Financial Audit - Financial Audit's First Throuple

Episode Date: September 29, 2025

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You know what she wants to do, guys? She discussed it with you. She wants everything to come into one account and then give you two allowances. The one who makes no money handing out allowances. That's not where I was thinking. Yeah, I told you that before. And you guys talked about bringing in a second dick. It would get more affordable.

It would be more than just a penis. You'd be a loved peanut. Is this you guys again? Yes. Wow. Okay, everything is done. I don't have any credit cards open. Do you just want to combine?

So that we have her income? Caleb, do you mind if I take a second? Please. Take a second. Thank you. He's probably going to need time. Well, before he comes back on? He's going to shut down.

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And this is the financial audit. The financial audit. We're here. What the fuck? I have never experienced anything like this before. I'm going to need someone to just tell me what the this is. So this is... Educate me, please.

This is polyamory. At its finest. I do. I did. Yeah, I picked that part up. Yeah. The who's doing what and what's going on? We're doing each other. Yeah.

We're all together. Yeah. Maybe my brain is very binary. Maybe my brain's very binary. I'm trying to figure this out. Is anyone married who's been together? Someone's married. Yes.

Who's married? We are married. You're married. Yes. That's our girlfriend. You don't. So, okay, you're third willing on a permanent basis. No.

It's okay. I know what I am. So very permanently. No, no, no. Nor do you get legal protections if this thing goes sideways? No, the state doesn't recognize or condone any of this. The state doesn't recognize anything ever. But Joey here is a big softie.

And if anything ever went wrong, he would still take care of it. Or he wants double the holes. I don't know. But how long have you guys been married? How long have you guys been together? We've been together about 11 years. Cool. How long have you been in this?

So I met them about six years ago. Were they like looking at you across a bar? Internet-wise, yeah. What was it? A Polly site or something? Oh, it was. Okay, Cupid, right? I think it was okay-Cupid.

Well, plenty of fish, one of those things. It's a hot one for poly couples. Yeah, I've been with them for six years. I've been with them officially for two years. Yeah. But we kind of dated on and off for like six years. How's this dynamic? Because this is a financial audit with a lot of paper to be very clear.

A lot of paper. That's mostly ours. What is the dynamic? I don't think we have one quite yet. That's kind of... Huh? Yeah. That's kind of why we're here.

We want, before anything gets to a point of super serious, we want to get this figured out because we're in this for the long haul. But how? Because not legally. Financially. And she's, she wants to be with us. And we want her to be with us.

So. Well, I'm a pretty open-minded dude. I'm just a little lost. Yeah. This has never been my thing personally. I'd rather be. But have you tried it? Well, no.

Oh, wow. Oh. Oh, she's still going. Oh, now. We're all going. Okay. Wow. Okay. Woo. We got them flustered, guys. Now's our time. Take over. I just must the government approve of everything you do in your life. No, but that's where a lot of legal protections come from.

Yeah. I recognize that. We don't plan on having children together. We're all done having kids. Oh, there are already kids. There is already kids, yes. What's the kids situation? So we have three children and she has one. Oh, you two together? Yes, that's together. Do they live at home?

Yes. What do they think of mommy number two? Do they call her second mommy? Yes, they love her. Now what do they call her? They've got cute nicknames. One of them calls me syrup. Syrup, yes.

Because she's just so sweet. Yes. Syrup is definitely the favorite. So yeah. Yeah. We, yeah, they really do. They adore, adore her. How old are those kids, those three?

16, 9, and 2. And then I have a 13-year-old. And, wait, do you guys all live together? Sure did. How long have you all three live together? About a month. What the fuck? Why is that so new?

Whoa, okay. And the 13-year-old move in? Yes. What is this house? She's been living there. She's been living there about like three months. Yeah. And we're not the only occupants.

And what does the 13 year old think since, you know, they're like obviously there's a, you know, they're together. More officially, you're kind of there. They've known, well, they've known for them as long as I've known them. Like our kids have all kind of grown up together. And the 16 year old really doesn't think it's interesting. The 16-year-old probably loves her more than he lives for being honest. Because she's a gamer, like a big gamer, and so is he.

And so, like, they just connect on that level. And, like, the PC building and stuff like that. Yeah, I guess if you get more and more parents, one of them is bound to like video games. And I do too, but he's just, like, way on that level with her. So, so, yeah. Okay. And again, this is financial audit. I don't really give a fuck what you guys do. Everybody gives a fuck what we do.

No, no. They make it a point to give a fuck what we do. No, I mean, I'm curious. I don't care as in like, do what you want to do. It's fine. Like, I'm not going to, you know, freak out. But this is financial audit. We care about the finances with this.

And this is a very curious situation. And I'm just, I'm really trying to learn the dynamics. So tell me, what are the, how do the finances work in this? collection. Right now poorly. That's what we're really trying to figure. Well, okay. Less of an answer.

I'm more trying to understand how is it currently going on. What is happening? So I'm pretty separate from things at this point. At the moment. Okay. I've always. You clearly. I've always.

Come on. You're a mole on the relationship then. No. If she's separate, if she's not married, if she just moved in. Like you guys are on tier three. She's on tier two. Sure. I'm on a different level.

We're looking to fix that. How do you feel about that? That must not be great. I wouldn't be very confident. I've always been in control of my own finances, so I'm not letting. Yeah, I'm talking about it in the relationship, dude. We want everything. That wouldn't feel very confident in my status of the relationship.

We honestly want everything more integrated. So I. You don't sleep in the same bed? Yes. What size bed? It's a king, but we're looking at big and getting a bigger. Yeah. So we used to have two king beds put together, which was fantastic.

And we're going to do that again, about. eventually, but right now it's just not, it's not on the cards. So it's just very cozy. Very cozy. In a million degrees. Lindsay, are these people real? These people are real. Oh, fuck.

They're cute, too. All right. Well. So, yeah, I like taking care of my woman. I do. And she... What about your man? I take care of him in different ways.

That's... Are you... Have they gone lesbian and they're pushing you out? What's happening? Listen, I've always been a lesbian. It's fine. Do all the work. He's a very pretty lady.

Wait, are you the... All right, all right. Let him talk. Oh, okay. Oh, she's noises constantly. Always, yeah. It's endless. You really think that you're getting one thing

and life comes at you from a different angle. Are you married? No. Well, first off, Mazel Tov. Second of all, when you get there, you think to yourself, like, oh, there's going to be a woman around all the time who cares about it. He loves a bit.

It's just dirty clothes. It's a lot of dirty clothes. There's a lot of reasons why they're not picked up. I have one living with me. Not married, but. How's a clothes situation? Very organized and clean and nice. Put a ring on it.

You'll see the difference. He got with barn animals. We are. We are problems. I wasn't going to say it. Well, somebody had to. So anyways. Yeah, no.

I like. Are you the breadwinner? Yes. Do they work? Yes. I guess I haven't answered that question. Let's go left to right. Alice, what do you do? So I did own a coffee shop.

We had to sell it. We opened. Why? Well, we opened over a year ago. A few months after we opened, my sister passed away. Okay. So then. Why did not open back up when you came back?

So it did open back up when we came back. And then the three weeks after the funeral, I got into a car accident and my car was totaled. Why, what are you doing? I was stopped waiting on a car to turn and a lady rear-ended me going like 60. Kind of like every day here. Sandwich. Yeah. What do you do for a living?

So now I do ghost tours and I am a teacher's aide. Okay. I assume the second one is what makes your income. Actually, no, the ghost stores pays more. Per hour or net? So it's actually per job. Per job or net? Which one do you make more money from?

Net. Net would be the ghost source. Okay. So what hits your account on a monthly basis? Both jobs? Both jobs, about 1,500. I guess this is how to make it in single income households. I don't enough.

Dual income household. Maybe not enough anymore. Not in this economy. Bring in a third. And all of a sudden you got a triple income household. Yeah. I guess it's the way to do it. And we actually have a quadruple income household.

No. What? So my... Are you bringing in a guy? Well, hopefully eventually. To balance it out? That would be great. So if you're looking...

Do you guys actually want to quad it? That would be great. So you weren't good enough. They're moving on. No. It's okay. I get it. No.

No, no, not moving on, moving together. It's about sharing the love. Yeah. It's not one person or another. We love everybody. We love all of them. So if you're looking and you think we're cute. Okay, so what is this quad?

What's the quad? You said there's a fourth income. So the fourth income is actually my parents. They live there. They live there. What is this house? Thing. About 2,000 square feet.

Oh, no. About five acres. insane, huh? About five acres. Well, the acres is okay, but it's not like people are sleeping outside. I've considered it. Yeah. What do your parents think of the...

Oh, they hate it. They're very religious. Yeah. Oh, wow. And they live there with you coming on in. What the crazy part is is they actually love her. They love her individually. Individually.

They like to think of hers a friend. Coping. Coping. Coping. Coping. Yeah. Oh, good. Okay.

Okay. What do you do, Joey? I teach. Cool. What do you make? What, what do you make? What, it's your count in that? About 80.

What, 90? I think it was, I think it went down to 80, didn't it? Give it takeish. Yeah, about 80. No, no, no, a month. What hits? Forty. Are you the one that runs the household?

You definitely seem like the pants. Yeah, I run the household. Yeah, I'm getting that vibe. You're domineering the conversation. The airflow is filled with your noises. I have so many noises. Those aren't even all of my noises. I don't want to hear the rest. Okay, so what hits? About about 44. Good. All right. And I guess this will take about 33% longer because there's 33% more people in this relationship. So I was actually doing housekeeping for a

hospital, but I just recently switched back to nursing assistant. What do you make? It's about 20 an hour. I don't know at this point. Usually it's like 40 hours. I haven't started. What is the account? Well, it's separate still. So you don't know. I don't know yet.

Do before you moved in, what did you guys talk about finances before she moved in? We did. Yeah. So before I was making 25 an hour plus, well, plus differentials. What are we knowledgeable about the financial situation? What are you knowledge about their financial situation before you're lumping on in? I know that they have a lot of debt. Yeah, we went over it.

I don't hide over the debt part of it. I don't hide. You know the number? Not the exact numbers. Okay. What do you guys know about her financial situation? I'm very well aware. What is it? It's a few thousand as far as I'm aware.

I have one for 10,000 and then like a couple of little ones. Little ones, yeah. Of course you're wearing a pineapple shirt. You fucking free. So we actually pick the shirt for him today. I'm sure. Okay. What do you know about either sides of the finances? I can't express enough that I,

I have tried to live my life in a way where I don't have to think about money. And money has come chasing me. My goal has always been to earn as hard as I can, as much as I can. But what if it just goes out the door, then you have to earn more. Yeah, that's really come up on me. And Alice over here takes care of all the numbers or fails to. Is that working? Apparently guys have a ton of debt, according to Ella.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's been a rough couple of years. And so, no, I know almost nothing. So everything, you probably know more about my situation than I do at this point. I don't know anything. Yeah, other than you guys together. I don't know how much is that.

And you still probably know more. Okay, so you don't know what hits your account from this job? Not yet, no. Okay, so it's 20 bucks an hour. No income tax in Arizona, right? Is there? Yeah, there is. Yeah.

Must be relatively low. Yeah, they just readjusted everything to like a flat percentage. I don't remember what it was. Yeah. Okay. All right, times that by 52, assuming some time off, $41,600 a year. I'm going to guess it's about $3,000 a month. That's not about right.

Yeah, that's not about right, yeah. So why are you the one running the household finances when you make dick compared to them? Because he can't do it. He won't do it. So when we first met... Well, why aren't you making anything? What do you mean? You're making nothing.

