F*ck Buddies: A Sex and Dating Advice Podcast - Episode 380 - Reversible Undies

Episode Date: February 2, 2026

Everyone knows that underwear resets in freshness every day if it's worn inside out.  Topics include the sleepiness men must fight, swinging in a situationship, keeping the drawers fresh, ejaculate volume.

Hello friends. My name is Dane Miller. My name is Nile Spain. We're your fuck buddies. We're a sex and dating advice podcast where we take your sticky, sexy situations. And we turn them into sexy, sticky situations. Whoa, man, that's... Are you doing that? Nile's cameras freaking the hell out. You'll notice that there's no... It's just zooming in and out over and over again on them. The fuck? Yeah, there was no... I wasn't doing anything. Does my hand? My face look like a hand? Yeah. Shape of an L on his...

forehead. Well, the years don't go and then they don't... No? This is, I love that we are so enamored by this bit. Yeah, I feel like we should just restart the episode at this point. I don't think so. Okay, well, simply put, we find questions. We find questions either

online and from our incredible listeners such as yourselves, and we answer them right here, right now on the topics of sex and dating. And this week, we're going to talk about, girlfriend wants me to help her finish every time, but I'm powerless after I finish. Swinging, in a situation ship.

Changing your underwear. Is this normal? Low ejaculate volume. We should also talk about heated rivalry. We're sex and dating advice podcast. We haven't talked about the biggest sex phenomenon

that swept the world and it's Canadian. And I haven't seen it. Well, you should. It's great. Yeah. I know, look, I know it's probably incredible,

but there's just, I just have zero interest. Yeah, it's a romance show. So you watch romance shows. If it's, if it's not a rom-com, Like, I don't watch romance shows, really. You've seen them, though.

It's like, it's rom-commy. It's not like, you know, it's good. It's just like, I don't care about hockey. I don't care about sports. Hey, let me tell you. If you don't care about hockey, you're in a good position because there is little to know hockey other than the fact that it exists. Yeah, I mean, it just seems like those books that I, like, and I know it is a book.

There is books. I just, like, I don't know, man. Like, it's the same thing. Like, I remember. what's that other the one that's based on the fan fiction with Anne Hathaway. It's like Harry Styles. I don't know. There's a fan fiction. Do you watch that? Yes, and I hated it. Why would you watch the trash one and not watch the good one? What's wrong with you?

Because I don't know. Let's be fair. No one came out about that movie and was like, this is fire. Yeah. No, I know. I wonder though, here's a positing. And I don't know. I'm sure this is a shitty line of Like, do you think if this was about two lesbian athletes and men got as horny about it, do you think it would be received in the same way as women going to hockey arena is calling the boy aquariums? Is that a thing? Yeah. Yeah, it is, it is very interesting because, like, obviously women are sexualized on screen in such a different way than men. So, like, if it were a lesbian thing and it had happened and it did provoke this reaction, it would be kind of.

more of the same as opposed to this, which, yes, if you equate them one for one, it's weird, but I guess they're celebrating a lot of, like, things that aren't often done. But at the same time, just because things aren't often done, doesn't mean you could just go to hockey arena. This is called a boy aquariums. No, if it's, but it's the same as like, you know, one direction and women being like feral over them when they were like super young. And it's like, if you flip genders, it's real fucked up. Yeah. And this is like, I mean, we're getting a little off topic here. But, um, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, often like sort of come to Justin Bieber's defense where people like gave him a bad rep.

But I was like imagine being a fucking what like 12 year old or 11 year old when he was fucking discovered and grown women treated you like you were the second coming of sex icon. Like that would fuck you up. Right. Like there's no way this wouldn't fuck you up. So it's like of course he went fucking crazy. It's the same way that like all the teen stars like did. Yeah.

I think just being famous in general is bad for your life. And the younger it happens to you, the worse you are dealing with it. I get it. Yeah. It's the same way it's like we all look back now and like when Britney Spears went quote unquote crazy and shaved her head and did all their crazy shit. It's like we now know why she did that. Fame and all that shit was doing terrible things to her. She was being abused by, you know, a number of people who are like in authority positions over her.

So I'm like, why it's weird that we haven't figured this out, especially in. celebrity culture of being like, if young person become famous and all attention is on them, the odds are stacked against them. Right? Like, not have normal life, not be normal. It's like, yes. Yeah. Yes.

