F*ck Buddies: A Sex and Dating Advice Podcast - Sk8er Boi

Episode Date: June 8, 2026

You start dating this guy, but you don't really think it's going to go anywhere (because you're a good girl) and the next thing you know... he's slamming on his guitar on MTV. Topics include how dating as a man should be, dating a punk while you're a good girl, escaping the dreaded on-screen boob, Dylan a little dumb.Support us on Patreon! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello friends. My name's Dane Lloyd. And I'm Nile Spain. And we're your fuck buddies. We're a sex and dating advice podcast where we take your sticky, sexy situations. Try them into sexy, sticky situations. We find them online. We find them from your wonderful twisted brains. And we answer right here. Questions. Okay. I'm pretty sure you said it.

Did I? I don't know. Yeah, you're sticky, sexy situations. We get them from your brain. Okay. Or from the internet. Yeah. I don't need to be interrogated this early in the episode, Dane. And we answer them right here right now every Monday and once a month on Patreon, which you should join to support us. Keep bread in our mouths. Yeah, because if I don't have a piece of bread in my mouth, at all times, I go crazy.

Like Marlon Brando, Godfather. Marlon Braddo. Is he into bread? He shoved cotton balls into his mouth. That's why he talks like that. I think that's Godfather. Whatever one he's in. That's fair.

He was talking like this because he's got fucking cotton balls. That's, you're mixing, you always mix those two up. Yeah, it was meatballs. He's got meatballs in his mouth. Man, I wish I had meatballs in my mouth. This week we're going to talk about, is it just me? Or is this how dating is a man is supposed to be?

Not sure whether to end my situation ship. How can I approach my girlfriend about letting me enjoy movies that have explicit content? Two clueless friends and one girl. I've seen that movie. Yeah. All right, this is by Complete Primary 2610. Is it just me or is this how dating is a man is supposed to be? Trying to figure out my experience and dating is the standard reality of how things work

or if I'm doing something wrong. My experience, the effort, I pay for everything, give her all my time and attention, keep things entertaining so she doesn't get bored, the focus. I'm always trying to show I'm a good man by looking up for expectations, handling the criticism, making sure she's happy with me. Intimacy. This is treated as a big no-no. I should never mention it.

She's the only one who's the right to open and close that topic. feels one-sided because I don't get the same treatment in return, so it feels like an audition. What my friends say. Some say this is normal in the beginning, and things will balance out once she's comfortable. Some say I'm being used and I'm setting an unhealthy dynamic from the start. Some say it's an attraction issue because when someone isn't fully attracted to you, they make you prove yourself more. Is this how I should date as a man?

I'm not just being a people-pleaser. I really know what you're talking about. in the sense that you've kind of just said chat cheap T bullshit and like you haven't really given any examples right? Yes, the examples with help.

What do you mean by like intimacy is only a thing that she's allowed to open and close? I kind of like understand where that is coming from. Like there are you know, there are toxic relationships out there where like you know one person is kind of the arbiter of sexuality where it's like if you bring it up or if you're like suggesting things, they're like, well, what the fuck?

But like when they do it, it's fine. Like, that's a thing we've had to deal with before. So, like, I get it. Yeah. Okay. It's not good, though. I think we can both agree on that. I don't, like, does this sound good in any regard, whether you're a man or not?

No. None of this is good. Like, if you're paying for everything and the other person is, is never offering to help or contribute financially, that's bad. If you're the only one who seems to be putting in any effort to, like see each other or maintain like any sort of interest also bad. Yeah. And if you can't talk about like sex or initiate sex or like any sort of conversation

about where you guys are intimately, also bad. So yeah. I don't know how you could sit there and be like, is this just the way it's supposed to be? Like surely you've seen like hopefully you have friends. who have partners who aren't like this. I don't know. Some of their friends say it's normal, right? So it's like, we're here to tell you it's not.

Not normal. It's not normal. You don't have to settle for this. And in fact, I would say you shouldn't. Yeah. Now, I do think, like, maybe you should look at a couple things. One, the kind of women you are approaching and, like, courting. Do they seem wildly uninterested in you from the get-go?

Perhaps you don't throw yourself at people who don't want to like reciprocate a relationship or affection with you, right? Like if you're only going after women who very obviously put you on the back burner, knock it off. go after someone who actually seems to enjoy your company and build a relationship off that instead of maybe like, I don't know, paying for a premium version of an app and only going for the women who are in like the, you know, the, the, what's called Rose Jail on Hinge or things like that. Like, you know, because it's obviously not working for you. I don't know why. I don't know if it's a, you know, you're not, I don't want to be mean, but like that attractive

or you're not that charismatic or whatever, right? Like there's something attractive level not working with you or, or vibing with you? Or you're just going after shitty beef. True. I also just assume it's like an outlook thing, right? Because they're in this situation. And I double checked as well because I was going to say,

it sounds like first girlfriend syndrome. But no, apparently you're right. This is a repeating pattern in their life. And it's like the fact that you don't know that this is wrong shows that your outlook is wrong, which means you're getting into situations where you can be kind of like taken advantage of it this way, right? So it's like, you need to shift your mentality immediately to the point where like equality is fine.

