Financial Audit - Most Batsh*t Insane Woman I’ve Ever Met | Financial Audit

Episode Date: September 8, 2025

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My boyfriend is in jail. You want a fucking convict from multiple states to be in your life forever. Yes. He is going to drag you down. Do you not see? My ultimate dream is to just like sit under a tree and philosophize about life. Oh, fuck. You're never going to make money.

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changed their lives and joined Dollar Wise Central right now for free. Hi, my name is Apricot. I'm 31 years old, and I'm from Santa Clarita, California. And this is financial audit. Yes, it is. Thanks for coming over to Austin. What do you do, Apricot for a living? Sancterrida. I, uh, I, I door dashed. and I Uber Eats and... So much of that on this show. So curious. So I am from Santa Clarita, but I am actually living in a town in Arizona right now.

That, yeah. This entire pre-interview part, talking about where do you live? Where are you from? What are you doing? Santa Cruz, Santa Cruz. Immediately starts the episode. I live in Santa Cruz, in the intro.

And then you start... Okay, so you're in Arizona. Yes, I'm in Arizona currently. Why don't we... Talk about that for the last 10 minutes. Okay. Where are you? you in Arizona. Let me cross out

Santa Clarita because I really care about where you're born. I live in Lake Havasu City. Lake Kavisu? Lake Havasu. Okay, I'm honestly not familiar, but okay. So you, DoorDash and Uber Eats and Lake Kavisu, yeah.

Yes, correct. DoorDash, Uber Eats, Grubhub, Instagram, you name it. Okay, why the grind? Why the grind instead of a... I really like having money and I would like to get a regular job. I care for my elderly grandparents there. It's like temporary. This makes it easier to care for them?

I guess timewise. But I need money still to pay my bills. Why aren't you working a job then? I'm sorry? Oh, because I have to be there to cook all their food and to clean up and to be there for appointments. Appointments, I can understand that. But meal prep and cleaning the house we can do outside of the hours.

What's their age and health? They are 76 and 77. What's the thing you're having? to take care of that they're incapable of. Oh, this is a literal nothing town in the literal middle of nowhere. It is more in the middle of nowhere than Vegas. I kind of hate it. Well, no, who would?

It's in the middle of Vegas and Phoenix. And both of those cities are in the middle of nowhere. That's how in the middle and nowhere this is. Yeah. Yeah. A little waste is in the middle of the desert. Okay. Yeah.

Okay. Then how they, so they're unable to move? Correct. Yes, my grandma's in a wheelchair and my grandpa has a fib, so he's not able to, like, move around. So appointments, sure. How often is appointments? Because we've got to get you in a job. Are you, or is your entire, who was taking care of them before you?

What are you doing? They just started needing help this year. They asked me to come in. And it was only you. You're the only available person. You can't split it with anyone. I cannot. I split it, like right now, my aunt, my grandma.

Grandpa's sisters are taking care of them. But she... Well, and they wanted to stay in the home, I'm assuming. For... Yeah, so she stays there when I'm gone. But it's not... No, no, no. Your grandparents wanted to stay in their home. Oh, yes. Correct.

Okay, which means in order for them to stay in their home, and even though this is oversimplifying it, for sure, but them staying in their home is preventing their grandchild at 31. From being able to live her own life. You moved from Santa Clarita? Yes, yes. Okay. Okay. I mean, honestly, I appreciate the empathy part that we're setting off off the gate, but I am also being told information from people who know you much more than I do, because I am just meeting you right now, having my very first conversation right now, that you actually are just trying to build the social media online following because you hate working and you want to be an influencer. Good news, she can't plug her here and she's actually using a fake name, so good luck with that. But also, I feel like that's more of the problem. play that you hate working i.e. everything they learned about you before this, then you're just

taking care of your grandparents and you have to take them to appointments a couple times a month. Well, another reason I don't have a job is because I... You have a job. Well, you're doing contractor things. We don't allow people without jobs on. She is working. Yes, this is true. Independent. The reason that I don't work for a corporation with set hours, I've been having to travel a lot recently, too. So I started looking... How do you mix those? I'm not allowed to do anything because I have to take care of the house and cook and take them appointments. But I also travel a lot.

Yes. Okay. I feel like I'm getting received the mixed signals here. See the mixed signals. So I have another family member who's ill. And I have been traveling back to California to be with them while they've been hospitalized. You're not the, well, they've been hospitalized. So it's more just to see them.

Yeah. Well, it's my dad. So it's hard to. to not want to be there for him. Which is fair. With my grandparents, they understand, and we can get my great aunt into the home to help with meals and appointments. If more people can come into the home, then you need to leave the oasis and you need to go back to Santa Corridor.

So that would be ideal. We're trying to figure that out right now. That does not address the fact that through the conversations with you, producers have pretty much determined that you just do not like working, though. I have always worked and held jobs. But in recent years, I think that there's like an nihilistic point of view where I'm like, what is the point of anything? Well, the point of anything is being able to at least be able to pay your bills and not get evicted and being able to live a pretty, you know, good, dignified life.

Right. Yeah. That's usually a good minimum baseline. The people that are just all, what is it, black pill, brown pill, doom pill, that are doom, doom, doom, doom, gloom, gloom, gloom, gloom, gloom, you're never going to get anywhere and not going to do anything. And you're going to come begging for money from everyone. So I would rather you be just someone with some kind of ambition, some desire to do better in this world. Yeah, it's there.

You know, I have, I have big dreams, but it's. What are our big dreams? I want to be an author and I want to travel a lot for myself and see the world. What authoring are you doing? Right now? Nothing. And I want to be. How do you become an author if you've never authored?

I know, right? No, no, that was my question. I have a big problem with procrastination. That's not procrastinating. It's 30. You're 31. Yeah. So I'm putting it off. Zero. Yeah. This video is sponsored by ORA.

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Well, this is true. I'm in school for... You're in school, too. Okay, so it's only... Okay. Are we... We're going to be 30 minutes in and we're going to be learning also

about what you're still doing right now as well because you're doing only a thousand things. What's the school situation, please? I've got an associates in English and an associates in psychology. You said you're in school. Yeah, and I'm working on a bachelor's degree in English. So...

Okay. Why can't it be in something that will get you a job? You can be a writer without a English. degree. I know. I like to learn about it, though, so that I can... You can learn about it without going into... I'm really bad about, I'm really bad without a structure, like a formal structure. I'm not good at I'm not a self-starter. Yeah, but even online classes can be cheaper that you can take like horses from some author that's been very successful or something. I don't know. That's a good point for

my bachelor's, but the, uh, the associates were paid for by FAFSA. So they were free classes too. I don't see that happening for what you do. doing right now. No, it's not. I have loans out. Okay, then I wasn't advocating against not using free school. I know. I'm just saying like up to this point it has been free. But it's not right now, which is all that matters. Okay. I see what you're saying. What are you doing? You're doing everything but nothing. You're not getting anywhere. I know. It's like the story of my life. You've done two associates, well, then change your life. You've done two associates degree. You're getting a bachelor degree and a worthless degree. And actually, I'm hearing that you've actually recently failed some classes. So is it just

the structured thing that you need? Because even in structure, oh, oh, she's failing. You're using your grandparents as an excuse to honestly do what you're doing. And your dad's past, you know, or is ill, I don't know. And that is sad. And I do want you to be able to go back home. But if there are all these people that are able to step in as much as you're suggesting they are for the grandparent situation, and honestly, they're just not wanting to leave their own home. You should not be the one delaying your entire life for that. listen, the people that are coming in to help, like your aunt and whatnot, are do they live in that small town? It's just my aunt.

Do they live in that small town? No, she doesn't. Okay. Well, at least that's their daughter, not their granddaughter. What are they trying to do? It's my grandpa's sister, so she's just as old as they are. And it's not easy because she has her own household to run where she lives. So it's like when I need to leave, I have to ask her to come, and it's an ordeal for everyone.

and as far as not living in the home. Okay, if the grandparents want to, you know, not go to any kind of home or whatever. I'm sure I don't know what their retirement situation is. I don't know what their social security situation is, Medicaid, all that good stuff. Or sorry, Medicare. But, okay, cool.

So if they're not going anywhere, if they don't have anywhere set up for success, in order to have your life actually working in a town where you're able to get into a career and they don't want to go into anything like that, then they need to move to Santa Clarita with you. I think that they'll move to Oregon eventually and sell where they're. I've been telling them this. What does that?

Okay. I'm just saying. Like they have. And you're going to Oregon with them? I might. I, I, I, I, I, I, who's in Oregon? Um, they have another home there and my,

my grandpa's sons. He has, I have two uncles there. Okay, then make them do that. You're not putting your entire life on hold on. Honestly, you're probably allowing them to stay there longer when they shouldn't be. Okay. All right.