Well, he just like, was it Brennan Lee Mulligan said a thing in like an interview where he was just like being like famous or whatever. It's just like being perceived all the time in like such a weird way. And he's like, it generally makes, like it breaks me down. Like my brain is going crazy. because there's comments and there's posts and there's people who see me and like you just can't be normal. There's like the foot is always on the gas and you're always being perceived and judged and like you're just never like chill. And he was like, that's coming from me who's like a low end of the

spectrum of fame versus a normal one. That's not me saying. I'm saying that's what he said. You know? I think, yeah, mess you up. All right. This is by imaginary seat 5575. My male 24 girlfriend, female 24 wants me to help her finish every time we have sex. But I'm basically powerless after I finish. So I've been with my girlfriend for about seven months now, the love life is at a dead end right now. Of course, there are some other reasons that can be resolved, but this issue here is something I don't know how to solve. So since the beginning of the relationship, she's been asking me to help her finish with her vibrator after sex because she's unable to orgasm from penetration. Overall, not just for me, or just needs vibration

because that's what she's used to. Problem is, after sex, I'm extremely relaxed. I'm mostly just want to cuddle and sleep, which I thought was pretty normal for men. The other, and probably bigger problem is when I'm with her. There's no chill. She always has something to do that I'm some form of, and she is honestly pretty shit at time and task management. This means we usually go to bed far too late. I have to wake up at 6 a.m. Totally tired and exhausted when getting into bed. And sure, I love having sex with her, but that makes me even more exhausted. Always ends with me basically falling asleep between her legs holding the vibrator. Have I talked to her about it? Nope. In seven months, I've never talked about this because yeah, it's fair that she finishes. If I do,

so can she talk about the time and sleeping problem, though, and this seems to be the underliebler. issue that she doesn't see as a big problem, probably won't do too much to fix. I do have to note she did say that if I don't want to, I don't have to help her. I have not yet brought myself to say no and was always trying to be positive and caring. Follick, it would be unfair to say no. Also talk to a friend about it as more experience with me, 10 plus girls, and he was a bit confused because he's never had a girl asked to finish every single time. I've only had two sexual partners slash relationships, and this was never an issue in my first

relationship that she was able to orgasm through penetration or in the other cases didn't ask me to help her. yeah I've been avoiding sex with her here and there because I wasn't horny or something but rather being so tired I can't handle it in the end does anyone have advice on how to handle this or even talk about it okay there's there's glimmers of hope here that like are there well I mean like look him being like I understand you know she should be able to finish that you know what I mean great the fact that he also seems to be like but also is it weird that she wants to other girls don't demand this and that's glimmers of red flags to me. Yes, yes. Look, I'm saying that there is, there's enough rope that we might be able to pull this man onto, onto the right side of the fence here. I think what this does boil down to is you, you can have sex not only at night right before bed, right? Like that is, again, unless your schedule doesn't allow it. Like, I don't know what these people do. So like, you know,

she always has something going on that involves him and she's shit at task management. What are you talking about. I kind of understand what he's talking about in the sense of like, presumably he works a early, if he's getting up at 8 or 6. 6. Let's assume maybe like a 9 to 5 or a slightly earlier gig. Maybe he's going to the gym before and 8 to 4. Whatever.

If she is like work from home or whatever, but then like decides that, you know, oh it's, you know, I'm not going to worry about the laundry or whatever. And then like right before bed, she's like oh shit, I didn't do laundry. And And then so like now they're waiting up to do it. Like, I understand that.

But if that's the case, if those are the things you're doing, have sex while you wait for the laundry or... That's exactly what I was going to say. Right? Like, there's... It's just such a simple question to answer in my mind. Like, hey, you always want to have sex super late. I'm getting up at 6 a.m. No.

Let's do it another time. Oh, we don't have any other time. Okay, well, let's work on X, Y, or Z. Like, if you're in the middle of something, she's like, hey, we got to, we got to do this puzzle, you could be like, yeah, okay, we can do this puzzle you forgot about that you want to do at 11 p.m. That's going to take us a couple hours. Or we could fuck. Like, but I'm not going to have sex in three hours when I got to go to bed. You know, like, these are all things you can just say. And you don't have to have sex if you're tired. Yeah, there's you, I mean, you do very clearly say that

you've never talked to her about this. But, well, he said he talked about this part. He didn't talk about the her finishing part. Right. Okay. Yeah. So, I mean, this is the part that needs to be fixed. Because he does say also like, oh, I don't think she's going to try to change right. Right? Like, how did this chat go? Hey, I don't want to only have sex super late after we've done all these things. No. Okay. Okay. All right then. Like, if that's the case, maybe this partner isn't for you. Like, if you're raising legitimate concerns and she's just like, no, I will not try to make our sex lives better. I'll not try to make your life better. That's not great. Yeah. Also, like, how late are we talking? I mean, I guess it doesn't really matter. If you're not getting

enough sleep, you're not getting enough sleep. Yeah. I feel like whenever we have questions about sleep and rest, you and I... We are the wrong people to ask. It's like, wait, you got three hours? Great. You know? Like, we, we don't really parse what that means to be, like, rested and, like, wake up in a good state of, of sleepiness. Yeah. So I feel like there is just an inherent issue for us answering questions about... Probably the worst questions we could be asked. Like, we're pretty good a lot of stuff. Just general, general sleep and being rested.

What is that? We actually, years ago, we met a demon while we were traveling Europe together and he was like, look, you could be really good of podcasting, or you can sleep and we chose,

we chose the wrong one. Once again, we made the wrong choice. It chose podcasting. Yeah, who knew? I was like, Dane, it's going to be big.

We're going to be millionaires. But like, let's look at the other side of things where it's like, oh, she doesn't come for patch of sex. I come. and then I'm like, I'm too sleepy. Like, okay, there's some really, really easy fixes to this.

