Financial Audit - I Hate His B*tch Wife | Financial Audit

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Starting point is 00:00:52 because there's no better time than now. Griegoose, make time wait. To watch episodes of financial audit a week earlier, check us out on YouTube. How's the marriage? Fine. I think it's been hard to recover since last year. What was last year? Who was last year?

Starting point is 00:01:10 You know, we went through a... I don't know if shit, dude. A separation. Oh, you guys were separated last year. If he's going to be that opinionated on what I'm doing right or wrong, then be in it. Support me. So she has an official diagnosis and you're just like dismissing it? So if you get diagnosed with something like 15 years ago, does it last forever?

Starting point is 00:01:31 I just, I think I speak on nothing but facts. And you just speak on all emotions. And I can't argue with your emotions. Who's this person from, I'm believing her name about what? Why do you do video calls with her? Uh, very frequently. Coaching stuff? Uh, okay.

Starting point is 00:01:53 Merry Christmas in July. I'm in a giving me. mood even for you naughty ones budget debt and vesting real estate all of it 50% off right now not sure where you stand my new and improved hammer quiz does the dirty work for you two minutes and you'll know exactly how naughty or nice your finances look plus next steps based on your score take the quiz then take advantage of 50% off and finally fix your finances for good hi i'm april i'm 29 years old i'm sebastian i'm 31 years old we live in 10 Tyler's sexist.

Starting point is 00:02:27 And this is financial audit. Thanks for coming down to Austin, guys. April, what do you do for living up in Tyler? I'm a server. Okay. Well, a 29- waitress. That can make...

Starting point is 00:02:40 Yeah, server, waitress, sure. That can make good money depending on the restaurant. I mean, I know some people here in my favorite sushi places and make really good money, but then there's, you know, you could be at Chili's and not. Are you at the Chili's or the nice sushi restaurant? I'm in a new Mexican restaurant that is just taking off. Mexicans, okay. Mexicans are good.

Starting point is 00:03:01 No, Mexican's good. It's usually not a higher priced food place, meaning you're probably not making as much. Okay, but, yeah, I'm not making as much, actually. Okay, what do you make? About 500 a week, give or take. Why do you look like confused and dumbfounded and shocked and concerned? Basically every year of motion.

Starting point is 00:03:23 Are you sure it's 500 a week? I don't... Average. Average, 500. I think it's a good average. Are you averaging just the bad weeks? Not all of the weeks. Are you saying she makes more than that? I thought so. Somewhere... You think so or... Okay, so here's the thing.

Starting point is 00:03:40 Would he know? No. Clear than that. I handled the finances for the most part. Like, I do the budgeting and stuff, so I'm the one who knows. But I should know. You should know. Why doesn't he know? You're the controlling Latino wife?

Starting point is 00:03:54 Not controlling. we sit down We sit down And I go through our He can't even look at you He's afraid of being punished We sit down and we go through our budget together I give him all the information

Starting point is 00:04:08 Whether it sticks or doesn't That's outside of my control Kind of I mean depending on you communicate It's different per individual If it's not working Maybe you need a different communication style Probably I don't know

Starting point is 00:04:20 Maybe So she is controlling Better You're getting like war flashbacks all episode or something yeah like she controlling doesn't listen to me um i just have to kind of what did she not listening to uh how i think money should be spent or things that we can maybe downsize on and what do you think what's your opinion i just think that we have a little too much that we don't need in life in general like i mean like in our house like we just

Starting point is 00:04:54 What is the person who's trying to be frugal not going to say? Wouldn't that like prevent us from being in this massive stack of financial documents? If the frugal person had a say, why can't he have a say? He's not frugal. He tries to like come off as frugal even like when we talk. But then he'll be the one who's like also making purchases. So it's pretty back and forth. I mean I got to buy something.

Starting point is 00:05:20 But I can't. But I can't. So is he the controlling one? Yes. Okay. So, I mean, that was opposite of the, you know, intense Latina energy. I was kind of getting in here. So how's he the controlling one? I think we're both fighting for the control.

Starting point is 00:05:35 I think that's part of the issue. Why does it have to be control not for the teamwork? What do you mean? So what does the control look like on his side? Well, like he'll, he gets upset at any little thing that I try to do with the money or like, it's always a problem. Or if I don't listen to how he wants to do things or what he wants to do, then it's a problem. and like my opinions on matters of things are not really perceived well. Perceived well?

Starting point is 00:06:04 Accepted it. What does that mean? What happens? When you have an opinion, what happens? It's not a good one. Okay, and that might be the case, but like what happens when you have an opinion, though? It gets shut down. You're just shutting her down? Sometimes I'll tell her why it's not a good opinion.

Starting point is 00:06:21 You can't even look at her. Yeah, what's going on? Hello? No? Because... Now he just forcefully did. No, that's usually how it goes. Because, like, she'll look at me, like, super sad whenever I tell her no, and then I just

Starting point is 00:06:33 have to look up at the face and I'm like... And then I feel bad for telling her no or not agreeing with what she wants me to agree with. So sometimes it's just easier. If you were looking, it's not sad. It's mad. Yeah, sometimes you look mad and I don't like you looking mad, so... Yeah, so, like, I'll tell her that it's not a good idea because of X, Y, and Z. Or sometimes I'll just straight up just tell her.

Starting point is 00:06:54 no and okay but you go do things whether or not she says yes or no is this an understood dynamic in the house that he can just do whatever no okay then what the like like what do I do okay for example

Starting point is 00:07:10 I didn't know that you were going to have to give bleep this money for that trip that you guys took to go to that me that was completely not told to me I knew that it was outside of That's it?

Starting point is 00:07:26 I don't know. You don't even know the number? No, he didn't tell me. He just like, he told me. What was that? Is that a kid? Huh? Is that a kid? His friend.

Starting point is 00:07:33 His friend. Your friend? You're giving friend money. No, because they went on a trip for a competition and, um. You're competing in. He's a, he's a coach. What does that mean? Oh.

Starting point is 00:07:45 She said competition. Yeah. What does it mean when I say, what are you competing in? That's not what you said, though. You said what the fuck are you competing in? Yeah. That's two different things, right? No.

Starting point is 00:07:55 No? No. Okay. But now I know you're a coach, she said. Yeah. So that would have been your answer, by the way. Anyway, so he went on this trip to watch his friend and his athlete compete. I didn't know that he was going.

Starting point is 00:08:07 Who are you coaching? College athletes. What's for it? Track. Oh, okay. So he went to watch them compete. This was outside of his school, what the school pays for, like their competitions. And then he calls me when he's there.

Starting point is 00:08:19 And he tells me like, oh, we went to the casino. Good thing I won $100 so I can pay him back for the trip. And I was like, cool. So you were going to just gamble. You weren't watching. You weren't recruiting. Okay. One was multiple things were being covered on the trip, like recruiting, coaching, and there's other professionals there.

Starting point is 00:08:40 So it's like I'm learning from them also. Okay. What grade do you coach? College. Really? Yeah. Division. One.

Starting point is 00:08:48 Really? Yeah. He's really good at it, too. I don't want to get to. I don't teach in. I don't teach you. Coaching, coaching, coaching, sorry. Shotput, discus.

Starting point is 00:09:00 Okay, that fits your body type a little more. That makes more sense because I knew you weren't running. Okay. Okay. I mean, there's people like, you don't have to look exactly like what you do, right? You know what to do. Well, I know, but you do fit that mold, though. Okay.

Starting point is 00:09:13 Shock put, right? What didn't you say? Yeah. I would say versus the printer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay? Gotcha. You're going to be okay with that?

Starting point is 00:09:21 Yeah, yeah. You'll be fine. And so, hold on. wait. And so, yes, we went to the casino, but only went to the casino because I had never went there before. And so whenever you sign up, you get the free play money. What conference? Oh, is the, uh, are we in? Like, do we compete it? The Southland. Southland? Southland. Okay, it's not SEC. That's not, no. It's not, it's not, it's not of the power force. It's like a, recently, our company's softball team lost the big game by

Starting point is 00:09:52 one run. Then Dale tried to console us with the quote, winning isn't everything. Well, Dale and I are very different. I get early payout from Bed 365. If my team goes up big, I get paid out instantly, even if they blow the lead later. Sound familiar, Dale? Thanks, Bet365. Must be 19 or older Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or the gambling of someone close to you, please go to Connects Ontario.c.c.com. CAT and C-Supply. like a mid-major and there's like one right below that. Because down here there's

Starting point is 00:10:24 Sunbelt it's below Sunbelt? But it's D1? So I wouldn't Okay, what do you make? Must not be much at that point. Like I bring home. That makes sense.

Starting point is 00:10:41 This is more of a volunteer position. I would say upgraded volunteer. Okay. Are you sure it's D1? Yeah. How often do you guys win? Well, all of our sports aren't the best. Okay.

Starting point is 00:10:54 But the track team is the best out of all of them. Out of all the shit. Well, we went to regionals. So right before there's nationals, there's regionals. And we have athletes that go to regionals. Went to regionals. Mm-hmm. Just went.

Starting point is 00:11:06 Okay, very good. Didn't you have some athletes win at regionals? Yeah. So like we... What do you make, Sebastian? $2,400 a month? No. It's less than that.

Starting point is 00:11:18 D1, Coachmaking. No, the paycheck comes in is 21, I thought. Oh, that 21? Yeah, net. Are you sure it is D1? Do you even know? It's below Sunbelt? It's the one.

Starting point is 00:11:30 It just sucks. It's shitty pay. Yeah, it's just. No, I, well, yes, that is true. She's saying it's below 24. After taxes, what hits his account, is 21. Oh, my gosh. Guys, how are you surviving on $4,100 a month?

Starting point is 00:11:45 Busting my ass. Burly. No, you're not. You're making even less. No. I do extra stuff. I bring in extra money. I have to. Now you're making two. So, okay. Yeah, sure. So what's this extra you're doing?

Starting point is 00:11:59 I'm trying to start up a business. Okay, that's not doing extra. You're trying to do extra. That's... Okay, who are you coaching for no pay? Hello. No, I'm... You just audibly said L-O-L. Like, from your mouth.

Starting point is 00:12:15 In my head. You're 29. Okay. Hey, fuck me. Yeah, what do you make? Well, it's... Or what do you do? What are you trying to do?

Starting point is 00:12:24 What the fuck are we talking about? Coffee cart business. Yeah, there's definitely no coffee. That's not a crowded market at all. Okay, so what's so special about your coffee cart? Actually, a lot is special about it. Of course, I'm sure, yeah. Yes.

Starting point is 00:12:38 What is there? Vanilla and mocha and... I should have brought some... Carmel? No, actually. No, none of that. My best sellers are Cajeta Crunch. What the fuck you call me?

Starting point is 00:12:52 Cajeta Crunch. What is that? So I infused culture into my coffee. Oh, my, I'm going to f***le myself. Are you infused culture? No, just tell me what the flavor is. Well, Cajeta Crunch. A Cajeta is like caramel, but not.

Starting point is 00:13:07 It's made with goat's milk. As I said. And it's like burned, so it has deeper flavors. Okay, great. And you're next best seller? Pistachio. I mean, I love it. I get pistachio lattes when it's on the menu, so it's...

Starting point is 00:13:22 They're yummy. Yeah, it is yummy. Yeah, I do a lot. I just do, like, a different twist to, like, what most coffee places are doing. But it's different. So, my coffee beans are different. Is this one burnt as well? No.

Starting point is 00:13:33 Mm, burnt. No. Only cajita's good burnt. Okay, so what's different about your pistachio? Well, so, like, the coffee that I use, I use cold brew. I make it myself. Yeah, nowhere does cold proof. Okay, everyone does cold brew.

Starting point is 00:13:48 Your beans are different. My beans, okay? I get my beans directly sourced from Honduras. I'm Honduran, so I'm bringing my culture into it. It's really high-quality beans. I know all other coffee places use high quality, blah, blah, blah. But I do too, and it's catered for experiences, like doing events, weddings, kinsayaynettas, things like that. It's starting.

