Dissect - S2E13 – Hell of a Life by Kanye West
Episode Date: November 7, 2017We continue our serialized analysis of Kanye West’s My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy by dissecting "Hell Of A Life." Follow Dissect on social media @dissectpodcast. Purchase Dissect merch at dis...sectpodcast.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Hey everyone. As we approach to end of season two, I'd love to feature your voice on the upcoming finale episode.
If you're interested in being featured, just follow these steps. First, formulate your thoughts on Kanye West.
They can be about twisted fantasy, what you learn from season two, a certain song that affected you, or just your thoughts on Kanye in general. The floor is yours.
I know it's a big subject, but condense your thoughts into 30 to 40 seconds of audio. I suggest writing your thoughts down. You can say a lot in 30.
seconds, you just have to be organized. Also, feel free to state your first name and where you're
from. Next, use your cell phone to record yourself. Once recorded, send your clip to dissect
podcast at gmail.com. Entitle your email, Season 2 audio clip. Again, send your 30 to 40 second
audio clip to Dissect podcast at Gmail.com. Finally, many of you have been asking about the
availability of the Dysect Season 1 Kickstarter book, The Black or the Berry. For limited time, you can now
order that book at blackerberry dash book.com. And if you have no idea what I'm talking about,
this book visualizes the historical and social context of Kendrick Lamar song The Blacker the
Barry. I wrote the text and graphic designer Hannah Sellers created beautiful collages to accompany
the text. It's really quite gorgeous. Again, you can order yours at blackerberry dashbook.com.
I also have links on my social media at Dissect Podcast if that's easier. Okay, thanks for your time.
Here's today's show.
Welcome to Dysect, long-form musical analysis broken into short digestible episodes.
I'm your host, Cole Kushner.
Today, we continue our serialized examination of my beautiful dark-twisted fantasy by Kanye West.
On our last two episodes, we dissected the album's emotional nine-minute centerpiece runaway,
bringing us to the end of Act 2, titled Dark.
After the imagined suicide that ends power and the funereal interlude of all the lights,
Kanye wanders through the various facets of his psyche,
in search of identity and companionship.
He embraced the villain role on Monster,
realized the ridiculousness and somewhat loneliness of celebrity life on so appalled,
and search unsuccessfully for intimacy on devil in a new dress.
On Runaway, we found Kanye is most vulnerable,
acknowledging for the first time his imperfections,
an inability to love or be loved.
The three-minute solo that ends Runaway
is my beautiful dark-twisted fantasy's grand moment of catharsis,
a man desperately struggling to find his own voice,
attempting to break through the distortion of his own inadequacies,
abstractly expressing all the feelings he's incapable of articulating with words.
In a typical literary narrative,
this kind of cathartic outpouring of emotion
is usually followed by a liberating action,
defining revelation or newfound clarity in the protagonist.
On Twisted Fantasy, this happens, kind of.
Whereas a traditional story tends to lead towards resolution
or a quote-unquote happy ending,
Twisted fantasy just gets more, well, dark and twisted.
Indeed, Connie's emotional liberation allows him to freely express the darkest recesses of his psyche on the album's next track,
the first song of Act 3, and the subject of today's episode, Hell of a Life.
Hell of a Life is produced by Kanye West,
with additional production by Mike Dean, No ID, and Mike Karen.
The song's production revolves around a sample,
from the Mojo Men's 1966 performance of She's My Baby.
This sample is slowed down slightly and becomes a foundation for Hell of a Life.
Drums are then looped beneath this synth, sample from Tony Joe White's 1970 song Stud Spider.
The opening measure of this piece is chopped in looped to create this pattern.
And with that, we get something pretty close to the drums on Hell of a Life.
For a song with so much energy and driving impetus, the production is actually quite minimal.