So, but, okay, with that being said, like, my real aspirations remain as like content creating or anything author author i just want anything so you are just you want you don't want to have a job is what you're saying you're thinking them is easier my ultimate dream is to just like sit under a tree and philosophize about life when i'm older and have people want to hear what i say and that's what i want to be an author for too is but i want to travel for that you're never going to make money i know right it's like it's like it's like it's like i'm playing the game of life and a long time ago i chose the career path of a starving artist That's how I feel.

No, you don't have to be a moron. You don't have to be. This is your, you're choosing that. Listen, if you're recognizing it's wrong, then read me something you've written. Something brief. Let's see these philosophy skills in action. Okay, so this is something that was written because I was, I don't even know why I wrote this. Like the choice of taking your phone somewhere or not to take, like say you're moving,

How about let's just read it? Okay. I'll read it. No. Give. But it says it says about. Okay. Oh, fuck.

Yeah. The choice of taking your phone to the bathroom or not is whether the phone rings. What I meant to say is that, okay, you make a choice and then what happens next could be coincidence. I feel like I'm losing my mind slowly. What is reality? Where do I lie? Hmm. I feel like I could cry.

I could cry right now, too. No, I'm just kidding. Does it continue? Probably not. Probably not. Look, it's just random stuff. I don't even know who wrote this. This is like my mind and diary.

And I just brought this to take. Wow, this is explaining why the stack of financial debt and documents are this thick. I just brought this to take notes. phone in the bathroom book. By the way, whether or not I bring a phone into the bath. Bringing a phone into the bathroom is gross. What are you sh-in your hands? No, I'm just saying.

It's like, I don't know. I think about how often. Scoop and doo-doo with the fingers? No. What's nasty? Why, you fucking splash pissing everywhere? No, but vapor. Anyway.

Vapor? It's neither here nor there. Well, preferably just not on your hands. My goodness. My goodness. Is it slam poetry? Send me up. You're starting?

That's what I'm saying. This is my, anyway. Whether or not I choose to bring my phone into the bathroom is not whether it rings. No, it's like the choice to bring it or not would depend on if it's going to ring or not and who's calling. And why are you care about calling? No, it's because I want to be on Twitter while I'm taking it. Well, to each their own, right? It's for different reasons.

This is like a personal point of view. This is just something I jotted down. Very good. So that is your... It's not even a good example. Self-reflections by Apricot. That's chapter one? Chapter seven.

There are more chapters before. Okay. The producers are saying it gives 13-year-old girl. I agree. Yeah, you are 31, which is unfortunate. It's reversed. That's a caretaker. Okay.

All right, so what is your living situation right now? I got to know. I'm living with my grandparents. I pay them a little bit of rent, but... You pay them rent and you're their caretaker. A little bit, but they... No, I think they're taking care of you. I agree, first of all.

Oh, there, okay, there it is. But... There it is. We've uncovered the truth, ladies and gentlemen. I know. Can you flip to just a random page? Just flip a random page. There you go.

A random page in the written section, you tit. Why? Just a random page. I regret bringing this now. No, just random page. No, I said flip through a random page. Uh, it's in, you can't read it though. Why?

Okay, here. Okay, show me. Random page. Oh, boy. What is it even? She was counting down the days of the month while also keeping her tally of something. Oh, there's a camera up there. There sure is.

And this is seeing something concerning of like a prisoner. Oh, my God. You guessed it right. That is, I was counting down the days until the. No, not me. That's really crazy that you just count it. What? My boyfriend is in jail.

Tata. Anyway, so yeah, I was counting down the days until his release and it was inaccurate anyway. I have a picture to show you if you want. That's okay. Actually, yes, of course. Right now? Please. Okay.

Can it be on camera? Yep. Okay. We got permission. Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, this financial audit will start soon. first of all he's grain how old is he well you're 31 it's okay he's 25 i just keep assuming you're 15 he's what's he in jail for a lot of stuff what are you counting down because the countdown has ended according to this uh yeah that was when he was in jail in california and now he's in jail

in arkansas i thought he was going to get released and he didn't he got extra what are you what is actually happening in your life i know how did we get here no it's a question that i asked that you should answer i don't have answers for you kate I'm here to find it out. You can't tell me why you're dating him? I'm dating him because he is nice to me and he does everything he can for me. How long did you, were you with him before he went to jail? Like a year and a half.

Actually. Yeah. Dating. It was very tumultuous. Yes, in person. In person dating before he went to prison. Correct. Wild times.

Wild times. Okay. I have notes that he did not call you his girlfriend until he went to prison. Um. It's complicated. That just sounds like he didn't consider you his girlfriend. He does consider me his girlfriend. Well, now that it is in prison.

And he did before then, too. He just is. Why do we have notes that you said? Yeah, that's true. What you guys mean? Because he had this whole thing with like. What did you guys meet? At work.

We were working together. What was work? At fast food. At fast food. My favorite restaurant. Jack in the box. Listen, you have 20,000 hours of bad debt. the fuck is going around here.

I know. This is, no, no, no, no. You are the answerer of the questions. You keep agreeing with my question. I have the same questions. So what was the question? Oh, my, okay. So you're a living situation.

I'm still trying to just understand this. I'm trying to get the fucking baseline of your existence. So as we go through these documents, I'm able to connect some fucking dots. Actually give you some kind of path. Okay. Total debt, by the way, $46,000. But, oh, a lot of that is

collections as well. We got federal student loans and oh my gosh, charge, okay, we're fucked. Okay, this is going to be a, this is going to be hard. Okay. So you have a room there? No. I, I, what are you laughing at that? You don't get your own room at the place that you're honestly being taken care of if we're being honest. Yeah, I do think that they take care of me, but I know that I also, uh, I, I, it's a mutual thing. Yeah, okay. Basically, yeah. But you don't have a room?

No. I, so, where do you live there? When I first got there, we weren't sure how much help my grandma was going to need because she's in a wheelchair and she had never been in a wheelchair before. So like, does she need help with the bathroom? Does she need help with everything? And there were episodes in the middle of the night where she would wake up sometimes not being able to breathe. So they put me in the same room as her. And it's a smaller house anyway. So my grandpa's staying in his own room.

I'm in a room with my grandma. But because she has tendencies that are like not comfortable, I have, I sleep on the floor in their closet. They have a walking closet. What's the tendency? She keeps all the lights on. She has Fox News playing 24-7. It never goes off. It's so ridiculous. I can't, I feel like I'm being brainwashed slowly. It's definitely not conducive for my own, like, mental health. They try really hard, though. They're very sweet and good people. But yes, I'm sleeping in a closet. And I've made it as comfortable as I can, but it is detrimental to my overall health. Have you ever been an adult in your life once? Yes. Yes.

I've lived, I moved out of my dad's house when I was 19. Until what? Since then, I've been. You live in a closet of your grandma's house. What did you live at 19? I moved into a room and I rented a room. A room with who and where and what? Like the first house I lived in was actually like,

like a little guest house kind of thing on someone else's property, just random person. Just random person. Oh, okay. Just landlord. And then after that, I moved. I have a long history of moving. Don't need all that, but I just feel like. But I have, I've usually, I usually live on my own renting my own space with a job.

That's typically how I live. But even when I live like that, my financial tendencies are very bad. Yeah, we know you have a lot of debt. How much of it goes into prison? At this point, probably like $200 a month. Okay. What are you making? I never even got that from your hustling.

The door dashing. Yes, yes, yes. So I'll make like at least $100 a day. And how many days are you working? I'll try to work seven days a week when I can. Okay, so $700 a week. We're going on times it by 52, divided by it at 12. But I don't work every week, though.

So let's cut that in half. I work every day, but I don't have work every week. Well, listen, so I work every day when I can. When I'm at home, when I'm with my grandparents, I work every day. But when I leave to go be with my dad, I'm not working. So I'll have like a week and a half. So how many days a month are we working? Probably like 15 to 20.

Hoccal is 17 times 100. Well, that's easy math. But $1,700 a month. before tax, before maintenance. Uh-huh. And they're giving 200 to prison? Yes.

Jail. No, it's not prison? We don't be in jail this long. Yeah, no, he's in jail. Jail, Jail, county jail, jail, jail, city jail. A correctional facility. Prison? I don't think it's prison.

He's in prison. It's like a, they were, so he was in prison. What was he convicted for? Um, like originally or this last time. Let's go both. So originally he was living as an outlaw and he was. But what was he outlawed from? Like, okay, so originally he was living in Arkansas and he was doing bad things with his life, making bad choices.

Sell? I don't know. What was he convicted for? I don't know. He was convicted for criminal mischief and a plethora of other things. Like having stolen goods probably and other things like that. Okay. Anyway, so he was convicted of that.

And then he was sentenced to prison. So he's a felon. And then when I met him, he was living in California on parole. We met at Jack in the Box. And he is... Best place to me. He smoked the... No, I'm just kidding.