Starting point is 00:14:08 Okay. I'm breaking even. So shut the fuck up. Okay. Come on. You can't tell someone to shut up when you ask them, what do they do? do. I can do when they give a answer. It's not literally how it works. I literally, I'm starting my business. It's growing.

Starting point is 00:14:23 I'm at a point where I'm breaking even. I'm not losing money anymore. Although I still had to pay back money that I did loss. What? No, what? What? No, tell me what. So like I took out, uh, like a firm in order to invest. You were burned for your business. What else was I going to do? Small business loan? Oh, you. Oh my goodness. This is. saying affirming your startup cost is crazy. But it wasn't that much. It's not like I'm starting up

Starting point is 00:14:55 $10,000. How much? $2,000. Okay, I mean, that's a lot of money to be putting on a firm when that shit can accrue like a 35% interest depending on what you've got. This stack of paperwork is huge. You guys make no money. So you can't even tell me you're making money from this, right? Your special Honduras, Potashio,

Starting point is 00:15:11 you will great. Well, I can't calculate you will. I can only calculate what you're doing. How long have you been doing cart? Four months? Go fuck yourself. What the fuck are we doing? You haven't made a dime? What are we doing?

Starting point is 00:15:25 Okay, so this is pathetic. Well, like, the first two months was just panning. Are you going to go work for a real school someday? Yeah, that's the goal. I've given it a couple more years. I don't think so now with your track record, it doesn't sound like you guys do very well. I just said we're doing the best. Out of all the shit.

Starting point is 00:15:39 Well, I just said... And like, in his, he does really well. So, like, before you go to nationals, you go to regionals, right? I mean, you don't know that, but... Did you guys go to nationals? There's a lot of people who guys go to national. If we're basing everything off of national, there's lots of people who don't go to nationals. Did you go to nationals?

Starting point is 00:15:53 No. Well, that's what you're just trying to set up for me. I'm just saying, like, you were talking about other schools, like, you were naming other conferences in Texas. I'm just saying we did better than other schools in Texas from conferences you've heard of. Okay, nearly 7% of imported coffee beans come from Honduras anyway. That's a low percentage. I guess, but it's not as, like, hardcore unique as, like, you were trying to make it sound. I thought this is going to be like, oh, less than 1%. Like, this is going to be crazy.

Starting point is 00:16:16 I don't have that kind of money to invest on that kind of crazy source stuff. Okay, well, listen, I love the entrepreneurial mindset. I don't want to shit on that completely. But all I know is you guys do not make much money. Yes. And you guys fight about everything regarding finances anyway. I was like, you can't do things. He does whatever he wants.

Starting point is 00:16:36 So it's just like, is this what we should be doing in general? And I know from the pre-interview and everything that of the venture you're doing, he's kind of growing resentful of, kind of defending you right now a little, maybe because he's on camera and another dude's calling her out, but he was fully resentful. Why? I was resentful? You don't think I do enough?

Starting point is 00:16:53 He doesn't think I do enough. I don't know what else he wants me to do. When it comes to that, yeah, I don't think she does enough. Like what? What do you mean? I think there's no, she can be doing more on the creative side in terms of putting her face out there for more businesses or people to see her. He wants me to post more.

Starting point is 00:17:09 Yeah, I should be posting more, but I genuinely like sometimes don't have the time, mental capacity to be worried about a post. and making it perfect and all these things. He doesn't think I'm doing enough. I'm doing as much as I can with my capacity, with my capabilities for my business, but he doesn't think I'm doing enough.

Starting point is 00:17:26 But I mean, you don't care about her pursuing this, do you? I do. What do you mean? In what way? So I want this to be something that turns into something successful. Like, I've reached out to people to have her set up her coffee cart at events that are going on at the school.

Starting point is 00:17:43 I let her know other things that are going on. That's fine. But what is she doing? Because again, in the pre-interview, like, I mean, I was literally told that it was a therapy session. A fool on, like, cornycy therapy session in your entire pre-interview. So, like, there's the posting thing that she doesn't do enough of. Then I tell her, I was like, she needs to get in front of people. Not everything can be done just on social media. So, like, there's plenty of businesses around where we live. There's neighborhoods. There's apartment complexes. There's just people in our area that she can put a face with. I mean, yeah, that might be good for business. and you can give advice, but does she want the advice? I think she just wants the advice to say that we communicate. I don't think she actually wants to listen or do what I say. No, can it be tangible advice?

Starting point is 00:18:26 Because when am I going to have the time to go put my face in front of businesses, to go pitch myself to people when I literally have to have this full-time job that I don't want to have, but I have because we need to pay bills. You know, like, you want me to do 100% in these two things, but there's not enough time in the day. You just got your nails and had brunch all day on Monday. Which literally was planned. There you go.

Starting point is 00:18:51 There you go. You can plan to do that, but you can't plan to do the stuff that needs to be done for the business to succeed. I do make plans for the business. How much are you helping for her business? Do you help a lot? I think so. Dorel, that's terrible. You should be helping.

Starting point is 00:19:08 Mom, look at me. You ain't doing nothing. Okay. I mean, you don't have to. I'm just curious because if she's not putting this time and energy into things that you think she should be doing, are you stepping up and having to take care of things that she's not? Yeah, so, I mean, like outside of more stuff around the house, I mean, do more stuff around the house, but I hope with the coffee carts now that my season, my school year is done.

Starting point is 00:19:32 So I do things like that. How many events has she done in this four months? Four-ish. What the fuck? Five, six. Oh, come on. In four months. Like, come on.

Starting point is 00:19:44 And I, and I have. have already set up like 20. 20 over the course of what? In the next month. In the next month and a half. Contract signed? Yeah, if that's what you want to call it. No, I would say did they sign the contract?

Starting point is 00:19:58 Yes, yes, yes. Oh, you paid to be in the events. Oh, so it's not that they didn't hire you for it. You're just paying. I'm doing a wedding. Do you have a website? I have my Instagram account. Okay.

Starting point is 00:20:07 I don't know. Give me your phone. Open your phone. What the fuck are we doing? So you don't have a website? Okay. So how much time are you having to spend? Helping her with this shit then.

Starting point is 00:20:16 Which again, you can do, but it sounds like she doesn't want the advice. Sounds like she wants to be independent on this. I don't think I spend too much. But in terms of like the posting and stuff, I spend almost as much time on my own stuff as I do on hers. So I'm... Really? I'm sending her stuff all the time in terms of...

Starting point is 00:20:33 Which again, you can do, but does she want... Do you want that? Do you want him to do that? I want... I mean, you can't say you have no time. You spend an average of almost basically five hours a day on the phone. That's this week. Last week, it was over six hours.

Starting point is 00:20:46 I spend my, when I'm at work. Why are you on your phone at work? Because whenever we're dead, I thought you were supposed to be making money. Whenever it's dead and we'll have hours. We'll have like a busy hour and then we'll be dead for like two hours because it's still a new restaurant. I'm just on my phone. What else am I going to do? Well, it's Instagram eight hours a day.

Starting point is 00:21:00 Okay. Texting six hours a day. Facebook for four hours a day. What are you doing on Facebook for four hours a day? At that point, you should have a website. I do a lot of research. At that point, you should have a website. You should be managing things.

Starting point is 00:21:13 You should be doing a lot of things. things. If you're on it that much, TikTok two hours a day, you're posting coffee? No. Okay, then what the fuck are we doing? So that is time you could be doing stuff. And the thing is, the thing is, if you don't want to, that's fine. But it sounds like he has a problem with it. And do you agree or disagree?

Starting point is 00:21:28 It's not, I overthink. Here's my thing. Whenever it comes to, like, posting stuff, I overthink it so much. I have so many things on Canva that I've, like created, but then I'm like, it's not perfect. And I told them, I'm like, if you have this much of an issue and, like, the way that I would want you to help instead of half as just saying, like, this. is what you should be doing and like I send you stuff like why don't you can you we just log in on your

Starting point is 00:21:49 phone and can you just post the stuff that you create because I don't want to be overthinking like whether this is perfect for me to want him to help with the business or not that's what I'm confused I want to help fool in if he's full in or be in or okay what's your take so part of like all of this is that so we down we have one car now and so we rely heavenly on this one card to transport and to get to the events I need to get to so I we said the agreement was I'm gonna I have to stop Ubering because we can't just be putting the miles on the car. And then plus where we live, we have to drive out maybe like 15, 20 minutes

Starting point is 00:22:19 to actually get orders or people that need to get going. So I had to stop doing that. Are you in or out, though? I wanted to know the perspective on what she said. I'm in. You son of a bitch, I'm in. And you want him to be in. Then why will you log in on your phone and just post?

Starting point is 00:22:36 Just do the thing that I'm not good at. I suck at it. I overthink it. It stresses me out. Then why are you doing it? I love doing the event. events, being there, doing it. But the social media part...

Starting point is 00:22:47 Well, that's a part of running a business. Work for someone else that has a farmer's market. I have a husband who's amazing at it and he can be in it and he can help me in that way. Can he? Can he all the way, though? I don't know. Literally all he has to do is log in and post the things that he makes. So it's your dream, but you expect him to do your dream.

Starting point is 00:23:04 If he's going to be that opinionated on what I'm doing right or wrong, then be in it. Support me. I don't think it's right or wrong. It's you're not doing what you're doing what. needs to be done to promote the business and the way that makes us money. Like, I had to give up what I was doing that was giving us extra money so we could have. It was barely giving us money. It was wearing tear on the car.

Starting point is 00:23:23 It wasn't even doing much. Right, but it was more money in the bank account. I understand that it was wearing tear on the car, but I didn't have to ask you for money because I was doing that. Now I'm having to ask you for money. My accounts weren't going negative. Now they're going to be making money so far, right? I will make money this one.

Starting point is 00:23:39 It's always, okay. How's the marriage? Fine. It's ups and downs. Not based on the face you gave. It's ups and downs. Tell me. I think it's been hard to recover since last year.

Starting point is 00:23:53 What was last year? Who was last year? You know, we went through a... I don't know what for shit, dude. A separation. Oh, you guys were separated last year. And then we came back strong, and it was great and everything. And then it just feels like it's like...

Starting point is 00:24:12 Going towards separation again? No, not to that extent. Because I feel like I wouldn't just quit on us. What was the separation? How long have you guys been married? Two and a half years. But we were separated last year. So in our marriage?

Starting point is 00:24:27 Yeah. How long? Five, six months. Yeah. Do you think of divorce? Yeah, I was. How close were you guys to divorce? Oh, how close?

Starting point is 00:24:38 I was all the way in. I was for me. Wait, paying for what? He's still paying. He has a payment plan for all the divorce stuff that he had... You were going through a divorce. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:24:49 Yeah. So, like, it first started off as a separation, and then it just... I was like, yeah, let's just do the divorce. Oh, let's just give up. Well, what was... What are you... I mean, are you holding resentment?

Starting point is 00:25:00 I was fighting for it. I was fighting for a marriage. I was literally trying to do therapy, trying to do everything. Why were you out? I just felt like I had to do a lot of things to babysit us in terms of making sure that all of the job stuff was...

Starting point is 00:25:15 That's kind of what I'm hearing today again. Yeah. Based on your critique of how she's running her thing that isn't bringing money but takes all her time. Yeah. Okay, so go on. Sorry, you weren't. Yeah, so we were working together and I think that was a bigger stress. So, like, I had to make sure that she was doing her job so that way I could do my job.

Starting point is 00:25:31 And then it wasn't affecting both of us because if one of us got fired, then we're both pretty much going to get fired or we weren't going to be able to do it together. And then just, and then I ended up getting a speeding ticket. So that stopped me from being a truck driver. and then so that's whenever I started coaching and then she wasn't loving truck driving by herself that ended up being like a whole what the so you guys were probably making more money truck drivers make money you guys make nothing someone go be a truck driver today i can't yeah why i'm gonna be real with you your debt is not the same as everyone else's you've got your own unique mix of credit cards maybe some medical bills personal loans and collections whatever your interest rates are different your

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Starting point is 00:28:16 And finally, unfi-fri-finances for good. When I was truck driving alone, I ended up driving for a local company doing like rock hauling and stuff. I was making like $2,000 a week. It was crazy. Yeah, truck is money. I was working like 15 hours a day, waking up at 2 a.m. We were going through the separation and divorce. I wasn't sleeping.