You're barely... chiviting to the house. Oh, because I take care of the kids and I do all of the other. Stay-at-home mother sometimes? Yep. Sometimes. Yep. Okay.

Is there a button on there for stay-at-home mother? I'm pushing it right now. And that's only equally, and even with you guys three together, making a lot less than a lot of guests on this show at 8,900 hours a month. It's not bad, but that's with three incomes. Mm-hmm. And that's 1006. I mean, 106 is great, especially for dual household income, have no. idea where it fits in terms of a triple household income, but you'd think it'd be a bit

in higher and it's because you're not contributing very much if we're being completely honest. But if you are contributing to take care of the kids, that is considered contributing something for sure, just monetary wise. Yeah, I do a lot of cooking, cleaning. But why aren't the grandparents taking care of the kids that they're living there? So she does when I am working. So work more and have her take care of the kids more. She can't handle it right now.

Her bandwidth is a real stretched. Her bandwidth? After my sister passed away, she kind of lost it. And then we also had her mother pass away very quickly after that. And then after that, we had my nephew pass away. So we had three. She had therapy. Where is she now?

No. No, she's just. How old is she? She's handling it. She's 60. Okay. She's not handling it. No.

So we have. She's not contributing to the house. She is another way. And she. He works. Okay. What's he bringing in? He's pest control.

Is he included in the household income? Like how does this? work. So they pay their own. So they just play a flat rate every month. Okay. Are you bringing in debt into this relationship? Yeah. So how much debt

do we think we have across the board? If you know the finances and if you know the finances, what do you guys think now that we are a combined household? Are we trying to get triple combined finances? In a perfect world, we would like something where like all the bills go into one account and then... They don't view you. sequel.

What? Because you're not doing that. And you said in a perfect world. I asked if we want to and you're not, you didn't even, the answer would have been yes. Well, yeah, I do. But you just said in a perfect world, we do all this. Meaning, meaning what people say after in a perfect world is, but.

No, this isn't me. This isn't me. This is getting her on board. So in a perfect world, I would like all of the bills to go into one account. And then we have a savings account for in case of an emergency. And then I have trouble letting go. I've always been in control my own money. So like letting other people.

And why are you getting into an uncontrolled situation by far? Oh. Not a very secure situation legally nor. I mean, I won't lose anything. Other than housing and relationships and siblings to your. child and... But that can happen in a normal relationship anyway.

It can, but there are legal protections and when divorces happen and there are kids situations. Yeah, but in those legal protections, how many people really stick to them? Like, legitimately. Well, a court would hold them to it

if they don't. Sorry. Sure. Sure they wouldn't? Yeah. Just like my dad paid child support. Sorry. I cope with humor.

Inside joke for you guys that we're all so aware of. But no, like, it's legitimately. The government's not good at doing their job. Well, we all know that. What's the combined debt? If we're combining, what's the combined debt? Are we talking with the house? We can get rid of the house.

Let's keep the house in there. But the house? I would probably say somewhere close to 500. Okay. Okay, that's not where I was thinking. What were you thinking? I was closer to like $300,000. No, because the house is more than that.

Is it? Yeah, I told you that before. Yeah. Nobody listens to me. They just hear me talk and they just like, they zone. It's because you don't do anything other than talk. I know, that's true. It is true.

When that's all you do, yes, people will stop listening. Are you stopping listening? Yes. You seem to be very... 550,000. Oh, she's not even letting me say the number. Okay. I was close.

Okay. I was close. Did you guys hear the number? Could you mind repeating that one again? Yes, there we go. Speak up. Okay. Should I put her in another room so we can have a conversation?

What's happening? I don't know anything, so unfortunately wouldn't be much of a conversation. Uh-huh. $500,9774. Higher than you both thought. That's about where I thought was going to be. Oh, it's $50,000 higher. Why is it, why do you think it's higher than, well, why do you think it's higher, substantially higher than what you thought?

That you're getting into, a whole situation. Didn't think about the house, how much it, well, I know, I know your guys' payments are quite high. Your guys is your guys. See, this doesn't feel like what, you guys are setting this up as a true trio. It isn't. It is a duo. And you're barely involved in an effective. official capacity.

Yeah, we just, we only just moved in about a month ago. And these things kind of matriculate as they do. It's, um, we really haven't had the time. 550,000 hours of debt. You had no idea. What do you think? Oh, that's a lot larger of a number than I was hoping for. Um, I, I suppose I, yeah, uh, um, sorry.

Okay, what the fuck? No, it's that No, not you, her. She's like rubbing your tits. Yeah, well, sorry. He's not doing great. Money gives me anxiety. Really?

Yeah. Big anxiety, it seems. That's scary. The other day she was trying to tell me about money that I had earned, and just hearing that I had earned money was giving me audited and that's, I, is this why she wants to implement her method? Yes. Her al's method?

Yeah. You know what she wants to do, guys? Has she discussed it with you? She discussed it with the producer. She wants everything to come into one account and then give you two allowances. Yeah. That's a little weird. The one who makes no money handing out allowances.

You're very controlling and domineering. I'm domineering, yes. Controlling not so much. Guys, is she controlling? I'm not allowed to say that she is. No, domineering, absolutely. I do that mostly for his sake. because he doesn't want anything to do with it.

Like, he just doesn't. And for a new girl, we're still working on it. And like, I'm willing to, like, work around it. How do you feel about that? You've been independent your whole life now. She wants to give you an allowance. Oh, yeah, that's hard. I do like contributing based on percentages.

Like, I make this much. Here's how much I can put forward, which I kind of, like, threw out there a little bit. Thoughts on that, Alice. I know that Joey's going to make more until we're done with school. School? Yes. School.

Whose were? The kids? Are you guys? No. Us too. Both of you are in school. We are both applied for school. For what school?

Pima. Radiology department. Both of you want to do that. Correct. I've been on, I've been waitlisted for like five years at the other school. Just switched. Oh, that's wonderful. Yeah.

Okay. Listen, I mean, you guys bring in an average like 9,000 bucks a month. What do you think the house? told last month an example went out. What was spent? And this does include interest accruing and things, but what was spent? Oh, I have to say probably

four or five thousand. Okay. What would you think? It's got to be more than that. Yeah, you think more than that? It's got to be more than that. More than that? Yeah, you guys used still use the credit card. Oh, yeah, no. I haven't used the credit card.

Oh, well, see about that. I use, I use, there's interest accrued on the credit card. There's that. Yeah. Yeah, no, you're right. It's probably closer to six. Yeah, I mean, $17,209.

Going out. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. You bet you. Do you get VA disability? No, sir. Interesting. First in the history of financial audit.

Okay. That certainly would have helped the numbers a bit. So what are we trying to do? What are we trying to accomplish? Because I'll help anyone try to accomplish whatever their financial mission is. What are we talking about? Integrating finances in a better, healthier way. We want to get out of this debt.

I want, I know for myself, I want us to be on a healthy footing, especially financially. Yeah. And since I brought the debt in from outside, you know, previous life experiences, I don't want to bring it in and have them pay for it. I'd rather cover it myself and then any of debt. I mean, hopefully no more debt. So we're still viewing it. There's in mind. There's in mind.

I have already told her that I am so willing. We are so willing to help cover anything if we get there before she does. Are you both by? Yes. Okay. That helps. Okay. I'm going to go three, two, one go.

Oh, I'm going to go three, two, one points. On points, I want you all at the exact same time to give me what you think your household financial score is, zero to 10. Zero being the absolute worst, 10 being the absolute best, okay? Three, two, one, two. Zero. Okay, zero one, two.

Gotcha. Ladies and gentlemen, if you want your financial score, take the assessment for free at Calebhammer.com. See where you're standing in the world of finances. See where you need to improve. See where you're doing well. And don't forget, my favorite budgeting app is the dollar-wise budgeting app. Make sure you download it if you don't want to be like,

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Okay. You can learn more about that at dollarwise.com. Let's jump into this. So you're just going to have to tell me who's accounts or whose as we go on. Because this is a lot of confusion. Okay. Uh, the fuck am I seeing?

Oh, this looks like a mortgage. This one's chunky. And this is $3,000 without yoring. Hold on. Okay, $3,100. $17. To find that by what was coming in when it was just you to until this last month. What was that?

$6,000? I mean, the math is pretty darn close. But yeah, 52% of our household was going to mortgage. That's crazy. And now, okay, we're at $8,900. I mean, now it's still 34% pushing into not the most comfortable area, but, you know, we're within reason, especially if we're looking gross income. Did you only bring her in so we can afford the mortgage?

No, actually. Because it's kind of what it feels like. Actually, it looks like on paper. I don't want that house anymore. I didn't really want it from the beginning. Why the fuck do we have it in a big-ass 6% mortgage on it? It was actually supposed to be 7. They paid it down to 6.

You guys paid it down to 6. No, no. Who paid it down to six? What the f f f is this place? It's chunky. It is a chunky payment. It is in the absolute middle of nothing. Desert surrounded by mountains.

It's not a trailer home, but it kind of looks like a very long one. It's all brick, Mexican brick. But it's very narrow, isn't it? Very narrow, very long. Yes. Oh, man. Mexican brick. I'm glad we got diversity brick. Look, private student loans can make

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you know, old carpet, old kitchen. Believe it. Oh my gosh. So there's what? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine humans living in this house? Yeah. Stand by. Yeah, I think nine.

I think that's right. Yeah, nine. That's fucking insane. This is not a big enough house for that. No. Listen, people need, people desire bigger houses than they need it all the time in this country. You guys, larger house would be, how many beds? Three beds, too beds.

How do we fit nine? What are we doing? We're bunking. People are bunking. There was also a large office space that we turned into a bedroom. Okay, that helps. And mom is getting her, is fixing up her own trailer. Yeah.

Call her mom. Huh? I call her mom. She calls her mom. Does mom accept that? Yeah. She prefers mom. Yeah, she prefers it.

Even though she hates that you guys are author. Mom and grandma are her preferred terms. Yeah. Even though she hates that you guys are a thorough. triple. Yeah, I know. It's a lot. She's fixing up her trailer to live on.

Are we selling it if you don't want it? I mean, what are we trying to do here? The goal is to sell it. And grandma and grandpa understand that as well. But there is a trailer Caseta that they're fixing up on it currently. They're going to live in a trailer on a property that you're not going to own? Well, when it sells, then they'll get whatever, whatever's left over, basically. Huh?

What do you mean what's ever left over? From the sale, like what's owed on the house. Why would they get that? Do they own the house? No. Wait, hold on. Who has the house? Who's this?

Who's the name? They would get paid back on whatever, because they put all the money into the casita on the property. So the casita that's the thing on there. It's another word for like a small property. Like a, so the trailer is like an extra like mother-in-law apartment essentially. So they'd get the money for the trailer? Yeah, basically. Okay.

Once it sold. $437,911. with a minimum monthly payment of $3,100.17. You want to sell. And we want to sell. You want to sell? It looks like I don't have much of a choice now, doesn't it?

Well, I feel like you should be allowed to have, at least to say, is this relationship, like I understand you guys love each other. It feels like the dynamic is not very fair. Does this opinion not matter in this? Well, I would say my opinion doesn't matter against those numbers. does it? Well, you guys can afford the mortgage now with a threesome, and you guys talked about bringing in a second dick,

so it would get more affordable. It would be more than just a penis. You'd be a loved penis. Big idiot. Your opinion on selling the house, which you just moved into? Just based on the numbers that's astronomical, even at...