I didn't hit the... Anyway, that's what we met. And he was just really sweet. And so then basically he got in trouble again in California. And... For what? Just like lesser extent of use, I guess. Yeah.

Anyway, so he got in trouble for that, and then he got sent to do like a program, and he was released from that program for breaking the rules. And then he absconded his parole. And then he got caught like a year later. How often do you visit? Oh, I don't. That's not cheap, is it?

No, I don't visit him because he's in Arkansas. I mean, we're in Texas right now. So how often do you visit? I, he, so in February this year, everything got really crazy in my life. What? When have you even had a normal in his life? He's in prison. Yeah.

He had a crazier life before that. But, so anyway, he went to jail in February, and he was in California, and I was in Arizona. And I saw him, I think, once when I went to go see my dad once. And then from there, though, he got, what's it called, extradited to Arkansas again? So now he's in Arkansas. And since he's been there, I haven't seen him at all. Okay. Because, hello, this is an expensive trip.

Sure. You make $1,700 a month before expenses or anything whatsoever, including self-employed type taxes and whatnot. Which I totally account for. So what would you say your net is then on a monthly basis? I have no idea. You just said you. I was kidding about the taxes thing. I don't know.

That was a joke. I'm going to have to face it eventually when I file my taxes next year. But until then, until then, I don't know what goes on. And that's like a, it's a me now problem, but future me is going to have to deal with it pretty hard. And ladies and gentlemen, what was her previous job? Well, fuck I just learned. Does they're holding my hand? on this one, because she's a wild, scamming people on PayPal.

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Oh, for fuck, think. And my ex-boyfriend was someone who initiated that kind of. Yeah, but you participated. Yeah, I participated. I know, I know. So, yes, I can't use PayPal because I tried to cheat the system. But it wasn't a job. It just happened that once.

I've never had longer notes. This is a fucking raption. This is crazy. I know. We talked a long time. No, no, no. Oh, quiet. I don't even know what the fuck, man.

I don't even know what the actual... I'm so happy to be sitting here talking to you. I hope it's mutual. Quiet. The world has been a struggle for her. Back in 2021, she left her Parks and Rick job to work at her other grandparents' bed and breakfast. But she moved back to her hometown after that and then picked up a forest shop because she didn't want to be around the rich people. So she worked at the Forest Service, then got fired from her job at the Forest Service for Ghosts.

work after too many mental health days. Oh, here we go. Yeah, TikTok mental diagnosis on this one probably. No. Okay. Incorrect. Okay. No surprise.

She is an astrology girl. Budgeting gives her the ick, by the way. But self-sabotage doesn't. She says that 70 to 80% of her life confusion is tied to money stress. Sometimes she claims money isn't even real. She has a backup plan slash dream though. and that is becoming a writer, a YouTuber, a podcaster, and a singer. Hasn't posted one thing or written a single thing,

and we just went through her slam poetry, by the way. But she wants to do review videos, psychology review videos. Not savings, lives in a closet, all her sisters think she's useless, her grandparents help her out consistently. I thought that was supposed to be your fucking job. One called her a snake in the grass. And the other has her blocked.

It's the same sister, to be fair. And she's... But you think your life has the potential to be a movie. I would say it's just a fucking... Dude, it's like a smut book or something. I don't even know. This is nothing. What is it?

Hentai. She wants to kill to fix her, but only if it doesn't involve much effort. You want to unpack any of that? Because what the fuck did I just read? I mean, that's definitely an over-drimmed. dramatization. Dude, that's the notes in the phone call it had with you.

Yeah. So, uh... Okay. Anyway. I mean, where do you want to start? Any of that? I don't know if you tell me anything, dude. I don't even know because I gotta get in these finances, but you just have such a base

to get through. My sisters are lovely and they love me. We just have been fighting a lot because of what's going on in our family. Well, you're blocked. I was. One calls you a snake in the grass. Yeah, well... Your grandparents take care of you that you're supposed to be taken care of.

and your entire plan out of this is to either be a writer or a YouTuber or a podcast or a singer or do psychology reviews, but haven't posted anything. I'm hoping. And writes about taking a shit with her phone except not unless she has a phone call. Oh my gosh. It's true. I read it. Goodness gracious. It's literally true.

I read it. Literally. Yes. Okay. I read it. I would like help building some kind of a resume. Cool. Astrology is not going to get you there.

Resumet? Yeah. You're just getting fired and leaving everything. What? can I get you? I don't know. That's just my goal. It's one of my goals, okay?

I need to make a better resume for myself to try to. Can I see your resume? I don't have it. How can I help? Maybe I do. Can I try to find it? You sure can. Let's see.

Oh, and the grandparents that help you consistently that you sleep in the closet of that you tell everyone you're actually taking care of. I have a note that also you don't tell anyone how much to take care of you. Um, yeah, like my grandpa will pay for gas while I'm door dashing and stuff. I know it's- You're not there to take care of them. Fuck off with that opening. You kidding me? What a fucking lie.

Quiet. Okay. What a liar. I devote every day, every day to being there consistently for them with whatever they need. I am at their beck and call. I go out to door dash and I do nothing else. I do nothing for myself. I don't go out.

I, the only trips I ever take. 14 times of... The only time I'm ever gone is to go care. I know, to go care for someone else. Yeah, I don't do any... And how much of that care is actually care, knowing what you've set up so far. At least for once, in the history of this world,

her resume is only one page. I appreciate that. Skills. Human communication. Analyzation. 50 words per minute typing. Interpersonal skills. Attentive.

Okay. First of all, 50 words per minute typing. Or you're not fucking... That was just first. specific job that required that. So I... There you go. I was going to say, you're not in...

We're not just writing... I don't know. Like, it's not... You're not in that room with all the women in World War II, right? Yeah. Experience. Prime Mountain Club. Pool attendant.

Current. Not sure if I'm... This is from a couple years ago. Not sure if I'm thrilled to read that. What? Pool attendant? Yes. Okay.

The reason why that was happening. For your resume. I was 22... 29. then, okay, the reason why that was a thing. Same thing. I worked for Starbucks for a long time and I worked. Well, I have Whole Foods.

January 2023 to April 2020. Not great to have on your resume. I had a second job. Not great to work in your resume that you worked somewhere for a couple months. That shows that you leave quick. True. Yet you did it. Because it.

On your resume. Okay. Here we go. Hungary Valley Senior Park Aid, the one we got fired from. I guess we won't say. No, that's not where I got fired from. Oh, admin park aid? Yeah.

That's where you got fired from. No, no, no, no. The place I got, FireTrum isn't on there. Starbucks. I worked at Starbucks for a long time, and then I started working for Parks and Rec, and I was working at Starbucks and the park for a long time, and then I was, I quit Starbucks. Anyway. Be prepared for her summary for her college education.

I am fluent in writing and am able to understand slash analyze written text. Because sometimes people can't. I don't know. Round of applause, please. Hire her immediately. I'm sorry, but come on. That's hilarious. I wouldn't hire someone after someone put that in there

because it's ridiculous. Well, I'll make sure I fix it. Are you trying to say women can't read? No. I'm trying to, I'm just, listen, I have a degree in English. That's all I was trying to showcase. Say you have a degree in English then. Okay.

Not that I am able to understand. slash analyze written text in the ancient English language. I don't know what to say to that. Not a great resume. We can work on improving that. That's fine. It is oddly better, surprisingly, than many people. But your experience is not thrilling.

As soon as I get a better resume, maybe then you'll, maybe then you'll hire me for your show. Okay, shut up. Nope. Not going to, what the fuck would you? Yeah. Join our writing staff for a impromptu random show

where I talk to people. I'm like, what am I going to hire? A copywriter, I guess maybe. Yeah, exactly. You could work for a copyright, except I already have a good one. That's the kind of thing that I think would actually work.

You would never, you will never step foot in this building after we finish this episode. That's so mean. You know, well, I'm being truthful. What about for after, like, to check on me later?

Yeah, you can come back for a follow. Thank you, Caleb. Not for a job, though. I thought you were banning me, though. I thought I was banned. No, no, no. Okay. That's okay.

I'll find other work. Okay, so what came... I don't know. I guess, and you're only going further into debt. Yeah. Okay, total that came in, DoorDash pay was 1,252. I mean, it said 1,700, and that's about what's lining up. Okay, how much did you spend last month?

1,700 came in. Okay, stop clicking with that. Last time. Thank you. Trust me, you're not going to write anything good with it. Ouch. I don't know how much I spent. Why?

Because I don't have an idea? I don't have pay attention. You have to have your grandparents' fucking baby in you and everywhere whatsoever? No. Well, you already do. Nobody knows anything about my finances. Okay. Well, no, no, no.

But they baby you. They pay for your gas while you're out there. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So maybe you should know a little bit about your finances. What do you think you spent based on your knowledge of you just existing? Go back previous month. This is what I was doing.

