Culture Apothecary with Alex Clark - "Everything You're Doing Wrong When It Comes To Dating." - Celebrity & Billionaire Matchmaker Gina Hendrix

Episode Date: June 10, 2022

Before becoming Hollywood's most sought after matchmaker, Gina Hendrix made a name for herself as a top celebrity stylist for movie stars and rockstars. Of course, Hollywood is a place where style and looks appear to be all that matter. But even A-listers long for love, so Gina traded in styling for matchmaking. Today, her elite matchmaking company has a 98% success rate. Did we mention she works with the hottest and richest men in the world? In this episode of The Spillover, Gina gives her p...

If someone asked me, have you ever been in love? I'd say, have you ever been to Florida? The home of Governor DeSantis, where the water is warm and the freedom is plentiful. Oh, have you? Now listen, my talents are not for free. They do cost you a five-star review and a subscribe. No, I'm kidding. Okay, but come on down to DeSantisland, July 22nd through 24th for Turning 4 U.S.A's Student Action Summit.

Okay, this conference is for both men and women of all ages and will feature speakers like Governor DeSantis, former President Trump, Senators Ted Cruz, and Josh Holly, Congresswoman Lauren Bober, and more. Secure Your Spot at TPSA.com slash SaaS and use code Alice. A little while back, I did an entire episode of the spillover with my BFF Lauren. And the moral of that episode was basically that before I met my current boyfriend, Nick, I had notoriously bad luck when it came to dating. I am talking, screaming, crying, throwing up in a bad way, a type of bad luck. And from my experience and the experiences of my friends, dating apps don't always help. I feel like it doesn't matter if you're on Tinder, hinge, or Bumble.

Swipe Life is sometimes just not the way. I mean, it is just a cruel world out here for us normies. But have you ever wondered what it's like to date as a celebrity, as an athlete, or even a millionaire? How about a billionaire? And no, I'm not talking about what it's like to be on Raya. I personally wanted to know. So I found a professional matchmaker who is sought after by some of the most eligible

bachelors in the entire world. Not only is she here to give us insight into what that is like, she's also spilling her tips and tricks on what we've all been doing wrong on dating apps and for the gals who brave the waters at the bars are just in life in general. When it comes to finding love, she's got the answers and all of the tea not only on dating life for normal people, but also her exclusive insight in working with A-list stars. She's an author, businesswoman, extraordinaire, former celebrity stylist and billionaire matchmaker. Please welcome to the spillover, Gina Hendricks. I actually discovered you through Heather McDonald's podcast, Juicy Scoop, Gina, and fell in love with you.

And I just thought, what a freaking woman. Like, she's truly doing it all. And I was like, what a wealth of knowledge. Kutervatives, you know, the girls that listen to my show are just going to want to ask you so many things. So the first thing is, for those who haven't listened to you anywhere else or aren't familiar with you, could you explain what attracted you to professional matchmaking in the first place?

Like, were you setting up friends a lot when you were younger or how did you get into this. So I think the full story is just to tell everybody, I've had three careers. So I was a flight attendant for Delta Airlines for nine years. Then I was fascinated by fashion and style. And so I reinvented myself and became a top celebrity stylist. And I did that for 10 years. And then I just, but while I was styling, I was like a lot of ladies and I or younger girls. And I was reading romance books. and I was reading self-help books on love and dating. And I was obsessed with the topic. And I was obsessed with dating.

And then at the time, actually a neighbor introduced me to online dating. It was very early stages in the early 2000s. And she was like, oh, check out this site. You know, it was called matchmaker.com. And then there was match.com. Those two were the only ones that I knew of back then. And I thought, this is such a cool idea, the dating site where you can meet people that you might not normally cross paths with.

So that actually sent me on this, and I don't know what possessed me, but it just sent me on this mission where I said I wanted to start my own online dating site. And I had been setting up friends and, you know, like a lot of people do. And I've always been a connector. So I'd connect people with animals,

connect people with jobs, connect people with people. I just love connecting. And so I went on this journey from like early 2000s to about 2007 of trying to start my own online dating site. but I didn't have a clue about starting a tech company. I was, anyway, and so finally a mentor of mine, he said, Jeannie, you know, you've been trying to do this for a while. Why don't I think about being a traditional matchmaker?

And, you know, that was a little bit smaller than I was envisioning. I was going to conquer the world. And but it also resonated with me. And so I just, I don't know, I was right time, right place. And I just decided to fully commit. I was tired of the ups and downs of the styling world, even when you're a hot, top celebrity stylist, it's sort of up and down. And so I went all in. And I just reinvented myself yet again as a matchmaker. But I didn't know at the time I was going to specialize in billionaires and

celebrities. I just wanted to help everybody. How did you get into only specializing in billionaires and celebrities, though? Is that because you already had a clientele with them from styling? No, not really. I mean, I certainly I knew, you know, it's sort of, I think, you know, and I try to mentor other women who want to be matchmakers as well. And, you know, and I, it's, it's sort of the, you know, what comes first to the chicken or the egg scenario. And, you know, it's like you can't be a matchmaker, really, if you don't have the people to set up with the clients. And it's like, well, do you get the people to set up with the clients first? Or do you get the clients? And so I, I fortunately, I always did know a lot of beautiful women. Certainly that goes hand in hand with the

business I was in from styling. I knew celebrity ladies and I knew models. And so when I was meeting these men who were looking for matchmaking, I took a small business loan. I ran a few ads in like some strategic places. But what I found is that even if the men didn't really have like the big bucks, And I didn't even know what big bucks were back then. I didn't come from money. There was a whole new world for me. But, and so, but they all wanted like top level ladies, you know, like even if a guy didn't have, he wasn't, you know, anything that great.

They just all felt like they deserved like supermodels, you know. And so as I went along, I think I read something that said, you know, the, the middle is always overcrowded, but there's always so much more room at the top because so many people just never aim that high. You know, they sort of stop at the middle. And that really resonated with me. And then I decided I just took a leap of faith. So started the business in 2008, struggled from 2008 to 2010.

