EverydaySpy Podcast - CIA Spy: "This Is A Woman's Sexual Fantasy" - And Nice Guys Don't Get It...

Episode Date: July 7, 2026

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Human beings love sex. Men love sex, but women love sex too. And it's really important that you understand that if you are a nice guy, you're going to get women all wrong. So let me break down the psychological factors and the physiological factors that will help you get the woman you want or help you get more sex with the woman you have. Either way, today we're talking about the CIA secrets to make sex happen for you. Now, look, sex is a, a topic that has countless books, blogs, videos made about it all the time because sex, especially in the United States, is a mystery. Part of the time we feel guilty for wanting it.

The other part of the time, we feel like we can't get enough of it. And then for some people in between, they just want to be left alone and they want to stop having everybody ask them for sex, guilt them about sex, or make them feel confused and awkward about sex. There's a reason that sex is so different and complicated for everybody. It's because sex is tied to your background experiences. It's tied to your here and now emotional well-being. And it's tied to your future ideas about yourself. Now, that's why sex is such a big and complicated topic. But we're not here to cover the big complicated topic of sex today. We're here to talk about some simple recipes that men specifically can use to win the women of their dreams or to make sure that the woman you have right now understands that you are still her dream. bow. So for men to understand how best to win a woman's heart in bed specifically, you need to understand that women break into five psychological archetypes for what they're interested in in a man.

Right away, the idea that all women break into these five subgroups should tell you that not all women are the same. Even worse, women from archetype to archetype will actually shift and change throughout their lifespan because the way that a woman views sex is so different than the way that most typical men view sex. Now, let's break into the difference between men and women and some of those archetypes now. The most important thing to understand when you're trying to get into the mind of a female

and her sexual fantasies, her sexual preferences, her sexual desires, is first to understand that for women specifically, sex breaks into three very different factors, a psychological factor, a physiological factor, and then a cognitive factor. The psychological factor means how they view and think of themselves and sex. The physiological factor being their actual body and how their body responds to sexual stimuli.

And then third, the cognitive process, meaning the actual logical, rational process to sex. Now, this is such an important distinction between women and men, because men, we have a physiological factor, and that's pretty much it. The cognitive and psychological factors of our sex don't even kick in until after the physiological act of arousal happens. That's why we make stupid decisions after we have an erection, where women will oftentimes not even be sexually aroused when they are taking part in sexual activities. That's a big part of what causes so much conflict between us and so much confusion for men when they're trying to understand women. So for today's conversation, just keep in mind, women are three parts equally, and those three

parts are interchangeable, not only from woman to woman, but also in a single woman throughout the different stages of her life. So understanding that women are comprised of these three kind of shifting shells in a shell game of sex, let's start getting into the five archetypes that help you understand the sexual fantasies behind the woman you're trying to win. Now the first archetype is what CIA would call the powerful billionaire. Now keep in mind, we're calling this archetype the powerful billionaire, not because women actually care about the billions, it's because women care about the power. The power part of the power billionaire archetype is the important part. The billionaire part really just helps to give you context in the idea of

understanding the type of power in this particular archetype as compared to the power relevant in the other four archetypes that we're going to talk about today. For this particular archetype, I want you to think back on the book 50 Shades of Gray and the worldwide phenomenon that that book caused because the main character in that book, Christian Gray, was the representation of the powerful billionaire sexual fantasy archetype for women. Now here's what goes into that archetype. First, the man is financially powerful. Why is that important?

That's important because for a man who has all the money in the world, what could he possibly want in any woman? So when the cognitive part, remember cognitive is part of the three pillars that make up a woman's sexuality, when the cognitive rational part of a woman looks at a powerful billionaire, the logical conclusion that she has is, this man must not want anything, he must not need anything. So cognitively, rationally, logically,

women are already anchored in the idea that this person must not need anything. They must not want anything. And even more impressive, however they collected their billions, must show how intelligent and refined and sophisticated this particular man is. Part and parcel to this powerful billionaire Christian Gray type sexual fantasy is the fact that this powerful man

is also very dominant, very, assertive very decisive women who like this archetype are very much attracted to the idea of a powerful man who's intelligent who also knows exactly what to do and when to do it it takes all the pressure all the anxiety all the self-doubt off the woman because she can literally just follow suit with this intelligent powerful dominant man anywhere he wants to go for women who have the right mix of physiological psychological and cognitive makeup when they have that particular recipe where they like the physically dominant, powerful, wealthy man, this archetype is incredibly powerful.