Let's say $1,500. If I had $17 come in. Okay. $3,200. 142. So obviously you're not going anywhere productive in life whatsoever and you're not going to get anywhere. How would you even be able to move back to Santa Clarita? Is there a place there for you? That's what, okay. The way that it works is like I make goals and plans and like ideas and wants and then eventually like I'll try to. Oh, you sleep in the closet of 31. I'll try to get. Yeah, right. I'll try to get money to do whatever I want to do.

And then I try to make that happen somehow. And then once I get enough for that, I'm like, cool. I have... Spend double what you make. What the fuck? You don't have enough for it. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? Like anything. No, you spend double what you make.

What do you mean? You're saving up and then you get what you want. What are you talking about? Like if I just, okay, I look... It's complicated because... Apparently the reimbursement we're giving you for traveling here. You're using it to go to see your prison boyfriend. That was a plan.

Yeah, because, I mean... It's like a 10-hour drive from here. Usually it's meant to cover people's travel and time they take away from work. Right. So I know. Now, this is a healthy relationship. Let's continue it. Mm-hmm.

So those are my options. These are my options. You want a fucking convict from multiple states to be in your life forever when you're going nowhere in life. He is going to drag you down. Do you not see? He got in prison then on parole and then prison again. What do you think? When does he get out?

Saturday. He gets out Saturday? Yes. All right. Security guard on. armed and ready. Here? Yes.

I'll be there. How long was he there? Since February? No. So it's pretty quick. So it's like May. Very quick. He was in California.

I know. Yeah. So he's not in prison. He's in like a correctional facility. And then he's going to be released to a halfway house. And he's going to do great. Well, historically no, but hopefully. Yeah.

Well, he has my name tattooed on him. So I hope that he can make the right changes. It's a prison tattoo What do you do for him? Just a jail tattoo What? Why is he with you? Um

Can we call him in prison? No, I was hoping he'd call me. Can you, well, you can't text him? You can't, no. It's just luck of the draw. He doesn't have a prison phone? He does, but he has to wait in line for it and... I'm on a cell phone.

Oh, no. Hidden? No. Of course not. He's trying to be good. Yeah. He is. I told him that this is Zen

of it if he wants to keep messing up, then he can do it without me. And he might do that. Who knows? Yeah, I would have called it by now, to be honest. But, okay, okay, I wish you getting into these finances because what the fuck even is this? Oh, I hear that you cried and said, I'm in survival mode. F*** off, you be in survival mode. You're not in survival mode.

Don't tell my producers you're in survival mode. Look at you. You're fucking around. You work 14 days a month. I don't want to hear it. You spend all your money on bullshit, probably. Yo, I do spend a lot of money on bullshit. But those 14 days I'm not working.

I'm serious. I've spent like probably a full month in the hospital. You were the opposite of serious in every way whatsoever. That's very true too. I don't want to hear it. Your career is nothing. You want to go be every type of influence you can possibly be. Yet you are.

You haven't even attempted one piece of content strategy or writing. That's not true either. I have a TikTok, but I have a review and I have other videos like cleaning stuff and just random content like cats or. or me singing. I don't like cats, by the way. I just have a video of cats. But, yeah. Listen.

Thanks for listening. That was a good listen. I don't have much to say. Because I'm hyper-focused on your mustache. Okay, let's go into these finances. If we may, where do you think your score is? Zero to ten, zero being the worst, ten being the best? Probably zero.

Probably zero. If you want to get your score, the free assessment. It's free. You'll see where you stand in the world of money, Calebhammer.com or dollarwise.com. Make sure you sign up for the dollar wise budgeting app. Get that free trial.

Sign up for the annual version to save a lot of money and get our budget friendly cookbook. Signed by me, mail directly to you. And if you want all our educational products and the premium version bundled together for 80% off, Dollar Wise Central, dollarwise.com. Check it all out, guys. Let's get into this money because, oh my,

what an interesting 40 minutes. And this is thick. almost as thick as they those in prison like it huh yeah, right? Am I right? They always got a... What do you? What do you mean? What do you mean?

The guys in prison, always got a thick girl waiting for them. Oh my God. Okay. Amazon Chase card. What is going on with this? It's been closed for a long time. And I... Okay, it's a growing interest. Yes.

You're just not spending on it. Yes. Well, it is about... No, it's closed. It is above the credit limit by 400. $159.228. Yeah, because of interest. No, because you didn't make payments, you dumb tit?

Yes, yeah. And it's not because of interest. If you make your payments, even with interest, you make progress. No, I just meant like it's able to be that high above it because the interest has accrued. That's all I meant. No, if you make your payments, it would not go that high. What are you talking about? I haven't made payments, nor have it heard.

There's the actual answer. Great. Okay, so when did you get into this dad? What's the story behind this card? It's an Amazon card, so I can use it at Whole Foods and Amazon. Okay, insightful. When I was living in Northern California, I kind of, like, I opened a lot of different credit cards because I was approved for them. And I was like, I can use this for that.

And like when you get an LLB card. You had no intent? Hmm? You had no intent? There were different intends for everything. Like Whole Foods is a good one for the Amazon card. And also just like when you sign up, they're like, we'll give you a free, whatever. So that's what it is.

You wanted the free rewards when signing up. Basically, yeah. Okay, how'd that work? It was... Yeah, you're in really bad debt. So this is a substantial balance. Listen, it says the minimum monthly is $7.75. And $0.87.

That is probably to catch up on all the bad payments. All the missed payments. Right. It's time to refresh your yard during spring backyard days at the Home Depot. Get low prices guaranteed on propane grills Starting at $179, like the next grill three burner gas grill. Or get $50 off the select Weber Spirit grill and bring big flavor to your backyard.

Then set the scene with Hampton Bay string lights that bring it all together. Shop spring backyard days for seven days at the Home Depot. Now through May 6th. Exclusion supplies to homedipo.com slash price match for details. Correct. I don't know what the normal minimum monthly is to write in there. It's 77. 77. You weren't making 77. Why?

Well, so when I was living up north, I opened all these credit lines and I was... We got that part. Why are you not making the payments? I fell back on, I fell behind on them because... $77. Yeah. I had like nine of those payments to make and I couldn't make any of them because... You go to $77 to eat. Because I had to... I had to move from where I was from and go live somewhere that...

I didn't... I mean, I chose to go live somewhere where I didn't have a job, but I worked for my rent and then that's why I was working at Jack in the Box because, and that's why I was working as a pool attendant because they were part-time jobs because I had a full-time job paying for my rent. I didn't understand how you did not pay your $77 a month payment though. It wasn't just 77. It was like I had to pick and choose which cards

I was going to pay that month and you know. Why? You have like three credit cards, right? You should have been able to own. You have a lot more credit cards than three. Yeah. And most of them are closed. Okay, let's take eight years to pay off minimum monthly payment and you ain't paying that minimum monthly payment.

Put your Amazon. Let me see what's going on there. Not much because I'm telling. Well, let's see. Okay. Yeah, passed to $694.87. That's wonderful. That's thrilling.

$177 of fees this year so far, $326 of interest this year so far. 26.49% interest rate. The only reason that this Amazon list is bad is because I just made purchase on it. Can we be honest? I bet you're just trying to keep up with the life. of the people that were living in wine country. That's why you hated their guts in the end. But I was making good money up there.

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And now that I'm well fed, let's get back to the episode. Healthcare isn't just about numbers on a chart. It's how you show up at work and your relationships and with yourself. But let's be real. Trying to navigate insurance, it's like decoding an ancient language with a calculator from 1994. And that is why I want to shout out today's sponsor, Roe. They've built something actually helpful, a totally free insurance checker that tells you which GLP1 medications like Hosempic or Wigovi are covered by your insurance. There's no calls, no paperwork, no press 4 to be ignored.

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That is RO.com slash safety for black box warning and full safety information about GLP1 medications. Let's get back to the episode. Because make it $1,700 a month, most things are good money. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I was making better money. Well, up there, I was living with my grandparents, too, my other grandparents. Yep, you're incapable.

Do anything on your own. We've established that. Yeah, but I was there to help him on hospice. No, you... Anyway. Come on. You said it was a cheaper way to live. That's your entire excuse.

That's not... Okay. Come on, yes, it is. No, it's not. I left my job to go and help them with their business, but it ended up being a sh-go. And... Oh, but your Amazon. Okay.

And tell me how much you're making, because you said you're making good money. I think they were paying like 25 or 28 an hour. In Northern California? Okay, come on. 40 hours a week here. You said this place was steps from the water. We just haven't found the steps yet. How much did we save? Enough.

Enough to get lost. Or you could book a stay with Hilton. Welcome to your ocean front room. Just steps from the water. The Hilton sale is on now. Book on Hilton.com or The Hilton app. and save up to 20% to get the stay you expected. When you want savings, not surprises.

