of building a female audience and a male audience still. Whereas a male comic who is quote unquote pretty, that's going to be a woman audience. Like the guys aren't going to. How many guys went to see Chris fucking D'Elia when he was going strong? How many guys went to see, you know, a lot of girlfriends? Exactly. Their girlfriends drag them. And they were like, dude, I have to be at the 10th grade tomorrow can we please go home

that that is something positive about comedy being in an industry where chris d'alia is handsome that's very helpful that's the other thing is it doesn't take much no it's a very sliding much at all doing stand-up like starting out, on most lineups, I was the most handsome motherfucker there. I'm not a great-looking guy, but when you look around, it's like that dude's a freak. That guy looks like they drug him out of a fucking

sewer pipe. That guy looks like he slept in those clothes for three days. It wasn't a lot of competition. I looked like I showered and showed up. That guy looks like he's taking a union break from his taxi cab job. And he is. And he was. Yes.

That's what I mean. And then I would at least show up, like, showered with a set that was prepared. And I'd be like, oh, wow, look at that. So, it's not a hard competition. Looks like he smells like soap right now. This is nice. Yeah. Okay.

He looks like he's a comedian, at least. Like, this was his goal for the day was to be here, not like he was stopping here on the way to somewhere else. You know what I'm saying? That's all I mean. That's all you have to do is look like you're going to show, you look like you're there on purpose, and that's it. Not like you were like, hey, I think I'm funny from the fourth row,

and they were like, come on up and take a crack at it, chief. A lot of girls that I know like eliza and jess like they don't jess and me they don't they what they're wearing is calculated obviously because they're women but they but it's not like trying their best to look their best they're just they're just pretty women anyway though yeah yeah they're both good looking people i've heard them both say they don't want to upstage ladies that this is their night out i've heard that i think it's i think it's more of like once you're when you're starting out comedy, it's hard for a woman like that. Because once they get an audience, then women like that you're hot.

Then they're like, yeah, she's hot and I like that. Where it's different. But it takes until you get an audience, which is pretty much you can't do anything in comedy. Because I was just thinking about it. Guys are the same way until they get an audience. Basically, until you get an audience, you're just a total asshole who has to kiss a room full of strangers dicks every time you fucking see them and try to make everybody like you and it's disgusting so it's awful it's the worst trying to figure out what this audience likes because they like that guy what what does he do and who's his audience

and i gotta be that okay if you're a first-time listener to crime and sports we apologize for talking about stand-up for the last five minutes. It's too much comedy. It's a thing that happens whenever we talk about wrestling because, and we've even talked to wrestlers about this, there is a disturbing, disturbing parallel between wrestlers and comedians. It's the same lifestyle. It's the same everything. It's the same lifestyle. It's the same everything. It's the same neediness. It's the same I'm being somebody that's not actually me in front of people, and they all think it's me, but it's not.

There's everything about it. The drugs, us, and who dies in a hotel room more than wrestlers and comedians? That's how we die, all of us. You know what I'm saying? Whether you're Kurt Hennig or Greg Giraldo, it's's the same fucking might as well be the same hotel rooms it's the same death i'm kidding i'm not kidding though yeah and it's and it and it doesn't go across the board like uh like there's a there's a comic that talks about drugs their whole life they're gonna die it's also like john pinette dies in a hotel never once says he does drugs not a drug

yeah it just happens you know so now buff comes up here marcus he's a very athletic guy he's an athlete his whole life and you can tell i mean he's a very put together guy like you could even if even steroids aside to still be that cut up you still have to have pretty good genetics and have a pretty good base of operations to begin with to look good you know there's a lot of people i know if you gave them steroids they just look like big huge terrible looking people then it wouldn't help it'd be a little muscular meatball so he played baseball and football while he was in high school he went to uh sprayberry high high school sprayberry yeesh a berry that sprays you that's a very weird i don't know if that's

like something that grows in georgia or what i'm not sure how that works but um once he graduates he's during the day he's working for his family's lumber company yeah that's what he's doing there and then at night i guess he's he's training to be an amateur boxer he's working on boxing a little bit yeah he he's thinking about boxing. But this dude's too pretty to, you don't box if you're. You got too much to lose. Yeah, that's silly. You wouldn't do that.

So apparently once his family's lumber company ends up going bankrupt, he has to find another line of work somewhere to make money. So he becomes a massage therapist oh yeah like 18 or 19 so this guy just oiling up his hands gonna rub you down now 18 or 19 year old with aspirations he's seen porn this will get me late at least like yeah i'm gonna finger so many people dudes and chicks just everybody i don't care i'm all oiled up things happen you know so he um at that point he decides that he wants to train to become a wrestler and he does train to become a wrestler and uh steve lawler is his main trainer not jerry lawler steve lawler and he

apparently starts working in north georgia at first that's his first uh stint and this is a very small territory like this 1990 this is barely a territory everything is dead at this point so i don't even know what the fuck territory here uh so he's it's uh he's there trying this out and he goes as a fabulous fabian which is um definitely gonna get especially in the South in 1991, is going to get you some. This is a little ridicule. I'm thinking something alliterative that's going to come after Fabulous Fabian. Yeah, you're going to get that a lot probably back then from those people.

We're talking rural North Georgia. So beautifully. Yeah. It's rural North Georgia in 1991, and he's this handsome guy going, I'm Fabulous Fabian. Yeah. It's rural North Georgia in 1991. And he's this handsome guy going, I'm Fabulous Fabian. That's. Yeah. No. Yeah. Which if you're trying to be a bad guy, I guess that's how you do it back then. It's like Jim Cornette putting New Jack and Mustafa out there. And he's like, I don't care what we do. They're going to boo you. So let's make you bad guys. These people aren't going to like you. Trust me. Yeah. So he does that. Fabulous Fabian teams with Chris Walker to win the Georgia All-State Tag Team titles. A huge accomplishment there. Might as well say grace now. I won't. I'll hold off.

But I mean, obviously, these probably weren't even belts. They were probably some sort of old belt. It was. It was just a rope belt. It was an actual belt. Yeah. My dad's belt. The promoter wanted a rodeo the buckle there and he's like it's sort of a big title belt so from there he goes to global wrestling federation

do you remember global on espn in like 1991 1992 it didn't look very good it was clearly a lower budget operation than your wwf or wcw at the time it was this you know but for me i was like cool wrestling i put it on anyway and watched very much like the like the alternative football leagues it's yeah it's it's the same thing i'll always watch those so he i was watching all that shit at that time herb abrams uwf i'd watch i didn't care so global uh here he goes into global and the booker there at the time is bill edie who is the mass superstar and acts of demolition remember demolition from no wwf they had like snm gear on like they had like studded yeah their faces painted and like get masks on what is he demoing

like they were just tough guys demolition beat you up. Demolition. Because they'd pound you. Yeah, they'd give you ass demolition. So this guy's- Gimp gear? Kind of, yeah. That's what they looked like. Two huge, muscular guys dressed in gimp gear that were going to pin you down and have involuntary sex with you. That's what it seemed like to me.

I mean, look, in hindsight, that's genius. That looks great. Yeah. It's like Kenny versus Spenny when Kenny hired those guys. You didn't see that. You don't watch Kenny versus Spenny. No, not yet. Kenny hired these guys to come bother Spenny, and they look like demolition.

My love affair with Canadian humor lately, it's only a matter of time. I'm going to get to it. You will love Kenny Hotts like a fucking family member. to get to it it's the great you will love kenny hotz like a fucking family member kenny hotz is if you if you if you morphed me and you me and you together into a human being and then and then set us loose on one person who lives in our house and made it our job to be on tv and fuck with this person as much as possible imagine what that would be like that's what this show is that's fucking amazing torture and then makes them do a horrible humiliation at the end of it which is if you lose the contest

it's fantastic fantastic me and you has no idea that this is what he wants to do or like well they set out a contest and it could be something anywhere from something crazy like who can wear a gorilla suit the longest um to you know who can cook up the better meal okay and kenny will cheat most pretzels or some shit yeah and kenny will cheat constantly and spenny is like i'm gonna do this without cheating and i'm like and spenny's just a pretentious twat you can just tell he's a pretentious twat and kenny is very so you root for it you root for the punishment punishment. Yeah. You're like, fuck this guy. He's such a pretentious, like, just a stiff twat.

He's all, you know, he's no sense of humor. And Kenny's like, let's see how we can make him crazy. And that's the whole show. We're going to make him cry. It's amazing. So anyway, Bill Eadie decides that Marcus Bagwell, he's going to name him the handsome stranger. That's his gimmick. The handsome stranger, which sounds like it's from the 40s, number one.

Number two, to make it a little more old school, he's the handsome stranger, but he's got a mask on. They put like a Lone Ranger mask on him. Jesus. So he's like a male stripper kind of looks like hiding his identity he's the handsome stranger but if you're saying he's handsome take the fucking mask off him what do you have to take your word for he's wearing a mask i don't know if he's handsome he could be disfigured under there we don't know he's basically dressed as the guy that uh is a stripper in uh summer school yes there you go mark harman is very much about to

kick him out of class it's gonna happen you know it so anyway he's wrestling there for a little while and it's on espn so anybody who was half decent got picked up by wcw or or wwf we're talking x-pac you know sean waltman raven who was scotty flamingo at the time anybody who was half decent we've talked about many guys so bagwell ends up getting a call from magnum ta who was working in the office at wcw and the way wrestling works too is it's much like comedy hey we're looking for a guy i saw this guy down there you might want to take a look at him kind of like that the same thing with comedy you know anybody who can do this well i got that guy you might want to give him a call how many weird calls did you get out of the blue doing stand-up

where you're like so and so gave me your number thought you might want to do this it's 40 and it's in new mexico so can you do like 80 minutes of clean comedy for that what no i can't it's 40 and in san juan yeah you're talking about another country no no it's down near the southern border but yeah it's still in america it's it's technically america but yeah you'll you'll like it i think they're 40 though 40 yeah no gain well hopefully that'll cover your gas i don't know but uh round trip so uh gets a call from him and uh he ends up having a meeting with dusty roads and uh we all know dusty roads the american dream hard times rick flair so dusty is sitting around here and ends up meeting buff and sees buff and goes he's a handsome young man buff bagwell's the very handsome he's a handsome man i think uh

i think we could do something with him is what i mean he's a handsome young man so that is a terrible dusty roads but it's the best i can do it's as close as we got that's it he's a little lispy and i got it he's just kind of doesn't speak that uh dusty is the funniest fuck he's he like he has like a speech impediment and all this shit and he's hilarious and you can still want to hear him talk for two hours he's fucking hilarious so yeah he ends up um uh picking up bagwell here and hiring him he makes his television debut and beats rip rogers who's a kind of just a journeyman veteran at that point who's a guy who's a good worker and a guy if you want to make somebody look good he's a guy of just a journeyman veteran at that point, who's a guy who's a good worker and a guy, if you want to make somebody look good,

he's a guy who can make somebody look good. So you put him in against kind of a hand-shows and things. So he looks good on TV, and he debuts on WCW's Saturday night show there. And so he ends up being in WCW. He goes under his real name, Marcus Alexander Bagwell, here for a while. First, he's just Marcus Bagwell, and then after a few weeks, he's like, I think the thing that's missing is the Alexander. I think if you put that in there.

Really got to get my middle name in this whole thing so that everybody knows just who I am. It's very plain, Marcus Bagwell. If you give me another name, then it's snappy like a serial killer. You know what I mean? It's got something. Marcus Bagwell. If you give me another name, then it's Snappy, like a serial killer. You know what I mean?

It's got something. So he's at the Clash of the Champions in January 21st, 1992, which was like a quarterly show they put on TBS. It was almost like pay-per-view matches, sort of, they put on TV there every few months and he actually him and brian pillman great wrestler here beat terry taylor who's the red rooster if you don't know yeah and uh tracy smothers as well there and then uh so he goes on a he becomes a tag team with the z man who is tom zank who um a long story but he ended up coming to wcw after he worked for wwf they signed, co-signed for his house and shit. Like, and then he was mad that he was making less money than his partner and he quit. Give you a place, bud.

Yeah. Well, his partner was Rick Martel, who'd been like a heavyweight champion in other places. And he was a new guy. So it's like, you're not going to make what that guy makes. He's got he's the draw of the team. Stupid. You're the young guy. Be happy.

So anyway, but they're pushing marcus though here super brawl 2 which is a pay-per-view he beats terry taylor there who's going by terrence taylor at that point oh that's a good name very good he was like not terry see what's missing is the terrence that's now i sound there's a thousand terry taylor's in this country there's very thousand Terry Taylor's in this country. There's very few Terrence's very few Terrence's. That's the problem here. So, uh, yeah,

him and Z man are beating people on TV. Um, he does get beat, uh, at the wrestle war pay-per-view by Scotty Flamingo, who was Raven after Raven came in there. He, uh,

he, and, oh boy, this is fucking cool here. Him and Tom Zank, June 16th, 1992, him and Tom Zank, June 16th, 1992. Him and Tom Zank lose to Rick Rude and Steve Austin.

Really? That's cool as fuck, yeah. A blonde-haired Steve Austin at the time. A stunning Steve Austin. Haired. Yeah, long blonde hair. And fucking Rick Rude is one of the most badass dudes that ever wrestled. So that's pretty fucking neat anyway.

He loses on TV to Paul Orndorff in 93, which that's not good. That's a bad sign in 93 to lose to Paul Orndorff, really. Loses to Chris Benoit, too, as well, on TV. That's when Benoit was first coming in. He went to ECW after this. Him and Johnny B. Bad. Remember Johnny B. Bad, Jimmy? I doW after this. Him and Johnny B. Bad. Remember Johnny B. Bad, Jimmy? I do not.

You don't remember Johnny B. Bad. No. He was like if Little Richard was a wrestler. You don't remember that guy? Oh, no. He'd literally go, whoo. He'd do that. I swear to God.

In his interview, he'd go, whoo, like Little Richard. He's not black is the problem. He's not black, Jimmymy you can't do that people thought he was black because they just acted like he was black so they're like he must be black he's not fucking black jimmy dusty roads was like he just looks like little richard see i get i get a little richard vibe off him you know we could do that so it's 1993 little richard is i'm a kid i'm not looking i'm not looking to root for little richard at this point in my life like you know what i mean so kind of played out by let me say he looked like little richard so he gives him this gimmick where i mean he's got a confetti gun he comes out going and he's got this gun where he gets up on the top

rope and goes poof and like confetti shoots out of it i'm not kidding and his music is like like a like a musac wcw knockoff of a little richard song and he comes out it's it's bad bro wow and oh my by the way to reiterate he's not black is the main problem there not black at all not even a little bit black that's just terrible but they had him do that for years on national television i mean they made him get tan and everything it was fucking weird jimmy i wonder i wonder how that guy's doing today mark miro i think he was married to sable remember really yeah that was his wife she was crushing life she she was only in the wwf or e or f at the time because they hired mark marrow and that was his wife she she came with him to the interview and vince was like who's this who'd

you bring with you pal oh boy look at you we could uh she did that because she ended up being on a playboy cover that oh she made a fortune madness it's i can't remember who said it but there's a famous quote of some guy going they showed up he was the big star three months later he's carrying her goddamn bags and worrying about what she needed to do because he was garbage and she was the star by then like that's how quick was magic she went from not in the business to a star overnight to on my wall because vince was horny literally because vince was like look at her oh she's gonna be your manager let's take pictures of her so she didn't even have to be naked man she you know like a high-cut leotard holy fuck her legs

were magnificent yeah so that's and like i said that was just luck of finding her because she happened to be married to a guy they hired. She showed up with him. So it's fucking very, very strange. And Vince was disappointed when he got there because he's like, oh, yeah, I can't use Johnny B. Bad. I got this guy. Who the fuck is this guy? You're not black. What's going on?

He was very confused. So here's something for you. February 13th, 1993. Shit. This is the 7th. February 7th, 93 on TV bagwell beats brian pillman oh okay which is pretty big the next week february 13th on wcw saturday night and on tbs national television marcus bagwell beats stone cold steve austin not stone cold at the time he's stunning

but still beats steve austin so that's that's he's always has that under his belt there so anyway they're so they're sort of pushing him again um they have uh there's one match that i find particularly funny because it has the two of the participants in it are two of the are the two largest penis wrestlers i've ever heard about there's no no rick flair doesn't have a big dick he just likes taking it out just like so there's three guys in wrestling that everybody you know normal guys if you bring them up they'll go like dick on this guy my god like it's that it's that huge where you have to bring it up first not even oh great guy i love the guy you know known for 20 years but have you seen his dick it's insane so uh it's marcus bagwell teaming up with too cold scorpio who is one of the legendary dicked guys in wrestling um they say that he would like swing it around like a

fucking literally swing it around like like eddie murphy and raw doing the microphone chord for the jamaican guy that's what that's what they said he could actually do. And they beat Bob Cook and, oh, no, this is Sergeant Buddy Lee Parker. I thought it was, God damn it, never mind. I thought he was managed by the character of Robert Fuller, who was the Colonel. Colonel Parker, I think he was. That was the difference. And he's got a huge cock? Robert Fuller is known as a humongous cocked guy as well, like ridiculous.