What is? The minimum monthly? The minimum monthly... Well, where would you guys go? what would you do? This is a lot of people who are trying to house. Like looking at the market and compared to the other houses, this is ridiculous. This is ridiculous.

Oh, looking at the market, it's currently, oh, it's sold? Okay, what's it? Yeah, I mean, you guys would break even after fees and commission, maybe even lose money. So. Yes. So it does have a couple of upgrades. It barely have any equity in it. It has.

What are the upgrades? So it has the, it's going to have the second property on it. And it also is going to have solar. on it. Okay, that doesn't really translate very well. It really doesn't. That does not translate in the cell of a house. And then the back, a lot of people pick up and move. The bathroom is upgraded as well. It's going to be upgraded. Okay. Bathroom and kitchen definitely holds the weight the most.

So you don't even get a ring. You see that? You see how they're both wearing one? You don't, you see what's happening? Okay. But I think, well, actually, especially if you renovate the kitchen and it doesn't move the needle very much, you guys are going. going to lose money based on what you put in and walk away from. Then you got to pay the parents based on what they put in. What did the parents put in so far? So far, I think it's somewhere around 10. So you have to pay them 10 off of this.

So then, yeah, I mean, you guys are going to, where are you coming up with the extra 20,000 hours that you're likely just going to have to pay out of pocket? If you sell this house, you guys can't sell this house. You're in a position. Where's the selling this house? Guy doesn't even want to sell the house. So you got lucky that the numbers don't make sense to sell the house. Well, you know, thank God for miracles like this, huh?

Yeah, I'd say so. Wow, this really is absolutely, whoa, there is no, oh my gosh, there is nothing nearby. The closest thing is just the country of Mexico, but it's still nothing there. Oh my gosh, you guys are, how the fuck do you guys even have jobs? That's crazy. What are our commutes? This is crazy. How are you upgrading the kitchen?

Because you guys have no money, or bathroom, because you guys have no money. There's this debt stacked upon debt. How are we possibly doing that? So my mom is actually doing it. So is that included in the 10 or is that going to be additional? Okay. So again, that's still like $20,000. You're going to have to come out.

Like you're going to have to do probably 6% for, you know, realtor commission on both ends, you know, 3% each. Now it can be less and now it can be paid by this buyer, but we're in a buyer's market. So good luck with that. is going to be paid by you. And that's if you even get it for what Zillow is estimating than that. And usually they're pretty nice of other values.

Okay. We have not listed. When were we attempting to list? I don't know if this was ever actually gone through more than, you know. Where do you guys want to go? Cheaper. What can you get that fits as many people that's cheaper? Same area cheaper.

So my mom actually, they have a piece of property. Aren't they on that? That's where they want to build. But they've already built on yours. Yeah. Everything kind of. Everything. Yeah.

Yeah. Absolutely. So it went haywire. It makes sense. Yeah. What with the deaths? With everything. Yeah.

Okay. I think it was pretty much when you guys moved to New York. Why did you even get this house if we didn't want it? So the property wasn't supposed to be for them. The property was supposed to be for my nephew. So. The one you bought? The one that they bought.

I don't give a fuck about that one. Why did you guys buy this when you didn't want to? Well, that's why they didn't move onto that property. I don't give a fuck about that. Why'd you buy this house when you did not want to? Because he wanted this house. He wanted this house. Yeah.

Okay. So we did want this house. Huh? I asked to back out of the house. And he said, no. Oh, you'll least put your foot down in something. Yeah, well, look at what good it's done us. Well, you're more just locked in for a little bit.

I mean, again, with the triple income, you do. It's in the gray zone. That's good news. I'll take the winds where we can get them. Before this, and I'm not trying to point to any elbows, but her mother has a habit of buying horrible rundown property, fixing it about halfway up, and then things are sideways for one.

reason or another, and this has been a feature. It's not a bug. It's a feature. And so we were living in one of those after trying to come back from New Hampshire. And that one was... You guys own a New Hampshire? We did own a New Hampshire. We did.

That was also a good loss. That was a loss. Yep. So... No offense. Why New Hampshire to the literal middle of nothing? Well, so around that time, my job was experiencing a lot of cuts, like a lot of cuts.

And COVID was just heating up. And I'm an insane libertarian. And New Hampshire is the libertarian capital of America. So I was like, I'm going to be out of a job pretty soon as what I assumed. And I realized that I had just enough gas in the tanks to get us to wherever we were going to crash land. I was all that was left. Which is New Hampshire? Yes.

So you went from Arizona to New Hampshire. That's right. And so I went and bought a place out there, kept the job, and I kept working. And the idea was to keep doing that until I'm not quitting. They're going to cut me, right? And so now I was juggling two payments for a little bit. I moved Alice out there. I didn't lose my job.

I got a promotion, actually. Oh, well, that's good. That was a surprise that I wasn't ready for. Sometimes there's good surprises. Sometimes it's confusing ones. And I was not supposed to get pregnant without medical intervention. And then I ended up pregnant. It always finds a way, just like you need to find a way to that microphone.

Yeah, so I ended up pregnant. And there was no medical help within an hour drive from where. You were in the middle of nowhere in New Hampshire as well. So not really. We weren't that far from like Concord. But the issue is so many people had moved in. Are you close to medical now? Yes.

Where? There's a hospital either way about a couple hours? Half hour. What? Yeah. Surprising. Okay. So you moved back from medical.

We had to move back from medical and it ended up being a high-risk pregnancy. So I had to move back. There was no option. Okay. I'm okay with that. It didn't have to be a permanent move, but okay, looks like it has resulted in... When we move, are we trying to go back to New Hampshire or stay in Arizona?

No, my job's here. You like Arizona? Yeah. I don't. Well, no, of course not. And she doesn't. Well, no, of course not. It's just a hot desert in the middle of the...

I mean, if you guys were in at least, like, Phoenix, where you could do things, it would be nice. Or, like, you know, Flagstaff. Yeah. It's pretty, but. Yeah. Flex, I was just. Gorgeous.

I would be happy. If we lived there, I'd be happy. Sure. Instead, you live on a cactus. Yeah, basically. Okay. A hot, hot cactus. So, yeah.

Okay. Well, mortgage only okay because she came in. Right now. She didn't. It would be f***ed. It's pretty fucked. Yeah. And whose name is the mortgage under?

Joey's in mine. Okay. Platinum plus Platinum plus of what we owe 38,172 dollars to 21 cents Who's what, when we're What? What the fuck?

Who's both of you? You're in it together. All of our accounts are joints. I'm gonna call you guys. Okay. Well, this is insane. Yeah. You're over the limit.

Did you know you're over the limit? I'm not trying to have you have more anxiety, but what the fuck? We know. We know. You know, do you know? I didn't know. He didn't know.

Why are you saying we know? He doesn't know any of it. I should say that. Well, then why would you say we? That's not fair. Don't speak for him. He doesn't know what's going on. And the dude struggles with this shit.

Yeah, that's why I don't tell him. And technically he does know. Why would you say we? Stop speaking for him. He does know because he's gotten phone calls. Oh, come on. He does know. You might not know what a town.

Might not know. Okay, what's going on with this card? They're willing to settle on that one. They're willing to settle for why. For half. Okay. So 38,000, yeah, half up front? Probably.

There's no way you could afford half. In what world? 38,172. So it looks like we're stuck with this. I don't even know what the normal minimum fee. You paid it was $1,000. That's the normal? You paid $200 last time.

Thoughts on that? You paid 20% of the minimum payment. Which one is that one? The 30? 38,000? Yeah, 38,000. Yeah, that one's a, right now it was 200. It went up. And it's now.

Did it just three periods end or something? So when? Oh, no. Hey, pause. What do you think your past do? Oh, shit. What do you think is their past do? I have no idea.

You don't know. You're getting into this. Dude, you're flying into a fucking hurricane right now. You have no idea. This is insane. This is insane. Yeah, I don't know. I couldn't tell you.

What do you think, big guy? Uh. Ladies and gentlemen, a financial audit. This is one of the most exciting moments in this channel's history. You know I've been working on building all these educational tools or budgeting app, all this crazy stuff over this past year, because that is where my passion is. We finally did it, and now we put it all into one program called Dollar Wise Central. You get the premium version of my budgeting app.

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Let's fuck go. Let's rip that band-aid off. How bad is it? $3,154. Past due. Past due. $3,000 past due. Why the possible, guys?

Because that was the only one we couldn't pay. Like, we paid everything else because we didn't have enough money. Why were you then going and doing things? Because we're terrible at this. No. see, the real answer is because we blew our fucking money, not because, oh, we paid the things and we didn't have enough money. Guys, going out to eat, what do we think?

That's high. $1,000? It was $1,000. It was $1,000,000. Going out to eat. And you say you can't make a thousand dollar payment? Yeah. That's your going out to eat last month.

And you say you can't make a thousand dollar minimum monthly payment on a credit card? Because you pay your other bills. Fuck, you. That's a bullshit excuse that is immaturity to its core. Miscellaneous bullshit. This could be video games. This could be anything like that. It's this extra whatever's.

That is $1,630. So now we are up... $1,600. $1,630. So now we are up to bullshit. Minimum bullshit. $2,660. $2,660, minimum on bullshit last month alone.

Now there's more stuff in here. There's unknown shopping of about $1,000. Some might be bullshunds. Some might not be. I don't know. Unknown shopping. Yeah. That's usually like Amazon or Walmart because you can get anything there.

So it could be necessities. Yeah, we do a lot of grocery shopping at Walmart. And we'll go through those and we'll see. Other large purchases, things that didn't really fit in the category, but were huge. That was $4,000. $4,000. That wasn't housing. That wasn't vehicles.

That wasn't transportation. That wasn't groceries. It was, I'll tell you. In a month. In a month. That was last month. In fact, that's what's going on. When you just let control go away, then anxiety,

will build and it will hit you like a bomb. Yeah. No, yeah, it sure is. What the fuck goes on? What the fuck goes on? Do you need a moment? No, I'm at work all day. I was doing school all night.

I had the fucking GI bill where they pay me to go to school. It's a second job. It's a second job. The school's not helping me. There's no aspect of my life that's better for this. I'm deployed to my fucking life. I wouldn't, I couldn't go and walk through the house to go to the bathroom.

I'd piss outside, so I didn't have to walk past my kids because I knew they would take too long to see them and say hi. I, I'm a ghost in my own reality to try and earn as much money as I can. What were those fucking numbers? Is this for just us or all three of us?

All three combined. Okay, that's all three of us. But all the debt is combined as well. Okay. Because if you say your ultimate goal is to combine, that's how we went off of it. Yeah, that's fine. That's the ultimate goal. He asked a good question that I would like to hear your perspective.

What the fuck is going on? Well, honestly, I... Valid from him. To be fair, I had a very strict budget for a very long time. I have an Excel spreadsheet. And these last two years since... Honestly, since getting pregnant, I couldn't handle life anymore. more. Couldn't do it. And I reached out for help, but he also couldn't do it. And we have been

kind of drowning since. It was two mortgages. And then it was a business. And then it was a funeral. And then it's just been one thing. Buddy. This is Cope talk. It is. He said what the fuck is going on. We went over minimum $2,660 a bullshit minimum minimum. Minimum. That's what he's asking about. It's just been bullshit ever since. That's what he's been asking about. Not your past mortgage, double mortgage, your past, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Last month alone was $2,660 a bullshit moment. It's likely closer to like 3,000 to 4,000.