2010, I decided to crank everything up to 100, raise my prices. And once I did, really, that kind of changed the game. Like, it brought in better clients. Those guys at that level weren't trying to nickel and dime me. You think it was just because of the exclusivity of your service. costing a lot more that drew in these people that were wanting to pay more? And it's usually it's all referral based. Well, actually, let me tell you how that happened.

So what happened was I knew these gorgeous models and I started Googling type of clients I wanted. Like I would Google, you know, a billionaire bachelor's, most eligible men in L.A., you know, whatever. And I came up with this list, like a wish list that I wanted of clients. And so when I would go and interview these women who, who had filled out profiles for the database, I would just say to them, hey, do you know any, do you happen to know any of these men?

And a lot of these women had dated them before or ran in those circles. And they'd look at my list and they'd go, yeah, I know him and him and him. And I said, well, here's the deal. If you, because they'd be great clients for me. And if you give me their number, their cell number, I will call them, but I will never tell them how I bought their number. And I will give you a referral fee. I mean, I still give a substantial referral fee now because my whole business is built on referrals.

But I just don't call anymore. Now it has to be a proper high. Here's Gina, meet her, whatever. But back then I had to kind of be covert. And I mean, I was calling like celebrities you would know, billionaires you would know. And sometimes it would take a few calls to get them on the phone. Like Paul Allen, he's dead now, bless his heart. I never became a client, but he was a huge billionaire.

there. And it took me three years. I had his number. And I would call off and on. And one day, one night, I was like sitting on the, laying on the couch. And I was like going through old numbers. I was like, hmm, because he never answers the phone. It's like, you never going to answer the phone. And I like hit it. And he goes, hello? This is Paul. And I was like, Mr. Allen, hello. And I was like, I had to like get in the game. But that's how I started, you know, a lot of trust from these women. And there would be some occasionally that, you know, of these. guys that were leery or or just weren't interested at all. And that was fine. I would never call them again. Like I've never been that like past or anything like that. I make the call.

I tell them what I do. And either they were interested or they weren't. And yeah, that is literally how I built the business. How are your matchmaking services different than the competition or the people that we've seen on reality shows and things like that, that dude matchmaking? Right. So, you know, I think, I think it all comes down to integrity and taste. And also for me, I am genuine when I say I'm very particular who I work with. And I think a lot of times matchmakers, they get caught up in the game of trying to get everybody as a client. And so the way I say it is that I think that the majority of matchmakers, they focus, like, I would say, 90% of their efforts are on the sales angle, getting the clients, getting the clients, right? And then 10% is focused on finding the

match for those clients, whereas I'm the exact opposite. Because I only work with a few clients anyway, I continue to raise my prices, so I only have to work with fewer and fewer. And so 90% of my business is scouting with myself and a team that I have for the women for my guys. And then the 10% is like, okay, yeah, sure, I have room for another client now. you know, but I'm not, I'm not one of these like, sale, sale, sales. It's like, I run a pretty great business at a very high level, so I don't really need everybody as my client. So, and your primary clients are men, right? That's your client. Yes. Those are the people who pay you are the guys. Yes. I mean, I know you cannot give names of who your current clients are, but are these people

that we would have seen at events, you know, this year like the Oscars or the Met Gala? Metgala. Yes, you've seen some of them at the Oscars. One of my guys was a judge on Shark Tank, but he was like a guest judge, and this was many years ago. They own sports teams. You read about them in papers. Some have been political figures. Yeah, they're all kinds. Oh, let me ask you this. So because this is, this is juicy. All right. So the people that you work with that are clients that are political figures, is that harder to matchmake when they may have opposite political views than you? I mean, I wouldn't say that that is any harder than anybody who just has specific political

views in general. You know what I mean? So I think everybody, especially, you know, since Trump and the thing we've seen the last several years, I think sort of people have become very specific and in their partner and the politics of their partner. You know what I mean? So I don't think it's specific to anyone who works in politics. I think it's kind of a lot of.

of people who are very specific about that these days. What are the types of things that these billionaires or just the A-list stars are looking for in women? I mean, do they say they need to have as much money as me? I refuse to date anybody that, you know, doesn't have a certain fame status. Well, I mean, I think that everybody's particular about looks, of course. But, you know, I find honestly, women are just as particular. So, you know, I think it's easy to say, you know, point the finger at men and say, they're so picky or judgmental, but honestly, I find women are just as picky and judgmental. So everybody is. But I say that beyond the looks, they definitely my guys, they want, they don't want someone who's just a pretty face. I cannot even set up just a pretty face with my guys.

They have to be smart. The more accomplishments they have, the better. The more educated they are, the better, you know. And it varies from clients. client, you know, in terms of some want, if they've gone to, some, especially if they've gone to Ivy League schools, want an Ivy League partner. But some, some might not have, have that kind of education, but they have a lot of accomplishments. So they do want somebody who at least owns their own home, for example, or, or has certain amount of accomplishments. It just makes them just a little above the rest, you know, or much more above the rest. Do you think Hollywood client, compared to, like, if you were matchmaking in middle America, put less of a focus on religion than someone might that's outside of Hollywood?

Yeah, you know, it's interesting. I have actually had clients all over the world. So I've had them in Florida, New York, in Baltimore, and, you know, Utah and everywhere, and Paris and Dubai. And it goes in phases, you know, because I only work with seven to eight clients. And so it changes. Some people are on my roster. Right now I'm going through a younger phase. My youngest client is 25 and then 28.

Now, why would a 25-year-old, who I imagine, he's at the peak, he's at the peak of his life right now. I mean, that's a great age. Why would a 25-year-old need to hire a matchmaker? And he's so cute and tall. He looks Swedish, kind of. He's like this cryptocurrency wizard. But you know what? Honestly, there's no difference in why a 25-year-old would hire me.

me or a 60-year-old would hire me, which right now I don't really have that many older clients. I'm in a younger phase. But it's the same reason. It's not because I refuse to work with any man that has trouble with ladies, right? Why would I want to represent somebody that's going to be a hard sell? No way. I don't have to. I only have to the clients. Well, I can be very picky. So they have to be cute. They have to be like, it has to be great that the women are so excited to meet them, all those things. And why they hire me is because usually a few things. they can because they can get vetted options because I go and I actually meet everybody in person if they're in L.A. If they're not, I at least do a Zoom. I spend the time to really get to know

the person more than if they bumped into the metaparty. They would know nothing about them. They don't know somebody's agenda. They don't know somebody, you know, they just don't know. And then the other part of the problem is, like especially with my younger guy, his circle of friends. I mean, he's running like with the Elon Musk's and these kind of people. And they, and they, yeah, a lot of them want to set him up, but then it's awkward if he doesn't like the person they're setting him up with, you know? And so a lot of these guys don't want to date necessarily in their social circle because they don't want to have to tell their best friend's wife, yeah, I just don't think she's cute enough, or, you know, her legs aren't long enough, or she wasn't smart enough.