But it's not just because the person is decisive and the person is powerful and wealthy. It's also because behind this veil of power and confidence lies a mysterious man with emotional vulnerability. And that is what makes the powerful billionaire human to women who appeal to this sexual fantasy. It's because the hard shell that the world sees is not the true man. In fact, there's just one missing scale, kind of like smog, if you've ever read The Hobbit. This one point of vulnerability, and only one person in the whole universe can access that powerful billionaire's vulnerability, and that is the female heroine in the story. Now we're getting into the psychological factors in that three-part recipe that make up sexual fantasies for all women.

For that powerful billionaire fantasy, women appeal to the psychological element of an emotionally vulnerable man who needs a woman to come in and be his support. A woman like them to come in and save the day. That idea is so arousing psychologically that physiologically a woman melts to that fantasy. So maybe your woman is a woman who appreciates the powerful billionaire archetype. If she's read 50 shades of gray, if you find that she's very interested in, the idea of dominance and submission, if you find that she is very attracted to people who are decisive,

people of power, people of prestige, that's a good sign that your lady is going to appeal to you if you play the role of the powerful billionaire. The second main archetype in a woman's sexual fantasy is the idea of a figure that's known as high authority. This character is often sometimes described as the alpha male, but for our conversation, I want to make sure you understand that what we're talking about is someone of high authority,

someone who is a powerful person in their skill set, in their knowledge base, in their sphere of influence. That's what makes someone high authority. And I say that because it is the virtue of high authority that makes this sexual fantasy so powerful in women. That could mean a doctor. That could mean a warrior. That could mean a gourmet chef. It's really independent of the wealth or prestige that the person has worldwide, which makes them very different than the powerful billionaire we just talked about. this is a person of high authority in their specific niche. And when a woman is attracted or

interested to that niche, you can see why the person of high authority becomes so intriguing and appealing to that woman. We are already getting into the three-part recipe by understanding a woman's cognitive, rational interest in something that leads to her psychological attraction to people who are of a high authority status in that skill set. Now the magic behind a woman's high authority fantasy isn't necessarily in finding somebody who's very talented in a skill, but in winning that person's admiration and respect. Because, remember, for a woman to be attracted to the person at all, that person must already be a master with high authority. They're already some general. They're already a senior ranking officer. They're already a gourmet

chef. They're already somebody who's won accolades and prizes in whatever skill set they have. So the woman is not competing against the person of high authority. Instead, she's trying to win that person's respect and appreciation for something altogether different or parallel to that person's expertise. This is why you see so many blogs and erotica novels and romance novels that are based around the idea of a boss and his secretary, or some general and a civilian, or some doctor and their patient, because you have somebody of high authority who dedicates themselves to a subordinate, somebody who is below them in terms of skill or hierarchy, and that difference is completely ignored because the power of attraction, appeal, seduction is so powerful that it

overcomes all other obstacles. When you're thinking about the three-part recipe for a woman's sexual fantasies, you have to remember the cognitive piece. And it simply doesn't make logical sense for somebody of high authority to align themselves, to subject themselves to somebody who is a subordinate in their chain of command or hierarchy or pecking order. CIA believes that all people are born with a spy secret superpower. For some people, that means they can win deals for others. They can spot liars. Some can even seduce lovers.

I built a free three-minute test to help reveal to you exactly what your secret hidden superpower is. All you have to do is click on the link in the description below. Take the test and start using your spy superpower to stay ahead of 99% of people. And that is exactly what catches a woman's interest. hooks her to make her psychologically attracted to the idea and then ultimately physiologically reactive to the fantasy of high authority. The third big archetype is one that you've seen a thousand times and maybe never identified before. We call this the archetype of the beast that is tamed. The beast that is

tamed is the idea that the man is some sort of wild powerful creature, maybe even a supernatural creature. And this powerful creature is driven by primal desire and And the primal desire maybe led that person to be super powerful, super wealthy, or almost indestructible. But at the center of this primal desire and raw masculine energy, there is an attraction, a curiosity, a submissiveness to be tamed by a single female, which is where you get the idea of the beast who is tamed. This incredibly powerful, possibly supernatural creature that will subject themselves to the authority of one female. one lion tamer, if you will. This is your Edward Cullen character from the Twilight series. This is your beast in Beauty in the Beast.