Okay, because that's what we usually see. So what the f is going on? If you're the one managing finances, why is it such a disaster? Why is it gone? Why is it obliterated? Why is a guy out there working his ass off? Beating pavement for the money to just go completely out the door and he doesn't know. And all of a sudden he has a panic attack because you.

You just endlessly abuse your situation, your situation where you get to control the entire thing. Give me a little bit of insight here. Not that no self-reflection. To be fair, I honestly don't know. No self-reflection. What's your thoughts on this? Look what's going on over here. What's happening?

I think that they're both at what's end. One with family life and the other with work life, which I've been saying for some time now. What's your solution to that? Joey's not in school. so he doesn't have as much stress on his plate now. I'm hoping that having him involved more with the kids will help mom feel a little better. I also think that mom just needs to go back to work.

I do need to go back. Well, I am back at work now. Well, what about the school thing that you guys just got into? So, waiting on an interview, and if I get that interview, it starts October 2026. And we can't work. And I'm doing work. I'm doing work in school.

I've done it before. Yeah, you have to. I've done before I'll do it again. But also with the eating out, I know a large portion of that is probably on Ella's plate. I think I have like, like, probably 300. It likes to eat out. 300 would be about her portion of her splitting in thirds, by the way.

But either way, either way, if we're trying to combine, this is what combined looks like. If that is our ultimate objective, this is what combined looks like. And when I'm doing all of the stuff out with the kids, everything's expensive. and so when they want something, things have been stressful at home, and I cave. I do. I cave when it comes to the kids.

When they want to go and have McDonald's, I do it. While you're making their future harder. I am. And I understand that. How are you going to, Joey? I knew this was going to be rough. This is shocking.

You said this place was steps from the water. We just haven't found the steps. Not yet. How much did we save? Enough. Enough to get lost. Or you could book a stay with Hilton. Welcome to your ocean front room.

Just steps from the water. The Hilton sale is on now. Book on Hilton.com or the Hilton app and save up to 20% to get the stay you expected. When you want savings, not surprises. It matters where you stay. Hilton, for the stay. I'm sorry. It's okay.

Listen, buddy, a little bit of tough love here. No, I... You're... Sanctal libertarians, so let me give you some Ron Swanson. Okay? Thank you. This is all your choice. This is all personal responsibility.

If you choose not to be involved, then it goes off the cliff. You got a bitter responsibility in there. And unfortunately, the only way to take care of your fiscal responsibility is to be involved and get in there. You got to cut. You got to cut that government spending in your budget. This is blow. this is pig, this is pork.

You got pork bloat going on here, buddy. And you're not collecting enough tax revenue because you got to, she's getting tax subsidized right now. Okay, that's what's going on. You know, I knew that there was a lot of interest. I knew there was a lot of stuff that got run up. But there's a lot that's going on here that doesn't make sense. There's a lot of numbers here.

I do know that a lot of the stuff that is like Walmart and all of that is going to be a lot of food. We have a huge, and I know this is a problem. We have a huge grocery budget with feeding a lot of people. It wasn't that crazy. But even are your parents, what's your parents contributing? You set a flat rate. What is it? A thousand dollars.

That helps. Highly doubt enough. We buy most of the groceries. And so I do know when you see those Walmart charges, that's groceries. It's going to be mostly groceries, kids clothes, that sort of thing. But we probably are spending, I know every time I go to the grocery store, I'm spending somewhere between $2 and $400. And I go twice a week. May I chime in on this?

The pallet is also... Do you have to ask permission in your house? I just didn't interrupt. She doesn't like interrupting. Um, the food that that is eaten in the house is a bit. It could be on the cheaper side. It is on the, it's on the bougie side. It is on the bougie side.

I'm used to eating a lot cheaper. Should you're 300 behind on a credit card? Why do we get to get the bougie groceries? Excuse me, to correct 3,000 behind on a credit card. Yeah. On the first, we've looked at one credit card. One credit card. 3,000.

I'm not saying that's going to like cure everything, but I know little things. And I know that I'm a problem too. I get fast food. I'm just as bad. But I do know that like some of the food it's like. Yeah, we do. You don't have to get like certain things. You could have a couple like, it could be a big struggle meal and it, you know,

and still be good and maybe not delicious, but good enough. We are giant foodies. And I know it's a problem. I do know it is a problem. I'm just saying look at what we are doing when we're behind on credit cards. You say, oh, I made all my payments on everything else. so that's why I can't make this $1,660 at a minimum, minimum, minimum on bullshit. You could have almost made the entire back payment.

And within two months, just by not having that bullshit, you would have. Okay. All right, what am I looking at here? I have no, it's a principal balance of 16,586,0.25 cents. And an interest rate of 10%. What am I looking at? That is the loan we got. A personal loan?

Yes. Okay, who's? Ours. You're on it together. Yes, that was from New Hampshire. What the fuck, New Hampshire? What do you mean personal loan for New Hampshire? It was to fix up the house that we got in New Hampshire, but then we ended up having...

What did you buy the house for? The price? I actually don't really. I think it was 140. 140? I think so. What did you sell it for? 135.

So that loan ended up actually... Right. And you're going to do that again. You said her mom has the track record of going in and just getting properties she can't afford fucking around and then selling it for like a loss? I think that's your guys the track record too. It's starting to feel that way, isn't it? Mm-hmm.

Our other two houses we sold then at a very nice profit. Two for four. Yeah. It's not a good batting record. Okay, so this is a person alone on a house that's long gone, essentially. Eventually. Yes. That's insane.

Already just hearing this conversation, Alice, so far, are you not nervous to get involved on this on a deeper level? Because, oh, my, fuck I would be. I did hear a little bit about this. Look what we've heard so far. I recommended the show to them. Really? Yeah, because I was like, I know that they have some issues.

And I started kind of watching the show. And I was like, oh, it's kind of getting back on track with my financial stuff. And I think that they really needed the help. Yeah. And I was gung-ho about it. Like when she told me about it, we immediately signed up. And I know you almost didn't come on the show. No, I, if I see an advertisement for a bank on my phone, I scroll very quickly past it.

I sympathize. I've got really bad ajida. Have you ever talked to someone about this, a therapist, about this phobia? No, no. Because you're a libertarian doesn't mean you have to disagree with therapy. Yeah, we've had this conversation. I'm a libertarian and a pain in the ass. Who knew?

They usually go hand in hand, yeah. Your brain's a brain, dude. There's people who study it. There's some enablement therapists out there. There's some TikTok bullshit. There's some people that will actually help. There's some good people. You got to shop around and I don't think you probably have an extensive selection area.

You might have to go virtual. But there are actual therapists that focus on a specific phobia. like you have. I have one that focuses on mine. And I did a, again, I told you about how I conquered it this weekend. That's crazy. Never thought I would. You can do that. And it can be a whole other life on the other side. I mean, once he's informed, like it's the unknowing that's even more scary. I mean, yeah, it's stressful to know, but at least you have a goal and a way to progress when you don't know. It's like, well, I'm crushed, but I don't know how crushed. And like, I got us out of that the first time, but it wasn't so hard.

The first time, you've gotten out of debt before. So when I'm... When? When I met him, he also had... What was that? A? Is that what you said? 11 years. 11?

Who's the 16-year-old? Was that from him? No, so it's my sister's child. Oh, okay. Sure. Why not? Yeah, that makes sense. Okay.

So you got out of debt when you guys first met 11 years ago. Tell me about that. So he didn't want me. dealing with the finances. He was very much so I can do it myself, but then we were getting a lot of red slips in the mail. And it finally came to a point where I'm like, this isn't going to work. Like, you need to pay your bills. And so I found all of the bills, gathered them up. And it wasn't much, but then, yeah, we... Then how did we not learn from our behavior there and not want to approach that same situation again?

Because now we're there again. Yeah. But work. probably. It's way worse. This is this has never happened to us before. And over the six years, like, they were doing so good money. They were, they were making good money. So they got into a certain type of lifestyle and I think they haven't adjusted. We did. Oh, fuck yeah. It will. Yeah, it will. So 16,586,0.25 cents on a personal loan for a house we lost money on. Didn't. Okay. Okay. 353.89 is your minimum monthly payment with an interest rate of 10%. Yeah, not beating the market with that one. if you're investing overall in the general stock market.

Fuck shit. Listen, I mean, I'll immediately, I'll get you guys a course career certification. If you don't get into the, you know, you all can have one. But primarily for you, if you don't get into the school, try to get something there and get yourself a better job. Like that has increased people's incomes and got them into new career field substantially. If this doesn't work, my backup is phlebotomy. Okay.

We'll get you guys the fifth card as well. It's a debit card that builds credit. So no more credit cards because look what you did with the first one. The plan is insane. I want them gone. Okay, now I'm looking at a visa signature. Yes. Whose is this?

You guys are on together. Yeah, all of us are together. Feel very included? Maybe eventually. You ever get points fatigue? Way too much confusion. Which card should I be using to maximize? points. What are those points actually worth? A free airline peanut? Great. Today we've partnered with

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No. When the debts cleared up, no. 7,203.35. Minimum monthly payment of $226. It's pretty close to maxed out. You made your minimum monthly payment. Can someone pull up this card on their phone? Maybe.

Because, again, you're not sending statements here. You're sending a screenshot of a website. Yeah. This is for a cash rewards visa signature. I need to see if there's any purchases. I need to see what's going on. When you paid this off, you took out a 401k loan to pay this off. So it wasn't even discipline.

Right? Right. I did know about that one. Oh, for fuck sake. Guys, how much did we pull from who's 401K? Was 401K? it is. Oh, we are past doing that one. I gotta pay that. So this is this right here. Is it yours? Of course. Why, why of course to be yours? Well, because you would have contributed

more, I assume. How much did you pull out? How much should we pull out? For Mike. I'm trying, I'm trying to think. Which one was that? That was supposed to be a signature card? Yeah. Why is the minute what they have a double all of a sudden? Oh, no. The past is. I didn't realize that one wasn't on auto pay. Guys, what do we? It's worse. It's worse. So, what is?

Dude, what is. What are we doing? I need you to open it again. Fick's sake. I don't remember. I honestly don't remember. I think we only ever took out the, did we take out,

we took out the 401K loan for the funeral, but I think the only other one we took out before that was at the $10,000? Twice? You took out twice? Yeah. I can pay that now. Well, the second one was to pay for a funeral. Which, again, that's an emergency.

I can kind of, but you've done it twice. We're just not learning behavior. Nope. We're not learning for behavior. And now we're past due on our second card. And my team didn't even know that. Yeah. I didn't even have that.

This is worse than even they thought. And they knew this was completely fucking they reviewed. I'm sorry. Yeah. Caleb, do you mind if I take a second? Please. Take a second. Thank you.

I do want you to be informed about the full situation, though, still. I know it's hard. It's time to refresh your yard during spring backyard days at the Home Depot. Get low prices guaranteed on propane grills starting at $179, like the next grill three-burner gas grill. Or get $50 off a select Weber Spirit grill and bring big flavor to your backyard. Then set the scene with Hampton Bay string lights that bring it all together. Shop Spring backyard days for seven days at the Home Depot. Now through May 6th.

Exclusion supplies to homebent.com slash price match for details. I got a call dividend and have them put that back in there. Buddy, just open up. I need to see this card. That was the card. I need to see it. All I saw is that you had a double payment because you walked. Oh, okay.