You know what I mean? You're allowed also get enjoyment out of a relationship. You don't just have to be, because it almost feels like nice guy syndrome where it's like I'm always trying to be like do everything for her and show that I'm a good man and, you know, I pay for everything and I blah blah. And it's like maybe maybe take that back a notch. You know what I mean? Because people are going to see that from a mile away.

And the kind of people who are going to want to date that are the kind of people that want to take advantage of that, right? And the average normal person isn't going to want to date like dormat guy, right? Yeah. So take a breath. Realize that relationships are meant to be a relationship and not a, you know, employment. You know what I mean? Yeah, like a circus act in which you're the one jumping through the hoops only to keep them entertain. Like you're not dating a toddler, right?

Like you're not the photographer, we hope. You're not the photographer at like a kid's like photo studio where you're constantly like, look over here, hunker, hunker, hunker, hunker, and like jingling keys and shit to like keep their attention. And if you are, then you're with the wrong person. Yeah. Right. Like if this is, if you feel like you're having to jump through hoops and constantly like do

gambits and bits and skits to entertain someone, then maybe they're not the right fit for you. for whatever reason. And maybe you should find someone who is just as into you as you are into them. Yeah, if you constantly feel the need to do like skits and bits, maybe consider podcasting. Yeah. As we can tell, women love that. Women, I love it. They cannot get enough of a dude with a podcast.

We don't give that advice enough, actually. Yeah, because we can't possibly have any more podcasts we've made. We can't be responsible. We don't want more competition. That's true. And also, look, a lot of the people asking the questions on the begin on this show probably shouldn't have a podcast. Dane did not come to play this morning. Yeah, it's early.

I'm in a weird state of not quite sick, but also very allergy. So, uh, I'm spicy. Yeah, I finally slept. I couldn't sleep for like the last three days. And I didn't sleep last night. But then at 7 a.m., I fell deeply asleep. and then when I woke up to record, I was very sad. And there was like, can't I text day and say, let's leave it for hours so I can just fall back

and sleep. But I didn't. You did text me, gooden morning. And I've just reacted with the crying emoji. At least I knew you were alive. Yeah. This is not how dating goes. It is not how dating goes for men.

It is not how dating goes for, or at least it isn't how dating should go. Don't settle for anything less than what you want, what you need, what you deserve, right? have equality, have happiness. If not, you're doing it wrong and you shouldn't settle for it. Yeah. Just take a moment and like peel away sort of what you think things should be like. And think about, you know, what your friends say is normal or isn't normal. And think about what you want.

Like, is this a satisfying relationship situation for you? Do you feel good about it? Do you like it? Does it make you happy? And chances are, based on this question, the answer to those are no. So it doesn't matter if this is how it should be. A hundred percent. Fuck how it should be.

Yeah, if you're not enjoying it and you're not happy and it doesn't feel good to you, don't do it. Stop doing it and change something. Either the kind of women you're going after, the way you approach dating, your perspective, your mindset, or maybe start a podcast. God, we cannot. Don't. We'll find you. We'll fucking, we'll collaborate with you. And then we won't even show up to the record.

We'll do a guest episode and we won't even post about it. Whoa. Well, you know what? We'll get you in the closet and we'll record you from a laptop mic on the other side of the room. All right. Let's... What you got? Do another one.

Oh, it's not on my phone. It's on my computer today. Silly me. This is... Goirly pop. You got so loud. Oh, I don't know. I don't know why.

Weird. Okay. Not sure whether to end situation ship. Hello, all. So the title suggests. I'm currently unsure as to whether to end my situation ship or continue to go with the flow. I, a 28-year-old female, met this guy, 33-year-old male, on a dating app about three months ago. Right after our first date, he mentioned that he's in the middle of transitioning into a new career, to be determined, and wasn't in a place for anything serious.

I was happy with that because I also wasn't looking for anything, and he wasn't what I was looking for on paper. He's alternative punk rock, and I'm a good girl. As time has progressed, though, he started acting more. more like a boyfriend. He comes to pick me up from work. He buys me gift. He cooks for me. He wants to hang out every few days. He plans dates for us. He texts me all the time, etc. This has made me confused because it contradicts the idea of casual. The problem that he's inconsistent. Like some days he's there, others, he's not, which makes me sense, or which makes sense because we're casual, and it's starting to bother me, which I now know means that I've caught feelings. This last week,

we had a fight, because I could tell he was really anxious to resolve it and made statements like, I really miss you, could we please talk about this? I really like you, and it's scaring me, etc. My friends are saying for me to break up with him because they feel like he's already written me off as just casual due to the fact that we're so different in terms of career, with me being, quote unquote, out of his league, his words, and that of his friends, and him always comparing us indirectly. Alian avoidant, and so all these feelings are so, overwhelming to me, particularly the idea that I potentially like him more that he likes me. It also bothers me this idea he keeps saying of me being, quote unquote, out of his league,

since I don't like or see it that way and almost makes me feel like he's penalizing me for my hard work. I guess my question is, do I end it because of the fact that probably won't progress or do I give the time to see where it goes? And we both get to a place where we want to be with each other completely. No, I think what you're doing now is pretty perfect. Like don't, communicate at all. Yeah. Like do not like never talk to him especially. Yeah.

Talk to your shitty friends. They seem to have their finger on the pulse for sure. They know what's going on. And also I think that you've already done a bit of this, but I think you should maybe double down a little bit more on it. If you're a good girl and he's like punk rock, like do you not have your like your clique chart? Because if you don't have your clique chart, how are we like, you know good girls can own like

what the fuck you talking about? I'm a good girl, but he's punk rock. Are you 12? Yeah. That's so embarrassing. I don't know. It's obvious. He was a skater boy.