It matters where you stay. Hilton, for the stay. Oh, for sake. Not much. Okay. This is just like... Skin care, skin care, skin care, lip, lip, or eye, eye, backpack.

This is all within, by the way, I just want to throw this out two days so far. Backpack, backpack, backpack. Luggage carrier. I shi, I shoo. toothbrush, toothpaste, travel, lots of travel, an endless amount of travel bags, airtacks travel back, travel bag, travel bag, dental floss. Buddy, you said not that much, and this is literally more than anyone's Amazon that I ever view.

A cushion steering wheel cover, a upgraded car center council cover, AirPod's case, a leather holder for the keychain thing that we put the air tag in. Travel bottles for toiletries. Wow, this is a big investment to go on this trip. Oh, by the way, AirPods to two wireless earbuds. Yeah. Fuck you. Screen protector for an Apple watch, maybe she has an Apple watch.

Fugh. You make $1,700 a month before expensive. Shut the fuck up. Endless supply of colorful socks. Endless supply of regular socks. Dude, I don't even know what you use this for because you sleep in a closet, but it's one of those things that makes you sit up in the bed. It's your heartburn.

A lot of those purchases are from my grandparents. Okay. Okay, and that anchor noise cancelling earbuds. Okay, those are for me. Absolutely, and then you got the AirPods. Great. Yeah. Yoga mat.

Yoga mat. To sleep on. Honestly. Washable under pads, waterproof, reusable, something. What? I don't know. You got it. More yoga mats.

I guess we double, we double layered. Sideproof mini spin pens. And finally, we're out of a fucking month. Thank goodness. I don't know. I'm sorry. I don't know what I was looking at there. Anyway, most of those are returned.

I just want everybody to know that. Not most, but the bad. Some of the bags, bags, bags. Yes. Not the bullshit, dude. What are you doing? I'm looking at your subscriptions, you tit. My God.

Finance show you. Yeah. Oh my gosh. AppleCare, Apple Care, Apple Care, Apple Care, Apple Care, Apple Care, Apple Care, Apple Care. She has one, two, three, four, five, six. Six Apple Cairs! Equated Care! Crunch and Roll, fuck you. I Cloud Plus, fuck off.

Apple Music, die. Ugh, she canceled their call map April 10th. I think that. Police scanner? Is that to make the... boyfriend avoid the jail time? I bet. More police scanner.

Oh, boy. What are we trying? Yeah? You're helping them stuff his bags? Keeping the police scanner on? Or just keeping tabs, you know? See where they're out and win. For what?

I don't know. He asked me to get it. So whatever. Oh, he did. This was for him. Yes. Oh my gosh, you fucking criminal enterprise. That's a good way to put it.

Moronic criminal enterprise. Yeah. Oh good. And your last pair of very pilots are stolen by your criminals, also a criminal boyfriend's criminal friend. This is true. What a great life you live. I know.

It's really good. You live with your grandparents, yet you just date criminals? What are you trying to do? What is your life? Where are you going to get ever? By the way, criminal yourself with the PayPal. PayPal scam.

Maybe you should have gone to jail. Maybe you didn't learn something. I wish I wouldn't have come Here? Yes Well you're here now girl Well my hair Okay

I look like a grandparent And I have a mustache And yes You're wearing a fucking funeral outfit I don't know what You're on your head A funeral out Oh

Dang it You know I tried really hard To pick a good Barret And I guess this wasn't it Huh Do we wear barrettes these days Sometimes

Lindsay do we wear Barrette's these days Okay Lindsay's being Very nice looks nice. Well, it's because she's nice. She is nice. Yeah.

She has the really nice hair. Good cop, bad cop. Okay. That's true. No, no, no, no. You just got cottage core going on. But, you know, you got like the Phyllis from the office look. What is this?

I'd like to lose weight. You know, that'd be cool. That would be cool. You know, you have to do something to do that. I know. I know. It's really hard to not just want to, like, give up on everything all the time. Okay.

So you're never getting. get anywhere ever. What's the point? What are we doing? What are we talking about? Yeah, good thought. I like to stop living like that because I feel like in my 20s, I didn't grasp the concept that like you make your own bed and you actually have to lie in it. And there's like this concept that. I never make my bed. Well, you've made a life for yourself and that's the important part. Your life was criminals. Yeah. So it's like I feel like I've gotten to a point where I'm like, oh my God, my choices matter. What I do matters. Time. matters, you know, how I spend my life.

Yet you spend double what you make still, even while realizing this. I guess so. Everyone has the grand awakening the moment they're on financial audit, ladies and gentlemen, but not the day before. I feel like I didn't know how much debt I was in. I didn't realize that I had spent that much. I, you know, I'm really just unaware. Exactly.

That's what I'm saying. Like, I'm just perpetually unaware. That's, yeah, kind of. Oh, I know. So that's your plan to pay stuff off, huh? No, it's just like you live your life, you try your best. You're not trying your best. I know that's true.

It's hard. It's hard when you have. Life is hard. I know. I know. We're just fucking born under this planet where the main planet's goal is to kill us. Who would have thought? Life is difficult.

Yes. We live a pretty damn comfy life compared to the rest of human civilization. Agreed. Throughout history. So maybe don't complain. Doom gloom all the time. Actually do something with your life. You have more controlled and you're allowing to, you're allowing yourself to think.

Phil is from the office, really? Yes. Dude. Is he married in the show? I don't care. Oh. Anyway. I don't know.

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So let's get back to these finances here. Yeah, the GSBank, what's going on with this? I wish I could see a statement. I don't know what that is. Oh, good. I hope it stands for Girl Scouts, but I know it doesn't. It doesn't, and you would not be permitted. I was a Girl Scout. You're 31.

I know, but you can still like that. I wish you weren't so child-like in everything. Yeah. Would be real nice. Listen, you've made 74% of the payments on this card on time. Mm-hmm. Okay. It must be the Apple card.

Can I see? I'd rather see a statement than something from your credit report. Oh, good. She sends a lot of money on crystals. That's wonderful. Oh, good. The balance is only. Just take the fuck.

Okay, Apple card. Wonderful. What's going on with this card? It's overdrawn. I got it initially because I wanted to get a MacBook. What a limit? Oh, 1700. Yeah, you are over.

You owe $1,771,035 cents. For fuck sake, why? No, payment due tomorrow. What, how much is... Normally... Yeah. Wouldn't it be nice if someone would just come in and be like, I'll pay that so that you can do that.

Dude, I know. I know. The world's fucking worse. I know. Okay, the minimum you can pay to keep it current is 57. We'll put it at there. Obviously, it wants you to pay a lot more than that. It wants you to pay a total of $1771.

Well, that entire balance, of course. Okay. Well, yeah, that's the total pay. Fair enough. So minimum monthly is $57. Ugh. Fing crazy. Interest charging like crazy.

Audible declined over the limit. Audible declined. Over the limit. Audible decline over the limit. Wonderful. So that's what's happened this month. What happened in May? Audible declined over the limit. Taco Bell declined over the limit. You try to swipe Taco Bell on here. Yes. Oh, f***. Ambition comes in all shapes and sizes. At First Citizens Bank, we roll with your goals because we're built for what you're building. Fit for your ambition for Citizens Bank.

Okay. June audible declined over the limit. Wow. So there are no purchases on it because I haven't had... How much you gave your grandparents for rent? But it doesn't make sense because they give you money for gas. I know. It's like, I know.

It doesn't make sense. It's kind of like they just pay me back like half of what I give them pretty much. So I was saying, how much do you pay them? 400. And then... Dude, just move out. Move the... Get away.

I know. Yeah, you're not there to take care of the minimum of fact. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do for them. I don't know where they're going to go. Them? Yeah. They're already planned out moving. Oregon. Get them there quicker. My

grandma can't go there. Like she... So we're waiting for her to die in the grandpa's movie? No, I don't know what the plan. So what are we talking about that? Because you said that's their plan. You just have to move. You just have to get out, dude. Yeah. You have to get out. You just their... They can't use social services they paid into. It's not 100% perfect. Absolutely easier.

Sending down 100%. But you're delaying your entire life living there. And they're honestly taking care of you, baby and you. Well, I'm just Phyllis from the office anyway. Yes, I agree. We all know that. She lived a better life, though. So that's actually not the case. She was a pencil pusher. I'm just kidding. I don't know.

Anyway, enough. Hey, you're obsessed with this. I don't know. It's her full. I don't know what to say. Her full. Welcome to the show that you agreed to come on to that you watch the onboarding phone calls and all the conversations we had before. I know.

I know. Okay. So, anyway. You're going to harp? No. So Apple Card. Yeah. To get a laptop.

Okay. Get a laptop. For your very special writing. Because I was in school and I wanted to. a better computer than what I started out with. For a writing degree? Yeah. Anyway, I've taken a lot of classes.