One, make her come before you do. Yes. That, two, make her come while you do. Like, penetration doesn't have to be just penetration. Use your vibrator or use her vibrator on her while you fuck her. Use your hands on her while you fuck her. Go down on her before you fuck her. And be even lazier.

Let her use her vibrator on her while she, you're fucking here, right? Like, if you want to keep all hands for a different, different erogenous zones if you want to play nipples, breasts, choking, hair pulling, whatever, right? If you're in doggy, it's very easy for her to, you know, reach back. And so, like, you could even remove yourself from this equation if this is the case. That's the thing. Maybe you suck at time management. You could be doing these things at the same time. Instead, you're separating them into different tasks. I will say, this is, this is a peek behind the curtain. I used to hook up with someone who required the same sort of situation where, like, afterwards, but like she would whip out the large like a full wand vibrator and like there's no way to like as a other person using it to like do so comfortably so you kind of have to like get up and like mount and like it's essentially like just jackhammering and it's like I understand the it was never my favorite like I was always happy to do it because she did a damn fine job getting me there I might as well but it was a very weird like disassociative sort of episode where I was just like I was in sort

of like bliss but I was also just like and it was just so weird because like she was like she's like I need to really focus and I was like great so it's like I'm not talking like we weren't interacting so I was just essentially like holding the vibrator like this giant fucking wand in place while she went into like her come zone and it is a strange that sounds all Yeah, like it is, it is a strange, like, thing to, to be a part of. So I understand, like, if that's what's required of you, I do understand the like, ugh. And, like, especially if, like, you're really tired and it's really late.

Yeah. I would get, like, the lack of enthusiasm to be like, okay, I guess I hold this now until you're done. Hmm. Well, I feel like at that point, you just have to try to work out other ways that you can do it. Because, again, it's more fun when you're both in it together. than just being like, I'm done and I'm sleepy and now it's your turn, like, be it them holding it or you doing whatever, like, in the middle of it. But like, see, I'm kind of riled up on this question

because during the week, I ended up in a Reddit conversation with someone who there was like a similar question where it was like, oh, when I finish, like, I don't want to return the favor to my partner and they're getting upset. And all these guys being like, well, that's just how men are. When you finish, you're done. And like, women are idiots for not knowing that. And it's like, you don't, and I'm like, no. One, if you literally physically cannot make your partner finish once you have, make them finish first, right? And two, I don't think there's ever been a time I've been so come sleepy that I can't get

my partner off afterwards if needs be because I'm not a piece of shit. I'm not like, oh, I'm a little tired, so we like, fuck off. Like, it's insane. So make your partner come. If you somehow aren't able to after the fact, do it before the fact. It's that easy. But the amount of men in this three. I'd be like, no, they're in the right.

No, what are you doing? It is funny that, like, that is meant to be like, we're just men being men. Once we come, we tired. It's like, that is the lamest excuse. It's like the most, like, because like flip that onto any other, like, macho thing, right? Like, oh, after work, I don't go to the gym

because I'm sleepy. Yeah. Oh, I fucking got my pump on. And then my friends and family wanted to spend time of me, but I was like, no, man. I'm like a bro. I'm sleepy. Right?

Like all the, like everything about like macho culture and like I don't know why I'm depending this because it is something I want to dismanting we're not pushing macho culture but But it's like hustle grind push through you're tough

You can go you can do it do it do it do it Like one after another grind grind grind But it's like the second Women's pleasure comes into it Too tired man Too sleepy and comfy bro That's it Where's hustle?

right? You could be fingering her right now. Yeah. You got two hands. Why aren't you fingering two people right now? Exactly. And you got a tongue. That's three people, one bad. Who knows how dexterous them toes? Yeah. Five people, one man. Just the pleasure starfish. Have you ever put a toe inside someone? I have. Yeah. I did too. Sucks. Was it specifically because you thought it would be really funny and you were both like, this is real weird and then you did it because that was my one. Yeah. Yeah. Specifically, I was a joke about it. Yeah.

And then we were just like, should we? And it was bad. And just like immediately both of us like, eh. Yeah, it was awful. And you know what? That's probably someone's cake. So I'm sorry. But no, it was one of those things.

We tick the box and I'm out. Yeah, we were just yucking our particular yuck. Yeah, it's yeah. Yeah. Everyone should do it once though. I would love to know. Tell us, have you done it? Yeah.

You don't even have to say what it is. We're not going to like, you know, we don't don't want that proof on record just email us saying yes we i have yeah um i wonder i imagine a a flexible young woman or bennie woman could probably get her own toe inside of her i could probably put a toe inside of me no i don't know if i can get my ankle that way i think you really have to try shattering it now's ankle's got a 360 maneuver now i get no scope you from anywhere man it's why you can swim so fast it's practically a propeller back there just yeah you just twists it around around like a One of those rubber toys.