They're like, it's a foot long if it's an inch. And then the other one is Virgil, Ted DiBiase, the million dollar man's guy. They all said his dick was ridiculous. He could wear it as a belt. It was silly. One of those matchbox racetracks back in the day where you could just take off your belt and lay down. Do you have any desire like as a kid did you ever have that as a even as like a young man did you have like i wish this was just enormous because there was like a week that i wished that and then i was like nah i don't think i ever really thought about it like i never wanted a circus penis really

like i wish this no i'd like something that people are scared of when they see it isn't a thought i came you don't want scared that's not the the what you're going for there anybody i show it to i want them to go no problem or at least all right they're not not like oh god jesus um wait a minute hold on a second here let's we're gonna have to figure this out i've seen porn where guys two-handed james and like it's crazy i've seen these enormous ones i'm like i don't want that that's that's way too much too much it's just too much penis congratulations on your eight inches of dry dick because you're not getting all that inner yeah these that from what i understand every one of these guys are like you know know, footlong, ridiculous penises. That's absurd.

Absurd penises, these three guys. Yeah, and it's not even that racial. It's two black guys and a white guy. Robert Fuller's an old white guy with a giant cock, and then the other two are black dudes. Giant old man dick. Very strange. Giant southern old man cock. So, 94, they put Marcus in a tag team with the Patriot, who was Del Wilkes.

And he was exactly what he sounds like. He's a guy in a mask that has stars and stripes and red, white, and blue on it and shit. And they become Stars and Stripes. Oh, my. That's their tag team name. And, yeah, they actually beat harlem heat and on in on march 26 2000 or 1994 they beat harlem heat because harlem heat was pretty new still so which is god that's ridiculous after that 95 they put them in a different tag team where i assume they're basically supposed to be

like a team of two male strippers that are coming to do a bachelor like a bachelorette party that's the only thing i can think of they're called the american males which that sounds like that's american thunder down under that's what it sounds like and it's him and scotty riggs and they have like their hair slicked and you know scotty riggs has long hair he's got all slicked back and marcus has the little caesar do that he has he rides this caesar do to the end too he it's a hard Caesar, too. It's not even... It's a hard Caesar. Like, it's got hard lines on it, that haircut.

I did that for so long. Longer than I'd like to admit, James. I don't think you sculpted your eyebrows like this guy, though. He looked ridiculous. Mine was just at the... I don't know know right at the top right at the tippy top yeah you just pushed your hair forward and we're like there good there was nothing else i could do i've never been blessed with shit to do up there

you always said you're even when you had hair it wasn't good hair you said no like it was terrible hair and it didn't work anyway i'm glad it fell out you're like it just didn't work for me. I'm fine with this. I don't give a shit. So bad. Bad hair. Terrible hair. On an edition of WCW Saturday Night, he has a singles match with Ric Flair in 1995, and Flair beats him, obviously. Taylor Swift is soaring high. Her every move captured in the news cycle and devoured by her devoted fans.

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He teams with Johnny B be bad for some reason on one night and loses there he uh uh arn anderson and rick flair as a tag team or great tag team obviously they beat uh marcus bagwell and jim duggan so hacksaw he teams with hacksaw which is a very strange team this is kind of just a snapshot of this era here. The American males beat Harlem Heat on September 18, 1995, to win the WCW World Tag Team Championships. Wow. The American males. And then September 25, nine days later, Harlem Heat beats them to win them back.

So they did have a nine-day run, though. So that's something. It's sometime in the mid-'90s where he – I can't overstate his vanity. I can't. I can't. It's not an act. It's real. His whole I'm buff and he's adjusting his eyebrows, that's just real.

He just turns that up. They always say in wrestling it's the same as comedy. You are yourself, but turned up to 11 is the thing. You know, if you're a one normally, you do it to an 11. And that's kind of what your craziest thoughts in comedy, you take you

and your like weirdest part of you and your weirdest thoughts. And some people do characters. I mean, obviously, which that's not really any more too much, but no, it's like Andrew Dice Clay is a character. That's not Andrew. That's not him at all.

People get mad at him. And it's like, are you stupid? You paying attention? Yeah, that's he's that's like satire. I get that. You don't like the jokes. That's fine. But you're not mad at Carol O'Connor because he said something on all in the family back.

And like, it's not it's a character he's an actor like that's he's acting he's like wouldn't it be crazy if there was some comic who's like this i'm not like that because my last name's silverstein so obviously it's not me that's his last name he's like clearly i'm not that guy but i've seen that guy around the neighborhood and this is what he's like and he would be an asshole like this i'm barely italian i'm mostly jewish that's what i mean so it's like yeah anyway i don't know if some people might some people who weren't around might see that later on and go oh god that's super offensive and you have to know like that dice he wasn't like that like even at clubs he's known as the nicest to the staff he's known as the least creepy with women.

Doesn't do that shit at all. Helps young comics. Always helped him. Not a misogynist at all. Gives women gigs and also is very respectful. And Sarah worked at the comedy club and said that he was like Uncle Dice, basically. You know what I mean? He was not the least bit creepy. He was like, I'm an old man.

How's everybody doing tonight, young ladies? You know, like, get everybody some coffee. Is that good? Thanks for coming out. Not even you look great. Is everybody doing all right? Can I help anybody? He's just a nice guy.

He's just an old Jewish guy. You need somebody to walk you? It's an act, everybody. You know, I'm not saying that you have to like Dice's act, but it was an act. And, you know, much like wrestling. But this is not an act is what I'm not saying that you have to like Dice's act, but it was an act. And, you know, much like wrestling. But this is not an act is what I'm getting at. This is not an act for him. The vanity.

He loves it. It's just him. He's so vain that he gets some surgery to a part of his body that he's not happy with. He's just not happy with it. What do you think a wrestler might get a surgery on to enhance his look because he's not happy with his body lipo pull the waist in a smidge no no no he's he's got no no fat on him it's not that at all no no he's not a part of him is not as muscular as he would like what do you what do you the ass did he get himself ass he got calf implants. How vain do you have to be to even notice your calves?

They are. Muscle builders will tell you, have you ever tried to build calves? If you've ever tried to build calves, you will see how fucking hard that really is. And I can see him doing it, just going the lazy way and just saying, put shit in there. No one cares, though. No one ever looked at him and goes fucking calves on this weak bitch like no one ever thought that he's got 22 inch arms no one's like and calves on you dude they're weak bro how do you how do you how do

you hold those your sticks are a smidge little it's so fucking funny so eric bischoff was asked about this later on because this didn't come out till later. Like this wasn't even in the dirt sheets and shit like that. Eric Bischoff, who was the boss at the time in WCW, he said, I remember when it happened. Just the ribbing. I mean, I don't know how Dave Meltzer or anybody else hadn't heard about this because the entire roster was laughing and talking about it. It took a long time for Marcus to live that down. A long time. Nobody.

Yeah. long time for Marcus to live that down a long time nobody yeah nobody even tried to hide the fact that they were having a great time at Bagwell's expense by laughing and joking about this the thing they were laughing about was the he got an infection when they explode one of them exploded so he had to take time off and get like them taken out and it was a big procedure yeah before he came back um so Bischoff says, I do remember it, the ribbing he took. I can only imagine how he felt coming back. I think the only reason he was able to come back and work his way through it is because he was so vain and didn't care.

Wow. Wandering around with one big cap. Are they like silicone? Yeah, they're silicone. That's what they were. They were saline, I think they were. He had an infection in there and then one of them burst and it was a it was a fucking disaster. He said he probably felt at the time that having massive calves was one of the most important things in his life.

Maybe the reason he wore long tights is because he felt insecure about his minuscule calves. I don't know. He did. He wore long tights. Always. He wore the pant tights and covering up his calves covering up those weak ass calves he's like i can't let my calves out man they're just weak it's hilarious so and bischoff is that's the best way to put it so 1996 he gets a role in a movie

oh he gets a movie role here he'll do a bunch of really bad movies. Really bad. I like that. This one looks really bad. It's called Day of the Warrior. And it has what appeared to be two. There's no kind way to say this. What would you hear? What would you say those ladies are dressed like, Jimmy, or looking like? Oh, those are hookers, James.

They look like, yes. dressed like, Jimmy, or looking like with... Oh, those are hookers, James. They look like, yes. They look like a costume. If you said, look like a Vegas prostitute, go. And that's what they look like, but with automatic weapons in their hands. That's the cover of the fucking thing. So that tells you a lot of what's going on here.

The tightest leather top. There's nothing going under it. It's not a jacket. It's not a... That's your leather top. The one's got like a bustier with not a jacket. It's not a... That's your leather top. The one's got like a bustier with diamonds on it. They're in the jungle with machine guns. That's what I'm saying.

This isn't like... It's out. Yeah, this isn't like they were going out for a night on the town and decided to open fire. They look like they were going on a Rambo mission with like six inch stilettos on, which is the sign of a bad movie. Super comfortable. A little unrealistic, you know?

the sign of a bad movie super comfortable a little unrealistic you know i didn't see like you know uma thurman and fucking kill bill dressing up like this to go out and get her business done it's hindering to the action is what i'm getting a little bit yeah so this is called day of the warrior it's from 1996 and the agency's computer database is compromised by a powerful criminal named the Warrior. Now, with the list of all the undercover agents' identities in hand, he's going after them one by one. Hot girl after hot girl. And he plays the Warrior, Marcus Bradwell does. I don't think he's in it very much, but he plays the Warrior in this movie. So this movie, not good. Ted P plays the warrior in this movie so uh this movie

not good ted pryor's in this movie which is a very bad sign he's in a lot of like famously bad like shitty action movies that are direct to video in the mid 80s that's very famously uh bad movie actor what made action movies go away so fast i don't know i think they're expensive to produce, number one. They cost a few bucks. Explosions are expensive. They're awful. Yeah.

You have to have a lot of people supervising. And I think that's what it was. Plus, they were just kind of out of fashion. I think, honestly, the fucking Berlin Wall falling is what killed action movies. I'm not even kidding. Before, it was just easy oh it's a russian whatever the fuck you could just say that and everyone was like cool that's you know yeah rambo's got to go against them because they're hooked up with the russians obviously that's

how it works whereas after that happened we were like i don't know who you're gonna blow up really who you're gonna blow up now calm down right true true lies is maybe the last one where it was like yeah and that's a satire yeah of the whole genre he made schwarzenegger made that and last action hero like in this year period they were both satires of his whole career which i thought was kind of funny i loved last action hero i was into that known as a terrible movie but i enjoyed it too actually i saw it in the dollar theater in arizona when it was like 114 degrees outside. It's like, I'll see this. I liked it.

What do you want? Is that right? So, wow. He beats Pez Watley in 96 on WCW Saturday night. Pez Watley must have been a fucking hundred at that point. He looked old in the mid 80s. I don't know where they pulled him out from um finally here uh in late december early uh january 1997 bagwell ends up turning on scotty riggs his american nails partner

leaving him lying fucks him up and he joins the new world daughter yes yes so this was the shit it's the new world daughter was pretty cool and And I'll go over this extra super, super briefly here. New world daughter are Scott and Scott Hall. Kevin Nash came from WWF to WCW, hired them away. They're looking for some way to put them in. Didn't have the new world daughter idea right away, but they brought them in as these outside guys. them in as these outside guys they had the pay-per-view with bash at the beach where they had uh supposed to be three on three uh nation hall and their secret partner versus three wcw guys it was luger sting and macho man so they had it like that where they had it so uh luger gets

like injured they do it that way so they're you know he has to be like carried out in the middle of the match so it's two on two and And then they like beat Sting down outside. And then they have Macho Man in the ring all fucked up. And it's Hall and Nash is beating the shit out of a prone Macho Man on the canvas. And then Hulk Hogan pops out down the aisle. And it's like, oh, he's going to kick some ass now. That's right. And he comes in and Hall and Nash clear out of the ring.

Like, you know, we don't want to fuck with him. and then he leg drops macho man and leg drops him again and then it cuts a huge promo saying how you know all my fans can kiss my ass and i'm tired of this new people are garbage and screw this and we're the new thing now and fuck you and it was pretty uh it's the last time i've ever seen like the ring fill up with shit like that. And it being for real, not now the fans do it, but they're like, let's do that thing where we fill the ring up with shit and throw it in there. Like back then, this was actually, people were like, fuck you.

I just bought this fucking t-shirt for my kid for $30 and now you're going to be a bad guy. Eat my cock. People were mad. Red and yellow. You son of a bitch. Yeah. People were literally pissed.

I just bought a foam finger. You fucking twat. Are you joking? This thing was $14 and now you're fucking not even wearing those colors anymore? I will kick your balls in, sir. I was a Hulkamaniac and now you're wearing black and white? Talking about Hollywood, doesn't even sound like Hulkamania. No. What are you doing? God damn it. even sound like hulkamania what are you doing god damn it my kid is crying you asshole i paid so i could come here and tell my kid it's a it's just a thing i don't fucking know so anyway that they became the new world daughter and then they started picking up different people from the you know around them and building this big giant thing and then it eventually swelled to like i don't know half the fucking roster and it was a big joke but it was really cool at first so oh it was so rad it was cool and buff was one of the first people to be in it he was one of the

first wcw people to join that wasn't like an old wwf guy and uh so he came in and he actually it actually mattered still when he came in it wasn't when they were just getting everybody because after a while they had like, you know, IRS in there. They had fucking, you know, Virgil. They had all these fucking people in there. It was so silly. Like the video game. You were like, I don't even know who to choose. There's so many to choose from.

So many. It's like a great PlayStation. Yeah. It's like a menu at the goddamn Cheesecake Factory. Oh, there's more pages. I thought this was drinks back here. Jesus, there's another page. What the fuck? It's just pastas. I thought it was drinks but there's another two pages of pastas.

How many pastas can you make? I don't know who to pick. This is fucking exhausting. I guess I'll take Buff Bagwell and the Bowtie Pasta. That's all I can imagine. So, he becomes at this, part of the cool group of wrestling. He's not. Because before that, he was always like lame Bagwell.

Lame. Stop pushing him down our throats. And like the American males. Even their theme song was bad. The American males. It was fucking bad, dude. It was embarrassing. It was fucking embarrassing.

Well, I mean, he was handsome poppy. He may as well have poppy-ass music with him. Yeah, but it just made everybody hate him, though. No one liked him. Anyway, so now he is, at this point, he is no longer Marcus Alexander Bagwell. He is Buff Bagwell at this point. I've got to say, grace. This is grace. It's all working out for him at this point.

It really is. I mean, through 97, he's fucking killing it with WCW. He's got the buff blockbuster as his move. He starts really looking like a douchebag, though. This is the douchebag buff era where he's, remember the top hat, Jimmy? Did he have a gimmick like that oh for years he wore and it'll come up later because it got him in trouble he it's like a mad hatter style top hat that he wears but less exaggerated on the but and it says like buff and like you know flames and

shit on it jesus i have a picture of him wearing that hat and a pair of overalls with no shirt. And the overalls have a big giant thing on the plate on the chest that says buff. It's all flames and shit. Oh, my. Like a metal plate that's all inflamed? I think so. It's the douchiest combo I've ever seen a human being put on their body. It's awesome.

I'll post that as one of the pictures on social media because it's crazy. At Crime and Sports, if you want to see that, it's hilarious. Or at Small Town Murder on Instagram. So this is the douche buff era. In 98, he gets another part in a movie. Really? Look at you. It is lethal, but L-E-T-H-A-L.

You know, it's an acronym. Lethal. Lethal Ladies Return to... L period, E period. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. Lethal Ladies Return to Savage Beach. Okay. And this is...

This is like, it sounds like a sequel. There you go. It's not? Yeah, it is. A stolen computer floppy disk filled with information about the location of a mythical treasure in Savage Island will lure both villains and lethal location of a mythical treasure in Savage Island, we'll lure both villains and lethal agents into a dangerous treasure hunt. Look at her on there with her gun.

And her tits out. Yeah, this stars Julie Strain, who I think she was in the other one, too. Yes, she was, and I looked her up. She's in a bunch of, like, softcore like really and a lot of like foot fetish videos. Ryan DB is like a lot of weird like like people jerking off on her feet and shit. I don't know what's going on. Julie. Yeah.

Whatever. I mean, your work is work. I don't know. Do do whatever you do. So 1998, he there's he's in a match against Rick Ste steiner and you remember the steiner brothers yeah rick is the non-blonde one the guy who didn't go blonde and crazy the uh big papa pompous scott his brother rick was the one who kind of was the look like he's just kind of hunched over a little bit and you know it's like a normal guy with a big walrus mustache. Right. That's what I remember. So Rick gives him or attempts to maneuver a bulldog, which is a very easy move, a bulldog.

Not easy. I'm not a wrestler, but I mean, it's a very common move. In comparison to the others, yeah. Yeah. It's not a move that's like a risky move they just came up with. They've been doing it since the 40s. It's a, you know, not, you get a guy in a headlock and run and you jump on the ground like you're driving his head into the ground.

It's basically you both jump up and just flop on the ground. Somehow, Buff actually got his neck tweaked in this and his head tweaked and ended up breaking his neck on this maneuver in 1998. Yeah, he actually broke his neck on this. And if you look at it, it's just weird looking. It's just a too much of a too much of an angle. So Buff has a broken neck now. Oh, Steiner crumbled him. Yeah, Steiner gives him the bulldog and breaks his neck.

So Buff has a broken neck at this point. Oh, no. He says he's laying in the ring here. You know what? Let's give them it in their own words on this, because this is very true. This is him lying in the ring thinking he's paralyzed. So I feel like this needs music. What do you say in their own words?