Yeah. You did ballet. What more could you say? It's time to say you see you later, skater boy. Yeah, but then he's going to have a great fucking show. Yeah. All your shitty friends are going to go. And this is it.

And you're going to be there like, damn it. I wasn't out of this league. If you don't stick around, Avril Avivine will scoop this boy. Yeah. Yeah. She's waiting in the wings. She's a big old net. It's perfect for punk boys.

You look, girl, one, you really got to stop taking your, like, self-imposed, like, label so seriously. That's so fucking cringe. I'm sorry. You got to stop. As a podcast or no. You got to stop. Two, what do you want? And why don't you ask for that?

It's stupid. It's stupid thing. Yeah. I think I should break up with them because these other people are saying it. Okay, but what do you want? Well, I think he might feel about me this way. Okay, what do you want? Also, I love that she's like, I don't think he's really into me and written me off as being casual.

My dude says, I'm really anxious or like, I really miss you. I want to talk about this. I really like you and it's scaring me. How does it sound like he's written you off? Like, yeah, also halfway through the question, she was like, I don't know. He does all these things that are really nice. So I'm a little worried he likes me. So one, you can be nice and should be nice in casual situations.

So I'm not too concerned about that. This guy just seems cool. But yeah, stop making assumptions and get fucking answers. And now we've got to talk about this. And we've talked about it before. But I know you. I can sense it dripping through this question. You are 100% of what are we, girly pop.

You are not a present what you want, girly pop. And you need to be. You need to say to this man, one, figure out what the fuck you want because it's kind of unclear. I think you want to be with this guy. So be with them, right? Say, hey, I've been really enjoying this casual thing. But I've actually developed feelings for you. and like I would actually like to see if we could take this a little further.

Like, what do you think? How do you feel? And then if he goes, hell yeah, this has been great. Got him to know you. Let's give it a shot. Or he goes, I'm really sorry. I'm still between jobs or whatever. And I just want to keep a casual. And then it's on you to decide, does that still work for you or does it not?

That's it. It's super easy. It is super easy. And this person seems kind of cool. So I don't think this problem or this conversation will be problematic. my my only thing is the if he is constantly being like you're out of my league you're out of my league that's my only red flag for this guy yeah there is an element of like lameness to it but like maybe he's just insecure about his job maybe it's that her shitty friends say it to him all the time um it

it is be weird i don't love it yeah so but hey this is where having a conversation helps you can actually bring this up to him and be like hey i really don't like when you say that i'm out of your league. I think she does like it, though. Maybe. I get the feeling she also kind of thinks she's out of his league. Maybe. That's kind of the vibe I get. And if that is the case, you need to sort your shit out. But yeah, the thing is, when someone says that to you, you say no, you're not. Because if you are,

why are you seeing them firstly? And two, why would you let them continue to believe this? You take them in and be like, hey, and especially if it bothers you, you, be like, look, it really doesn't make me feel good when I hear that shit. I think you're great. You should think you're great, too. Yeah, that's it, right? Like, if someone said that to me. I would, I would switch modes to repair that. I would be, I would go in repair mode to be like, I don't like that and I don't want you to feel that way. So we're going to have a little conversation about it and we're, I'm going to try to reassure you that that is not the case. Yeah. Because I don't want to date someone who thinks they're below me. I want to date someone who, where we're on the same

even playing field, right? Like I don't want to feel like I have power over someone because of an insecurity. Yeah, and I don't want them to feel lesser. Yeah, whatever the situation is, right? Like, if I don't feel like we're both coming from it at the same, like, position of power, I'm going to be uncomfortable. So we're going to resolve that ASAP. So the fact that you haven't made any effort to do that is strange to me. Unless you have and it hasn't been here, but you should. You should. Yeah. So figure out what you want, have a straight of conversation, presenting what you want. Don't, what are we this man? and then see what comes of it. And like if he says no, then figure out if you're still good with the casual thing.

If you're not, this is good because now you've come to a decision. You've put your cards on the table. You've aimed for what you wanted and maybe you haven't gotten it, but you have gotten what you need. Right? So it's like it's win-win, right? Because if they're not into it, you've still tried and now you're getting out of a bad situation, right?

Which, yeah, maybe you could have gotten out of that situation without having the conversation, but then you wouldn't know, right? You'd be like, what? Maybe I should have. maybe I shouldn't have. Like, this is the best route forward, arguably the only one unless you want to do bad things to yourself. Yeah, and also, like, you're in a relationship with another human being.

They kind of deserve a say in the relationship as well, right? Like, it's, it's kind of shitty if you're just like, I don't need to talk to them about anything. Granted, if you don't feel like you want to pursue the relationship, that's fine. You can break, like, you don't need permission to break up with someone. Yeah. If this question was, I want to break up with them, how do I do it? Or should I? We'd be like, just fucking do it.