I have a psychology degree too, but I just want to pursue English because that's... So what is pursuing English to you? It's learning it. And like, okay, so... Yes, we know you're able to, what was it, transcribe English? Yeah. So I want to become more proficient at it. Like, I want...

What are going to do with that? I'm going to write. Oh, fuck. Okay. The whole thing. Send this to your kids before they go to college. Send this episode to your kids before they go to college, guys. Thank you.

Yeah, do something for your children before they go to college so that they can have some kind of success and not be like me. Oh, you're blaming this all on your parents. No, I'm not blaming it all. Then what are you saying? I'm saying that it's hard to navigate things when you don't have people who help you. Like people who have their parents help them with school, help them with college applications and things like that

and how to finance and how to do things like that. They're set up a lot better. How do people get that? A lot of people I knew A lot of people I know are still Like in relation to... No, I just think you're an endless victim mindset And you think everyone has it easier around you

And it's not even close to the case I mean that's okay I'll get your course career certification So when you need to get a real job You can actually get one What do you think? Unlike what though? I'm not fucking accounting or whatever you want

It's in the trades now too There's so much you can do Okay, Brightway main financial Okay, no progress here Oh, we didn't pay Oh, we're over the limit F fuck me Oh, you, fuck.

Why, dude, why do this yourself? What are you even trying to do? I don't know, man. I was just trying to live a good life and... No, you're doing the opposite. I know, I created a bad one for myself. No, shit. Why aren't you doing anything to fix it?

$1,514.41 is what you owe. Minimum. What's the normal minimum? Obviously, you have a lot of stacked up because you're not paying. You're growing $40 in fees, $31.19. In interest. $1,000 a $1,000 limit. I don't know what normal.

minimum normally. Probably $60 or something like that. $60.000. Of course she owes $845 to catch up. I know what the, what the, I know what the, um, I know what the Chase credit card minimum limit is. What did you build this up with over when and what is going on? It could have been anything. It's like hair care products, um, or nail polish or dresses or jeans or anything that I wanted at the time. Splurging. He didn't a stick behavior. Like, why do you get to be splurging? I don't do anything. Why do you think you're entitled to that? Because I want to, it's like, it's almost like the, I'm stuck in this mindset of like tomorrow's never guaranteed to live for today kind of thing.

That's stupid. Tomorrow is statistically likely to be there. I tell myself that and for some reason I can't comprehend it. And it's like a coping mechanism for like sadness and things like that. Like just a little treat here and there. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Well, oh no. My criminal boyfriend is a criminal.

I'm sad. That's the least of my concerns. I've got others sad. Everybody has sadnesses, you know, but for some people it's just hard to get out of it, I guess. I don't know. And especially when you're me and have acted like how I have. Oh my goodness.

When he was out of prison, you're using this credit card to get him not just closing food, but burner phones for his business. The boyfriend, my boyfriend? Yeah. I bought him a couple phones from like Walmart, I think. but it wasn't, it was just because he would lose his phones a lot. You think that's why?

No, I bought them because I wanted to be in touch with him. I was like, here's a phone so I can call you. Yeah. How often was he losing phones? Maybe like once a month. I didn't buy, I bought like two phones for him, I think. And he would try to keep them if I bought, like he tried to keep the ones I got him longer than the one she would just acquire.

Why do you want such a delinquent? Dude, he's just really fun. and he's like... Yeah, he does a lot of jokes and he goes crazy. Sure, he's fun. I know. That's the future you want? No.

And honestly... Then why are you still with him? Because I think that he can change. Ha, ha, ha. I think that he can do better if he tries. I think he's... In you, probably, but in life, I don't know. I think so.

So you're going to support him? Yes. Can't support yourself. You live in a closet. He's my husband. So all of my finances are his too. Yeah. Just kidding.

We're not actually married, but. I see you a fucking creature. It's not funny. I'm sorry. I'm trying to get your fucking together. I got to take everything you're saying with truth. If I can't trust you, what am I going to do? I told you the truth, though, so you can trust me.

I just feel like reality is really weird. Yeah, reality is very weird. And I don't, like, I don't know. Just existing is like what's real, what's in my mind. Oh, my, what is happening? Yeah. No, don't. Don't try to say that you and I are agreeing.

Oh. No, no, no. 28.49% interest rate. Fees and interest charge like crazy, of course. Who would have thought? So how do I get... What? Nothing.

How do I get rid of a mustache? Do I just wax it? Or is it because I'm wearing makeup? See, this is why. No. This is why, because my mind is not focused on the, you know, we're doing something here. And I'm just focusing on. Uh, we have razors from another show we did.

No. Razors. I don't. Anyway. That's how people shave. Razors, yes. But waxing works. Waxing.

So, okay, never mind. Got it. After pay. After pay. Could have afterpaid some razors. I guess we did American Eagle, Purology, Pharmacy, Beauty, Tilly's instead. I don't even shave my legs.

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Yeah. That's what I'm saying. Oh, I was ready for this, I guess. I'd never look at guest legs. I know. That's not something to be ready for. I wasn't expecting to even tell you that, but I was expecting to be like torn apart. And these lights don't do anybody.

any favors, you know, girls come on here with their unblended everything. And I'm like, oh, my God. Anyway, I feel bad for people who come on here and now I understand why. Are you doing it? I honestly want to try to understand what you're trying to tell me. I think I watch your shows a lot. And I think often, like, what would he say about this? Or, you know, like, I try to use that as an inspiration.

kind of thing, like what you say. So being here with you in person talking about it is the best, you know, thing I could do. Okay. I manifested this. What is going on with afterpay? I can't use them anymore right now because I owe them money. If I pay them, I might be able to use them. But as I probably, but you shouldn't.

It's like PayPal. Can't use that either. No, I'm being told you banned. From after pay? Yeah. No, I just owe them money. They email me like every day really nicely like, hey, we have. we have a payment plan set up for you.

Okay, just do that when you can. And then eventually it'll probably just go to collections. What the fuck are you even trying to do, man? What's the total? Okay. But I think this is, okay, $390. And $29. minimum monthly payment.

I don't even, I'm just going to say $100 bucks. This is four payments, so $100. Sure. Oh, you're banned from Klarna as well. Okay. I yeah that Clarna What's Alton FCU? That is a federal

You just missed your most recent payments It's a federal credit union That's good It's maxed out who would have thought I know it's a credit union I'm just talking about the account Like what's going on Oh

You know $486 It's a minimum monthly payment Of $25 normally you missed your last payment Yeah I thought the account was closed but actually I was gonna I was gonna say the reason that I know the chase

You think every account is closed I know because it's just like well it's probably closed because I haven't paid it in so long it's like it's like easier to run away from your problems because they just exist on the internet

and like you get letters and stuff about it but you still live your day to day life and if you have cash like from your jobs and you just owe a lot of money on credit you can like trick your brain but it doesn't work though because you just live in constant

constant anxiety over your money problems so I am working on paying that one so that they can let me use the card again not that I want to use the card but I the accounts You just said so I can use my card again I mean I could if I wanted to I want to keep the account open because it's one of the only credit lines they still have

that I can use what do you care about that specifically because I know multiple answers I want to know It is important to have longstanding credit. Okay. That's why you care about your credit score. Yes. Yeah. And then... For what? What do you intend to do? I will hopefully get an apartment at some point of your own.

Yeah. Housing, cars, things like that. You know, you need credit. You need good credit. We're in a wedding ring? It's not a wedding ring. It's like a cladal ring. It's on the... I know. It's just because I like to wear it. I like, I like rings and it's the finger that fits on. Okay. I don't think this guy's going to stay with her after he gets out

because he wasn't with her before he got out, only got technically with her when he was in. And I think she just is pretending marriage. This is... In fact, in this conversation so far with you and you thinking you're the one taking care of your grandparents, I'm not even sure this guy is with you. I'd say he is.

I wonder what he would say. He would say that I'm the love of his life and that he never wants to be without me. Because he wants someone to call him while he's in prison. well you know time will tell yeah Friday I don't think so no we were together a long time before that we've been through a lot of shit together

but he didn't call you his girlfriend because he's an idiot he's kind of dumb but it's okay I love him anyway and this ring wasn't from him and I know yeah but I have other rings that are from him but anyway I'm just saying like I don't wear it there to indicate that I'm married

I just like wearing rings bruh oh I don't think she okay Okay, okay. I know. Okay, okay, we have another card of card. This one was paid off, oddly enough, but then it was immediately spent on again. So, and I'm not going to consider you likely spent.

Oh, it's a secured card. Okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Well, Mountain View Market, Taco Bell, Amazon, Amazon, coconut, so this is where she gets Amazon. I'm not the Amazon card because I was going to say she definitely got a lot. Banda Express, Amazon, surf through Little Cesar, Amazon, just meets wild coffee. Who the fuck are you to spend $450 on all bullshit on one card when you make $1,700 before any expenses on a monthly basis and are being taken care of by her disabled grandparents? Again, both sets.