It's terse simplicity made affected by the tight,
pristine tonal quality of the synth and drums. And before we get too far into our analysis of
a hell of a life, it's important that we back up just momentarily to the end of the album's
previous song, Runaway. There's a very interesting, and by interesting, I mean brilliant,
connection between Runaway and Hell of a Life. Let's get the end of Runaway in our ears,
then we'll talk about it. Runaway ends with Kanye's voice turned guitar resolving down to an E.
That's nothing out of the ordinary. The song is in the key of E major, so ending on a E is a very
standard traditional resolution. Now let's hear Hell of a Life's opening synth riff. Doesn't this
sense sound pretty similar to Connie's voice at the end of Runaway? Let's listen to the two back
to back. The two sound pretty similar, right? Things get even more interesting when we consider
the interval between the concluding note of Runaway and the opening note of Hell of a Life. In music,
an interval is the distance between two notes. We typically talk about intervals within their
respective key signatures. For the sake of this example, we'll position ourselves in A major.
If our two notes are three notes apart, A to C, we call it a third. If they're five notes apart,
A to E, we call it a fifth, and so on. Like I mentioned, runaway ends on an E, and how the life
begins on a B flat. Let's hear the two back to back. Sounds kind of spooky, right? This notoriously
dissonant interval is called a tritone. The tritone has a long-storied history. It was frequently
avoided in medieval music because of its dissonant quality. By the 18th century, it was said to be
banned from use by some religious authorities. It became known as Diablus and Musica, which translates to
devil and music. Devil, you know, like hell, like hell of a life. The ending note of runaway and the
opening note of hell of a life exploit this tritone, this devil and music, to great effect,
sinister transformational rope swing from the elegance and vulnerability of Runaway to the sinful
aggressiveness of Hell of a Life. With the tone of Kanye's voice on Runaway and the synth on
hell of a life being so similar, it's hard not to speculate that this transition and its use of
the tritone was a conscious calculation. We've come across too many details like this on Twisted
Fantasy for them to be mere coincidence, especially when we consider Kanye's obsessive, detail-oriented
approach in the studio, as well as his team's high level of musicianship. And we've
Before we dive into hell of a lice lyrical content, which centers around Kanye falling in love with
the porn star, there's just one more thing we need to address, Kanye's porn addiction.
Kanye's interest in porn is pretty well documented, with Connie himself admitting, quote,
My only drug is porn, I have porn with me all the time, unquote.
And it seems as porn addiction is a manifestation of his sexual addiction, which he's also on record
saying he struggles with.
Quote, I think I might have a problem, a sexual addiction, lest is part.
of the reason I've been out of relationships. I just want to do it all the time, all the time,
like four times a night, and then in the morning. Those addictions and afflictions are what make me a
great artist. My biggest problem is lust, looking at girls with big booties, unquote. Indeed,
Connie would go on to create Yeez-Sys and the life of Pablo, albums that in many ways center
around Kanye's struggle to both find and commit to emotional love in the face of perpetual
lust and temptation. On the latter half of twisted fantasy, we're
We're getting a similar mini-narrative with devil in a new dress, runaway, hell of a life,
and next blame game.
Kanye seems to be searching for meaning, for intimacy and authenticity.
That authenticity takes form as woman, as love, and we're privy to the prismatic display
of the emotional peaks and valleys of Connie's psyche as he tries to figure himself out.
Of course, Connie's struggle with love and lust is also an expression of good versus evil,
angel versus devil, a dichotomy we've seen reappear throughout the entire album.
After the angelic purity of runaway, Connie enters hell of a life on what seems to be the other side of the thematic universe with his performance of verse 1.
Connie Be It Just Fell In Love With a Porn Star
Torn The Camera on, she a born star
Torni
Connie begins
In a cornice to the Cpia
She gave that old nigger
Osa
Bittersweet taste made his go too late
Un Make a knee shake
Make a priest faint
Unm
Connie begins verse 1
I think I just fell in love
With a Porn Star
It's the third song in a row
In which Connie seems to be searching
For some kind of emotional connection with a woman
On devil in a new dress, he yearned for his sensation.