Starting point is 00:28:38 I wasn't like okay mentally. Like I was not being a safe driver. Oh, what happened? What did you do? So in a span of two weeks, a lot. When West Jet first took flight in 1996, the vibes were a bit different. People thought denim on denim was peak fashion. Inline skates were everywhere.

Starting point is 00:28:57 And two out of three women rocked, the Rachel. While those things stayed in the 90s, one thing that hasn't is that fuzzy feeling you get when West Jet welcomes you on board. Here's to West Jetting since 96. Travel back in time with us and actually travel, with us at westjet.com slash 30 years. What? Okay, so first I got a speeding ticket.

Starting point is 00:29:18 The same one that he got, actually, it was really funny. It was a mile's over. What are we doing, guys? You're professional drivers. Yes. Clearly not. I was. Sucatic.

Starting point is 00:29:26 I was not okay. Putting other people's lives or risk, those multi-ton vehicles. What are you doing? So speeding ticket, what else? You're making it sound like more. Okay, well, the other things didn't happen with the truck. It was with my personal car. What?

Starting point is 00:29:36 I hit some animals on the road. Were they just spinning across the road or what? Yeah, yeah. Who'd you hit? It was like a coyote. Okay. The dog. A dog?

Starting point is 00:29:46 What's wrong with you? You're evil. Not evil. Sounds like it. I didn't try to eat a dog. All in two weeks, come on, hitting multiple animals and the speeding ticket. I was checked out of life. Well, guess what?

Starting point is 00:29:57 And then you made other living things actually check out of life against their consent. Like, shit, I was going through panic attacks every day. I was in the emergency room like three, different times. Why are you driving? I was fainting. Why are you driving? Because I had to.

Starting point is 00:30:11 I had to. He left. He left. He left. If you fainted, over. At 2 a.m., there's no Fripping Ubers around.

Starting point is 00:30:19 You're being selfish to that point and the selfishness had consequences. Anyways, I ended up having a car of a dog. The truck. Huh? I had an accident with a truck. It was a small accident,

Starting point is 00:30:27 but that's what got me fired. No accountability either. It's all excuses for it. It's the reality. It is the reality that you chose to do. I did. and choose for my husband to leave me and put me through the emotional turmoil that I was in. But you were going through hard times you were going to the emergency room, you were fainting.

Starting point is 00:30:45 If that is happening, do not get behind the wheel no matter what. What is I supposed to do to my husband? Not do that because you're going to get people killed. Okay. That's all that matters in the end is a human life. Yeah, which is what thing is. Yes, your self is bitch. Okay.

Starting point is 00:30:59 Well, if I didn't get fired, I was going to quit because I was like, I can't keep doing this shit, obviously. I wasn't okay. I wasn't thinking properly. Oh, yeah, we f*** know that. Clearly. No shit, selfish. Okay. Come on. Anyways, I got fired.

Starting point is 00:31:11 I have an accident in my record, so I can't be hired for like three years or something. Good, you deserve it. Never put you behind the wheel again. I'm nervous that you guys. I don't want to anyway. It doesn't matter anyway. You both are insane. But we should maybe figure something else so we can make money.

Starting point is 00:31:23 So I'm okay if someone of us does maybe get back at the truck driving. No, you guys are dangerous. Absolutely not. You need other jobs. New career paths. He shouldn't have got enough. Listen, I'll get you a course career certification. People in the audience have used those for both of you.

Starting point is 00:31:36 I don't know because this coaching thing isn't working. But it's his dream job. I don't give a fuck. Why would I give a fucking to put food on the table? I don't care. Do you have kids? If kids, if kids, if kids, then I don't, then, okay, then you have a little more flexibility. But I'll get you course screws again.

Starting point is 00:31:50 A lot of people in the audience have converted them into sick figure jobs. Okay. Okay. What? Okay. What do you want? Oh shit. Okay.

Starting point is 00:32:00 So, okay. Okay. You were one court date away from actually finalizing the divorce. Yeah. the f*** didn't you? I realized my biggest thing was I wasn't feeling listened to. Guys, you brought that up at the beginning of this conversation that you're still not being listened to.

Starting point is 00:32:15 Yeah. So I don't think anything's been solved. Yeah. So what? Tell me. So I felt like I was finally being listened to in this and then... Temporary. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:32:27 And then when I gave up and I finally signed the papers because I was like, I can't keep going through this. If he doesn't want me, he doesn't want me. Let me just sign your papers. Here you go, do whatever you want with your life. he all of the sudden felt like that was enough to regret? No, not regret.

Starting point is 00:32:42 Really? Because it doesn't sound like things are better based on what you've said in this conversation. Well, like there was a time whenever things were getting better. Like she was being more responsible, more on top of things. Yes, there was a time, but it's not today. I'm just not enough. I'm never going to be enough. Why do you have to be so dramatic about it?

Starting point is 00:32:57 No, because that's literally how you make me feel all the time. Because it's like a roller coaster where like if I'm not at my 100% best, then I'm not enough. but I can't always be at my 100%. There is an in between of like 50% and 100. But you're not okay with that. You're not doing 100 and you're barely at 50. Right?

Starting point is 00:33:17 No. Okay. Emotionally. Can you say that there's more things that you could be doing? There's a few more things that I could be doing, yes. There's always going to be more that I could be doing. But I'm like always exhausted. I'm mentally exhausted.

Starting point is 00:33:30 I'm depressed. Like you're always exhausted. That's just part of being a grown-up. Like that's being in adults. It really is. And like, I don't understand. Like, that's why I get so angry. And, like, I just don't understand how the thought process of having a kid is possible if you're saying you're always tired.

Starting point is 00:33:43 That can't be a fucking option if you're, oh, I'm depressed. I'm tired. I can't do anything. I'm going to have two four-time jobs right now. So you want a third? No. What are you talking about the third? A kid.

Starting point is 00:33:54 I want, no. I want to set us up to be at a point where we can have. He both makes a joke of a job. It's a hobby. And you, oh, I don't even know. This is pathetic. horrible behind the wheel getting people killed. You should have been arrested.

Starting point is 00:34:09 Like what the fuck is wrong with you? That's a little extreme. Not really. You were putting people's lives in danger. Let's get you the fuck off the road forever. Who the fuck are you? Well, she's off the road now. For even your own personal car?

Starting point is 00:34:21 Yeah, I barely drive. We definitely shouldn't let you in general going forward. That's for sure. So how are you setting yourself up to have a kid? I don't see that happening. Look at the stack. With the business growing,

Starting point is 00:34:35 it can get to the point where that will take care. Dude, she hasn't made a dime. What the fuck we're talking about this is growing? There's only one direction for it to go and that's up. It's literally. No, it's at the bottom. No, no, there's another direction.

Starting point is 00:34:46 She can defaults on her debt because you guys have so much debt and so much spending and bullshit. And then all of a sudden, whoopsie, they just don't even have money to even get the supplies needed to even go to these events and pay for the events and all these different things. I guess that is possible. Yes, there's a lot of things.

Starting point is 00:35:00 You think businesses don't collapse overnight? No, they do. This is a hobby. You have a hobby. you have a hobby. And the waitressing isn't doing shit. No, it's not doing shit. I wanted to stop waitressing. I had the opportunity to stop. We're just wait for money, dude. No one's going to this place.

Starting point is 00:35:14 Or is just too cheap. Something's wrong. It's starting out. They don't even have their liquor license yet. Once they get their liquor license, more people will come in and be better. Who cares? Why are you supporting them? It's a business. Go for a better business. You need to make more money. There's nothing else. In our town, there's nothing better. Then move to a place with opportunity.

Starting point is 00:35:33 We can't sell the house yet. You own a house. What is it with these people I'm talking to that are owning these houses in no opportunity areas? Why are you to do that? And we were making a lot of money in the time. You know why it's cheap because there's no opportunities? When we bought it, we were making a shit of no money. There's a college in the town, so we thought that that was the opportunity.

Starting point is 00:35:52 Yeah. We thought if we can't. Is it the college you work out? Yeah. Well, then clearly that college sucks in like every way possible. I mean, if there's only a restaurant. It's not the best. It's not.

Starting point is 00:36:03 It's the best. restaurant there. And yet it's like failing. They're starting out. I come from a college town. Hundreds if not at least a thousand restaurants. Did you come from a Bay College town?

Starting point is 00:36:18 Because this is a small college town. Also D1 and it's in the Mac conference. Okay? Similar to the Sunbell. And if that's doing better than your conference, then you need to give up. Can I give it like another year or two before I give up? Well, you make no money.

Starting point is 00:36:32 She wants to have a kid and she's aging now. So. I am aging out. Yeah, but I'm older, so I feel like there's a little bit more. What does that have to do with anything? Because if I can be patient and see, what's the aging out? Well, how long do we have? Because the biological clause.

Starting point is 00:36:44 Yours is fine. Mine is running out. So you're saying like 32 you're done? You won't be able to? Probably. I already have issues. Modern medicine is better, but they're, I mean, you don't, you don't want to be, you want to be young and spry for the kids.

Starting point is 00:36:56 Okay. And so then I have to get a job based on us having a kid, which I understand I have no problem of doing. I can get a... Do you want to have a kid? I mean, you almost divorced her last year. Yes, I want to have a kid, but I don't want to be the only thing that's holding the household afloat.

Starting point is 00:37:14 And that's where I feel like that's what it is. Basically, his love language, by the way, as a coach, I mean, in the entire pre-interview, it's that, like, working together, you two together and trucking showed who you really are. And he can't feel like he loves someone who isn't making their lives better and that you guys aren't on the same page. You guys aren't on the same team. All the shit.

Starting point is 00:37:34 And for someone like him who is a professional coach, that actually does matter. No shit he would want to leave, want to be with someone who's actually contributing. Yeah. He looks down on you. You're not a provider. You don't do anything. Your business is a failure. It does feel like you look down on me.

Starting point is 00:37:49 You didn't say you looked down on her, but everything you're saying is looking down on her. Oh, well. That is how I perceive it too, just so you know. But that might not be invalid. No, I mean And he can't be with someone that he considered it's pathetic and not contributing to the relationship

Starting point is 00:38:05 To the partnership To the team To the team To bring in the remaining money that we need Because you're busting your ass and only making 2,000 hours a month Meaning that it's actually worse Because there's people that are lazy that make more than you Which is crazy.

Starting point is 00:38:17 Oh my God No, that just means you suck Okay You're a horrible teammate She used to be in like pharmaceutical sales And I told her maybe we said something we should try to get back into I'm not going to go back to that shit I hated it. I hated it.

Starting point is 00:38:30 Yeah, so you hate not making money now. You hate making money. At least money problems would be solved if you were doing that. There's more to life than just money and I'm not going to have a job where I'm hating myself because of the job that's so unethical that I'm having to do. Right. There's more to life than money, right? There is.

Starting point is 00:38:47 You guys have to pay the bills and if you want kids, you need to be set up for it. And you guys have a lot of debt. And the number one reason why people get divorced is because of finances, right? It's not the number one, but it is a leading cause. Okay, it's up there. And if you allow, yes. but you almost got divorced already, guys. You got closer than any couple on the show.

Starting point is 00:39:02 As far as I know. Yeah, because he just gave up. He just wanted to give up and throw in the towel. I don't think it's necessarily giving up. Like, he accepted the L. And you guys are now. Like, your relationship might not be a complete failure, but your finances are.