$450 in a month spending on bullshit? Who do you think you are doing that? Uh. Who the f-do you think you are spending that kind of money? That is disgusting. Well, it's money that I make. What? It's money that I make, so I spend it.

Yeah, but you're not going out there living a good, f***ing. life, you could be independent. You could be, you're 31 living in a closet. And you probably think you're fucking Harry Potter knowing your mystical mind you live in. Everybody calls me. That's funny. I don't think that. Oh, fuck.

Mystical minds. Yeah. Yep. Flip to her another random page. Dude, this isn't. Another random page. You brought it, so this is what you get. Random page.

I don't want. No, random page. Random page. Here. Cool. Random page. Apply January 2nd to February 28th with letter A-Z-I-D income. This isn't a good notebook for this.

County Assessor's Office phone number, Ebell phone number, Phoenix phone number. I'm... There are... What else is there in there? There's love letters and things like that. Can I see one? You can see, but you can't read. To who?

To Dallas. That's his fake name. Okay. Let's go. Come on, Arthur. Fine. You think I wasn't going to on the show? Come on.

Baby doll. Baby doll. I'm at the hospital with my dad still. They said they'd be transferring him today, but now they're saying tomorrow. I miss you. You said you're on lockdown. Now, first of all, why are you writing this if this isn't going to him? I've written him a lot of letters, but...

I hope you still get to call sometimes. What? Okay, sounds like you guys haven't talked in a while. Because he's on lockdown. He was on lockdown. And he's totally real. Okay. And that you get your commissary.

Crossing out some words, I love you. Sorry I haven't been writing. Yeah. Because we talk on the phone. I thought you weren't getting my letters. I did think that. What? I'm tired.

Okay All coming together, ladies and gentlemen Why did I bring this? Why did I bring this? That's a fantastic question Because I did not request it Oh, I'll get there But I'm just diving through

And I'm learning you, dude Oh, you have three phones, that's great I'm being told no one requested that notebook Obviously not. I brought it to take notes We'll get there I'm still going through the learning section Okay.

Auto cred. What is this? $3,816.19. This is a car payment that is no longer a thing. Repoed? No. Uh, totaled. You still have to pay.

I paid it. It's paid off. Oh, wait. No, this is my current car payment. No, yeah, I owe that. That's real. I pay that each month. Sorry.

Okay. It's worth $5,000, whatever it is. What is it? It's a, 2015. Super Reforster. No, that's that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, is. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Car. You owe three thousand eight hundred sixteen dollars and nineteen cents. What is your minimum fee payment? Like three 85. What is your interest rate? I don't know. Okay.

I know. I've been trying to find the documents that stayed all. You've been trying to find the documents. Have you attempted to, you know, talk to them? Nope. Okay. I was hoping it'd be in my email and then I looked once and then I didn't try again after that. Oh, that's our attempting to.

It's like I get these ideas in my head. Altalone 1, FCU. This is your other car that is totaled? Yes. Well, you sometimes make payments sometimes don't. I don't know. So old car. So nothing to speak for this.

No asset to speak of. Nope. Okay, she owes 8,000. Oh, for, for, this is paying off. No, it's not. not. It is, though. No, it's not.

I called them after getting this. I called them. Okay, well, I'll cross it out for now, but I believe most things you think are reality or not. Maybe. Okay. Some Schwab thing? Yes, Les Schwab.

What do you owe Le Schwab? Probably around $400. For what? What is this? Tires and Carmen. maintenance. Is there, yeah, minimum fee payment is 50 bucks. Interest probably accruing.

Sometimes make payments, sometimes don't. Dude, this is, I don't understand how you're even just, what? You just f***ed around so much. I know, man. And I was just like, what the fuck, right? I feel the same. I'm in the same boat as you, not understanding. But then, okay, okay.

So it's like, I get these ideas in my head and I'm like, I got to do it now. Oh, I know you get ideas in your head. It's like impulsivity. And that's why I'm like, oh, I tried to look that up. But then I stopped after I didn't get there because I have no, like, it's like I have no discipline. There's no, there's a lack of discipline here. There's a lack of a lot there. Yeah.

Student loans, federal student loans, $17,470. I assume you're like on a $0 payment plan, right? Correct right now. I mean, what do you mean by that $0 payment plan? That's in your income based fee payments, zero bucks. Oh, I don't, like I, I'm on a deferment. Right. It's, there be, the payments are deferred right now.

there is no payment plan in place. Okay, well, all deferments are coming to an end, so you better pay up, dude. What do you mean? All the, well, are you requesting additional deferments? Because the deferments that were just there automatically are all coming to an end. Oh, well, actually, no, you're at school. Yeah, if you're actively in school. Sorry, sorry.

It's okay. You had me scared. I was like, what did the president do? Did he do something? Well, he's capping how much you can borrow in terms of student loans. Is he? Yes. And the student loans you're borrowing right now have,

have very different payment types when you come back. Your income base ain't going to be as simple as it was with your previous balances. We're going to have to see, but you're going to owe money on a monthly basis. Yeah. That's what got signed in the law under the Big Beautiful one. $17,470 currently. How much you borrowing per semester and for how much more and longer? I don't know.

Okay. And probably at least until like 2020. Toyota Motor. Collections? This one, I don't... This one's closed, yeah, it's in collections, essentially. But it shouldn't exist. Well, it does.

I know. I've had... Why should it not exist? Because this is for a different car that was totaled, and I had insurance and gap coverage through the company and... That's what I'm saying. I spent a long time trying to figure that out. Target, also in collections.

Why is Target in collections? Just because I didn't pay my... Monthly bill. Why? I don't know. I feel like it was already, it was probably, it's probably like the mentality that it's already maxed out.

I can't use it. If I pay the minimum on it. Chevron card. Collections. Yes. Why? These are cards that I opened when I had a better income and that I paid,

I would pay off. And then when I lost that and didn't make anything, I lived off my savings and stopped making payments to anything. Webbank.com collections. Why? I don't know what that is. Of course. Well, this one's 1,514. The last one was 1,272.

I can't believe it's $40,000. How much is 48? 40. See, this is, I don't even remember. 46,670. Okay. Capital one, collections. Why? Same reason as everything else, man. Just spending, spending, spending.

not paying. Another Capital One in collections. Yep. The last one, 293. This one, 945. Yeah, I think they gave me a card. Then they gave me another card. They were trying to give me a chance.

I don't know why, but looking at you, I'm going to go to a Chinese buffet for dinner. I have not had that urge in about a decade and a half. I do not know what's going on. I can't answer it myself. I don't know. Midland Credit Open. What is this?

I don't know. Behind. You're behind. Yeah. I don't know what your minimum is. I don't even know. Well, it's about to go to collections if you don't fucking... All right.

Well, 336 there. I'm going to say a $50 minimum fee payment. I don't fucking know. You're going to make me go to a second sheet. That is a rarity. Oh, my... What is wrong, dude? What the fuck is wrong?

More Midland... Oh, this is like you did consolidations, no? Oh, probably. Yeah. Probably? No, no. I've only done one consolidation. It was through all to one.

Oh, well, these are different accounts within Midland itself. account, like probably Sephora or Victoria's Secret. I would say. Or they might be commended. You know, I'm going to say a $50. Down minimum monthly payment. I don't know. They're probably more than that.

It's probably like 60. Well, I don't know. Listen, the overall thing, portfolio recovery. My gosh. Those, these are just, yeah, these are people who have attained my debt from who I actually owed in the first place. So the accounts are closed and they now. Yes, this one's collection.

Sorry. Yeah. Last one. Okay. Yeah. They're all collections. Collections. Yep.

That's okay. Okay. Another collection, 613. Okay, you've just never done anything in your life. Yeah. No offense, but you are a complete failure. I'm calling it as I see it. I'd like to change that.

I'd like to... What have you done to change it because I see nothing? Apple Cash, what's going on this? What's going on with it? Do, do you know. Are you singing to you though? It's like background music for the Apple Cash. It has a song when you pull it up?

I guess. I just do what I want. We need to study her. As the human race, we need to study her. Okay, this is what you use to send your boyfriend money. Glad I have my producers to answer your question because you're incapable. F*** a moron. Inmate photos. Yep.

Yeah, I sent him some pictures of me. not anything inappropriate because that's not allowed in jail. They're innocent photos. Like selfies. So anyway. That would be really weird. No, no, no, no. Do not ask me to see what she sent.

I do not want to say no, no, no. I don't want to show you. Thank goodness. Absolutely wonderful. I'm glad you answered that. Oh, boy, boy. Okay. Cash app, $2.20.