Like, they can't be honest like that with their friends, but they can be honest like that with me, you know? Well, you bring up Elon Musk, and one thing that is just so weird to me, I've never been able to wrap my mind around is his relationship with Grimes. That Grimes situation, right? Yes. Like, okay, if Elon were to have hired you, is that a type of girl that would have been on your radar for him? That's just so odd to me. Well, the thing is, I have to follow the marching orders of my clients, right? Now, if a client, if a prospective client came along and he said, you know, oh, I don't, you know, I just want a girl with big boobs and I want to pay her bills and I, you know, I wouldn't, work with that guy, for example. But if a guy like, you know, Elon or any of those people came along

and they were specific, like, I want her to be, you know, artistic and quirky and, you know, whatever all the lists that Grimes is, then, yeah, that would be somebody I would have to find because that's what they say. But then there'll be times where I'll find that girl and I'll be like, my honest opinion is that don't personally like her. She doesn't get back to me on time. She's not very nice. I just don't know about her intentions. So within the scope of. of what my marching orders are. I then will tell them she's, I think she's great. I would pass on her, even though I know you might like to meet her,

you know, these kinds of things. I don't necessarily understand the Grimes thing either, but she is, listen, what we do, and Elon's never been a client. I do know women who've known him and dated him. But, you know, his first wife, the one he had like the five boys by or the four or five boys, she's an actress. He seems to like those that are in like music, the arts, acting. He likes that.

But I think at the same time, just because they are like an actress or a singer, I don't think you should underplay probably how smart these specific women are. You know what I mean? Just like who Harry married, you know, Megan, she has an Ivy League degree. She's not just an actress from a TV series. She has an Ivy League degree. You know, so I think there's more that we don't know behind the scenes of a lot of these women that they pick. Have you ever seen those girls at big southern schools on TikTok who deck out their college dorm rooms to look like five-star luxury hotels?

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Well, speaking of things we don't know behind the seed. So one thing, Gina, that you wouldn't know, but my listeners know is I cannot stand Megan Markle. I think that girl is manipulative. I think she exhibits all of the signs of they've got a strange dynamic in their relationship that she's controlling, that he doesn't seem truly happy. What is your take on their relationship? You know, I honestly have not done a deep dive about it.

But, I mean, listen, you can't escape. the stuff on the media. I mean, definitely of the two wives, I think the other one, what's her name? Kate Middleton. Yeah, Kate. She seems very grounded and legitimate. I think Megan Markle, I mean, she's just put into a very hard position, too, of being really just even physically being such an outsider, just in every way, such an outsider

to this situation. I mean, but then it's also, you know, because I do work with a lot of people who, whose families come from money and their family is extremely protective who they end up with and very judgmental. So it's also interesting that he would choose her given just given the upbringing and everything. So you have to almost believe that they're truly in love and but navigating these strange waters because it definitely didn't make life easier for him. I just think it's got to be a red flag. If you've got a woman who always cuts ties with her immediate family, then she's cutting ties with friends,

then she's cutting ties with your significant others family. Like she's always alienating herself and everyone around her from anyone outside of their relationship. That seems a little weird. Yeah, I agree. That seems weird. But I also think that the media, and you know, you're in the media to some degree. But you got this great podcast. But I think, you know, we can be so manipulated too by the media.

You know, they spoon fetus and they make things look the way they want them to look. True. I just, you just never know what really goes on behind the scenes with people unless you're there. So I don't know. I don't know. But it does seem like he's devoted to her. But it's hard. Yeah.

I don't know. I don't know. Have you ever sat down with a potential male client who, you know, people were really saying, you got to work with this guy or he wanted to hire you. and just immediately you got weird vibes. You were uncomfortable. You thought there's something off about this person. A couple times of, you know,

I've gotten better and better as I've gone along at, like, you know, I can see three people very easily after just at least one or two meetings and tell people what their issues are, you know, all these things. What are some of the things that they were doing that you were like, that's strange? Well, I mean, you know, it could be anything from somebody who's speaking very negatively about women and just being goal diggers and or or you know what's it's weird but and maybe some matchmakers do this but um you know they'll say like well do you pay these women to go out like with your clients and I'm like well of course not I'm not in that business like you know my guys could go and pay women

off on their own if they do that or if they want that they wouldn't have to hire like an actual matchmaker or so if a woman if a man's like you know it's just really talking negative or seems a bit misogynistic or ridiculously picky. Like her hair has to be this length, but beyond her shoulders, like, cooom stuff like that. Like, yeah, I'm not going to work with that guy. He's just not for me, you know? Do you go through your database of women with your male clients present?

Like, okay, let's look at this catalog. Like, does anyone here catch your eye? Like, how does that work? That's a great question. So in the beginning, like the first stages of talking to a prospective client, I absolutely will show him like pictures based on what he tells me first. I will show him some pictures of some women that I think he might like. And honestly, it's more of me testing him to see who resonates with him, the type that resonates with him.

Because, you know, listen, I have some mind-blowingly gorgeous women in my database with master's degrees and doctors. I mean, they're gorgeous and they're amazing and whatever in Victoria's Secret models. And it goes on and on. And so if a guy were going to come back to me and say that he doesn't think any of them are pretty enough, we got a big problem. Wow. We got a big problem. Yeah. I wouldn't want to work with that guy because I don't even know, like how anybody would be able to help him, you know?