Yeah. I do want to touch on some things that, like, you brought up briefly where she's talking about the things that he's doing, right? Like, he's coming to pick me up from work. He buys me gifts. He cooks for me. All those things are casual. Yeah. Like, that's another thing is like, you seem to have a toxic view of being casual of just like, oh my God, he's nice to me. Yeah, he's nice to me. He wants to spend time with me. He wants to talk to me. He wants to do things with me. Yeah. That's not not casual. Casual is a sort of parameter that's added to your relationship. in terms of exclusivity, commitment, like that kind of stuff, right? Yeah, it doesn't necessitate a lack of kindness, a lack of effort, a lack of whatever. Yeah. It's, he's putting in the amount of effort that he's willing to put into a relationship with you, but also not being committed, not being exclusive, not being monogamous, just like, and, you know, for all we know, he is monogamous in the sense that, like, maybe he's not sleeping with anyone else or dating anyone else, right?

Or he is, and it doesn't happen that either, right? Yeah. Yeah. that is a kind of a toxic mindset you seem to have as well. Step away from that, please. Yeah. Like, we, we're big fans of the casual doesn't mean cold.

And this, this dude seems to be embodying that quite well. So don't use that as ammunition against him. Yeah. I think what's happening is you're being treated well by someone. Mm-hmm. And it's freaking you out. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Like, I think you are panicking and being like, oh, no, this guy who's, who's supposed to be casual, which I equate with being shitty to me. is actually being really nice to me and doing nice things and I'm enjoying it. And now I'm freaking the fuck out. Yeah. And then you don't know where to go vis-a-vis your feelings and how to proceed.

But you got to sit down and just figure that out. Do you want to date this man? If so, tell him. Yeah. Or if you just want to keep doing what you're doing, you need to sit down and be like, hey, I'm being irrational. I'm projecting a lot of shit onto him. And I've, I need to like, you know what I mean? Like, you need to do some self-reflection and be like, oh, this stuff that he's doing can be casual is normal and is nice and I like it. So why am I freaking out about it? Why am I listening to my

stupid friends about it? I will say if you are concerned that he's like if let's say you don't want a relationship like Damon is saying you do want to keep casual but you're worried he wants more. You can still bring that up. I've had to do that many times in a relationship being like, hey, I get the impression you want more and it just hasn't come out yet. Like are you happy with things as they stand? Like because I still want things to be casual. I just want to make sure we're on the same page. Then he will say yes or no. And again, back to the situation where you just decide, do you want to continue knowing this new truth, right? Yeah. One of the key things of being in a casual relationship is a pretty consistent check-in. And it doesn't have to be like,

every week I'm going to be like, are we still casual? Like, it just has to be when you get a vibe. Yeah, because a week, a week is too long. It's got to be hourly. Yeah. Yeah. And we have an app actually on our, on our web store that will just send them an hourly. We casual still? reply wire and and they have to pay to get out of it which is cool for us and it's a little like raccoon emoji guy he's just gonna go a raccoon so they don't take it like too casually right like we want them to know it's fun but it's serious and the more you use it the more you like get them cool new weapons and armor he starts off with like a little like like a cap gun kind of like so it's not that threatening but as you upgrade you get like a laser site you get to get the AK maybe

Yeah We're going to take a quick break Because I do have to Feed the raccoon Feed the raccoon So we're right back In like You know

Five 10 minutes Well It will be that long The raccoon is very unhappy With me Oh my god He fucking shot Dane Oh God

Oh no he's shot Dane Oh fuck Do not download the app Don't download the app There's a glitch He's in real life I watched ladies first last night. How's that?

It's a new Sasha Bear Coen movie. Okay. Where he's like a shitty ad executive. And he ends up bonking his head and transporting to a world where gender roles are reversed essentially. And now all the women are in power and men are treated like women are treated. And I was excited by the idea. It sounded funny. And it's charming.

It's a charming little movie. Sasha Baron Cohen, though, do we think he's going to do justice to this idea? Because I, knowing nothing about this, think not. It is, it is quite, like, endearing. Like, he, this is the first time I've ever seen him play, like, a person and not a... Well, so, like, roles are reverse. So, instead, Boris, just, like, my wife. But he's not, he's not, like, a crazy character.

Like, he's not doing what he normally does where he, like, assumes a persona. Like, he's just playing a guy. I figure, I figure. But I found that, like, they did this weird thing where the women just did the things that men did. Instead of allowing women to remain, like, women. And the male, like, the things that dudes did were viewed as, right? So, like, at one point in time, he was in a meeting and trying to talk. And they were like, oh, you're being, like, crazy.

You're being irrational. Which was funny. But then there was another scene where, like, they were shopping. and the woman was carrying all the bags and like waiting outside. And I was like, this doesn't make much sense. Yeah. Right? Like, I wish it was like, I wish the men.

They put a little bit more thought into it and were like, like, what would this look like, you know, if the patriarchy was a feminarchy? Yes, right. Like, it would still be men being used for their like physical strength. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like, the woman would still like make them carry the bad. Like, you know, there was just things like that where I was like, I really wish it. it went a little bit more into like, oh, it's not that like men are men is the problem.

It's the behavior set of the problem. And it would be funny to see them. I don't know. It was one of those things where I just feels like very surface level. Like they just did a direct flip. Yeah. It kind of felt like how I felt with the Barbie movie where I was like, I don't really know if we need a movie being like interrupting women is bad.