Quote, at this point, I'm 100 percent convinced that this is a and this is a big statement. I'm convinced I'm paralyzed. I swear to God, my mind went to, you know what? You can do what Christopher Reeve is doing. You can go to schools i really turned a negative into a positive situation in a matter of seconds he's laying on the ground yeah in the middle of of an arena thinking he's paralyzed going well and mapping out the remainder of his career he yeah the people are still walking around around him

they don't even know he's hurt yet and he's's like, I'll be Christopher Reeve. I can do this. Where's the pony? I'm going to go to schools and give speeches. There's a pony around here somewhere. It must be, right? Where the fuck is that son of a bitch? If you don't get that reference, if you're not a patron, on the Patreon XFL episode, Vince McMahon says that he is, we got to tell everybody because we're going to use this reference all the time.

Vince McMahon has a statement that he said i'm the eternal optimist if there's a pile of manure under the christmas tree there must be a pony which is fucking amazing so now both like paralyzed in an arena going where's the pony where's the pony there's got to be a pony here somewhere. And the pony is that. Now, that's just interesting. He said that he never asked God why it was happening to him. And he said he never cried either because he said it was just too surreal for him to process. This is also happening in five minutes. So you could also be in shock as well. You just broke your neck. It's another issue.

Also, I mean, Christopher Reeve did pretty well there going to schools and speeches, I imagine. Yeah, he did. Probably made a bunch of money. Yeah, he did, but he was also Superman. Right. That's the difference. In several movies, not just Buff Bagwell in a couple video games. At the end of it, he can go, no matter what your situation, you can still be Superman.

That's what he can say at the end, and the kids go, I'm so, oh my God, I'm inspired. This guy, they're like, why do you have your hair like that you have skinny calves you know that the kids are picking on him ask me to fix your eyebrows for you you asked me to line up your brows like no i'm not doing that absolutely not my finger what are you doing he did say that by the time he was loaded into the ambulance, he could move his fingers and toes by that. That's a relief. So he said that was good. Eric Bischoff, Lex Luger and sting rode with him,

uh, in the ambulance to the hospital. Now, by the way, him and Luger should just never be together because lots of, every time something dumb happens for a few year period, either if buff does it, Luger's with them,

or if Ler does it buff is with him it's fucking when we do the luger episode buff will come up a lot it's silly so and we will do a luger episode because i found a shitload more arrests on him than i thought there was looking through this i was like whoa he's got a long record so they they go to the hospital with him he says quote we got to the hospital and they wheeled me out and I was all drooped over the wheelchair. And as soon as I got into the waiting room, I popped up with a double bicep pose. And they were like, oh, my God, what happened? Why are you OK?

And at that stage, they realized I had a bruised spinal cord. That's not a broken neck. That's what they thought it was, was a broken neck at first and got him in the whole thing. And then he pops up flexing and they're like, what the fuck is wrong with you? So I've been telling my body to do this since he pile drove me, and it just listened, finally. I meant to do this after the match, you know? This is my thing.

I hit the double bicep, because that's his pose always. He's got that thing, and he smiles, and he kisses his biceps. He has a whole thing where he gets down on one knee and does it, and he's like, I'm so pretty. Look at me. Oh, God, I'm amazing. And he means it., he's kisses his biceps. He has a whole thing where he like gets down on one knee and does it. And he's like, I'm so pretty. Look at me. Oh, God, I'm amazing. And he means it. That's what's bad.

He he actually I can't imagine what kind of a fucking circus this was. But do you remember the old Politically Incorrect show hosted by Bill Maher on ABC, which was actually a fun show in the late 90s? Because they'd have a bunch of weird people on and they'd argue about the issues of the day. Right, it was before politics fucking hurt people, which is crazy. Yeah, this was, they'd just go back and forth and people could literally argue about politics and then afterwards they'd forget what they were talking about.

They'd giggle and move on. It wasn't as vicious. Affecting friendships and families. Yeah, yeah. It was less life or death, I think, at a point too back the back then so uh december 10th 1999 he's on politically incorrect not just him also sting medusa the ladies champion of wwe who came over there uh and dumped her belt in the garbage can and really pissed vince off to

where he would never hire her again because she did really that was that was one of the requirements of her coming there was you still have your belt you got to dump it in a garbage can on live television and otherwise you can we're not i'm not hiring you she did it what are you gonna do you need a job i think that's a great move too though by the way uh the owner of the diamondbacks likes to find people in visiting gear and offer them free diamondbacks gear if they throw that shit in the trash right now it's not an even swap that's not an even swap no it's not an even swap you have garbage i'd be like oh thanks i need a napkin i forgot when i have these nachos are very messy so give me the jersey of that guy i've never heard of in right field and we'll do this the guy you just brought up from triple a give me that yeah

give me him oh and in addition to sting medusa and bagwell bobby heenan was on the show which bobby heenan could talk circles around all that's i mean he's the greatest talker of all time in wrestling so i mean him on there would have been hilarious um that night on the late late show with craig kilbourne it's right under it in the newspaper. Farrah Fawcett and Martin Mull on there. Oh, boy. That's something. And then Kevin Spacey and Christina Applegate are on Late Night with Conan O'Brien. Jesus.

So there you go. Not talking about cancer or diddling boys. That's what I mean. Talking about probably that sitcom she had on NBC in the late 90s. And then he was in movies. Who the fuck? Oh, American Beauty. Yeah, it's 99.

Fuck, he's an Oscar, you know, up for Oscars and shit. So May 9th, 2000. It is Monday Night Show. The big Monday night show here. And this is ridiculous, man. It's in Springfield, Illinois. Just central Illinois. Nice little kind of mid-sized college town.

Springfield, Illinois, just central Illinois, nice little kind of midsize college town. After the show, there's a production worker backstage named Daryl Miller. Now, this Miller guy apparently was carrying a big carpet through the backstage area, and he's a crew guy, so he's got shit to do. As people like us, it's not a wrestling crew, but we you're, we do stage shows. So we're at theaters. There's crew people moving shit all around. If you see a crew person carrying a big thing, you get the fuck out of their way. Fuck yeah.

They're busy and they're taking something somewhere probably to facilitate what you're doing. Right. So your show happened. You get the fuck out of their way. Oh, excuse me, man. Oh yeah.

After you, you got stuff going on when I'm on stage. That's my time. And you get the fuck out of the way. Every time, and you get the fuck out of the way. Every other time, I'll get the fuck out of the way. I'm doing nothing. I'm useless right now. I'm not doing a stand-up show

in the middle of your carpet moving, and then in the exact same flip of that coin, don't run that carpet across my stage when I'm up there. That's it. That's the fucking rules here. Now, apparently, they were trying to get through a door in the backstage area he wanted to get through, in front of the door was bagwell lex luger of course

and elizabeth macho man savage's ex-wife who is now with lex luger okay so they're all they're all standing there talking now uh apparently the guy was coming he said hey you know can you guys move out of the way so I can get through here? Buff said, we're busy. We're talking. So you got to wait. This guy's carrying a big carpet.

Like, dude, come on. No, we're busy right now. It was just, he didn't want to be told what to do by someone quote beneath him. That's all it was.

So apparently words were exchanged from this. And then Bagwell decided to, and this is a quote from the police report, quote, punched him upside the neck. Upside the neck. Upside the neck, as the Daryl Miller man put it. He was punched upside his neck. So, so much so that he was left with a big fist print by the time the police were there to figure this out. Why would you punch a crew member in the neck because they're trying to move a carpet?

That is because you missed his head. You missed his head. Probably. Yeah, it's a bad shot. So he's charged with assault for this. Wow. You can't punch fucking people in the neck. And this guy was like, fuck him.

I'm not taking this shit. He's charged. I filed a battery charge against him. It took a week for the charge for him to file the charge, and then he ends up being arrested for that, and he'll go to court for it later on. But that is pretty ridiculous. You're fucking beating up crew members

and getting arrested for it. That's one of the more asshole things. Truly. Just an asshole, egotistical thing of anybody we've ever covered. We've've never had in all of our time. Somebody like beat up a clubhouse guy or something in baseball or some dude who works in the back of a football game. We've never heard that before. That's crazy.

You have to be a special kind of asshole. Usually fight with other people not like you that you work with. Right. Fuck. So anyway WCW immediately suspends him for 30 days for this. As he should, yeah. As he should. Because otherwise the crew's going to fucking revolt.

You need these people. They're the ones who are making the television show happen. You need the wrestlers, obviously. They're the talent. But if the camera's fucked up, well, guess what? Who cares about what the wrestlers are doing? So you need these people. So in order, I think, to keep morale up,

they suspend buff for 30 days saying that they stand behind their employees and they're sending a message that the wrestlers are not allowed to not allowed to do anything like this with employees they have to treat them with respect and all that kind of shit which is good that's actually smart so 2000 here he's in a movie as well so the year picks up for him he's in a movie called terror tracked with a t terror tracked it is starring john ritter ckt trac t tracked yeah so urinary infection like a urinary tract infection he's this is a real estate agent terrifies a couple with the grim fates of the previous owners of a house they're looking at.

Okay. That's American Horror Story. Kind of. Like half Pacific Heights and half fucking American Horror Story. You can mix those together. That's what it sounds like. So Pacific Heights. Was that Michael Keaton, I think, back in the day?

Yeah. He just turned 70. I love Michael Keaton. I'm blown away that he's 70. I love Michael. I just watched Night Shift away that he's 70. I love Michael. I just watched Night Shift again like two nights ago. He's amazing. Night Shift is top three all-time comedy for me.

I just love it. It's just... He's an amazing actor. He's so good, man. I just love him. He's so ridiculous in that movie. Yeah. It's his first movie, so he's real raw in it, but he's funny.

He's just good. I like him because he's also got like a... Yeah, because he's a stand-up comedian. He was a stand-up before that. That's why he's so raw in it but he's funny he's just good i like him because he's also got like a he's got yeah because he's a stand-up comedian that's why he's so good yeah he's got he's got this raw sex appeal that's real too that like he's not a handsome man but like that guy just to me he's what jimmy pulls out he's got a raw sex appeal i don't know what it is about him his calves are very attractive to me raw sex appeal i love him i love my michael keaton i've always said is the poor man's tom hanks i've always felt like if you can't get tom hanks go get michael keaton because he'll do probably just about as good a job maybe not in philadelphia

but if you give him fucking you know most of the roles he's been and i think he'd do just as good a job honestly yeah he's good if you good. I think he could do Castaway. Michael Keaton by himself can do shit. He's funny. He could have been in The Money Pit. He could have been in The Burbs. He could have been in any of those 80s comedies, I feel like, because he was great back then.

And he would have been just as good or better. Yeah, that's what I mean. He's not the dramatic actor, like you said, Philadelphia. And he is now, too, because he was nominated for an Oscar. He did Birdman, and he was great. And he's a great actor. God, he's so good. Yeah, he didn't get a chance to do a lot of drama.

He's the best fucking Batman, because he actually seems like a human being, not some weird fucking thing. Batman's a real guy who dresses up. He's not a fucking nuclear radiation-affected freak. He's a fucking real guy who just happens to be rich and buys a goddamn lots of gadgets. So why does he act like he's not like that in the new movies? I don't understand that.

And why does he have to have some fucking weird gruff voice when that's not his fucking voice? Yeah, we talked about that. Why put that shit on? He's with Alfred. It's in all of them, though. He's with Alfred.

He's helping him get dressed. And he's like, why are you putting the voice on for him? He knows you're Batman, stupid. He knows who you are because you have a fucking head and the rest of the suit's not on you. You fucking idiot. He polished the Batmobile last night. Dumb shit.

He packed you literally some carrots and a little thing and put in the cup holder of the Batmobile so you'd have a snack when you got done fucking fighting the Joker. I'd venture to say the real superhero here is Alfred. It's Alfred. So, use your regular voice and respect that man. Anyway, Terror Tracked,

year 2000, stars John Ritter and David DeLuise, who I... Dom's brother? No, Dom's kid. I've met one of the DeLuise kids

at this movie premiere of my friend of mine that I went to and I can't remember which one, if it's David or Peter. Oh, but... Nice guy, one of the Deluise kids at this movie premiere of my friend of mine that I went to. And I can't remember which one, if it's David or Peter. Oh, but some. Nice guy. One of them, David or Peter.

Real nice guy. I think it's David because Peter's more of a big fat face on him, I think. More Dom than not? Yeah, exactly. He's got more of a Dom looking face, whereas David doesn't look as much like him. So I think it was David. But nice guy anyway. So he's in that movie, like that matters. On Christmasmas eve 2000 he goes to court for assault on the crew guy and he is sentenced to you sir

they fuck off 20 hours of community service and he is fined 500 you bad sir bad damn it um he said that he thought the guy this is what this was his excuse why he did it quote he was being pushy yeah and so we punch people so you punch someone in the neck apparently for that uh this doesn't require him to plead guilty it's just some other kind of you know one of those you know whatever they do adjudication of whatever the fuck so anyway um one thing i found here that i have to point out uh it's not really the sales jimmy the sales but right next to this article is an article as an ad for cell phones from 2000 and think about how great your plan is now compared to this like

oh oh i remembered you're like 22 you don't know how fucking bad it used to be. This is a free digital cellular telephone, first of all, is the ad here. From who? What's the company? You're on the Verizon network, but it's Money Talk Cellular and Wireless Inc. is where you get the phone. You get all this shit, free car charger and leather case. Wow. Here are the plans.

Okay. free car charger and leather case wow um here's are the plans okay uh for uh what is this for 450 for 20 a month you can get 50 anytime minutes and 450 night and weekend minutes 500 minutes on the phone 500 total minutes for the week for 2020. The month. Or the month. The month. The month, not even the week. That's insane. Or for $30 a month, you could get 300 anytime minutes and unlimited night and weekends. Okay. And then for $55 a month, this is if you're a big baller here, 700 anytime minutes and unlimited nights and weekends.

But you used to have to count your minutes, everybody's a thing that happened it's unbelievable you have to be like call me tonight yeah call me past eight or seven whenever the night started i remember it was like that or then if you had someone who was on the same network as you you could talk and it didn't count it's like awesome are you on verizon sweet okay we can talk then. Otherwise, I was going to hang up on you. I've been with T-Mobile since 2001 with Verizon. It was VoiceStream then when Jamie Lee Curtis was the spokesperson. And I've never left. And they still treat me like I'm a piece of shit when I call them. I want to tell them, I've had this shit for 20 fucking years.

They're like, yeah, you and everybody else. Put a little respect on my name. Put a star on my account, would you? So Buff here then forms a tag team with Lex Luger in 2000 called Totally Buff. Oh, boy. Because, you know, they're both pretty buff. So that has nothing to do with Lex.

It's all me. Totally me. He's totally, because he's the total package. That's why. He me. He's totally... Oh, because he's the total package. That's why. Yeah. He's the total package Lex Luger, and he's Buff Bagwell. So they're totally Buff. Yeah, that's how they do it.

That makes sense. That's pretty stupid. Oh, his other tag team before this with Scott Norton, that big giant guy, was Vicious and Delicious as well. Oh, I kind of like that. He was the Delicious, obviously. I want us to go by that now. Vicious and delicious.

I like it. That's pretty good stuff. You take a chili sandwich. Who's who? And you go, you tell me. It's on you. And then you wink. It's on you to decide.

You tell me, wink. You're like, what? Depends on. Depends on your feeling. Not sure. Depends on what you're in the mood for we just won't tell you who's what that is fucking hilarious oh man so anyway they uh he's got some like i said he's tag teaming with lex luger they have a stupid nickname uh february of 2001 he is in an episode

of charmed oh yeah with shannon doherty and alyssa milano and what the hell is in this yeah it's a terrible show but um i guess not if you're like into like witch shows i guess it's pretty cool so 30 year old women pretending to be 19 is weird it is a little strange it's a little it's a little on the creepy side yeah yeah so uh that's so common though i was watching have you watched ap bio yet not yet because it's on fucking uh peacock peacock it's not on anything else and i'm furious about it's fucking phenomenal by the way if you haven't watched it ap bio if you can find it somewhere fantastic with glenn howerton as the teacher and the kids in it are phenomenal these

they're so funny i started looking them up i'm like man i'm so impressed with such a young crop of like teenage fucking funny actors like it's so hard to be funny at a young age like that i was just so impressed i'm like are they in anything else they're all 26 they're all 26 the youngest one's like 22 like seriously it's i'm like wow but they still look young and you don't they literally they look it's a great fucking show but i'm like that's right yeah you're not funny like that when you're when you're 16 that's right that's what happened you don't have that kicked you a few times because you're old enough you don't get it yet okay the wait is over far, you're not losing.

The only thing you're losing is my patience. Quickly, I see that. Bing! The queen of the courtroom is back. I didn't do anything. You wouldn't know the truth if it came up and slapped you in the face. I see he's not intimidated by anything. I can fix that.

New cases. She wanted to fight me. Leave her alone. OK, so, um. Not this is not a so. This is a period. Classic Judy. Did you sleep with her? Yes, Your Honor.

You married his cousin. His brother. That's not him. Yes, ma'am. I would make a beeline for the door. The Emmy Award winning series returns. How did I know that? I have crystal ball in my head.

It's an all new season. It's streaming. You can say anything. Judy Justice. Only on Freebie. So he's on an episode called Wrestling with Demons, obviously. It's got wrestling in it. And when Prue discovers that one of her ex-boyfriends is being led down the path to becoming a demon,

I hate when that happens. You know how many ex-girlfriends I've lost to demonic possession? It's just all of them. It's so common. It's so common. I just let it happen. I mean, it's none of my business anymore. Gotta write them off.