Sorry. How's a guy doing? Not great. I knew this was going to be really, really tough because he doesn't know anything. What do you like more? Does it work like that? No, no. I mean,

Joey and I started dating first. And then Ariel. And you weren't jealous when they were dating. Um, there was issues, but it wasn't. Initially, yeah. Initially.

But it was more of, we actually started dating together first, the very first time. Um, and I had brought up concerns. I had brought up concerns that, uh, this isn't the, What, rewards?

I don't care about rewards. Where are you? I don't know. Dude, just get me to the fucking credit card. That she wasn't really into women. And so when... That's complicated. Yeah.

And Joey kept saying, no, it's fine. And then it turned out now she really didn't think she was at the time. Wasn't sure. I wasn't sure. So then we were, you know, on a break for a while. And then we had a lot of discussion. when we finally did get back together, and things have been like way better, like way better.

Sakes, such a mess. I'm glad there's a least no purchases on there this last one. No. Can't. I mean, they're behind. They're behind. What do you think we should do for him? So you just need, like, a few minutes?

Yeah, he probably needs a minute. He's probably getting more water. He's probably going to need some time. He's probably going to need time, like a lot. Well, before he comes back on? He's very angry, and he's going to hold the, lot of anger specifically at me. How does that look?

How does that usually, what usually happens then? He's going to shut down. He's going to completely shut down. Why do you? No, I mean, you're behind on everything. Look what your choices have done. You f*** this. Yeah.

It's not fair. It's not. And it's, I listen, starting down, it's not the most productive way to deal with things. But yeah, he deserves to be upset. And he can be. but he was also asked on multiple occasions to be involved in the finances, and he opted not to. So here we are.

And that's why we're here. We need a Joey replacement. You need a Joe replacement. You're looking for a fourth. I have an applicant. And he's cute. Hi. Oh.

How do you feel about Arizona? Ladies, I'm from Arizona. There we go. Oh, and he smells nice, too. I'm digging this. Enjoy. Joey 2.0. I need the rest of the day off, boss.

Yeah, by the way, when I told him to come on, he was doing this heavily in the back. Allegedly. Never. Joey would not. If I know Joey like I know Joey. So, Joe, you're pretty upset. Because this is kind of fucked. It's bad.

It's bad. From hearing it from over there. It's pretty bad. Yeah, she's behind on two payments. So far. Yeah. Big guy, your money that you go earn. Yamava Resort and Casino at San Manuel

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celebrating its 40th anniversary. You win? Must be 21 to enter. Yeah. I'm a... Sorry. You said it? Yeah, your tone's not very apologetic, I'll be honest.

No. I'm a bit. That's what you want. She's very happy about it. It's a very strange coping mechanism. It is. I cope with comedy. Why the f*** you want to be involved in this?

That's comedy? Oh, yeah. Wow, okay. Being broke is comedy. Get her on Kill Tony. I think it's a good, like I said, I think it was a good wake-up call for both of them, for Joey to know the situation and for Alice to know where, you know, where, you know, the spending is going.

Really? Yeah. No, fully where everything's going. Is it a wake-up call to you? About what the fuck you're getting into? Specifics, yes. I did know that it was already pretty bad. I was aware it was quite bad.

Yeah, but the debt, you guess, was $200,000 under the reality of the debt. Yeah. Okay, I mean, I have this prime visa, but I don't have like a bail. Again, you guys aren't giving Stevens. Someone pull up the Chase Prime Visa. Is that you and Joey? Yeah. I don't know if I can get that.

How's that one look, Joey? We're going to take the data from the past two, probably, New Jersey accent, please. Yeah. But taking the data from the past two, probably fift. That's good. Who sleeps in the middle? Alice.

That sucks. I actually like it. Really? It's so warm. Yeah, it's so cozy. Yeah, I need the edge. I'm a rotisserie chicken at night. I feel like someone's getting edged the whole time, that's for sure.

You could have had a statement in about 15 seconds. This would have been so easy. Okay, here we go. We owe $3,863. $1.86. Wonderful. First time hearing this big guy, huh? With a minimum monthly payment of $1.16. Should we check on him?

Yeah, you want to just see how he's doing? Oh. Oh, he's in his one. He's here. Yeah, we don't want him going to get, we don't want him to get jealous. He's going to be jealous. No, he doesn't. He doesn't really get jealous.

In fact, he might just want your hole. Big guy. Welcome back. The seat will be a little warm. Yeah. We had someone sitting down. Did it help? Take it a lap?

Yeah. A little fresh air goes a long way. Yeah. Sorry, let me get that. Well, we just unlocked a credit card of $3,863.86 to bring you back down. Thank you. You're welcome. You're welcome.

We're purchasing on a credit card that will not be paid off. Minimum monthly payment without any purchases alone, this is your least, this is your smallest balance so far. Yeah. What do we think, how long do we think it takes the payoff without purchasing? Of which, by the way, we are purchasing. Probably like 10 years. Okay. I was just going to assume 10, yeah.

Yeah, 15. 15. And this is our smallest balance. Smallest balance. Yeah. You're going to be like mid-50s. Oh, that's great. And then that one will be paid off.

That one will be paid off. Well, if we don't purchase, but all we do is purchase. In fact, what did the purchase look like? I will tell you. Who's purchasing? Amazon, Amazon, grubhubbing waterburger. Family dollar, Valley Sleep Center. That was for my neurological.

USAA. Yes. Is this you guys again? Yes. Wow. Okay. Everything is done. I don't have any credit cards open.

Why are we bringing in, why would you want to come into this? Like, I understand, okay, you love them. Why would you want to come into this the way the account combined? Do you just want to combine so that we have for income? No. Because you guys are together. You too.

I don't know how you would survive. There's no malicious intent here. None whatsoever. You don't, okay. USAA, we have a credit card balance of $3,907. It's at a 20.15% interest rate.

What was that interest rate? 20.15. Thank you. And they're all going to be around 30. by the way. So this one's actually even better than the others. With a limit of 4,400, so we're not that far from the limit by any means. We're going and we're stopping in. We're getting some bullshit. We're stopping in. We're getting some bullshit.

Paris bag gap. Canteen vending machine. That's you. On the credit card. So big guy, here is what's going on. You are spending money on a credit card that does not have much more money to spend on the disagreeing interest. So this is where being informed on the facts of your financial.

situation is important because you cannot be going and blowing all this money. Who's stopping in the gas stations and getting just small little things? Because that's not gas purchases. We're not getting $3.65 cents of gas. So what are you getting? Breakfast. Okay. Yeah.

We got to be pack a breakfast or making breakfast. Yeah. Okay. That cool. And if you're going to stay at home, make it. Yeah. Contribute in that way. And I was for a long time.

Like I really, we were. doing overnight oats and stuff like that. The last few years have really, really cut deep. So, and I was just... No. No, so we were just talking last night about getting back to a normal. Lots of breakfast in this. We'll give you guys this and it's butcher-friendly.

I'm actually very excited about that. I saw a cookbook and I'm all about cookbooks. Well, I wish you can actually cooked. Look, here we go. I mean, this is more, it's more savory, but you can have devil dags in the morning, okay? You love a good double day. She does. Yeah, because you went and stopped in and got breakfast a few times,

and then the vending machine and the Paris baguette for 40 bucks. The Paris baguette was us. That was us. Nice little sweet treat. We did get a little sweet treat. A little sweet treat. Yeah, that was at my neurologist's appointment. Yeah, it was.

And listen, I want to know your perspective on this, Joey. Being a self-confessed libertarian yourself. Yeah. that usually advocates for personal responsibility only. Like there's nothing outside of that. What do you think? What do you think now that you're hearing all this, how that vibes? I was under the impression that I could trust that this was getting taken care of.

And it clearly hasn't been. And I can see that she. Inspects. Don't expect. Hey, maybe let's let him answer. She loves me and she doesn't want to upset me. And I've really done a fine job of putting myself into a situation where I'm sure she feels that I'm unapproachable on this. And the consequences of it are clear.

Do you not feel she controls? I, there are parts of life that you don't care that much about. there's plenty of my life I don't care about. I didn't think this was, I had no idea it was this bad and this stupid. It's one thing to be bad. It's another thing to be stupid. And I'm shocked to find out how much it is both today.

And I realize that if I want out of this, I'm going to have to be part of the solution. And I can't just walk away from it and hope that, other people are going to make my life better. This is... What are you seeing in the dynamic coming into this? A lot of fear from Joey. I know I came in at a very stressful time.

And are you sure they aren't like cope-loving because sometimes people look for extra things when life is hard, you know, they want to shake things up. Are you sure that once life gets... expect the normal that the place for you is there as much as it is today. We've had feelings for each other for years and years. I've been in the position where I'm like, I'm not, I'm not ready.

How did she convince you to enjoy vagina? She's a great talker. Ladies. Department of Education. Who? This is with Nelnet. Yeah, that's mine. Hey, it looks like total of...

Does everyone have student loans or is it just you? I don't have any. Just me. $2169 for what? And of course, you're the one making no money. You know, actually, I need to contact them about that because it switched over. To NellNet from another company from Great Lakes. Great Lakes, yep.

And when I had last checked with Great Lakes, it was only at 12,000. But when it switched over- This was probably interest that accrued while it was all being like no payment required, dude. So when it, the last time I checked with them, it was at 12,000. Then when it switched over, it was at 21 and I was very confused by that. I would not be surprised. It's 21,069. So we're going to go off of that.

I'm sure it sat there in accrued interest when payments required were zero. What's the status of these today? I know we're talking about getting back to school. Deferred. until... Right. Next year. I think November.

No, no. You requested an extra. I requested an extra. Why? You guys make money as a household and tax returns. I'm surprised they've been allowed it. Yeah, those are deferred currently. Well, payment's going to be about, if you want to get it paid in about 10 years,

$250 a month added to your guys' stack. Yeah. Extra $250, gone like that. Yeah. Why haven't you been paying on these? just hasn't been front line. Did you get a degree? Did you get a degree?

So I got a certificate. I wanted to go in for... Certificate in what? Automated computer specialist. Back when that... Middy computer specialist. Automated computer specialist. Okay.

And that was back when that meant something, and now it doesn't. It's now a fancy word for, I can be a secretary. But it did get me a job back when... I not go be a secretary. Make money. Because nobody cares about that. Everybody now wants an associates or bachelor. or bachelors in something.

That's a perfect dream situation. It doesn't mean you shouldn't apply. Oh, I haven't applying. I apply basically anything that makes... Well, I'm sure there's not many opportunities in that area. No offense. Not really. No.

There's not. I have applied at basically everything that comes up. Yeah, I'm sure interest is just accrued. Yeah. They're in zero-dollar phases. Even the upsons, unsubsidized loans, when they're deferred, they might accrue interest. I'm not 100% sure on that.

I don't know your mixture of subsidized or unsubsidized. Never been late, but we're also just not making payments. They've been our deferred since July. Oh, wait. No, that's just leading up to those. Yeah, I think that's in July might have been when it changed over to NellNet. All right. Still going.

Okay, what is E-LAN-C-S credit card? Elon Financial? Uh-huh. That was a personal loan. through. Oh, wait, excuse me. That was a credit card. You?

This is fine in the ears. Yes. That is. It's in collections. She has collections. She's bringing collections into the house. Yeah, we knew about that. Yeah.

Well, I knew about that. Yeah, what's this weed? Did you know she has collections? I don't know. I know nothing. What? What is going on? Come on.

You seem like the same one this conversation so far. So that one, I only have two movements left on it. It's, I have a debt relief for that one. So that's in debt relief. So I have two more and then I'm closed out. So am I going to see the debt relief statement in this. It should be in there, yeah.