Yeah. So, yeah, I have to show them pictures in the beginning because I have to understand what I'm, what I might be in for. You know what I mean? Now, does a woman get to see a picture of your client before she goes on a date with him or does she go in blind? No, no, no. I think, and I talked to, you know, I've helped a lot of women get their money back from other matchmakers, to be honest with you. I say, I jokingly say I could create a side separate business helping women get their money back from other matchmakers. Because they just take their money and it's very hard to help them.

And also another, it's also a red flag if a matchmaker is not going to show you a picture of who she's going to set you up with. They're playing games. They're not being honest. And what they're trying to do there, even if she's, she hasn't paid the matchmaker as a client and she's just like a woman in the database. If the matchmaker's not willing to show the photo, well, I mean, let's face it. We know why, right? I mean, I love this.

Why she wants to get that girl in the seat with that guy so that then she can just count that as a match. And it's just essentially, it's a waste of everybody's time. But, you know, the women that work with me and are in my database or fill out a profile for me, the premium profile is like, you know, we have a lot of trust we've built. And even though those women aren't like my huge paying clients, I look out for them as well. So I care about the ladies, and that's why they trust me.

They refer other women to me. You know, I deeply care about the women as much as my male clients. What would you consider an extra rock star quality in a woman when you're trying to set her up? Oh, which is one of your clients. Well, probably a master's degree or a Ph.D. That would, you know, assuming that everything else is equal. Like if you have two women who have an amazing body and they're gorgeous, what would put one up above the other? Education. I have a fascination with SpongeBob SquarePans, Gina. Do you think that would be interesting for one of your clients?

Perhaps the right client. Okay, so has there ever been like a super weird niche quality that a guy was saying, I am looking for a girl just super obscure that has this one specific thing and you had to really search to the ends of your earth to find? I mean, listen, there was a time way back when and I was working with a pretty famous plastic surgeon. And as we worked together, he didn't tell me in the beginning, but as we started working together, he started like really getting specific about the shape of her butt, of a woman's butt. And I'm just like, I am not a butt hunter. Like I can I'm not, like I'm now inspecting women's butts. Like that's I'm not, that's just not what I do. But then I, but if I'd

known that ahead of time I wouldn't have worked with him. There's a guy that's been around, I think, to a lot of matchmakers. And he's approached me a couple times. But like he has literally such a long list of criteria. But, and one of them is like he talks about like the circumference of the top of her arm. Like that's just gross to me. Like that's super weird. It's so weird. You know what I mean? So, um, yeah. So I just think, but most matchmakers would say, yes, sir, yes, sir. Give me your money. I'll do it. You know what I mean? And then it bites them in the ask because they're not going to be able to make that guy happy. Well, I think that speaks to your integrity also as a person, that you don't just take money for

anything. Are these clients that you work with typically averse to women with children or don't mind or just completely depends on the guy? Completely depends on the guy. So like my younger guys, you know, if they haven't had a family yet, they don't want somebody with kids. Obviously, they want to start a family with someone. But then my other guys, if they have kids, they don't mind. But some guys are okay with like women with, you know, it's interesting. I was talking to my assistant about this. It's just every client's a little different.

So, like, in my, in my lifetime in doing the matchmaking, I've had clients where they would prefer that the dad is out of the picture altogether. So I guess potentially no drama. But then some won't date a woman unless the guy, the dad is in the picture. Some want to date somebody who's, if they have children, they're older. Some want the children younger. Some want more kids. It's just all over the map.

It depends on the guy. Yeah. Can you talk about what a. love fraud is and how men and women can spot a love fraud trap? Yes. So if, yes. So if you want to talk about like, are we talking more specifically? Because I have a few like ebooks and blogs floating around.

So I could talk about everything from the Tinder swindler stuff, which is a love fraud, to those men who display, you know, toxic behavior out of the gate and get you reeled in. So let's do the ones that reel you in out of the gate. Okay. So I think the ones that would get you on the hook are the ones. And actually, you know, this kind of happened to me early on even when before, right before I became a matchmaker. And he was a really famous celebrity, very famous. But that's going to be in the memoir. So I won't fully disclose everything. But like in his case, you know, he would send me text. He would do, you know, these are guys that would give you just enough to keep you on the hook, but not enough to ever show up. and really date you. And then if you call someone out on it, like say, you know, oh, well, you never called or we never ended up going on that date. If you call them out on it, they then paint, paint you as the bad guy.

Yeah, as it as gaslighting, is if you're being mean to them. And you're like, I don't think I did anything wrong, but then they try to convince you that you did do something wrong. And so you start questioning yourself and then you start tip, tiptoeing. on eggshells and it's all like it's literally like these guys it's like a playbook these guys do it over and over and over and it's once you know the the behavior i mean they they're not even original it's just the same behavior over and over with you know they you know they're not making an effort to see you they're not making an effort to really get to know you as a person it just it

doesn't i i tell the women too like if it doesn't feel real he's not showing up he's not doing things for you. He does, you know, then it's not real. You know, it's not real. If a client hits it off with a woman on the first date, does that mean that your job is done or how long into the dating process do you stick with them as their matchmaker? I mean, listen, I'm always here to help because I find that a lot of people will end up hitting that first speed bump in the relationship. Everyone does. And what's cool a lot of times is I've been able to get them back on track. It doesn't happen all the time, but a lot of times the smart move is when the woman keeps in contact with me. Because once I kind of set my guys up, like we've been buddies and we've had this great

relationship, but then once I get them set up, I kind of don't hear from them anymore. But then if the woman is smart, she keeps in touch with me. She stays, you know, on my radar because she'll say, Gina, this happened. What do you think? And because I know him so well, I can kind to guide her. And a lot of times I have guided things back on course. One couple ended up, got engaged and then got married. And another couple moved in together. And another couple got engaged and married as well. And so I was able to really guide them. But I wouldn't have been able to. The guys, they don't keep in touch with me as much as the ladies do. And it's a smart move. The ladies who don't ever follow up with me or keep me in the loop, it, listen, I can't say,

they don't know what they don't know. But the thing is, they should lean on me because I've got the inside scoop. I can really help them. And so if there's things going on with the relationship, I'm just a really good resource for them to utilize. Well, what I love about you, Gina, is that you're just so direct and forward and blunt. And so that makes me wonder, have you ever been so honest and blunt with a client or a female that you were set? up with the client that they just could not handle the truth. And they were like, I can't even work with you because they were just so offended because you just told them, told them how it was. Yeah. I mean,

I've had some women who got offended when I was straight, really straight with them. I think these days, most people know what they're getting into with me because they probably watched my TikTok videos or, you know, seen, you know, TikTok has changed the game. It's put me on the map here. I've been so under the radar all these years. But now people kind of know how I am and they appreciate it. They like it. But there have been times like, you know, I even had a client many moons ago. And he just pushed me to the brink where I just, a couple of them have where I just had to like be really honest with them. And the thing is, you know, a lot of times with celebrities and the super rich, they aren't used to having people be very honest with them. They don't necessarily like people being very honest with them.

Because the thing is most, if you think about it, most wealthy people and celebrities, you see, they have people in their circle that are all constantly on the payroll. So those people's livelihood depends on their weekly paycheck. So they can't say anything. But me, they pay me up front. So I already have their money. So it's not like they can fire me. You know what I mean? Necessarily.

I've already got their money. My livelihood does not depend on like a weekly paycheck with them. So they do get honesty. It's part of the deal. I have to be able to be honest. I did have a billionaire. I'll tell you a funny story. I haven't told anybody yet.

But I had a billionaire years ago who it was the weirdest billionaire ever worked with. He was nice in a lot of ways, but it was the weirdest situation. So basically, and he was very specific about the ladies, they all are, but what happened was he wanted me to find and scout the ladies like I do, pre-qualify them like I do. And then they had to meet with his first assistant and then his second assistant. They had to go through those two channels before it was a yes for him to meet them. But I had to just tell him straight up. Like I don't work like this. That's not going to work for me. Wow. How bizarre. I mean, that really is like a job interview process. That was weird. Yeah, that was weird because here's the thing. A lot of times, again,

you know, these personal assistants or who are, who are gatekeepers in a different, I'm a gatekeeper, like to these guys' hearts, I say, but like they're gatekeepers to sort of like, we don't know their agenda. They may not want another woman coming in. Do you know what I mean? My agenda is clear. I want another woman coming in. I'm trying to help him find love. But I can't get. guarantee those assistants, their agenda is pure. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, it sounds to me like the clients that you work with and stuff and the women that you procure for them or I don't know, the right verbiage for that. But it sounds like the women that you work with and the men that you work with are all very physically attractive. Is there ever, I mean, is there ever a point where

you think we need to have a little bit more wiggle room and how attracted physically we are to somebody or does that really matter a lot? Like, are you ever setting up guys with women, for example, that might be a little overweight or you try to stay away from that? Are you trying to get me in trouble? I'm just looking for honesty. I'll always give you honesty. I, again, I have to follow their directives. I have to follow their directives. And I guess I'm a pleaser because I really like to make them happy and get them what they want. And I think this is why a lot of times they renew with me. It's very unusual for a client, a matchmaking client to renew for another year. But my guys, a lot of times they stick with me because they know that I'm so particular and that I do a

good job. They just know that what they're looking for is so specific and difficult that they know they're hard. So they don't, but a lot of times people move on to other matchmakers. But not my guys. They almost always stay with me. So I either get them into a relationship or they renew with me. me. But I'm not going to dodge the question. But it varies. Like I've had clients who want a little curvier. I've had clients who want, you know, bigger boobs. I've had clients who want a flatter chest. You know, I mean, but everybody really probably wants somebody who is fit. But I find the women, same thing. They want a guy who's super fit too. They don't have women telling you like, I like your dad bod clients. Never. No, never. Never. See,

that's so funny to me because I feel like all I'm 29 and I feel like most of my friends are like I'm into dad bod. Maybe in theory, but maybe if he has a dad bod and looks like Chris Pine or something, maybe. That's fair. That's fair. Always something. What are some signs that women can look for in men who maybe seem like they're good guys, and they come across as datable, but you know right off the bat, Gina, you know as a matchmaker,

these are guys that are never going to commit. I think if he doesn't really have his life in order, if he doesn't have his career in place, I think if he's not, I think one thing that women kind of don't pay enough attention to is, you know, a lot of these guys, especially if they're good at, like, playing the game, they will try to impress a girl by bringing her to meet their family,

their friends. But a lot of times with these guys, that doesn't mean anything. The friends and the family have met so many women along the way and their mom has to play along. And they all have to put on that face. They're thinking, oh, another one, you know. But I think what really matters is when the guy wants to meet her family, her friends, right? So he's willing to do that kind of effort and get to know them and really genuinely get to know her. That's really somebody who has a little bit more depth and it feels like he has a little more depth than he's willing to do the work.

that shows to me that somebody's a little more substantial, you know? Should there be a three-date rule when it comes to sex, in your opinion? Like, should you go three dates before having sex with someone? What do you recommend to your male clients? Well, listen, I tell the guys that, you know, I tell everybody just to, I like everybody to take it slow because, listen, these guys, and when I say these guys, I don't necessarily mean my clients. I just mean guys.

they will sleep with a woman if they have the opportunity a lot of times. But what I've also learned is that the men who are more serious about a woman are less apt to rush her into bed. And I've learned that from my guys. Like if they don't, you know, and it's in the past. I'm not working at any guys like that right now. But I have had clients and that taught me a lot where, you know, one specific client years ago, turned out to be a little dushy.

And again, this is before I knew better. But he would rush women into bed when. he did not see a future with them, which is shitty. And so now usually I tell the women, I try to, I try to, like if I know something about a client or how he is, I saw, I will never tell her this is how he is, but I'll just be like, well, you know, you really should take it slow. And if they want you to come back to their house, you know, as a rule, just never do. You know, I try to give her general advice, but I'm kind of trying to prep her for just, just, you know,

just to be on our toes about things because I think sometimes it's very easy for a lot of these younger younger girls especially to really get swept up. You know, I don't like it when my clients show them their house or show them all the toys or cars they have and stuff because it's sort of like, you know, as women, we've been raised with this like this fantasy of wanting the, you know, Christian Gray and wanting the prince on the white horse. And so when these guys, you know, basically give these women a ticket and show them the Willie Wonka factory. And then they don't give them the Willie Wonka factory. It's disappointing.