It's the elastic band, yeah. And like, oh, yeah. That's why I'm banned from the Olympics. It's true. And I hit me. Yeah, that's a thing that I do. Was it this one? Yeah, this is from sealing,

swinging while in a situation ship. I had 36 year old, 36 year old female. Whoa, Freudian slip there, was recently pursued by a married man. Him and his wife are swingers. Apparently he's been checking me out for a while. At first I was sketched out,

but we have mutual friends and the conversation is great. So here we go. I'm definitely not a brood. I'm just never done anything like this before. He explained that his wife has two long-term partners and they have threesomes with one male and her, which was offered to me as well to swap with both men. There's a lot of rules. I'm into it. But what if I catch feelings for the married guy? I feel like I might. I also am in what I would call in best case a situation ship. Lots of feelings, but in the three months we've had sex once. No making out or feelings of desire from him at all. Maybe a peck once a day. It is making me nuts.

I crave sex. I was just in basically sexless relationship before. So I'm torn. Do I tell my partner I feel depraved? Do I hide it because we're in a relationship or we're not in a relationship? Hell. So many things here. One, you should probably talk to this person if you're unsatisfied sexually because like have you?

Is it just a thing that you're like, well, this is how it is? Or have you brought up with them? I assume not. No, it doesn't sound like they have. Do I tell my partner I feel depraved? I assume deprived. Deprived. Deprived.

I feel so fucking depraved. now. Yeah, I would definitely tell them that and just be like, hey, although it's funny because you can't really have that conversation and the other conversation at the same time. No. Because it's going to feel like you're saying, hey, I kind of feel deprived. Also, I'm going to go fuck this guy. It's going to feel a little more personal than, you know, but I do think you should have that conversation. If you like this person, you want things to continue because you're clearly not happy. But it's also like weird to me that you're like, I have feelings like this guy. He doesn't design. or want me at all gives me a peck and won't have sex with me.

How is it a situation? That's what I'm saying. It's like, what is the situation? Because I'm confused. Is it just the fact that he exists and he's there? And like, does he know he's in a situation ship?

Is the peck a like, oh no, here comes this woman. Yeah, like, is he just European and he's like, and you're like, yeah, baby.

Because like, there's a couple things here. One, you're barely in a relationship with this person. Or at least, sorry, you're barely in a sexual relationship with this person. I think you need to define what the hell you guys are in the not the what are we situation,

but like, are you guys hooking up? Because it doesn't seem like you are, right? So if you're not hooking up, what the hell are you doing? And you're not exclusive. Yeah. Like you're not in a relationship, it seems. Does he know that?

Like, I think you need to have like a very clear like boundaries being like, hey, I would like to keep seeing you. But like, I am interested in a sexual relationship. If you're not, then perhaps we move on because like I don't really want to just like,

occasionally have a kiss on the cheek and that's it. Because like you're also saying like you're not holding hands or like making out or like cuddling or anything either. Right. So it's like what are you doing? Yeah. That's not to say that like that's all that could be in a situation. No, but are you, it's clearly what you want. Like she clearly wants something and all she's getting is kiss on cheek as far as we know. So by all means like, and rather than clarifying, which we've always talked about before, like advocate for what you want. So if you literally are like, hey, I'm enjoying that this casual. I wish we could have more sex.

You know, bring that out and talk to them about it. And like, if they're like, wait, casual, we're not. Then you really got to have a chat before you go and huck up with this other guy. And if he's just like, yeah, casual is great. Let's have more sex. Then you'll know what's going on. Right. If he doesn't want to have more sex and that's not what you're into, maybe you have to call it.

But yeah. Communication is very much the key on this side of things because you are dissatisfied and like not trying to fix that and not talking about it is not going to help. It also doesn't sound like you specifically know what your situation is there with them. So like clarifying and making sure you are both on the same page before you go and hug up at somebody else. Nice thing to do. As for the other thing, what do I do if I catch feelings? You leave.

You remove yourself from the situation? Not necessarily because I guess it depends on the rules, right? Yeah, that's it. You say, oh, there's lots of rules. Great. Ask questions. These people seem like they know what they're doing, right? if there's a lot of rules, if there's a lot of boundaries and there's a lot of like,

hey, this is what we do and the here to here to do it. Chances are they, they're doing this correctly or at least like cautiously and respectfully, hopefully if the rules are what I assume they are. Honestly, I'm coming from it more on her side because being the outsider who isn't experienced in this and doesn't have the rules, at least like hasn't established them herself, I don't feel like she's going to be able to be in a relationship with feelings without it moving from what it already is or else though what do I do if I catch feelings wouldn't be an issue. So in my opinion, she should probably leave. Yeah. But I'm advocating to ask questions about what the nature of this swinging is.

Because you say that she has two long term partners. Are they just strictly sexual partners or is this also a polyamory situation? right like does her does wife also like go on dates like are they considered dating these people yeah because if you just occasional fucking yeah like if you end up catching feelings for this guy you might just end up being another partner in this yeah however many people are in this yeah so right like am i just using terms wrong or is swinging not really what should be applied here because swinging to me seems very specifically around like swinging parties and communities versus just being polyamorous here I wonder if this might be a lack of education on her point, right?