Starting point is 00:39:14 And if that's a big part of it, if that's a big part of it, which it sounds like it is, like, yeah, maybe you guys did lose. Yeah. That was my mindset for a bit. I just don't see how I don't do enough. When I am working,

Starting point is 00:39:25 I've always been working. How can you keep on saying you don't understand how you don't do enough? And then I'm giving me examples of how you're not doing enough. So again, in your like pre-interview therapy session, he was saying,

Starting point is 00:39:43 or he always makes it feel like you're making him out to be the bad guy. Is that true? That's what you said. Oh, me? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I think if I don't agree with what she says,

Starting point is 00:39:57 then I just turn into the bad guy. If I don't 100% support, every single idea that she has, and then I'm just the negative Nancy that just poops on every plan. And that's kind of crazy, because you're supporting his insane dream job that is bullshit, and he's supporting your insane dream job that is bullshit. You guys are supporting each other in your lunacy. But whenever I took the job, I was also Ubering to make up for money that we were needed.

Starting point is 00:40:21 Make more the high school coach. Yes, that's something that is being thought about, and I'm working through trying to figure that stuff out. So it's like, if you guys are already supporting each other in your lunacy dreams, then how can you say he's the villain? I never said he was a villain. You make him feel like he is though. And he makes me feel like I'm not enough. Clearly we're both doing something wrong with how we're making each other feel. Are you enough? Yes. How? I'm pretty great. I work hard. But you don't bring anything to that hard work. Is it a result? Not the actual working that makes the difference in the other? Maybe I don't know

Starting point is 00:40:52 how to better structure myself in order to get better results. But instead of criticism, maybe I could use some guidance and some help. I know that I'm not... He's not a professional business owner. How is he giving that? Well, but then don't give the criticism if you can't give the help. It sounds like he is trying for what it's worth. He is trying and I do recognize it.

Starting point is 00:41:12 And I tell him that. What are you talking about? You specifically told Lindsay that he does not meet your needs. What is that? What does that even mean? Well, like emotionally and stuff. You know, like in a marriage, like I want my husband to support me lovingly, not to always be like a father who's like looking down on me criticizing me.

Starting point is 00:41:29 Yeah, that might be his coaching nature. What is this not meeting needs? That happens. I want to be loved. Well, tell me. I want to feel loved. Like, you know. Examples, lady.

Starting point is 00:41:39 Okay, okay. And I've been telling him this. When we started, it was like a fairy tale. Not a fairy tale, but like. Welcome to every relationship. No, okay. But like, why can't we get back to that? Like, why can't you hug me?

Starting point is 00:41:50 Why can't you give me kisses? You don't hug her? You don't kiss her. I have to ask for it. I have to ask for it. Why am I having to beg my husband to give me affection and attention? Why? That doesn't make sense. You're my husband. You should want to give me a kiss when I come home. You should want to give me a kiss goodbye. You should want to wrap your arms around me. You should want to take pictures of me like you used to. But you don't. Because I'm not enough. You're losing me at the picture thing. But at least giving her a hot. It was an us thing. Yeah. It was a thing. Yeah. So like I do. I don't even face. I hug her. I kiss her. Do I smother her in hugs and kisses like she wants? No. But I'm always having to ask for it. Just because you just because you just because you. Just because you. I do. I'm. I'm. You ask, like first thing when you come into the door, it doesn't mean you have to always ask.

Starting point is 00:42:32 No, I always ask. That's like me saying I come home, where's dinner? I don't have to ask for dinner. I can just make it myself. Like, give me a second. I will give you a hug and a kiss, right? But you don't. But, okay.

Starting point is 00:42:43 No, like, literally lately, I get home and I'm like, let me see how long it'll take. Let me see how, that's how bad it's gotten. Because in my head, I'm like, does he even care to give me a hug? I mean, like, does it even matter to me? I'm not really argue with that. But if I see you every single day, we wake up and sleep together, like we sleep in every single day. I don't think I need to welcome you home like you came back from war with a hug and a kiss, unless I'm wrong in that logic. Yeah, you're wrong in that logic.

Starting point is 00:43:15 We're not like friends living together. We're husband and wife. You work. But I'm not even half a mile away from me. I stopped by the restaurant to see you on like twice a week for lunch. Which is nice. I do like that. Okay. So, like, again, I don't need to shower you with hugs and kisses every time that I see you.

Starting point is 00:43:36 But that's, okay. A concern here, I thought you both said you work your asses off, but you sleep in every day? Because I've been trying to make up for that time that I've missed out with her when I... He's been gone a lot. That shut the fuck up. Come on. We sleep it every day. Shut the fuck up then.

Starting point is 00:43:53 You're pathetic. You're not working hard. Shut up. This has just been the past few weeks. Come on. Come on. How often you guys... Three times a week?

Starting point is 00:44:05 What, then? What are you talking about? Three times a week. So you're getting affection. You're getting love. You're getting in touch. Right? Unless it's just like he's not looking at you and it's just like, you know, like an animal.

Starting point is 00:44:17 I like the lights on. So like that's... There's been times when I ask for it and I get rejected. Oh, that's going to happen sometimes. It happens a lot. Okay, well, but if you're at three times a week, I think you're okay. It's a healthy amount, right? Once or twice a week lately.

Starting point is 00:44:35 Oh, so it's going down. Don't be German. Okay. Well, Lindsay is saying that she said she feels constantly rejected. Constantly. So what does that mean? That means I put myself out there. I try to like start something and then it's there's always an excuse.

Starting point is 00:44:52 There's always a reason of why not. When I try to initiate, it gets shut down every single time. that I try to initiate, it gets shut down. So I have to wait until he feels like it. Well, yes, both have to feel like it. I'm not going to say like every single time. If I don't feel like it and he wants it, then I'm going to get myself in the mood for him.

Starting point is 00:45:10 Okay, you're better than me. I don't know what you tell you. I will say there is a mathematical equation here. If we're just talking basic biology, if he wants to, you don't want to, and you say, okay, that's 30 seconds. If you want to and he doesn't want to, I could be like a 10 minute marathon

Starting point is 00:45:30 that he has to Just like You know because whenever I'm in the movie It's great A stuff And you can't argue with that So I was just saying to get him to come It's like 30 seconds

Starting point is 00:45:38 You're your mission I'm not You're an easy comer I make it a whole performance Like it's not something That I just jump in and out of So like it takes Give me your phone buddy

Starting point is 00:45:50 Okay What is the background Black people in anime You don't like anime? No, it's always the thing. It's very interesting. So, like, why do you mean black people? Like, only black people in anime?

Starting point is 00:46:09 It's very interesting. Like, the only ones who like it? Every single time. Black people tend to like anime. This is definitely following very goony content on Twitter, I will say. Mm-hmm. There's some booty shaking and shit like that, which is a little interesting.

Starting point is 00:46:26 And then booty, booty, booty. This is everything on, everything on... X so far as soccer and ass. Okay. Huh? I don't use X. Okay. There is a guy he sends like stuff and I have to.

Starting point is 00:46:50 Huh? What? I have a co-worker that sends stuff. Sends what? Stuff. That's not appropriate. Where? On Instagram.

Starting point is 00:47:05 Okay. WhatsApp, maybe. Huh? So that's just where it's some of my. You said WhatsApp? Mm-hmm. What? What?

Starting point is 00:47:12 Just booties and boobs and... Why? Just his sense of humor. I think I know who you're talking about. And Brad and I are both the guners, but we don't send each other, you know? That's not how he passed time? Is that what he sends? Sometimes.

Starting point is 00:47:34 Oh, my God. Okay, you talk to a lot of people on WhatsApp. Why? Part of recruiting. Okay. He's always recruiting. He's always working. Who's this person from... I'm believing her name about... Who is this?

Starting point is 00:47:53 An athlete. Why do you do video calls with her? Very frequently. Talk about coaching stuff? Uh... Okay. Yeah, some of it is coaching talking. It's a little interesting. You've met her a lot. Picked her up a lot from the airport. She's from a different country.

Starting point is 00:48:21 But why? What's your relationship with her? My athlete? What's my relationship with my... She's your athlete? Yeah. She plays there. Yeah. At your school? Yeah. But she lives in Germany. Correct. Okay. You guys text a lot. But, okay. I just didn't know the student athletes and coaches

Starting point is 00:48:39 texted this much. Listen, I haven't seen anything like alarming. It is a lot of texting, which is very weird, but maybe that's normal. I don't know. I think, um... It's always the women.

Starting point is 00:48:55 Why aren't you texting the men that much, though? That's something that I tried to figure out. The guys don't talk a lot. No, you're not texting them as much. I call them, but... But you're really texting these very attractive women a lot. But they're kids.

Starting point is 00:49:12 They're not kids. I wouldn't say they're attractive, but I guess I can see how someone else would. What? Come on. She's attractive. What the fuck you're talking about? What do you? Come on.

Starting point is 00:49:25 Don't with that. What's this? What is it? Holofly? It looks like hinge, but I guess it's not. Okay, that's good. Who does concerning? I do think that he invests,

Starting point is 00:49:37 more time than necessary into literally every. Maybe, maybe not. I'm not 100% sure. It's just, it's just interesting that it's always the young women, you know? Sure. What's the gender split on your team? I have two guys and four girls. And then next year I'm going to have four guys and seven girls.

Starting point is 00:50:06 Whenever I travel, I'm gone for three or four days of the week. And that's from And that's from the start of the second week agenda To like the whole second semester I'm pretty much gone half a week Well that wasn't a really thing too concerning on his phone But is around these attractively And you're not concerned with him traveling?

Starting point is 00:50:23 No, it's just the fact that like he doesn't know how to balance Like his work and... Either you support his dream job or you don't I don't know what to tell you But he gets home and he's still working Okay It doesn't stop working But part of it is that

Starting point is 00:50:37 I talk to international athletes athletes, and so the time zone in Germany or in New Zealand are drastically different than times here, so I have to be on my phone. What is this other woman that I have in my notes? His job. Who is she? The job. Oh.

Starting point is 00:50:53 Oh, okay. Okay, what do you guys think your financial score is 0 to 10? Negative. 0.75. Before we keep going, quick word from today's sponsor. Look, every business owner right now is hearing the same thing. You need AI! You need AI! You need AI! Okay, great. But if your financials are in one place, inventory and somewhere else, HR is a mess, and nobody can get a straight answer from the data, AI is not the problem, your systems are.

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Starting point is 00:53:33 Head to Zocdoch.com slash Caleb to get started and check that approach. appointment off your to-do list. That is Z OCDOC.com slash Caleb. All right, back to the financial chaos. Okay, it can't be negative, but okay. If you want your Hammer financial score, get it for free at Calebhammer.com, figure out where your score is zero to 10. And the world of finance is where you doing poorly, where you're doing it. If you don't want to be like a guest who ends up on the show, make sure you download the dollar-wise budgeting app. Take the free trial. See if it works for you. It works for tens of thousands of monthly active users for a reason. And if you like, it's not for the annual version because it saves almost 50% and you get the physical version of my 30-day meal plan signed by me mail directly to you and also the digital version of the cookbook.

Starting point is 00:54:14 So check that out. Listen, I understand you guys the relationship is messy. Yes, you should, you should hug your wife. You should kiss your wife. That's normal. That's fine. I understand if it's up and down with sex that happens, we're busy, we're tired, whatever. That's normal.

Starting point is 00:54:25 But like, I mean, guys, what are we doing? And if you guys just think each other are the controlling ones in the relationship, like how do we get anywhere? I don't know. How do you guys communicate on my? Like all this, all this right here. You said, you know what? He doesn't know anything. So where's the communication on the money?

Starting point is 00:54:40 So she tells me this is the plan and this is how things are going to happen. And I trust her and I say, okay, so I send her the money whenever she asked for it. And then whenever I need money for something. Send the money. Why are we not combined? We had a combined account when we got married and we just never used it. And they got closed out. Why should he have to send money?

Starting point is 00:54:59 That's weird. Because it's just easier. No, it's not. If everything, no, it's actually not. It's actually easier to budget as a household if everything goes into one account. I'm down. Is he not? He just didn't care to use it or do anything with it.