Okay, so I don't need to worry about this statement specifically. No, that was on. Why did a credit card going to collections and how long you go? How long? This was, I want to say, 20, 23. What happened? Me and an ex separated, so the financial situation changed, and I couldn't afford everything on my own. So I let that stuff, the stuff that I could go in collections or, well, debt relief, I allowed it to go to debt relief.

Well, I'm sure you're just blowing all your money in your kid, too, just endlessly. trying to cope with the single mom. There is some guilt spending for sure. Yeah, absolutely. And I know you're just blowing money on video games like crazy. That one's not such a big way. And then you're getting, you know, you got a game PC, big arsenal video games. Yeah, not, I haven't, I don't spend too much on myself.

There's a lot of. So just the kid? I do spend some of her. But you're deferring the kid's future. And all of a sudden, you're not going to have a retirement. Who knows if you're going to be with them by retirement's age? Yes. There's a lot of, there's a lot of.

She's even skeptical about that. You see that, guys? There's a lot of concern. What do we think of that? Is that weird to hear? Is that concerning to hear? Caleb, if you were coming in on this, would you stay? I wouldn't come in.

I get it. I wouldn't be coming in and combining my finances and I wouldn't be combining life yet. I'd be coming in and I'd be f***ed. And that would be about it. That's, you know, that's what I'd be doing. I wouldn't want to incorporate my life into this. But she's also bringing baggage. She's bringing collections and debt relief program.

So it's not like she's perfect by any means. Ambition comes in all shapes and sizes. At First Citizens Bank, we roll with your goals because we're built for what you're building. Fit for your ambition for Citizens Bank. Is she handling them? I don't know what Wright looks like. What do I fucking know what Wright looks like? You're looking at things.

Is she doing the right things? She's not doing the right things. Is she doing the right things? Are you doing the right things? You're pointing fingers over here. You're doing the right things? I'm keeping up with payments. So once this is finished, I'm transferring and paying off my small debt.

And then it's like $415 that's going towards that. A month. A month. Yeah. That you final to your next debt. Yes. That is the way. Yeah.

And then once I have that done that 415 will go to, I'm going to start with my smaller ones. I only have a couple of like maybe like three. They're like from two to 600, I think. Okay. Well, we'll find them. What's CFT? What's CFT pay? That is the debt relief.

The debt relief. Yes. Yes, I see it's 4.46 a month. And you said there's two payments left? Yes. That's good. So she's almost out of her. Well, you guys are going deeper.

Mm-hmm. How do we decide who he sticks it in? How do we determine? Do we draw straws? So he... Or do we, like, human centipede? He can stick it wherever he wants... Sure, but like...

As soon as he gets a vasectomy. Well, of course, but like, But if both want, like, how does he choose? How do you choose? You just put it in both, I guess. Oh, yeah, that's, I don't know if that's scientifically possible. Are you talking to technical? Yeah.

Everybody's very busy. We got three of us and we don't even, what's the point at that point? What? Nobody said that. You know, every movie has a director and, you know, some people, some people like being the director. I don't, I don't point any elbows or anything. You are very often the director, sir. Nice try. Like, cut corner?

You know, you just, someone's got a game plan and then you run it. You see where it goes. Sometimes you're in the mood for cake. Sometimes you're in the mood for bails. You know, it just depends. Oh, ma'am. Okay. We're the Hartford, with decades of experience ensuring millions of unique small businesses,

When it comes to your small business insurance Thank you One size absolutely does not fit all Get a quote or find an agent today at thehartford.com slash small business Oh, that's a lot of buttons. No, because she's not in like the worst. Her balance on this is $892.26

and the minimum fee payment is $4.46, which means this is paid off in two. But again, we're combining it like it's confined if our entire intent is to be combined. Right. Say, guys, why, why screenshots from web pages? This is so difficult. Yeah, I couldn't get a print off.

This is, it's just more information. Yeah, it's just more information on it. Hey, what about the same thing? Yeah. Money owed to friend. To whose friend? Mine. You owe your friend money.

She owes her friend money. Yes. Did we know this? I did. Okay. What do you owe your friend $5,000 for? Car. What?

Yeah. What do you did they get the car and they paid for it for you or you got it from them and you owe them? Uh, yeah. So, um, it basically purchasing off them. What is the car? Uh, hmm, a Nissan versus a note. Is this a loan or is it just paid to them? Uh, it's a loan.

It's a loan from a bank. Yes. Oh, no, no, no. What's the interest rate on it? Ooh, I don't remember. Because I just, why weren't you able to access it? Because I just have this written on a piece of paper. All, all.

sides of y'all are disorganized. What's the minimum fee payment on this? Um, 150. Okay. Until I basically sip up enough to pay it off and then get it switched over. Oh, and we don't know the interest. Okay. Me, when'd you do this? 2022, I believe. Oh, okay. So this is around forever. Do we have the value on this car? It's very low. Uh-huh. It's very low. What is like two, three, one? Probably like $1, $1, $1, $1, $1,000. Oh, for the fuck sake, what are we doing? I mean, is this car going to last? No. It's already having issues.

Oh, it is? What are we seeing? Engine leak. Are you handy? Not really. Are you guys handy? The good thing about being broke is that you learn how to get more handy. I've been fixing my car a lot recently.

Yeah. And then I also have pretty handy with cars. Okay. So do we know what's wrong with it? I'm going to probably put a little more effort into looking to it. You'll feel pumped. For sake, how long has this been going? She's been having issues with it for a while.

Since I bought it. Since I bought it. Three years ago? Since I bought it. It was as is. We haven't learned. We haven't figured out what's going on? No.

It was a minor leak. It's not usually an issue. It's been having more issues lately. Dude, this is crazy. And you can get to your job in this. Yes. Yeah. It runs.

What happens when it doesn't? What do you do? The only thing it does is shut off after a certain amount of RPM's. That's it. And then you just turn it back on. Yeah, but what do you do when it doesn't? How do you get to work when it doesn't? She'll have to learn how to drive a truck.

So there's a bonus truck sitting around? My mom has a spare truck. And your mom doesn't go anywhere. Not often. They have a couple of vehicles. Yeah, one off the kids, okay. But the goal is to get it paid off and then trade it in. What you're fucking better.

Yeah, trade it in for 1,500 and then get what? Okay, a firm. Who's the firm? Mine. Okay. What are you doing? Pull up your firm. Well, I see.

It's Walmart. What are we getting on Walmart? So, a firm... Yeah, just pull it up. Was for... Grandin of a purchase or something. This is for the Walmart. So we were doing...

Is it just Walmart? Really bad. and while spending $2,600 minimum on bullshit. Right? Yeah. Right? So we needed groceries. And we did that.

Did he know? Did you even discuss with him? I think I tried to, but it did not go well. Now, when you did that, did he know you guys also blew $2,600 on bullshit when you came and said, we don't have money to get groceries? I guess not. Exactly. Because how would that conversation have gone if she did bring that full information to you, Joey? What would you have said?

I'm completely unprepared for any of this. It's a $26.76 payment. $36.65 is the balance. Now, Joey, something that I think is we're talking about while we're having this conversation is when you walked out, she said that you're probably furious, but what you're going to do is just shut down from that. What do you want to do from here? What do you want to see the productivity look like from here? Because if we just shut down, nothing's going to happen, right?

So, what do you want to see happen from here? I, I work. I work really hard. I do the best that I can. And it looks like it's being squandered. And I'm not going to be able to retire. Look at this. How do I crawl out of this?

I get that. This sucks. But I want to hear what do you want this to look like going forward, the conversation, the finance is how we're managing it. Because, again, she says you're going to be very angry at this, and I think that is very valid. However, she says you're going to shut down, and I think that might be unproductive. So what do you want to do going from this conversation? I'm wondering if maybe I should be the one who's dealing with all this. And maybe Alice ought to be the one who's on a.

stipend. I think that maybe we should all be dealing with this together as a group and not one person is the only one involved. Hi, I listen to your financial audit. I've curated the exact resources and tools I personally use or would use if I was in certain situations. So take advantage of these offers in the resources section in the description below. The first one, I've moved my investments to Weble. Do the same and transfer to my investing app of choice and you get cash bonuses. of $200 all the way up to $30,000 depending on initial funding amounts, and up to 8.1% APY on your money and up to 3.5 matches for your IRA. And then number two, a great new checking account that I've switched over from SOFI

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You know, I might have been more inclined to agree with that if these numbers are suggesting that what we're doing right now isn't working. Right. And what I've been doing is nothing. Right. And I have been asking you to do something with me for a long time. Yeah. And I think it might be best if everybody.

is involved in the finances. I think having a one person that we're aware of, because I, like, I used the budgeting out, the dollar-wise. And I didn't know how much I spent on fast food. You just kind of, like, it's like $10 here, $10 there. And I spend like $300, I believe, on fast food, which is outrageous. That's more than my grocery budget that I set for myself.

Yeah. I think that's something you guys both need to really look at and keep to. And like, even if you have to have like a limited amount, that you can access to for emergencies until you guys kind of get out of this. What do you think of that? It looks like the only way forward is we're going to do this

Javier Miley style. We're going to make big cuts. We're going to tighten the belt in ways that are incredibly uncomfortable. How are you going to approach that? How are you going to be a part of that conversation? I think that, first of all, therapy might not be the worst idea.

This has come up a couple of times. and after this, like, I was so sick seeing all this that I had to leave the room. Like, I couldn't even be near it. And this is my future that we're talking about. You're doing me a big favor right now by trying to help make my life better. And I appreciate that. And right now you're the messenger, and I'm incredibly unhappy with you for the things that you're telling me. You should be.

And I, please don't take any of that personally. but I need to fucking get right. And I'm wondering how much of this should be a collaboration, how much I should just, I don't know. You can sit there and point fingers and say that all of this spending was me,

but we know it's not. It's all of us. Yeah, I'm on there too. You're on here. I'm on here. On here. You also go to the gas station. You also swipe for your energy drinks.

Like, I know you don't do a bunch of it, but we're both really bad about when the kids want something. We get it for them. I get nothing for anyone. I get the tequitos. Let's go ahead and say,

he's got the gas station stuff. He actually gets tequitos, literal tequitos. Yeah, he does. He does get tequitos. Let's go ahead and here. You got the calculator. What's, I don't know, probably four bucks for the tequitos,

four bucks for the monster. Let's go ahead and call. at $8 a day. Let's assume I do it. Let's assume I do. I have a coffee pot in my office. I do a pot of coffee a day. Just under 3,000 bucks a year would be that.

I'm not blaming you either. I'm just saying we are all in this together. No, yeah. You should have been involved. You should have been involved. I should have been involved. But Alice has been. I've been the only one involved.

Yeah. a lot of this debt came from trying to start up the business and it may have however it wouldn't be here today if we weren't blowing all that money on if the bullshit was going to pay it off listen you went into debt for something okay but now it's continuing and we're behind on everything everything yeah this is this is madness do you feel like the numbers are off. Like you were looking at me at the beginning when it was being read off. The, I feel like they, well, because like the, he was, but he had like said like some of that's Walmart and stuff like that. And that makes sense. Like once that got like that makes sense.

That's the unknown category. Yeah. Because that that, that does make sense to me because what's the? We spend so much in groceries. You've seen it. You've been there with me doing groceries. It's insane. What's the health equity? Health equity. It's called health equity. It's called health equity. That's, uh, that's me. That's my medical bill. Uh, I went to the ER. When? Within, well, last year at some point.