But them, she, Piper, and Phoebe risk their lives in an underworld wrestling ring to save his soul and obviously he's the you know one of the wrestlers basically i'm sure he's like the demon wrestler or some shit so it's at this point vince takes over nitro buys wcw yeah and the last episode of nitro is vince mcmahon standing there in the fucking ring which is obviously nuts i mean it was like what the fuck is happening here they had it was a simulcast in the beginning of raw and nitro were the same thing it was like whoa this is trippy so um he says that when they because the guys didn't even know it was happening like Like, just Vince and Shane showed up and they were like, how's it going? Or Vince was at Raw and Shane was here. I can't remember how it worked.

But apparently Shane was the one who showed up over here. And he said he just walked in and he said, quote, hey, my name's Shane McMahon. I own the company. My dad bought the company today, so now we own the WCW. We're going to keep some wrestlers. We're going to get rid of some wrestlers. We're going to keep some referees. We're going to get rid of some wrestlers. We're going to keep some referees. We're going to get rid of some referees.

We're going to keep some office talent. We're going to fire some office talent. Good luck. See you later. And he walked away. Welcome. That's fucking wild. So they're all.

That is shitty. That's on purpose, obviously. Vince loves to make people, you know, scramble for their jobs. It's his favorite thing in the world. So he said that uh they weren't even on the show him and lex luger and they were the tag team champions so they thought that were was weird uh he said i didn't think that was a good sign and i started to leave and he said then his dad called him and he said where are you at and he said i'm heading home

and he said they just did a big thing in the ring in Cleveland with Vince via satellite because he was at Raw. And with him and his son, Vince with his son, and Vince named five people. I'm not saying this because I'm your dad, but he named you one out of five. Because he was saying, Vince was asking the crowd like gladiator style, like, we want some of these guys over here or do we want to fire them all? Should we just get rid of all these guys or do we keep some of them? Tell you what, what do you think of this this guy and he'd have him like cheer or boo yeah they're gonna let them it's it's fucking disgusting honestly like he's caesar yeah exactly

i get that like for him he's triumphing over them but it's disgusting to make fucking people who work for a living scramble like that that's that's just you get when you're i realize if it was a character be one thing but it's it's him he's getting off on this shit you know if you're fired in front of an audience that's like your office if there's like 13 people there that's embarrassing enough but he's firing people like in front of like 20 000 people that's fucked up man he did sting luger goldberg hogan and bagwell those are the five he asked the crowd about really yeah so those are five of the biggest star four besides Bagwell four of the biggest stars there are in wrestling period so to put Bagwell in that group you know he says quote I was in the five which was huge

and of all things I got a good pop I mean the second biggest one I didn't know until it I watched it back all my top talent buddies Luger and Sting, said, bro, you're fine. If he mentions your name on TV, you're in. He had a contract and a lot of the guys didn't. Vince was offering people buyouts for pennies on the dollar of their long term deals that they had with WCW. WCW to was basically they could either keep their contracts and get paid fully because they're, you know, it was Time Warner that they had contracts with. So they could either get paid fully or they could take a buyout and come work for Vince if he wanted you. So some of the guys who had big, giant contracts were like, fuck you. I'm making two million. I'm making a million five a year.

You think I'm leaving? Eat my shit. So Goldberg, I i was gonna play football and that didn't work so this is what i've got i got this uh so sting uh and lex luger both said fuck you i got too much time and money left on my deal because some of the guys had like three years left on their deal with a shitload of money on it so they were like i'm not giving that up why would you you know i'm collecting my money so uh bagwell though he's 31 he's in the prime of his career and he's thinking i gotta keep my name hot get out there so he actually takes the buyout

and tries to go to wwf at this point so um anyway uh it wasn't good it never was good nobody liked him there and uh a lot of it was his attitude they really expect you to be a humble like behind the stage behind the stage behind the the scenes they don't want any more sean michaels over there so they need you to be in terms of talent in terms of behind the scenes disruption so they they want everybody to kind of be not an egotistical maniac at this moment go along kind of or somebody who's not an asshole so he uh someone who's not a fucking ridiculous cheater so he he uh he ends up in a training session for new wcw recruits because there's the rings are different wwf has a bigger ring than wcw and the ropes are different. WWF uses actual rope ropes.

And WCW use metal cables with the rubber on them. So a lot different bounce, a lot of different. It's just way different. You need some. The ropes in WWF then are like elastic ropes? They're real ropes. They're fucking ropes. Like actual.

Like a fucking rope that you would climb in gym class. They just, they tape, they get ropes, put them up, and put tape around them. That's how it works. They put tape around the whole thing, and that's your ropes. So there's no fling to them at all? Well, yeah, they're stretched out. That's why they bounce like that, the ropes. Yeah, but it's not like elastic rope?

No, it's a fucking rope. They use real ropes, which a lot of the guys prefer, whereas they use metal cables in WCW with rubber tubing on it so yeah it's a much different you know it's a different bounce and the ring size is different your your timings off if you normally go into the ring and you know you bounce off the ropes and do take two steps and do that now it's two and a half steps or maybe three steps it's a they make them look like the fucking rubber bands james they do you watch like all back in the day guys like yokozuna going off the ropes and those fucking ropes go way back and you're like whoa those are gonna snap you know is that that's happened ropes have snapped in training before a lot i mean

whereas the cables don't snap their metal cables are meant to withstand you know 20 000 pounds or something elevator cables is that right i did yeah something they say that you know elephants could go on these cables so um apparently during this class bagwell was fucking with somebody and making fun of them really bad and it's shane hurricane helms who is a little guy and you know little flyer guy and he was telling him that he would never amount to anything because he doesn't have any muscle mass or definition like oh look at, look at you, pal. You're all. What are you, my calves? Your calves are weak. Your whole body's like my calves. That's what it is.

It's disgusting. So he's literally telling him he doesn't have enough muscle mass. He's like Mac on Always Sunny. Yeah. You just need more mass is the thing. That's my main issue with you. Apparently, he ended up getting in a fight. This escalated to a fight where bagwell slapped him

because shame helms is like 135 fucking pounds he's this little tiny guy and bagwell's jacked full of steroids 240 pounds so he slapped the guy and apparently helms threw a frozen bottle of water into the back of his head oh jesus causing us a cut to open up and buff needing 20 stitches from that 20 stitches 20 stitches that makes sense that's fucking ice man oh it's ice yeah and they they took helms's side on the whole thing they're like this guy comes in from the outside he's picking on some guy and then slapping him with the fuck yeah he does it got what he deserved so apparently there was a match on monday Night Raw where he ends up, this is his first match on TV with WWF, and it's against Booker T,

who is another WCW guy. Awesome wrestler. He's amazing. He's great. He stuck around forever in WWF, so that tells you how he's amazing. So anyway, during the show, he's going to do a promo, Bagwell, and he is told not, by all fucking means and under any circumstances do not wear that dumb shit top hat that you fucking wear yeah don't wear that it's stupid

burn it you're an idiot he said okay and then wore it anyway on live television so there's no way to like go back and cut it out or anything. So anyway, they, uh, it's pretty fucking ridiculous. Do not wear that. No, I'll wear it. That's, that's fine.

Why not? Yeah. So, um, anyway, he ends up giving, he ends up getting his release a few days later. They shit can him.

So he takes a buyout, comes in for a week and then they fire him. So pays and they're like, that's it, bud. Yeah. Um, while it was also the following night there

was a dark match and he complained about he played it was against jbl and he complained that they jbl power bond bombed him too stiff this guy was a little bit stiff so um they told him because he was complaining they told him why don't you take the weekend off and come back on monday how about that if you're so hurt because he said i, man. That was a stiff power bomb. They're like, great. Then take the weekend off. The next Raw is in Atlanta, which is where they know him. He'll be-

That's where he's home, yeah. Get a big pop there. So he says that there's a discrepancy of who said he needed time off. He said that he asked for time off. And WWF says that his mom, Judy, called he asked for time off and wwf says that his mom judy called and asked for time off for him it's a big difference i didn't mention one of his wcw storylines was his mother was always with him judy bagwell yeah she's always with him um you know it's my little marcus it's this whole thing at one point she becomes co-tag team champions, Judy Bagwell.

Yeah, I'm not kidding. That is stupid. He's very oddly close to his mom. And it's even weirder because in 2001, he marries a woman named Judy, which becomes other Judy Bagwell. Can't do that. He's married and divorced twice from 91 to 2001, by the way. Somewhere in there, he gets quick married and quick divorced here a few times. So Buff says, quote, they said, why'd you get fired from WWE? And he says, quote, I still don't know, but I can tell you the whole story of how I got fired.

I walked into a room with Vince, Jim Ross, and Johnny Ace, and it took me five minutes to realize I was getting fired. That's actually a long time to realize, to take to realize. I think you get that pretty quick. Sat there for five minutes like this is a happy meeting, and then you're like, oh, I think I'm getting fired. Well, what he did, very childlike, he said, quote, I raised my hand and I said, are you all firing me? Excuse me?

Raised my hand. He said, and Vince said, no, Mark mark we're not firing you we're releasing you yeah giving you opportunities like a fish that you catch and you want it to get stronger in the river so you release it that's what we're doing we're releasing you back into the stream marcus we want you to be strong yeah um he said uh so i asked what the difference was, and of course they had an answer for that too. He goes, well, if we release you, then we don't have to redo your contract when we bring you back in three months. If we fire you, we'd have to redo your contract. Okay.

Because WWE brings people in and out all the time. So there's a big difference there between released and fired. So that's how that goes. They're telling him that because uh you'll probably be back in three months if we were if we were firing you that would be bad but this is just you know you're not on the we don't need you yeah we don't need you right now basically we got a full house and they had so many wrestlers and then all these wcw guys to choose from i mean the roster was it was the greatest roster in the history of wrestling they had everybody from the last 20 years that was any good right so um he said uh so i had i told myself that

i had to start shaking hands and smiling because it was over so that's what i did you got to go up and oh well great thanks for the opportunity can't wait to hear from you next time and so he said yep he said trying not to cry i grabbed my bags later on, though, he's a guest on the Stone Cold Steve Austin podcast, and he said, quote, I'm 100% convinced, right or wrong, that Jim Ross ruined my career. There are only three witnesses, Jim, God, and me. Hates Jim Ross. He said, I believe with all my heart, Jim Ross really, really, really took his time out to bury me. I don't know where the hatred came from.

He loved football players and athletes, and we talked every week when he was at WCW. I think that Vince was done with WCW way before we knew, and he made us go out and do the match in Tacoma, Washington. This is the Booker T match. When he could have waited a week and done it in Atlanta. when he could have waited a week and do it, done it in Atlanta. I mean, if you own the company and you call it the invasion and the other owner lives in Atlanta,

you can do it 5,000 miles away, or you can wait seven days and do it in their backyard, which makes sense. But he wanted to see if buff was even up to doing that. That was the whole point. So he said, but instead we do it where WCW has never been. Me and Booker get booed out of the building.

We knew it was going on, but you didn't go to Vince and say, you're not doing this, of course. You're a main event on Monday Night Raw. I mean, you just don't ask those questions. I don't think it was as bad as people say it was, talking about the match, but it wasn't just an average match

or even below average. It was a shit match. It was a piece of shit match. And Booker T is a great, he's a fucking great wrestler. So to have a shit match with him, you have to try, it seems like, because he's pretty goddamn good. So he says, you don't fire a buff Bagwell for a below average match. You don't fire a buff Bagwell.

I mean, after 11 years of world tag team championships and doing everything right and being in shape, you give him a warning. You give him a smack on the hand. You don't fire him no that's what he thinks there um jim ross has a different uh opinion on the whole matter he says quote buff had a higher opinion of his work than vince did that's pretty simple i've become the bad guy because i'm the middleman i'm the guy that delivers the bad news or the good news at times. I don't hold any animosity to this day on Mark Bagwell whatsoever. I saw where he had a car wreck and it was involving, I think, drinking, maybe something here in the last few months. That's a foreshadow.

He just wasn't a good fit. That partying lifestyle. We're trying to distance ourselves a little bit if we could. Vince just didn't see the money in Mark that Mark saw in himself. He said, I can only deal with the hand that's dealt me. I'm told this kid is not going to get it. I want you to let him go. And he said, when we were in Atlanta,

we went into a little room, and I remember it vividly. I didn't enjoy doing it. How the hell can you be a human being and enjoy telling another human being that they're done? I'm not that person. I felt for him, and I felt bad for him. It didn't have a lot to do with Judy Bagwell, but that's good dirt. Damn, that's really good dirt. Judy had a little to do with that. Mark's own personal habits and the way he conducted himself was fucked up. Let me air out. Let the air out of his sails. But if he had a better attitude

than that at a young age, at some point, we're talking over 20 years, he would have had a shot to get playing time. He wasn't given given that opportunity it seemed like partying was a little more important to him than becoming professional so that's fine i mean is that real that's what he said that was jim ross on the whole thing he's like it wasn't he it wasn't a animosity just vince said i don't need him get rid of him that was jim ross's job to fire him it's like i didn't fucking care about the guy either way i don't give a shit um yeah he said i had no agenda no reason nothing against him he says was i the guy that gave him his notice yes was i the person who made the decision to let him go no it's like not my decision so um yeah that was that he um he said i managed 100

people i don't have time for this shit i I don't know anything about it. That makes sense, though. I mean, obviously. So Buff said he waited three months, sat there for three months patiently, and then he's like, OK, I'll give him a call. They said, when we bring you back in three months. So he said, I waited three months, almost four months, just to show I wasn't bothering them. You know, let it ring twice. You know what I'm saying?

He said, I called up Jim Ross and he goes, I swear to God. He went, what do you want, Mark? I went from Buff Bagwell to what do you want, Mark? I said, Jim, let me totally clear the air here. You guys asked me to call you back, call you back in three months. I waited three months and three weeks, almost four months. And what I did, what you all told me to do. I was scared I'd get heat for that.

But I said, I did what you asked me to do. And he said quote we have no openings we'll call you if we do click that was it later fucker and that was he never got called back ever again ever again nope they never called him back again so that's how his wrestling career died in wwe yeah that was it big time wrestling was over for him pretty much so things are going terribly for him obviously yeah he's gone from top of the world to eating a big giant dick in a fucking matter of three months so what do you do when things are going terribly jimmy i gotta have a kid you gotta get married is what you need to do and he sure as hell does he gets married to a woman who has the same name as his mother. And that's his third wife, Judy.

Jesus. That year he's also voted by the Wrestling Observer, which is like, that's the dirt sheet one that's kind of all the behind the scenes. You know, it's not the bullshit. It's all the real, like, oh, they're like the hardcore fan type of shit. So the Wrestling Observer voted him, quote, most embarrassing wrestler that year. Oh, no. So that's not good. No, you don't want to be most embarrassing anything.

Yeah, it's fucking bad. He said at this point, depression set in and his pill addiction spiraled out of control here. Now he's got nowhere to go. He's got no structure at this point. So just do pills. He said his daily intake of pills went all the way up to 20 Lortabs and 40 Somas a day. That's a lot.

You know how many fucking... If you took that, you would die. If you took that right now, you would fucking die. If you took 20 Lortabs and 40 Somas, you'd probably die. Your fucking heart would probably go to sleep maybe yeah because he has a huge tolerance for it so i mean he had to build up to 40 somas you can't just pop 40 somas so i knew a kid that took eight and i didn't see him for a week yeah he said he slept for two days but this dude's doing 40 a day jesus i've heard of guys that's a day. That's a muscle relaxer, man. You can't move.

I think it was Raven was up to doing 150 a day at one point, which is nuts. 150 pills a day. I'm pretty sure. Yep. The Somas are the wrestler's favorite because they get drug tested for like... I've heard multiple wrestlers back and do shoot interviews going, yeah. I mean like I was a big weed smoker, but they test you for weed. So you couldn't do that. So I just do pills.

It's like, stop. No, let them smoke weed. What are you doing? Literally? They're like, I mean,

you need something to go to sleep at the end of the night and you know, your knees are sore and shit like that. I just started taking pills because they don't test you for that. They give you those. He's like, but you know, weed, you're not allowed to do.

Whoa. That's a painkiller, right? I think I believe so. Yes. That's a painkiller, right? I think I believe so. Yes. He said his income plummeted, obviously, because he went from being on television. He had to sell his house and his cars and move into a smaller house at that point. Had to downsize.

He says that, quote, wrestling was an invisible leash for all these dead wrestlers. He said, you know everybody like that he said authority he said they uh when there's no more leash there's no one uh to say yes or no as as to when you should stop taking pills you just go deeper and deeper until you start od'ing because no matter what they'd have to be ready to go at showtime and be able to be on you know they couldn't be like half out of it on pills at showtime or they get fired so that kept them if you did pills at night then you had to get up work out eat do your show do pills later it's like a you know cycle whereas then it just becomes

roller coaster yeah then it becomes you just wake up and do pills if you don't have anything to do it for he said he tried to be a functional addict he was wrestling on the independent circuit and he said at that point he was still making about 150 grand a year on the indie circuit because he was he's very very well known name he's a big name so i mean indie wrestling he's he'll get he got paid decent money at the time yeah but when you're taking 40 lore tabs or that's not easy to that's 150 grand in pills that you're taking every year. Absolutely. Absolutely.