On Runaway, he addressed a quote-unquote good girl.
And here on hell of a life, his attention turns towards a porn star.
Indeed, the opening line has shock value, but it also sets up the complexity of the song's
thematic through line.
Typically, we lust after porn stars.
Rarely do we fall in love with them.
After the rejection of his sensation on devil in a new dress and the self-rejection of Runaway,
It would seem that the lonely and emotional estranged Kanye has grown desperate in his pursuit of quote-unquote love.
But as we'll see, that perception will change by the song's end.
Connie continues the verse, turn the camera on she had born star, turn the coroners in a foreign car, call the coroners do the CPR.
She gave that old N.ward an ulcer. Her bittersweet taste made his gold teeth ache.
In just five lines, Connie creates an impressionistic narrative that makes clear we've entered some unnamed recess of his
fantastical imagination. The picture he paints as a porn star involved with an older man, who seems to be
quite wealthy, signified by his gold teeth and foreign car. The old man dies from an ulcer given to him
by the porn star, perhaps a metaphor for her being bad for his health. Connie continues the verse
with a series of sacrilegious lines that extend all the way to the verse's end.
Kanye says,
Like we want a sweet steak.
We headed to hell for heaven stakes, huh?
Well, I'm a levitate.
Make the devil wait, yeah.
Kahnie says,
Make her knees shake.
Make a priest faint.
Make a nun come, make her cremate.
It's a virtuosic series of lines.
First we have,
Make her knee shake,
alluding to praying on one's knees,
and the convulsions one has during an orgasm.
Make a priest faint continues the religious imagery,
as the priest is likely to faint from the vulgarity
of the line, or how good the sex is. We also imagine faint as in faint in color,
alluding to the priest turning pale during sex. Next, Connie flips it female, saying,
make a nun come, make her cremate. Again, we have double meaning with cremate, one being cream as
an orgasm, and the other being cremate as in the ashes after one's death, both apparently due to
how good the sex is. The clever wordplay continues here with the line, move downtown Coppa sweet space.
Here Connie pulls off a triple entendre.
First, we move downtown as in moving into a new expensive crib or sweet space.
Secondly, we have cop, as in police officer, going downtown to the city jail.
Of course, the third meeting is most obvious, going downtown as in going down on someone,
the sweet space being their genitalia.
Connie ends his verse acknowledging the recklessness of his fantasies, saying,
Living Life Like We Won the Sweepstakes, we headed to hell for Heaven's Sakes.
while I'm a levitate make the devil wait.
It's a well-executed punctuation that cements the verse's religious overtones
and Kanye's risque juxtapositions of heaven and hell, sacred and sin.
The last line is especially nice,
as Kanye claims he'll temporarily escape the grasp of the devil by levitating,
perhaps alluding to the ascension Jesus took after the crucifixion.
Along with the verse's double and triple meanings,
there's also some virtuosic double rhyme schemes established throughout.
For much of the verse, Kanye splits each bar in half, and he'll rhyme the middle of one line with the
middle of the next line, while also rhyming the last word of those same lines as well.
For instance, he says, turn the camera on, she a Bourne Star, turn the coroners in a foreign car,
call the coroners do the CPR.
Here are the middle words, camera on, corners, coroners, all rhyme, while the ending words,
Born Star, Foreign Car, and CPR all rhyme as well.
Later in the verse, the middle words start to rhyme with each other within the same line,
as he says, Old, Ulcer, Sweet Taste, Teethake, Knee Shake, Priest Faint, None Come, Downtown, Levitate, Wait.
This first verse of Hell of a Life is really quite masterful.
It's extremely intricate and tightly executed, all displaying the dark recesses of Connie's twisted fantasies.
Hell of a Life continues with the first performance of its hook.
The melody
No more drugs for me
Pussy and religion is all I need.
The melody Kanye sings on the hook
interpolates the 1971 song Iron Man by Black Sabbath.
Kanye borrows both the melody and opening line of Iron Man
for Hell of a Life's hook.