To get her pregnant too? No, uh, migraine blood pressure, loss of consciousness, that kind of stuff. Okay. Well, why are you still going to fast food? Um, because I like it. We like having another emergency room visit soon? No. Blood pressure, fast food doesn't go great together. Yep.

It's a fun fact. No. Okay. Yeah, I'm terrible and I love it so much. Believe it or not, even though the fast food looks horrible, I don't actually like eating fast food. It makes me horribly sick. I get fast food because other people like to eat fast food. Well, we're talking about her right now.

My issue is sweet treats, and we both. We are both sweet treats. Okay. We are both we treat vampires. Okay. It's a $40 a month payment. $900 total, I believe. And then to the doctor directly, I think it's $172 or something like that.

So $900 is owed? $900. Okay, $900 is the balance, $40 payment. Yes. You feel like you always got to be the center of attention? I am the center of attention. I guess technically you are. It is your show.

I'll allow it. Do you guys enjoy that? Now you guys love her. It doesn't mean you have to enjoy every quality. The insanity is fun. Joey enjoys nothing right now. Yeah. Which is fair.

I feel like I'm at a funeral. We're definitely at a funeral for how you guys are spending money going forward. I hope so. We're burying McDonald's in the ground. Okay, we continue. Um, USA classic check. Is that the end of debt? Because there's a lot of paperwork still here.

The documents weren't in the order that I wanted them to be, so I'm looking. Well, just go in the order. I mean, it's chaos. You guys didn't send statements. But I'll deal with it. $800 in this USAA classic checking. Who's? Is this your guys?

Are you guys joint? Yes. On that is the main guy, main checking account? No, that's not our main. Our main is the bank of America. What is this? What is the purpose of this? That was his like original checking account.

What are we using for today though? Mostly bills. Okay, but it's not the main checking account? No. Curious. Okay. For bills, guys, here we go. Hot topic vending machine, super sale bin.

Going in the gas station, getting some bullshit. PayPal. Hulu. PayPal, a firm. And a Patreon membership of $15. Listen, Hammer Elite on YouTube, $10 a month is much better I guarantee it. Three premium shows posted every single day

when you click that join button below. Hey, y'all, Netflix, Spotify, Boost membership, PayPal, PayPal, PayPal, Google, Google. What is all this PayPal? MacKoo's Island and other Patreon membership. Great. What's Macu's Island?

Oh, that was the kid thing. Yeah. Okay. Great. Look at all the bullshit that's bills. Those are bills. Those are bills? Yeah, that's what keeps our kids happy.

Yeah, they're not going to really be happy when they're in their mid-40s trying to survive, but they have to put their life on hold to take care of their parents because their parents never sanctifies when they were younger. And all of a sudden, they no longer have retirement and Social Security is substantially less than it is today. Yeah. That's what you're doing to your kids. Trying to set them up for any kind of future? I don't see it.

You're trying to pay for their college? I don't see it. Or you're trying to help them start a business? I don't see it. Are you trying to give them a foot up in this world and give them a generational change? I don't see it. they will be you will be living with them like your parents are living with you and how is that always is that great always no okay but that's what you are doing that is the choice you are making based on the bullshit spending you are doing now

okay three thousand dollars in this bank of america uh food cities that groceries groceries okay well at least that's groceries pest smart but it's like two bucks going in and getting some gas station timo yeah who's teamooing that was me Why are you team-moing? I thought we moved on. I got shoes and clothes for the kids. I think that's another vending machine, some bull-fitting machine, some bullshit. Going in and getting some bullshit.

Sonic, 50 bucks is Sonic. Yeah. Zelling out 200 bucks. Getting some bullshit. Takiera. McDonald's. Break the cycle. McDonald's getting in some

bullshit Get into bullshit Blue window Get into a bullshit Market at work It's a vending machine Boarding goods Benning machine

Papa Johns Starbucks Zelling out money Bulls Bullshit Going in and get into Bullsh Zs selling out

300 Mr. Car Wash You live in the desert I'm okay with it But rare here and there The zeal is between accounts You guys also have a house Fill a bucket of water

Dump it on your car And spray under Okay because that's what we're trying to do to avoid getting the sand to everything. Venet machine. Oh, fuck. Minutime machine. How tea.

Venet machine. McDonald's. Going in and getting some bullshit. Dairy queen. Cash at about $5. Take care. How do you say it? Takaria.

Bosen donuts. Burger King. Going in and getting some bullshit. There's coffee. Go in and in a bit of it. getting some bullshit. Getting some bullshit. McDonald's.

Getting to bullshit. Arm list. Arbys. Cash out of money. Going in and getting to a bullshit. Vending machine. Guys, this is relentless.

This is insane. Look at the spending we are doing while we are drowning in debt. You are putting your spending over your children's future right now. Sonic driving,

zelling out $400. All of the zels are between accounts. It's crazy. That's crazy. That spending's in sane. What does anyone think about what we just saw? Because what the f-

It feels like a lot of waste. It does feel like a lot of waste. But all of the Zells are between accounts. So that's how I get- Oh, come on. The Zells were a vast minority of what I was talking about. But I'm just saying.

All of those are- Yeah, how do we feel about what I just went over? I don't care about the Cope Zell. That's not great. No, it's not great. Like, there's way too much eating out. Like, way too much eating out. It's not good.

What do you guys think? What do you think, Joey? Because here's the thing. You want to know what just happened with your wife? I called out the bull. We talked about thousands of dollars of bull there. Then she tried to deflect with,

oh, but the Zell. Yeah, it's easy to focus on the part that's justifiable. It's really easy to point at that and say, look, look, that that part was very important. That's fantastic that that part was important. That was one month's worth of statements. Yeah, that was one month. That was one month in that account.

How many of those were Burger King? It's twice a week, three times a week. Mr. I only got the vending machine once a day. They were about once a day. But that is a big thing that is happening constantly. Yeah, when dying it at the store is just generally cheaper. What is this Burger King thing? No, it's just like, it's just every meal is a big event.

over at the drive-thru. Everything's a big drive-thru fiesta. When I feel like splurging at work, I'll have a peanut butter jelly and a brick of ramen. That's how I treat myself if I'm having a particularly rough day at work. And to find out that while I'm over here,

I'm down 20 pounds. I've been eating so little, I'm down weight. I haven't been working out. I haven't been trying to do better. I'm not eating right. I'm not eating good. I'm eating less. And while I'm over here,

literally tightening my belt to find out that two, three times a week, there's a fiesta going on over at stupid Wendy's. I don't know, man. And I'm just as guilty. I know I am. When you get to mine, you'll see it on there too. Thoughts on the fiesta? Like I said, when the kids want to go eat out, we kind of just do.

So it's impossible for you to say no and act like an adult? No, it's not impossible. but I do know that I had, there's been a lot of guilt. There's been, there's been a lot of guilt lately. And I know it's been harder to say no to the kids. And that's not good. I know it's not good. But I know I do it.

Like, I know I do. Like, I can't, I really can't justify that. Because if it was, if it was just me, I would say no, because I don't really like it. It doesn't make me feel good and I don't. But we get stuff too. do. I will eat there. I'm not saying I don't eat there. I'm just saying like I do it a lot of times for for them. I think the kids need a big dose of vitamin N. Yeah, they do. I think we're going to need to start getting real comfortable with the word no. Yep. And I think that it's unfair to blame all

of this on the kids here. It's not all of it on the kids. Like we do it too. We're bad. About it. It's hard. Cash up, I see $340. Wanted another water bottle? You're going through them. I appreciate it. I'm staying hydrated.

Okay. We've been here for a second, and we'll still be here for a second longer. So a rare mid-episode. Grab. Okay. Bank of America, $83. I mean, cash up there's a few hundred bucks.

It looks like he went to McDonald's in June. I don't know. and there was probably more, but again, you didn't give me a statement. So $83 in this Bank of America. You said this was the main one, right? Yeah, Bank of America is the main one. It's mostly just money being keep the change moved in, and then we immediately lose it all with the $8 monthly maintenance fee,

so I don't really see the point. And then we're transferring money out. We keep the change going in. It's a small little charge or the round-up thing, right? But then you pull it out, and then you pay a fee to have this account, and this makes no sense. You're losing money having this account. There's another fee.

Keep the change, keep to change, keep to change. This is, okay, that was nothing. This is pointless. Why even have that? That doesn't make sense to me. Okay. That's fine. Listen, I heard there was an Upstart loan somewhere, but I am not seeing it.

What loans have we potentially missed? So the only, the other debt I have is $10,000 with Upstart. It was a part of the debt relief program, but I'm breaking off from it and just going to try and negotiate myself. Okay. What's the balance of that? then 10,000? 10,000. Okay, when and what, why?

That was for an RV. An RV? Yes. When? 20. Yeah, I think it was 2021. Was this a down payment on an RV? It was for the whole RV.

Okay. What's this RV situation right now? It's sold. And you're still 010? Yes. And you're going to negotiate it or are there minimum month on it? I'm going to negotiate it right.

It went to collections. while it was sitting in debt negotiation, so it wasn't really worth it. I'd rather negotiate it myself. What did you sell it for? I think it was 14. What did you buy it for? I have 14,000.

I bought it for 25,000. Oh. And it was with the... Why did you stop paying? I couldn't afford... This was at the same time where all my stuff kind of went into either debt relief or in collections.

When we separated, I couldn't afford it anymore. Is there any other debt ones here? I have a... You have three more things in collections. Yeah, I've got Best Buy for 615, Verizon for... Oh, one of a time. Sorry. 650, Best Buy.

615, sorry. 615. Okay, great. 295 to Verizon. Okay, slow down. 295 to Verizon. Okay, we just decided not to pay any of our bills. Okay, what's the next?

And then 300 to Internet company at MediaCom. What do you guys think of all this collections? How could I sit there and criticize... Yeah. A couple hundred bucks. I'm not talking about criticizing, but just like you're hearing it for the first time, what do you think? Well, she's bringing it in. If we're trying to combine everything, right, then we're bringing it in.

She's bringing it in. She's also bringing in the discipline to have addressed some of these things. And at this point, I'm not terribly worried about Ella. Yeah, we've already discussed a lot of it. I mean, I didn't take care of it until this past year. I just let it sit. Well, I mean, other than debt relief, I always made sure to pay that one. but it didn't seem doable until it was doable.

Yeah. Even though it's small. But like, you know, I told you guys. D daunting is daunting. Went from homeless to apartment after the situation. So like I should have paid. I started paying off right then and there. Yeah.

But I blew money. It's going to be on there. I knew we blew so money, but I didn't realize how much, like honestly. I can honestly say I didn't realize how much we were blowing. And like it really does put it into perspective. And while this is terrifying and exhausting, I am really excited to get on a path where it doesn't feel daunting. Because right now it felt so daunting and I felt really a lot.

Okay, okay, okay. Okay, okay. This wasn't a... Again, it was about her. F***a sake, dude. Yes, it was about your thoughts on her, but it's not about your... Oh, yeah, yoy. It doesn't all have to come back to you.

We're not going to get out of this together if it's all about you. I mean, that's true. I'm sorry. I'm not saying that to be a dick. That's just how you're doing it. We really want to fix this. That's where we can build a more secure and decent life together. And it's really unfair to bring Ella in on the disaster that our life has become

because I haven't been doing the right thing. And Alice thought she had it hand. and she didn't. And I, I know, we want our lives to be better. And we want her to not have reasons to walk away from us. We want to build something worthwhile. What do you feel now on the walking away scale? Everything is achievable.