You know it. I mean, holy shit. And he's doing his wife is pissed off. She just married this guy and he's like now he's gotten fired and he's hooked on pills really, really bad. She said, quote, It's been tough, but marriage is tough anyway. Everyone has some fault. I have faith in my and i have faith and my parents raised me to take care of the ones you love which she needs because she said sometimes he would fall

asleep with food in his mouth and i had to wipe it out so he wouldn't choke then i'd walk him up to bed and change his clothes that's how fucking fucked up he was wow that is crazy, man. So April 2002, he ends up in TNA wrestling for a little bit. Really? I think this is when it was. This might have been just when it was still just pay-per-views. I think at this point, I'm not even sure. Like those weekly pay-per-views. That's unbelievable to me to do just a pay-per-view wrestling show that don't you have to.

You know what I mean? Like that's an opposite. You build the audience and get them to buy it. You don't like't like yes put it out there for purchase and what if nobody what this was the weekly show was on television the weekly show was on pay-per-view so you'd have to pay for the weekly show which is that's like releasing a podcast straight to patreon and never building an audience that's never having anyone outside of it to buy the patreon it's very weird but the way they did it it made sense because wrestling fans were so like fuck there's only one wrestling now they went from nitro and fucking you know and uh raw together to just raw just that thing and then tna hired a bunch of the old wcw guys they had sting right away they had guys like

that so anyone who was craving that was like oh i just want to see it so they would they would actually do it but you've got to find that to know that it's there it's yeah they just advertise it a little wrestling wrestling fans will find that shit too wrestling fans they're looking for that stuff and they're like oh shit there's a new show with sting and all that and they'll talk found more wrestling over here yeah absolutely they're really good with word of mouth even like ring of honor became very popular just from word of mouth essentially so they uh so he ends up on there he says that he doesn't want to be buff anymore on tna he wants to be marcus bagwell again and then he just disappears and he's gone for a whole summer in

2002 and then he's back at the end of the summer and um yeah just nothing really going on here for him essentially he's got not a lot happening he returns and uh loses a match and that's about it he does team up with lex luger again i'm sorry he wrestles against lex luger's luger and sting are teaming up luger and sting versus jeff jarrett and buff bagwell so i mean they're putting on yeah they're putting on a match like that where you'd go, eh, I mean, what was the pay-per-views? They were like $9.99 or something. Yeah, and in my mind, I see it at like $99, you know what I mean?

$100 for, because I'm watching fucking Tyson fights. I'm not watching. Yeah. It makes sense. That's not so bad. I think the way they were looking at it is like there w there's one wwe pay-per-view a month and that's 40 bucks so why can't we just put four on for a total of 40 and that'll be like the competing thing but yeah it didn't really work out they needed tv like you were saying

and they eventually like you said got on tv and it still never worked out very well still a piece of shit and aew has overtaken them by far immediately on their first night they were the number two already like it was not even a fucking that's how bad TNA was so um he apparently June of 2003 he tries to get a hold of WWE again asked for a job again and they told him no no thank you so now he starts wrestling I'll just this is snapshot of 2003, 2004. I won't even tell you who he's wrestling, just where he's wrestling. World Pro Wrestling in Florida. Cleveland All Pro Wrestling in Florida. MXPW which I actually remember that one CIW I don't know what the fuck that is AWE Cleveland

All Pro Cleveland All Pro Blue Water Championship Wrestling that's gotta be in in Florida this is where he's in a brass knuckle street fight with somebody that night you say brass knuckles a brass knuckles street fight with Jermell Quinn illegal

it seems like a lot now they used to have like Brass Knuckles? A Brass Knuckles street fight with Jermell Quinn. That's illegal. It seems like a lot. You can't do that. No. They used to have taped fist matches. That's one thing. You could fake that, but you can't have people clinking each other with Brass Knuckles. Fuck. So these are all the things.

A premier championship wrestling. He got beat by Hacksaw Jim Duggan at Buffalo Brawl in July of 2004. This is bad, man. Southern Wrestling Alliance, he loses to Lex Luger there. It's going very bad, and it's only going to get worse, because in 2004, he also gets arrested for DUI. He's gotten allotted. He'll have a total of, I believe, six DUIs. Are they drunk actual DUIs, or are they Bill's DUI?

No, no, no. He's under the influence of Lortab and Somas at this point. Yeah, you can't do that. And a lot of them, a lot of them. The bottle won't do that. Oh, absolutely. From this incident, he's going to be sentenced to a 20-month Cherokee County drug program because he's got a problem.

He's got an issue. He says, though, in 2006, he had his heart shocked and that helped him because he said he had an atrial fibrillation, which is an irregular heartbeat. Yeah. His soma addiction is making his fucking heart go to sleep. He said that the irregular heartbeat prevented him from kicking the pills for some reason. I don't know how that works. I don't know. I'm not a doctor, so I don't have. I'm not confirming I don't know how that works. I don't know. I'm not a doctor, so I don't have I'm not I'm not confirming nor denying that that's a thing.

I have no idea. So he says that a doctor shocked his heart back into rhythm in 2006 and he was better. But this is when he started realizing that he had a problem. He said he would get enormous chest pain if he tried to get off the pills. that he had a problem. He said he would get enormous chest pain if he tried to get off the pills. And then him and his doctor discovered an opiate called Suboxone.

Suboxone. Suboxone that helped him to wean off the Lortab and the Soma. Suboxone's terrific. Suboxone, yeah. He said, it saved my life overnight. And he said he did a Real Sports segment, which aired that year, where he says he was still taking some painkillers and muscle relaxers,

but he says later on he had stopped those pills, so he's doing fine. July 2005, from a Florida newspaper, it's just like in the sports section, the odds and ends, somebody wrote a question in, where is Marcus Buff Bagwell wrestling? This is from

George Duffy in Hollywood. He needed to know so much that he wrote a letter to the paper. Old George Duffy in Hollywood. He needed to know so much that he wrote a letter to the paper. Old George Duffy can't find it anywhere. It's fucking 2005. Google it. You could find it. Google exists. Wow. The answer, quote, a mid-card performer

in WCW throughout the 1990s, Bagwell is working for independent promoters while trying to get his personal life in order. In an interview with whatever the fuck website, Bagwell said he is in rehabilitation for an addiction to painkillers as part of a sentence he received following a fourth arrest for DUI in Georgia. That one there was his fourth. That was his fourth that year. So and then he'll have another at least three that I know of coming up. So it's a lot here.

There's also some Lex Luger incidents here. Lex Luger gets a DUI in 2005. And Bagwell said he tried to stop him from drinking that night. Really? Yeah. He said, quote, I really tried to help Luger.

I said, don't leave. Please stay here. Judy will get us something to eat. Don't worry about that. I said, don't do it. And he just refused. When he got in the car and he smelled those hash browns, he took a couple bites of hash browns and there it was.

Knotted out and went out. Apparently Luger fell asleep and got arrested for it. So those McDonald's hash browns are glorious. Is that what it was? They were McDonald's? That's what I pictured in my mind. Fuck that. It's down south.

Waffle House bullshit. Smothered and covered? Forget it. I'll pass out too. This is make you will because you're sleepy your fucking blood flow to your heart slows down this is disgusting i'm not a waffle house but they have a couple smothered don't get me wrong it's all christ hash browns are amazing they're so good especially if they're like they're done right where they've got a crisp on either side and they're gooey in the middle. Always extra crispy.

Oh, fuck yes. But yeah, definitely. So December of 2005, Scott Steiner, I believe, I think it's Scott. Scott Steiner, Buff Bagwell, and Lex Luger are removed from a flight to Winnipeg following a disturbance they caused on the plane. Oh, they were those guys. You're not famous enough to cause disturbances on the plane anymore, guys. Sorry. All three were detained for several hours.

Bagwell and Steiner were eventually released, but Luger is held without bail because he had some drug charges that were pending against him that he hadn't done much for. Yeah, he's got some issues. Now, 2005, a little snapshot here. He's in Great Lake Wrestling, fucking MCW, Global Championship Wrestling, which is not the same one from 1991. No. World Pro Wrestling, all these shitty indies. April 2006, he appears on a show that looks like it only airs in Canada

because it's from a Canadian newspaper, I found it, called Vanity Insanity. Oh, boy. And it's a show, it's on Channel 8 here, and it's Marcus Buff Bagwell, a professional wrestler whose calf implants exploded. That's their subject that week. Also, they're talking about botched or shit that just went bad.

Shit you did for vanity that didn't work out for you, basically. It didn't take. You thought you were real pretty, didn't you? Now what, eh? Not so good looking now, are you, eh? Yeah. 2006, he gets another DUI at this point. This is more pills pills by the way

so he hasn't hasn't kicked shit essentially and he won't for a long time as we'll find out it's a problem now there's another issue here Chris Benoit around this time is the obvious Chris Benoit murdering his wife and son and apparently

they share a doctor Chris Benoit and Marcus Bagwell. They share Dr. Phil Astin, who was indicted for over-prescribing anabolic steroids after Benoit's death, and they investigated the guy. His name is Phil? His name is Dr. Phil Astin, like Sean Astin. Phil will fill it. Phil's going to fill you up, motherfucker. Don't worry about that.

Goddamn. Is he an actual family doctor, or is he the pharmacist? No, he's a real doctor. He can prescribe shit. That's what he does. He's just filling. Everybody, all these wrestlers have doctors, tons of different doctors that they get prescriptions from and stuff.

So this guy was their guy. Bagwell says, quote, ifris benoit was alive today he would say man i can't believe bagwell outlived me because i was going to be one of the first ones that went down well he didn't he had to hang himself did you excite man i can't believe bagwell didn't murder his wife and hang himself in his own basement i figured he'd do it well before i did he's fucking talking about i can't believe i outlived him. It's choice, man. He didn't just fucking die. Yeah.

It's Jesus. He didn't just drop dead in a hotel room. Good God. But he claims that now, in 2007 here, he has kicked his painkiller addiction. He is, what is it, Jimmy? Yeah, he's good now. He's good now. Super good.

Good now. Yeah, he's good now. He's good now. Super good. Good now. He even met with the Georgia Athletic and Entertainment Commission to help them to discuss drug testing and other regulations for professional wrestlers and promoters. It's pretty interesting. This meeting took place.

Chris Benoit's father has been pushing this all through to try to get these guys to have some control over what the fuck they're putting them putting in their bodies because michael benoit the father he faults the wwe for failing to provide proper drug screens and treatment for head injuries that his son sustained in the ring which i agree with um so uh anyway bagwell he said that uh during this time here i found he was at a georgia wrestling promotion show at a Hot Wheels Skate Center in Woodstock. A skate and a fucking roller skating rink. Roller skates. Jesus. He said, I went from 75,000 people at the Georgia Dome to 200 people seeing me at a skating rink.

That's a pretty rough ride. That's his quote. And I'll bet that 200 is a generous estimate. That's what i mean that's like there was there was 200 at some point in the show but not all at once ever so uh little snapshot of 2007-8 he's uh he's an xicw ucw georgia wrestling promotions secw macw wfx secw are you catching a just random bullshit these yeah it's a hodgepodge of letters there's just a w and there's a lot there's always a w and something for extreme at that point for a while so there's an xicw he wins the xicw midwest heavyweight championship oh my

and uh also beats and beats greg the hammer valentine to retain the title who is probably 60 years old at this point wow march 2008 a wrestler named Chase Tatum dies. And he was in one of the guys when Master P was on WCW. Remember that? Yeah. He was one of the on their squad there, the No Limit soldiers that Master P had there. As soon as that shit started happening, man, it's like you are relegating your rap to like ICP level shit stop yes right it's silly but you know what they were paying him all of it you know what they're paying master p a million a year quarter

million dollars per week that he was yeah okay he'd make a million dollars a month four of those a million dollars i'd sink my career for that for a year too 250 grand to come out for 15 fucking minutes yeah i'll be there i'll be there every fucking time laugh at me i dare you i don't give a shit yeah i'll buy you that's what i'm saying i'll tell you show you what they're paying me and then he's gonna be laughing now shit so uh bagwell says because this guy died of an od i think and bagwell says quote every wrestler has their own stash of pills, and everybody partied all night and all day. I partied with him. I was part of it.

He says that he wishes Congress would intervene as it did with steroids in Major League Baseball. He said, why don't they intervene here? He said, it'll kill wrestling, but wrestling is killing people anyways. It would be a shame if Chase just ends up being another number. He described this guy as a god-fearing guy

he'd have a beer but was also would have to have his bible with him he had a super heart just a great kid and then he said he also got he was in who's your caddy by the way that guy really he was in who's your caddy and uh he was working as a road manager and like a personal assistant for big boy after that too really yeah from outcast yeah then he died so yeah who's your caddy who was in that was master p in that i don't know it was it looked really embarrassing i just remember that it's not gonna look like one of those where you're like oh god no that's not good so 2009 buff headlines some indie crap ocw here and um it's uh it's in Ohio.

And he said, Ohio's a big wrestling state. We've all done well there. Great. And he says about, this is so stupid. He's doing like, they're asking about his opponent. He's like, I mean, he's good, but he's not as experienced as me. And he's like doing like non-shoot shit. He said, I used to wrestle in front of 100,000 people and not meet one person.

Now I wrestle in front of 500 people and meet everybody. It's much better for the fans. Most want that interaction. They want to touch you. They want to say hello. Yeah, but not when you're washed up. They wanted to do that when you were 28 and actually impressive that they were looking at here. So he said, I've had to judge different styles to make the team work.

He's talking about some team. He was other teams. He was on. He said he likes being in a tag team because you can come in, do a bunch of shit and then get out and rest and come back. And everybody's always fresh, he said. So that's fun. Which makes sense, actually.

Yeah. Fresh legs makes the show better. Tickets for this are $10 in advance and $12 at the door. So there's that. Nobody else of any note seems to be on the show better tickets for this are ten dollars in advance and twelve dollars at the door so there's that nobody else of any note seems to be on the show no okay there you go moving on 2010 to 2012 here he's in um nwa restarted itself but it wasn't really anything so he's wrestling in that he's wrestling in ucw he i guess the reconstituted non-wwe version of ecw that was around for a minute he beats uh raven beats him there so um then on april 23rd 2012 he is in woodstock georgia driving yeah he calls his wife on the phone at 1 35 p.m to tell her that he was about to have a seizure while he

was driving oh he said i feel a seizure coming on okay why are you calling pull that shit over that's what i'm saying picking up the phone and calling just immediately pull over even if you're on the highway pull the fuck over and put your hazards on right yeah uh instead uh she calls 9-1-1 and she says that he's been cutting back on certain medications, and he's on a medication right now for bacteria that's in his system from another antibiotic. And she said he's trying to cut back on pain pills, but that might be what's causing the seizure. You think? He said that Buff's wife said he had a seizure before under the same circumstances.

Well, he ended up keeping driving and he ended up flipping his car several times he's driving a jeep and he flips it several times on the town lake parkway and suffered several broken bones his neck is messed up his face is fucked up he's got a broken jaw he's a fucking disaster. One car accident. Witness said that he had a lot of blood on his face and appeared almost unconscious. That's what happens when you wreck a Jeep. Yeah, you roll it over multiple times. His head probably bounced off the

fucking roof how many times? If it's a convertible top Jeep. What year is this? 2009? Yeah, I don't know what kind of car. He could have bounced his head off the fucking ground. Yeah, it might be a Jeep Cherokee, too. We have no fucking idea. It could be a Jeep Compass.

We don't know. We don't know. Jeep Liberty. We have no idea what's happening. Some piece of shit. He was taken to the intensive care unit after all this shit here. A couple days later, though, Scott Norton, his vicious and delicious partner, released a statement saying he's going to be all right.

It's going to be all right. He did still require breathing and feeding tubes, and he has to undergo surgery once the swelling in his face and neck subsides. But they think he's going to be okay. This is a bad accident. She said that he'd been taken off the breathing tube a few days later, his mom said, that he'd been taken off. He's able to eat solid foods and able to talk again and uh it's pretty fucking wild here he said that he's able to walk again a week later on may 3rd but he still has a tingling sensation and uh he stated that he had four plates surgically inserted into his face and that his jaw was wired shut after surgery. Oh, my God. That's a bad accident.

That's a fucking bad accident here. He's recovering from everything and trying. And, yeah, he's also charged with reckless driving because, you know, there is criminal ramifications for he could have killed somebody doing that shit. He didn't make a bad choice. Yeah, he really does. doing that shit he didn't make a bad choice yeah he really does uh he said that quote i don't even tell people this because it's so hard to believe but i wrecked my car and broke my neck on the exact same day as i broke it 14 years previous he didn't break his neck he had a bruise there's a bruise jesus christ that's ridiculous uh he said uh on april 22nd 1998 rick steiner bulldogged me

on live television and I broke my neck. It was the worst two years of my life. I really had a hard time getting back into shape. I was 42 at this time. This is when he just got in this accident. I'm 44 now and I think with age, along with the trauma I went through, it was the hardest thing ever.

But I finally got back and I'm back to being buff. Honest to God. I've only been back to being 100% for the last six months. It took a year and a half to get over it,'ve only been back to being 100 for the last six months it took a year and a half to get over it but i'm back to 110 you're a fucking idiot it's impossible but here's the thing uh a guy that goes through that kind of trauma and he he used pain medication to get through that i don't know yeah that's the worst thing for him this is gonna be bad well 2013 when he's back to being a hundred percent he's to being 100%, he's arrested and charged.