Being mean to women is bad. Sexualizing women is bad. You know what? Judging by the response where people were like, this is groundbreaking. I'm like, yeah, if you've never watched a movie, but like, damn, I think that shows we do need it, right? Again, it was a great movie. I liked it, but I mean, the amount of people who acted as if they'd never heard any feminist theory prior to that movie and we're just like, what the fuck?

Especially the speech that America Forever does in it. Yeah. Where she's like, you know, oh, we can't be to this or to that. It's like, have you never like, like, this seen that one girl from high school's fucking story every week? Yeah, or any valedictorian speech done. I guess we're just very lucky that the women in our lives are strong, powerful, intelligent women. You know what I mean? So like these concepts aren't new to us.

So and you're right. Like the fact that it resonated with so many people and so many people were like, whoa, obviously implies that we need this, right? Like there's a void that needs to be filled. And, you know, even just the fact that we do this show. week after week after week, we see the same questions. It is funny. Like, we don't live in the same world as people where, like, I was at a bachelor party in Belfast a couple weeks ago.

And while we were on the train, someone was like, hey, have you heard like of this, like disgusting term? I'm like, yeah, it's this. And they were like, how do you know that? I'm like, podcast man. I was like, what about this one? They were like, oh, what's that? I'm like, oh, no, I live in this world where you just kind of assume everyone's where

you're at, they're not, for better or for worse. It's tough, especially as a bartender. I overhear things And like it's a lot of it is AI based where like It blows my mind that there are Still people who are like AI is crazy bro

It's so cool bro I'm like surely you must know by now Like that it sucks shit and it's so lame But yeah There are still people who who still think that like I don't know not having to write an email is like groundbreaking I'm like It's an email bro

Yeah it's if you're It's pretty much the easy. And I get it. I hate writing professional emails. You know what I mean? But it's not that bad. You know what I mean? Like I fucking hate doing them.

And it's not that bad, right? You really don't need to do much. I had a, like a family in the other day. It was like two women and two kids who were obviously like, you know, one kid was each of theirs, whether it was their own kid or like they were like the ants taking them out. I wasn't really sure what the deal was. But they spent the entire conversation, essentially just like teaching them the AI sucked shit.

And I was like, that's great. It was really nice to hear. And every time I went by, they were just like dropping facts. And I was like, yeah, guys. And they were so lovely. I was like, this is a good table. These kids are in the right hands. Yeah.

I mean, like, it seems like we kind of fucked up Gen Z. Gen Z, I think, is a write-off. I don't know where we were. Don't say we. No, no. Yeah. It was less. The society kind of really.

The people in power saw, millennials and went can't have more of that. Yeah, can't do this again. Genuinely, like, they were like, the tide is about to turn and I don't want to get torn limb from limb. So we need, make a little poison machine and just drip it into jazzy heads. Uh, and it works. Fair play.

A brain poison. Yeah, and we are going to mainline it. And I do believe Fortnite is to blame, really. I think it is TikTok, although I do regularly while playing Fortnite, call it TikTok, because I'm an old man, I guess. So, because you've gotten a

brain poisoned too. I do, yeah. My brain is firmly poisoned. Uh, yeah. You know, speaking of movies and TV shows and stuff, have you seen and or heard of the, like, rom-com series off campus? I've heard of it, yes. Okay. I assume you haven't watched any of it. I haven't. So there is this, like, there's all these jocks and a frat and, like, one of the characters is, like, always having sex, like very promiscuous, like fucking women left, right and center. Uh, but he's not really prominent for, for the first bit. And then the main character, I, point, like talks to him in the gym. And essentially he's been asked to make the like female main character like come. She comes to him. He's like, I need you to give me an orgasm. He's like,

oh, shit. So he's had a bunch of sex, but it's like insecure that he can like deliver. So he goes to this guy who's fucking everybody all the time. And the guy is like, oh, let me tell you. There's one like surefire technique that like always works every time. I think he's like, yeah. He's like, it's trust, man. She's got to trust you, you know? And like, you, you know? And like, you, You gotta make sure the consent is there. Like make sure that, you know, you really like, if she trusts you and like that you guys are at the right part. So like, don't rush it.

Don't hurry. And like, man, four play. Make it five play. Six play even. Like you could. And I was just like, hell yeah. Like this is, it was such a surprising like twist on the like shitty, you know, sexually active shot guy.

I don't know if he gets worse later on in the series. But it felt like he was going to be that shitty character. And yet like it was actually a very like heartwarming, like, nice. moment and also a lot of the other man in the frat while still being like frat bros who drink and party and blah blah blah they like check in with each other and like one of them is like having an argument with their dad and he's like oh man just talk to your dad like you know you'll get through it and it's like it's honestly like it's it's not bad oh like hell yeah so this is written by a woman I assume this is definitely it's got to be it's I believe it's it's like uh yeah but it's it's pretty

good I love that and you know what the funny thing is Is that like I think that's probably a more accurate representation of someone who is sleeping with a lot of people, right? Like I don't know if that's true. I think it is like for it is for us. Yeah, I mean, this is it. Right. I don't know what reality is. Yeah.

Right? Because like we, we've lived such a very specific life and a very specific sort of like code of conduct. But also we surround ourselves with good people. So it's like the people we know who are also having sex with a lot of people are, you know. I'm going to go out on the limb and say there are, you know, shitty fucking hockey bros out there who are garbage people. You know, they are hockey bros in the show. I'm not just coming for hockey people.