Connie sings, have you lost your mind?
Tell me when you think we cross the line.
After lines about priests and nuns forticating with a porn star,
it's hard not to think Kanye's being self-referential.
to his own explicit first verse.
The hook continues,
No more drugs for me,
Pussy and religion is all I need.
Of course, verse one is filled almost exclusively
with talk of sex and religion,
albeit very non-traditional religion.
Stating that he doesn't need drugs,
it seemed Connie is using drugs as a metaphor
for a clouded reality,
and perhaps a play off the phrase,
Love is a drug.
Now that he's found clarity in sex,
and through sex has found a religion
that allows him to express his innermost sexual fantasies
without fear or judgment, Connie doesn't need drugs, doesn't need the traditional love he sought
on devil in a new dress and runaway. The hook concludes, grab my hand, and baby will live a hell
of a life. While on the surface it would seem to be a romantic image, the phrase hell of a life
is a triple entendre. The traditional meaning of hell of a life is exciting, full of adventure,
which is clearly the surface meaning in the context of the song this far. But hell of a life
can also mean a hell or shit life, one devoid a meaning and authenticity.
Finally, hell of a life can mean a sinful life, one fueled by lust and temptation.
By the song's end, we'll hear all three of these hell of a life interpretations manifested.
After the performance of the song's hook, verse 2 begins.
Never in your wildest dreams. Never in your wildest dreams.
In your wildest, you hear the loudest screams coming from inside the screen.
You a wild bitch.
Kada do to be that guy, set a price go down, gee up a fuck a black guy,
or do anal, or do a gang bang.
It's kind of crazy that's all for sitting the same thing.
Well, I guess a lot of niggins do gang bang.
And if we run trains, we all in the same gang, runaway slaves all on a chain game.
Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang.
Connie opens verse to half singing, never in your wildest dreams, never in your wildest dreams,
in your wildest.
This would seem to reference the 1996 Tina Turner and Barry White classic Wildest Dreams,
itself a song about lust after the sun goes down.
Connie alters this quote of the Tina Turner song,
as it continues the verse,
Never in your Wildest Dreams in Your Wildest,
you can hear the loudest screams coming from inside the screen,
you a wild bitch.
It would seem Connie is addressing the porn star he's watching on a television or computer
screen, confirmed by the next line,
tell me what I got to do to be that guy,
who we've presumed to be the male porn star currently having sex with a screaming female.
Things take an unexpected turn as Connie responds to his own question, saying,
she set her price go down if she ever fuck a black guy, or do anal or do a gang bang.
It's kind of crazy that's all considered the same thing.
Connie's alluding to the well-documented racism in the porn industry,
specifically that many women in porn often charge twice as much or more to do a scene with a black man.
Connie draws parallels between this fee increase,
and the increases to do more extreme sexual acts like anal or having sex with multiple men at a time.
The porn industry standard for these extra fees would seem to equate being black as inherently explicit,
inherently degrading, which of course carries with the horrible, racist implications.
Next, Connie delivers one of the most intricate sequence of lines in his entire discography.
He flips gangbang from a sexual exploit to modern street gangs with the line.
I guess a lot of N-words do gangbang.
Next, Kanye says,
And if we run trains, we all in the same gang.
This alludes to another sexual act of running a train,
which according to Urban Dictionary means a lineup of guys having sex with one girl,
one after another.
The phrase,
We all in the same gang,
is also a clever allusion to the 1990 anti-gang song
We're All in the same gang,
by the supergroup West Coast All-Stars
that included ICT, Dr. Dre, E, and many more.
So since we all talk the same slang,
Stop killing my brother because we're all from the same gang.
Don't you know we got to put on a chance because we're all in the same gang?
After saying if we run trains, we're all in the same gang,
Connie says runaway slaves all in a chain gang.
This line cleverly links both modern day racism and gang banging back to their origins in slavery,
as well as the chain gangs of southern prisoners who were forced to do manual labor by chain together.