And so I just don't want my guys to, I just don't want my guys to get the women's hopes up for anything until it becomes a little more real. But what I tell women, when it comes to sleeping with a guy, bottom line, just had this discussion last night. So I have a private group for women called Badass and Brilliant Women on Facebook. And then I did a live event last night. And, you know, this one one was talking about how she's dating this great guy. and we're all excited and stuff.

I just did a TikTok about it. And then she ends up saying that, you know, she's sleeping with him, but she doesn't know if she's in a relationship with him or not. And she doesn't even know. She found out that he was dating woman for four years and didn't see a future with that woman. Okay. And I said, well, would you be sleeping with him right now if you knew he didn't see a future?

And she said, no. And I said, well, then you shouldn't be sleeping with him. Do you know what I mean? So it's not about three days. or three dates or any of that stuff, it's about if you can sleep with them and they never call you again or it doesn't work out, then if you won't get your feelings hurt, go for it. But if you're doing it as an investment into what you think is a relationship and you're hoping to move this into a relationship, then you have to wait until it, you guys have

had a conversation of where you guys are, you know, because a lot of times guys won't talk about it unless, you know, maybe you're in the moment. That's the time to bring it up. Hey, you know, this is fun and everything, but I'm really looking for a real relationship. You know, you have to have to have the conversation. I'm not currently single, but if I was, I think my current opener on a dating app would be, do you have good meat? Do you have good man meat? What do you think I'm talking about?

Obviously, I only want to date a man with the moink meats. That's moo plus oink. Moink has become my secret little lover because the moinck difference is a difference you can taste. Shark Tank host Kevin O'Leary called Moink Bacon the best he's ever tasted, and I stand with Kevin. Lucky number seven, Kevin. Choose the meat delivered to your door in each box like ribbys to chicken breasts and even lamb or wild-caught salmon. Also, don't worry, you can cancel any time. Times are tough, especially for independent farmers in America, who Moink works with.

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Like, do they give you weird random kinks and things like that? you've got to look for in women or you say, hey, the sexual stuff, you are on your own. I'm not doing that. Yeah, they are on their own. And if they do say something like that, I just ignore. I just ignore them. I don't pay attention to that. I just keep doing what I'm doing.

You figure that out because I did have one client once that started getting weird about like STDs and stuff and saying he was a big celebrity. And he was saying, you know, Gina, you really should, you know, make sure that these women are tested and you should make sure that ask them if they've ever been sexually molested, like that. And I was just like, oh, like first of all, it's really none of my business to ask. Second of all, they might not be honest with me. And that's just so personal. To me, like that whole, like what happened to you as a kid, that is something that should come up in a conversation between people as you're getting to know each other. Well, that also seems like a therapist job, not a matchmaker,

job to be asking people about their childhood trauma. Right. No, no, no. And regarding the STD thing, I mean, while that on the surface, like, because I do take people's suggestions and things to heart, because I'm always thinking better ways to match people, better ways to do things. But when thinking it through, the reality of it is, I could meet with a woman. I could require her to submit and, you know, give me a clean bill of health type thing, right? But who's to say she won't then go and catch something between when I meet with her and when she goes out with my client or sleeps with my client, you know, so there's no guarantees. And this is why a lot of the, you know, the matchmaking sites and dating sites don't do a lot of this stuff as well because it gives people a false sense of security.

If I said, oh yeah, I saw her, I saw her test, it was clean. And then my guy goes out with her, but then, you know, they don't sleep together for a couple weeks or whatever. Who's to say? She's, you know, it's still the same situation. So that just is beyond my skin. scope, I think. I think, again, that goes hand in hand with two people when you're starting to get into it, but getting intimate. I think it's a great way to actually pre-qualify. Are we really taking the sex seriously? Are you clean? Have you been, let's get tested together. You know what I mean? And then I think both people are on the same page with the seriousness of where they're at with everything as well. I have to pick your brain about Kim Kardashian and Pete Davidson's relationship. Yeah, and I've done to talk about that too. This is so mind-boggling to me. I agree. I feel like there are a lot of similarities that Pete has to Kanye West with mental health issues, mental health struggles, all of these different things that clearly played a part in the demise of Kim and Kanye's relationship.

And yet, she's dating this man who has a lot of the same, same, you know, mental health disorders and stuff that Connie did that she didn't like in Kanye, but she's giving him a chance. and, you know, bringing him around her children, he's a lot younger than Kim. He's already got her kids initials tattooed on his neck, which I think is shocking for like, you know, what, six, seven, eight months of dating. I can't, I can understand that he's funny. You know, people talk about this is like, you know, super whatever. This is just super out there. But like, they say he's got that.

Yeah, the magical pain or like, you know, BDE, big dick energy. Like people say that that's. you know, the magnet to him and his sense of humor. But at the end of the day, Pete has been very honest and open himself with the public about how, hey, at the end of the day, like, I have suicidal thoughts and I'm dealing with a lot of dark stuff. I can't imagine as a mother why Kim would want to bring him in to her kids' lives long term. So, I mean, I'm just like over-analizing everything, but I'd love to hear your thoughts. No, I agree with you 100%. It's all very, very strange. I my initial thought and I was actually thinking about it today my initial thought was that

and I'm still not convinced that wasn't the case that maybe you know the Kardashians do a lot and Chris Jenner's a genius they do a lot of strategic relationships you know what I mean and so in the beginning I was thinking you know it was some sort of strategic PR stunt yeah absolutely and it could have started out that way that's a lot of people theorized too that it started out that way you know now he's got a new series. He ain't a deal for a series. So it's worked for him. She's always pushing all the stuff she's got going on. But I do think maybe something along the way did switch. And they did perhaps fall into this, you know, a romance thing. It's never going to last. I am shocked that she would have him around the kids. I think when it comes to him tattooing himself,

and I has said this somewhere else, listen, somebody with that many tattoos, another tattoo means nothing. Do you know how quick you could cover up those initials with something? I mean, they do that stuff all the time. So the tattoo thing to somebody who's already so heavily tattooed really means nothing. I think it's all shock value. He's not like her type. It's interesting that you'd bring up the mental health thing. I hadn't thought about that overlap.