Don't worry. But hey, hopefully. I want to live in the world where that's the case. Yeah. Yeah. Ready for question? Yeah. How can I approach my girlfriend about letting me enjoy movies that have explicit content?

This is by Pretty Stretch and it's an 18 year old male, 18 year old female. Buckle in. That's a long one. It's not that long. It's long enough. Me and my girlfriend are coming up on two years. I don't know where I'd be without her. We truly love each other and losing her is the worst thing I could go through at this point in my life. Biggest issue between us revolves around me interacting into other women. She's been cheated on so she values loyalty above anything else in our relationship. This isn't helped by her also not being very happy with her body and mostly being insecure

by having a slimmer petite build compared to other girls. It's the point I wasn't able to watch movies with nudity in them. I recently watched Rush, one of the best bracing movies out there and probably one of my favorite movies. She specifically told me I could only watch a clean version if I could find one or skip over the sex scenes because she found that it shows a few women's bare breasts. I just don't get it. This has always been apparent, but most of our current issues were caused about a month ago when she asked if I watched any porn at any point when we've been dating.

Contacts. We are taking everything sex-related extremely slow, two years and the furthest we've gotten this third base about one time a month ago. I told her in the first few months we were together, I continued viewing it until I felt comfortable using her own pictures in that way. and while I felt better using her pictures compared to porn, I never felt guilty about viewing it. She was disgusted and went to full mental breakdown panic mode for a week. She told me she couldn't view us doing anything sexual the same, and we haven't done anything since.

While I respect her boundaries, I barely mention anything sexual for a month. I miss it. I'm worried she'll get bored and move on. While that won't happen, I truly miss her body. I just don't know what to do. I love her, but I can't live like this. I want to watch Fargo guilt-free knowing girl's butt is shown for four seconds. I need to convince her sex is just everywhere.

I'm truly not happy trying to avoid it for her. Yeah, man, like some of the best things in life have butts and boobs and dicks and stuff in it. Like, you can't find a show that doesn't have it nowadays. Yeah, and like, I know this kind of person. You're going to get in trouble even if you didn't know beforehand. So what are you going to do every time you watch anything, look it up to be like, is there nudity in this? because like that's no way to live. Yeah.

Like unless you're rewatching something, you have no idea what's about to happen. Exactly. But let me tell you, this kind of person, they don't care about that. You're in trouble regardless. That sucks shit. This is a toxic-ass relationship and you need to get it out.

There's a bunch of stuff here, right? Like one, it sucks that she's going through what sounds like pretty severe body dysmorphia or insecurity at the very least. That sucks. That's a hard thing to deal with. That's a hard thing to, to be a partner for because it's no matter how much you say, I love your body, I think you're

attractive. It just doesn't mean anything, right? Like, because it is their issue. And you can do as much as you can to support them. You can do as much as you can to reassure them. But unfortunately, unless she is doing something to combat this, to heal this, there's really not a whole lot else you can do. If she's expecting you to fix this problem, either like, you know, she's aware of it or it's subconscious, by following these sets of rules of not watching porn, not masturbating, not watching anything that ever shows another woman's body ever. Yeah. If she expects this to fix her, then she's in bad shape. It's not going to happen, right? And it's, I've also been with people this insecure when I was younger and you know that, or maybe you don't,

but I'm telling you, it's not going to get better. If you went and you stopped watching all porn and you never watched any show and you, like, again, imagine you do look up every show and you go, oh, there's no new to this, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Then it'll be, oh, that person wore a swimsuit. So that's, you know, oh, that person wore, you know, revealing top. That person is just attractive. You looked at a woman.

You worked with a woman. Like, it's just going to keep getting worse. Like there is no right answer to this because it is not a logical problem. Yeah. And it's, it's always, almost always a self-fulfilling prophecy, right? Of, of things get so intense and so, uh, restricted that eventually someone cracks and leaves or cheats or whatever, right? Like someone, someone breaks one way or the other. And then that person is all like, see, I told you. I knew it was going to happen. And it's like, well, yeah, man. Like you, you, you, you put the, the train tracks down as we were fucking chugging along like a fucking cartoon character. It's like, like, yeah. It's like, yeah. there's only one place this is going to go. You've been pouring oil all over the house and then lighting matches. Eventually, a fire is going to start. Yeah.

Eventually, you're going to drop one. So, look, this is a conversation that's going to be hard for you. And I promise you probably won't go well. But you need to sit down and you need to say, hey, the way that you are sort of restricting what I can and can't watch isn't fair. I understand that you have issues with your body. I understand that you have issues with trust. and cheating, but you must know that me watching a show that has a little bit of nudity in it

is not the same as me going to a bar and cheating on you or sleeping with other women or texting other women sexually explicit things. You must know that there's a difference between those two things. And if she says there isn't, then you might be too far gone, right? Like, I don't know. If she says, yes, you know what? You're right. I'm sorry. I just have these problems. And you say, I understand. But we need to deal with those problems and not layer on. modifiers to our relationship hoping that they go away because that's not going to help right like it's not going to fix problems if you just set up a sort of like landmine field of things that will upset you if they happen yeah putting blinders on me doesn't mean the things don't exist yeah it's

just harder for me to find the landmines at this point in time yeah like if i can only see what's in front of me so it's like you have to really advocate for her process of healing, whether that's encouraging her to get therapy, whether that's encouraging her to be more open about her insecurities and you talking calmly and thoroughly through those to be like, you need to trust me. And if you can't trust me that, you know, if I see boobs on a TV screen for four seconds, I'm not going to lose my fucking mind. Then perhaps she shouldn't be together. It activates you and you're like, got to cheat. Yeah, like just like a Manchurian boobs. Right. Like it's just like, Oh no, my fucking kill protocol has happened.