The runaway slaves line also gives new meaning to the previous line, we're all in the same gang,
which now can be read as meaning the gang of being black in America, united by the commonality
that they're all discriminated against. The verse ends with Kanye saying bang five times.
Here we have a complex quadruple entendre and a brilliant thematic exclamation mark to the
verse's end. Coming after the chain gang line, we first think of the banging of something like
sledgehammers against steel, something signifying physical labor.
Coming after runaway slave, we can also interpret the bangs as gunshots from a slave owner
toward an escaping slave.
Of course, the bang of a gunshot would also apply to the gun violence common to urban gangs
mentioned earlier.
Finally, bang could allude to a few sexual acts, the thrust of a man's body, or the train
line of men waiting to have sex with the woman.
Personally, I always find this passage to be quite depressing.
Here on hell of a life, Connie is indulging in fantasy, letting his imagination run
rampant in a cathartic exercise of self-expression. But yet, even in this imagined environment of
his psyche, he can't escape the looming reality of being black in America, can't escape the
history of his ancestors, or the momentary insecurity that his skin color may affect his ambitions
and fantasies. After a repetition of the song's hook, verse three begins.
One day I'm going to marry a porn star. We'll have a big-ass crib and a long yard. We'll have a mansion.
And some fly maids
Nothing to high
We both screw the prize maids
You want a role play
Till I roll over
I'm gonna need a whole day
At least road doja
What party is we going to
On Oscar Day
Especially if she can't get that dress
Some Oscar Dave
Lorenta they wouldn't rent her
They couldn't take the change
That's the dress off her back
And told her get away
How could you say they lit
They live their life wrong
When you never fuck with the lights on
Fuck with the lights on
Fuck with the lights on
Fuck with the lights on
Fuck with the lights
Connie begins verse 3 by stating,
One day I'm gonna marry a porn star.
A slightly prophetic line is his now wife Kim Kardashian
gained prominence partly because of a leaked sex date.
But on hell of a life,
the motives of Kanye's love interest in porn stars
begins to reveal itself as a verse continues.
After fantasizing about their sex-filled life in a mansion,
he says,
Nothing to Hide, we both screw the bridesmaids.
The key phrase here is nothing to hide,
and this theme of personal liberation and uninhibited self-expression
will carry through the verse until its exclamatory end.
Connie says,
What party we go into on Oscar Day?
Especially if she can't get that dress from Oscar de la Renta.
They wouldn't rent her.
They couldn't take the shame.
Snatched the dress off her back and told her get away.
Here, Connie outlines a scenario in which his porn star wife is shunned and shamed at an Oscar award party.
This section parallels the latter half of verse two,
as again Connie's fantasies can't escape the reality of discrimination and prejudice.
Where Connie was shunned for his skin color, the porn star is shun for a profession,
which the public perceives as a shameful and desperate life choice.
And it's this shared public shame that seems to attract Connie to the porn star.
They're both outcasted from society, and Connie can identify with and relate to our struggles.
This sentiment is epitomized in the verse's masterful closing lines,
how could they say they live their life wrong, if you never fuck
with the lights on. This line snaps the entire song into place, crystallizing precisely why Connie
both desires and identifies with the porn star. Connie uses having sex with the lights on as a metaphor
for unabashed self-expression for the unconditional embrace of one's own self-and sexuality.
Those who exclusively have sex with the lights off implies insecurity and discomfort with themselves
and their own self-shaming sexuality. It turns out that a disgust with porn stars is rooted in their
own insecurity, a projection of their own anxieties as they feel threatened by someone so comfortable
in their own skin, so comfortable that they don't mind not only having sex with the lights on,
but having sex on camera for the entire world to see. As an artist and celebrity, Connie is
essentially doing the same thing. In his music, he expresses his emotions and feelings freely
and works that the whole world are privy to. Coming off the heels of Runaway, this theme is especially
potent at this point in the album. Also, as a celebrity, the specific
of Connie's personal life and issues are often public information, and it's this kind of exposure
and vulnerability through his music and the media that caused Connie to identify with and perhaps
feel safe and understood by a porn star. Again, it's kind of a sad, lonely revelation. We have
Connie looking around for someone or something to understand him, someone to bond and connect with,
and the only thing he could seem to find is a porn star on a computer screen and a fantasy that's
taking place in his head. After a repetition of the song's hook,
Hell of a Life breaks down into angelic choir-like voices,
over which Connie performs a brief but revealing outro.