Where she, because a lot of people confuse and a lot of people immediately say like, when they meet a poly couple, people will be like, oh, they're swingers. It's like, well, they're not swingers. They're polyamorous. They're dating other people. They have relationships. Because like, it seems weird to be like, oh, she has two long-term partners. Yeah.

And then also call them swingers. Because like, not to say that swingers can't have long-term people that they swing with, but partners is a pretty specific term. Yeah, like it seems like there's something a little bit more than just, oh, these are the people that we only, you know, sleep with. Like, yeah. So that's why you clarify these things, right? You say, hey, or are you guys polyamorous?

Are you dating these people? Is it, is this a strictly sexual thing? Like, where do I fit into the dynamic of your relationship? If I do end up start having feelings for you, is that something that we can explore? Like, there's no harm in asking these questions. with people who are this open. Yeah. And when you get your answers, you have to be honest with yourself.

If they're like, oh, it's only sexual and you are concerned that you're going to catch feelings and that like you need to, one, be prepared then to leave if a sexual relationship isn't all that you're able to do. And also be honest with yourself in like, is it going to be worth it? Are you going to be so upset if you get to a point and catch feelings and have to leave that it's not worth doing?

Like, you know yourself better than anyone. So try to be honest and like, these problems off at the past rather than wait until it's too late. Yeah, right. Like if you ask this question, be like, hey, if I catch feelings, is there a possibility that we could build a relationship within the dynamic of your current one? And if he's like, no, it's just sex. We, me and my wife are our partners. We're married. We don't have outside sort of like emotional relationships with these people. It's just sexual. If that doesn't work for you, there's no harm and then saying, hey, unfortunately, I don't think that's going to work for me. I think I probably

would form an emotional bond with you. And if that's going to complicate things for you, it's definitely going to complicate things for me. I don't think this is going to work. Like there's no reason to ever not ask questions and not clarify things, especially when there are so many people involved. Like there's, what, five in this, I think, if my math is right? Yeah. Six, if you count your guy who kisses you on the cheek every week. Yeah, true. There's no harm in like clarifying these things and then making the call that's best for you. Like don't wait for things to go poorly.

And this is like, we talked about this. This is one of our big messages last year being like, break things off before they need to be broken off. Right. Like if your relationship isn't working, there's no harm in breaking up and ending a relationship before it needs to be ended. If you could see the end in this in the distance, like why wait until you crash into the wall? Yeah. If the car's on fire and you know you're going down the road and you're going to arrive there anyway, you can hop off. the burning car now, or you could continue to get burned and inhale smoke and maybe crash into a

wall on the way there. Explode. Yeah, if you're going to get there anyway, why suffer? So if you know things are going to go south, you could just remove yourself before you even get in that situation, right? It's like a lot of us are not very good at not being, you know, self-harming in that way, self-destructive, should I say. But it's a good habit to get into. So like try to avoid these things, try to look at past relationships where you've gotten into these situations and maybe go, huh, is there a thing I could do now to not get in that situation in the first place? Because, like, a lot of people I think, I don't know if they actually enjoy it, but they seem to be like magnets for like this drama and this pain and this like there's always an issue and there's

always a thing and they're always heartbroken and they're, it's like you kind of have a hand in that, right? You could just not be in these situations. So if you know it's bad for you, just don't get into it. There's, yeah, I mean, it sucks to say, but like, If every relationship is the worst thing you've ever been in and every person you date is the worst person you've ever dated, the common denominator is you, unfortunately, right? Like, you are, if you look at sort of the graph of your relationships, the one constant you. Not to say that you are the worst, like, you're not to say that you are the problem, but it's you are the one making the conscious choice to enter into these relationships that are bad. So at one, at some point in time, you need to take responsibility. and ask yourself the hard questions and then be honest with you yourself, which is the hard part, right? Yeah.

Asking yourself and looking at a situation being like, fuck, I know this is a bad idea. And then doing it anyway. Yeah, but like the hard part isn't like recognizing the bad idea because I think a lot of people are capable of that. The hard part is then doing the honest thing and being like, this is going to be bad for me long term and I'm not going to do it.

Because a lot of people want that instant gratification. They want the love bomb. They want the rough sex. They want the good sex. They want the like all the attention. But even though they know it's like, oh, this is a horrible person. This is a bad person who's going to treat me poorly. But there's a slipper of the one thing that I do like.

It's an approximation of it. Yay. Yeah. So just be honest with yourself. And then also take the rules to heart. Yeah. Don't think that you're going to change the dynamic. Right.

If someone says, hey, no, this is sex only. I will not pursue a relationship with you. Don't go into it thinking that like, I'll change it. I'll break through. That yeah, you'll want to leave your wife and like, like, don't do that. We don't do anything at my house.

And then you're like, keep pushing to go to their house or you keep pushing to stay over the night or whatever. Just like, be cool. Like this is a person you presumably should care about. You don't have to date them to care about them. So it's like you should care about the rules because you're caring about their partner and their life and everybody's happiness.