I've seen three-fourths of a nibble. Yeah. Well, the thing is, men do forget other women exist if you hide bosoms from them long enough. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like, yeah, they're going to see women throughout the movie, but the male brain is simple. So they just think they're men with long hair, right? It's only when an unveiled nipple.

That's why, like, you know, you can get pretty revealing tops in a lot of shows, but they don't show the nipple because then men are still like... Is it? Is it? Is it? Sidney Sweetie so buff. Damn. Sunny Sweetie hitting the gym. Yeah.

It's no way to live. And you got to have this conversation. She's going to lose it. I don't think she's at a point right now where she can make that growth and that change. Maybe I'm doubting her. But I'm going to doubt because she's 18. And it's pretty high up thing right now.

Yeah. So you're probably going to have to either suffer or break up. And I don't think. And the thing is you're going to break up regardless. You're just going to suffer until you get there, right? And things may get worse for both of you. So if you don't have a pretty like damn good conversation about this and move forward, I would say break up. And if you have the conversation, it seems really good.

And then you stumble into the exact same issue 10 days from now, I would say break up. Yeah. It's one of those things where it's like you could have this great conversation. But if, you know, the next time you're watching something, she's in the bathroom peering through the door in the darkness. waiting to catch you. But like, that's in a life to live, man. Like, genuinely, like, I, so my, like, third girlfriend. So when I was, like, about 20, I was dating a girl who was, like, incredibly, actually

fourth, I guess, incredibly jealous, incredibly possessive and insecure. And it, like, started off being like, oh, you know, we were at a party and, like, there was that hot girl. And, like, she talked to you at one point. It's like, well, yeah, what do you expect me to do? like walk away like I'm allowed to talk to people and then it spiral to the point where like if I went to work and women were at work which it was a bar so yeah you know that was an issue and I would have conversation me like you realize this is like not healthy right I need to go to work I need to be able

to go outside and it's like women exist there's nothing I could do about that and you can't then get upset when you come to visit me at work and there's a table with a woman at it you know a one of my co-workers is a what you can't do that you're realize that. We have this conversation. She'd be like, I'm sorry. Like, I know I'm being totally irrational. Like, I trust you. And I'm like, okay, so glad we could get past that. And then like a week later, she'd be like, oh, you're going to work? I'm like, so this and I put up with that for way too long. So I'm telling you to learn from my mistakes and have this conversation and give it one chance. If the conversation goes well, one chance. If it pops up again next week, get out of there.

If it doesn't go well, get out of there. It's not worth it. Yeah. And if this is something, if you've resonate with the question or the woman in this question. Strongly consider therapy. Strongly consider, like, don't expect your partner's behavior to fix your insecurities and the things that you struggle with. Having, like, controlling someone in a rigid scenario is never going to fix the problem. I think it'll exacerbate it, right? Because, like, you're making, one, like, no one's going to be happy being, like, thrown

in a cage, you know what I mean? So, like, impeding something. someone like that, like you almost want to lash out to do to in the opposite direction where you're, you're being held back from. And on top of that, it's like you're just doing what Victorians did with ankles, right? You're making it ever more titillating because it's forbidden, right? He probably was seeing tits. I mean like their tits, but now if it happens as trouble, danger, forbidden tits.

Or also, do you really want to have love your, your partner into like fearing, made, you people, right? Also, do you want to instill fear in general? Like, fuck that. Yeah, like your partner shouldn't be scared to do something as simple as watch a movie or watch a TV show. That is like the most base level thing that anyone can do is to like pop out a TV show. Like it's so like brain zero like a net zero activity. Yeah.

If that is causing anxiety and inducing fear and like, ah, fuck, hope there's no tits in this one or it's another fight tonight. What if your friends are like, hey, you want to come to a movie? And then you're like, do I look it up? And if there's tits, do I have to cancel on my friends? Or do I go and hope against hope that my girlfriend never finds out? Like, fuck that life. What are you doing? So don't be that person.

Don't be that partner because it's just, it is pathetic, you know? And it sucks that comes from a place that we understand. We get insecurity, right? Insecurity is fine. Feeling insecure is very normal. It's what you do with it, right? Yeah, if you make your insecurities, your partner's problem, that's sign number one that you need to go to.

of therapy. This is a quick and easy one, so we'll finish off with it. This is from egg potion. A 17-year-old weird situation, two clueless friends and one girl. So I have two friends. One shall be called Dylan, who does geography A-level. And in the small class, there's another girl he likes. She kind of knows this. Everyone in the class does, but Dylan doesn't know. Dylan kind of dumb. Anyways, this girl breaks up with her boyfriend, and a few weeks later, Dylan asks her out and she kindly rejects him saying that she has a girlfriend. So now she's into girls and so soon. Plus she says it's a secret not to tell anyone RIP secret.