Kanye says,
I think I fell in love with the porn star and got married in the bathroom,
honeymoon on the dance floor,
and got divorced by the end of the night.
That's one hell of a life.
Kanye and his imagined wife have sex in the bathroom at a club,
have a dance,
and then leave each other hours later.
This mini-narrative is a reality.
revealing look into the extent of Kanye's fantasy.
Throughout the song, he claims to fall in love and imagines that he'll one day marry a porn star.
It seems now that love and marriage to Kanye was simply a metaphor for sex and nothing more.
He caps off the outro saying,
That's one hell of a life.
And we're again forced to decide on what he means by this.
Is it a life of excitement, a life of sin, or a life of misery?
Perhaps it's most accurately all three simultaneously,
none of which are fulfilling or sustainable. A hell of a life indeed.
And before we dissect the song's cryptic instrumental outro, there's just one thing I have to point out.
It's not something I'm 100% sure about, but it's interesting nonetheless.
Throughout the song, Kanye says hell of a life to end each hook and the outro we just heard.
Having listened to this song countless times in preparation of this podcast, I couldn't help
but realize that Connie never actually pronounces the word life fully.
never actually accents the f in life.
We fill it in ourselves because hell of a life is a common phrase we've all heard before.
But what happens when you leave the f out of life?
What's that leave us with?
It sounds to me a lot like hell of a lie.
Have a listen.
So what'd you think?
Did you hear it?
Again, it might be an overanalysis, but if it were in fact done on purpose, hell of a lie would
certainly be on point thematically.
Of course it accentuates the fantasy aspect of the song, which is a very much,
itself is one big lie taking place in Kanye's head.
But Hell of a Lie could also be Commentara in Kanye's confident claim that all he needs in life
is pussy and religion, a claim that already seems somewhat suspect.
We know a life full of sin isn't sustainable in any healthy way, and we know Connie knows that
too.
Anyway, I'll let you decide on the validity of this Hell of a Lie interpretation.
If anything, it's something like an interesting Freudian slip.
Hell of a Life concludes with the cryptic instrumental outro that features
The moans of Tiana Taylor, who sung the intro and chorus on the album Opener Dark Fantasy.
Soon after Taylor enters, Connie is heard breathing heavily.
Let's have a listen.
On the surface, it would seem Hell of a Life's outro as a depiction of a man and woman having sex.
It's the literal climax of a song about sexual expression, the oral manifestation of Connie's erotic imaginings.
But let's think about this section a little bit harder, no pun intended.
Hell of a Life opens with the lines, I think I just fell in love with the point.
porn star, turn the camera on she's a born star. In verse 2, Kanye says, you can hear the loudest
screams coming from inside the screen. Later, he asks, tell me what I got to do to be that guy,
talking about the male porn star having sex with the woman on the screen. It would certainly seem
Kanye is watching a porno throughout hell of a life, and the many narratives he creates are his
imagination running wild while watching said porno. And given the fantastical nature of the song,
wouldn't it seem more likely that the moans and heavy breathing,
are actually a depiction of Connie masturbating?
Let's listen again to the passage in question,
and this time,
notice the effect placed on the woman's voice,
the passionless nature of Connie's breathing,
and the accelerated pace of his breathing
when Connie is isolated at the very end of the track.
So, what did you think?
To me, the effect on the woman's voice
is reminiscent of the kind of audio you hear on a laptop,
heavy in treble and slightly devoid of bass.