Apple pay. Wait, what is that? Cash app, $2.20. I think to prison, to prison, I don't fucking know. Oh, oh. To someone, to someone, to someone. Names are blank. I don't, too. Just sending a fucking to someone.

To Dallas. And Starbucks. That's to the guy. Yeah. Through cash app? You can get it through cash app? Yeah. Oh, no, no.

So, first of all, yes. Second of all, a lot of those are probably from before he went in there. No. Or to people. This is most recent month, you said it? Oh, I don't know then. Probably to. sometimes he would send to other people through his account, but I would do it for him.

Okay, great. No. Okay, surprisingly, almost $3,000 in retirement. How that's not been withdrawn? I do not know. She might not know this exists. Okay, Chase account, $45. Amazon Prime, and that's the end of that.

Okay, weird. Vero Bank account. This is the big one. What happened while you were in the green room? What? What happened to what you're in the green room? What do you mean? What happened while you were in the green room?

Something happened. What was it? I watched a video and signed some documents. Those are the classic normal things. Something interesting happened. What was it? I don't remember. Oh my fuck you've broken.

How are you going to make it through life? She got a call from a collector. Oh, yes, I did. Yeah, my phone goes off like every day with phone calls from collectors. So I know. You think it's not real. but it is because they bother you forever and you have to live with this debt inside of your mind.

Okay in this account, cash app on money, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Bath and Body Works, Café Smitten, Cafe Smithin, Cash App, Cash Up, Cashup, Pyrenees Cafe. Cash App, Cash App, Cap, Cash App, Apple Cash. Endless amount of money when we have no money whatsoever.

Cash App, Apple Cash App, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Apple Cash. This is like the main. From the people that are connected to your boyfriend, definitely legal maneuvers. No. That's. Dutch bros. What?

What? What? I was just going to say that your thing about cash app, whatever. Dutch bros. Apple Cash. Apple Cash. Is this the new PayPal scam for you? No.

Uh-huh. It is not. I totally believe you. This is all real money that came in to my account. Applecash hot topic. com. Yeah. Wild Coffee Apple, Apple Cash, Apple Cash, Wild Coffee, Apple Bill.

Dave membership fee. Oh, she used this fucking Dave. I don't use Dave anymore. Well, you have the membership fee lady. Not anymore. This just happened. Shut the fuck up. Objectively.

It's changed since then, I guess. I don't. I don't know. I hope so. $290 in the savings account. And that's about where it lies. Yep. It's like.

But isn't. That is not where it lies. You started with $5. 161. Oh. But like generally. Anyway. No.

It's like I get money and I have that amount of money and then I'm like, what exactly can I spend that will take up all of that money that I have? Spend double what you make. I know. Well, I don't know how because I don't have any credit available. So every money that I spend is cash. Some of that money was going to credit. But. Yeah.

Putting money towards debt. It's still money going out. But I don't put... Your savings went down. Yeah. Oh, well, I don't fucking... I don't know. It's insane.

Fidelity, 36. Taken out because she took out money from 423. Yep. Savings plan. 2,689. Okay, so 5,000 in retirement, I think, just about... Horrible for your age, but oddly surprising. I like to...

No. Have something, you know, as far as my future goes. Did you take money out of things? I don't want to. I mean, the spending was ridiculous. No, no. What's, what? I don't know what that is.

Stop. Okay. Your minimum fee payments, there's $780. How does the utility situation work in the house? I don't pay utilities. Internet, anything like that? No. Just my cell phone.

What's your phone bill? 113 a month. Oh, yeah. Okay. I would definitely switch to helium. That is for sure. once your phones are paid off. Oh, yeah, phones.

Yeah. TEP fund, anything else? But you're financially supporting him when he gets out of jail, right? No. How's he getting supported? He's going to get a job. Immediately the day of. No.

Okay, so. He's going to go to a halfway house, and they're going to have everything he needs there. They're going to feed him and clothe him and help him get a job. You're not going to go out to eat it all. Huh? Together. You're not going to go out to eat it all. Well, I don't even.

I mean, okay. Let's be realistic. I have a few options here with what I can do next in my life. No. L.A. No. In my life, I said. But I could go to L.A.

And live there and be closer to my dad. And that'd be ideal. Not a chance you to afford it. I know, I know. But I could, I mean, if I found a job. How? Your resume was a joke. And it wasn't even, like the resume itself together is a couple funny moments.

It wasn't the worst resumes. It's just your experience is trash. What do you convert that to? Do I what? Convert that to. What job do you want? What would you want to do? Okay, I would like to find something that I can do.

Oh, the creative shit. Remotly. Anything remote. That's ending in that's for the highest skilled individuals possible. Unless you're doing like some call center job. But do that. I don't know. Right?

I don't know. Well, no, do that. A call center job? Become customer service? I, yeah. I have a lot of experience in customer service. There you go, do that. Yeah, but yeah, I just, I need anything right now that's more reliable than DoorDash and Uber.

It's not constantly putting miles on my car. That's probably one of the first AI job gooms or just shipped overseas anyway, but... Customer service, I know. Yeah. We are hiring for customer service right now. Denied. Besides remote, let's talk about what kind of job you'd want. What are you interested in?

Sets writing... Uh... Nothing. No, just kidding. I don't know. I like, I think that I would be decent at like a, like a clerical job like Phyllis. Just kidding. Like a like an admin worker somewhere. Maybe I was thinking like for LA County or somewhere like that. You mentioned journalism to Colton.

Yeah. Yeah. No, dying industry if there ever has been. Well, I know. It's, it's struggle. anything that, you know, might actually be successful? Not at this point. So that's that, though. Yeah, exactly. I don't know what to do.

Okay, then I'm ending this conversation because there's no fucking point. What do you spend on gas on a monthly basis? Like $300. Car insurance. 160. TP fund, $100, anything else you need. You can probably do $200 a month on grocery since you used your grandparents, medical health care, co-pays. Anything?

Yeah, medical, or, yeah, I pay like $50 a month for insurance. What about co-pays and shit, though? Co-pays, I don't even know. You know, is there appointments or the medications? For me, no, because I have spent so much of my time focusing on taking care of the other people in my life that I have. I'm being so serious. Subscriptions, no, pet insurance, no.

Well, you might need to. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. Okay. Specifically. You did not. I did. Okay.

No surprise. You're over by $400. I don't know. You just, dude. I think you've given up in this world, in this life. I haven't. Okay. What?

I don't know. I want to do something. I want to do anything. That's great. Anything. I want to do anything that can take me places so I can do things and be a person and be a good member of society. and live a good life.

You can't tell me even one thing you're interested in that might have a decent career truck. Let her work in. Do accounting. I'm bad on the spot. I don't know what to say. Do accounting. Um,

I don't know. I don't know how. It's like the... Translate to an accounting degree. I can get you an accounting certification through course careers again. Stop. This waste of time on a degree that's going to result in nothing.

I can't stop with English. I really can't. Oh, my fuck. It's so ingrained in me that I can't ever. Yeah, it's called you were born in the United States, so you speak English. No. It's called throughout history, people have been recorded saying very important things, and I want to read about what they have to say so that maybe someday.

You can't read without getting a degree in English. Maybe Sunday I can become enlightened. You cannot read. When you're taking English classes, they assign you books to read based on certain things, and then they want you to reflect on what you've read. You can't do that. How about college holding your hands? You can't go read books?

No, I would like a structure with my classes. I want a professor. I want a professor to tell me how to do my work and to judge me and have expectations and grade me, you know? I hate to leave you with no hope, but there's no fucking hope, man. And this is, this is... Well, maybe I can do accounting, like you said. It needs to be honest.

This is a waste of time. Come to the financial auto post show. I know with her something. crazy is going to come out that the producers know that I don't know because I know for a fact we didn't even hit half the shit. I know I feel like we're any. Quiet now. Hammer financial score. We're not. We're right on time. Trust me. I didn't make this go a minute longer than I needed to. Hammer financial score. Spending in a budget. Overspend zero out of ten. Debt

collection zero out of ten. Emergence of nothing and savings zero out of ten. Less than a thousand. Retirement. Trematically buying for your age, at least there's a little something there. Two hundred ten. Real estate is zero out of ten. Hammer financial score. I think it's going to be, yep, rounded it up. Point five out of 10. Joy and Hammer Elite, link in the description below. Three shows a day. Post at Best Membership on YouTube.

Help us get to the largest. We'll see you there for a crazy post show. I bet. Watch financial audit. Shut the fuck up. You guys have been doing this criminal shit since 2020? I'm a snake in the grass. You know, who knows what I'm doing.

You deserve to go to jail because you've got him burner phones? That's a different. Honestly, would it be surprised if the money that was going through that wasn't in continuation of scams. knowing how you live your life. This is just what he's been up to as far as legal things that he's been convicted of. The shit you guys have got up to is crazy. Glusive members' content?

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