Now fast forward to now. And another friend, Paul, who has told me he has feelings for her, wants to ask her out to prom. I don't think they talk that much. The thing is that telling Paul about Dylan's experience would be kind of breaking trust. but also what if Paul asks her out and it goes bad? I would say don't out this woman, right? Because outing people. RIP secret.

RIP secret, yeah. Outing people is bad. So I wouldn't do that. If she feels comfortable enough to tell Paul, that's great. If she doesn't feel comfortable enough to tell Paul, she'll give him another excuse. It's not going to go bad, bad, right? I assume unless Paul's a fucking psycho,

in which case you got a different problem on your hands, right? Unless Paul famously freaks the hell out. Yeah, that's its whole other. scenario. If it's just a normal person doing a normal thing, like asking somebody out, it's cooler to keep this secret and let them deal with potentially rejecting this person because that's a normal situation, whereas being outed behind your back isn't. Also, you have zero dog in this fight. Yeah. Right. It's not like you're like, oh, I like Paul. I like Dylan. I kind of want to meddle. It's just like Dylan messy out. I want to get involved. Yeah. Like, what are you doing? Like,

You don't need to be fucking. What do you think is going to go bad? That's the thing. It's like unless Paul is famously, as Dan said, Lowell fucking Kyle, he's going to slam a monster energy and punch a hole in the fucking science room floor. You know, who fucking cares?

She will say, hey, sorry, I'm seeing someone. Or yes, maybe they broke up. You know what I mean? It doesn't matter. So preserving that secret, far more important than letting a very normal thing like somebody asks somebody out in high school happen. The thing, what really gets me is that

She breaks up with her boyfriend. A week later, Dylan's like, yo, you want to go out? And she's like, So soon? I've already got a partner. And everyone's like, so soon? But like, if she said yes to Dylan,

she would be in a relationship a week later. Also, the so soon almost feels like she only became gay after breaking up, right? Like she likes women now? So soon, it's like, there's one, being by exists. Two, being gay and dating a man against your better judgment exists. None of those means the gay. Gainess just began. Yeah.

Like, it's, like, you're in high school. Like, you should know, you should understand what bisexual is. Mm-hmm. I don't know if your high school experience, but like, literally almost every girl I went to high school with was bi. So, like. Everyone was making out, but they were never by. You know what I mean?

It was always, like, framed as like it. They did it for the boys, you know? Just girls being by, man. Just girl being by. Uh, but like, yeah, stay out of this. Fuck off. Get out of it. There's no need to interject. And again, if you did interject, you'd be doing a shitty thing because you'd be betraying someone's trust in a way that actually could be harmful, unlike her being asked out. So don't be shit. Yeah. And if you're worried that Paul is, in fact, a lunatic. Yeah. This isn't going to help.

The situation isn't, should I help Paul? It's should you help this poor girl who, like, give her a heads up and be like, hey, I hurt Paul's into you. You might make it, you might need to make it clear that you have. a boyfriend or a partner to get him to back off. He won't ask you out if he thinks you're seeing someone. So maybe just like say you already have a date loudly to prom. And you will avoid a Paul confrontation. Yeah, a Paul confrontation, if you will. A Paul counter.

Yeah. Yeah, don't be in the drama just for the drama, especially when people's real, you know, real shit is involved. Yeah, it don't out anyone ever for any reason. There's no reason to ever out anyone. RIP secret. Unless they've gone missing and you need to be like, she was dating a girl.

And the girl she was dating is Stabby Jane. Yeah. And Stabby Jane lives in Knifesville, where she was visiting last night, wearing very stabble clothes. Yeah. And her dad, kidnapped John. That's been our show, friends.

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And are you ready for some bad sex writing? I am. Do you know who Asman Gold is? Yeah, he's like a, like YouTube streamer or Twitch streamer or something, right? He's a video game guy, yeah.

Yeah, something like that. I believe famously a giant piece of shit. But yeah, no, anytime I've ever seen him, He's, yeah, he sucks. Well, this is a tweet from him. Man are naturally more attractive than women on average. That's why women need makeup.

This isn't me being gay. It's science. Look at a peacock or a cardinal, male versus female. Females get mugged. Greek statues dedicated to the peak aesthetic form overwhelmingly, man. I mean, I don't know what you want me to say to that. I don't know what, like, I guess, but like, if you look at like why men or men or male animals are bright.

It's because in their sort of like ecosystem, women are more powerful. Women hold the power and men have to peacock specifically to be like, look, I'm important. Look at me. Dane, you can't throw logic his way. He's going to cry. Good.

It's not gay. It's science. I just love like, just feeling the need to say that. It's not gay. It's science, okay? And I would, I would argue.

Like when it comes to humans, women are like exponentially more attractive. And I'm not saying this as like a straight man. I'm saying this as like if you get a hundred dudes in a room and a hundred women in a room. And this is like no, no warning, no prep. No, like if you just like snap your fingers and 100 and 100 showed up doing whatever they were doing, I promise you the women are going to be more put together. They're going to look better. They're going to be their hygiene is going to be better.

Because they need to, Dan, because they don't have this. raw sex appeal of a man who's never taken care of himself in his life. You know, a guy who's never moisturized once, maybe hasn't showered all week, he just walks in the room? That turns some heads. Yeah, heads certainly will be turning. This guy's an idiot and I hate him. Yeah. My name's Dave Miller. And we've been your fuck buddies. He's Nile Spain. Cool. That was one of the endings of all time.