Connie's breathing is EQ'd much differently,
and to me sounds out of sync with the voice.
woman's moans, like the two are operating independently of one another. Connie's breasts are
passionless, while the woman's moans are somewhat robotic. And because those moans also double as a melody,
we could technically call them scripted, perhaps like someone playing a part. Finally, the outro ends with
the music and woman cutting out altogether, leaving Connie isolated and alone, and his breasts grow
faster as if he's climaxing. For me, isolating Connie and his breasts at the end is a calculated tell
that he's indeed masturbating, presumably while alone in front of a computer or TV screen.
Of course, it's a sad and lonely image. Despite the exciting and adventurous musical mood throughout
the entire song, it ultimately deflates, ending in isolation, and loneliness. It forces us to
reconsider everything we just heard. Could it be hell of a life all takes place in Connie's head
while watching a porno and masturbating? The dark, twisted fantasies of a lonely rock star attempting
to climax? Moreover,
Is this a sad, inevitable conclusion of a man who on runaway,
commanded that his love interests leave him due to his inability to love and be intimate with a woman?
Is Connie destined to a life of empty sexual transactions,
forever paralyzed by lust, insecurity, and selfishness?
Again, a hell of a life indeed.
Conclusions
Hell of a life is a deeply complex narrative fantasy
that operates on multiple levels simultaneously.
On its surface, it's a crude display of the twisted imagining
of Kanye's psyche and a liberating release of his innermost fantasies.
Connie uses a porn star as a symbol of sexual freedom and self-expression in a song that
strives to unabashedly parade the darkest most sinful parts of himself, parts that are perhaps
inside all of us, though most of us could never or would never admit it, let alone publicly.
In this way, hell of a life is strangely progressed towards self-acceptance that Connie
struggle with on Runaway.
On the other hand, the more Kanye becomes at home with his true self and all the dark complexities
of his psyche, the more alienated from the world he becomes. A porn star is then a symbol of
the outcast, the pariah, shunned from society for simply being who they are. In this way,
hell of a life is a tragic realization of Connie's place in the world, or shall we say displacement
in the world. What seemed to begin is a momentous push towards self-actualization after the cathartic
release of Runaway. Hell of a life ultimately deflates by the song's end. We find Connie all alone,
pleasuring himself in front of a screen, his fantastical concepts of love and marriage reduced
to momentary less-ridden sexual pleasures. The somberness of this realization is accentuated
and carried over in the album's next track, which by no coincidence begins with a continuation
of the breathing we heard on Hell of a Life's outro.
The breathing here now sounds like a sigh, like resignation. Of course, the song is
blame game, a sorrow-filled recount of a relationship gone sour, which will be a
thoroughly explore next time on Dissect. Dissect is written and produced by me.
Theme music by Birocratic. If you're hungry for more Connie West analysis, I might suggest
checking out the podcast, Watching the Throne. Host Chris and Travis dive deep on Connie lyrics one
track at a time, and it's on Watching the Throne that I first heard the hell of a life
masturbation theory I shared on today's episode. You can find their pod on all major
podcast apps. Just search Watching the Throne. If you'd like to support
Dissect, you can do so at patreon.com slash dissect. As you've heard me say many times,
there's no team behind Dissect. It's just me. And by donating as little as $1 per month,
you can help me offset some of the costs of the show. This week's Patreon Diamond Level
shoutouts go to Zahir McGee, Dan Evans, Sam and Chaudry, Grant Jakins, R. Hudson, Stuart Cornelius,
Kevin Wynn, Austin Frazier, David Drummond, and Theo Mills. Again, you can support Dissect at
Patreon spelled p-a-t-r-e-o-n.com slash dissect.
Also, there's just a little over a week to pre-order your dissect season 2 apparel.
Head over to rocky clarkclothing.com to check out the twisted fantasy-inspired long-sleeveeat
with all proceeds going to charity.
Again, that's rocky-clarkclothing.com.
Okay, thanks everyone.
I'll talk to you next week.