110%. He's arrested and charged with DUI. Yeah, of course. Again, for weaving all around the road and driving half the speed limit. Probably on pills. Assuming, allegedly, assuming he's on pills. 2014, here it is, Jimmy. This is what I've been waiting for the whole episode.

I love when we get something that's going to be talked about for the remainder of however long crime and sports goes on for in 2014 he participates in a reality television show called gigolos yes what in the fuck it follows the lives of five male escorts in las vegas he's a male escort in vegas or is he producing this no no no he's not producing shit he'll never he's not producing anything cameras also follow them on their appointments with women including all this shit this is it's on showtime in 2011 it was on for six seasons jimmy they made 54 episodes of this fucking garbage. That's how long it was on.

Is he in all of it? No, no, no, no, no. He's only on it for a minute here. But he actually does do Gigolos. Gigolos was met with critical confusion regarding the legality of the activities it portrays and amazement that women would consent to being filmed purchasing sexual services. Purchasing a 44-year-old pill addict. Yeah, he looks like he's on the episode six of

season five it's called buff bagwell and it says wrestler buff bagwell wants to try his hand at being a gigolo and ash gets into a client's fantasy so that's what happened on that episode just start an only fans buff stop this so this is pre-only fans they said well guess it gets worse jimmy i have a price list for him it's wild jimmy it's wild yeah so they has said do you actually have sex with these women on showtime and he said no absolutely not we're not having sex on camera that's not what we're doing sure it might look like it but it's a move but it's like in a movie tom cruise looks like he dies when the building explodes but he didn't actually die you gotta believe me on this i just say you gotta believe me on this i'm not fucking suspend some disbelief for a minute

he said if a woman pays for his gigolo services is he is he able to say no to having to having sex can you say no he says i'm not able to i actually do say no contractually it's no they're paying for my companionship they They're not looking for just sex. They're looking for a companion that will tell them they're pretty and hang out and be friends for a day or two days. No. And also get a dick down like you've never believed. How does his wife feel about him being a gigolo? I'd love to know. That's a good question.

He says, quote, my wife trusts me with this. That's a good question. He says, quote, my wife trusts me with this. She totally buys in and understands that we have a great marriage and this is just a decision we made to make money and Showtime loved the idea of bringing a wrestler in. My God. Would he be okay if his wife wanted to work as an escort is the next question. He said, no. And that's probably not fair.

I think that in life there's a double standard with this. There's the old saying that if a guy does it, we say big deal, but if a girl does it, then we say she's a slut, and that goes back for centuries. So he doesn't say that's wrong. He just goes, that's the way it is. Sorry. No, if she did it, she's a slut.

Yeah, you know how it is. That goes back for centuries, so it must be true. Anyway, moving on. So moving on. Yeah. I'm not a jealous. i got it i'm on this i got it how many 65 year old ladies want a fucking rim job what do we got going on here because i'll do it wait till you see the price list he better fucking be doing that oh boy he said i'm not a jealous guy i just think that in the world in general her having a husband that's

a gigolo is kind of cool but me having a wife that's an escort would be like are you kidding me i think the are you kidding me goes both ways they're pretty fucking equally sure in the fuck does that's not pandering to women or anything that's just hilarious it's not no no women's friends is like your husband's an ex an escort that's pretty cool never happened that's pretty cool man no happened. That's pretty cool, man. No, that's never been said, stupid. Wow. He is that delusional, this fucking guy. How long do you have to wait between going down on a woman before you kiss your wife? Like, how long?

Out of his fucking... Where's the pony? He's looking around. This is crazy. So, here's his actual gigolo profile. Okay. He's looking around. This is crazy.

So here's his actual gigolo profile. Okay. First of all, I have to, it's the website is old.cowboysforangels.com. Gross. Cowboysforangels.com. Cowboys. Old dot. Old dot. Uh-huh.

Okay. How our encounters work. Looking for the perfect boyfriend experience with no strings attached. We are a personal, what the fuck would that be? That is scratch my balls and play a video game and ask you to get me shit. And then you're like, this is great.

I tell you to get a tomato out of the fridge. It's on the bottom shelf and fart in your face. Is that what you want? All right, I could do that. We're a personalized male escort for women companion service that caters to the most discerning exclusive women who expect the best when scheduling an appointment you will be speaking to the owner garen james who is a true pioneer to this industry with over 10 years of matchmaking

services but you're not matchmaking they're buying someone off a fucking menu. What are you talking about? Ten years of selling B-pussy. Booking an appointment with the most elite male escort companions in the world is a simple process and it tells you to view, select a male companion

that interests you, request an encounter by filling out a form. Now, let's look at Marcus's. I can't wait to see this. There's his profile. Wow. Look at him go. He is so orange. He's look at Marcus's. I can't wait to see this. There's his profile. Wow. Look at him go.

He is so orange. He's very tan in this. He's still got the Caesar going in 2014 or whatever, which is pretty funny. Let's read his profile. The cowboy shirt and everything. Want to hear his pitch? Sure do. Marcus Alexander Bagwell grew up outside of Atlanta.

After being a star athlete in high school, he decided to take his hard work and effort in fitness and become a personal trainer. Not long after, Marcus also decided to enroll in massage therapy school, where he eventually graduated at the top of his class and holds a degree in massotherapy. While pursuing his passions, he was discovered by a professional wrestler who convinced Marcus to give it a shot.

After doing so, he was a natural. His first persona on national tv was the handsome stranger where he brought roses to the ring and handed them out to the ladies in the crowd fast forward a year later and now he signed at world championship wrestling and received rookie of the year honors that skyrocketed to his career and now longer calling himself Marcus Alexander Bagwell. Buff the Stuff Bagwell was born. Because that's what he was lying. He'd always say, I'm Buff and I'm the Stuff. That was his thing that he would say like a fucking idiot.

So he said, and the rest is history. Being watched each week by millions of fans all over the world, Buff spent over a decade on national TV entertaining the fans. A true southern gentleman. Marcus is a true southern gentleman, Jimmy. Marcus, once again, is ready to hand out a few roses and entertain you for the evening. But if that's not your cup of tea, he will forever be your Buff the Stuff Bagwell. So he can be a jerk or he can be a kind guy, whatever you're into. It is fascinating that they conveniently left out i

don't know six fucking duis uh punching a stage in the neck he's a gentleman he's gonna be he'll he will not off during dinner and you're gonna have to wipe the food from his mouth so he doesn't choke on it you know they don't put that in there they should have put at the end you drive you're driving no transportation should be the end. Must pay for taxi. Please provide Uber. This is his rate. One hour rate.

It says available at two hour rate. It doesn't do one hour. One hour. You can get them for two hours, though, for $800. What? $800, Jimmy, for two hours. Wow. $800. What? $800, Jimmy, for two hours. Wow. $800. Four-hour rate, $1,550.

Oh, it's a little deal. Get $50 off. Overnight rate. Overnight. Two grand. Two grand. $3,000 overnight. Per day.

Do you want him for a full 24 hours? Because that's just if you come for the evening and he stays overnight leaves in the morning so you know bangs you all night instead per day a whole day forty five hundred dollars for a day holy shit but he does have a weekend rate where you get two days and you get a little discount here only eight thousand dollars for the whole weekend then let's say you need it's one of those, like a family retreat and you're telling everybody you've got this handsome fiance and you don't have one for real and you need him for a whole week. $25,000 to pretend to be married, to pretend to be interested in you and probably lick

your butthole. $25,000. That is obscene. The amount of sex that would occur inole. $25,000. That is obscene. The amount of sex that would occur in that. Being honest. It'd have to be. You'd have to get $800 at a time.

You know what I mean? It's wild. How many times does $800 go into $25,000? A shitload. Like 35 maybe. I don't know. 32 times. At least 30 times, right? A shitload.

Yeah. The owner of the service told TMZz when because tmz found out about this and put it out there bagwell is already the second most popular escort on the website who's number one this guy nick hawk i think i don't know i think he's the guy from that show though he's the guy from the gigolo show i believe did he play did he play football i don't know who he is but i think he was the guy from the gigolo show i believe did he play did he play football i don't know who he is but i think he was the guy on the gigolo show i think he was one of the gigolos on that show i'm not i don't i'm not up on my like male sex worker i don't have my male sex worker cards i don't know my male prostitute cards are laying around they can say the second most popular

and he's been booked two times the other guy's been three times i don't know what the fuck that means what are the numbers that's what yeah who knows he said quote i was absolutely a gigolo that's what he says later on dude it was actually pretty wild i was a gigolo for a night no no no no i'm on i'm on this website still because i signed a piece of paper of course he's that's he's still on that website by the way that's an active profile like i said was broke, and I signed a piece of paper that allowed him the rights to put me on his website. And it's crazy. $400 an hour, $3,000 for the night, $10,000 for the weekend. And I've done one of those, and that was when me and my wife were broken up. So I got $8,000 to go to Paris, France.

Wow. That's fucking wild. I don't even know what to say about this what what does she look like though that that's who knows i'm assuming an older lady probably if it's like guys it's an older lady just like it's probably an older guy that sort of thing i mean he was talking about being in the in a hotel room in paris like over there and he was like this is amazing i'm getting paid shit loads of money to take european vacations very very strange and he said it was even weirder because no one knew he was over there but somehow out of nowhere there's a knock at the door yeah he opens it thinking it's

room service and it's not room service it is the mexican pimp guns blazing pointing right at him and he says... How is it you've come to arrive here? You are in this room. You are selling yourself? Why? Doing it all wrong. You do it all wrong.

First of all, the woman you are with, you sell her to someone. That's what you do. What? Why? Why woman you are with, you sell her to someone. That's what you do. What? Why? Why would you do this? You sell yourself. And if you're going to sell yourself, cowboys for angels. No, no, no.

You come with me. You are going to be mine. I will sell you the real way. Come on. Let's go now. No, you will come with me. I have two guns. Let's go.

And then he has to leave. And so, poof, they both disappear. Marcus and in a bottle of tequila and all sorts of shit, the Mexican pimp, they're both gone. Marcus is very confused, and the Mexican pimp has himself a new charge. A new whore. A new whore. So there you go. June 2014, he's arrested for unknown reasons i can't find out why i just know he's got arrested i found his mugshot and i can't find why it was illegal

shit something illegal it even says on multiple sites arrested for unknown reasons we're not we're not sure what exactly he did but he looks like shit in his mugshot i do know that 2015 he has in mexico selling his man pussy selling his yeah he's like i mean you can do whatever you want to my butthole i guess if you're paying eight grand 2015 he has a shoulder and hip replacement yikes that hurts that sounds painful man that's all those years being slammed one year yeah done all at once hip replacement is the most common thing for wrestlers every if you if you wrestled more than 15 years like on a nightly hardcore basis you're either in

constant pain or you've had a hip replacement one of the two rehabbing both of those at the same time that's brutal i got a friend that just did a shoulder it's a it's horrible man i don't know if he did one and then did the other i just know over the course of like a year and a half, he had them both taken. That's crazy. Then in 2016, his wife divorces him at some point. Enough of this. It's not as cool as he thought it was. No, that doesn't work out. I have a story for everybody here that I have to read for you guys. And it's a well-written story that I need to read because it really gives the sense of hopelessness

of what it's like to work with Buff Bagwell during this time period. We've mentioned him before, Sean Oliver. He's a great guy. He does kayfabe commentaries, and he writes books. Even his non-wrestling books. He's a fucking good writer. He's a smart guy. Great guy all around.

Anyway, I like him as a person, too. He's a good guy. He wrote this great book called Kayfabe, Stories You're Not Supposed to Hear from a Pro Wrestling Production Company Owner. Okay? Yeah. Because they do all of these shoot interviews with these retired wrestlers. So he's dealing with these guys on pills at two in the morning. Post everything off.

Post everything. Yeah. I mean, he sees them either being real nice guys or real pieces of shit either one so this book by the way buy this book even if you you know you don't have to care about wrestling this is just wild stories of hearing fucking crazy people tell these crazy stories so if you like our shit about wrestling episodes buy this book it's really really good so there's an audio version too, and he reads it, which helps because he does how people talk the right way. It's his writing and his words that's huge.

It's big. And I'm going to use his Bagwell impersonation from his audio book to when I'm Bagwell here. So it starts out, this is the first, this is the introduction to his book, which like I said, can't Bagwell here. So it starts out, this is the first, this is the introduction to his book, which I, like I said, can't recommend enough here. He says, quote, Buff Bagwell just told me he would punch my teeth

down my throat when he sees me in New Jersey next month. That's how he starts his book out, right? So he says, I'm standing on my porch looking down at my iPhone in my hand, the aforementioned caller now having hung up, leaving me speechless. He talks about being in the business for a while and not being surprised much anymore. It's like I've been dealing with wrestlers for seven years. I'm not surprised by a fucking lot of things that go on at this point.

I know how they operate. Yeah. He said this. He said, quote, like a dedicated explorer filling his journal for the next National Geographic piece. I've watched from the bushes, learning the howls and squawks. I know what they mean. I can interpret their language. I can read between the lines.

I know their behavior. So, yeah, he said, having said that, I was surprised. Not because a worker was acting like an asshole. Wrestlers call themselves workers all the time. Not because a worker was acting like an asshole, but call themselves workers all the time not because a worker was acting like an asshole but more so because it was buff telling me this six months prior to this phone call buff real name marcus was to be a guest on our popular show timeline the history of wcw covering the year 1997 it's a really cool show they sit down with a wrestler who was in a company for that year and they go over all the events of one particular year and ask for what they remembered about it so it's it's pretty neat actually it's a really cool

show and uh so neat that wwe stole it and does their own version of it now so uh so buff is being entrusted to cover an entire year you have to be very lucid have a good memory and be able to recall oh yeah when that happened this guy said this and that and oh it was fucking crazy and we all thought this you have you have to be able to do that right okay so he said the recall required of a guest for a successful edition of this series is no small order the series comes alive when a guest can seemingly take us back in time and regale us with the anecdotes and recollections from the road the arenas hotel room rooms and tv tapings. So makes a lot of sense,

right there. It's to discuss everything. It's a shoot interview. He said, the key here is that they remember that they, and that they recreate this moment for us. They have to remember shit. So he said,

they're set up for two back to back shoots in Queens. Okay. Right outside LaGuardia airport. They're doing like at the hotel there. Right. He said, they did one episode of Breaking Kayfabe with Lenny Poffo. Lenny Poffo, who's Randy Savage's brother. He said we'd shoot for maybe two hours, and

when we parted with Lenny, we'd do a full turnaround, meaning they would reset the room for a new set for a different series to do with Buff, and do the Breaking Kayfabe set. It's tables, it's chairs, it's lighting, everything like that. And they were waiting for buff so they're waiting for it we'll be ready to roll about 10 or 10 30 p.m buff should walk right in here it's going to be all great and get two shows in a night and get the fuck out of here as people like us who sometimes try to bang out a couple of

things in a night you know how hard that is so it's not easy no he said the plan was to have buff and he said that night he was marcus meaning not a dick he said picked up at his hotel down the road brought to us at our set when we're ready i'd spoken to him on the phone texted him a few times since arriving in queens smooth sailing everything's going well he was going to grab a bite he said and he'd be ready to roll with us in a few hours when we were done with lanny lanny shoot cool everything sounding great he said everything with lanny poffo goes wonderfully his first time working with him and he's fantastic he said now time for marcus he said except now we can't reach him oh no it's been a couple hours he's not responding to text the phone is going to voicemail he said i knew I knew the hotel he was at, so I knew where to send my crew, but I didn't know the room he was in. He said, what I did know was that there was

a bunch of wrestlers in town for a convention that weekend. There's only a couple hotels surrounding the airport that were being used for them. So he said, most of the time there'd be people coming in and out. It's a Friday night. People are going to be flying in. He said, more than likely they'd be eating and congregating in the hotel bar and grills which makes sense so he said marcus mentioned grabbing a bite so chances are he's in there let's try to track him down he said two from our road crew brian and craig jumped in the car and headed down the road he said so they're already in the room they're just waiting for marcus they send the crew out to get him he said i'm tinkering with lights he said it's tight it's an ugly room so you know it's kind of a tension trying to make

everything right and he said i've been texting and talking with him he was excited lucid polite this was only three hours ago he was excited for what the fuck happened now he's gone so he says i'm trading texts with brian is he outside brian answers nope he said is there anyone that we know there and he said i don't see anyone i'll go inside he said they hadn't worked with marcus so they didn't know what to expect or should they be concerned or they didn't know shit about it so he says is this just an inconvenience or a problem who knew he's a very good writer i'm telling you it's very funny stuff even though it's not like a comic writing it's just the way he puts stuff is very funny a matter of fact

he said in a stunning reversal of roles brian texts me that jake roberts jake the snake roberts so we did an episode on now stone cold sober is informing them that bagwell is at the bar and not in good shape he said brian explains to jake that marcus is late for our shoot so jake offers to get involved and to help marcus get on track and out of the bar. He's like, I'll try to give it a shot. So he's talking about Jake has a troubled past and obviously Jake has his own bouts of addiction

and everything like that. He said, but he did tell him, Brian, get Jake's number, of course, for later because we want to work with him. He says radio silence prevails for a time as him and his partner anthony are left in the suite which now feels like a cell i'm concerned about what's going on and i'm starting to tinker fuck around with the lights and stuff though the reports from the hotel down the road

are troubling we know better than to hit the panic button professional wrestlers and this is where again this is a comedian thing because i'm going to tell you a story professional wrestlers of yesteryear are performers to the core. We had been in enough situations where, for whatever reason, the talent seemed like they might have a tough time delivering. We've hosted the tired, travel-weary, distrustful, and cocktailed. But when the proverbial red light goes on, they snap into a zone. It's that drastic sometimes, that sudden and obvious. They flip an internal switch and become charming and interesting.