But I just, yeah, it's a strange, it's a strange, strange, strange thing. I don't know. Could you ever see her going back with Kanye? Is going back with an ex ever worth it? So I think the only way going back with an X works is if two people have done work on themselves over years, years, and you come back as different people. You know what I mean? I think that's the only way. I don't think a year breakup or a few months or weeks or days and then coming back to you, same people, same problems.

I think, you know, again, like this even, I don't even know, honestly, if the Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck thing, even though years have gone by. I'm not into that. I don't think that is actually going to sustain itself. I mean, he's like a smoker and she's like into healthy living. It's like, I just think sometimes celebrities get caught up in the media of it all and the press. And I think they buy into it as much as we do. And then they have to be strategic about, oh, God, now it's going to look bad, bad timing for a breakup. And PR people will say, just make it work, stay together for a little while.

you know, there's again, so many things behind the scenes, and we're also manipulated by it all, and we buy into it. But yeah, I don't know if, I don't think Kim will ever get back with Kanye. I think he's really jumped the shark on that one, for sure. He's done so much that I don't think you can come back from. What is a celebrity breakup that just wrecked you, Gina?

Like, you were devastated to see this couple breakup. Oh, I would say Jason Mamoa and Lisa Bonnet. Ooh, that's a good one. So why, what is it with that? Do you think they have a chance of getting back together or why do you think they didn't end up working out? I don't know. You know, I did a TikTok about that too. And some people were saying horrible things about him.

I've never heard those horrible things about him. Like horrible things. But, you know, there's a lot of conspiracy theorists and people get cuckoo, cuckoo, especially on TikTok. But I don't know. I mean, you know, I do know people who know her. And she does live in Tupangangan Canyon. She is very much of a home body.

You know, she's, and his career is just taking off. And he's loving it. He's living the life. So, you know, I just think, uh, I just think for that reason, probably their lifestyles haven't worked out. I mean, I probably also think there's people behind the scenes. There are other partners involved that we don't know about, um, probably almost certain. There's almost very, very rarely do people ever split up.

celebrities if there's not somebody else secretly involved. You know, I was theorizing that she may have found a woman. Like I like that wouldn't shock me. You know, she's so different and and and just she's just very different. But I don't know. I don't really know what the deal is. We have to ask a couple dating app questions just because this is kind of, I feel like one of your strengths is navigating the dating app stuff. Yeah, I love talking about the dating apps because, you know, I only get to work with so many few people, so few people. for private matchmaking, right? And so I want to be able to help. That's why I set up these coaching programs for women and all this side stuff I do with

women to help elevate them to a level. And I just keep pushing them onto the dating apps because I know great guys are there. So, yeah. Okay, well, that's, I mean, that's encouraging to hear you say that there's great guys there. So what is the most common dating app mistake that women are making? Well, women and men are. showing up with just low-level photos. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, I call it potato quality. What do you call it? Potato quality photos. Okay, sure. I would agree with that. It's sort of like,

the way I try to position it for people is, is like you have to understand that the dating apps these days, it's like the Olympics of dating, right? And so if you were ever even going to compete in the Olympics, you would never try to compete in the Olympics without proper planning and, you know, proper equipment. in and having everything you need to compete in the Olympics. Yet people show up on the dating apps competing in the dating Olympics because it is, it's everybody's vying for the best looking person, the most eligible person. But yet they're showing up with like pictures that maybe their friends or family would appreciate, but that's not going to make them pop off the page.

You have to really elevate yourself to a level where your photos are like, this guy's got, oh my God, she seems so phenomenal. I've got to meet her. Not like, yeah, she's okay. You know, she's okay. But yet the majority of people, and men do this too. They're just like phoning it in with like these haphazard photos. It's just. Men and the pictures of fish. It's a problem. Fish thing is a is a big problem. But the other thing is if it's so specific that it's a fish, he may actually land a lady, get a lady on the hook that's into the fish, you know, and then she's going to be the right match for him. Now, okay, on apps like Hinge and Bumble,

what is more important you think, the written prompts, the photos, or the details that you write in an actual bio about yourself? What's the most important thing to focus on? The pictures. The pictures and then your bio, and then it's who you are choosing. I think another big problem,

on the dating apps is that people are in this mental state where they think they have to appeal to everyone, right? They think it's a popularity contest. They think they want everybody to like them. So then what happens is their profile ends up being generic. So like the fish guy, for example, it does help him, believe it or not, even though the majority of women don't hate the fish thing, but that's great because he's weeding out all those women

that would hate his fishing lifestyle. You know what I'm saying? So I think the more specific you can be on the, in your bio, I want women to really elevate themselves. And so many women, I know even when they fill out private profiles for me, they like phone it in about their career. Well, I'm in marketing. Meanwhile, I know that she's like VP of marketing, that she climbed the ladder.

Like substantial men who are looking for real relationships, they want a woman who has achieved a lot, who's proud of what she's accomplished. And I think women really tend to kind of play that down a lot, especially in their bios and all of this. And because they don't want to turn any guys off. But the thing is, they need to turn them off. If they want to attract the very, very best men, then they need to make their light shine as bright as possible.

So they intimidate the hell out of the ones that can't step up. Why don't men follow up with women after they match? And how many times should women kind of like their stuff or try to get their attention if they haven't interacted with them yet on the app? Zero. Yeah. Because the thing is, The thing is, and I had my own dating app for a little bit, we tested it, and I kind of underestimated

the ladies. They are more picky than I even thought, and I know how picky they are. But anyway, so I think that basically what I know is that the guys will go and they'll just like this, they're not even looking. They're swiping, they're matching, they're harding. They're doing all this stuff. And it means absolutely nothing. It means nothing.

But the women think, oh, my God, this guy matched with me. Oh, it absolutely means nothing. All right? It's like a guy like winking at you in the car. Like it's just the lowest level effort possible. He, you know, and so what happens is when you match with them and then it's like, that's when he will usually go and then look at your pictures, do a deeper dive or read your information. And that's when then he decides whether he's interested or not.