Starting point is 00:55:11 Yeah, we just never got back to doing it again. It was just because we had the same job before, so our paychecks were the exact same. But how can you manage off of two accounts that you just don't even see insight into? How can you manage the household? Because most payments come, like, I just pay for it. He only is in charge of the Internet and the car insurance and his credit card minimum. So when he gets paid every month, he keeps what he needs for those payments

Starting point is 00:55:35 and just sends me the rest and then I pay everything else. So it's just easier because he was really bad at making payments. He would end up making late payments and things like that. So how do we talk about the money though? You just accept it when she says these things? Yeah, she has it written down and we look at it.

Starting point is 00:55:50 So she would be the controlling one then. Yeah. Because I organize it. I'm the organized one. How can you say he's controlling then? If he says you can't spend money. Well, yeah. Oh, you're the one managing the money.

Starting point is 00:56:01 I'm really. That dynamic is just so confusing to me. I mean, you guys spend $400 more than you brought in. So, like, I think I, she says, I'm controlling because, like, I don't, I tell her she's not allowed to go to the grocery store. Because anytime we, she, like, what? That's crazy. A list of two items.

Starting point is 00:56:19 She'll always get 10 items. Like, it's never, ever, it hasn't been a trip where she goes in for exactly what she needs and only gets those items or less. It's always more. So I said, no more going to the grocery store. So you go to the grocery store. store then? Yeah, most of it. Well, that's weird to not let your wife go to the grocery store.

Starting point is 00:56:37 Why? We have a conversation around budgeting around what we're able to spend on and we allocate from there instead of just saying, no, you can't go to the grocery store. I understand that, but if it saves an argument of her just constantly keep on doing the same thing, then why not I just do it? That's just avoiding forever and letting a building them blow up. But I have no problem. To another one more meeting before divorce again.

Starting point is 00:56:55 I have no problem. Just going to the grocery store. Sure, but you're gone sometimes. Oh, you're talking about, yeah. Oftentimes a lot. You're gone a lot. Whenever I come back, I make sure that Sunday I go to the grocery store and get what we need to do for the week. I plan accordingly.

Starting point is 00:57:08 I say, hey, I got this for you for the week or I got this for me for lunch. You for the week for me. This is so weird. Maybe she is right that you guys are more like roommates than a married couple. Yeah, I think so. You're good with that? That's what you want? No, that's not what I want.

Starting point is 00:57:24 Well, it seems like you're the one encouraging it with how you're managing it and how you're trying to stop an argument because I feel like we just communicate just for the fact to just saying that we just talk. Like no thing actually comes out of our communicating. When we were given actual tactics of how to communicate, you don't want to do that stuff. That's not true. Those phone conversation, things like that. I don't need a hold a spoon in my hands to know who's talking. It's a fucking tactic of how to communicate that we were taught, yet we don't use any of these things that we were taught. Okay.

Starting point is 00:57:52 So when we did therapy before and the therapist said we came to the conclusion that I make everything just sound like a suggestion and not an actual answer. I changed the way that I said things. I made more decisive statements. It was either yes or no. And then once I did that, you still weren't listening to me. And then I told you I didn't want to be that person that's just yelling at you to make sure that you listen to me, even though you said that's the only way that you listen.

Starting point is 00:58:17 So I changed how I communicate and nothing changed. So holding a spoon does not give me faith that all of a sudden we're going to learn how to effectively communicate. Okay. The spoon was a tactic that we did. That's just one example. of different things that we were taught and how to better communicate. I understand that.

Starting point is 00:58:37 And I gave you something that we actually went to therapy for. Therapy, that therapy that we did, like those two times. Oh, two sessions? Come on. That's not effective. And she wasn't a couple's therapist. She was my therapist that I was like, can I bring my husband in? Because you shouldn't do that into individual therapy.

Starting point is 00:58:54 No, you're talking about, I'm talking about the first one, the premarital therapist. I was like one thing. Okay, but I'm saying you said. Before we got married, before there was actual issues. between us because we were still having... These are the same issues. But, okay. But what?

Starting point is 00:59:08 I do recognize, so before everything went down last year, we almost got divorced, I was living in the Lululand thinking like nothing was a problem, everything was fine. Wait, really? Were you bringing up issues? He would bring things up like suggestions. No, because... How are you bringing them up? Jokingly sometimes.

Starting point is 00:59:24 How are you bringing them up? It's his answer. I say, I don't think that this is a healthy way of going about this. I think this is taking away a lot of... Okay, for example, when we were a truck driving, she would constantly stop for a lot, for whatever reasons. P breaks. Yeah, P breaks.

Starting point is 00:59:42 And then the P brakes turned into she was having conversations with her family members, and she had to solve a lot of problems. Did she do a little driving? No. And so she had to stop driving, like pull over to help out with whatever that the family had going on. And so. They used to be very dependent on me. On and off, that's not a problem.

Starting point is 00:59:58 But it was every single day. And so whenever she's only allowed to drive the eight hours that she's supposed to, that puts me behind on the hours that I need to be driving to make up, like, for... But did you actually bring up the issue? Yes, I said that you needed to stop doing this. No, he would say things like, maybe this is not the right way to handle this. Maybe we should... And do you not get the hint or you're...

Starting point is 01:00:17 Yeah, I was at the time. Are you not? No. How are you not then? Now, what's different? Because now I actually, like, take into account what he's saying and, like, look internally and like, okay, is this a problem? He's afraid to start arguments. Oh, he's afraid to start arguments.

Starting point is 01:00:32 I don't know he's afraid of time. Now I actually have conversations. Before I couldn't even communicate. Now he doesn't. You do. He doesn't. No, he doesn't. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:00:40 Because before I would like, I don't know what to say. I would shut down. And now I actually speak up. I give you my opinions. I tell you what I don't like. What this, that, and the other. Every time he brings up his honesty, he just says you're mean. That's what he said.

Starting point is 01:00:53 That's what he needs. That's what he likes. Because when I was nice and sweet, he never listened to me. So now I have to be bitchy and I have to be mean for him to be receptive to anything I say you want. Who likes that? You don't like that. What are we doing right now?

Starting point is 01:01:06 What are just being nonsense? Yeah. No, like I tell you what needs to be done. You reply back after I lay it down on how it needs to be done. You say, I feel like I'm not enough. I feel like I don't do enough. What I do isn't enough. And it makes me feel like I'm not good enough.

Starting point is 01:01:25 That's what happens whenever I say how we need to do better. And so whenever you reply with that, I don't, what am I supposed to do? I think I speak on nothing but facts and you just speak on all emotions. And I can't argue with your emotions. And that's why I just stop arguing and stop talking. Emotions are impossible to argue with.

Starting point is 01:01:45 It really is. Because this is not logical. It never is. I mean, that is true. Yeah. I deal with that every day on this show. Your feeling is a feeling. I think I take a lot of what he says into consideration,

Starting point is 01:01:58 but it doesn't separate the fact that we're in a mayor. where feelings do matter. Feelings do matter, yes. And he completely disregards those. But if the feeling is the entire argument and outweighs the reality of a situation, that becomes an impossible conversation.

Starting point is 01:02:13 Maybe we've been having a lot of impossible conversations because I've been very emotional lately because things have just been really, really bad. Again, so we're headed towards that divorce again. Why are things really, really bad? That's what I tried to ask at the beginning and you guys can't answer. If things are really, really bad,

Starting point is 01:02:26 what is it? I need insight into this household, guys. What's really bad is that I just don't think that she does enough. I really was relying on her to take off with this coffee car, not even take off. Like, I'm okay with not. That's delusional. I don't want to say where it's at, but I was putting faith that she was going to be putting more work into it to be at a better place.

Starting point is 01:02:45 And that's not what's happening. I don't always have to be just me who's putting in all the work. So I'm not doing anything? It's exhausting. So I'm not doing anything for your business. No, I'm not talking about like you're doing something for my business. But like it's summer vacation. You don't have as much workload as you did.

Starting point is 01:03:00 But what are you doing? I sent you a whole sheet of companies and people that we need to go talk to to take off with this business. Did I not? But you just give ideas. You just give ideas. Did I do that? Can you like make plans? Did I send you this stuff?

Starting point is 01:03:17 Yeah. Okay. And so I think we can agree that my strong suit is not talking to people and putting a bubbly face to these people, right? So why is that not something that you do? I present the idea to you on this is who we need to go talk to and you never follow up on any of that. Because my schedule's already full. And then you don't even know how many like events that I have signed you up for

Starting point is 01:03:39 that just didn't go through. I do because I got the calls that they didn't go through. I did put your email on there. So you do know. Actually, I'll take it back. Sorry. I just feel like I've. And the ones that I signed up for that he thinks that I'm sitting there and not doing

Starting point is 01:03:50 anything. But I actually am signing up for events and doing all these things. You're just only relying on farmers markets. Like you're not actually getting up and walking and talking to any. Anybody. Like there's so many people that you can actually meet in the neighborhood in the town and you're just not doing that. What you said you were going to go like figure out the Rotary Club thing like months ago and you just yesterday told me what you figured out with that. Okay.

Starting point is 01:04:14 So actually it was a misread of mine at the beginning. I honestly thought this because it was weird. It was like you're like, oh, I want her business to do so well. And you're like, oh, he has a dream job. I really want that. And you're, it's like, I was like, wait, what actually is the problem? You see, no, this is a complete disaster. This thing.

Starting point is 01:04:28 this passion project, this business. You guys, this is like the fight. Yeah, it is because even before, like up to this point, I completely misread that. I think, I mean, that's insane. That entire, like, I zoned out there for a second, just how you guys are being. She was, I think all the products that she was buying, I thought it was overly expensive. Like, I didn't know anything about, like, any of the coffee stuff, but I just looked into it for a little bit. I immediately found her cheaper coffee that she could be using without something.

Starting point is 01:04:58 sacrificing the quality. I found her cheaper coffee cups to be using. So every, like from the very beginning, I've been finding cheaper ways to do what she's been doing. I think I've been more than helpful in everything and I haven't given her a hard time about that stuff. I got frustrated because it seems like I'm always finding the cheaper way to do something or to maximize the money. But why are you upset about helping me? I'm not upset about helping you. I'm doing literally everything I can to help you. I just want you to take initiative charge in your business. This isn't my business. I'm doing, you're doing like. 10% and I'm doing the other 90%.

Starting point is 01:05:30 The 10% I'm doing saves us so much money. Right. And thank you. But just because you're having to do 10%, you're bitching and whining about it. As if like, I shouldn't have to do this. I shouldn't. I shouldn't.

Starting point is 01:05:43 I don't ask you to come help me with my job. That's something I took on. So you don't want to be involved in the coffee car at all. I have no problem helping you. Yes, you do. You clearly do. That's what you literally just said. The 10% you don't want to do.

Starting point is 01:05:57 No. I said the 10% because you minimized the 10% like it was nothing. The 10% saved us a whole lot of money. The 10% is putting you in front of more people. I will not ask for help on the coffee cart. You need the help. You're not doing anything. I'm not doing anything.

Starting point is 01:06:16 I'm not doing the other 90%. Cool. The 90% the once a month? It's going to, I've booked pretty much every single weekend from now until the end of August. Yeah. I agree. You did. You did do that.

Starting point is 01:06:30 because it was the only dates available. I would have been booked more previous to now if the dates were available. Okay, so why are you only relying on farmers markets to sell the stuff? I'm not. I'm also trying to venture out and do the weddings. I have a wedding booked.

Starting point is 01:06:42 It's just the first of many that are going to come. Who's the wedding with? Your athlete. Okay. So that wouldn't have been possible without me, right? Yeah, I'm not minimizing the help that you do give. I'm saying the little help that you give, you bitch and moan about it.

Starting point is 01:06:58 So don't help. Okay. Then the coffee, It's never going to succeed then. Oh, because I can't do it without you. You haven't been. I have been. He just went over how you're not making any money.