This is your vampire in interview with a vampire. This is the powerful creature that's completely unstoppable, except that the love and affection and attention of one single female makes them break. To a woman, that idea is so incredibly psychologically riveting that her body can't help but react in a sexual way. if your woman is attracted to this idea of a beast who is tamed. This is one of the easiest women for you to spot, because if you have a woman that already shows interest in these supernatural or incredibly powerful beasts,

women who are into werewolves and women who are into mummies and women who are into vampires and women who are into this idea of supernatural creatures having immense power, that woman is already showing you her natural logical appeal towards this incredibly powerful creature. If you have a woman who's into WWE or WWF, if you have a woman who likes ultimate fighting, if you have a woman who likes the idea of constant competition and challenge and she's a fan of the Olympics and she's a fan of super athletes, that is a woman who appreciates power, power at a primal level. And that woman is already showing you that she has a sexual desire, a sexual attraction,

that will lend itself to the idea of a man who can be tamed through all of a human. that power with a foundation of love and adoration. This archetype is powerful and it's common and you'll see it recur multiple times throughout the lifespan of a woman. You might first see it in a woman who's younger when she's first coming into her own. You'll see it again in a woman as she finds her way into her mid-career and you'll find it again in women as they approach mid-life because the idea of a primal, powerful character is attractive to women at multiple times throughout their life. because that primal instinct is always at play in the woman herself. It's different than the powerful billionaire.

It's different than the person of high authority because both of those individuals usually only happen later in life. It takes time to build skill. It takes time to build wealth. Because primal power is something that's always present in a man from the moment he reaches his sexual peak. The fourth major archetype is one that you've seen in movies a million times over and it's the archetype of the protector.

Women are naturally attracted to the idea of a protector because they grew up in a household where they had two protectors, a mother and a father, perhaps even more if they had older siblings. So naturally, their cognitive and psychological preferences, two of the three parts that go into a woman's sexual energy is already predisposed to favoring people who are protectors, people who are heroes, people who sacrifice or put themselves into harm or dangerous way for the sake of that woman. And when you understand the sexual appeal behind the protective preferences in your woman, you will quickly find that her physiological body responds to her psychological attraction to that sexual fantasy. This is where you find all the sexual tension behind the idea of a bodyguard, or a soldier who's protecting a subject, or a secret agent who's protecting a single female against all these dangers that surround her. This romantic concept stems from the psychological experience of a woman growing up. up somewhere, somehow, where she was protected by some other person. Again, it's irrelevant

whether their protector is male or female because psychologically what they connect with is that protection, that security, that comfort, that reliability. Those psychological and cognitive levers lead to the physiological interest in sex, the physiological turn-on, the physiological desire to engage sexually in the energy that was rooted cognitively and psychologically first. The women who are most susceptible to this particular archetype are women who already feel like they are in a vulnerable place. Maybe they're between jobs. Maybe they have self-doubt about themselves. Maybe their body is changing or their age is changing. They're dealing with children who are leaving the house. Maybe they're even dealing with children who are just being born and starting out

life with them. These are women who have a high level of self-doubt. These are women who are looking for someone to come in and align themselves in a way that protects not only the woman, but the responsibilities that that woman has. In essence, the protector is not just there to protect you, but it's there to protect your reputation and protect your future chances of success in whatever you're trying to accomplish personally, professionally, or even in a family. From that foundation of protection, from that confidence that comes from the other person, a sexual and emotional connection follows through. And that sexual, emotional connection is what drives a sexual fantasy behind the protector. It is that emotional

connection. It is that sexual and emotional connection that makes the protector such a powerful fantasy in ways that the other three archetypes simply don't meet muster. The fifth archetype is the rarest archetype to find in a woman, but it is also the one archetype that is so obvious when nice guys see it play out in a bad guy's successful relationship. And that archetype is known as the mysterious man or the emotionally distant man. In both cases, it is the mystery behind the man that naturally appeals to the woman, but it's a rare archetype because not all women want a man who is mysterious. Remember that women's sexual attraction is based on three parts, a psychological element, a physiological element, and a cognitive element. Cognitively, women already know that

mystery means danger, that the unknown means uncertainty. And that goes against, the core principles of what most women want because women want predictability. They want security, they want confidence. However, there are different phases in a woman's life cycle where mystery becomes something that is attractive and is appealing. That's why you see so many young women in relationships with bad boys. But when you start to watch women get more mature and successful, all of a sudden they're much less interested in rebellious men. They're looking for a man that's stable, intelligent, and resourceful. They're not looking for a man who's obstinate and ostentatious and braggadocious like they are when they're younger.

The reason that mysterious, emotionally distant men attract women at all is because it poses a challenge, a cognitive challenge for many, many women, because they want to understand why that person is so distant. They want to win him over. They want to prove that they're smart enough and capable enough to unlock that person's interest. When you see men who are aloof and you see women chase those men who are aloof, it's because that woman is trying to fix his aloofness. She's trying to crack the code. She's trying to unlock the secrets. She's trying to get under his skin.

She may not even necessarily be attracted to him physically. She may not even be attracted to him emotionally. But he poses a challenge that many other men simply don't pose. All men will agree that for the most part, men are pretty easy to understand. Men are pretty simple creatures. So it's in these rare, aloof, distant, emotionally blocked men that the challenge exists. And for women who are challenge-oriented, they're like a dog on a bone and they won't let go. And that's where this mysterious man archetype gains its power.