So then the woman a lot of times, she'll like write to him, especially on Bumble, she'll just write him because they're under the impression that women have to write first, which technically they do, but the way I do it and talk about in my book, The Great Manhunt, I have a whole strategy. And part of the strategy is that like when you match with the Mon Bumble, even if you match with Brad Pitt or Chris Pine or whoever the hot, cute guy is, Idrisalbo, whoever you're into, even if you match with them, if they did not extend the time, you must just let them go.

You let them go. Oh, you mean extend the time on Bumble, how you can extend the time. Yep, because a guy who's truly interested, I say it separates the men from the boys. So any guy that's like hot for a woman, and this is what I know about men, because they're all sitting here in my brain, all these guys are all here. And there is not a woman that they're excited about or hot for that they would ever let get away, ever let get away. But it also begins with your pictures. So if your pictures are average, the guy's going to put an average effort. going to have average interest. So first you've really got to elevate yourself with your

photos and make sure you're like standing out, even if you're not the best looking, even if you're not, you know, the thinest or whatever, you can still shine way brighter and have your pictures just more like pro level where it's just, you just look like you're in a in style magazine, like a five page spread and in style magazine. And then the guys are going to really step up their game more. But if he's not extending the time and he's willing to let you go, then that is a great way to pre-qualify these guys who have just swiped on anybody. And they're not really... I love this.

I love tips and tricks on how we can just... And playing the game, I know people are like, it's not a game, but like, you know, play the game better. Play the game smarter. I like it. I love strategies like that. Okay, in your opinion, do you think that people find love because of fate or because they make intentional decisions that result in a suitable partner?

I think it depends on the age. I think if you're in your 20s, I think it's fate. And you can, you know, fall over a stone and meet the perfect person, right? I think dating gets harder as we get older. And the older we get, the more conscious and proactive and intentional we have to be. 100%. I think it's hard for me because I have friends like this who are in their later 30s or even early 40s who are quite a bit older than me.

And I know their heart and they're also dropped a gorgeous. they're super successful and they are just genuinely some of the best people I've ever met, but they still haven't been married. They still haven't found the one. What keeps a person single like that? Oh, gosh, so many things, you know, I think, I think it's so many variables involved. I think it's in some cases people, you know, a lot of times if you've dated a celebrity or you've dated somebody at that level, it's very hard to ever date less than. But, you know, and so time moves on and you're not still that same person that was dating at that level. And so you can't maybe continue to date at that level, but that's where your standards are.

So there's that or there's timing where you're just focused on your work and you're not willing to make the time to meet somebody. Or, you know, it's just, there's just there's not one reason. I think it's different for everybody, you know. Maybe you've wasted too much time on a guy that ended up breaking up with you and now you find yourself in your late 30s. And in dating, again, only gets more challenging the older you get, you know. Do you believe in the one or do you believe in multiple someone's? I believe in multiple someone's. I think we evolve and we change.

And I think there's the one at different times in our lives. You know, there might be the one when I was in my 20s and then there might be the one that's in my 40s. I think it changes. Where can people find you, your services? or if they even want to wonder, if they're wondering, hey, am I a girl that would be eligible to be on Gina's roster? A couple things.

So they can go to my website, which is Gina Hendricks.com, and click on the women's tab. And there I do get women two options. There's a way to fill out a basic inquiry. And then there is a premium profile that they can fill out. I do charge a nominal fee for the premium profile because then what they get is they get me on Zoom,

where I walk through their profile with them and I say, you got to fix this photo, you got to fix this photo. Because over the years, there's been so many women over the years who fill out profiles for me. And their pictures, again, just are not happening.

And then I've gone in behind the scenes and fixed it for them so that they could get dates with my clients. And so I just, you know, I just want to be able to help more people and I don't want to do it for me. So they have the premium profile option. The basic inquiry is really just, it's just a toe in the water,

but it's not really going to get them in my database on my roster. But they have their options. And then how they really get my help where they want to book a call or read my books or my coaching and all the stuff I offer is the greatmanhunt.com. So the great manhunt.com. And then I have a free Facebook group for ladies called Badass and Brilliant Women. And women are joining that thing like crazy. And we're having all these conversations.

It's not meant necessarily for dating. It was meant to elevate women in all stages, phases of their life. lives, entrepreneurs, single moms, married, whatever, just being your best badass self. But because of TikTok and my subject matter, all the women are coming in from TikTok and they're just constantly talking about dating stuff. And I try to jump in and give my words of wisdom as much as I can, but they're having a lot of fun over there. What is your TikTok? TikTok is matchmaker Gina Hendricks.

Okay, perfect. Gina, you have been a blast. You have been a blast to have on this bill over so much fun and just thank you so much for coming on. You know what? You're awesome and you're doing awesome work. I've listened to several of your shows and I think you're great and I was just honored to be asked to be on. So thank you so much. Was Gina not just the most cool, down to earth type of person that you'd want to be like your big sister or your mom? Like I just wish that I could have her number and just text her anytime something happened. Like every little thing that happens with Nick and I or, you know, whenever I was single, just to have her as like, you know, a professional helper on my dating life would have been, wow, that would have been pretty much

a game changer, I think. But the good news is she has so many resources out there that we can take her up on if you really liked her from this episode and want to learn or know more. Or like she said, you know, hire her to go over your dating profile and tell you what might be going wrong for you, what you could be doing wrong. So look, dating in this climate is literally terrifying. I am very happy that I have found my fish in the sea. But for those of you who are doing the dating dance, swiping in the apps and dodging duds, I hope this makes dating a little bit more fun, a lot less complicated. And I hope you enjoyed the tea on Gina's Insight on some of our favorite or not so favorite celebrity couples.

For Need to Know content like this, make sure that you click subscribe so that you're the first to know when episodes drop. Then leave us a five-star review. Tell us how much you love Gina's advice. The spillover is back next Thursday in 9 p.m. Pacific, midnight Eastern on Apple Podcast and Spotify, or you can watch the episodes. on the Pop-Lix YouTube channel. I'm Alex Clark, and this is The Spillover. Love you, mean it.

Bye.