Starting point is 01:07:08 And then it would have been worse if I didn't find cheaper solutions on everything that you were already doing. For so long, you couldn't tell me how much their cups were. No, I did tell you how much things. No, eventually. You couldn't tell me how much the supplies cost you. Because I didn't have it in front of me. I'm not memorizing every single little thing, but I have things written down. You asked me.

Starting point is 01:07:32 when we're in the middle of doing something, I can't pull it up out of my ass. If I don't know it, I want to give you an exact number. I just thought you would know the business on the back of your hand in terms of how much everything costs. You want me to memorize all these things?

Starting point is 01:07:43 Yeah. No, I haven't written down. I'm organized. I haven't written down because I know I don't have the mental capacity to be memorizing every single little thing. Okay, you're just organized, just to say you're organized.

Starting point is 01:07:53 You're not actually doing anything with the organization. Okay. Did that answer any questions? I mean, in general, honestly, guys, that's the dissonable. agreement right now, that's the fight? That's one of the fights. What's the other one? Oh, what's the

Starting point is 01:08:11 other one? That's my emotional stuff. That doesn't matter. No, I guess it does. If it's a fight, what's your emotional shit, you crazy? I've been depressed. He doesn't get it. Because my brain decides not to make certain hormones. That's how depression works for some people.

Starting point is 01:08:26 Maybe. It's not just, I'm sad. It's literally There's like something wrong with my brain right now. So far it's sounding like a self-diagnosis. No, it's been diagnosed and I just, I recognize when I comes up. He doesn't get it. He's like, these things happen and you should still be able to do everything. It literally is so hard to just get out of bed every morning. So she has an official diagnosis and you're just like dismissing it? So if you get diagnosed with something like 15 years ago, does it last forever?

Starting point is 01:08:55 Yes, no, maybe. Yeah, maybe it's a diagnosis. Just because I don't go to therapy, like regularly because we can't afford it, doesn't mean that the diagnosis disappears. Right. And so, yes, I guess I'm completely dismissing her depression state right now. But the way that I look at it is we're not in a spot where we can just be... Allowing it? Doing nothing. If you can identify your problem and you're not doing anything to make the problem better,

Starting point is 01:09:24 then it just feels like you're an excuse... I literally find myself every single day to just get out of bed and do the things that I need to do, to go to work, to do... I have to do that too. I want to lay in bail day. But you are not going through this. So what does that look like in the household this conversation, guys? How are you surviving?

Starting point is 01:09:50 If he doesn't even believe in your own diagnosis, how do you make it from here? I don't know. I couldn't do that. I don't know. I mean, a real diagnosis is real diagnosis. Yes, I agree. There's lots of TikTok diagnosis is bullshit.

Starting point is 01:10:06 Like, is that an act incredibly dismissive? Borderline is just bad as a partner? Is it? Is it? Repeat your question. I don't know for a second. Is that not just bad as a partner? Yeah.

Starting point is 01:10:21 Then why are you with someone that doesn't even believe in your own mental health shit? That's real diagnosed. When was it diagnosed? Before I met you. Okay. I just didn't. What's your point?

Starting point is 01:10:30 I just never saw anything or... No, I've spoken to you about it. This is the deal. Anytime that work situations get really hard, coincidentally, something with her mental state. always is correlated to that. Then why be with her? Yeah, why be with me?

Starting point is 01:10:47 Why'd you come back to me? Because I thought things got better. Like, you talked about how you had a better work ethic. I mean, I saw that you had a better work ethic whenever you were at that trucking gravel place whenever you got the accident. But I just thought that things would just keep on getting better. And so, like, you taking, wanting to do this coffee cart, put you in that position to have to be like that.

Starting point is 01:11:05 But you coming back to me was writing on life just continuing to get better. Instead of like living normal life with somebody else as a partner where things go up and down. I understand things go up and down. Like, I'm not delusional. Like, not everything is always going up. But why is it every single time that you have a rough time at work? You always say, oh, I'm depressed.

Starting point is 01:11:26 Well, you can't use it as a crutch as a fallback. If you weaponize it in the relationship. It sounds like a little, if you have a tough time of work, you can't just be like, oh, my depression. I think it's a real disability. No, it's triggers. So what triggered my depression is the fact that I'm a, I'm a waitress. And I have men all the freaking time hitting on me.

Starting point is 01:11:46 And I tried and he didn't want me to. He told me to stay. He didn't give a damn that I was getting hit on at work. You didn't care that she was uncomfortable getting hit on at work? No, he didn't. He laughed at all. He made a joke out of it. But if she's uncomfortable, that's not good.

Starting point is 01:12:00 Why would somebody be a waitress or a bartender then if they're thinking that they're not going to get a hit on? Yeah, maybe. But if she's uncomfortable, wouldn't she support that? She had another chance to get a job at a church. The church is an hour and 15 minutes away. She said she would take it if she stayed at her mom's place. That's not even 10 minutes away from there. All of a sudden she had the chance to take the job.

Starting point is 01:12:20 And she said, I'm not going to stay at my moms anymore if I do that. No, that's not what I said. I said, do you actually not care that I stay on my mom's? He can't agree on what happened. No, he's just like making the words whatever he thought it was being said. But what was said is I just asked, are you going to be comfortable with me staying at my mom most of the week and being away from home? and he said

Starting point is 01:12:43 No? No, there was no answer. It was a back and forth or like, but you said you would be okay with that. So time out. I just wanted to know whether you cared or not. Part of what was going on,

Starting point is 01:12:53 we were actually at conference so it's like our biggest track meet of the year. So she was sending this to me while I was doing that at the same time. So I could have misread her text message, but I know I replied back with

Starting point is 01:13:04 the deal was that you taking this job was that you were going to stay at your moms. Right? Yeah. Okay. So then how is that not an answer? because I was asking you. I said the deal for you taking this job is you staying at your moms.

Starting point is 01:13:20 Okay. How is that not an answer? That's not an answer. Well, I mean, is it the most clear? No, but it's like you can get insinuate, kind of like the, when he was trying to tell you to do it better before. I just wanted to know whether he cared, whether he would want me to come home like every other week or something. And then eventually I said that, would you want me to come home every other week and things like that?

Starting point is 01:13:41 And he was like, the deal was for you to stay. there. So clearly you don't care that I'm not home. You don't care if you don't see me. I think dude just gets down to business. Yeah, money's pretty important. Okay, not really. You're doing D2 activities to... Well, I said I'm also working on a way out of that too, so... Uh-huh. But... Okay, this a firm has $3,0.46.84 on it.

Starting point is 01:14:06 Minimally payment is 602.23, essentially. And it's for bullshit. It's Amazon, Nike. Bullshit. Some grocery... We're affirming groceries. That's where we are, guys. Come on. It was for the business. No, well, that's, but you're affirming shit for your business. That's not a good sign. Okay. Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.

Starting point is 01:14:24 Just business shit, bullshit, bullshit. It's all stupid. What are you doing? I don't know. Are they all in paying for us or financed? Some of them have been paid for, but finance. Are they pay in for? Oh, finance, finance, finance, finance, finance.

Starting point is 01:14:39 So we're talking like a 36% interest rate, ladies and gentlemen, for her business, that makes no money, 36% interest rate. The SB 500, one of the best indexes you can be a part of. Average is 10% a year. That's considered a good return. She's at a 36% loss. Is it really that much interest rate? I don't, I didn't think it was.

Starting point is 01:14:55 I thought it was like 24. Pull it up, pull it up, put it up. And I want to see your Amazon too. Okay. Dude, it is literally so stupid. It is the stupidest disagreement I've had on the show, a coffee cart. What the fuck? Everything.

Starting point is 01:15:11 We've had cheaters. We've had abusers. We've had everything. And it's a coffee cart. That is. causing this issue, guys. It's so stupid. So it should be easier?

Starting point is 01:15:21 It's the dumbest thing for you guys to argue about. I don't understand. It's don't get into it or do. Just like, come on, it's a hobby. That could be a big business one day. Could be, but it's not. And you guys don't make money. So just shut the fuck up.

Starting point is 01:15:36 Yes, 36% interest. There you go. Figured it out. You just don't look at shit and you do it. So the big business could be someday. No, you're a big business for a firm. Okay, that's what you're a big business for. You don't even look at the shit you're doing.

Starting point is 01:15:50 There's 18 things in her cart. That I'm not going to buy. Then why is it in your cart? Oh, it's a that I might want to buy. You didn't look at the interest? That you might want to buy at 36% interest because you just look at the interest. I saw the total price that it gives. So it was like $26 extra, like things like that.

Starting point is 01:16:06 Yeah, spending so much shit on the business on here. But it says, listen, you're putting so much money in this business on Amazon a firm. Here's your things from the Amazon cart. A lot of us with business. a lot of it's not as well, but a lot of it is. And it's just so much stupid business. Here's her very, guys, her super special nobody else does it. I have not seen anybody else.

Starting point is 01:16:26 Her special little sauce is a sauce from just Amazon that she gets that anyone else can get. But they don't. So she's not like homemaking and or like what the... Or they don't. They don't. That's why it doesn't have like 500, five-star reviews. Fuck you. Yes, people are getting her.

Starting point is 01:16:42 Shut the fuck off. What are you talking about? I haven't seen any other coffee shops do a cageta drink. Girl, you live in a town with two restaurants. No shit you're not seeing people do. Okay, so go to the coffee shop right down the street then and somebody that they have it. Yeah, they don't have it. They, a singular coffee shop that I pick up?

Starting point is 01:16:57 Yeah. Like many, I've been doing a lot of research. Not many people do the cageta. It doesn't matter. It's just a flavor, okay? What's it called? Cajeta. Cajeta.

Starting point is 01:17:09 Cajeta mamata. Camada. Camada. That's what the flavor is called? No, my, well, yeah. Cajeta, period. Oh, there it is. Let's see.

Starting point is 01:17:21 Okay. In the area, there's Mniani Coffee, Damme Cafe, Veracruz, All Natural, which, by the way, that's not even like a... That places is a chain. Brew at home. Yeah, no, shut up. It's everywhere.

Starting point is 01:17:34 Okay. Girl, you're in Texas. It's everywhere. You are what Texas looks like. Not me, you. So don't... You can't see... did your research. We just did that in two seconds.

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Starting point is 01:19:32 when it comes to private data. That's why I like dollar wise, built by these people just like you, for people just like you. No private equity, no private equity, no private. gimmicks, just the best budgeting app there is. Download it now, start the free trial, dollar wise.com. Link in the description below. Okay, that was bought on Amazon. No, that wasn't a syrup. Like my actual syrups are homemade. Oh my goodness. Uh-huh. One main financial. What's

Starting point is 01:19:59 going on with this guys? Um, before. This is insane. This is $18,791. All the debt we had before we got married and we had actually paid a lot of it off. And it doesn't make any sense. I don't understand doing that. Listen, we have personal loans with incredible rates and everything at Calebhammer.com because I like good debt. But it doesn't make sense for people like you to get into and that's what I preach. I like credit cards, but not for you. You're not credit card people. This makes no sense. Why consolidated debt if you're not going to fix your behavior? Because then you're just going to end up with double the debt. Yeah. At the time, we were truck driving. Oh, I was still truck driving. So consolidating, we had gotten better at paying off debt. We had actually

Starting point is 01:20:37 a little better, but I haven't fully fixed the behavior. Right. We didn't fully fix it, but we thought it was the right option to do at the time because we would just knock that out quickly. So why if we have this high, insane minimum payment, high balance, probably bad interest rate? Oh, really bad interest rate. Basically a credit card to 24%. If we have this, why the fuck can we open businesses that don't make money and invest in money and businesses and that investment, by the way, is all on 20, 34% interest, 36% interest rate debt? Why are we doing that if we can't even pay off the previous consolation?

Starting point is 01:21:10 consolidation, huh? Can someone answer that? We can't even pay off the previous consolidation so we take out an investment in a business at 36, 36% interest. That doesn't make a penny. Huh? That is a good question. Huh? Does anyone have an answer? There are an logical conclusion here. No, there isn't. Where is it? Tell me, please, I can't find it. I think, um, we were desperately trying to figure out what to do in order to fix things. That's not the answer. That's not the answer. Why? No, no, no, no, no. If you're desperately trying to figure it out, why is the answer take out a 36% interest rate debt on something that makes zero dollars, please? Building a business. Instead of like, well, there is building a business which takes money of which you did a 36% interest debt.

Starting point is 01:21:49 That is an option out there. There is like another option called get a f*** job. I tried. You tried? No one hired you? Literally. Okay. Go to another town.

Starting point is 01:21:59 You guys bought in a town that has your opportunity because you guys are freaks. I was applying to jobs in the towns that were like an hour away. Okay. Then you have to move. somewhere. You have to move to DFW or something. You have to move to places without for duty. I applied for jobs in the DFW and nothing. Okay, then you're a broken individual

Starting point is 01:22:14 or your resume is completely broken and you just need to help. Probably. Okay, everywhere. Dude, civil goat has it and there's civil goats all over Austin. Cafe Java has it. Plaza Colombian coffee here has it. Dame Cafe has it. Well, good thing we don't sell it. Austin then, okay?

Starting point is 01:22:31 But that's the thing. You're saying no one has it and that's just a little part. Austin is the Dude, even Fort Worth has higher population than Austin. Yeah. This is a basic thing. Yeah. San Antonio, Houston, Dallas, Fort Worth, all larger population cities than Austin.

Starting point is 01:22:51 Right, but we don't live anywhere near those places. No, it's an example because you said no one else does it. Yes, even here in a smaller city, everyone else does it. Okay. So up near you, yes, there are places you are not special. How much was the church willing to make? In an area. I was going to be 21 an hour.

Starting point is 01:23:07 Why don't you get that job? It was part time. Good. That's what you need. You need a part-time job on top of what you're doing instead of starting this business. That was the goal and I was told not to take it. By him? We just went over how I didn't tell you not to take it.

Starting point is 01:23:20 He didn't say that. He didn't say that. Come on, we did go through that. So does it make sense? You're literally your thing that was making zero dollars. You took out a lot of debt for. So it's like obviously getting a job would be better than that. That was the only job in this entire time that I got.

Starting point is 01:23:34 Nope. Actually, you've made negative money, so nope. You made negative money. I went to work as a delivery driver in a pizza place because there was nobody else hiring me. Perfect. That's a job. Do that. Yeah, I did that. And now I'm getting more money than I was doing that. No, you'd be doing that in adjacent to what you're doing now. No coffee shop. Again, her choice was take out 36% interest rate debt on something that doesn't make any money. Deliver pizza. Deliver pizza makes money. I would deliver pizza.

Starting point is 01:24:04 Paterly is still more money than debt. I don't understand how can you not understand that? I don't understand how you don't see that. I'm still working a full-time job like I was. But instead of the coffee- I'm doing the- I'm saying you keep the full-time job here and instead of getting the coffee cart,

Starting point is 01:24:22 you get the part-time job. It's not against your full-time job. How many hours a week you're working? Not the coffee. It varies. It's lately it's been, I do double-ships. most of the time.

Starting point is 01:24:35 Five, six days a week. How much? What is that like? 50. Let's say 50, 60. 50 to 60 hours a week. Dude, then you're 50 to 60 hours a week? No, I don't think that's because you're only working.

Starting point is 01:24:49 You're not even working the full days. So you make it 60? I am working full days. I'm working two of them are like full days and then the rest of the days are. So you're making $8 an hour? It's, I work on tips. On average, you're making $8 an hour? Then you need to go.

Starting point is 01:25:02 Guys, you have to move somewhere. There is just a certain, there is a reality and it's capitalism. It's socialism too because it's still connected with it. It doesn't matter. That town's not entitled to have you. You're not entitled to have that town. You need to move some more with the opportunities. That's the reality.

Starting point is 01:25:14 Yeah. That's it. But that means he leaves. He makes no money. I don't give a... He'll go find literally a high school job in any large metro that it will pay him double. And Texas? That's fine.

Starting point is 01:25:28 Once he gets to the point where he has a certification and stuff. He's in a D2 bullshit. He can go... But that's not. not like my issue. My issue is I just feel like I can't rely on you to do what you need to do in order to take care of your side of being a grown up. I have been taking care of my side. Bills have been getting paid.

Starting point is 01:25:44 You just, we just went over how much the infront. There you go breaking things. Just put it on a magnet. Do you know how magnets work? It's not very sticky. I just didn't think things would be falling apart here. It's not sticky.

Starting point is 01:25:56 We don't know that it's a magnet. It's not sticking. Magnets are not sticky. They're magnets. I don't know what's a magnet. So we just went over how you took out all of that money on a firm for your business. Yeah. So I think that shows that I can't rely on you on terms of how the money is being spent.

Starting point is 01:26:15 I trusted that you had it under control or knew what you were doing with that. I guess, I mean, I should have asked more questions whenever you said that you didn't have much more money left in a firm or you had so much in a firm. But that's my fault for not asking. but I didn't think that over $3,000 wasn't in firm, not to mention the interest rate that was on top of that. I showed you everything I've done for the business.

Starting point is 01:26:43 I asked you multiple times how much money was being spent. And I showed you. I literally have shown you. Sapphire preferred. What is this? What's going on? The leftover from that is pretty much what's left over from our wedding. Put a wedding on. Guys, you don't do anything else. It still takes six years to pay off if you do minimum payments. Now, you do a little more than that, which I don't even know

Starting point is 01:27:00 if that's the right strategy when we have other things to pay off that are worse, i.e. affirm, higher interest rate and lower balances. It makes sense to pay them off in both the avalanche and snowball method. So this makes no sense. But interest is accruing at $34.56. You owe $1,540 and $9 at a $49 minimum of the payment. You've had, I believe, two latefuses here so far. Yeah. For why? What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Pathetic. That's why I started paying the bills because he would have late fees a lot. Okay, then you're not reliable either. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:27:36 At least I pay the things I need to be paid on time. You are made for each other. Neither of you are reliable in what you do. Just too late payments isn't. Yes, that's extra money that you then owe. I understand it was a mess up, but just saying someone's reliable for just messing up once or twice. But it's happened a lot more than twice. Twice by the time of the fourth month of this year, which is when the statement came in.

Starting point is 01:27:56 Fifth month. So it's like by continue that average. would be at like four or five by the end of the year. Right. And so that's... Except not because you took it over because you're pathetic. Yeah, I just need to... Because you can't manage it. You can't even coach your own life. D2.

Starting point is 01:28:10 I was trying to rely on her to help me out with that. Which I do. I make sure that bills are paid on time. Okay, Freedom Flex. Where are we purchasing on a card that we're only making a minimum fee payment that is a great interest that we cannot pay off? I think no one's mine and it's groceries that I purchase on that card. I think. Brookshires?

Starting point is 01:28:29 Groceries. 14 hours of groceries? That's how little groceries I thought you weren't allowed to get groceries. Probably when he was gone. I mean, it's not a strict rule. It sounded like it. It sounded like there's an extreme like a trust.

Starting point is 01:28:43 Okay, groceries aren't a thing you can't get, but why are you getting the amount of card that you can't pay off that is a Korean interest? That makes no sense. Why make it even get worse? Why didn't you have any money? Where's the money going? It doesn't make any sense.

Starting point is 01:28:52 Bills? Bills. It might have been just, no, I don't know. Well, they're bills. Okay. Or minimums. or like $250 going out to eat unknown shopping in another $250

Starting point is 01:29:05 and necessarily this bullshit at least $100. So potential bullshit, minimum $600, how can you not have any money? There you go. Spend it on bullshit. What the fuck you're talking about? Other large purchases, $745, I don't even know what that is. They could be bullshit, it could be not.

Starting point is 01:29:18 Could be half, who knows. But at least $600 on bullshit. No shit you didn't have any money. Yeah. That's what happens to do to spend money out bullshit. $1,182.51 cents. Higher. the new previous month, because you spent.

Starting point is 01:29:37 Yeah. Doesn't matter if it's for groceries. You chose to put it on there, and it's accruing interest. It can be hundreds by year end. Why don't you guys spend on that wedding that you had to put on a fucking card? Oh, what was it? Oh, you guys have credit one. Of course you do.

Starting point is 01:29:52 That was my first. 15? 15,000. Dude, you guys couldn't afford that to save your lives. At the time we were... For a wedding. It's not even that crazy. You guys just can't afford shit.

Starting point is 01:30:02 At the time, we were... Truck driving. So it wasn't an issue. Yeah, but why are we putting it on debt? Then we're still paying today. Because when we got those credit cards, they had like that special where like we get like 5% so we ended up getting like a thousand...

Starting point is 01:30:14 Sure, but you have to pay off the credit card. Yeah, but you do that, then you pay off the credit card. That's why you guys aren't credit card. If the job stuff like didn't happen, then it would have been paid all for and it would have been... Yeah, there was a plan. We were really good. If we didn't... Speeding tickets relentlessly and run over living things.

Starting point is 01:30:28 Yeah, who would have thought? Okay, credit one, one of the worst credit cards ever, $400. $7.98. $30 minimum of the payment, interest, fees. It's all, yeah, credit one's the worst. Yeah, it was just my first credit one. It was my first credit. That was your first one.

Starting point is 01:30:41 Living the Mexican dream, aren't you? Okay, capital one. Yes. Whose? Mine. Okay, only making the minimum. Right. I also use that for groceries.

Starting point is 01:30:54 Why on an interest accruing card? Because you don't have money, because we spend it all in bullshit. $3.10. $0.98. $25 minimum. on monthly payment. Very low. Interest accruing.

Starting point is 01:31:06 Bullshit. 28.99% interest of death. M. NMF. F-F-M. What is it? At a furniture store? Why? Oh, you guys are just you're everything.

Starting point is 01:31:21 Insurance premium. You got insurance in your seven-year payment plan furniture. Ah! You guys are... I got that when we were separated and I was making... Go to do that. So you should go to Facebook Marketplace regardless. But I...

Starting point is 01:31:36 Guys, your argument for I had money so I could get it yet, you still put it on a credit card. That makes no sense. I paid half of it up front of the purchase I made. I didn't want to keep sleeping on the same bed that we were sharing. $56? I know, you wouldn't really need to or want to, but like when I moved down to Austin after sleeping on an air mattress for six to nine months while I was paying off debts, then I went and got like a $400 hour match.

Starting point is 01:32:02 It's not the greatest thing in the world, but that's what I could afford. Do what you can afford, not what you can't. Could afford it. No, because you put it on a credit card. No, because you put it on a credit card, just like your wedding. No, because you put it on a credit card. Shut the fuck off. $56 a month minimum payment.

Starting point is 01:32:17 Insurance premium on it, $1,254 and 19 cents owed. Is deferred interest accruing? No, you're, uh, greep two. Oh, you're getting interest accruing on it. Oh, because it's deferred and it will hit. Oh, in like two months Hundreds will be added to that balance You guys are f***

Starting point is 01:32:40 And you didn't even know that, did you? No. Of course not. Okay, United Card, what's going on with this? Oh, we're spending on a card that we can't pay off. Is that for Garthoree? No. Oh, great.

Starting point is 01:32:53 Oh, basically max out a 467-69 with the minimum monthly payment of 40 at a $500 limit. What is it? It's a spectrum. We put her utility. on a card that we can't pay off that is accruing in interest? Why pay penalties on your, essentially,

Starting point is 01:33:09 interest on your utilities? Why do that? It's stupid. I thought we were paying that off. Like, I thought that the money for the utilities was going on there, and then we were just turning around paying that. No, not with your $40 minimumity payment. I mean, your utility payment is $65. It's just going up.

Starting point is 01:33:25 Oh, that's where the internet is. And interest accrues on that. And then also this card must have a annual fee of like $219, or you've had late fees or both? I got it canceled. Well, it was supposed to get canceled. We went to the bank to get it canceled and... Nope!