That's the name of a comedian's game. How many of you have seen me like fucking, when I yelled at that guy in Washington, fucking laid into a guy until I was a horse. And then five seconds later, we were like, hey, everybody. And we had a fucking good time. After I just eviscerated a fucking man in front of his entire in front of his entire staff right for they robbed us it's fine it's a it's not it's their fault so anyway but that's what it is like it's comics have that too i won't say his name but there was a comic i

opened up for who is a very good comic that's been doing comedy for over 30 years right over 30 years very experienced he's done everything under the sun he almost didn't go on stage because he had an anxiety attack and said it was had his face out of the bathroom going i can't come out of this bathroom in the green room and i'm about to introduce him and i'm like what do you want me to do he's like i don't know what i'm gonna do i can't breathe i can't do this oh my god i went out i introduced him 15 seconds later he came out and fucking crushed for an hour and 10 minutes like he was the greatest thing in the world he couldn't breathe five seconds before that

and he was crushing immediately so it's just one of those things he says that if they flip an internal switch and become charming and interesting marcus might be one of those gifted with the performer's gene so he might be fine yeah which makes sense so a phone rang it was brian and he says quote they have buff anthony tells me they have him he said give me the phone i take it from him brian scale of one to ten how bad is it um 11 brian says god damn it shit so then he says quote performers gene i'm hanging on to the hope that Marcus transforms when the cameras roll. Maybe he shakes off the couple beers and delivers. He's talking about there's a 60 page meticulously researched script ready to go for the show, which more sympathetic I could not be.

This is 66 pages of today that we're doing. And so he's got all of that. He says, I have crew to pay slot filled with the show on our release schedule. This has to work. He's, you know, he's made these. They're booking a, I have crew to pay, slot filled with the show on our release schedule. This has to work. They're booking a room. They have all this shit going on. He said they head out, and Anthony and I head down to the lobby to meet them. The lobby of the LaGuardia Hotel is very big, and the entrance from the parking lot is clear across the lobby from the elevators.

As we emerged and headed toward the center of the lobby, the sight emerging from the parking ramp made my knees weak. There was Marcus, being carried by both Craig and Brian. They stood on either side of him, each of his arms around their necks, with his feet dragging as he fumbled for footing. Weekend at Barney's. Weekend at Bagwell's. Weekend at Bagwell's, that's amazing. He couldn't walk,wells weekend at bagwells that's amazing he couldn't walk stumble or sway on his own buff was still in tremendous shape at the time the six foot 238 pound chiseled greek godlike specimen was being dragged by my bearded heavily tattooed crew it looked like

spartacus owed money to the sons of anarchy he said when he looked up and saw me coming toward him he kind of shoved off craig and brian making a pathetic attempt to upright himself he slurred some greeting and as we walked to the elevator i asked him to sit with me on a lobby couch for a second i gave him the premise of the show the format and how he would shoot truthfully i wanted an up-close assessment of just how impaired he would come across he couldn't walk but shit well we would be sitting could he talk that's all that i need him to do he said and i'll do an imitation of sean imitating him that's cool brother us is gonna be great he said nope couldn't talk yeah he said marcus he said i started to lean in out of the earshot from the other guys

do you want to get some coffee or something first we have all night then we can do this nah bro i'm cool let's go do this okay he said uh he said quote his speech and drool failed to reassure me and drool and drool he said what choice did i have the walk to the elevator and then the room would be a good three or four minutes hey maybe it would all wear off by then who fucking knows ever the optimist who knows no he said i walked ahead of everyone i didn't want to see my guest being carried or maybe i didn't i wanted him to retain his dignity and not have me see him being carried i don't know how he made it to the room but he did we wired him for sound turn the lights on and cameras and i said a vague prayer

to no particular deity now is the time to find out about that performance gene i launched i launched into the intro read the details about the first events and to be discussed january 4th scott hall and jerry sag shoot on each other during a tag team match. I serve up a question about that night in Shreveport, Louisiana, and Marcus returns the most unintelligible, ridiculous attempt at an answer. It very well may have been about the fight in Shreveport. It may have been the recipe for baklava. I don't know if he said flour and caramel. What did he just say?

No clue. I attempt a second question. And before long, it's obvious that this isn't going to work. He's rambling, slurring, drooling and not paying attention. I'm trying to figure out how to shut this down. There's no way I could charge someone to watch this. This couldn't go on. Makes sense.

He said, I waved off Anthony behind the cameras. I need a minute. I turned to Marcus quietly. Hey, man, this isn't working. You're not in the right shape for this. waved off anthony behind the cameras i need a minute i turned to marcus quietly hey man this this isn't working you're not in the right shape for this you probably can't tell but believe me you don't want this released he's trying to be a yeah and he said bad man this looks bad marcus said no no i'm fine i'm fine then he said just give me 15 minutes to kick out. Now, this is hilarious. I like that he said, quote, the use of pro wrestling terms by wrestlers to describe real

world situations is always something to behold. Despite the insanity of this tense situation, I was heartily amused by the term, by the use of kick out. If you don't know wrestling, when a guy's got somebody pinned and it's one, two, and then he gets out of it, that's called kicking out so he's i can kick out man he said that may be only the second that may only be second to the iron sheik referring to the man who murdered his daughter as a jabroni in a documentary that's true i've seen that he called him a jabroni like he's a wow fuck his ass and make him humble oh my god so he asked you that i'll skip over this he said he was asking uh anthony the partner He's a fuck his ass and make him humble. Oh, my God.

So he asked to skip over this. He said he was asking Anthony, the partner, what do you want to do? He said, you know, we're the co-owners. We have to decide. He said, and we can't put this shit out. If he can't straighten out, we have to shut it down. They go over scheduling options. No way to get it the next day. They're too busy.

He's not there. So, you know, it's a it's a fucking mess, basically, here. He said, we hope for a miracle and started again i delivered what must have been a half-hearted intro read the nash sag's brawl details and turned to marcus who gave the exact exact duplicate mess he served up the first time a carbon copy useless shit shit he again, I got about two questions in and told Marcus it was still pretty bad. Yeah. He didn't think so. He said, ah, that was good.

Run it. No, it wasn't. Marcus asked for more time. He reassures me that he knows how to kick out of this. I know it's over, but for his benefit, I allow him the 15 minutes. This time, he stands up for the miraculous recovery this book is just full of stories like this this is it's an amazing book it's so funny he said the wow for the miraculous recovery and walks to the far wall he leans against it places his hands by his side closes his high his eyes and leans his head back

i watch what appears to be a mystical trance like ceremony he stood there quietly we all waited in awkward silence he said there was simply no doubting science though the third restart went no better i was now frustrated and just wanted to get the hell out of there it was a waste of everything so he said he told him i want marcus not this guy he said you know he said dude you don't want your family to see this your future employers to see this right he said on my end i can't ask someone to pay money to see this he said with that marcus buried his head in his hands and began to sob oh no fuck jesus christ he said quote please brother can't we do this i need the money i need the money this isn't gonna pay 10 grand for this it's probably gonna get in 1500 bucks

or something he said he was crying real tears i felt like shit of course i couldn't continue to shoot with him in that condition and it was his fault for getting zonked but i still felt like the grim reaper he said i reached into my pocket here take this i said i press as i press 200 into his hand it's a little something for trying we'll do this again promise yeah no problem he said thanks brother you know i'm sorry he said he he said through his tears i'm sorry i assured him it's no problem we'll get this going and he said that you know i got him to call the next day from Marcus. And he said, Marcus said, hey, brother, just wanted to say sorry again for last night. Thanks for being so cool with the cash.

And I just want you to promise me that you won't give up on me and that you'll bring me back out for it. He said, Marcus, consider that money a deposit. We'll fly you back out. We'll get this done. You have my word. I won't forget about you. And he thanked me and all that shit, and it's all great. And he says, I wasn't bullshitting him.

I wanted the show. Talks about the whole thing. He said, a few months later in May, I called Bagwell. I was actually a little disappointed that I hadn't lined up the shoot sooner, but I was happy to make good. I knew Marcus would appreciate it. I called him and explained that I wanted to rebook him and get the show, thus making good on my deposit. I saw he was booked on a convention out here in Jersey anyway.

I was positively cheery in my Jesus role, offering a second chance to one who had fallen, redemption. And he was positively a douchebag. He said, ah, sorry, brother. I got a film crew coming out here shooting a deal with me and my family the payday is a lot bigger than yours so i'm gonna pass brother the money is more so no sorry he says a fury rose in me the echoes of every story i'd heard about promoters viewing talent as opportunistic leeches began to ring in my mind it was exactly this behavior the cast workers in such

an unfavorable light and comics do same way. For the most part, I had a great rapport with talent. I was wrong by this cat. I was in the red on that show and I still gave money to someone in need.

Had he forgotten the crying, my generosity, the fucking guy would be here anyway. It wasn't like he had to choose between either keeping the obligation to us or the new riveting documentary

being produced about the family buff. He's like he's going to between either keeping the obligation to us or the new riveting documentary being produced about the family buff he's like he's gonna be at the fucking convention but no this was a fuck you to my crew and our time spent jacking off in queens while waiting for him to kick out of his drool fest it was a fuck you to the 200 i I gave him to help out after being given no product but still paying all the expenses associated with the shoot. Plus, Buff's travel expenses and accommodations. I don't need to be martyred for my holy deeds. I truthfully felt it in my gut watching him break down. Perhaps that was the purpose after all. Maybe it was a personal journey type of thing.

I was tested and I was generous, magnanimous. And now this was the final part of my test. I would now be Christ-like and turn the other cheek. Fuck that, I went off. Marcus, maybe you forgot who I am, but I'm the guy that put $200 in your fucking hand after you mumbled and drooled in your fucking microphone when you were supposed to do an interview with us.

He hesitated, not a moment, moment in returning fire you yelling at me i'll tell you what when i see you in new jersey next month i'll punch your fucking teeth down your throat and you can film that and that's the end of the phone call and that's the end of the phone call that was that and uh yeah he said though uh launching into vengeance's mind mode my initial instinct is to pull the raw footage and run it for free on our site because the whole thing that we described that's all on film still cameras were running the whole time him trying to kick out him drooling crying sobbing begging for money all this shit's on camera he said to pull the raw footage run it for free on our site youtube give it to tmz and anyone else that would air it it's a damning half hour or so

of video complete with crying kicking out and a language unlike english spoken by buff in his attempts to answer my questions he honestly said at the end though he said it was a bad decision to do that and he didn't do it because he needs he said he needs other wrestlers to trust him yeah and he can't they're not they won he said he needs other wrestlers to trust him yeah and he can't they're not they won't trust him after that basically they what if someone else looks bad on a show they're going to be worried that he's going to whatever show up in jersey and film that confrontation also and then be like look man i was nothing but nice to you i'll run the footage no shit now the big doc project that he was working on yeah the good the bad and the buff

the mark bagwell journey never it doesn't even have a link on anything it didn't even actually happen nothing ever came of it um i mean that's just this is sad this is getting sad i mean that's such that's he's so fucked up he's such a mess you almost feel bad for him you know what i mean where you're like no but then he's an asshole that wasted other people's times and made them fucking waste their money and then treated them like shit afterwards it's fine to have a bad night but then don't fuck somebody over afterwards also i mean i felt bad for him the kayfabe sean oliver got fucked and his partner anthony everybody got fucked i feel bad for all these people jimmy but not nearly as bad as I feel. For Mark Bagwell,

commercial finance director, media and publishing in London, England here. What companies do you work for? I can't find it. Mark Bagwell, civil engineer at U.S. Army in Honolulu, Hawaii. There we go. He's living the dream.

Mark Bagwell, chief financial officer at Pelican Advisory Group. Would you let this guy advise your finances? No. Not this one, our Mark Bagwell. chief financial officer at Pelican Advisory Group. Would you let this guy advise your finances? No. Mark Bagwell. Not this one. Our Mark Bagwell. It's 200 bucks.

Mark Bagwell, pastor at Golden Corner Church. Nope. Don't think so. And maybe the worst one. Mark Bagwell, teacher at Greer Middle School. In Greer, Arizona? Taylor, South Carolina. Got it.

Yeah, Taylor, South Carolina. Mr. Bagwell's drooling on his desk again. Yeah. He says he'll kick out. He says he's going to kick out? We don't know what that means. In 2015, he goes on Steve Austin's podcast and claims that the reason why he struggled with pills is because he has sleep apnea.

Okay. Thelma does not treat that. The reason why he struggled with pills is because he has sleep apnea. Okay. Thelma does not treat that. He says, I have severe sleep apnea. Before, it was his irregular heartbeat. Now, it's this. I have severe sleep apnea. I did not know I had severe sleep apnea back in the day, so I would wake up and feel horrible. So, I would sedate to go to the gym.

I would sedate to go to bed. I would sedate to get into the ring. I would sedate because I didn't feel good. The word sleep apnea, nobody knew what it was back then. It wasn't a word yet. So once I got diagnosed with sleep apnea, then I was able to clean this stuff up.

What year did he say that is? He's good. 2015. 16, I'm sorry. Nobody knew about sleep apnea in 2016? Back 10 years ago, they didn't know about it, which they did.

They did. People have known about that for a long time. The girl that I was dating's dad had a sleep apnea machine in 2004. It was on The Sopranos in 2003. Right. Everybody knew Uncle Junior had one. It's a big deal. Yeah.

He said he was able to clean the stuff up, though, once he got that taken care of. But back before I was able to clean it up, it created, long story short, sleep apnea created an unbelievable drug addict. But he's good now. 2016, he files a lawsuit in U.S. District Court of Connecticut against WWE for royalties from material he's featured on in the WWE Network. They have everything WCW did for 10 years. He claimed that in the quarter one of 2016, his quarterly statement was for $64.40 of royalties. And he said he wanted more pay, and he ended up suing.

And WWE called it meritless and said that they would demand that his lawsuit be dismissed. So, yeah. 2017, he's on a show called Living the Dream. It's a TV show. It's got all sorts of weird people in it. Here's the description. Mal, Jen, and their two children swap rainy Yorkshire for a new life running a booming RV park in Florida. But it soon becomes clear that they aren't going to be living the dream they'd hoped for.

English people moved to Florida and found out Florida's a shithole? Is that what it is? I suppose. It was on from 2017 to 2019. Wow. Kevin Nash was also in it for six episodes. They must have liked wrestlers. Kim Field's also in it for six episodes.

Really? Tootie. Tootie. God damn. Living the Dream there. So also in 2017, he's in a movie called a movie called four is that a colon four colon go four go i don't know okay on the eve before halloween four escaped murderers head to the woods jesus christ with a hostage they didn't count on with an inept posse searching the wrong

area they will be lucky if they live through the weekend shot entirely in louisiana at john schneider studios do you know who john schneider is i don't beau duke is that real beau duke it is written directed everything by beau duke this is beau duke's movie 100 fucking percent also starring or also our tv show also movie also starring buff fucking Bagwell. So there you go. Also in December 17th or in December 2017, WWE lawsuit is dismissed by the courts. It's over. Tell him he's got nothing.

July 2018. He is arrested again, this time for simple battery. Not sure what happened, but he's arrested for battering somebody somewhere it's happened before may 2020 he's does a he's on cameo and he puts out a real weird cameo to somebody and uh he said it's very fun his face is all bruised the whole side of his face it's like he got hit by a truck he says he trips over he tripped over a dog and hit his face on the pavement. That's his excuse. So he's selling cameos?

Take a break, Bob. Oh, my God. At least he's not escorting people. At least put on like a Phantom of the Opera mask or something. Yeah, half a... At one point, he removes his glasses and says, quote, I got a broke face and I'm still good looking. Look at me. Do not adjust your screen.

I am still this good looking. No. He continues and raises his voice. He says, I'm about to tear my he says he's tired of being in quarantine. He was tired. This was in 2020. And he says, I'm about to tear my own house up right the fuck now. I'm thinking about putting a choke hold on my girlfriend who's the cameraman just to

end this motherfucker. I'm over it. Buff, don't say that. Don't do that. I'm thinking about beating my girlfriend so I can go to jail to get out of this. Don't. She's holding this camera facilitating me making $40. Jesus Christ.

A few days later, he takes to his Facebook account to try to explain that that's not what he was talking about. And he said at the time he was rushing through doing cameos and he was drunk. and he said at the time he was rushing through doing cameos and he was drunk and he said his girlfriend was telling him not to do the videos because he was drunk and he was doing them anyway and he was just laughing about the whole thing idiot and

yeah at the end of it yeah he says thanks everyone for their support at the end of the cameo and at the end of it he told fans they could even call him and then gave out his phone number drunk that's drunk tracy gave gave sarah her phone number from yes that was hilarious we got from love after lockup we got the now she's deceased a cameo from tracy and she fucking gave her phone number he's like here's my phone number in case y'all want to talk i am not like, I am not hanging out with you.

And now she's dead, so we can't call her anyway. Can't call her, but we did have her phone number there. We had Tracy from all after lockups phone number. It only cost, what, $30, I think? $30! $30 for the cameo? Not bad. That was a good present. Thank you for that. So, August 16th, 2020.