And it's like if that's a situation you're unwilling to honor, again, don't get into it. This is by Eastern Yogurt Changing underwear. Is this normal? I'm 19 year old female. I'm in a long-term relationship with 20-year-old male. I've been noticing when it's time to go down on him. He has a noticeably bad stench.

I mentioned to him and also saw the outside of his underwear had skib marks on them. He confessed that in order to save on laundry slash water. He wears one side of his underwear for a few days before flipping them inside out and then wears it for a couple more days. I was shocked and honestly disgusted. Consider breaking up with him.

I never really knows he had poor hygiene so this came as an utter shock to me. He tried telling me needs to fix it and change his underwear daily but he won't listen. His excuse is he's a broke college student. You have to ask, is this normal? Should I be absolutely disgusted and turned off by this? Should I break up with him? Really need help on what to do. No, it's not normal. What do you mean?

No. What do you mean? I know you do this. This upsets me on such a like fundamental level that is Yeah, like laundry is not that expensive. also you don't need like go and buy the cheapest fucking discount brand and do it in the fucking sink right like it's it's not hard you could do your laundry in the fucking tub you could do the laundry like if if you're so fucking broke that you can afford maybe one load of laundry a week sure that's fine save up your clothes do that but you should a either buy enough yeah have enough

underwear to last you a week you know change them every day wash it even do two weeks three You, like, if you have enough clothes to last you, because the thing is, like, it would be bizarre if you had enough T-shirts to last you to the next wash, but not enough underwear, right? Yeah. I mean, my problem is, I have too much underwear. I have enough. I feel like I've got a pretty appropriate level because they always gets the point with the holes in them, and then you're like, well, now I'm back to normal amounts of underwear.

But either way, it's like, underwear can be cheap. They can be really cheap. Again, depending where you're living. But everywhere I've been, underwear has been pretty fucking cheap. Maybe not the best brands, but you don't. need much to get yourself going, just have enough to get yourself to the next laundry day. And presumably you're washing your clothes at least semi regularly because, again, I can't imagine you have more T-shirts than underwear. And it's like, do you want to be stinky? Do you want to be

disgusting? Also, look, it doesn't even matter how broke you are. It doesn't matter what you want. If the person who wants to go down on you says, hey, you stink and I don't want to suck your dick anymore, I don't care what your reasoning is. I don't care how strongly you believe in it. You fucking change your shit. Yeah. Also, like literally, what matters more than that? What could you possibly be saving up for that matters more than someone who loves you sucking you off? Yeah. Nothing is better than that. You could, the money you've saved on, or you've lost now washing a couple dollars, presumably, you've gained so much more in spirit. Honestly, I would not be surprised if like a load of laundry now at like a college campus was like four dollars a wash. Like I bet it's almost 10 bucks to do

like a full, like wash dry cycle. Yeah, which sucks. And like I did the entire time of this question, want to just be like in this economy. That's where we're at. But you know what? You can't. Do it in the sink.

It's just like your underwear, small. Bring them in. It doesn't matter. It does not matter. Please. You got to wash. That's the thing.

It's kind of a non-negotiable, right? You just got to be not a stinky mess. That's back on Amazon and buy a bulk pack of underwear. So that you could just like, I know it's going to. Yes. do all the things. You can't do this. You can't live like this. If the second someone, if someone I was hooking up with mentioned had the balls, had the like bravery to say, hey. Because it's, it's hard

to say. You're stinky. In just any regard. Not even, not even in the downstairs region. Just like, hey, I want to keep hooking up with you, but your hygiene is real bad. I would change my life to fix that. Right. Like I would. And not because a woman told me that and not because I'm horny. It would be a helpful factor in the case, but like, I don't want to be stinky. I'll be sure embarrassment. I don't want to be. Yeah. I'm like shame.

Yes. Now, also, there's, the other thing is, look, I could wear my underwear for a week and there would not be a skid mark. Yeah. In these, these underwear. So not only is this man not washing his laundry. The man's also not washing his butt. Yeah. Yeah.

Actually, you know what? Why don't why we're giving this guy advice? Just dump this man. Yes. to the lovely young lady who is doing her her best to fix this solution, this isn't your problem anymore. Get out. Just run. If you need to explain to an adult man why he needs to wash his underwear and his ass, he's not ready to have sex. He's not ready to be part of society. Especially a man with a visible shit crust on the outside of his underwear. If you need to explain that, hey, something has gone wrong here. That's gross. Yeah. And not only that, but wore it to.

a date or a hookup, right? Like, if this is your state, if you are in such dire straits, surely, surely you could say, hey, maybe I'll bust out one of them pristine ones for this hookup. Yeah. But no, he's just, it drives me. It's insane. It's crazy to me. It's bad.

And the worst part is we always get questions like this. Man, yeah. What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you fucking doing? You got it. I had these guys at the, so the, I don't remember what day it was, but it was last weekend. And I had these two guys and they were like, they were young.

They were, I was really on the fence about IDing them, but I once they like talked to them and got a better look at them, I was like, okay, you're old enough. But they were young and they were so fucking, it was, it was refreshing because they actually had a conversation. They said things to each other. There was like, there was actual thought behind what they were saying to one another. They tipped me very well. And then they left. And then almost immediately they were replaced with three dudes. who I think talked about shitting their pants for at least an hour.

And other than that, they were just talking about like, like pissing their pants. I don't like, it was so fucking weird. How do you wash the shit out if you don't piss them, Dan? I was just like, what are you doing? There was also a group of like very attractive young ladies right next to them. And I'm like, at one point in time, the one guy was like trying to like hit on them. And they were having none of it. I was like, hey, dude, when you loudly talk about how many times you've shit your pants,

I don't think anyone's going to be, you know, snatching up your, your pickup lines, my dude. Well, women like when you do impressive stuff and what's more impressive than holding the world record for shitting yourself. It, I was just like, what, like, why are, why do I have to hear this? What I don't listen to this? Why do you not understand that like this isn't funny? I don't know. Like, it's, are you well? Are you sick?

You should not be shitting your pants as much. Did you see the, there's like a comedian recently when other rails was going. and viral where it's like straight men don't have allergies. They just have years of unexplained diarrhea. It's just like pretty funny. The, I don't know, the like weird phenomena

and I don't know if this is just Reddit because this is where I see most of it, but like the weird sort of like just, what's the word I'm looking for? Sort of a, not assumption or agreement, but just like acceptance that men shit their pants all the time. It's like, I've never

done this. Yeah. Right. Like, I've, and this is coming from a man who has had years of bad stomach problems. I've never shit my pants. I was, uh, I met a guy who, I think I was traveling. No, he was talking about when he was traveling. I met him in university over here. And like one day he was just like, said something like when he shit himself in Thailand. It was like, yeah, yeah, we all shit ourselves.

And I was like, no. No. He got so angry. He was like, you just fucking lie, bro. You're fucking lie. I'm like, I just have a shit myself. That's fine, though. He's like, everyone's just,

some selves. Everyone should some selves. I was like, well, no. He was like, well, people travel do. And I was like, I've traveled so much. It was like, I was so angry. I was like, dude, like, there's nothing wrong with having a mistake, I guess. But like, there is something wrong, I think, about being like, this is an okay, normal thing to do. This is normal. Like, without kind of an extenuating circumstance. Yeah. And even just the amount of questions we get in where it's like, man, don't clean their asses. Man, don't clean their underwear. Man, don't change their underwear. No. Stop. If you sit on something and make it stinky, reassess your life.

If you just stinky, reassess your life. If you stinky, try not to be stinky. It's good for you and everybody else. Just do your best. And look, look, if you have a medical condition that makes it hard to not be stinky, I apologize. That's tough. That's rough. Yeah, but that's obviously not what we're talking about.

So get the fuck out of here with that. No, you know, you know we got your bag. If you got a condition, that's fine. But if you got a condition, I'm sure you're still trying to deal with it. So this isn't about you. You know it's not about you. You're good. get over yourself get the fuck out of here

all right hit me dang uh this is me isn't it this is low ejaculate volume by correct ad i'm starting to wonder if there's an issue with my ejaculation volume i'm 33 always had a super high libido and sex is great overall except for one thing and don't ejaculate very much i haven't measured exactly but it's definitely under two milliliters i've never worried about it because i've been coming at least once a day since i was a team. But lately, I tried a three-day abstinence period, thinking I'd get a bigger load next time. Unfortunately, there was only a slight improvement, nothing noticeable. I followed online advice,

drinking at least 1.5 liters of water a day, which I wasn't doing before. Never drink alcohol, never smoke, not overweight. He gives his like stats. My partners have never- 12, strength 18. Yeah, he's six to 163 pounds, which I feel like is very skinny. That seems very skinny, yeah. My partners have never commented, but I, it's starting to really bother me, especially because I really want children soon. So I'm scared that this might be a fertility issue. I'm thinking about smoking a doctor's appointment for tests to know if there's an issue. Do you think I should be worried?

Well, if it's less than two milliliters, we've already talked about this before, 1.25 millimeters to 5 millimeters is the usual cum range. To 5 millimeters? 5 millimeters, yeah, I believe so. That's crazy. Yeah. That's a big variation. Yeah, yeah, 1.1.1.

1.25 to 5 is the average. Like, that's the regular kind of amount, which is, again, a huge variation. So you could almost be, like, halfway under what you think and still be within normal ranges. So I don't know why you're worrying because, one, partners haven't said anything about it, right? Two, I'm pretty sure the amount you come doesn't have any bearing on how fertile you are. No. It's all about your sperm to seem, like sperm to volume ratio kind of thing. Yeah, like when you get a fertility test, they don't just go, that's a lot.

Damn, that man, that man come buckets. He's going to have kids for days. Yeah, it's like you could ejaculate like a fucking fire hose and not be able to have children because. So when I was looking this up, there is, there's like a test to see how many of your, your sperm actually have like forward mobility. And that is like the guiding factor of, of how fertile you are because of, you know, how strong your swimmers are, which I thought was interesting. It's not really like the amount that you are ejaculating. It's how powerful they are. It is how mobile they are.

Their forward mobility. Or if you don't have the forward mobility, you just got to come backwards. Or break their ankle, spin it around. Yeah. It was the throwback to my ankle. It was like, whose ankle are you breaking? Your partners, the Siemens. The sperm.

They already have tails day and they don't need that. There's one. There's one that comes. Every time you come, there's one that has, feet. That's the real test is how many of your comb has feet. Look, your partners don't mind. You seem to be within healthy limits. So I think you need to take a breath. If you are concerned about fertility and it's a thing that's affecting your life, which it seems like it is because you've written this question, by all means, go book a test. At least if it's going to make you feel better

about yourself or worse, I don't know, but at least if you have answers and you think that'll be a good thing, go get those answers. It doesn't sound like you have a partner right now. So So I don't know if you need to worry about fertility until you find someone you want to have a kid with. But again, if it's something you're worried about, by all means, go get checked out. But like, I will say on the other side, you're saying you've come once a day for like basically forever. No wonder you've got a low fucking cum count, bro. And also you waited once, but it was only two days. Like, uh, it was three days now.

Oh, okay. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah, no wonder you're dribbling out. Yeah, you are, you're a cum machine. Yeah, you're just top echelons of like. just coming so much. So maybe give it a week or two, which obviously won't be able to do.

Maybe see a doctor for that. I agree. If you're, if this is like eating you up inside, one, also, I don't understand, like, you followed online advice for, for drinking water and all this, but you didn't Google how much cum was average, like, you fall directly into the,

into the middle of like what an average person can ejaculate. So I don't, like, where, why why are you looking for solutions before you know if there's a problem but I feel like that's a lot of people with sexual health related stuff but as now said go see a doctor and I think this is a good point for anyone I mean like for people who can afford health care if you have a concern instead of spiraling about it or going online and being misinformed by some shitty AI, go to a doctor and say, hey, I'm concerned about X. I'm concerned about why. Is there something we can do to test that? Is there something we can do to check that? Can you look at this and

get it looked at? Because if you're like, if you're worried, if you got a bump, you could freak out and like take a picture of it and post it and be like, what does this look like? And then a bunch of idiots on Reddit are going to be like, it's whatever. That means nothing. Go to a doctor. If you're, If you're that concerned about it, if you're freaking out, if you're losing sleep, if you're writing posts about how much you're coming, go see a doctor. And I know that's not an option for everyone because healthcare sucks in a lot of places, specifically one. But also, like, if that's the case, the bare minimum you could do is measure what you're doing and just look up how much is normal. Which if you did, it's to be one of the few times that actually looking up the thing you need to know would give you a clear reassuring answer. Yeah.

Instead of WebMD being like, well, you're dying. Yep. It is leukemia. Yeah. You could have scraped yourself or death. Seek amputation immediately. Immediately. That's going to do it for us, guys.

That's it. We did it. I love you. We do love you. Thank you for coming. Two millimeters. Yeah. We hope that you had fun.

If you did have fun, go join us on Patreon right now. Or Dane's going to show up your door? Yeah, I'll just be there. He'll be there. I'll be like that knife pirate that's going around on Reddit. I'll rummage around under your, uh, under your rugs. You did see that video I sent you. It was horrifying. Yeah. Yeah, it's terrifying. It's the scariest thing I've ever seen. And I'll do that to your house if you don't join the Patreon. I don't do anything criminal. I will, I'll just walk shirtless, stare into your ring camera, search under your mats for a key and have a knife in my mouth. I don't know if I mentioned the knife in the mouth yet, but I will have it. That's horrifying. Don't look this video up. It'll scar you for, there's something about videos being on ring cameras that makes them so scary. Do you ever show you the video for? Do you ever show you the video for?

my ring cam where like it like garbled my face and I look like a monster randomly. No, but I believe it. Yeah, it's terrible. Anyway, please join us on Patreon. Help support the show. Keep it going. If you can't do that or you don't want to, share us on all the social medias, tell a friend, post about us on Reddit, let people know.

There's always someone being like, hey, I want to find a podcast with like positive male people talking or like, hey, sex and dating or even funny stuff. Hopefully we're at least two of those three. And I promise you, you know someone who needs to listen to this show. You have a friend who's struggling, who is making bad decisions, who is sad or needs help. He doesn't wash his ass. Doesn't wash their ass. When he sits down, there's an audible crack as his stiffened boxers flex.

You got this. All right. Thank you, Josh Eagle and Harvesties for the song Paper Stars. Are you ready for a little bad sex writing? Yeah. This is going to be an excerpt from the novel, Sweet Berries. If this was what all mothman could do, someone needed to. to alert the media. Alert Congress. They need to be at the headline of every newspaper. The only story

talked about on the news. Hot, single mothman with dice and strength tongues and vibrating dicks are in the neighborhood near you. Hell yeah. Everyone always like, oh, mothman can see the future. Uh-uh. Incorrect. He can make people come with his vibrating dick. Maybe for that last question, maybe just become a mothman. Yeah, true. We solved it. Easy peasy. My name is Dane Miller. And I'm not in Spain. We've been your fuck buddies. You know,