Starting point is 01:33:39 You guys are so irresponsible. You don't follow anything that's happening. It's okay. Care credit. Who's this? Mine. And it should be zero percent interest. Well, so is your furniture thing, but there's deferred interest.

Starting point is 01:33:50 So let's see what happens with this. $3,051.5. What happened? That was I had gotten an invisible line years ago. Oh, my gosh. Years ago. So painful years ago. Four years to pay off.

Starting point is 01:34:03 You've paid interest of $141.4. Yeah. But so there was like two months once I lost my job that I couldn't pay and I made a deal with them. They closed it down and they said it'll be zero percent interest. We have another credit one. Who? Mine. Guys, this debt is extensive. It's both y'all's fault. Don't try to blame each other like you did in the beginning.

Starting point is 01:34:24 You're both. $309.54 with a minimum of the payment of, oh, we're past due. Oh, we're past two three months. That one, they had given me A $30 normal minimum fee payment You owe $99 because you're stupid So we did a thing where The credit protection

Starting point is 01:34:43 The credit protection So they paid for the minimums For the past six months And it was supposed to keep going And it didn't keep going And they didn't tell me that it didn't keep going Why should they have to tell you? Log in, manage your finances

Starting point is 01:34:58 Use dollar wise No, I did I call them and I said Hey like can we get I need I continue to need to The help. And they said yes, that it was going to continue to happen. And it didn't. Who has $52,142 to student loans?

Starting point is 01:35:12 Why are you only out of $56 a month? That's just going to accrue inches forever. You're never going to pay that off. Yeah, I know. Probably income base because you have no income because you're D2. Yeah. That's exactly. It's on income base.

Starting point is 01:35:25 And so I was making a chunk, a dense into it. We're bleeping at. What school do you work at? Never heard of that. So part of the reason why, like, it's so much is that I... Why would they go D1? It's a money suck. Kids are paying more for their college so they can be D1 and fail at everything.

Starting point is 01:35:47 It makes no sense. So stupid. So what degree did you get? Communications and then a minor in kinesiology. Sure. Why not? $52,149.69. $69.

Starting point is 01:35:59 Nenit monthly payment, of course. Only... More interest accrues almost. You are more interest accrues in 10 days on this loan than you make on a minimum of the payment. Your minimum is $56.28. Income-based stupid. That's, of course, pathetic.

Starting point is 01:36:21 Yeah, you literally just went D1. That's crazy. The Southland Conference. I've never heard that in my life. Are they the worst conference in D1? They have to be. No, there's lots. there's lots of conferences in D1.

Starting point is 01:36:37 Are they the worst conference in D1? No, I don't think so. I mean, there's lots. It has to be. No, there's plenty of other worse ones. Conferences? I think of like 10 conferences. No, there's lots.

Starting point is 01:36:48 There's lots of major. Well, I'm just thinking about the sports that matter. Sure. Football, hockey, baseball, basketball. Maybe soccer. Soccer. So of the ones that matter, there's like football has power five.

Starting point is 01:37:04 really power four now, really power two actually. And then the group of five, of which the Southland does not exist. Right. So, I mean, in terms of those, then yes, they're way worse than all of those. Oh, shit, that's brutal because, like, I went to a group of five school and they weren't good. Yeah. Great at hockey. Decent at soccer, really bad at football. But you're telling me you're worse than them. Good luck. Why the fucking kids having to pay more for that shit? That's pathetic.

Starting point is 01:37:34 the Chase checking account. Mine? Dude, you're literally negative $317. You started negative $15. Divorces, man. This is the worst thing. What checking account has ever

Starting point is 01:37:45 ended with negative $317 on the show? That's crazy. Is that mine? Or is yours? No, not mine. Guys, this is insane. Bullshit, something closet,

Starting point is 01:37:58 Ace Hardware, Zelling out money. This is... That's mine then. Reacre, Netflix, Zell. Zell, Zell. Oh, that's you. Apple.

Starting point is 01:38:08 Is that mine? Oh, you're the... Divorce her. Appleville. Home Depot, Ross, stores, marshals, bullshit. Affirm, affirm, affirm, affirm. That's mine. Home Depot.

Starting point is 01:38:22 Restaurant. Fang Cha. Firm. Amazon. Affirm. Bullshit. Stupid. Affirm. Reoccurring.

Starting point is 01:38:30 Apple. Start a negative end and more negative. El. Some bullshit. You overdrafted like 30 times this year. This is insane. Your chase, not even much better. Started with 6 bucks ended with 55.

Starting point is 01:38:43 Or actually, nope, that was her savings. Went from 6 bucks to 55, even though she's overdrafting and losing all benefit. Your checking account ended with $23. Not much better. Amazon. Amazon. I think, let's, you talk about the payments? Like what the charges?

Starting point is 01:39:02 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Why? Why exactly seven weeks ago? Is there a $40 payment to divorce service? No, because it was on a monthly payment plan. Oh, that's your previous. Peacock, Marketplace, Cable, AMC, bullshit, Sonic driving, midnight craving.

Starting point is 01:39:29 At least he's not going negative, but you're still spending all your money in bullshit. Stopping in and getting some bullshit. Probably some energy drinks. gamer substance that it tastes better, I promise. Amazon, Affirm, Zell. So stupid, dude. What? Oh, a car?

Starting point is 01:39:48 Yeah, that's her car. What is it? It's a GMC terrain, 2016. A 15% interest rate? No. Yes? No, that's paid off. What's the interest?

Starting point is 01:39:58 Yeah, no interest. So this is like to a family? A friend, yeah. Great. $5,950. Minimum payment, you see. sometimes do 250, 200, 300, 300, 300? Okay.

Starting point is 01:40:14 Fucking stupid. Good death. Collections, $30,000? Yeah. For something? A car? Yeah. You got repo?

Starting point is 01:40:28 Mm-hmm. Two repos. Of course you guys did. You're made for each other. City. Yeah. So 30,000 repo is insane. That's just one.

Starting point is 01:40:40 What's your other repo? Oh, both of them are under him. $5.59. Yeah, both of them are under him. Well, here's the mortgage. You had a 7.3% interest rate. Jeez. Yeah, I would sell this.

Starting point is 01:40:52 You'd get a lower rate anyway. Well, maybe not with your guys credit. $172,657. What's the house worth? We bought it for $179. Monthly payment, $1,751. FHA. All right, guys.

Starting point is 01:41:08 So even if we wanted to sell a weekend until next year, because we got to wait three years. years, otherwise we pay the minimum. Why do you guys do that? Why harm yourselves with the home purchase? Americans' obsessions hurt them constantly. It's so stupid. Makes no sense.

Starting point is 01:41:24 You guys are financial morons. I'm so done. I'm so fucking done. So income. Oh, your side jab doesn't count 4,100. All right, let's get these debts. Obviously, we know the mortgage. That is 1,751.

Starting point is 01:41:40 Collections nothing. could sue you for that, should sue you for that. You know, they'll garnish your wages potentially. I'll get a court order. Seeing more and more of that. On the Caleb Hammer Show link below. People are loving that. We thought that their like insurance or whatever

Starting point is 01:41:55 took care of that when cars get repoed and it just like shits on the credit and disappears. No? As far as I know, I don't know what you're talking about. Is there something I'm missing here? something different happened that I wasn't aware of No, my thought was we can barely afford it as is So we had to do something to get rid of it

Starting point is 01:42:19 And I'm going to follow up with them to see what I need to do To like do like low monthly payments Because it was What's your gas electric utilities, everything combined? 300 300 to 400 300, yeah, 350 Okay Phone bill

Starting point is 01:42:39 375 What's the wrong with you guys Once you pay off your phone Switch the helium If team mobile is good in your area It follows that same kind of service But that's with your family and everything right? Yeah

Starting point is 01:42:50 Well, do they pay you? Oh my goodness Call When I can't pay it Gas and broomfroom drive drive How much? It ends up being about 60 a week

Starting point is 01:43:01 No not even Do 50 a week Because we don't drive that much 250? 50 a week Oh okay 200 bucks car insurance 163?

Starting point is 01:43:13 Guys, your house is literally worth what you bought. You would have to write a check to sell your house even after the three-year thing. Okay, necessary food, $600, use the meal plan, use the meal prep that's based on HGP pricing, it's perfectly fine, Walmart, all that good stuff works,

Starting point is 01:43:29 TP fine, anything else need to survive total paper toothbrush, changes every single month what the category is for, but it is $200. Medical, health care, their co-pays, monthly basis. Oh, yeah, so it goes through his... What's the co-pays on a monthly basis? basis. Right now, for a limited time, everyone's part of the Buick team, even you. Buick's employee

Starting point is 01:43:47 pricing for you event is on now. Get a purchase credit of up to $3,168 on a 2026 Buick Envision. Surround yourself with signature Buick refinement from an available massaging driver's seat to an expansive panoramic moonroof and a stunning ultra-wide 30-inch diagonal screen. Don't miss Buick's employee pricing for you event. Visit buick.com.ca for more detail. 20? Well, Jim? Is there a gym? No.

Starting point is 01:44:15 Okay, subscriptions. I'll try to give 40 bucks. You have any pets? Yes, two. What? Two more kibouge. $100 pet insurance. How much for pet food?

Starting point is 01:44:26 50 a month. Okay. Anything else that needs to be in this budget that I have not taken an account for? If you guys even break even, I will be so fucking surprised. If you do, these are some big numbers. Ooh, this is big numbers.

Starting point is 01:44:44 We've considered bankruptcy. Well, that literally might be the only option. Yeah, you guys are underwater by $1,400 a month, $1,300. No, not bankruptcy, unless you can follow your budget and actually prove you change your behavior for at least a quarter for three months. If not, you'll end up back here on the show again in two years. We've seen it before from other bankruptcy, people. Oh, yeah.

Starting point is 01:45:08 We've seen it before. You're not special. So you have to change your behavior. or some consolidations. Those work too, but you got to change your behavior first. Or better yet, listen, even just renting somewhere cheap and at place with opportunities while you pay you on this mortgage for a year, then cut your loss, learn the lesson, and literally just go make as a household 8,000 hours a month because you too easily can.

Starting point is 01:45:32 And you'll be fine. You'll be able to pay off the stat a few years. And then shut the fuck up and don't make these mistakes again. you guys live in the literal middle of nowhere. Tyler is the closest large town, but I have your address pulled up and you're literally nowhere. Like, you have to move to a place with opportunity.

Starting point is 01:45:54 It's just the reality of the situation. This is pathetic. That's it, guys. That's it. Hammer financial score. This is, you guys are... Spending in a budget, you overspent, zero out of ten. There's collections, zero out of ten.

Starting point is 01:46:08 There's nothing. Zero out of ten. I didn't see anything zero out of ten. Real estate, least you have something, but it's break-even. You have no equity position. You would have to, at least you're in the market. That's what matters, but it is still not great. Three out of ten.

Starting point is 01:46:21 It's the only thing that's going to give you anything and not be a zero. Hammer financial score rounded up just barely one out of ten. Get yours at Calebhammer.com. Join us for the post show. There's some interesting things we're going to talk about. Listen, 120,000 active members for a reason. Three premium shows every single day. Six days a week.

Starting point is 01:46:36 It is the best there is. Click join to join here on YouTube. or you can go on the Hammer Elite app or Hammerelit.com, wherever you want to be, same membership in all places. Love you, seeing the Post Show. Show me a resume. I thought it was a great resume. Everybody, I showed you were a great resume.

Starting point is 01:46:50 Dude, she's a, she's a server. She has a two-page resume. No, but that... How can you tell me you think this is a good resume? I just started as a server. I haven't been a server before. Shut the fuck up. You should have a one-page resume.

Starting point is 01:47:01 Okay. You're not a C-suite. That's one of the most hilarious resumes. That was almost worse than Brent's. I just launched the brand new Hammer Elite app available on. every major platform. So you can watch every show anywhere you want. You'll get three exclusive dedicated shows every single day, Monday through Saturday. Refer a friend after you sign up,

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Financial Audit - I Hate His B*tch Wife | Financial Audit

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