But it does take. He's optimistic. A lot of work and discipline. And I would like to have a lot more say on, you know, saying no. Yeah, this was a mess, guys. This was an absolute mess. And it's still a mess going forward. $17.60 in this Chase account.

Okay. Salvation Army, McDonald's, McDonald's, Magpipe, Waterburger, premium Amazon Prime, selling out $154. This is more bullshit. Bringing it down from $98 to $17 on our checking account. Oh, good. We've overdrafted this year.

I think twice or three times. Why are we overdrafting? and going to McDonald's. That's. Overdrafting and McDonald's, fuck off. What are we doing? What kind of bullshit this? Yeah, that is now my main account. My wisely was my actual main account through my work. So I switched everything over eventually when I felt like I didn't need that couple days

at advance payment. But it is a lot of bullshit. Except for the Zell. The Zell is car payment. The bullfortrafting will go into McDonald's. This is insane. Insane. having a monthly service fee of 12 bucks.

Just to have this account because you don't keep enough money in there. Wisely. Yes. So was your main. $2 in there in the main at the time. Door dashing. She's door dashing something for $27. Mattoos Island,

Makutu's Island. I hop McDonald's going in the gas station getting into bullshit. McDonald's. McDonald's. McDonald's, McDonald's, Amazon Prime Video, Premium, Airbnb, B-336, why are we going on vacation when we're dying? It was the summer vacation.

And why are we doing that when we can't afford life? I wanted to go. Thoughts. This is who we're bringing in? We all went. No judgment, sure. But come on, what the fuck we doing? Why are we doing this, guys?

We can't be going on trips if we can't afford to live. You cannot tell me, oh, no, I couldn't pay my credit card payment. If we're spending $336 just for an Airbnb. be, let alone the travel costs and food and whatever else we're doing there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah? That's our, that's our groundbreaking thoughts.

That's our reflection. Yeah. We're really going to go somewhere, guys. Pasadona, Dominoes, and McDonald's. What joke. The spending's insanity. 377 in this crypto account. Okay.

That's mine. What's our intent here? What's our intent here? I just haven't. I got it way back when we didn't have any debt. I just threw some money in it. And I just let it sit there. It's up to, I think, five now.

Okay. $5? No, 500. $500, okay. Listen, I mean, I have Bitcoin and that's a good return on investment, you know, sometimes at least historically. Is it averaging 30% a year or not? I don't know, but your credit cards are.

I would just wipe your credit cards. That's one thing we know is going to have a negative return as credit cards. $25 in some kind of retirement. Someone's in a target date fund in 255. Who has retirement? That's probably me. Okay. We are dramatically behind as a household in retirement.

What is this additional? Oh, Threat of Savings. So this would be you. $6,000 in there, right? So 15 plus the 6? Is that correct? Yeah. So or 25 plus the 6?

Yeah. Yeah. He has two. He has one from his previous and one from his career. 31,000 of retirement. Okay. Yeah. That'll keep us running for several months, it seems.

Well, that's all the paperwork. That is all the paperwork. So bathroom, them? Yeah, we can do a bathroom break. Yeah, keep your chill at that. Okay. I'm sorry. Yep.

Sorry about that. I'm making a nice little pile back here. Oh, I'm sitting there. So I wanted to say, Caleb is very right about something. You are coming into a lot. I'm fine. It's okay. I knew. And you don't have a ring.

Oh, my God. Are you kidding? You've been dealing with so much, and you've been doing it all alone, and it's not just us. It's us. Yeah. And maybe there'll be more.

Maybe there'll be more rings. Maybe you'll have a whole handful of rings fetch. Right now I want to at least. Yeah? See if that's that way. Oh, you know, it's gamble. Almost, almost, almost. You know what?

It's fine. I'll take it. Let's do it here for now. There you go. And it's gold, so it's not going. Thank you. It's not going to hurt your little thing. I hate crying.

Thank you. She's been trying to do that. for months. Here's a little box. I know how you like tiny little boxes. I do like boxes. Okay. Okay, well done, I guess.

Well done. Now you have one. Now you have one on you. That's very sweet of you to think. My fingers are small. They're very daintily. How much do you spend on that? So that, that should have actually been on the statement.

There was 100. Okay. I think it was only like 113. It wasn't crazy. Oh, should we make a budget? Absolutely. Absolutely. Interesting little detour.

Okay. Does he have to propose two? How does this work? He will when he's ready. None of us know the rules, man. Is that how that works? You propose, but then, like, legally nothing happens? We'll still do a ceremony eventually.

With three? Yeah. I think that for a long time before marriage was a government recognized institution, it was people who loved each other expressing that to their friends and family and community and in a way that everyone around them recognized. I don't feel like I need the power of the state to recognize that. You don't. I'm just thinking of her protection.

I trust me. The last thing I want to do is cause her any more grief. And you're completely right. If but only we lived in a world where individual. liberties were recognized the way they ought to be. There's a libertarian. Look, do you want to know? Maybe you'll think this is cute.

Maybe you won't. The way I tried to propose to Alice over here was one night I was complaining about taxes, which is not a surprising thing for me to be doing. Nobody likes them. I rolled over and I says, you know, you are as tied to me as anyone has ever been and our lives are completely intermingled and you could destroy me right now if you walked out the door, there'd be nothing left. And I says, why don't we just go ahead and get married so we can get that tax break?

Because for all intents and purposes, we're already married. Whether we're married or not is irrelevant because we're already there. And let's just get that tax break. And she said that was the least romantic thing she'd ever heard. And I can't think of a more romantic one. I started laughing because I thought he was joking. Okay. Well, our debt minimum monthly payments without mortgage is $2,366.17 with the mortgage alone is $3,117.

It's not including collections. It's not including the student loans. It's not including there was a USA loan. I don't know if I got a minimum of the payment. Your finances are a mess. So I'm actually going to put an extra 100 on the debt minimum fee payments. It's $2,466. I don't know.

Okay, utilities, internet, all combined. What's that looking like on a monthly basis? So that is 500 for the electric. Internet is 120. Water, gas. No, it's on a well. Okay, so 620. Cool.

Gas, vroom, vroom, drive, drive for all three. I'm about 60 a month. Exactly. You're what, 160 a month about? I have no idea. About 160. Okay, and you? It's going to be about 160 with a...

Okay, so 380. Car insurance is across the board. Yeah, it's 200. And then I'm 180. Combined 200? Okay, so 380. And your parents give you a thousand and then you buy all the groceries. Is that the deal?

Basically all the grocery. On that deal. Okay. They buy some stuff for themselves that they keep in their room. But they keep in their room. Okay. But I buy most of the stuff. Okay. Then, okay, groceries.

Let me think. 1,750. T.P. Fund for everyone. Everything else is needed. Do you buy their toilet paper and toothbrushes? No, they buy all that. Okay. We do it for all three of us.

And the four kids. So I'm going to say $5.50. It's not great, but $5.50. Medical co-pays, anything like that. Yeah, I have a pretty big medical amounts per month with everything going on. So my co-pays are probably about $250 a month right now. Okay, $250. Is there a gym?

Yes. How much? 60. Subscriptions I'll try to put in 50. Do we have any pets? Yes. Why? How many?

Two dogs. Ages, health. One's ancient, about 13. Okay. And two. No better insurance for that. Two. Health?

Good health. Pet insurance, 40 bucks. Pet food, how much a month? 60? Yeah, one big bag. Anything else? Oh, phone bills. Oh, yeah.

I paid for the year. and so mine's already paid. What is it a year? It's about $300 for the year. Okay. What else besides that? I have helium, so I do $15 a month. That's good.

We love that. 35 and this is why you're making progress. You listen to the show, I can tell them. Yeah, we have mint, and so we pay for the full year for all three of the phones. So, 35 bucks a month. Anything else that needs to be in the budget? This is the time. What else do we have that needs?

Oh, we have the two cats. And the necessary to survive budget. We have the two cats. I almost forgot about the cats. Yeah. Ages and health. They're barn cats, but they're... Okay.

Are you not getting pet insurance on barn cats? No. Do you not care? Okay. What about food? They're probably about $60. It's about the same. Cat letter two.

Yeah, it's about the same. It's probably about $60. Guys, this is not... Well, actually, no, no, no. Because the $1,000 you get... Yeah, 9,900 comes in. We need $9,800. $1.34.

Wow. Okay. Your salary, right? Mm-hmm. Okay, so I just need to pick up registry as well. So $98.66 left. Now, listen, not including the mortgage. Not including the mortgage.

So what is that? That brings us so $550,9754. $16. minus $437.911.6. So debt, debt that is not mortgages, $11,0.10. With the $98.66, that takes $1,145 months to pay off, which is, I believe, the largest we've had on this show. Probably. That is also 95 years, you guys. Well, not. be here. This is not possible.

I hope you get accepted to school. Take that turn into a higher paying job. If you do not, you are going and working literally any job that exists. I don't care what it is. They could be driving Uber Eats. It could be doing whatever. You need to bring in money. Your parents need to step the fuck up if they're going to live there and watch your kids more.

I'm sorry that life has been hard. They need to contribute because right now the house is on fire. You need to go pick up as many as you do. You're doing enough, workwise. You need to go pick up as many shifts as you can. It sounds like you can, right? Yep. So go and do that.

And then we all come together. If we're doing this combined, listen, as far as banks go, combined two and a count, I don't know what three people, but either way, combine, sit down together, even with the anxiety,

and we discuss where money went last month, where it was supposed to go, where we f***ed up, and what we need to do to adjust next month. Because this does not have any wiggle room with 95 bucks left, okay?

Or with 98 bucks left. Okay? And listen, The solution might be, once you guys change your behavior for three months, go through bankruptcy and do a clean slate. I don't love it. It's expensive. It's stressful and it's weird once we get three people involved. It won't be a three-person bankruptcy.

So bankruptcy might be an option. I don't know, but it just is the dynamic. It's not like three would be involved in the banks. So there's a few solutions. Yes, income, well, let's build it up. Still might be a 10-year payoff plan. Maybe we do bankruptcy. But before you do either or while you're doing.

either. You need to prove you change your behavior and we can budget as an household, especially with this curious dynamic. That's what I'd recommend. I'm going to give them their Hammer Financial score. Let's do that calculation. But first, make sure you click that join button, join Hammer Elite for three premium shows every single day, Monday through Friday, and join the post show for this episode. An extra 20 minutes of this episode where something crazy always happens and we'll find out. Hammer Financial score for the household. Well, we overspent zero out of ten. Debt, we have collections. Zero out of ten.

emergency fund we had a little bit in checking account but nothing in savings but for the few thousand sitting in that checking account at least give you one at ten to be generous retirement dramatically behind what was it total 30 about 35 you said 35 and we're like mid 30s on average with the household very behind i'm going to say two out of ten real estate barely an equity position in a house that needs massive updating anyway and a market that is kind of in the middle of nowhere it's not thrilling if you sold today you wouldn't make much money but at least you have an asset that it will theoretically go up and price that at least gets you a five out of ten in the interest. It's not disgusting.

It's going to be a Hammer Financial score just barely rounded up to a two out of 10. Click that join button. Join us in Hammer and Lee. And don't forget to download the dollar-wise budgeting app and get your free trial today. We'll see you in the post show. There's another debt. So we have friend debt. And now we have family debt.

What is the family debt? Who even owe it how much? It's my uncle. How much do we owe to your uncle? Uh, it's, um, it's... Glusive members' content? Click the link in the description or pin comment below and watch thousands of hours of extra and uncensored content.

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