Now, if you're like me, you remember the book Pride and Prejudice from high school, but you also remember never reading it because you went straight to the cliff notes, right? But Pride and Prejudice has a character called Mr. Darcy. Mr. Darcy was a character that was documented in a book that was published in 1813. Because even then, the author Jane Austen, understood the appeal and sexual desire behind the aloof character that she created in Mr. Darcy. So make no mistake that the archetype of the emotionally distant, aloof, mysterious man is a powerful one for women, but don't make the assumption that if you want to win a woman in bed,

you must be that emotionally distant person, especially if that's not the way you're naturally wired. There are still four other archetypes that are much more common and much more powerful than the aloof man. So now that you understand these five sexual archetypes for women, the powerful billionaire, the high status authority figure, the beast who is tamed, the protector, and the mysterious emotionally distant man,

you're that much closer to understanding how to crack the code on the sexual fantasies for any woman you're trying to woo. Now the last point here is very important. you understand that all women's sexual fantasies are built on three equal pillars, psychological, physiological, and cognitive elements. But in addition to that, you have to understand that all women are a bit of a magic potion. They're different amounts of each of the three of those elements that go into making their particular recipe.

Now, I understand how discouraging it can sound to understand that every woman is a different concoction, and you have to essentially recreate the recipe for every woman you want to seduce. But in addition to that, you also have to understand that women, don't know their own recipe. When it comes to human intelligence operations, CIA teaches us about a concept called concordance. Concordance means the order of operations in which you hack a person's cognitive functions. In many ways, concordance is obvious.

To give you a simple example for concordance, just think about being low energy, seeing a picture of fast food, and then feeling hungry, right? That actual growling in your stomach, the physiological effect of hunger, didn't come out of nowhere, it actually came as a concordant series of events preceding it. When it comes to sexual desire for most men, it's the same way. We might see something sexually appealing, which then makes our hormones kick in. If you want a $3,000 a month payday for life, what would you feel free to do? Maybe take a long weekend, every weekend, or try a bunch of new hobbies.

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It's the opposite of a wild animal, where wild animals smell pheromones, and then that turns them into a concordance series of steps that result in them mating. When you think about food and you think about male sex drive, they are completely the opposite of women's concordance, because concordance among women is different from woman to woman. And many women don't even understand the concordance steps in their own arousal process. For some women, visual stimulus does come first. And from that visual stimulus, you'll feel.

find that they become physiologically stimulated and then they want to participate in a sexual act. This is your women who like to watch porn. This is your women who like sexy pictures. The visual stimulus leads to a concordant process that brings them arousal. That's a very simple example for most men to understand because it's similar to the male's concordant process. But think about women who have to read something interesting or women who have to feel some sort of sensation first, whether that's a massage or oil on the back, or even a woman who's out on the beach or a woman who's coming in from the cold. Sometimes the first step for women is sensory. And that sensory feeling like extreme cold or extreme heat makes no logical sense with being tied to any kind of sexual

arousal, but for that particular woman, it might lead in concordance to that point. So if your woman is a woman who wants to be close to you and physically touch you when she's extremely cold, that's what you might be dealing with. Or if you have a woman who wants to spend time on the beach, and even though she's hot and sweaty and you're hot and sweaty and she wants to lay next to you, that may be a sign that your woman is a sensory concordant person. Another tell that might help you understand the woman that you're with, especially if the woman that you're with is your wife, or possibly a second wife or a second relationship later in life.

Older women, especially women who are academically or professionally successful, oftentimes need some kind of mental stimulus from the form of a story or a narrative in order to trigger the concordive process that leads to their physical, physiological sexual arousal. What does that mean? That means many of these women need to read something. They need to be part of a story. They need to watch something that is romantic or something that is suggestive or something that is erotic in order for their body to then follow suit with the same physiological response. So you can see that there's all sorts of elements that play into the concordant steps for a woman to go from cold to hot and bothered. But you have to understand your particular woman. You have to know how to take her through that process. And understanding the five archetypes is going to help you get there faster. Because wherever her archetype lies, that's where you want to set the first stimulus up. If she's looking for a beast who is tamed, you're going to catch her cognitive interest by being the beast that needs tamed. If she's looking for the powerful billionaire, the person who is decisive and confident,

then she's going to cognitively be interested in you when you demonstrate that up front. You don't want to try and save the five archetypes for the final step. You want to live the five archetypes as the first step to catch her psychological and cognitive hooks that will lead ultimately to her arousal. I hope you've learned something in this deep dive into the five sexual fantasy archetypes for women. Make sure you like, comment, hit subscribe, or click on the link below if you want to learn more about how to bring spy skills into your everyday life so you can win at work, at home, in the boardroom, and in the bedroom.