This is just last year. The Cobb County Police Department is investigating a serious injury traffic collision that occurred on Cumberland Boulevard, east of Cumberland Parkway. Must be in Atlanta because every fucking street is the same name. They must be all Peachtree or Cumberland. It's Cobb County, so it's Georgia. Cobb County, so it's Georgia, that August 16, 2020, at 5.18 p.m., according to investigators, a 2013 Chevrolet Tahoe was traveling west on Cumberland Boulevard approaching Cumberland Parkway when the driver lost control while negotiating a curve. Uh-oh.

The Chevrolet Tahoe, by the way, Buff is obviously driving the Chevy Tahoe. The Chevrolet Tahoe collided. It's not Tracy? It's not. It's weird, right? I was going to put her in here it's lex luger uh collided with the center median and a metal fence within the median before going through that and continuing wow this is crazy continuing west across the eastbound lanes oh my god against fucking traffic the Tahoe then hit the curb and was finally stopped when it collided with a freestanding bathroom at the transit bus station. That's how it ends for him.

He is fucking crashes into a fucking bathroom and blue water covers his Tahoe. He crashed into a shithouse. His life is literally in the shitter. It's in the shitter. Everything. It's in the shitter. Everything. It's a fucking disaster. The driver, 50-year-old Buff Bagwell, Marcus Bagwell, was transported to Wellstar-Kenniston Hospital with serious injuries. They do believe, investigators, that he was impaired by prescription medication during the collision.

during the collision. His crash resulted in multiple injuries, including broken ribs, a broken right hip, a left, broken left socket bone, a broken nose, and a torn right groin muscle.

Fuck. Socket bone. Like, he fucked his hip up that he just had replaced. It's like his hip and pelvis or something. Yeah, that's probably what it was. Oh,

man. Cobb County jail records show he was arrested, charged with misdemeanor driving under the influence of drugs, misdemeanor driving under the influence of drugs misdemeanor open container violation to um four misdemeanor charges of hit and run a misdemeanor speeding misdemeanor failing to yield when entering an intersection misdemeanor giving false name or address or birth date to law enforcement officer can't do that

three three charges of following too closely yeah three three charges of following too closely yeah three three charges of following too closely misdemeanor reckless driving misdemeanor driving with a gore or median within a gore or median or emergency lane misdemeanor duty upon striking fixed object misdemeanor driving on the wrong side of the roadway and misdemeanor license to be carried and exhibited on demand duty and fixed object that's the wow that's the shit house right yeah you have a duty to stop if you hit something that's moving you know a non-vehicle it's hilarious that duty and shit house are the same thing same thing so that's that's august 2001 or 2020 i'm sorry may. May of 2021. Jimmy, just this very little time.

Yeah. He, uh, is arrested again this time at about 1 25 PM on a Saturday at the intersection of Bell's ferry road and Santa Fe trail. This is where he near where he lives in Woodstock, Georgia. He's booked into the jail at two Oh five bonded out around nine 15. Uh,

it's we'll get to the charges four thousand dollar bond for five of the charges and a ten thousand dollar bond for the rest he is uh the a second chance bail bonds paid his bonds here he was driving his 2007 sob when yeah it's things have gotten bad for him it's a 13 year old you know swedish car. When he struck another driver's 2006 Acura from behind at an intersection, Bagwell left the scene and kept driving. Yeah. Can't do that. He's in trouble. The other driver followed him for two miles until he finally stopped.

Police were called and arrived at 1246. Bagwell was advised that he was unable to stop because his vehicle was having battery issues. I don't know how they stop. It won't start again. I mean, you know, they then discovered that he had an outstanding warrant for his arrest related to the last crash in August of 2020. That's probably more the reason he was then taken into custody on new charges from the hit and run. So he's scheduled on all sorts of shit. The specifics of what happened here. These are the charges he's booked on. OK, this is everything here. This is from 2021. Hit and run duty to stop duty of driver to stop or return to the scene of an accident. That's four charges there.

Those are for speeding failure to yield when entering an intersection, giving a false name or address or birthday to law enforcement. That's his go to following too closely again because he rear ended the guy reckless driving, driving within a gore or median or emergency lane. Again, it's like the same thing. Fixed object striking, driving on the wrong side of the roadway uh and all that that's in addition to the charges he still faces from 2020 which are all the ones i laid out to you um about a week later he has a message for his fans he does a video where he says uh you know if you're concerned about me quote thank you for your concern but i'm doing fantastic and then started flexing his body he said that uh um quote dude i'm 245 i look absolutely incredible i'm in the best shape of my life i feel better than i've ever felt in my entire life as you can see if i'm in shape buff bagwell is not hurting he said i just don't understand why everybody's worrying i just think

honest to god brother i really really am thankful for them reaching out with their prayers and thank everybody for that i just want to say i'm fine thank you for your prayers without the wrestling fans there is no buff what my story of this man's life this is fucking crazy then they talk about if you want to hear the truth about the incident on may 22nd come to the big d flea market on june 19th where i'll be there from 9 a.m to 2 p.m telling the absolute truth and anybody that and anybody that knows buff bagwell knows i tell the absolute truth at the flea market at the flea market he's gonna the big d flea market um yeah that is pretty fucking sad here um we will end

this with his advice to wrestlers okay they said his advice to kids who want to be wrestlers he was asked and he said any kid that walks up to me and says they want to get into wrestling i tell them don't don't it's just a bad time and it's because there's only one place to go tna is trying with the really not there just needs to be at least two big companies. So he doesn't advise wrestling. Can't get enough of Buff Bagwell? There are all sorts of autographed pictures of him, all shirtless and oiled up.

Become a Georgia police officer. You'll get plenty of interaction. Yeah, you get a police officer in Cobb County around Woodstock or DeKalb somewhere, you'll find him. Just look for the guy careening the wrong way across the fucking median and it's oncoming traffic. About 15 bucks you can get an autographed 8x10 of Buff here, so that's not bad. And that, everybody, is the story of Buff Bagwell.

Marcus Alexander Buff Bagwell. That's going to end bad. Oh, it's not going to end well. This just happened a few months ago. He was in two major horrific car accidents where he was shit-faced in the last two years. Within six months, yeah. Yeah, in the last year.

It's not good. It's not going well, Jimmy. Nope, he's going to be, I mean, he's going to be found somewhere, I have a feeling, unfortunately. I'd rather it be that way than him take somebody with him because at this point,

somebody's going with him. And that's fucking horrifying. How two times he shot across other lanes of traffic on a fucking highway and didn't kill anybody. I don't know how that happened. He's a lucky son of a bitch, man. He's got a horseshoe up his ass or something or a top hat on his head, some shit. I don't know how it works. But that is that.

If you enjoy that episode or any other episode, tell us about it. Tell the world about it, more importantly importantly get on whatever platform you listen on give us five stars it helps a lot helps drive you up the charts so do that in addition to that also you should uh head over to shut up and give me murder.com yeah where you can get tickets to not only all the live shows that we have our fingers crossed that will actually happen, but the virtual live show for small town murder. And I'm telling you, the world is kind of weird in the way these venues are going right now. We're not sure what's going to happen. I don't know.

We hope we hope we're not sure. So some people are I've heard people saying, like, well, I have tickets to see him in wherever the fuck I'm not going to get the virtual live show because I'm going there. That might not happen is what we're telling you. so if you definitely want to see us come here it might happen we don't know and we're not trying to get you to but we don't care if you buy it or not honestly it doesn't it's horrifying to think about what's going to happen in the next six months exactly we're more worried about that part so anyway i do that shut up and give me murder.com right now tickets to the virtual live show We promise you a goddamn good time. Have fun with us.

We'll be all shit tanked over here. You guys get shit tanked at your house and we'll all sit around. You can have whatever snacks you want. You don't have to buy like overpriced mozzarella sticks. It's going to be fantastic. Check that out. Very helpful. So do that.

Once again, shutupandgivememurder.com and tickets to all the virtual live shows and all your merchandise, too. Right. You get it all over there without a doubt. Patreon, it's cooking and it's bubbling and it's boiling over. Patreon.com slash Crime and Sports. My God, are the episodes good this week. Because first of all, we talked about the XFL for Crime and Sports' bonus episode. Wow, was it fucking fun, the XFL, hearing and sports is a bonus episode. Wow. Was it fucking fun?

The XFL hearing about all that shit, just going over all the team uniforms was funny as shit and tons of Vince McMahon impersonations and making fun of him. And then for small town murders episode, which you'll also have access to because you have access to everything that we do for $5 or above. That is our, our,

I guess it's sort of annual, love after lockup post-season rundown. It's the wrap-up of the season, which was the best one yet. It was so fun. Join the debate. Is Stan's hair real or not? Is it a bad comb-over or a wig

that's made to look like a comb-over? We can't decide. There's no way that guy didn't way pick that out of a fucking he bought that james i dude i saw that too somebody in one of the groups our fan groups or whatever pad like a thing it's it's 50 50 dude everyone's like there's no way he's buying hair that looks that bad and people are like but i you know blah blah blah but it looks like it's a fucking toupee but who would buy a toupee that looks that bad back and forth just like us we'll never know i want to get stan in a headlock and give him a noogie and i want to find out what the fuck's on

if i meet him i'm grabbing it i promise oh right away i'm pulling it right off or i'm just pulling it and clearing off his imagine if he had a full thick head of hair under there just like a great head of hair i'm gonna buy him on came. I'm going to buy him on Cameo. He's got to be on Cameo, right? And I want him to take that fucking thing off because it's not real. Whatever's on your fucking head. So check that out. Join the debate.

So much fun. Patreon.com slash Crime and Sports. Once again, everybody over the $5 level gets access to both shows and everything in them. So check all that out and do that. And you're going to get a shout out, which we're going to do in just a minute because god damn it we're appreciative and that's how we tell you so um that said also follow us on social media we're at crime and sports on twitter and facebook we are at small town murder on instagram jimmy i think it's time i need to hear the list of the greatest goddamn people who would never, ever, ever take our money

and then drool into our microphones without actually telling us anything. And then later on, not finishing our project with us. Hit me with them, Jimmy. This week's executive producers are Haley Givaldon, Lucas Stenzel, Anthony Renaro. I'm enjoying seeing the names of people that have been on this for a very long time and then just now getting on to Patreon. It's fucking rad. Nancy Weaver and, of course, Jordan Bennett.

You guys, thank you so much for everything that you do for us. It's fucking staggering. Truly. It's wild and we do appreciate it. Thank you. Other producers this week are Kia Morissette, Thomas Smith, Shida Perlman. I don't know. Shida Perlman? Yeah. Is that a person? I don't know. Rita Perlman. I don't know. Shida Perlman?

Yeah. Is that a person? I don't know. Rita Perlman? I don't know. It's Shida. Shida Perlman? I bet it's Shida Perlman.

Shida, like Rita. Yeah. Okay, there we go. Poor Carla. Yeah. Oscar Gamble's fro, Rabbi Shmulevich. I love it. Peyton Meadows, Richard Bradley.

Happy birthday, bud. Happy birthday. Frank, the South African bird washer, Lori Wilson wilson jennifer visconti jake jacob and the kenworth king they're going down to uh help uh the people in louisiana it's fucking oh wow that's great how many people good for you jeff jeff bezos has big mommy milkers james i don't know if you know that uh jennifer ward pixie de leon gabrielle Gabrielle Moore. She listened to us while hiding in a bathtub as Ida tore apart her fucking town.

Thank you very much, Gabrielle. Thanks. Hope we could comfort you a little, anyway. At least a little bit. Galen Harris, Hobbs Rentals, Hey, Would You Pinch Me? All right. Margaret Tuthill, I don't know. Tuthill?tle Yeah One of those

Kelsey Kautz Janice Hill Julian Trenner Trenner Trennerden From South Straya P.S. Way the fuck down

In Australia Wow thank you Patrice Blankenship Carl Kirshner And his favorite movie Is Rain of Friar I don't know if you know that You wanted us to know

Ashley Long Donated both ways Thank you. Linda Brilla. Brilla. Alexander. Alexandria. I'm never going to get this poor lady's name right.

Krutkiewicz. No. Rebecca. Samantha. Flaxeroni. Head. Charles Bird. Sarah Frank.

Anthony Hoare. Jory Walker. Tyler Lewinsky. Andrea Hubbard. Jeremy Cornelius. Silver-haired, middle-aged white man. Kelly Millican. Liz Bosworth, Sonny Marsden, Alex Pyle, Cooper Armstrong, Kirill Bazel, Alec Martinek, Toffee Brown, Matthew Westwood, Christopher Routier, Jody Beneshek, Kaylin Barnes, Melissa Chandler, Taco Whore. Taco Whore.

It's just Taco, but I'm going with Whore forever now. Jeremy... Pay me in tacos. With Sizzle. Eric Borzon, Borchon, what? Mystique Deegan, Brett Ross, Dennis... Larry, Tiff Ames, Corey Hale, Justin Dials, Jacob Skaggs, Brandon Footman, Joe Ellen Wagner, Jody Marshall, Sarah Sellers, Cassidy Hoare, Peter Tremonte, Bonnie J., Megan Benson, Katie Martin, Casey Bomrad, Chris Bowers, Becca Addison, Michael Donovan, Melissa Dowiash, Goof, nope, that's Ruth, Gemison,

Susan Hoare, Catherine Simmons, Joshua Gavin, Ashley Lynn, Anthony Davis, Jasper McIntyre, Cameron Clark, Joey Kirby, Karina Wagner, yes, Jeremiah Klein, Perla Alamio, Melissa Hoare, Justine McNeil, Victoria, what is this? Hoare? Yes, Tersigni, Tal Tesser, April Moyer, Adrian Paredes, Brandon Buck, Jonas Boyle, Nick Warren, Bridget Manning, Josie Brittain, Greg Wilson, Joey, nope, that's just Joe, Boudreaux, Matt Wells, Darius Mitchell, Matt Sanchez, Cassidy Burgeon, Angel John, and hell, Rhonda Conlon, Richard Graffio, Cammy Hoare, Chloe Tallman, Brennan Bailey, Mason Cozette, Jell Wickham, Marcus Jimenez, Taylor Johnson, Patrick Coughlin,

Serena Lee, Star Lahore, Azlan Ridge, Kevin Marzal, David Hale, BJ Jacefsky, Stephen Ross, Mike Atkinson, Aaron Squires, Taylor Moran, Nick Reed, Carissa Granstrom, Michael Tho, Jeff Swank, Bryson Hoare, Bethany Brown, Rebecca Procure, Tyler Dewine, Sienna Radney, GT Stratton, Kayla Burnham, Matt Goker, Chelsea Gibson, Andrew Kirsten, Angela Porch, Scarlett Matthews, Aaron Hoare, Joe Betts, Doug Jones, Mark Lampier, Michael Morgan, Justin Paragoy, Bo Hoare, Kristen, nope, that's Chris, Paniaki, Lance Hoare, Bill Potter, Brian Smith, Haley Hoare, Andrew Smith, holding the fart, are you happy now, are you proud of yourself, Garrett Schloey, Rich Russell, Ike Stevens, James Debus, James, nope, that's Steven, Beavers, maybe everybody's last name is Beavers, Drew, Drew Chikomet, Amanda Beavers, Tessa Byers, Stephan Steven, Pickton, Mark Beavers, Victoria Beavers, Adam Roda, what is this, Brody Pollard, what? Theory? Annie Wydra, Tara Bates,

Daniel Kawamaki, Ibutabultema, Alana Beavers, Chris Reedy, Daniel Osborne, Catherine Rice, Ryan Levitt, Ryan Riker,

Grimm, Christopher Volstecki, Haley Galvedon. She donated both ways. That's amazing. Wow, thank you so much. Nicole King, Sarah Ferrando, Tammy Martin, Megan Isherwood, Tamiya Collins, Sean Perry, Trey Schubert, John Carroll, Anthony Lowe, Noel Dallaforte, Adam Miranda, Dispatches from Who Knows Where, Tate Wilson, Nicole Anderson, Corey Rosser, Rachelie Turner, Taylor Jenkins, Victoria Minkin, Vi Conrad, Cole Varela, Ryan Leavitt. He donated both ways.

Thanks, Ryan. Thank you, Ryan. Jim Richard, Richmond, Sam Hoare or Sam Beavers, Ryan Waukesh, Rebecca Gilbertson, Hannah McGrath, Robin Hall, Jacqueline Brothers, and Patrick C. Hoare Beavers. Thank you guys so much. Thank you, everybody. Hoar Beavers. Thank you guys so much. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, thank you, thank you so much. Unbelievable. All the Beavers and Hoars are wonderful, and we appreciate you so much.

And you'll have to go back and listen to shout-outs before if you think we're insulting you. Not at all. It's just an inside joke based on the shout-outs that everybody has really taken to and loved. So, you know what? Good for them. This is good stuff. What if people wanted to get a hold of you and take to you and love you? How could they do that?

You can. You can do as everybody else has done and follow me at Wisman sucks. Where can they find you? They can find me at Jimmy P is funny or just just look up the show. I mean, if you Google the show, it'll tell you who we are and then you can find us that way. Pretty easy. You can find both of us and it's wonderful. So do that. Take the time follow us keep coming back every damn single week

and hanging out with us for more stories of crazy obviously they're coming fast and furious and uh we'll just say live from the crime and sports studios we will see you next week Bye. or you can listen early and add free with Wondery Plus and Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey.